Author's Note:

Are you there, B.A.R.F.? It's me, MJ.

Don't skip the announcement in the endnotes!

XXI

MJ was doing great. Just fine. She wasn't at all paranoid that people might be looking at her and thinking that girl's boyfriend is building her a kink machine. She always carried the thought of Peter with her, every day. When someone talked over her or bumped her on the bus without apologizing, she'd gleefully imagine telling them Peter Parker―yeah, the accused murderer and all-around badass―was madly in love with her and prepared to break bones at her whim. When she overheard people complaining about some lousy date they'd been on or the latest demonstration of their partner's disinterest, she'd remember how Peter brought her dahlias on her birthday and never sounded like he was saying he loved her out of weary obligation. Their relationship was the fucking best, including the fact that he was repurposing simulation tech to further enhance their sex life. So romantic! That knowledge just made her feel transparent, walking around like a normal person. If anyone knew! Then again, she'd gotten pretty damn good at keeping secrets. And it wasn't like she couldn't think about what Peter was doing and, beyond that, look forward to the day it'd be finished and they could put it to use together, she simply had to save those thoughts for the right time and place.

God, she'd been so much better at self-control before this whole falling in love thing.

At least Happy was watching her back. He was a great ally inside the compound because, though MJ couldn't be sure, she had the feeling that he would be throwing the people Peter's plan would most freak out off the scent. Namely, May and Tony. Happy could never be completely in the loop, but MJ knew he was loyal. She'd observed him second-hand for a good long while before they ever spoke and, after the way he was there for Peter in Europe, she decided Happy had earned her full approval. Kinda cool that he must have felt the same about her. He wouldn't have kept coming to her for help with May if he didn't.

If not for the two separate phones, MJ would've had to double- and triple-check who she was replying to last night. As it was, she'd placed the phones at opposite ends of her bedroom, forcing herself to sit on her bed to text Peter and stand by her closet to text Happy. Mixing up the conversations would've been disastrous. Happy did not need to know about Peter's extracurricular project and MJ was pretty sure Peter wouldn't want to be pulled into the middle of a discussion of Happy's feelings for his aunt. Separation was the key, MJ was finding. She'd never had so many friends or responsibilities in her life. If she was able to keep everything under control, things would have to work out. She would stare down the barrel of the universe and… and…

Crap, she was thinking about B.A.R.F. again. Seriously, the name should be enough to temper her desire, but the anticipation was too powerful. Did she wish Peter hadn't told her? Well, no. She would've realized he was hiding something and gotten it out of him. Even physically exiled and communicating through a spy-phone, he was transparent to her. The thought made MJ smile fondly as she made her way to the hospital's closest exit. An organization had brought therapy dogs into the paediatric ward today and she had to acknowledge that, between her and a big, wet-eyed, sweet-faced furball, any kid in there would prefer a visit from the latter. It didn't hurt. She was still within her volunteering hours, but while the dogs were making their rotations, her presence only made the rooms more crowded. She'd get some air and call Happy to check in. If those two things happened to repack B.A.R.F. into a tiny corner of her mind, it would certainly be convenient. MJ wasn't a therapy dog; she could serve her own interests while also lending Happy an ear.

How did dinner go? she texted. It was seconds before her phone vibrated with his incoming call.

"Hey, MJ, yeah, great, good, great, it went well."

"So… we're not just gonna text then."

"I mean, I think it went well," Happy rambled on. "Your encouragement beforehand really helped."

"Why do you sound like you're freaking out then?"

"I don't sound like I'm freaking out."

MJ frowned at that and strolled slightly away from the hospital to take shelter in the shade of a tree on its lawn.

"Why don't you think it went well?" she pressed. She was surprised to find Happy in worse shape than she'd hoped for.

"Aw, May was there, but I felt like she was distracted, you know? I think I'm losing ground with her. Like, the harder I try, the more distant she gets."

"Mm," MJ hummed in sympathy.

"Do you think I should back off? Ignore her until she comes to me?"

Her sympathy whooshed back out like a receding tide.

"Only a man would consider that a good plan."

"Which means I… shouldn't do that," he interpreted.

"If the woman in question wasn't my boyfriend's aunt and one of the coolest, sharpest, strongest women I know, I'd tell you to proceed and learn your lesson through dismal failure, but it's May. You can't do that to May, you moron."

"You know I'm trying to do this right! Calling me a moron isn't helping!"

"Sorry, habit. Blame Peter."

"I wish I could ask that moron for his input."

"Hey," MJ shot back, "only I get to call him that. He's my moron. Find your own."

"I'd be nicer if he'd give me a hand," Happy complained.

"Trust me, he's already giving you a hand by accepting that you're dating May."

"Some extra input wouldn't hurt."

"Are you going to gripe to me about not having enough help or are you actually going to let me help you, 'cause I have shit to do."

It was true. She could be cuddling a dog whose job it was to indiscriminately love everyone.

Happy sighed loudly into the phone.

"What do I do?"

"Stay the course, dude," MJ counselled. "Keep being there for May. She might not pick up on all the ways you're making her life better or easier, but if she doesn't, isn't it still worth it to make her life better and easier? You love her, right? Love isn't about instant gratification."

"Do you think anything I do really matters to her though?"

"I think she'd be in worse shape without you," she told him honestly. "She needs you right now, even if she doesn't say it. Maybe she's scared to recognize that. Stop her from worrying and fixating on all the terrible stuff when you can, but don't use those moments to pressure her into admitting her feelings for you. Let her come to you. It's May. She's more than capable."

"You're right. She has raised a pretty emotionally-available teenager."

"Mhmm. The nerd comes with a lot of other problems, but not being able to tell me he loves me isn't one of them."

"Yeah, he's even nice to that Flash kid."

"More like he tolerates Flash," she corrected.

"Whatever." Happy sounded distracted. No, no, no, MJ needed this cleared up.

"What do you know about Flash and how to do you know it?"

"Kid's in his online class, right? May was telling me." He laughed. "Sounds like Spider-Man has one loyal admirer."

"He has plenty of loyal admirers and if we were going to specifically select one, it would be me."

"…Are you ok?"

MJ groaned.

"I'm fine. Flash is a pain in the ass, that's all. It's normal. I wish I could just…" She trailed off, taking a deep breath as she crossed an arm over her chest, pacing in her patch of shade. "…tell people that Peter and I are still together."

"I guess you sort of have the opposite problem that May and I have. You look broken up from the outside, but on the inside, everything's fine. Sort of. The murder thing's a bummer."

"Yeah… Wait, I was supposed to be giving you a pep talk."

"You don't know everything," Happy said kindly. "And I might be a decade or two older than you are―"

"Or three or four."

"―but I don't know nothing."

"You don't know nothing?" she parroted dryly.

His heavy sigh made her smirk.

"I know some things based on years of experience."

"So, what do I do about Flash?"

"What, you want me to deploy a drone and shake him up a little?"

"How are your ideas for problem-solving the same as Peter's?" MJ asked in exasperation.

"The difference is that I throw them out there for fun, whereas your moron actually executes them."

She shrugged.

"He's a work in progress."

"Ok," Happy said suddenly, "I gotta go. Apparently, we're drop-testing car seats from the roof."

"Only the roof? Tony has like a zillion Iron Man suits. He could drop them from the lower atmosphere if he felt like it. The roof is the best he can do?"

"It's, uh, supposed to be a compromise. Tony, WAIT FOR ME! YOU SAID YOU WOULD― Well, I better go. Don't murder that Flash kid. Agree to that."

"Fine."

"We know how difficult it is to deal with a staged homicide. I don't want to have to help you if you actually kill someone."

"Aww, you'd help me if I killed someone?"

"That is not even a little bit funny," Happy warned. "Gotta go!"

MJ laughed when he hung up, then went back into the hospital.

Though she thought she was definitely going to need a break after all this, there were already less than three weeks left before school resumed. In another week, she'd be tapering off her volunteer hours―a plan she'd agreed on with her mom, so that MJ would have a couple weeks of downtime before September. June had felt bad about not planning a vacation this summer. With everything going on, MJ couldn't imagine having gone on one. Besides, she'd kinda had enough vacation for a while after Quentin Beck took the reins on Midtown's Eurotrip. Life at home this summer might have been chaotic in a different way, but it was nothing she could've dealt with by throwing a swimsuit into a suitcase and running away. She'd just have to pressure Stark into flying them to Paris for Thanksgiving or something. She probably wouldn't even have to plead that hard, since he loved showing off, and Pepper's third trimester would have him distracted enough to give in to anything else, just to make it go away.

Inside, she sketched the kids as they pet the dogs, or sketched the kids as they told her about the dogs, if their hallway's therapy animal had already been by. They were capable of such a massive amount of joy―the children, not the dogs―and it was good for MJ, helping her put her own worries in perspective. Peter would be beyond suspicion before school started again, they would enter senior year together, and the rest would be easy. If he chose to deny Beck's claim that he was Spider-Man, that would be resolved and they would be the same pair of decathlon nerds they'd always been. If he acknowledged the formerly-secret identity, the world would accept that and she'd do her best to keep Peter grounded. Like maybe performing excessive eye-rolling if anybody at school tried to get his autograph. But she knew how these things went, even when heroes went the transparency route, like Tony Stark. It'd be a big deal at first, but with all the crazy shit that happened in and to this city, people would quickly move on. Brad had called Beck's revelation a bombshell and he was right. The shock of the information and the way in which it had been exposed, with maximum drama by J. Jonah Jameson, would ensure that Peter's confirmation (or denial―she supported him either way) was far less earth-shattering in comparison. By the winter holidays, even, things would be pretty much back to normal. Which for them, she supposed, meant Peter ducking out on present-buying or the family dinner she was already planning to invite him to, catching some bad guys, and reappearing dishevelled but smiling.

Next summer, she'd be ready for standard holiday things like touring out-of-state museums and road-tripping to the beach. Some of that she'd do with her mom, who definitely deserved a vacation, but other excursions would be for her and Peter and Betty and Ned and Cindy. Maybe Cindy would have a girlfriend then and she'd come too. A few things, though, would just be for MJ and Peter. Their last summer before college. Would they be applying to the same places this year? Would they receive twin acceptance letters? Would they live on different floors of the same dorm and then, in second year, move into an apartment together? God, this version of the future scared her almost as much as one where this current summer ended with Peter being thrown in jail for murder. She pressed her pencil to the paper and refocused her attention to right then and no time beyond it.

...But would they be inviting Flash to the beach with them?

Flash shouldn't have seemed like the biggest issue they'd face once they were openly together again. MJ knew that. Still, she wondered how the guy would react and if he'd be a total drag at decathlon practice. He already called Peter "Penis" and it wasn't hard to think up a name he might adopt for her. Mich-go-to-hell maybe. She and Peter had ended the last school year with Brad trying to weasel his way between them; would they be starting the next one with Flash taking up Brad's mantle as a meddling asshole? She sighed and attempted to make the dog she was sketching look even happier. The trouble with Flash was that he wasn't a problem that fixed itself―you kinda had to force him to back off. MJ just wasn't sure how to do that when she couldn't straight-up tell him that Peter Parker was not available. Maybe, if she saw him face to face, something would come to her.

She left the hospital in the early afternoon, baseball cap-disguise on, and―after letting her mom know she wouldn't be going straight home―texted Flash.

Are you home?

Wherever he was, MJ knew he wasn't busy because he started typing almost immediately.

Of course not, Flash replied. It's the middle of August. You think I'd hang around the city with you peasants? I'm on a luxury cruise.

What a dick. She wasn't giving up quite yet though.

Prove it.

I'm in the middle of a hot stone massage!

I'll give you exactly one minute to find your robe and send me a picture proving you're on a boat.

Please, Michelle, it's a ship, not a boat. Guess I shouldn't have expected you to know that.

42 seconds...

She waited for his response now, smirking, and in the meantime, made her way to the building that housed the Thompsons' penthouse apartment. Flash had bragged about it enough for her to remember without needing to check his contact info for the address.

His 'proof' arrived and MJ squinted at the picture. Rolling her eyes, she texted back.

You're standing in front of a Jaws poster.

That's the Caribbean Sea!

I can see the girl's legs sticking out beside your head.

After being called out, it took Flash more than ten minutes to respond. Sulking, she assumed.

Fine, he finally said. I'm at Chez Thompson. What do you want?

To come over. And I'm almost there so don't run away or pretend you're not home.

Screw you.

Yeah, I've missed you too. You better let me in.

And he did, when she arrived. Or someone did, anyway, and MJ took the elevator up to the top of the building. She felt a little self-conscious about her 'Eat the Rich' t-shirt, but that couldn't be helped now. Flash was in a bad mood regardless; that's what she gathered rereading his texts on the way up. Could be that he was sour over Peter not flirting back. If that was the case, he wouldn't be getting any sympathy from her. She planned to proceed with caution. She couldn't afford to let Flash get on her nerves and cause her to blurt out something about how, despite all outward appearances, she was still with Peter. Don't let him provoke you, she thought to herself as she exited onto the top floor.

"I was supposed to be on that cruise," was the first thing Flash told her. "There was some confusion at the last minute about the number of tickets."

"Number of tickets?" she asked, following him into a massive, gleaming kitchen to sit on a stool at the island.

"Mother and Father are on the ship." He stuttered when he met her eye. "They, they had already purchased their tickets and it would have been a waste to―"

"Sure," she agreed. She couldn't go into this feeling bad for Flash, with parents who treated him as an afterthought.

"Anyway, it worked out for the best. I've had space to enjoy my own pursuits."

"Like summer school?"

He glared at her. He'd been on his way to the stainless-steel fridge (to offer her something to drink?), but he turned back. Unlike MJ, Flash lacked the restraint to give noncommittal answers until he'd determined the objective of the question.

"How do you know I'm doing summer school?"

Oh shit. She'd felt so superior for a minute, having sprung that on him, but she couldn't say she knew because Peter had told her. He hadn't found out that Flash was in his online class until his exile was already underway. They'd been 'broken up' by then. Fortunately, she remembered something else.

"Uh, Ned was added to your class by accident. He said he saw your name."

"Oh yeah, I've seen him on there."

Relaxing slightly, Flash got her a glass of something bright red and carbonated. This was how he did manners: bringing you a drink without asking what you actually wanted. MJ gave it a tentative sip as Flash pulled out the stool next to her. Tasted like raspberries. If he had any clue that she was still dating Peter, it probably would've smelled like bitter almonds, right before the cyanide had her collapsing on the shining tiles of this million-dollar kitchen. (She'd been rereading Agatha Christie novels on the bus lately.)

"So, have you talked to him?" she asked, glancing sideways at her host.

"Ned? No. I have other concerns," Flash airily informed her.

"Like getting a good grade, I guess."

He nodded, but she could feel the tension. It was obvious that he wanted to brag about getting to talk to Peter whenever he wanted and how the two of them were getting super close now and how Peter didn't even mention MJ and obviously didn't miss her. Fuck, she was making herself mad just imagining this stuff. It was less than a minute before Flash cracked.

"Spider-Man's in my class," he suddenly announced.

MJ was sure her surprised face was unconvincing, but Flash seemed to care more about what he had to tell her than how she would react.

"Huh."

"Peter Parker."

"You believe that he's Spider-Man then?" MJ checked.

"It's super obvious. There's a ton of evidence on the internet."

She closed her eyes for a second. She didn't want to know what kind of bullshit Flash had been reading. Probably exactly the material she'd been avoiding from the beginning, sticking to the defense of Peter coming out of the Avengers compound.

"Right," she said flatly.

"You can't tell anybody I said this, in case Peter turns out to be a murderer, but I'm on his side and I think you're a piece of shit for dumping him because he's a superhero."

"What? I didn't dump him because he's a superhero."

"That's basically what he told me," Flash insisted. "That it wouldn't have been safe for the two of you to be together or something. You're such a coward."

MJ jerked back and now she was the one glaring.

"Oh, like you were running towards danger to save Spider-Man's ass in London? You don't know anything about our relationship."

"Your former relationship," Flash muttered, taking a sip of his own drink.

"Ugh!"

Normally, she wasn't one for dramatics, but he was winding her up exactly the way she'd feared and it would be better if she uncharacteristically stormed off than stayed and ruined everything by revealing her and Peter's secret. She shoved away from the island and hopped down from the stool.

"You should've been nicer to him!"

"Me? You've called him 'Penis' for years!" MJ shot back, striding away from him.

"That's behind us now!"

"If you genuinely cared about him, you wouldn't be trying to take advantage of his loneliness!"

"What makes you think he's lonely?"

"My knowledge of current events!" she shouted in exasperation. "His face is everywhere, he's in hiding, and the only normal thing in his life is summer school! Um, apparently. And, not to be arrogant, he definitely still misses me! If you've reformed from calling him 'Penis,' that's great, but try being his fucking friend for once!"

MJ slammed the door on her way out and made it all the way back home without figuring out who, exactly, she was actually mad at.

Author's Note:

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: There will not be a new chapter of Boyfri(endgame) next week. I'm participating in Spideychelle Week and will be posting one-shots every day from June 21st - 27th. The next update of Boyfri(endgame) will be two weeks from today!

In that chapter, we'll have June, we'll have Cindy, we'll have... a phone call from a princess?! That's right, our first interaction between MJ and Shuri!

To be continued...