That spectator had watched Legolas and her, Tarisilya realized only belatedly.
Light-footed, she ran up the stairs, with her cheeks still flushed, her breath going too fast, her heart racing from more than the quick exercise. She jumped up the steps like an elfling, unable to stop running. If she did, all those feelings inside of her, the excitement, the happiness, the anticipation of a new life, would surely make her burst into a thousand pieces.
Her thoughts were a wild mess, failing to focus on a particular memory. Could there be anything better than having someone whisper words of love in your ear? Than hearing the raw honesty in a beautiful warm voice with every syllable, every single nuance?
In her enthusiasm, she nearly ran past her guesthouse. She'd probably not calm down before she would lay in her bed, recalling every single second of the evening. The firm hugs, the gentle touch on her lips …
Freezing, Tarisilya nearly stumbled when she turned around to hurry to the right door and saw a tall, very slender figure standing there. One that in spite of the bad lighting, she recognized immediately. "What are you doing here?"
Erestor didn't answer. Bewilderment and the pained realization of a battle ultimately lost marked his face.
Maybe Tarisilya should have chosen a less public place for Legolas' and her conversation. "I'm tired, so if you have nothing to say to me …"
He didn't even seem to hear her. "This is him, Ilya? Him of all people? Are you so desperate to die unhappy?"
"Get out of my way." Tiredly crossing her arms, Tarisilya did her best to ignore Erestor's honest concern. Listening to Tegiend's admonitions for a thousand years had been bad enough. Unhappy? Not what she had been until a few seconds ago. And now another elf tried to convince her that she had chosen the wrong partner. She was sick of it.
Erestor grabbed her lower arms so tightly it nearly hurt. "I can't just watch you destroy yourself; you're too important for me."
"That's my decision, why can't you get that in your head?" She fiercely broke away. Erestor had nearly led her astray back then, because he had been the first elf ever to not restrict her freedom. Did he honestly think to make anything better if he turned into the very opposite now?
"Decision." Snorting, he crossed his arms as well, in a defensive attitude giving Tarisilya hope that he was about to find some distance to the whole thing. As awful as it was, maybe arguing with her would help him. "You would do anything to rebel against the whole world, and he is probably the only Mirkwood elf with the audacity to marry someone from Lórien. That's not a decision, it's a lack of option."
"So that's how you see me." Shaking her head, she went past him to get to the door where Tegiend fortunately was waiting, wide awake, fully dressed in spite of the late hour and ready to personally show Erestor that he wasn't welcome if need be.
"Was anything real that you showed me back then? Or did you always think me the naive little elf you could play with? If you're so unwilling to at least keep our friendship, fine, have it your way."
"Friends is what you will be needing very soon, if you commit to a life of loneliness," Erestor hissed. Tarisilya knew him well enough to hear that it was mostly anger on himself and on his rash actions filling him. But she would probably long be on her way back to Lórien before he would accept that.
She had seldom been so relieved to close a door behind her.
While Tarisilya and Tegiend weren't in a hurry to get home and would stay in Imladris for a few more days, Legolas was expected back in Mirkwood already. Therefore, he reluctantly got his horse from the palace paddock early the next morning already. He was surprised to spot two horses standing among Lord Elrond's many animals that were seldom seen outside of Rohan. Much less if they had a deep black color basically believed to no longer be occurring in this race. Mearas, a mighty battle steed and a mare looking similar enough to him to know, it was his sister.
"Is there something you kept from me?" he curiously asked when Tarisilya joined him at the fence.
"Lady Galadriel was given them as a gift. By whom and under which circumstance, she never told us. They were foals back then. They are twins," she smiled, bashfully. "It's my fate to constantly be reminded where I come from. Tegiend and me raised them on the bottle, which is probably the only reason why they accept us on their back. They usually only carry descendants of noble houses as you probably know."
"Maybe they knew something, the two of us had to find in our hearts first," Legolas speculated with a wink.
"Unlikely, unless you have a secret brother or sister to marry Tegiend off to," Tarisilya replied in the same tone. "And they would have to get past Haldir first. Provided he'll finally get that in his thick head."
Legolas only arched an eyebrow, not commenting on the innuendo. Same sex love was a little rarer for elven folk than relationships blessed with children in a natural way. But not even Legolas' father was narrow-minded enough to get hung up on certain social conventions. At least in this regard, he had instilled Legolas with the same natural acceptance that Vandrin had obviously provided Tarisilya and her brother with.
"Regardless how it came to pass ... If she accepts you as her master, this indeed is a very precious gift that you will be enjoying for a very long time."
"Yes." Tarisilya lovingly nestled up to her mare's side. The horse seemed to sense exactly when people were talking about it and rubbed its head against Tarisilya's back. "I rode many horses in my life, but Manyala is the most important one since I had to witness Mawëra's last breath. She has the fastest legs in Middle-earth."
"I want proof for that someday, I hope you know that." Legolas patted the neck of his stallion who bristled unwillingly, as if he had understood and wanted to prove Tarisilya wrong immediately.
"No long good-bye this time, Ilya. I'll be seeing you soon. I will come to get you on our clearing as soon as my father can do without me next for a few hours."
"I will be there." She tried to sound just as optimistic, though it was obvious how much she wanted to go with him and tell his father a few things about stubbornness even rivaling a dwarf's.
"I hate to interrupt, but it's time to leave." An auburn stallion came up next to the paddock. His rider was wearing the versatile, robust leather clothing of a Dúnedan and was armed as if he was going to war. "Ada said, it's urgent. Are you ready?"
"Have you been drinking, Estel?" As long as Legolas had to doubt the young man's sanity, he wasn't ready to speak more with him than necessary.
"Ada didn't tell you?" Estel pulled back his hood, revealing confusion on his suntanned face. "I'm supposed to deliver a message to King Thranduil. We're traveling together."
"He surely has his reasons." Tarisilya tried to calm Legolas down before the anger even reached his eyes, about not even having been informed, and especially about Elrond obviously not deeming him capable of bringing some kind of message to Thranduil himself anymore. "Don't fret. This is a good opportunity, isn't it?"
"For what? To lose the last of my nerves?" But since Legolas didn't have a say in Elrond's decisions, he surrendered to his fate.
earth everywhere. That he was aware of that, spoke for him.
His condescending tone infuriated Legolas though. His serenity admittedly left much to be desired since deadly threats were waiting around every single corner of his home. "You don't seem to realize whom you're dealing with."
"Oh, I do. In fact, I'm afraid I already know you pretty well, your highness," Estel replied coolly. "Which is why I doubt, you will do me the favor and just keep your mouth shut. Correct?"
Riding out ahead, Legolas turned, cutting Estel off so sharply that his horse startled and balked. "Stop assuming a right to judge things, you have no idea about. If you should one day seek the help other elven realms for whatever fate plans for you, you better watch your mouth. Oh, and: Me, I am the friendly member of my family."
His immensely likable conversation partner surely had a similarly eloquent reply on his lips, but Legolas silenced him with a sharp gesture of his hand.
At least for a moment. "You're going too far …"
"Silence!" Legolas left the man a few steps behind to lock out all sensations around him, even Estel's quick heartbeat and his heavy breathing – maybe he should be smoking less.
He hoped that the noise he'd noticed would fade away. That whoever was close by wasn't after them. Instead, the sneaking steps came closer. 15 men.
"We need to leave this path." Legolas had had too many bad experiences with limited space in battle. They were caught in a trap. And leaving the horses behind to go through the undergrowth would make them even more vulnerable. "Don't ask any questions, just come with me." No matter how little he cared for the man right now, Lord Elrond had entrusted him in Legolas' care. He couldn't let anything happen to him.
"Useless. There's only the path we came from, these people know that. They'll have men there. We better prepare for battle. You're not the only one who has good hearing, your highness." Estel showed hint of a smile before he took off the cloak protecting him from the cool temperatures, to be able to move better. "My father says, your strengths do not lie in close combat."
"Your father never went to battle with me." They were already at the point again where yelling at each other became likely. "You're the one missing centuries of experience, so try not to get yourself killed."
Again a grin, bordering on mocking this time. "If you say so."
They didn't let it show that they knew what was upon them, hoping to surprise their enemies. Legolas did his best to block out the feelings raging in him enough to not get distracted from the vital focus on his senses. He didn't fully manage, the last days had been too disturbing. But there were few noises he was as familiar with as with the crunch of a badly wired bowstring. "Archers in red clothing south and west of us. Dismount."
"Haradrim," Estel murmured, too alarmed for disobedience. "What are they doing so far up here? Maybe a group that split off from their tribe, or they are scouts."
"If they are headed for Imladris, the others need to be warned," Legolas realized as well, frightened.
Conflicts among Men which as far as Legolas knew, no side ever entered fully innocently, did actually rarely concern elves in this age. Legolas had always been advised by his father to keep out of them. So far, he'd fared well with that. There were enough petty quarrels in elven lands keeping him on his toes. Now, those crises of Secondborn raging ever worse recently, seemed to have found him anyway.
He couldn't form another reply. The first arrow ricocheted on the saddle of Estel's horse.
They drew their weapons.
Lord Elrond probably felt how sad Tarisilya was after saying good-bye to Legolas. She couldn't think of another reason for him to invite Tegiend and her to breakfast at his private chambers immediately when she came back to the guesthouse. Being with friends in a private atmosphere was just what she needed to distract herself from the longing already burning in her soul.
Unfortunately, she had forgotten the Lord's sometimes unconventional definition of privacy. And how many people fit on that balcony where he usually held such meetings.
It was too late to turn around when Tegiend led Tarisilya outside to the large marble terrace and she spotted Erestor at the long dining table. She did her best to smile, greeting the Lord, his sons and Arwen and shortly nodding at Erestor, then she sat down next to her brother, trying her best to not listen to anything. She definitely preferred daydreaming about Legolas to another debate with Erestor.
Fortunately, the others respected her quietness, though Tarisilya noticed especially the twins keeping on looking her way.
That, she ignored as well. Her plate, she hardly touched. For some reason, she was unable to get lost in beautiful visions. The question kept on spinning in her mind, what Lady Galadriel would say about this relationship, now that it was finally permanent. And even more important – how would Legolas' father react if he learned about it one day? The long secrecy would hardly help winning him over. Whenever she tried to calm herself with memories of last night, the hurtful argument with Erestor flared up inside her head. Or Tegiend's warning that she was hurling herself into something without a future. Suddenly the same melancholy took hold of her that had tortured her in the worst years of the parting, when she had missed Legolas so much that it had almost hurt physically.
At some point, she just couldn't stay on her chair. She went to stand at the terrace railing, her eyes fixed on the paddocks. Something wasn't right here, was it? Such inner unrest for no reason, coming out of nowhere, that definitely wasn't normal.
What if something had happened to Legolas? Was that even possible, so close to Imladris? And what should that be? He could handle orc attacks, Tarisilya had witnessed that. Who else would have a reason to attack elves, beings who were about to leave this world anyway?
It was getting worse by the minute. Hadn't Tarisilya yesterday detected once again that she could indeed see the ones she loved in her head? Where last night warmth and satisfaction had filled her, there was nothing but ice-cold silence now. And it had nothing to do with Legolas' or her feelings, she would have known that at their farewell. Nothing had changed between them. So …
"Milord, I …" She started to talk before she even realized she would, and paused immediately. How did you explain a thing like that? "I think, Legolas and Estel are in trouble."
Erestor let out an amused, snidely snort; the twins exchanged puzzled glances.
Tegiend at least had the decency to ask. After all, he had experienced it before, that Tarisilya often had good instincts, though it had never been about something so specific before. "Do you feel anything?"
"I'm not sure …" She clenched the railing, looking at him pleadingly. If Lord Elrond didn't believe her, Tegiend was her only hope to find out what was going on. She didn't trust herself with that, not in these dangerous times and not in the light of her meek fighting abilities, which mostly consisted of not missing a target completely. "Someone should ride after them, to go sure …"
"Because of a hysterical elf?" Erestor chimed in before someone could answer.
"Stay out of this!" With her fists clenched, Tarisilya turned to him. Was this some miserable attempt of revenge for not behaving the way Erestor wanted her to?
No, of course she didn't have a real idea what had happened; such feelings and intuitions had always been too vague so far.
Besides, Legolas wasn't being alone. It was very well possible that Estel would come back with him in a little while. After all, Arwen's partner was an accomplished warrior himself. But this was not about just anyone.
She turned back to Lord Elrond to explain herself, but Erestor didn't give her a chance to. For the first time, Tarisilya witnessed how he was probably acting in his role as advisor, how ruthlessly he tried to enforce his opinion. Talking to her, he had always held back. Now that he was sure that nothing would ever happen between them, he finally dropped the mask.
"This whole area has been teeming with orcs for years." He addressed Lord Elrond as if Tarisilya wasn't even there. "We can't send out soldiers just because someone is lovesick."
For seconds, the silence was absolute; even Elrond's usually very talkative sons were speechless. Arwen looked like she wanted to punch Erestor in the face.
Although no one said it out loud, everyone being aware of possible consequences, at least in this family everyone knew exactly what had happened between two close friends last night. A teasing smile of Elladan or Elrohir had so far been the most bothersome thing, Tarisilya had been confronted with. The prospect of a connection and thereby a conciliation of two estranged elven realms was a lovely one to her friends in this valley, nothing to be talked about so unfavorably.
"That's none of your business," Tegiend snarled at Erestor. In one regard, he wasn't unlike Elrond's advisor, not unlike his captain as well: If need be, he forgot all respect for ranks and titles. "Altogether, for how long have you known my sister? A few weeks? I spent a millennium with her. She knows what she's talking about when she sees something."
Erestor wasn't someone to be easily muzzled though. "All I am seeing here is an immature, impulsive, naive and – forgive the expression – uncouth little Princess who has been told too often that she's something special. In her place, who wouldn't get delusional at some point? You think you're Lady Galadriel now, Ilya? What are you basing your claims on? Do you still hear the voice of the moon?"
"That's enough!" Elladan barged in because his father was still not saying a word, only looked back and forth at Tarisilya and Erestor, a deep wrinkle between his brows.
"Indeed it is." Tarisilya approached Erestor with her hands on her hips. Not only he admitted after all this time how he really saw her, that he had never taken her half as seriously as she had thought. He also tried to to turn her abilities into ridicule. And that brought someone into danger of whom Tarisilya knew deep inside, surer with every passing second, that he needed help.
"If you're unable to be objective when it comes to me, stay out of my affairs. I couldn't care less that you're being jealous. I will not let you ruin my life just because you want to see Legolas dead."
"Ilya!" Tegiend gasped for air and looked at Elrond apologetically. Now the fight was really getting ugly, they both didn't take any nonsense anymore. And worst of all, this wasn't getting them anywhere.
Erestor's usually so blank face was a grimace of anger. The last accusation had hit him deeply. "Watch your mouth, Vandriniel. Your exuberant emotions for that elf have obviously clouded your mind. I'm worried about the safety of my valley, that's all."
"As far as I know, this is still my valley." Lord Elrond put his rebellious advisor into place with a single sentence.
"Call in a few soldiers. Arwen, if you want to go with them, get ready. And get Thondrar."
"Thondrar?" Relieved, Tarisilya slumped back on her chair, doing her best to rein in her impatience.
There was still time. She was sure about that at least. If Legolas … She didn't even want to think that, but that she would have felt.
She had witnessed it often enough, how capable Lord Elrond's soldiers were. And with Arwen joining them … They would find him in time, they just had to.
The name of the elf in command on this quest she had heard before. Thondrar was known as one of Imladris' best warriors. Besides, she had fond memories of the close-lipped, likable elf from that one ride to Lórien back then.
Nevertheless, she would have preferred Glorfindel being in on this.
Although Legolas was always keeping out of the biggest battles, was a very skilled fighter. In almost none of the books about violent conflicts that Tarisilya had studied in the last centuries, were there any entries about his father or him. Since the last big war, they were mostly busy with defending their realm, and Legolas was known far beyond its borders for his excellent performance at that duty. He knew how to defend himself. If something had befallen him, while being in the company of another experienced fighter like Estel no less, that could only mean big trouble.
Tarisilya hoped that her slight discontent didn't show when she asked where Glorfindel was. She had already missed his optimism and his captivating singing voice at the celebration.
"Travelling. He needs a few weeks for himself. Parties this big aren't to his liking," Elrond answered with a short smile. "Don't worry, child of the moon. Thondrar is one the people he trusts most. He trained him in his very own image. And Arwen has learned much from Lord Glorfindel too since coming back to Imladris."
"I trust your decisions, milord." Embarrassed, Tarisilya lowered her head. But the worry wouldn't go away.
Legolas needed her, she just knew it. She should accompany the soldiers. Unfortunately, she knew Elrond's attitude towards that. Tegiend, who was staying to support her, would never allow it either. Tarisilya was simply missing any experience of seriously defending herself.
"You need to learn how to hide your feelings." Elrond seemed to know her thoughts once again. "Your mother was like this too. Sincerity helps coming up to people, but it also gives advantage to enemies."
"I'll remember that." Enemies? What kind of enemies? Tarisilya couldn't help but wonder if he was talking about Erestor who had left by now, fuming mad.
"Thondrar is the hunter among us." Elrond pointed at the yard where Arwen was just returning, clad in riding clothes now, wearing a slim blade on her belt. With her came a very tall elf who hid his agile figure under a large cloak, the attached hood low over his face.
"For possibly conducting a healing, my sons will be present. Did you think they're not coming along?"
Embarrassed, Tarisilya looked away. In spite of all disagreements in the past, Elrond appreciated her brother and her way too much to disappoint them.
Trying to distract herself, she examined Thondrar closely. "Doesn't he ever take that thing off?"
"Seldom." Elrond usually wasn't avoiding conversations but suddenly, he turned reticent. He might respect Thondrar, but something was going wrong between them. To notice that, Tarisilya didn't need to be a visionary.
It wasn't any of her business, but right now she welcomed anything to take her mind off things. "Who is he?"
"No one knows. Thondrar never reveals anything about his past, so don't bother trying." The Lord's tone of voice made it clear that asking again was useless.
"I need to go see the soldiers. Don't worry. If something did happen, we will soon know. And if not, the guards have at least a good training. None of the soldiers will complain about that." Elrond stopped next to Tarisilya's chair to quickly touch her shoulder when she regarded him with deep gratefulness. "I knew your mother, child of the moon. I know what you are, what she was. I would be foolish not to send someone to look at least. After all, my foster son is out there as well."
"Thank you."
Tarisilya was very relieved that this time, Tegiend supported her all the way. And that Arwen was volunteering to go to battle so naturally, although strictly speaking, Tarisilya had left her alone after her mother's departure for the west. With both of them fearing for someone close to them, that didn't matter.
Once more, she was the one who had to stay behind. She wondered if she would ever get used to it.
The room was in utter darkness when Legolas opened his eyes. Before anything else reached his conscious mind - like his right side turning into a flaming ocean of pain and deafening silence all around, or the memory of what had happened -, panic about the lack of even a single ray of light was choking him already. Getting frantic, he raised his hand to his head to find out whether an injury was responsible, something that could be healed, or maybe just a blindfold that he didn't feel ...
"Stop moving. There's nothing wrong with your eyes. We're deeply underground."
Estel. Right. The Haradrim … But hadn't that battle be as good as won?
A sword, right, suddenly, there had been a sword ... One, Legolas had only seen from the corner of his eyes. Not Estel's surprisingly skillful blade, but one belonging to an enemy believed dead already … A warning shout … Naked metal on his back, on his side, striking out before he could get out of reach. Or even curse himself for stopping to wear armor a while ago, because he usually could rely on his skills in battle.
And then? He remembered the survivors concentrating all their forces on attacking Estel ... Their sadistic laughter in the certainty of triumph ... Faces of Men that Legolas had rarely encountered before, so very dark in their aura … This was where the images of these people's scarlet red clothes in his head blurred with the blood soaking his own and then faded completely.
"Why did they leave me alive?"
"They want us to die slowly, here, in this chamber. The air is already getting thin. Many Haradrim can only bear their unbridled hatred by taking it out on others. Whatever problem they have with my father, they're trying to demonstrate that Imladris is in trouble."
At least Legolas' other senses were fully functional. He could hear Estel stand up, his tunic rustling against a moist stone wall before he approached. His walk didn't sound impaired so he probably wasn't gravely hurt. Legolas' sense of smell also told him that they must be trapped here for more than a few hours already. It was a miracle, he was still breathing.
"Seriously, stop moving. I just had that bleeding under control. It's bursting open again." Estel's choice of words as well as his tone of voice had changed considerably. Instead of fear, it held deep worry. When he tightened the coarse fabric of the makeshift bandage, the air faintly smelled of some healing herbs.
So that was why. The Dúnedain and Lord Elrond had taught the young man well. "You always have that kind of stuff on you, in case you get taken prisoner?" His throat felt dry but not sore, and no cough yet, so the lung probably wasn't compromised. But Legolas had seen that blade emerge from his torso and knew how much blood he must have lost. If he survived this, he would not utter a wrong word about Dúnedain ever again.
"These things you learn early on when you lead a life like me." Finished with his short examination, Estel straightened up. His stiff movements let Legolas know that the temperatures in here left only an elf uneffected. The man trembled audibly and suppressed a cough more than once. The way he'd just favored his right arm indicated, he hadn't come out of the battle unscathed after all. Somehow, that was a comfort.
"In Imladris, you seemed to have learned nothing, though you have lived there for so long." The argument from earlier was forgotten. "Take my cloak or I'll put it on you myself, open wound or not. Elves are hardly affected by coldness."
"You mean well but I'm afraid that won't make a difference." Nevertheless, Estel followed the order, to avoid unnecessary discussions alone, then retreated to the opposite wall again. "Like I said: The air is already thin, and the doors are unbreakable. It is unlikely that we'll be found in time, especially since no one is looking for us. Not a day has passed since were attacked. Not even your father will be suspicious."
Only now, Legolas started to understand. Fever and infection causing growing dizziness, and having trouble to concentrate on the conversation, so far had kept him from hearing what his heart wasn't ready to accept. Not two days after he had finally started his life with Tarisilya. Estel's blunt words now had him shiver as well, not from the cold though.
They would suffocate in this room.