Astra Blishwick – twenty-three

For the first time in her life, Astra was actually looking forward to Christmas. She would finally get to throw Constantin Prince's dreaded proposal back in his face. Augustin had promised to take her to see Eily as much as possible before she returned home. That way Astra would know she was back to full health before she was inevitably barred from ever going to hers and Valentin's house again after Christmas. And, up till then, Augustin would procure Gestation Numbing Potion for her to give to Iola.

Astra hadn't quite decided how she was going to explain to Iola that she had gotten Augustin involved yet. She knew she would have to; after Christmas Iola would undoubtedly begin to wonder how Astra was stealing potions from a house she wasn't allowed into.

The blonde Slytherin had decided that she would be able to convince Iola of Augustin's allegiance to their beliefs by then. After all, he was already helping her, even though she wasn't aware of the fact.

"Tell me one more time," Venusia Crickerly was whispering to Kendra Frey during Defence Against the Dark Arts, "exactly how Percival proposed. Oh, and let me see that ring again, it's simply stunning!"

Kendra obliged happily, explaining the romantic moment in thrilling detail. Astra was sure that the story became more and more elaborate every time Kendra told it, but she put that down to excitement. Unwarranted excitement, in Astra's opinion, but excitement, nonetheless. Percival Dumbledore had never been high up on Astra's list of favourite people.

"Miss Crickerly," Professor Trimble drawled lazily from his desk at the front, "I would have thought that given your upcoming Quidditch match this weekend, you would not want to be bogged down with extra work that you failed to complete during this lesson. Am I correct in my thinking?"

Venusia immediately went quiet, hanging her head in shame. "Yes, Professor." She muttered guiltily.

From his place at the back of the classroom, next to Aisling Rosier, Elias Grimstone let out an undignified snort. Venusia turned around to shoot him a glare but Trimble cleared his throat menacingly.

Elias and Venusia argued enough already. Bringing Quidditch into the picture was just foolish. Besides, as much as Astra knew Venusia didn't want to hear it, her team really didn't stand a chance against Elias' Hufflepuffs on the coming Saturday.

"I've been thinking, y'know," Kendra began quietly next to Astra.

"Oh, a new activity for you?" Astra asked, wiggling her eyebrows in a teasing manner.

Kendra nudged her friend's arm, causing Astra's quill to jerk off to the side, drawing a great ugly black line of ink over her essay. She hissed a curse at Kendra, who just smiled, and then she began to dab at her work with a handkerchief she found in her pocket.

"Who's ATP?" Kendra asked suddenly.

"What?" Astra asked, still scrubbing away at her parchment and not looking at her dark-haired friend.

"That handkerchief," Kendra clarified, "has the initials ATP embroidered on it."

Astra noticed that she was right and mentally scolded herself for not realising before getting it out. The letters were in calligraphic font and looked absolutely beautiful. Typical of Augustin, she thought grumpily.

"Err, I don't know. I've had it for ages." She lied, hastily shoving it back into her pocket, "What were you saying you'd been thinking about?"

Kendra did not seem keen to let the mystery of the initials slide so easily but she sighed and said, "I think I should use a spell to replicate my engagement ring and then sell the real one and give the money to my parents. They're awfully poor and I want to help them, I really do, but they won't let me use magic to help so I thought this could be an alternative."

Astra furrowed her brow, "Won't Percival notice?"

"I doubt it." Kendra muttered.

"And besides," Astra continued, "as much as I don't get on with the bloke, Percival loves you Kendra; if your parents need money I'm sure he'd gladly provide it. He's definitely not what one would call poor."

"No." Kendra agreed, "But I can't just ask him for money. That's not right."

Astra rolled her eyes, "Such a Gryffindor thing to say."

"I'll think about it some more." Kendra decided. And they went back to their essays.

-AB-

Astra had one last Occlumency lesson before the upcoming Quidditch match that Saturday. So, getting up from the library on Thursday evening, she explained to Kendra and Gerbold where she was going. Elias and Venusia were both busy training for the match and Kerrick had gone 'somewhere' with Matilde Northern, as he had put it.

"What?" Kendra asked, looking up from her Astronomy textbook, clearly not having listened to what Astra had said.

"I'm going to the dungeons for detention with Prince. Y'know, our teacher; black hair, blue eyes, generally bored attitude." Astra said slowly.

Kendra narrowed her eyes at the Slytherin, "Yes, of course I know who- oh!"

This time it was Astra's turn to be confused, "What?" she questioned.

Kendra shrugged, "Oh, it's nothing really. Percival and I have been joking around about baby names and I want to tease him with some ridiculous ones is all. So, do Augustin and his brothers have middle names?"

Astra frowned, sure that Kendra must have an ulterior motive for asking such a question but she couldn't fathom what it was.

"Valentin Claudius. Constantin Julianus. Augustin Tiberius. They've got a thing for Roman Emperors." She reeled off from memory. One thing was certain, she did agree that they were ridiculous names.

"Augustin….Tiberius?" Kendra repeated; one brow raised.

"That's what she said, Kenny." Gerbold clarified, also listening now. Obviously, the care of Hippogriffs was not enthralling enough for him.

"Augustin Tiberius Prince?" Kendra went on, as if she had the short-term memory of a goldfish.

"Yes." Astra said, getting annoyed now, "Look, Kendra, I really have to go to detention-"

"Ah, yes!" Kendra cried triumphantly, earning her a glare from the librarian, "Detention with ATP no less! Going to return his well-loved handkerchief, are you?"

Finally realising what Kendra had been playing at the entire time Astra gasped, "You sneaky little Slytherin! Of course that's not why! In case you'd forgotten, I have detention tonight for trying to kill Aisling Rosier."

But the damage was done.

"Why on earth do you have Professor Prince's handkerchief?" Gerbold asked, now completely ignoring his Care of Magical Creatures homework.

Kendra was still watching Astra with a sly smirk on her face. She was, by far, the most Slytherin Gryffindor Astra knew.

"We're friends, alright! You know that! He gave it to me at Halloween when I spilled a drink. I just kept it by accident." It wasn't a complete lie. More a fabrication of a truth; she and Augustin were friends and there was no reason why he couldn't have lent her the handkerchief to clear up a spilt drink. He just hadn't.

"And to think, you called me a Slytherin." Kendra said triumphantly, clearly aware that Astra was lying, "We're all adults here, Astra, you can be honest with us."

"Oh, for goodness sake, think whatever you want to think, the pair of you. I have to go." And the blonde scurried out of the library, trying to remember that she needed to burn that damned handkerchief.

It was exceptionally cold down in the dungeons. Astra shivered as she knocked on Prince's office door. His baritone voice beckoned her in, and she took her usual seat across from his desk. He looked more tired than usual and slightly frustrated. Astra could see several scrunched-up pieces of parchment kindling on his fire, his spiky handwriting across all of them.

"Are you alright, Professor?" Astra asked nervously, her anger at Kendra and Gerbold completely dissipating.

He met her eyes and smiled vaguely, "I'm fine, Miss Blishwick. Professor Bloom just enjoys wasting both his and others' time with his nonsense."

"Tell me about it." Astra snorted, recalling how many Divination lessons she had already sat through that term whilst wishing she could pitch herself off the astronomy tower instead.

Prince smiled genuinely at this.

"He keeps telling me there's a baby in a cauldron in my future. I keep telling him that putting a baby in a cauldron is enough to land me in Azkaban." She went on, hoping to make him laugh.

She didn't succeed. Prince just huffed and told her his plan for the evening. They were going to practice Occlumency for an hour. And then Astra was going to brew a Wolfsbane potion.

"But sir, that's an incredibly difficult potion!" Astra moaned, "And I'm always tired after Occlumency!"

"You'll be tired by the end of the year when the International Potion Competition takes place, Miss Blishwick, but you'll still have to take part." He told her sternly.

Then his face softened slightly, "And from now on, we shall use our Tuesday evening detentions to visit Eily, if you would like that?"

Astra's heart leapt, "Oh, yes please sir!" she nodded eagerly, "Although, I don't think Professor Black will be best pleased. These detentions are supposed to be a punishment to correct my behaviour, after all."

Prince smirked at her, "Why, Miss Blishwick, the last time I saw you hold our new nephew it seemed to fulfil those requirements perfectly."

Astra laughed. They began the Occlumency soon after and Astra fought especially hard to hide from him the overwhelming sense of happiness and belonging she had felt at hearing him use the phrase 'our nephew'.

She couldn't really hide it from herself any longer, as she realised she had been doing for some time; Astra Blishwick felt at home in the company of Augustin Prince. More so than when she was at her parents' house over the holidays, more so than when she lay in her Slytherin dorm next to Iola Black and more so than when she hid parts of her life from her best friends to save both them and herself the pain of a full explanation. She could tell Augustin anything because he knew everything. He knew all the difficulties she was experiencing and he understood them. He knew all the people in Astra's life who she had to deal with and he dealt with them too. And, she couldn't deny, she had felt secure, comforted and confident every time he had held her.

But she protected these thoughts; barricaded them away in the back of her mind as Augustin entered her head. He had tasked her with trying to prevent him from seeing who she had last spoken to before she had come to him that evening. His suggestion had been that she fabricate a new memory to show him, patched together from old memories.

She focused as hard as she possibly could and imagined sitting on her dorm bed, Iola next to her. Then she remembered talking to her cousin about Septimius Malfoy; that was a true memory. But she didn't let the conversation they had actually had come to the surface. Instead, she superimposed the words they had shared as they'd left the Hitchins' house.

Astra watched herself blush as she sat on her four poster, confessing to Iola that she thought Septimius Malfoy was incredibly handsome. She watched Iola agree. She waited patiently for Iola to go on to clarify that Septimius preferred the company of other men, but it never came. Instead, she felt Augustin pull out of her mind very quickly.

"So," he said, and Astra thought his voice sounded strangled and distant, "am I correct in thinking that you had been discussing the….aesthetic appeal of a certain Malfoy man with your youngest cousin before you came here this evening?"

Astra grinned widely.

"Well?" Augustin demanded.

Astra shook her head, "No. I was talking to Kendra in the library." She beamed at him.

He seemed bemused at that.

"So," he paused, "you don't find Septimius Malfoy attractive?"

Astra raised a brow at him and he deliberately looked away, telling her everything she needed to know.

"I think we both know that that's not a question a Professor should or needs to ask their student, sir." Astra said, trying to tame her hammering heart. She wasn't even sure why her heart was racing. She wasn't exactly ashamed of admitting that Malfoy was handsome; even Iola had agreed with her.

"Forgive me." Augustin murmured, "You are right, of course, Miss Blishwick."

And then, "What do you think of Septimius Malfoy, Astra?"

Astra felt herself smile at this. It was the first time she had found their confusing names system actually helpful. His use of her given name told her that he now knew that they were in conversational territory not appropriate for a student and teacher but that he wished to continue as friends.

"I think he is an interesting man, Aug." she answered truthfully, "But I know that's not what you're asking. So, if you're asking as my friend, then ask me plainly. Please."

His eyes shifted nervously and he began to scratch at some of the parchment on his desk. It was something Astra had seen him do before, usually when he was thinking too much.

"Talk to me, Aug." Astra said gently, reaching for his frenzied hand and squeezing it calmingly. She hadn't anticipated that she would be the one offering comfort tonight. If she had been him, Astra wouldn't have come to herself for comfort even if she were the last person on earth.

He met her eyes and Astra thought she could detect guilt in his grimace.

"Astra, I've known you since you were born. I've been your teacher since you were eleven. I am seventeen years older than you, that is twice your age. And I've just asked you whether or not you find a man attractive. Anyone with a brain would sack me on the spot." He fretted. Astra had never seen him so wound up.

She chuckled lightly, "Aug, if I were any other student then yes, it might be inappropriate. But you said it yourself, I've known you all my life. You've been my teacher for seven years but my friend for a decade more. And I don't care how old you are, I never have. Besides, I'm of age, and have been for half a year. I know that I'm not completely mature. And I know that I have a lot of growth yet to do but I am an adult now. And viewing people as attractive is not something new in my life." She paused to reconsider this statement, "Well, it's sort of new to me, but my best friend is engaged to be married, Aug, and she's hardly kept her relationship quiet for the past two years."

"Astra, I know you're of age. I know you think you know what you're doing and what you think about things, but-"

"No, Aug. Don't tell me that I don't know my own mind because I do. Obviously, I'm going to become more mature and experienced, everyone is until the day they die, but it doesn't mean they don't know their own minds. It just means that their mind evolves over time and they learn new things about themselves." Astra didn't realise she had stood up but she found herself leaning over Augustin's desk, her palms flat on the surface.

"Alright, alright." Augustin relented gently, holding his hands up in surrender, "I apologise, Astra. I suppose a part of me thinks that if I can convince myself that you don't know your own mind then I'll find it easier to keep myself in check."

"Keep yourself in check about what?" Astra frowned.

Augustin growled slightly and Astra jerked backwards a little.

"Sorry." He muttered.

And then, "Astra, I think I need to be honest with you. We can forgo the Wolfsbane potion tonight. Please, sit down."