It's funny about words. Sometimes you don't understand them at all, but the deeper meaning is still comprehensible to you. Perhaps it is in the voice speaking those words to you, soul speaking directly to soul. But anyway, sometimes you just know, even if you don't know that you know.
Excerpt from 'Ruminations Of A Master Bard'
"So," Zaerini said as the adventurers set out towards the Docks. "Think Mae'Var has noticed that his documents are missing yet?" It was a fine morning, with a clear blue sky. Pity that the stench of the slums was so strong, and that the refuse was all the more visible in the sharp sunlight.
"Very probable," Edwin said with a small shrug. "We had better be prepared for a fight when we get there."
"You know, I was a bit surprised to find you working for Mae'Var in the first place. A Thieves Guild isn't the first place I'd have gone looking for you, I'd have expected to find you…I don't know…working for some nobleman or something."
"I have certain contacts," the wizard said. "I am knowledgeable about how such organizations work. And as for nobles, the so-called nobles of Amn are hardly worth the name. The Odesseiron line is ancient and was so before these ridiculous little 'noble' families had worked themselves up to the position of 'first swine herder'."
"Say, Red!" Jan said, his blue eyes sparkling with amusement. "That actually reminds me of a story."
"Silvanus grant me patience…" Jaheira sighed.
"You see," Jan went on, "my Great-Uncle Filibus Jansen was a very skilled swine-herder. The best. He could make those pigs do the most amazing things. Stand still, jump through hoops, beg, play dead, play ham…you name it. Greatly respected he was, and people would beg for him to look after their pigs for them."
"I'm not interested in your ridiculous relatives," Edwin sneered. "I was speaking of mine, who happen to be…"
"Anyway," Jan went on, "one day Great-Uncle Filibus met this charming young lady gnome, named Rosberta Popinjay. Very high and mighty family, the Popinjays. Why, they owned ten large turnip fields all to themselves, and what more could anybody ask for? So, Filibus and Rosberta ran into each other at the annual Spitting Contest Ball, and the usual thing happened."
"Please spare us the indecent details!" Anomen said.
Jan blinked. "What's up your armor, knighty? Nothing indecent about Rosberta winning the Spitting Contest, is there? That is what usually happened. Or were you thinking of something else?"
Anomen subsided into heavy silence, blushing furiously.
"Oh," Jan said. "And Rosberta and Filibus also fell head over heels in love with each other as they shared a glass of turnip juice." He sniffed loudly. "Sadly, when Great-Uncle Filibus went to propose, it turned out that Rosberta's father wouldn't let her marry a Jansen. He had already betrothed her to another wealthy gnome, named Osric Oddlefit. Bad turnips, the Oddlefits, the entire lot of them. No appreciation of a good story. Well, this was many years ago, and Rosberta felt she had no choice but to agree."
"Poor Rosberta and Filibus…" Zaerini said. "That's so sad."
Jan nudged her cheerfully. "Ah, but the story isn't over, your Worship! Great-Uncle Filibus was a very resourceful young gnome, you see. He trained his pigs into forming a living pork pyramid, as it were, and then climbed on top of them to reach the fair young gnome's bedroom window. Well, Rosberta was very happy to see him of course, and only too eager to run away from home. They rode off into the sunset on the back of the largest pig, and that's how the Popinjay family got a much-needed injection of Jansen blood. Twelve young tots Rosberta and Filibus had, and all of them fond of pigs." Jan winked at Edwin, who was looking a little dazed by now. "They say a little swine herder blood really perks a family up. You sure you haven't got any, Red?"
"Absolutely not," the Red Wizard said, looking greatly annoyed.
"No? Pity. Let's hope you never need to rescue any young ladies then; you'd be totally stumped. But you could be wrong, them swine herders are tricky folks."
"Would hamster-herder be all right?" Minsc asked. "Minsc thinks he would enjoy that if he wasn't busy being a Hero. But Minsc will take care of pigs too if that is the best way to be a Heroic Savior of Young Ladies."
"Hey, look at that!" Rini exclaimed. "We're at Mae'Var's place already. Isn't it strange how the time flies when you're having fun?" Edwin, Anomen and Jaheira all groaned simultaneously, and then they all looked very put-out.
The gloomy building that housed Mae'Var's guild looked even more off-putting than usual. There was no guard outside, but Rini could almost feel dozens of unfriendly eyes watching her. "Everybody be really careful," she said. "Let's pretend everything's still nice and friendly but be ready for anything."
"Minsc is ready!" the large warrior cheerfully exclaimed. "Minsc is always ready. The heads of the wicked ones inside may be crammed full of evil thoughts, but Minsc will insert his trusty sword inside their ears and clean them all out!"
"Right, but at the moment…"
"EVIL BEWARE! MINSC AND BOO ARE HERE!"
"Minsc, no!" Zaerini cried out as the ranger raised an enormous foot.
CRASH!
The door splintered into a million pieces, and then Minsc rushed inside, sword raised. Surprised cries could be heard from inside, intermingled with shouts of 'Go for the eyes, Boo!" Cursing under her breath the half-elf hurried after her friend.
Inside the dark entry hall that also functioned as a bar in order to fool casual visitors, Minsc was busy battling several thieves. Individually none of them would have been a match for the large man, but they were adept at striking in just the right spot and at attacking from behind. Minsc was bleeding from several wounds already, but they didn't seem to be slowing him down, and there were a couple of corpses on the ground. Not pausing, Zaerini mouthed the words of a spell, and then the world slowed down around her, the enemies moving slowly, as if they were struggling through a swamp. Of course, it was really that she and her friends were moving faster, but it gained the same results.
She managed to fire off a couple of arrows before she had to dodge a savage blow aimed at her throat, and then there was a loud cracking sound right next to her ear as Jaheira's quarterstaff broke the jaw of one of the attackers. The man dropped to the ground like a sack of potatoes. Edwin pointed at the doorway on the other side of the room, and a large globe of red-hot fire flew from his fingertips, landing on the other side. Several shrieks could be heard. The wizard smirked with satisfaction, but then he gasped with sudden pain as a dagger found its way in between his ribs. Edwin clutched his side, looking surprised, and there was red on his fingers, something redder than his robe, something that was dripping onto the floor.
"NOOOOOO!" the bard screamed at the top of her voice, and now the fire was racing wildly through her veins, the monster within was free of its chains and out for blood. She had her sword in hand now, not a particularly rare sword, but at least a little magical, and she was standing over the wizard protectively. Dimly, she was aware of Anomen casting a spell, and of several armed men suddenly becoming very visible in their various stealthy positions around the room, something that seemed to make them very uncomfortable. Kill. Kill. KILL!
She was hardly an expert swordfighter like Sarevok had been, but that primal rage was the same, and it was driving her forward. What she lacked in strength and training she was at least partially able to compensate for with natural agility and the spell she had cast. One of the thieves was before her, and her free arm shot out, clawing at his eyes with fingernails that suddenly were far longer than they should have been. Even as the blinded man screamed and tried to protect his bleeding face her other arm took its turn, and the sword stabbed into his guts, finishing him off.
Zaerini thought she could hear something, the sound of a wild beast snarling, and twisted around, alert. But there were no more enemies standing, the last one fell as she looked on, one of Jan's crossbow-bolts firmly lodged inside his throat. Within her, the bloodlust fought for control. Kill! Kill more! Kill them all!
Then her eyes fell on Edwin, and the fires in her blood smoldered and went out. The wizard was weakly getting into a sitting position, already arguing with Jaheira as the druid administered her healing spells and protesting that he didn't have the time to be still, because clearly everybody would make a mess of things if he wasn't around to take charge. His eyes lit up as Rini hurried over to kneel beside him. "Are you all right?" she asked, hoping that she wasn't babbling. "Thanks, Jaheira, you're the best, you know that?"
"Yes," the druid said in a dry voice. "I know."
"Of course I am all right," Edwin said. "It takes more than a little scratch like that one to stop Edwin Odesseiron, glorious Battle Wizard! (Ah, that does sound nice. I hope she likes it.)"
"Actually," Jaheira chimed in with a biting look in her green eyes, "it would only have taken a few moments more to turn you into 'Edwin Odesseiron, glorious corpse'. Try not to get stabbed too often, I do not have an infinite supply of healing spells you know."
"I could have taken him! I was only…er…playing severely wounded to make him drop his guard."
"Whatever you say, Eddie," Zaerini said, smiling at the wizard. "Just try not to let it happen again, would you? I much prefer you alive, and you had me really worried there for a moment."
"Oh…ah…certainly." Edwin staggered to his feet, swaying like a tree in full storm, and when the bard swiftly moved in to steady him, he held on to her for perhaps a little longer than was necessary for medical reasons. "Though I would of course make a magnificent corpse, it would be nothing compared to me as a live wizard, my entire body filled with magical energies to enflame the senses and…"
"You are certainly full of something," Anomen said, glaring at the wizard. "And as a corpse you would at least be silent, a definite improvement."
"Yes, I expect you would know all about corpses. An inexpert healer like yourself probably has fewer living patients than dead ones. Come to think of it, have you ever treated a human being, or do you limit yourself strictly to other chimps? If you find it difficult to answer, try with one grunt for yes and two grunts for no."
"I'll treat you to a…"
"Not again!" Rini said, cutting the two arguing men off. "Can we please go downstairs and fight Mae'Var, rather than you two fighting with each other? Thank you." As she passed by Edwin on her way towards the stairs, she mouthed 'I want to talk with you later' to the wizard, who looked both surprised and pleased.
Zaerini knew to expect the worst as she once again descended the dark stairs leading towards Mae'Var's torture chamber. But as it so often is, the reality was far worse than anything she could possibly have imagined. The smell of blood was heavy in the air, the rack was fortunately unoccupied this time, but there was something else. A table, and a body had been tied to the table, very tightly, and then somebody had…gone to work on it. It was really amazing the things that could be done to a human body, the things that could be removed from it, while still leaving the person alive and conscious to feel everything. There were knives on the table, and a saw, and pincers, and some objects that looked like they could be heated up. All of them seemed to have been used, often and with great pleasure. Blood wasn't the only smell in the air, burnt flesh was competing with it. Like Irenicus, Rini thought, staring in mute horror at the still living body on the table. She couldn't even tell if it was male or female any longer, and when it moaned softly, indicating that some glimmer of life still remained, she almost threw up. Just like Irenicus.
Mae'Var was standing beside the table, holding an extra long knife. His arms were bloody to the elbows, and his sharp, bird-like eyes glimmered with pleasure as he turned to see the half-elf and her friends. "Come for me, have you?" he said. "I am not surprised. I still have friends you know, and they have told me. Come then. But first…allow me to dispose of my latest toy. I think it's time I got myself some new ones, don't you?" He stabbed the knife down into what was presumably the chest of the unfortunate victim on the table, there was a gurgling sound, and then nothing. Mae'Var laughed, a rich, deep, pleasant laugh of good cheer, as if they were sharing some kind of private joke.
Irenicus, Rini thought again, fighting the vomit down. Just like Irenicus. But no. Not exactly like Irenicus. In a flash of insight, she remembered, and she knew that what made Irenicus so especially frightening was that he didn't gloat, or laugh, or seem to take any pleasure at all in what he was doing. He simply did it, for some reason that only he knew. Whereas Mae'Var was more or less a mad dog.
And mad dogs need putting down, she thought. She prepared herself for the battle, and once again she listened to the song of the fire in her blood.
Mae'Var might have been a disgusting sadist, but he wasn't insane to the extent that it impaired his fighting, unfortunately. Worse, he had apparently gathered a few friends together when it became clear to him that enemies were on their way. As the vicious thief drew his sword, several men in dark and non-descript clothing became visible around the room. Zaerini noticed that one of them was raising a holy symbol of some sort. A cleric, then. That wasn't too good. "Keep the thieves at a distance!" she shouted. "Edwin, Jan, the spellcaster!"
The Red Wizard and the gnome got her point immediately, and they fired off a large number of Magic Missiles at the cleric just before Rini had the time to finish her own spell. A hissing green arrow embedded itself in the cleric's chest, dripping corrosive acid. The man screamed with pain and clutched at the projectile, sinking to his knees. He would be dead in moments. However, he had had the time to cast a spell of his own, and a shimmering golden light had flickered across the enemy rogues, who suddenly seemed both stronger and faster than before.
"You will hold where you are!" Jaheira cried out in a strong voice, raising her hands as she called upon the power of her god. Twisting vines erupted from the ground, scattering earth and rocks about them in small explosions as they broke through the floor. It seemed to be some sort of seaweed, probably because the ocean was so close, and the spell used what vegetation was readily available. Thick vines clutched at the ankles of the attacking thieves, tripping them up and slowing them down, making them easy prey for magic and missiles alike. Another spell from Anomen froze two of them in place, immobile like statues, not even their frightened eyes turning. They didn't last long.
Mae'Var had somehow managed to dodge the spells though, and now he was swiftly approaching. Zaerini could see the eager gleam in his eyes as he headed directly towards her, and the small flecks of foam on his lips. He seemed to be far too eager for her blood to even be bothered with trying a sneaky approach. Her jaws setting into a stubborn line, she prepared for the attack. A flame arrow right between the eyes, that's exactly what the bastard needs. I may not have been able to fight Irenicus, but I can fight this nasty little creep.
But then Minsc was there, stepping between her and the enemy, and there was a loud clang as Mae'Var's blade met with the large two-handed Sword of Chaos. "You are a very bad man!" the large ranger said. "Boo says it is time for the bad man to meet Minsc's sword. Look! It slices…and dices…and IT CHOPS BAD MAN'S HEAD OFF FOR TRYING TO HURT MINSC'S WITCH! RRRRRAARRRRRRGHHH!"
Thud.
There was a look of extreme surprise on Mae'Var's face as his head flew through the air and hit the wall, neatly dropping into the wastepaper basket that stood in one corner. For a second or two his body kept going, trying to stab Minsc in the kidneys. Then it finally realized that it was dead and fell like a puppet with cut strings.
"Thanks, Minsc," Zaerini said, staring at Mae'Var's body. Within her, the murderous fury that had risen when she first spotted the mutilated body on the table slowly faded away, leaving a feeling of emptiness behind. "I'm glad you did that, and I'm glad I didn't have to do it. What I mean is…I would have enjoyed it too much, I think, and that sort of thing can get very dangerous for me, you know?"
"Minsc doesn't," Minsc said, "but he is happy if little Rini is, and Boo is happy too."
Rini nodded, and for a moment she watched as Jaheira and Jan searched Mae'Var's body. The man had owned a lovely suit of black leather armor, unfortunately not a size that would fit the druid, but it should still fetch a nice sum, and he had some gold and gems in his pockets too. Just a little bit closer to you, Immy. Just a little bit closer. Then something Minsc had said suddenly came back to her. "Minsc? Did you call me your 'witch' just now?"
"Oh," the large man, sounding very bashful. "Minsc is sorry if he has said something bad, he did not mean to. Are you angry about it?"
"No, of course I'm not angry," the half-elf said, smiling encouragingly. "I'm your friend, you can talk to me. I'm just curious, that's all."
"Well," Minsc said, and his foot, twice the size of a normal man's, trailed shy circles on the ground. "Now that Dynaheir is…gone, Minsc has no witch anymore. I was meant to protect her you know, for my trial of manhood, and I failed, so I cannot join the Ice Dragon Berserker Lodge."
"Yes, I know that. I'm really sorry."
"But Minsc also needs a witch to look after, because that is what I was trained to do, and I need a witch to look after me, because that is what witches do, and Boo says that Minsc needs that. Boo looks after Minsc too of course, but Boo thinks it would be even better if we had a new witch. Minsc almost asked Aerie if she wanted to be his new witch, but now he is glad he didn't." Hurt confusion rose in the big man's innocent eyes. "Aerie did not seem Evil, but now Minsc knows that she is, and if he sees her again, he will let Boo do what he wants with her."
"Right…" Rini said, feeling almost as confused as Minsc. "Well, sometimes bad people don't look bad, or the other way around. Don't feel bad about being fooled by Aerie, you weren't exactly the only one. Er…what does Boo want to do with her?"
"Minsc would rather not say. It might make your tummy upset. But Minsc still needs a new witch, and then Boo asked me why I had not asked little Rini, who is a good friend and not Evil like Aerie is, and Minsc felt very silly that he hadn't thought of it. It was just that you fight with sword sometimes, and sometimes with magic, that is why Minsc did not think of it, but Boo says that doesn't matter, because little Rini already knows more spells than Dynaheir did when Minsc first met her. So, Minsc was going to ask, but then he got in the fight with the bad man and shouted without thinking. But Minsc will ask now. Will you be my witch?"
The bard felt a little stunned after listening to this monologue, but then she looked into the open and honest face in front of her. "Minsc…you do realize I'm not from Rasheman, don't you? I'm not ever going to be that kind of witch."
"Minsc knows, and it is fine. You will be a good witch, Boo says so."
"Well…if Boo says so, sure." Zaerini smiled again. "I'll be your witch, if that's what you want." She had hardly finished the sentence before she found herself swept up in an enormous hug, her ribs creaking.
"OH, GLORIOUS DAY!" Minsc shouted, tears of joy streaming down his face. "Minsc has a new witch! Hooray!"
"Yes…good…I think I need to breathe now…"
Minsc's sudden and loud exclamation had attracted the attention of all the other adventurers, who'd been busy searching the room. Jan looked amused, Jaheira a little impatient, Anomen annoyed. Edwin however, looked absolutely outraged. "What?" he shouted. "You cannot mean this! You cannot possibly mean that you're about to lower yourself to become one of those…one of those filthy witches! Don't you know what they…have you no idea…" He broke off with a frustrated noise. "They are the scum of the earth, it's as simple as that!"
Zaerini sighed. She'd been prepared for a negative reaction, but not one quite as strong as this. She'd always suspected that Edwin had personal reasons for detesting the Witches of Rasheman, apart from the rivalry between Rasheman and Thay, but he had never wanted to tell her what it was about. "Eddie, calm down!" she said. "I'm not about to become one of the Witches of Rasheman! I couldn't, even if I wanted to, which I don't. I don't want to belong to any organization. But even if I did want to, they wouldn't have me, they only accept those born in Rasheman."
"Yes, but…"
"Minsc knows that too, don't you Minsc?" She waited to see the ranger nod before she went on. "When he says 'witch' he means 'magic user', and he's used to traveling with one. Nothing sinister about it, you know."
Edwin frowned, and he didn't look pleased at all. "Very well," he said. "But I don't like it one bit. (How in the world am I ever going to explain this to…it doesn't even bear thinking about. But come to think of it, I wish I will get the chance to explain…)"
"I'm sure you'll get used to it. Anyway, I guess it's time we went back to see Renal Bloodscalp and collected our reward. But let's go outside and get some rest first, I need some sun and fresh air."
Once she had exited Mae'Var's Guild, or what had formerly been Mae'Var's Guild, Zaerini stood still on the street for a few moments, breathing deeply. After the smells of that dungeon room, it was a welcome relief. True, the salty air held a definite tinge of rotting seaweed and fish, but she didn't care at all about that. Then she turned to Edwin. "I need to talk to you alone a little," she said, taking the wizard by the arm. "Let's go down towards the water, shall we?" Then she grinned. "Don't worry. I'm not going to push you in."
"It would be no obstacle to me if you did," Edwin said. "I am a wonderful swimmer. Not that it would be necessary to actually demonstrate my prowess. (I'm sure I could master a water-walking spell, and it would be more dignified.)"
"My lady," Anomen said, frowning. "Do you really think…would not a chaperone be…"
Rini stared at him. "A what?"
A guardian of your virtue, Softpaws told her. Meant to keep you from going about your mating in peace, one of those silly human things.
I know what it is! And I don't plan to 'mate' in the street, thanks very much! And certainly not right now. I need to take things one step at a time. The time was right before, but then Edwin took off, and now I need to…I don't know…get back to where I was. I think we can, but it will take some time.
The thought of 'mating' intruded itself on her mind, conjuring a very vivid vision of the wizard and herself. She was starting to feel very hot.
Pah. You're practically about to tear his clothes off right now.
I'm not! That was a stray thought you picked up right now, not something planned.
Makes no difference. It's still what you want. You might as well go about it.
The bard was just about to make a hot and heartfelt reply when she realized that Anomen was still looking at her expectantly. So was Edwin, for that matter. So were Jan, Jaheira and Minsc. Jaheira looked exasperated, and Jan looked as if he was watching some kind of exciting game.
"No," she said. "No chaperone, thanks."
"But…"
"Anomen, for one thing, I'm not exactly a 'lady'. And I'm not Amnian, so I don't really care that much about that sort of thing. And besides, are you already forgetting that I talked to you without a chaperone only this morning? Come on, fair is fair."
"But…"
"That's right, you unwashed son of a troll and an Umber Hulk," Edwin said, smirking triumphantly as he trailed after the redhead. "And I am sure you bored her practically to tears, going on and on about your tedious and uninteresting thoughts about things you could not possibly hope to comprehend. That would be everything, in case you were wondering, except possibly how to open nuts by hitting them with a rock. (Yes, just look at that dull, vacant look in those ugly muddled eyes.) Whereas I, of course, am a brilliant conversationalist, capable of charming the birds down from the sky and…"
"Let's see you put those conversational skills to work then," Rini interrupted, taking the wizard's hand and dragging him off before Anomen had the time to work himself up for a fight. "This is rather important."
She led Edwin to a secluded spot she had spotted earlier. Broad stone stairs led down to and into the water, and right now they were dry and nicely warmed by the sun. She sat down, watching the glittering blue sea below her, and the sweeping seagulls who were fishing in the harbor. The hissing sound of the waves crashing against the stairs was very soothing. She waited until the wizard had sat down beside her before she started speaking. "I think," she said, "that it is time I told you everything about a wizard named Irenicus."
"One of the worst things was that he was so…so dispassionate about it all," Rini said a short while later, still staring down into the water. "As if what he was doing to me wasn't even important enough to make him feel anything about it, as if I was just a thing. A means to an end." She had briefly told Edwin about her capture by Irenicus, or what little she could remember of it. Now she was starting to speak of the wizard himself, and what he had done to her, but it was hard. So very, very hard, because in speaking of it she remembered, even some things that she hadn't been able to recall before.
"Are you sure you wish to do this?" Edwin asked. The wizard had been noticeably quiet over the past several minutes, simply listening, and now there was a peculiar strain in his voice. He took her hand, seemingly almost without thinking about it, and held it so tightly that it almost hurt. "I am willing to listen of course, but I…would not wish to cause you further pain."
The half-elf gave him a grateful smile in return. "No, I'll be all right. I need to tell you this, so you'll understand better in case I, well…freak out or something. It's just hard…" She hesitated, hardly knowing where to start. It hurt to remember, but the humiliation was almost worse than the remembered pain. He took us so easily. And then…he did exactly what he wanted, and I couldn't do anything to stop him. And then she knew where to begin to explain. "Do you remember Reiltar?" she asked. "Sarevok's adoptive father, back in Baldur's Gate? Do you remember when he…abducted me? And what he did?"
A cold mocking voice. Hands all over, touching and groping. Drugged, helpless to prevent it, yet awake enough to feel the pain and the shame. Crying, and ashamed even of that, of letting the shame show.
"I remember," Edwin said. His eyes were filled with hot rage, a hatred deep enough to kill, but his voice was very gentle, very soothing.
How I've missed that voice.
"This mage…" Edwin went on, picking his words carefully. "This…Irenicus. Are you saying that he…that he did what that other swine did? That he…"
Rini hastily shook her head, her red hair whipping against her cheeks. "No. At least not as far as I remember. There are…holes…in my memory still. I only mentioned that because of how he made me feel when he did the things he did. The way he still makes me feel. It felt much the same."
Edwin was finding it very difficult to control his temper. Every fiber of his being wanted to scream with rage, to kill, devastate and destroy, to completely annihilate the creature who had dared touched as much as a hair on the head of the woman in front of him. But he had to try to remain calm, at least outwardly so. He knew that she needed him to. Right now, she was looking paler than usual, and there was a suspicious shine in those large and slightly slanted golden eyes, as if she could barely keep from crying. He will pay. This…this Irenicus will pay for that. Every tear he ever made her cry will be paid for, in blood. "Tell me," he said, fighting his temper down once more.
Zaerini sighed, biting her lip a little before she went on. "He's a very powerful wizard," she said. "Frighteningly powerful. I'm not even sure if he's human or not. He always wears this mask, you see." She went on to describe the enchanted mask, the coldly perfect face depicted on it. "And his eyes are blue," she said. "So blue…the coldest eyes I ever saw." She shivered, despite the warmth in the air. "Colder than the north wind. And his voice is like…like it came from a machine of some kind. No life in it, no feeling, and yet he is living, not undead, I'm sure of that."
A demon? Edwin thought. He had never heard of any creature resembling this 'Irenicus', and that worried him more than he wanted to let on. He was an excellent conjurer and had always been fascinated with strange beasts and creatures, and it disturbed him that he didn't know what to make of this. It makes no difference, he thought. Whatever else he is, he will die. The minute he harmed her; he became a dead man walking. He simply doesn't know it yet.
"I'm not going to tell you everything he did," Zaerini said in a decisive voice. "It would only make you upset. But you need to understand what he's like…what he's capable of." She closed her eyes for a moment, and Edwin almost thought she would be unable to go on. But then she spoke again. "He wanted me to hurt, as much as possible. I still don't know why. He used knives and whips and…just think of everything Mae'Var had in his basement. Irenicus had it all, and then some." She flexed the fingers on her right hand, watching them curiously. "Once he broke all my fingers, one by one. It sounded like when you step on a twig in the forest and it snaps in two. Exactly like that." She made a little sound in her throat, halfway between a sob and laughter. "I guess he knew how important my hands are to me. And you know, I thought that I would gladly have cut off both my hands if only he'd let me go." Now it was definitely a sob. "He healed me later…I think it was a couple of days later, but I'm a little hazy on that point. He made me scream first though. He made me scream, scream until I hardly had any voice left to scream with, and he made me beg for the pain to stop, and that hurt more than anything else, and he knew that. He knew exactly what he was doing, but I still don't know why, and I still keep remembering it." By now tears were streaming down her face, her eyes were red, and she was sniffling loudly. She wiped angrily at her nose before she went on. "And I don't know which is worse, that I remember part of it, or that there are still things I don't remember."
A thousand curses had been running through Edwin's head as he heard this story, but by now he was too angry to be able to think of even one. Had he had Irenicus in front of him in that very moment he wouldn't even have been able to muster the simplest spell, he would simply have tried to choke the life out of the other wizard with his bare hands. He looked at the woman in front of him, his mind a conflicting maelstrom of swirling and conflicting emotions, and then he did the first thing that came into his head and simply gathered her into his arms, holding her tightly as she cried into his robe.
She felt small against him, something that startled him a little. Of course, he was aware that as a half-elf she was both shorter and more slender than a human, it was just that he normally didn't think of her that way. All the fire in her eyes, the restless energy in her movements conspired to make her larger than life whenever he thought of her. But right now the fires were burning low, and as he wrapped his arms around her, one hand stroking the bright red hair, he felt almost ready to weep himself, and certainly to rage against the world for daring to hurt her like this. Her hair was tousled and a little sweaty from the earlier fight, but to Edwin it felt like the finest silk, smooth and soft, and sending tendrils of soft flames through his trembling fingertips along his arm and straight into his heart. Red. So very red. So beautiful…
He longed, oh how he longed to reach down and kiss her until she could hardly breathe, and then to progress onwards from there. The desire was almost eating him alive, a raging inferno, a hurricane. But I cannot. I must not. She was upset, in pain, in need of comfort. He couldn't take advantage of that, especially not when he knew he had hurt her deeply before. Suppose something happened, but it was only because she was upset and not thinking clearly? I could not stand that, not hurting her, not hurting her ever again. My poor Hellkitten…I do not even know how she feels about me now. Once…but that was then, before I left. Now…who knows? But I will find out, and maybe I can make things right again. He frowned as he briefly considered Anomen. He didn't like the way the cleric behaved around Zaerini, not at all. Far too interested, far too proprietary. I hurt her badly…suppose she…suppose she has feelings for that armor-plated baboon? No! I will not allow it! I will fight for her if I have to, and I will win. I will have her back. I have to. I…love her.
Edwin vaguely realized that he was murmuring quietly into the half-elf's ear, softly comforting words. He was hardly aware of what he was saying, but she seemed to be responding to the tone of voice at least, and the body contact. Her sobs were gradually slowing down, turning into weary hiccups that for some reason sounded absolutely endearing to his ears. In fact, even the wet and sniffling sounds her nose was making were totally perfect and adorable. Eventually, she sat up, pulling away from him a little, and gave him a weak smile through her tears. "See?" she asked. "Told you I might freak out eventually."
"No," Edwin said, surprised that his voice wasn't trembling more than it actually was. He was still holding on to her, his arms wrapped around her waist, and he wasn't about to let go unless he absolutely had to. "No, you did not 'freak out'." He paused, uncertain how much it would be prudent to say. After all, he didn't want to upset her again. "We will find Imoen," he said. Jaheira had explained the details of the young thief's capture earlier, and he found it utterly repugnant. Imprisoned and abducted because of some accidental use of magic. Is nothing beneath these Cowled Wizards in their zeal to control all magic by themselves? "We will find her and set her free. Then we will find this…this Irenicus, and then he will find out that that he still has a great deal to learn about causing pain. I intend to give him a very extensive series of lessons, with himself as the subject. And then I'll have him resurrected so I can do it all over again."
"Thanks," Zaerini said, and some of the light was back in her eyes by now. "And…thanks for listening, and for being there. There's something else I think you should see." Hastily, she rolled the sleeve of her shirt up, baring her arm. There were several long scars marking the otherwise smooth skin. They were mostly faded, so probably at least some healing had been performed on them, but still visible if you were looking for them. "I guess the scars will always be there," she said, "but they'll fade more and more." Then she placed one slim hand across her heart. "And that goes for the ones inside as well. I'll live, and I suppose the scars will fade. Maybe one day I'll hardly remember them. Right now, they still hurt though. I just wanted you to know, to understand that I'm not quite healed yet. But now…now I know that I will be."
There was something in her eyes…something he couldn't quite interpret. Was it a question? An answer? Maybe even a promise? He was almost afraid to hope for the last, afraid of disappointment.
"You will be," he said. "If I have anything to say about it, you will be. And I am, after all…"
"The greatest wizard in the whole wide world," the bard filled in, a small and crooked grin tugging at the corners of her mouth. "Yeah. I know. And a very intimidating one as well, I might add."
"Oh. Yes. I was actually just about to say so. And I haven't even begun to list my many wondrous talents, but I wouldn't want to overwhelm you with such a vast multitude of superiority. I suppose it would be better if I demonstrated them one at a time."
By now the half-elf's eyes were definitely sparkling, and her smile was slowly getting wider. "I wouldn't dream of missing it for the world," she said, and something about that smile made Edwin feel like he was about to dissolve into a steaming puddle. It was still a very pleasant sensation though.
They sat in silence for a few moments, until Zaerini finally sighed. "I guess we'd better go back to the others," she said. "They're probably getting worried."
Edwin was tempted to explain in great lengths just what he thought the others, and especially Anomen, could do to themselves. But he could see that she had made up her mind, and that an argument would lead nowhere. Besides, he was reluctant to break the mood, and so he simply nodded and followed her, very unwilling to let go of her. They were almost back with the rest of the party when he realized just what it was he had whispered to her earlier, when he was upset and didn't pause to consider his words. She wouldn't have had any way of understanding it of course, not speaking Thayvian.
Darm kin. My heart. Aris kin. My soul. Tazurel kin. My love.
Maybe it was for the best that she wouldn't have understood. He didn't want to rush her after all, and he certainly didn't want to upset her. He didn't even know for certain if she could feel that way about him again. Yes. It is probably for the best. Edwin thought about this for a second. But on the other hand, it might be a good idea to find her a Thayvian dictionary…
Tazurel kin. My love.