Thank you all so much for the lovely reviews! It feels so good to be back – I kept thinking about the story throughout the day and couldn't wait to get home and get started writing again. Here is Chapter Twenty-Three of Howl:

Favorite Line:

"I'm never losing you, never again."

"…and, as long as nothing changes, you should be able to be released tomorrow. Wouldn't that be nice, to finally go home?"

I blinked, escaping from my reverie and, instead, focusing on the doctor standing in front of me, his own gaze distracted by the chart in front of him. He was studying it closely, making sure that there were no red flags that would hinder my healing progress anymore. When I didn't answer right away, he glanced up, making sure that I was still with him.

"Yes," I said, smiling at him. "That will be wonderful."

Satisfied, he returned my smile. "Good. I'll let your nurse know so they can get a headstart on your discharge papers. Will you be able to have someone bring you home?"

Nodding, I said, "Oh yes. My grandparents are desperate to get me home, they won't miss it."

Once the doctor was finished with our check-up, he disappeared out into the hallway, onto his next patient. I sighed, resting my back against my pillow. Going home, I mused to myself. I was so ready to get back to my own bed, to not have to listen to nonstop beeping of machines every night, to get back to being me. For so long, it seemed like that was an impossible dream, but here we were, less than 24 hours away from realizing it.

Sighing, I ran my fingers through my damp hair. Today was one of the first days that I could finally take a shower, washing my hair in sudsy bliss and allowing myself to start feeling human again. Of course, it would've been nice to be able to shower before seeing nearly everyone that I had ever met in Beacon Hills the last few days. My grandparents, Uncle Jake, Stiles, and Isaac had, of course, been here every day, albeit at different times. But I had been surprised to see so many others making their way to visit me and make sure I was okay – Gavin (who admitted to me that Derek had stopped at his house in his search for me, although he refused to give me any details, much to my chagrin), Scott, and Allison, who had even brought Lydia with her, who had, of course, made a comment about the dreary décor of the hospital room.

Then, Uncle Jake, during one of his visits, had shocked me by bringing in Professor Kohler in tow. They both had explained how Professor Kohler had been one of the first to come to him (after Derek and Isaac) to come to him and let him know that he had noticed Agent White skulking around my campus, even after Kohler had warned him that he was not welcome to come and go as he pleased. After seeing his car there the night before, Kohler had decided to give my Uncle a visit and let him know that there was something going on with that man. He, of course, had no idea that Agent White had lived in Beacon Hills all those years ago. He just thought there was something off – thankfully so, or else Uncle Jake wouldn't have taken Derek and Isaac seriously afterwards.

Thinking of Derek and Isaac, I remembered how often Isaac had been at the hospital visiting me, usually with my grandparents. According to Isaac, right after they had seen me for the first time after my surgery, he had broken down and told them that, even though he had been the one to find me, Derek had been the one to instantly know that something was off. He explained how Derek had spent those days relentlessly searching for me, unwilling to believe that I would just take a few days away from everyone without a hint of a warning. Even so, my grandparents had taken a liking to Isaac, especially my grandmother, who loved any excuse to make someone feel special and loved, especially if that person just happened to save the life of her granddaughter. Smiling to myself, I couldn't help but think about how Isaac seemed to be enjoying it as well – I'm sure it had been a long time since he'd felt that unwavering love and adoration and, after saving my life, I was thrilled to have him included in our little family.

My thoughts wandered to that fateful afternoon when Isaac found me, and ultimately to Agent White. Uncle Jake had let me know the day before that he had received a call from one of his deputies, who had found Agent White, bound, gagged, and badly beaten, sitting on the front steps of the Beacon Hills Police Station, unconscious. He refused to say what happened to him after he vanished from the office complex that he had been holding me hostage, just that he wanted a lawyer. Uncle Jake assumed he was going to make a deal to get out of facing the death penalty. Knowing that meant that I wouldn't have to testify and relive those days all over again, I had no complaints. I could just breathe easier knowing that he was locked behind bars, and not ruining any more lives.

"Jane?"

I jumped, snapping out of my thoughts, and realized that my grandmother was standing in front of me, a concerned look on her face. Knowing that my face most likely betrayed just where my mind had been going, I plastered a smile on my face.

"Hi Nana," I said, even though I had a feeling she right through my smile. "You just missed out on the good news – my doctor said that I should be able to go home tomorrow."

"That's wonderful news," beamed Nana. "Just wonderful. I'll let Isaac know – he already said that he wants to bring you home."

"Oh, he doesn't have to do that," I began. "There's no need for him to go through the trouble – "

"He's insisting, dear," said Nana. "Let him be. He wants to do this for you. I was just talking to him last night actually, before we left the hospital. I was able to get a little more information about this Derek, even though you have yet to say a word about him."

I sighed, knowing that this would be coming at some point. I had been avoiding talking about Derek with my grandparents, as I had no idea how I could explain our relationship. Ever since Isaac had explained who had really been behind saving me, Nana had been adamant in mentioning his name as often as possible. She apparently had even asked Isaac about him a couple times, who was taken aback – clearly he had underestimated just how relentless she was. More than once, she had seemed disappointed when she stepped into my hospital room and found that it was empty. She wasn't the only one who felt that heavy dissatisfaction of not seeing him here with me.

It was true – ever since I had arrived at the hospital, I had seen so many people that I had met in Beacon Hills…except for Derek Hale. Every night, I would drift to sleep, a loneliness gnawing at me and just wishing that I could see him. I had been tempted several times to ask Isaac about him but, every time I got the nerve, fear would grip me and I couldn't help but think, I wasn't sure if I wanted to know the answer as to why he was avoiding me.

My grandmother was staring at me with a pointed look now, clearly growing impatient with being left in the dark about the mystery man.

"I'm sorry, Nana," I said with a sigh. "I just haven't been up to talking about him yet. But…I know how much you've been wanting to know about him."

Nana sank down into the seat beside my bed, her gaze softening as she continued to watch me. "I didn't mean to pressure you, Jane. I just want to know about this man who clearly has very strong feelings for you."

"I know, Nana. He…he's a complicated man," I told her. "We met about a month after I moved here. He came here after his sister who passed away, who was actually one of my friends."

"Is she the one that stayed over our house that night during that nasty storm?" she asked.

"Yes," I responded, blinking in surprise. "I can't believe you remembered that."

"You'd be surprised what this old brain can still do," she smiled.

Returning her smile, I continued, "We bonded over Laura's death…he'd already lost so many of his family members, and he was very close to Laura. And…I could understand that pain." I looked down at my hands, the gauze wrapped tightly around my bruised, injured wrists. "We got to know each other and, the more time I spent with him, the more I liked what I learned. He's a hard man to get to know – he's your stereotypical loner, putting people at a distance, just so he isn't hurt again. But, with me…he let me in, let me see the man behind that wall."

My grandmother was watching me closely as I continued. "I'm sorry that I never told you about him. It all happened so fast, and before I knew it—"

"You fell in love with him," she finished, her voice gentle as she saw my hands start to tremble.

"I did," I responded. "I fell hard. Don't get me wrong, Derek's hardly perfect. He's rough around the edges, and so stubborn, hot-headed, and he has his grumpy moments. But…when I was with him, it was like no one could see me – the real me – but him. He could finish my sentence before it even had a chance to pop in my head. He's gentle with me and kind. He has this sarcastic sense of humor that you don't even see coming and he can always make me laugh. He'd protect me in a heartbeat, putting his life on the line. When I'm with him, I just feel…complete."

Surprised by the tears on my cheeks, I brushed them away, laughing to myself. "I don't know why I'm even crying."

Nana took my hand in both of hers, a warm smile spread across her face. "I do," she said. "I don't need to meet this man – as much as I want to, I might add – to figure out how much you love him. I can see it all over your face. What I don't understand is why you two aren't together anymore."

I hesitated, dropping my gaze from her face and sighed. "It's complicated, Nana."

"Love always is, my dear," she responded. "It's up to you uncomplicate it, or else you'll lose out on something that some people don't ever have the fortune of finding."

"But Nana," I began, "what if – "

"You can say 'what if' over and over again, sweetheart," said Nana. "But you, of all people, know how short life is, and how, if you keep focusing on the 'what if', you'll wake up one day and realize that an entire lifetime of missed opportunities have gone by. Your mother and father knew that and would be so disappointed to see you sitting by, wasting your life away when the love of your life is only a few feet away from you. All they ever wanted was for you to be happy. I remember how your father would worry about you staying home every weekend, never going out with friends or on a date. He just wanted you to be happy. And I can see how happy this man makes you – don't let that slip away, Jane."

"I love you, Nana," I beamed at her, tears streaming down my face. I wrapped my uninjured arm around her, holding her close as I breathed in her floral perfume.

"I love you too, Janey," she responded, holding me tight.

I desperately tried to find some sleep that night, but I couldn't bring myself to actually fall asleep. Maybe I was just excited with the prospect of finally going home, or restless from my conversation with my Nana that afternoon. Either way, after I was able to doze off for maybe an hour or two, I found myself awakening, shifting in my bed. I turned over and froze at the sight of someone sitting in the chair, who seemed just as startled to see that I was awake.

"Derek," I breathed, his face finally coming into focus. My heart was pounding my ears at my first sight of him since that night he had slept in my apartment with me. He looked the same – that jet black hair, those forest green eyes that were so intense I felt like I could see right through me, the stubble of his beard darkening his strong jawline. "How long have you been here?"

His gaze slipped from my face, turning down towards his shoes. "Ever since visiting hours were over."

Continuing to watch him closely, I asked, "How often have you done that?"

His eyes met mine, green meeting blue, and responded, "Every night since you've been here."

I flushed, startled, and looked down at my hands. I was intensely aware of the fact that I still had several healing bruises, and my hair had not been brushed since this morning. "Why haven't you come to see me during the day – "

"Why did you do it?"

I instantly looked up at him, confused. "What are you talking about?" I asked.

"Why did you take the bullet for Isaac, when he could've healed? Why did you do it?"

His stare was intense, turning my insides out again. I had forgotten how easily he could do that. "You're not going to like the answer," I responded, chewing on my bottom lip. When he didn't respond, and only kept watching me, I sighed and said, "When we were in that moment, I wasn't thinking about werewolves, or kanimas, or anything supernatural. I just saw a gun and reacted and thought of how I needed to make sure Isaac was safe – I know, it's stupid."

"It was stupid," he agreed, his voice slightly accusing. "It was reckless, and dangerous."

"You think I don't know that?" I snapped, temper rising. "I already told you, you aren't going to like the answer. It was a gut instinct."

He didn't say anything, only shook his head and turned away. Fine, I thought, time for my own question. "Were you the one who brought White to the police station?"

At first, he didn't say anything. Finally, he responded, "I had to see him for myself before he was taken away."

I remembered the details Uncle Jake had told me about White's injuries when he had shown up at the police station – all of the broken bones, the bruises, the deep gashes in one of his sides. I didn't feel any pity for the man – on the contrary, I felt a sick satisfaction that he had been put through so much pain. And, as I looked at Derek, I had a feeling that I wasn't the only one.

"Why haven't you come to see me, Derek? Not sneaking around during the night – why haven't you come to actually see and talk to me?"

His shoulders stiffened, his gaze slowly turning back to me. "Because I was scared of what I would do when I saw you looking back at me," he said simply.

Furrowing my brow, I started to ask what he meant, when he interrupted me.

"When Isaac and I were looking for you," he began, "we found your car. It was on fire; it had clearly been burning for a while. When I saw that…I thought I'd lost you. Isaac had to drag me away from the car. Then, the police came and I was sitting there thinking…how could I have left you that morning, without even saying goodbye, without telling you…how I feel."

His eyes met mine, and my heart was pounding hard in my chest. "I kept thinking about waking up the next day, and the day after, in a world without you in it. I…I couldn't do it, Jane. I can't do it. Those months that we didn't talk…it killed me, just as much as it killed you. I don't know how many times that I drove by your grandparents' house, then your apartment when you moved, and just wanted to knock on the door and see your face, to hold your hands – " He leaned forward in his chair and took one of my hands in his, calloused fingers holding me tight as he lightly brushed his lips to my knuckles – "to hear your laugh. But I did, knowing that you were okay, that you were safe. But then, with you gone, and knowing that I could never do those things again…"

Tears were steaming down my cheeks, but I couldn't even bring myself to reach my other hand up to wipe them away. I kept watching him, soaking in his words, my heart in my throat. I had never heard such raw emotion in his voice before, never seen the tears shining in his own eyes.

"I love you, Jane," he told me, and I took a shuddery, wet breath, my heart nearly bursting in my chest. "I love you so goddamn much, and I need you. I will do whatever it takes to be with you, even if it means giving up being an alpha, even if it means giving up everything that I have worked for. Because none of it…none of it matters without you there with me.

"I know that you didn't want to be with me, didn't want to put your family at risk—"

I stopped him, cupping his cheek in my shaky hand. "Derek," I said, "I thought I was never going to see you again, when I was sitting in that basement. I thought of my own life, of never being able to see you again, and I don't want that. I can't live without you. I love you so much, Derek, and I don't want to waste my time here, not being with the man I love. I—"

He interrupted me this time by holding my face in his hands and kissing me fiercely, my tears dampening his cheeks, but he didn't seem to mind. I wrapped my arms around his neck, ignoring the discomfort in my shoulder for as long as I could—all I wanted was to have him closer to me, as close I could in a cramped hospital bed—and deepened the kiss, until I had to pull away with a pained gasp. He gave me an alarmed glance, but I shook my head.

"I don't want to screw this up, Derek," I whispered, gently pulling away from him. "I can't lose the best thing to ever happen to me—"

"You won't," he replied earnestly. He kissed me again, this time softly, so tenderly, as if he thought I was going to shatter under his touch. "I'm never losing you, never again."

And there's the scene that I have been so excited to write for all these years. Please let me know what you think with your reviews, they are so helpful!