Keeperofwords here: Big plot movement starting here and we promise it will be quite a ride. And we are so excited to let you start reading this as we set up what we got planned for the rest of the story. Thanks as always for reading and the comments. You are so appreciated.
Chapter 20: Cracked Foundation
Shelby poured her third cup of coffee of the morning, and it was only nine thirty. She was proud of herself though, after a few long nights of staying up to work on lesson plans, she had finally allowed herself to take a long, hot bath the night before with some essential oils and quiet time to herself. It had relaxed her enough to allow her to get a decent night's rest, with a little help from some extra melatonin, and she had woken feeling refreshed for the first time in months.
Cassandra was in a similar work mode, but lacking in rest. Her drive was also much more physical than Shelby's, so her focus was in a different place. She had locked herself in her studio to focus on choreography and it had been that way for days, only coming out for meals, the restroom, and to refill her water bottle. Shelby wasn't convinced she was filling it with water, however; at the rate her wife was going it was more likely to be Red Bull. Baby Cadence had her own corner of the dance studio, with mats and toys galore, content to play on her own, (at least until after dinner, when she would start to get fussy).
Rachel, meanwhile, had been spending a lot of time with Lena, attempting to finish up and comprehend her summer lessons before they hired her new fall tutor. Natalie had also been trying to get her more interested in reading for pleasure, but Rachel was only interested in fantasy books that had princesses and magic in them, which Natalie was lacking in. Besides that, Rachel was not eager to spend time over at Holly and April's as of late, so she hid in her attic space with her homework or, most recently, spent her time with Barbra on her bed. Rachel decided she was going to ask her mommies for new books at dinner that night, and in the meantime she would finish up her most recent math lesson, which she was struggling with. Lena was a great help and the perfect teacher, and Rachel was more than a little nervous to switch over to a new tutor in a few weeks' time. She tried not to think about it.
She coughed into the corner of her arm and the sudden jolt motivated Barbra to screech and jump off the bed, running for the door.
"Barbra," Rachel sighed, distressed. "Come back, I'm sorry…" she shoved her books and pencil to the side and crawled out of her covers, following the cat down the stairs and into the kitchen, where she found her Mommy typing away viciously on her computer. Rachel sat up at the kitchen counter and smiled at her mother, who gave her a wink and a soft smile. Shelby held up her finger to indicate that she was going to finish typing up an email, hit send, then turned and looked at her daughter.
"What's up, buttercup? I didn't know you were awake. Want some breakfast?"
Rachel's eyes widened. "Yes, please!" she said, eagerly. She hadn't even thought about food until her mother had mentioned it, but now that she had she felt starving. Shelby gave another wink and then set about her way to start making pancakes, a household favorite. While she prepared the ingredients, she poured Rachel a cup of orange juice and set it down in front of her. Rachel drank it down slowly, in thought.
"Where's Mama?" she asked. "Is she working in the studio again?" She scrunched her nose when she looked at the calendar across the room and caught the date. "I guess school starts soon."
"Sooner than we would like for it to," Shelby sighed, sharing Rachel's disgust over the fact that their summer was flying by. "And yes, Mama is in the studio again today, trying to figure out what to do with her junior class and decide who her TA is going to be for the year."
"What's that mean?" Rachel asked. Barbra had warmed back up to the idea of being around the little girl, and rubbed against her leg.
Shelby looked over at her daughter upon hearing her speak again, detecting some stuffiness in her sound. She assessed the girl, whose eyes looked a little watery, but they almost always were, naturally. She decided she'd keep an eye on her.
"TA? It means her assistant, she always picks a senior to help her teach her classes for the year. They're who save us when life takes over. Like when we can't be in class?" Shelby explained, mixing the pancake batter and heating a pan on the stove.
Rachel nodded in understanding, sniffing in her next breath. Shelby leaned over the counter and placed her hand to Rachel's forehead.
"Honey, are you feeling okay?" she asked.
Rachel shrugged the question off, along with Shelby's hand on her forehead. "Fine," she said nonchalantly. "Kinda sleepy."
"Hmm," Shelby responded, furrowing her brow. Her little girl's forehead felt a little warm, but she wasn't sure if it was warm enough to be concerning or if she was overreacting. The last thing she wanted to do was take her back to the doctor for a little while, so she hoped it was the latter. Rachel wouldn't even look at April when she came over as it was.
When Shelby looked back up again from her pancake endeavors, she saw that her wife had entered the room, sweaty and out of breath with Cadence on her hip. Cassandra kissed Rachel on the back of the head and then nodded towards Shelby. Shelby smirked as Cassandra sat in the empty seat next to Rachel and pulled Cadence to the front of her. The baby slapped her hands excitedly on the countertop.
"Figure out what you're going to do yet?" Shelby asked, adjusting the heat on the stove. Rachel drank more of her orange juice, grateful to catch a glimpse of her Mama for the first time in a minute, even if she did have the baby with her. Rachel supposed she couldn't just expect them to leave the baby in rooms by herself.
"Eh. It's coming along I guess. I need to step away from it for a while, I've been at it too long and it's all starting to blur together…" She accepted a glass of orange juice from Shelby, mindfully keeping it out of reach of Cadence when she set it back down. The glass matched the one Rachel drank out of and Rachel smiled at the thought.
"Well, the rest of the stuff for the nursery came in today, so we should probably start working on that," Shelby suggested. Cassandra nodded in thought, mentally shifting her to-do list around in her brain to make it fit. "I've also been thinking, so I'm glad you're both in here...Rachel, I know the attic is your safe space…" Shelby started plating pancakes and passing them out. Cassandra moved to put Cadence in the high chair so she could eat as well, then tore up a piece of pancake for her to play with or eat, whichever she decided.
Rachel looked up when she heard her name, slowly setting her glass down. Her heart fluttered anxiously upon mention of the attic, hoping her mother wasn't going to tell her she couldn't spend time up there anymore and unsure what she would do without the ability to run up there and be alone every once in a while.
"...but it is unfinished up there, and dirty…" Shelby continued. "There's dust everywhere and god knows what else, with all of those old boxes. I was wondering what your thoughts would be on Mama and I finishing it so it looks more like an actual playroom? I'd be much more comfortable with you going up there if it was a space where I knew you wouldn't get sick, especially in the winter when it gets colder up there. We could paint it whatever color you want and make it a relaxation space for you?"
Cassandra nodded eagerly at the idea, pulling her iPad out of a nearby drawer to start looking up ideas for it. Carpeting was likely out of the question, but finished and potentially polished hardwood would work well up there, especially if they painted it. Her brain worked a million miles a minute and she shoved pancakes into her mouth on autopilot. Her stomach had been screaming at her since seven am, so she was grateful for nourishment in any form.
Rachel considered the offer. It involved more change, which she was not a huge fan of, but she did know that her mom was right. As much as she loved the attic, sometimes it got drafty and dark up there, which was incredibly uninviting and the opposite feeling she yearned for when she felt like she needed to hide or get away. She also didn't always like going up there without Barbra, and sometimes she couldn't convince her cat friend that running upstairs was a great idea. Spiders liked to hide in the dustier corners, and it would be nice if they could block off the air vents so she could practice singing up there without having to go downstairs to the studio. She started to also really like the idea of being able to pick out all of her own things. A thought struck her that she didn't like at all, however.
"Will I have to share the playroom with Cady?" she mumbled, feeling a little stupid for asking but not wanting to be bitter forever if the answer was yes. Cadence didn't flinch hearing her nickname, too focused on trying to eat the pieces of pancake in front of her.
"Not at all," Cassandra said, looking up from her iPad. "Cady will have her own nursery where she'll keep all of her toys, and when she's older we can just adjust her room to her age or use a different spare room for her. The attic is yours and yours alone."
Shelby nodded. "Mama's right," she said. "And it can't be yours alone in the state it's in right now, with all of our boxes up there. Mama and I will have to go through those and move them to a different room, but I think the renovation could be a fun final summer project. We do have to do the nursery also, so we'll have to split our time and figure out where to divide and conquer, but we can work on one room while the other has paint drying and what not…" she paused after plating her own food, cutting the pancake stack and taking a big bite. "Thoughts?" she asked with her mouth full. Rachel giggled at the sight.
"I like it a lot," Rachel admitted. "I think it'll be fun and it'd be nice to have a space besides my bedroom. I don't want the attic for school though," she spoke her thoughts in a long stream. "Because I can do homework in my room or the kitchen or the living room and the attic is a space just for me with no bad things like stupid math that makes my head hurt. And also could we make it sound proof so I can sing up there and so when I'm up there I can't hear everything that happens down here because sometimes it's hard to think up there with all the ruckus down here…." it all came out in one big breath.
"I am not sure how comfortable I am completely sound proofing it, in case something happens and you need to call for us, we need to be able to hear you. But we can see what we can do about muffling it a little more so that the sound from down here doesn't travel," Shelby agreed.
"Then it sounds great!" Rachel agreed. "Can we start today?"
Cassandra smiled, having already pulled several tabs up on her iPad. "I'm already on it for you, Little Star," she scooted the device across the counter. "Let's look at some options for how you want it to look, yeah?"
Rachel got excited thinking about all of the extra time that meant she was going to get to spend with her mothers, and she looked eagerly at all of the options for floors, wall paint, rugs, lamps, and other decorations for the space she was going to be able to design and call her own.
The rest of the morning went on like this, as they dedicated a good chunk of time to deciding the base of the room so they could spend the afternoon cleaning out some of the boxes. Around noon, Dee knocked at the side door and entered the kitchen. She eyed the empty pancake plates and said with mock hurt,
"A pancake breakfast and no invitation. I see how it is." Her tone held too much laughter in it for anyone to think she was serious. Rachel grinned cheekily.
"Guess that means you gotta eat dinner with us, huh?" she said. Her nose scrunched, feeling tingly, and she sneezed into her arm again. For the second time that morning, Barbra jolted at the sound and ran away. Rachel blinked, confused. Why was she sneezing so much? She shrugged the thought away. Maybe the kitchen had a lot of dust in it. If that were the case, she figured things would really get crazy up in the attic.
"Depends on what dinner is," Dee admitted. "What're you up to? Did you move the paint for Cady's room from the front porch yet or do you want me to go get it?"
"We haven't brought it in yet," Cassandra admitted. "We're trying to order some stuff for the attic. We're gonna transform it for Rachel."
"Sounds fun! I want to help. Put me to work, where do you want me?" Dee said, feeling eager for a chance to feel productive. There was a hold in her most recent case and she felt helpless watching Shelby and Cassandra scramble all the time when she had all of this extra time.
"If you actually wanted to grab that paint and start mixing it for us, that'd be amazing," Shelby said, picking up the empty plates and setting them in the sink. "We could paint the nursery and then while that's drying we can go upstairs and start pulling those boxes down." She formed the game plan while she talked, but felt that it was pretty solid. Dedicating the right amount of time to both projects while still making Rachel's attic the priority.
"On it, boss," Dee nodded, heading towards the front of the house.
Shelby turned to her wife. "Cassie, honey, why don't you-"
Her thought was cut off by the sound of Cassandra's phone ringing. Cassandra looked at the phone, and held an apologetic finger up at Shelby, answering the call hesitantly even though she didn't recognize the number.
"Cassandra Corcoran-July speaking," she asked, getting out of her seat and starting to walk towards the living room for privacy.
"Cassandra?" her aunt Melissa's voice rang through the speaker, and Cassandra blinked upon recognition.
"Aunt Melissa! Hi, I didn't have your name in my phone yet, sorry." she said, picking at her thumb in thought. "Is everything okay?" She sat on the edge of the couch so she wouldn't pace. Regardless of being mentally exhausted, her physical energy level was through the roof. She could thank energy drinks, food, and anxiety for that.
"Things are fine," Melissa reassured. "Truly, I just wanted to call to see how things were with you, and maybe set up a video conference, coffee date type thing with you if that's something you would be interested in? Happy late birthday, by the way, I'm sorry I missed it."
Cassandra took a second to process all of the information that was thrown at her. "Thank you," she managed to stutter. "Um...yeah we could set that up...did you have a time in mind? Are you sure everything is okay?"
She wasn't used to people trying to set up conferences with her if there wasn't some underlying issue that she needed to figure out how to solve. There was a slight shift in Melissa's tone.
"There are some family members calling about your parents' estate," she admitted, jumping the gun so she could get to the root of her call. "But that can be dealt with in a little while. I really, truly, just want to check in on you. Get to know you a little better. Are you free tonight or tomorrow?"
"Uh…" Cassandra thought about it. She didn't even think about having to deal with her parents' estate, and was kicking herself for not thinking about that while she was already in New Jersey for the funeral. She didn't want her stingy, conservative relatives getting their hands on things before she went through them either, though. Even though most of her childhood was garbage to say the least, she did have some fond memories, particularly with her sister. She wanted to go and preserve what she could of her sister's things and some of hers before everyone else got dug through it like vultures. It was something she was sure could be avoided for at least a few more weeks, and with the new projects they were spending the day starting she really didn't even want to consider going back to New Jersey at the moment, so she put the thought out of her mind almost as quickly as it had entered it. "Tonight… Let me check with the wife and kids, we're sort of working on this renovation project…"
"No rush at all. Actually, you know what? I'm totally and completely free almost all day every day, I currently have absolutely no life. So why don't you just text me when you are free and we can work from there? I really just wanted to put the idea out there… I...Cassandra I really regret not being more involved in your life sooner." the older woman bit her lip, worried about how that last sentence would be interpreted.
Cassandra bit the inside of her cheek. "Mmhmmm," she said, not unkindly, but out of contemplation. What did "getting more involved" entail? She was an adult at this point, she could take care of herself and she hoped her aunt knew that. She was grateful, however, that she finally found a family member that didn't seem to hate her. She also couldn't ignore, she knew, the kind things Melissa had said in defense of her at the funeral, and she reminded herself that not everyone had an ulterior motive all the time. "Yeah, okay. I can text you tonight and see where we're at with this project thing? We're three hours ahead of you, right?"
"Yes, so if it's not too late at night for you, it shouldn't theoretically be too late for me, either," Melissa offered. It was clear she had something she wanted to say to Cassandra, and the younger July family member wished she would just spit it out already. Maybe she really doesn't though, Cassandra considered. Maybe she really just wants to get to know you. See if there's anything she can help with. She seems like the type.
"Sounds good, I will let Shelby know you reached out and we can go from there? I need to go paint the nursery, or I'd just stay and talk right now…" Cassandra glanced at her watch and sighed. There weren't enough hours in the day as it was.
"No, no, I completely understand. Text me later, you have my number now. I hope to hear from you soon. Send everyone my well wishes," Melissa said.
"Will do, thank you," Cassandra said, still a little unsure. The whole conversation seemed odd to her and she knew she was overanalyzing but couldn't help but wonder why Melissa cared now when she didn't before. Is it just because my parents are dead? She thinks I can't handle myself now? I hate to break it to her, but I've been living without them for years and my life with them gone is not a lot different.
Except that it was. Whether it was because her parents were dead or not, Cassandra's life was so drastically different, and she knew that was dragging her down. She knew that she was having a harder time focusing, a difficult time falling asleep regardless of her clear exhaustion, and that her mood was all over the place. It was affecting her parenting, her relationship, and her friendships. Soon, once she had students in her studio, she knew it would start impacting her work as well.
Her mood had been so drastically different lately that she had even scheduled a therapy session for the next day even though she wasn't supposed to go in until friday. She knew that she had been a complete bitch when they took Rachel to the doctor, and those emotions felt uncontrollable and slightly illogical to her. She needed someone to talk through that day with her without being judgmental, but who would also give her the advice to see things in a different perspective. She knew she hadn't been completely in the wrong, but neither had Shelby, and she needed a third party that wouldn't just agree with her because they were friends.
When she'd tried to apologize to Rachel about the day, Shelby had stopped her, telling her that Rachel hadn't noticed the harsh tone or changed attitude as much as everyone else had. This made sense to Cassandra, since she had only talked about her irritation that day with April and Shelby. When she'd apologized to her wife for her behavior, the whole incident was practically shrugged off, and the topic shifted almost immediately. This hadn't set well with Cassandra, who felt like maybe her family and friends were getting far too used to her being snappy and rude when she didn't feel one hundred percent. She recognized now that feeling or agreeing with her wife one hundred percent all the time was far from a possibility anymore, and that she was going to have to accept that quickly.
As Cassandra and Shelby started painting the nursery, Cassandra voiced some of these concerns at a whisper. Rachel was laying down in her room, since Shelby had taken her temperature on a hunch and it had read 99 again. It was possible that Rachel's temperature just naturally ran high, as they didn't have reason to check it often and weren't entirely sure what her normal rate was, but with all of the sneezing the girl had been doing and the tired feeling she couldn't seem to shake, Shelby had suggested a nap while they worked on the baby's room. She knew Rachel hadn't wanted to work on Cadence's new space anyways, and that would give her time to re-energize before they moved on to working on the attic. Cadence had been laid down for her early afternoon nap as well, leaving the wives to work alone.
"We do need to work on finding a balance when we don't agree, instead of getting into random spats at McDonald's," Shelby agreed. "I am hoping your therapy session tomorrow will maybe help you sort out some of that pent up anger. I think a lot of it is from what's been happening with your parents," she admitted, dipping the roller into a pastel coral shade of paint and rolling it onto the wall carefully. "You need to remember that she's just a kid, who has had a lot of bad things happen to her. Many of which I know you can relate to, so your reactions sometimes confuse me… but I also need to learn not to coddle her all the time and suffocate her by being a helicopter parent or making exceptions to every single rule in life and spoiling her. I think we can find that balance, but it might take a minute…"
"I'm sorry, Shelby," Cassandra said for what Shelby felt was the hundredth time.
"No, stop, I know you are, really. It's okay. We worked it out. Rachel is fine. I mean I think she might have a summer cold, but emotionally she is fine and she isn't upset with you either. If anything, she's upset with April, she wouldn't even sit next to her the other night. We should try to address that soon, I know it's taking away her time spent with Natalie, too."
"That trust will probably take a minute to build back up," Cassandra said, rolling paint near the window, careful to avoid the actual window sill itself, which was meant to remain white. "And I understand if it will take yours a minute to build back up with me, too. I know I haven't been the most tolerable person to be around…" guilt ate at her heart, anger towards herself building up though she tried not to let that show. She knew exactly why Rachel was so afraid of the doctor and understood that on a personal level. For that reason, she knew she could have been a little more compassionate towards her situation the other day. Even getting her to the doctor at all was a massive accomplishment, and everything else they got done that day had just been a bonus.
"It's understandable that you sometimes react the way you do," Shelby said.
"It's not, not really," Cassandra said. "I meant a lot of what I said, and I know you know that. But I also didn't mean to get so frustrated. Maybe I need anger management. Or medication."
"Or you need to go to therapy more than twice a month and actually give it time to help you," Shelby said matter-of-factly, finishing up her section of the wall and setting the roller down. She put her hands on her hips and took a step back, proudly examining her work. "This wall is good, I think. The second coat is on it now and it looks even enough."
Cassandra nodded. "Good, good. This all is almost done, and then we can head upstairs…Oh, Melissa wants me to video chat her tonight," she tried to throw it into the conversation casually, but the whole statement ended up being awkward to say. Shelby picked up on the edge in Cassandra's tone.
"You don't trust her?" Shelby guessed. "That's valid, I suppose, you don't know much about her. Hell, maybe you should give her the benefit of the doubt though, she certainly surprised us at the funeral."
Cassandra knew Shelby was right. She finished a small square on the wall and set her roller down, wiping her forehead with the back of her hand. When that didn't seem to help enough, she pulled the bottom of her shirt up to the top of her face. "Yeah, maybe I should. I told her I'd let her know later, maybe I can text her after dinner or something. I just want to know what she wants."
"Your lack of trust is astounding, she could just want to befriend her niece," Shelby pointed out.
"And your naivety is astounding," Cassandra smirked back. "You know how my family can be."
"That's true too," Shelby sighed. She surveyed the room to be sure they didn't miss a spot, but the whole room seemed pretty covered. She smiled to herself, proud of what they had accomplished so far. "Guess you'll have to call her and find out." She popped her wife on her ass for good measure and they exited the room together so they could get a break from inhaling the paint fumes. They hadn't opened the window since they had the A/C running and the strong scent was enough to give anyone a headache.
After pausing for some water in the kitchen, they checked in on the girls, who both seemed to be doing fine, and grabbed the baby monitors from their rooms to take up to the attic. Although aware of the monstrous task ahead of them, they were fairly certain that a lot of the boxes in the attic were either completely full of junk, or filled with things they could move into the spare office.
. . .
Thunder crashed and rattled the old windows of the attic in the Corcoran July Mansion. Shelby jumped slightly at the sound and pulled some old curtains over the window so the lightning wouldn't bother her. Dee and Cassandra had already started sorting boxes into several different piles on the other side of the room. They had boxes to go through and decide what needed to be discarded and kept, boxes they knew had to just be moved to the downstairs office, boxes with Dee's name on them, and boxes filled with memories from college, high school, and childhood. Cadence, who was wide awake after her nap earlier, had her own little corner of the attic cleaned up, with her playmat placed down, but she was adamant that she would go through the boxes her older sister was going through to make this process last twice as long.
Shelby jumped after a particular lightening strike that was way to close for her liking. Cadence was unfazed however so she was determined not to show the toddler the storm was playing with her emotions. Shelby had been moving boxes throughout the day and the closer they got to the wall, the further back in time they were timestamped. For her part, she had carefully stuck to those that she and Cassie had boxed up themselves either in Ohio or for their move from the city back to Lima. As the afternoon progressed it was becoming apparent that she could not put off the inevitable forever. She had already experienced the pangs of emotion that came with finding old playbills, old printed scripts that were annotated with stage directions, ticket stubs from shows of their friends, and pressed flowers from closing nights. She loved her life. She loved Ohio, and the impact she was having on the next generation. She was committed to it, but she would be lying if she didn't admit there was a part of her heart that remained in the city. Seeing these things just brought all of those emotions back. Cassandra's voice broke her ruminations.
"Oh my god!" Cassandra exclaimed, wiping the dust off her hands on her shorts and reaching into an old office paper box after removing the lid. "Dee, is that your handwriting?" the blonde asked. "It says "pictures". I thought it was of the wedding or one of your trips to Peru or something. But this is so much older..."
"Let me see that," Dee swallowed back nerves as more and more boxes were revealing the past. They were getting to the ones she placed here herself when she stored a bunch of stuff before she went to Africa and sold her place in New York, and she knew she had an unmarked box up there somewhere that she really hoped Shelby would not find before her. Dee stepped away from her own box and moved to look over Cassandra's shoulder. She said nothing, just watched as her niece went to stand on Cassandra's other side and the trio stood over an open, leather-bound photo album.
"Shelbs, my god, what were you, three?" Cassandra exclaimed, looking at a picture of Shelby in a blue dress with white polka dots playing the piano. They were complete with lacy socks and black patent shoes. Cassandra observed that her wife's expression was solemn and bordered on miserable. She was smart enough in this instance to keep any snarky comments about the outfit on the back of her tongue. Shelby seemed to have her own thoughts about it, however.
"I hated those shoes. They hurt my feet and those lacy socks itched, but mom used to make me wear them all the time anyways, because they went with everything…" she rolled her eyes at the memory.
Dee was waiting for the question, "How did you end up with these?" from either of her niece's. Both women, however, were more interested at the moment with the pictures themselves. Dee's heart pounded and she closed her eyes, trying hard to think of the place she had hidden the unmarked box. She wasn't ready to explain its contents to Shelby, but also wasn't entirely sure how to get it out of the attic without the younger women noticing.
"Shelbs, oh my god, you were so cute. I never have seen these. You look just like Rachel. I can so see the resemblance." Cassandra found herself turning page after page, looking at birthdays, recitals, and even christmases. Excited to see something about the love of her life that she previously had no knowledge of, Cassandra handed the book over to Dee and grabbed for another album. This one was older, and was a faded blue leather with the three rings and several pages inside. She opened it carefully, because it seemed very fragile and very precariously put together. Cassandra swallowed, sparing a glance at her wife. This was obviously Shelby's baby book. She wanted to close it up and put it away, but her wife was already reaching for it with shaking hands.
"That's...that's me," Shelby said with confusion in her tone. She didn't realize her aunt owned baby pictures of her. She had never seen pictures of herself from before she was probably three. Silently, Shelby looked through them and shook her head, wondering if that was what Rachel had looked like at the same age. She supposed she'd never know the answer. "Aunt Dee, where did you get these?"
Do I lie or tell her the truth? Dee felt sick to her stomach. They had been given to her by her sister, and she'd forgotten they weren't in the unmarked box with everything else. Dee chastised herself in her head. You had to have known that eventually she was going to find all of this if you put it in her attic, Corcoran. It was only a matter of time. Maybe that means deep down you wanted her to find everything. You have to tell her eventually.
"I uh…" Dee started, unsure how she wanted to word what she was about to say. Her head started to pound and she thought about how mad Shelby was going to be at her when she realized that the boxes had come from her mother. When she realized that Susan and Dee had been in communication for years, and that these boxes were given to her willingly. The last thing she had ever wanted to do was hurt Shelby, and Dee had told herself for years that she was going to talk to Shelby about her mother in a much different format. She thought back to the day that Susan had come to her for help, wondering if there was anything from that conversation she could salvage to help her talk through this calmly and rationally…
Dee was running late to her office on a morning in mid April, when her day was, of course, incredibly packed. Her first appointment was at 9:15 am, which was admittedly later than usual, but she had slept through three alarms and the coffee line had been mind numbingly long. She hopped onto her bright yellow moped and puttered down the busy New York City street, winding through cars when she was able to, and taking as many short cuts as possible. She wondered briefly if her detour for coffee was going to cost her, when at 9 am she was caught at a red light. She sucked in a nervous breath and looked up from her wrist watch, speeding to her office parking garage and paying extra for the chauffeur fee, which was incredibly unusual for her. She supposed it was just one of those days.
It was 9:10 by the time she finally threw herself down in her office chair and booted up her computer for the day. She sipped her coffee gratefully and rolled her neck in slow circles before fixing her clothing and checking her lipstick in a small hand mirror. The longer work hours had been killing her and were clearly messing with her sleep schedule, but she knew they were necessary for a little while longer. Shelby had recently moved in with her and was still trying her hardest to find a job. Supporting two people in Dee's small New York apartment had been proving more complicated than she'd originally thought it would be. Still, she wouldn't trade having Shelby with her for the world. It would just take some readjusting, she reminded herself. She would have to start setting her alarm a little earlier and take on fewer pro bono cases, at least for the time being.
When her desk computer showed 9:15, right on time, she heard a tentative knock against her office door. She called out for the person to come in, setting her coffee down and flipping a few files over to hide the confidential information. Suddenly, once Dee's first appointment stepped through the office door, she wished for something a hell of a lot stronger than coffee.
Not many things rendered Dee Corcoran speechless. With all the places she had lived in the states and abroad, with the people she either defended or vilified in the courtroom, nothing much truly fazed her. That morning, however, Dee could only stare at the woman who walked into the office presenting much more confidence than Dee suspected she actually had.
The woman was dressed to the nines, making Dee feel horribly underdressed in her own space. Where Dee's younger sister Susan donned a red cocktail dress, complete with blush suede ankle strap heels and a matching Michael Kors handbag, Dee had dressed in a simple olive green jumpsuit and beige heels.
Instead of inviting her sister to sit down, Dee stood from her chair, keeping the office desk as a buffer between them. Neither woman said a word to one another. Dee glared her sister up and down in silent frustration, the silence quickly becoming awkward, but she couldn't bring herself to speak first. Susan had one hand firmly clutching her handbag, as if someone might steal it, and the other down at her side holding a pair of sunglasses. Dee could tell just from Susan's posture that she was guarding herself, and if that were the case, Dee wondered why she had even bothered to show up. Managing to find her voice first despite her rage, Dee held on to the back of her office chair as a means of supporting herself, her legs feeling weak from the shock.
"I have an appointment at 9:15," Dee spoke up, tilting her head towards the mantle where an old fashioned table clock rested. She left unsaid that the other woman would have to leave as soon as possible, finally managing to move around the desk and walk past her unexpected visitor to physically show her the door.
"I am your 9:15 appointment, Deborah," Susan's voice was crisp and deep, exhibiting a tone of thorough annoyance towards her older sister. She had told herself coming into the meeting that she would not fall into her usual habits, but she almost couldn't help herself once they were standing face to face for the first time in months. She bit her tongue and took a deep breath, calming herself. This was not how she wanted to start the encounter, and knew that it would be up to her to try to dissipate the hostility between them.
Dee could have said several things in that moment. Expletives, rants, and blistering attacks all rested on the tip of her tongue. She had half a mind to go to her office phone and just call the police to have the woman escorted out and put on a watch list so she would not be able to return. Instead, seeing that Susan was not moving from her spot in the middle of the office, Dee cleared her throat and walked briskly back to her desk to grab a small yellow notepad. She quickly scribbled down a name and number and shoved it into her younger sister's hand.
"I can't help you," Dee said, working hard to keep her tone neutral and not show the emotion she was holding back. This was her professional working space, and she was not going to risk her colleagues seeing her crack under familial pressure. "This is the number of a friend of mine that works in one of our branches in Cincinnati. That is where you're still living, correct? Ohio?"
"Deborah…I'm your only sister, and you won't even give me the chance to talk to you? Even after I went through all of the trouble to make an appointment?" Susan asked, knowing she deserved worse treatment than Dee was actually giving her. Dee was only being as nice as she was because they were in a semi-public space, which Susan had been counting on.
"You lost your chances a long time ago, Susan," Dee said, clenching her jaw. "The final straw was four months ago when you became the devil incarnate and did the unspeakable. So get the hell out of my office without a fight, before I call the authorities and have you removed."
"Deborah, I-" Susan tried to start again, trying her best to shove away the comments about her being the devil, but knowing that they weren't unfair to say.
"My name is Dee," Dee cut her off, her hand slamming down onto her desk. "If you were any kind of sister to me you would know that."
"Dee," Susan amended. "I'm sorry. Please, just hear me out. I know your next appointment isn't until 10:15."
Dee opened her mouth to protest, but stopped herself, searching her sister's eyes for a sign that she should trust her. Even if only for the hour that she had scheduled. Susan had Shelby's expressive green eyes that were imploring her to listen to what she had to say, regardless of their messy past with one another. Those eyes gave Dee pause, and she admitted to herself that if she didn't find out why this particular ghost from her past was paying her a visit, she would always wonder why she had come.
"Fine," Dee said harshly, slamming the office door shut so their conversation could not be overheard by curious interns or her nosy secretary. She ran a hand through her long brown hair and sat back in her office chair, making no invitation for Susan to take a seat in front of her. Unwelcome guests didn't deserve hospitality. "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't call security." Her tone was low and her posture showed her exhaustion. She straightened up so as to not give her sister the upper hand.
There was a heavy silence between them where Susan collected her courage. She had never been one to shy away from a challenge, or to be intimidated by her sister. Dee had always been the easy-going optimist with more bark than bite, but when it came to Susan she was prepared to dismantle that appearance. She didn't care what it took to do so.
"How is my Shelby doing?" Susan asked finally, ignoring the question about security in the hopes that Dee would just forget about it. Dee sucked in a long, angry breath.
"She isn't your Shelby," Dee said with daggers in her eyes. "Not anymore. And she's adjusting fine. What do you want?" Dee thought that maybe if she cut to the chase she could make it out of the impromptu meeting unscathed.
"A family," Susan whispered, falling down into the office seat across from Dee without invitation. Her voice broke at the confession, but Dee rolled her eyes.
"Jesus christ, Susan, spare me the dramatics, would you?" Dee groaned. "You aren't the victim here, and if you don't understand that then I have absolutely nothing for you-"
"I know, I know." Susan stopped her, holding a hand up so she could speak. Dee blinked incredulously at being shushed, but bit her tongue. "I know, I'm sorry. Deborah, I'm so sorry. I know I fucked up. I do."
"You are pathetic," Dee said, with fire under each word. "And you deserve whatever fate the good lord has in store for you. I want you to turn around and leave my office, and if I ever see you try to bother me or Shelby ever again, I swear to god that I will-"
"Dee," Susan cried. "Please. Please. I need my big sister to listen to me. I need my big sister to trust me, and I know you don't owe me that, but please at least try to hear me out. I came to admit responsibility, not throw it on someone else."
"Haven't you done enough?" Dee demanded. "Isn't ripping your daughter's newborn child out of her arms and selling her to some stranger bad enough? Shelby doesn't want you to be part of her family. And frankly? Neither do I."
"I regretted it the moment I did it. I've been trying to look for the baby since December, but it was a closed adoption and the agency, they dismantled as soon as the adoption was finalized-" Susan tried to get the information out before Dee really did have her forcibly removed from the property. "Please, Dee, I really fucked up, and I'm not sure where else to turn. I can't find her anywhere, I'm afraid that the agency was corrupt…"
Dee's blood ran cold. Her stomach churned, thinking about that poor little newborn baby girl, god only knew where she could have been. Who she was with. If she was even alive. Shelby's depression was bad enough, she didn't need this plaguing her mind on top of everything else.
"You unimaginable bitch," Dee spat. She swallowed hard and bit back tears, not allowing a single one to fall. "You don't care about anyone but yourself. I hope your guilt does eat you alive, because I swear on my life that if anything bad has happened to that little girl, Susan-"
"Dee, you have to help me-" Susan pleaded.
"What are you not understanding?" Dee asked, incredulously. "There's no coming back from this! Ever!"
"Please, Deborah, you and Shelby are the only family I have left," Susan said, feeling desperate. She was ready to give up her entire life and everything in it, if it would mean that her older sister would at least try to see reason. Her life of luxury had quickly felt like it meant nothing once her daughter and sister had disowned her. She knew she was the only one to blame for that. "I know what I have done in my life is unforgivable, I'm not asking for forgiveness."
"Please, you're so fucking manipulative!" Dee yelled, willing herself not to stand from her chair and knock her sister out of hers. "What, did Richard finally come to his senses and leave your sorry ass?"
"I came to mine," Susan said. "I left him."
Dee paused for a moment, wondering if she'd misheard. "I'm sorry? What about his money, how are you surviving without it?" she clicked a pen angrily, counting down from ten and back up in her mind repeatedly in an attempt to calm herself. She would need to take tonight to do some yoga.
"The money is gone, I have nothing." Susan admitted, folding her hands in her lap. "This purse I'm carrying? It's leftover, I'm selling it when I leave here, it's my next stop today."
Dee shook her head, trying to process. "You're so full of shit."
"I'm being serious, Dee, do you think I would sit here and beg you to talk to me if I didn't feel like I had to?" Susan threw her hands up, feeling frustrated. "I mean christ, I know how much you hate me, why would I subject myself to that?"
Dee blinked rapidly upon hearing her conservative sister use the lord's name in vain, thinking it was probably the first time that had ever happened. She swept the thought aside, knowing that wasn't what was most important at the moment.
"So you're here for my money? You're going to have to get in line, I'm currently trying to support the daughter you've neglected for nearly seventeen years-"
"Dee. I want to help. Don't you understand? We had no choice but to give the baby to a home that we thought was going to be the best for her. Shelby isn't mature enough to raise a child, and our household wasn't going to survive without the adoption stipend-"
Dee felt ill. "It was all about money for you in the first place." Realization dawned on her. "You sold that little girl because you were what? Falling behind on your thousands of dollars a month mortgage? I'm sorry, I don't fucking understand. Who are you to speak on Shelby's maturity after admitting to me what you just did? She's a child that made a mistake, what the fuck is your excuse at your age?"
"Richard's gambling addiction," Susan tried to start again. "It was way out of control, and I couldn't take what he was doing to the family anymore. He had started drinking and getting more and more careless, he was pissing our money away. It was incredibly unsightly, and we couldn't afford to live. I couldn't keep our house from being taken, let alone could I support Shelby and a baby on top of that. The least we could do was find her a new home-"
"You sold a child to god only knows who, just to save your high income house," Dee tried to comprehend. "Have a nice life, Susan." she put her head into her hands and pressed against the bridge of her nose.
"Dee, please. I was desperate at the time. I don't have any excuses or ploys with me today. I know what I did was wrong and I would like a chance to make things right," Susan said. Not once had she raised her voice and not once had she tried to blame her older sister, but she had a feeling it was going to take more than one visit from her to start to convince Dee that she was a changing woman. "I moved from Ohio to New York, but I don't live in the city. I live alone, in a small home on Long Island. I work at a bookstore a few blocks from my house, I can make my own way. I didn't come here to ask you for money or to pretend I'm some saint. I'm here to ask you to help me look for Shelby's daughter. I'm here to show you that I'm not the same person that I was. That I regret what I've done, not only in taking the girl, but also...throughout Shelby's entire life. I want a better relationship with you and with Shelby."
"What is the catch, Dee? People don't suddenly change like that. Are you sick? Dying? Are you afraid that when Shelby becomes successful she's going to tell everyone what a horrible childhood she had?" Dee demanded to know. She hated her sister for everything she had done. The abuse, the lying, the manipulation, all of it. So why then, she asked herself, was her intuition telling her to give the woman another chance? It wasn't as if she deserved one. It wasn't as if she didn't witness the aftermath of Susan's abuse towards Shelby every single day of her life.
There was a pause where Susan focused her breathing before looking back up into her older sister's eyes. Dee looked so much like their mother, who truly had been one of the nicest women to ever walk the planet. Susan knew her mother would despise her for everything she had done.
"There is no catch," Susan said simply. "Just my sincerest apologies towards my sister and my daughter, and a promise to be better. I don't want this life anymore. I want to be better." Tears flowed freely down Susan's cheeks, a sight that Dee had only ever seen when they were children.
Dee bit her lip in thought. If she agreed to talk more with Dee, to reform any kind of relationship with her, she was betraying Shelby's trust. Shelby, whom she loved more than anyone else in this world. Shelby, whom she'd vowed to protect the moment she realized what had been happening to her. Shelby, who did not need the stress of this on top of grieving her lost child.
"Shelby can't know," Dee said after a long moments' thought. "She will never see you, she cannot know that you are anywhere near the area, and if I find out that you've reached out to her I will never speak to you again. I am not playing games here, Susan. I will meet you for coffee every other month, we will compare notes about what we have found on Shelby's daughter, and I will let you know how Shelby is doing. That is all I will do to help you. Do we have an understanding?"
Susan nodded solemnly. It was more than she knew she deserved, and she would take anything that Dee would give her.
"Now get the hell out of my office," Dee said. "I have another meeting in five minutes."
It was the first of several meetings between the sisters, and one that Dee could never erase from her memory. The guilt of the arrangement haunted her in her sleep on a regular basis...
"Aunt Dee?" Shelby asked for a third time. Thunder shook the attic again and Shelby dropped the album suddenly, the noise frightening her. She crossed her arms protectively over her chest. Her aunt had a faraway look in her eyes, and it was making Shelby's heart start to beat a little faster. What was wrong with her? "Aunt Dee! Are you okay?"
Dee blinked a few times and then took a deep, cleansing breath. "Yes, honey, I'm fine. Your mother gave those boxes to me. A while back, when she left Ohio, her house was being foreclosed...um...your dad got into some trouble with gambling and lost all of their money...they got that divorce and then your mom moved to Long Island, but she moved to a really small apartment and couldn't take everything with her, so she...so she asked me to hold onto those childhood boxes of yours. Will you excuse me for a minute?" she felt lightheaded. She practically ran down the stairs, into the kitchen to get a cold glass of water.
The heat is probably getting to you, that attic is sweltering, Dee reasoned. She downed the glass of water in one breath and braced herself against the counter. I need to find a way to tell her I'm still in contact with her mother. Gods, she's going to hate me… there's no way to get her to understand why I would possibly keep my sister in my life after everything she's done...I don't even know exactly why...Gods Cassie is going to kill me before Shelby does...I have to find that box before they do. Now is not the time to handle all of this. I thought we'd have more time...I thought they would have at least had Rachel for longer than they have before all of this came out...If only Susan and I had found her all of those years ago, this would have been so much easier…
Cassandra and Shelby starred at each other with a deep confusion at the scene they had just witnessed. It wasn't like Dee to look like a deer in the headlights. Shelby had sworn she could see her aunt's heart pounding through her shirt, and this woman was normally the opposite of anxious. She practically oozed melatonin on a daily basis, so why all of a sudden was she so freaked out over some old baby pictures?
Maybe she thinks we'll be mad at her for not telling me she had the pictures, Shelby tried to reason with herself. I'm not mad, I just don't know why she wouldn't have told me…
Corcoran's hiding something, Cassandra narrowed her eyes and watched the stairs for Dee to come back up, but she never did. And I have a feeling that whatever it is, it's got to do with Susan and Shelby. Why would she leave these pictures up here and not say anything?
Dee put her hand over her heart and felt it start to slow, practicing a breathing exercise she had been taught long ago to deal with stress. Maybe the box had already been sorted. Maybe it did have her name on it, and maybe because of that, they wouldn't go through it. So just go through the boxes with your name on it and start to take them home, Dee told herself. It should be that simple, but it won't be. You've fucked up by not saying something for this long. Gods I hope one day she'll forgive me for not telling her…
"I hope she knows I'm not upset with her," Shelby stood. She had a tense knot in her stomach. "Do you think she left?"
"I don't know," Cassandra shook her head. "Let's take her boxes downstairs I guess, we can help her move them over to her apartment. Maybe she's just tired and done for the night? It is hot up here…"
"It's pouring out, we aren't taking these boxes to her apartment right now," Shelby shook her head, picking Cadence up to stop her from knocking over a box full of school files. "But I guess we could take them downstairs…"
After getting Cadence safely downstairs and putting her in a playpen, Shelby stopped at the staircase entryway and turned to look at her aunt, who was still resting by the sink. "Aunt Dee? I'm not upset with you, I hope you know that. It makes sense that mom would give you those, and why wouldn't want to show me old baby pictures. I know that you know it's a tough subject for me. It's okay," she nodded her head towards the attic. "Come with me, we can grab your boxes and take them down here so they're ready to be moved to your place when it stops raining, yeah?
Dee nodded slowly, following her niece up the stairs. She moved to grab boxes clearly marked as hers and her heart dropped when she saw the box she'd been thinking of. She'd kept it for Shelby, that was true, but she knew its contents were much more important than some old baby pictures. It was something that Shelby would be very upset with her about, and likely for a long time. She wasn't ready to show Shelby what it was. She sucked in a breath and picked the box up, mixing it in with her pile down stairs.
Once it had stopped raining and all of her stuff was moved into her front breezeway, she released the tension in her shoulders. It had been avoided for another day, but she knew she wouldn't be able to put it off for much longer. For now, the box was with her, and its contents were still untouched.
. . .
Cassandra had finally texted her aunt around 10 pm. Dinner was long over, Cadence was settled down for the night, and Rachel was resting in her bed as well, still not feeling well from what they were starting to suspect was possibly a summer cold. Her body aching from the repeated movement of dragging boxes full of old college stuff and storage for the school up an d down the attic stairs was making her feel sort of gross, but she wanted to make sure she still got the coffee date with her aunt in, and her day was far from over despite the late hour. She had brewed a fresh pot of coffee and had locked herself in her office with her laptop propped up on the desk in front of her. After the long day they'd had, Cassandra decided that the rest of her office work could be done in sweat pants and a tank top. She also donned one of her favorite comfy blankets, wrapping it around her shoulders before she hit accept on her keyboard for her aunt's video call.
"Cassandra," Melissa spoke with a smile when the video came through. Cassandra smiled tiredly back at her and took a grateful drink of her coffee. "It's so good to see you again, and under much better circumstances."
Cassandra nodded in agreement. "Yeah, thanks for calling earlier. And thank you, for all of the help during the funeral. I'm not sure I ever acknowledged that…"
Melissa waved her hand. "No need to thank me. Truly. I wish there was more I could've done to help at the time." There was a pause between them. "Forgive my saying so, sweetheart, but you look absolutely exhausted."
Smirking at the accusation, Cassandra shrugged. "Yeah we've been trying to get Cady's room together and we've also started developing a playroom for Rachel-"
"Cady," Melissa smiled softly. "You've decided to call her that then."
"Yeah," Cassandra said, remembering that Melissa had been the one to give her the idea for the nickname. "Yeah, "Cadence" was just too big of a name for such a cute little girl."
"You're mother hated it too," Melissa noted, taking a sip of what looked like some sort of latte. "It was your father who insisted on it. God only knows why."
Cassandra shuddered at the thought. It gave her weird vibes to think that her dad had insisted the little girl be called Cadence, and upon learning that information Cady would never be called that again as far as she was concerned. Another silence fell between them as Cassandra thought about this.
"So, you're developing a playroom too?" Melissa prompted.
"Sorry," Cassandra shook herself out of her head. "Yeah, Rachel is partial to the attic instead of her actual bedroom, so we thought we'd get our stuff out of there. And I'm working on stuff for the school. I guess I have just been busy."
Melissa shook her head. Her eyes were kind, and glistening. Cassandra could tell she was really listening to her, which was a new feeling between the two of them. It was odd for the younger woman to be talking to someone who knew so much about her, but whom she knew so little about. Even as a kid, Cassandra hadn't spent a lot of time around Melissa. Of course, Melissa could get almost any information she wanted about Cassandra from the internet. Cassandra picked at her lip, feeling more vulnerable than she cared to be. She still felt like her aunt might have some hidden ulterior motive, and that trust was going to take a minute to build up between them, even if she was grateful for the older woman so far since her return in their life.
"You look more than just, "I had a long day" exhausted, Cassandra. Pardon me if I'm being too blunt, but are you at least taking care of yourself? You've been through a lot lately, you need to make sure your body is getting rest and the care that it needs." Melissa said. She was worried about her niece, but bit her tongue out of fear she had already overstepped. Cassandra didn't seem upset about her comments.
"No, I know, I know. It's just hard. How about a distraction? Tell me what you do in California? It has to be more interesting than life in Ohio…" Cassandra suggested, not wanting to focus on her own life and her own problems.
Melissa laughed, her voice like bells. "I don't think any life could be more interesting than yours, Cassandra-"
"You can call me Cassie," Cassandra butted in, having heard her full name far too many times already. Melissa nodded in understanding.
"Cassie," She smiled and her heart warmed. Already, she was able to use her niece's nickname. That had to suggest some sense of trust, surely? "Well, I used to be an accountant, and then I went to law school and practiced for a while in LA…"
Cassandra couldn't help but smirk. Another lawyer.
"...but my husband at the time didn't like that I was away all of the time, so I stopped working for a while and then I just...Never went back, after he died… he had quite a sum of money saved up and my passion for law just sort of faded...my trust in the system sort of faded, too."
That's understandable, Cassandra thought to herself. "I'm so sorry to hear about his passing," she said out loud, having not realized that her uncle had died.
"Thank you, dear." Melissa nodded. "It was a long time ago. It is hard to be alone sometimes, but I manage to keep busy, you know, here and there. Nothing like you, though."
"It's not comparable," Cassandra shook her head, crossing her legs underneath her in her office chair. "I understand completely. So what keeps you in California?"
Melissa was a little taken aback, and it was clear she'd never been asked this before.
"It's comfortable," she admitted, looking around her room. The scene behind her was that of another office, with dark mahogany bookshelves built into the back wall. "I like my home. I like the area. It's quiet. Gives me time to reflect and just...relax. I have a space to practice yoga and to meditate. I never have to force myself to slow down. I used to have to do that a lot…" she seemed to lose herself in her thoughts.
Cassandra gave her aunt a moment, picking up her coffee to take another long drink of it. She pulled a sweatshirt over her head and pulled her long blonde hair up into a bun on the top of her head, and then readjusted her legs so that one was propped up. Melissa blinked and looked back into the camera.
"You really should start finding ways to relax, Cassandra-Cassie, sorry-before life does it for you. My health declined quickly when I was a lawyer, working and stressing twenty four seven. After a while...I had to learn how to prioritize and decide what was allowed to take my energy, and where I could save that energy for later. Life is beating the shit out of you, I get it. But it's also stealing your energy, and that will soon ruin every aspect of your life. Trust me. Find the time where you can take care of yourself. You'll regret it later if you don't." Melissa said, still appearing like she was half in her daze.
Cassandra had to admit she knew her aunt was right, but she wasn't sure how to start doing that. She had thought that dancing again would be a good form of self care, and it had helped her feel better physically for sure. It had also gotten her mind off of things, for a while. But that wasn't going to be enough, and she knew that. Distractions were just that- a distraction from the things she really needed to work through.
"I hear you," Cassandra responded. "Really. Thank you. I...I've been really selfish lately. I've been snappy and rude to people who haven't done anything to me-to my family and friends that I love. I just feel so...over it all, you know? I know I have to go back to the estate and get that sorted out before classes start and I'm running out of time to do that, but I just don't have the energy to do it right now…"
"I get it," Melissa nodded. "Wait a week or so. I can keep the family off of your ass for that long at least. Most of them have been trying to call your New York number anyways. Just remember when you do go out there not to let any of them bully you, okay? That house and everything in it belongs to you, and you're the only one who gets to decide what to do with it."
Cassandra nodded slowly. For a while, she had thought that Melissa was trying to get on her good side because she wanted something from the house, and she hadn't completely ruled out that possibility yet, but from the reaction her aunt had just had to talking about self care and settling down, Cassandra was feeling confident that she didn't have anything to fear with Melissa. At least for right now.
"Well hey, listen. I want to do this again, if we can. Maybe if you have the time we could make it a weekly thing? Or even biweekly. I would love to get to know you, be more involved in your life. Cassie… you and Cady are the only family I have left."
"I would like that a lot," Cassandra agreed, willing herself not to tear up. She loathed the responsibility of being someone's only remaining family, and the realization of that was incredibly overwhelming, but she was thankful that someone in her family besides her baby sister was still showing love and kindness to her. "Thank you, Aunt Melissa."
"You can call me Mel," Melissa smiled. "If you want." she added with a shrug.
"I'll talk to you again soon," Cassandra promised. "Mel," she added, to show her aunt that she did want to try with this relationship.
As she hung up and stared down at her planner on the desk, she clicked and unclicked a pen rapidly, her mind made up. The next day she was going to call her therapist, she was going to throw herself into her family life and focus on getting those rooms set up for her girls. She was going to schedule specific office hours for school prep, and then leave it in her office and in her studio when it wasn't that time. It was time for her to stop letting her situation destroy her. She had a family to care for and a life to get back to.
. . .
Final Comments from Keeperofwords:
Yes, if you got to the end of this, I know its a lot. Thanks for sticking with us. I just want to say something. Our characters in the Fragile Universe are all special. We take special care to write them as humans. They are not perfect. They make mistakes, learn from them and love each other unconditionally.