It literally knocked the wind out of him when Kaiba's Blade Knight attacked Jonouchi directly, slashing him across the chest with the holographic sword. Once again, Jonouchi wondered just how the fuck Kaiba's game managed to cause people physical pain, but it was no matter. He'd wanted Kaiba to attack him. He'd been counting on it. This was how he was going to get what he wanted from the four-way duel.
Kaiba's anger was easy to count on. After Jonouchi had used Graverobber to transfer Kaiba's first attack to Marik, he'd forced Marik to the very top of the tower, knocking his life points. Unfortunately, that left Jonouchi open to another attack directly, but Jonouchi knew Kaiba was going to take that chance to try and knock him down again. She was so blinded by frustration, and Jonouchi got up, sticking out his tongue while clasping onto the dueling platform railing before spitting out a taunt at her.
"Thanks Kaiba, for getting me up to the top," he yelled.
Kaiba gave a confused look before her face transformed into one of rage.
His life points dropped to zero, and he waved at her as he was shot up to Marik. Now they'd be dueling each other, just as he planned.
"Great job, Jonouchi!" cheered Yugi from below. He looked nervous but still gave a thumbs up while Jonouchi gave his own back. Kaiba appeared to be fuming still, gritting her teeth before she finally appeared to calm down.
"No matter," she shouted, and she pointed directly at Yugi before shoving her deck back into the duel disk. "This is our fate, to duel each other. Come meet your destiny, Yugi, so we can finally have an end between you and I!"
Yugi nodded his head in agreement.
The dueling stations finally all rose to the top, and Jonouchi took relief as he finally found himself on still ground. He wouldn't lie to himself and say he wasn't nervous about fighting Marik, but he also had confidence in his deck... His deck, his skills, and the support of his friends. He'd see it through. Mai would be counting on him.
He took his place on the dueling field as Marik took his across the way. Glancing at his friends, Jonouchi gave one last thumbs up, smiling at his sister before glancing past Kaiba. She stood with her brother in the back corner of Marik's side of the field, her face impassive. Despite not showing any kind of indication of her feelings, Jonouchi knew she had to be raging inside for him having played her.
Finally.
He smirked as he shuffled his deck, feeling self-satisfied for his accomplishment.
"Prepare to be swallowed by the darkness, Jonouchi," laughed Marik from across the field, "You'll get to see Mai really soon, I promise."
"Fat chance, fuckwit," answered Jonouchi back. He got himself prepared, now only waiting for Isono to start the duel officially. "I'm gonna wipe the floor with you. God or no God card, you're going down."
Marik just smiled.
Kaiba watched from the sidelines, content to observe. She stayed away from Yugi and the peanut gallery on purpose, deciding that it would be best for now to keep her commentary to herself. As angry as she was at Jonouchi for fooling her during the four-way duel, she was reluctant to see him lose.
And he could lose.
How could a player like Jonouchi win against a God? He had nothing strong enough to defeat it. His only chance could be if Marik was unable to play it, but that didn't seem likely. Ra was more powerful than both Yugi's Osiris and her own Obelisk. It wasn't just a question of Jonouchi's talent... not this time. Anything Jonouchi might try just wouldn't be enough.
It occurred to her that this was to her advantage, anyway. If Yugi had faced off against Marik, whoever won that duel would be going against her, two all-powerful cards against her one. Those were poor odds, so it was to her favor that she was going to battle against Yugi next and get Osiris for herself.
Jonouchi is nothing more than a guinea pig.
Kaiba felt uncomfortable at the thought. It didn't sound like her voice speaking to her, but she couldn't shut it out, either.
Watch him lose and learn how to exploit Marik's dueling strategy. This is the way to win. Let the deadbeat take the fall and step on his corpse on the way to the top! That's all that matters. The victory is in your hands.
Closing her eyes hard, Kaiba rubbed her temple slowly before opening them again.
The duel had begun. Marik was threatening Jonouchi while Jonouchi strained to keep his cool. He was staring daggers at Marik, but thankfully he wasn't reacting anymore to the taunts.
Then something strange occurred. A black cloud fell over the top of the dueling tower as Kaiba looked around her, feeling a mixture of fear and confusion. What the hell was going on? More of this magic crap?!
"Nee-sama, Marik is doing something to the duel," Mokuba shouted. "Should we do something to stop him?"
"The duel has to continue," Kaiba replied sharply. "It doesn't stop for anything. These are the rules, and you know that."
Mokuba's face went sour before his eyes glared at her sharply. "I can't believe what you're saying. Someone could get killed, and you think not breaking the rules is more important? My friends are getting hurt."
Kaiba turned her head to look at Mokuba, her body tingling slightly from the sharpness in Mokuba's voice. Usually he never spoke to her confrontationally, and she felt slightly ashamed. It wasn't Kaiba's intention to get anyone killed, after all.
The match MUST continue.
"Jonouchi wants to duel Marik," Kaiba reasoned. "Why should I stop him from doing what he wants? That's not my place, and it's not my job to protect him from himself."
Mokuba opened his mouth like he wanted to say something but he didn't. His eyes still remained sharp though, and Kaiba could tell that he was disappointed in her. She hated the feeling. It was so rare.
"What am I supposed to do, kid?" She argued. "It's too late to stop them even if I had wanted to."
Jonouchi attacked Marik with his Panther Warrior. Marik gasped in pain, and Mokuba's face light up, his fists going in the air as he whooped in support of Jonouchi. "You can beat him, Jonouchi! Take that creep down!"
Kaiba was in disbelief.
Jonouchi and Marik had traded barbs just as much as they traded blows. Marik seemed irritated each time Jonouchi called him 'Marik-chan'. They threatened each other and demeaned each other and neither side appeared ready to let up.
But then things turned south quickly as Jonouchi walked into a trap. He had tried to play smart by reducing Drillago's attack points to 1100, but then Marik played 'Card of Last Will', which allowed him to draw five cards to his hand.
Any of those cards could have been Ra.
It got worse when Marik played 'Coffin Seller'. Jonouchi's life points would take a 300 point hit each time a monster of his went to the graveyard. He was going to sink fast. As much as Kaiba tried not to care about who won or who lost, she couldn't help but feel a twinge of fear as Jonouchi's duel started to veer away from his favor.
Although she knew it wasn't possible for Jonouchi to win. There was just no way.
"This doesn't look good for Jonouchi," muttered Mokuba quietly.
Kaiba looked down at him, frowning slightly. "I'm not surprised."
It was Jonouchi's turn to draw. His face appeared apprehensive, and he hesitated before pulling out a card, stretching out his hand away before turning his head and smiling. He appeared pleased. Mokuba started to clap his hands, and Kaiba could feel herself becoming irritated. What was he trying to pull?
"Marik-chan, now the goddess of luck smiles on me!" Jonouchi declared. "I play my magic card, Quiz!"
Quiz is a tricky sort of card. Marik would have to guess which card was at the bottom of his graveyard pile to remove that card from play for the rest of the game, but if Marik was wrong, Jonouchi would be able to summon that card directly onto the field. Kaiba hated Jonouchi's gamble strategies, but she knew this time they were paying off.
Marik was in trouble, and his face didn't try to hide it. He'd missed on what cards had gone to Jonouchi's graveyard from earlier play; his monster 'Helpoemer' had stolen them but Marik wasn't able to see which cards Jonouchi had lost. Clenching his fists, Marik was fuming were he stood, Jonouchi laughing from his trick before he summoned Jinzo.
"Now your trap cards don't work, Marik-chan!" he declared. Mokuba whooped again, joined by the rest of Jonouchi's band of friends. Kaiba didn't react, but internally, she was pleased. At least he had a chance again, as long as Jinzo remained on the field.
Jonouchi's main opposition was destroyed as his Rocket Warrior was freed, Marik's Coffin Seller was wrecked, and so was Marik's face down card.
Yugi grinned as Jonouchi gave him a thumbs up. "Let's meet in the finals," he yelled, and Yugi nodded his head.
'Like hell', thought Kaiba. As if she was just going to roll over and die without a fight. She refused to lose to Yugi, and she definitely wouldn't allow Jonouchi to place higher in her competition than herself.
Her thoughts were torn from her when Marik began to crackle. It started small and grew, his voice echoing through the dueling field until he nearly appeared possessed.
"Good try, meatsack, but I drew my card, 'Lava Golem!"
"Lava Golem?" echoed Jonouchi.
It was an eight star card. How the hell could Marik play a card like that without sacrificing? Unless... Jonouchi was about to be in trouble again, Kaiba could feel it. Marik had been merely thrown off by Jonouchi's earlier play, but not beat.
"You can't play that monster without a sacrifice," started Jonouchi in an angry rage. "What do you think you're doing?!"
"Oh, but I am going to use a sacrifice, Jonouchi!" Marik began chuckling again. "I'll use your own cards! Haha, I hope you enjoy this monster! 3000 attack points, and he's all yours!"
Jinzo was gone, as well as Jonouchi's earlier play, Baby Dragon. In its stead came a steel cage, on fire, that fell on top of Jonouchi. Shizuka screamed and Jonouchi appeared panicked. He appeared stunned, and even Kaiba was taken aback before she recovered.
"Nee-sama, I don't get it?"
"All of Lava Golem's weaknesses become Jonouchi's weaknesses," she explained. "He's doomed."
"Use the monster against me, Jonouchi!" taunted Marik. "Attack me if you have the balls to!"
He said this as he played another trap card before ending his turn. Kaiba didn't think it was a good idea. The cage was melting, and bits of molten steel was starting to drop in globs right above Jonouchi's head.
Jonouchi was in quite a predicament. If he attacked, Marik would strike back hard. But if Jonouchi decided not to do anything, he would lose life points. He was in a Catch 22, likely to get fucked no matter what he did and Jonouchi appeared to know it. Jonouchi's dueling was unpredictable enough that even Kaiba couldn't make a safe bet on what he'd do. It would come as a surprise.
She hated surprises.
"Fuck it, I attack," Jonouchi called out, breaking the silence. His face appeared apprehensive. Kaiba knew he knew what was going next...
"Great, just as I was hoping for," Marik nearly squealed, "You make this so easy, Jonouchi. I play my trap card, Monster Relief!"
Marik's prior monster, Plasma Eel, returned to the field in defense mode, taking Lava Golem's attack. But the card would remain; it couldn't be destroyed in battle.
"Well aren't you fucked indeed," laughed Marik
Another glob of metal fell down on Jonouchi, and he lost another 700 life points.
"This is horrible," Mokuba complained. "What if he dies?"
"He's not going to die," argued Kaiba. "Just watch the duel."
Mokuba glared at her again. She knew she was being judged. Usually she didn't care what people thought of her but it was different when Mokuba was the one putting her actions under the microscope.
Nee-sama, you should hear yourself. You're too callous."
Kaiba opened her mouth to respond, but she was unable to. What could she say to that? That she wasn't wrong for feeling that way? Mokuba would just tell her that she sounded more like their adoptive father than herself, and Kaiba did not want to hear that. Not from her brother. She didn't even want to go there with him...
Marik hadn't even played Ra, and Jonouchi was losing! She expected more than that out of him. Why was he taking such a beating? Walking into Marik's dirty traps? After all this time, would he know better?
Her thoughts were broken again when Marik's laugh cut through the duel.
"I never thought you'd last long enough to face a God card," he declared.
Kaiba snapped her head, attention back fully as she waited in anticipation. This is what she was here to watch. This was the point of everything! What she needed to learn to beat Marik herself and become the best Duelist in the world.
Gain back your pride, Kaiba.
Mokuba was stunned. Everyone was stunned.
A tiny jolt went through Kaiba's body, and she could only describe it to herself as thrill. She watched the monster appear, a reborn cross rising in front of Marik before it burst into Ra itself. Then Marik attacked, and with Jonouchi stuck in the cage, he had nowhere to go.
The cries of pain were awful. Mokuba covered his ears, his face tightening again before he exploded into a cry of anger.
"Nee-sama, this is nuts! Marik's crossed the line! You need to stop the duel before Jonouchi becomes hurt!"
If you do, you'll lose everything. EVERYTHING.
"He'll be fine!" Kaiba shouted at Mokuba. She was nearly done with him. Damn the kid and his sensitivities. "I need to see this. How else can I learn how to defeat Ra? If you don't have the stomach to watch, then leave. I'm done being guilted by you."
Mokuba's face looked hurt. His eyes were watering, and Kaiba took a step back. What the hell was she saying? Mokuba was right, Jonouchi might die. She could hear the screaming, and when it stilled, she looked out into the arena, fear starting to settle into her stomach.
What if he did actually die?
Don't be weak!
The smoke surrounding where Jonouchi had been standing was starting to clear. Kaiba gasped.
How the fuck was he still standing?
"He defeated God? Him? That deadbeat nobody?"
She felt like her guts had dropped to her feet. How was he still fighting? What the fuck was he made of? There was no way possible-
He drew Gearfried the Iron Knight. "I summon-" Jonouchi's legs started to wobble and he looked at his duel disk in a blur of confusion before his knees buckled. Anzu screamed, and Mokuba started leaping towards the dueling platform, evading Kaiba's drip. He was running towards Jonouch, but it was too late. He'd collapsed, and Kaiba could feel her head spinning.
Was he actually going to die?
"Someone call for the doctor!"
Kaiba recognized as Mokuba's voice. Standing there numbly, she felt unable to move. What was she supposed to do? Why did she allow this to happen. Jonouchi lost the duel, certainly, that had been her original plan, but...
This was ugly. She felt ugly.
"-He's not breathing!"
When Jonouchi opened his eyes, there was nothing to see at first. He was struck with confusion, but that quickly escalated into panic when he couldn't get a sense of anything. He thought there were sounds and smells, at first, but when his brain tried to identify them he wasn't sure if they were imagined or not. Then he was overcome with a horrible sense of drifting. There were no landmarks, no stimulation; just an empty blackness with no up, down, or any other direction that he could determine.
As a kid, like most kids, he'd thought being in space would be cool, but if it was anything like this he'd have to seriously reevaluate his idea of 'cool'. He felt sick, and with nothing to grasp that was familiar or without any way to even knew if his own hands were in front of him, he was paralyzed. It was as his crippling panic came to a head that he started sprinting, not sure if he would even land on something when he started stretching out his legs. At this point, he could have been falling down or flying up and Jonouchi wouldn't have been able to tell.
But charging forward saved him. He knew there was ground, or something solid, beneath his feet. He still couldn't see or hear-his rapid footsteps made no noise, and he had no evidence that he was advancing except the effort it took to run and the traction of his foot creating momentum to throw him forward. Whatever was happening, he wasn't about to have a nervous breakdown alone in the dark. He'd seen some freaky shit since he started hanging out with Yugi, so God only knew where this would end, but the earth was round. If he ran far enough, he'd find something.
It turned out he was right. Slowly, a point on the horizon appeared. Within a couple of minutes, he was able to confirm that it wasn't a hallucination. He wasn't sure how much longer after that it took for him to run close enough for a shape to be determined, but he wasn't tired, so he kept going. At some point, he realized that whatever he saw was rapidly moving toward him. It didn't occur to him that it might be dangerous until it was almost upon him, and all he saw was the fast, blurred motion of dizzying patterns surrounding him as he skidded to a halt.
He blinked in surprise as sensations came back with unpleasant swiftness. He looked at his feet and saw the shoes he'd been wearing in school since he was fifteen, stark white against the backdrop of tile that was intended to hide as much dirt as possible. Around him were student lockers lining the walls seemingly forever, but he knew better. He walked through this hallway every day. Somewhere near the end, where it forked off, there was a principal's office where he'd spent so much time. Jonouchi used to think they all should have been on a first-name basis. And still further was the first homeroom he'd barely seen because of how much he'd skipped.
Jonouchi had no inclination to go near either of those places. He didn't know why he was at school, but he supposed it was better than being at home. However, he still didn't understand why he was at school in the first place and didn't have a scrap of a memory to run on that could explain the situation. The hallways were eerily empty, so he couldn't tell whether class was in session or not, but he knew he had to find his friends somehow.
Jonouchi didn't have to wrack his brain to decide to go to the student library. His friendship group met there very frequently during study hall hours or after school when they were doing homework, and even if his friends were still in class, they would migrate there eventually. The worst he'd have to do was wait for a while.
Overlooking the fact that he might get caught cutting classes, he walked to the library at such a speed that he could have still been running. When he entered, he saw no one inside except for one lone librarian. He didn't pay much attention to librarians unless he was doing something untoward on the computers, but in this case a shock of long, blonde hair got his attention. He turned and looked at the woman, who was sitting with extreme boredom at the counter, her attention deep into a trashy romance novel with her elbow rested on the wood. He recognized her right away.
"Mai?" He thought he was shouting, but the sound was very quiet to his own ears. Why couldn't he speak clearly? What was going on exactly?
The woman placed the book down before looking up at him.
"Jonouchi?"
Mai blinked, a smirk widening across her face.
"Now aren't you a sight for sore eyes! What are you doing here? Did you skip class just to come see little old me?"
She wagged a finger for him to come over. Jonouchi obeyed, any hesitation chased away by the fact that she was the first person he'd seen in... he didn't remember how long, exactly.
"I dunno," he shrugged. He probably seemed like he was trying to be one of those cool kids who 'didn't care', but he legitimately had no idea whether he'd skipped class or not. "Why are you working here? Were you really making so little from your career that this was better? Or did you get bored and decided to come find me?"
Her facial expression remained amused.
"I don't know Jonouchi, you tell me." Mai winked before bending over her desk, resting her chin in her hands. "This is your dream. Why am I here?"
"How should I know?" Jonouchi countered, feeling immediately nervous. The question was strange, but he was more nervous because suddenly he realized that Mai's clothing was not really appropriate for her position, and it was clearly intentional. Her breasts were pressing against the counter, cleavage clearly visible through the cut of her low v-cut shirt. He could see the outline of her black lacy bra against her large breasts, and even from the front he could see that her skirt was riding up. Jonouchi glanced towards her rear end and saw a thong sticking out, and he knew she had to be wearing high heels.
"Because it's your dream, silly," Mai continued, twirling a lock of hair in her fingers before making a face and blowing air from irritation. "You brought me here, buddy, so you should know. Do you have a thing for librarians, or are you just lonely for me since I went away?"
"I-" Jonouchi tried to reply, but realized he wasn't sure what to say and stopped to think it over. Mai raised an eyebrow. He didn't know what to say at first; suddenly, the memory of her duel with Marik returned to him. Here she was now, back before him so he could tell her how bad he felt about everything that occurred between them, but according to her, she wasn't real. He sighed.
"I do miss you, Mai," Jonouchi continued, because it was the closest he was going to get to telling her the truth, "Not really into the librarian thing, though. Kinda cheesy. I thought you had more sophisticated tastes."
He smirked at that. Even now, he couldn't help teasing her. It was too much fun for him. That said, he hoped it served as an indicator that he wasn't receptive to her advances.
But she kept trying, with constantly increasing aggression.
Mai pulled back her hair, letting it cascade down her right shoulder before rolling her eyes. "Since this is your dream, I could technically become anything you want me to be. Have you ever thought about that? Didn't you used to dream about opportunities like this back on Duelist Kingdom?"
"Uh… yeah, I used to," Jonouchi stammered, embarrassed but unable to avert his eyes from hers. "That's not really important, though. Not to me, anyways."
"Mai thinks it's important. The real Mai."
Jonouchi deflated. He didn't want to think about that, and if he could avoid ever thinking about her in any kind of sexual way again, he would. But with Mai, it nearly felt unavoidable sometimes. Suddenly it became very easy for Jonouchi to not meet her eyes.
"I wish she didn't," he stated, his voice so quiet that he could barely hear himself, "I can't give her what she wants. I want us to just remain good friends. I wish she'd understand that."
"Is it because of Kaiba?" Mai winked before getting up, crawling on top of the counter on her knees before sitting at the very edge of it, legs crossed and skirt hiked up to her upper thighs.
"Look, I get it," Mai continued with a small laugh she she flipped back her hair. "She's rich and beautiful and you like it just a little bit when she gives you a hard time. Wasn't that the reason why you used to like me?"
"It was," Jonouchi admitted.
"But we both know that Kaiba doesn't want you." Mai picked at a nail with a small smile on her face. "Might not ever. And you'd still give all of this a pass?"
Jonouchi unconsciously took a step back. The level of tension between them when she was that close was getting unbearable. He felt a heavy air of expectation that he didn't want to deal with. Honestly, he'd always felt that way around her. Like Mai was waiting to get something from him.
"Maybe I'm stupid for passing her up, who knows?" He conceded. "But you're not real. The real Mai knows she's more than a consolation prize. I know she likes me, but do you really think she'd want to date me knowing I want someone else?"
"You might be surprised." Mai giggled, her hand covering her mouth for half a second before she dropped it again and attempted to adjust her clothes. "Women like Mai aren't used to giving up on what they want. It's a foreign concept to them, from years of getting exactly what they want from everyone around them.
"What does Kaiba have that to offer you besides heartache and disappointment?"
"Plenty, if she decided she wanted me," Jonouchi frowned. "She's got her issues, but I've seen her with her brother. I know what she could be.
"If you want to talk about heartache-that's all I could offer Mai. I'm sick of everyone pressuring me to want more. It would be so much easier if my friendship was enough. She deserves someone who's going to worship her and give her the life she wants. Like-I dunno, maybe a guy her own age, a successful type?"
He huffed a little bit. Jonouchi felt bad, but a small (very small) part of him was irritated by the expectations Mai had of his own potential. Like she was trying to groom him for something.
"I'm just eighteen," Jonouchi stressed. "I want to play Duel Monsters for a living. I want to make mistakes, do stupid things, and have fun with my friends. She needs someone who can support her and wants to surround her with nice things and take her places... I can barely support myself, much less anyone else."
"Are you ever going to tell her this?" The Mai in front of him frowned before letting out a heavy sigh. "One day, you'll have to, Jonouchi. You'll have to be ready to disappoint her."
"I know,," Jonouchi grumbled stubbornly, knowing he was being confronted with the fact that he hadn't-in so many words-let Mai down yet. Then he took a deep breath and reminded himself that he wasn't a pussy. He could do this. "Yes. I'm going to tell her. I have to. Otherwise, I'm just stringing her along..."
"I hope you get that chance, Jonouchi." Mai smiled before getting up, her heels clicking as she walked over to Jonouchi to ruffle his hair. Jonouchi dropped his head and quickly tried to fix his mess of yellow hair, his hands waving wildly all over the top of his head before he looked back up.
Mai was in her normal clothes again, walking towards the double doors that led to the hallway.
"I'm so glad we had this chat. Maybe next time you see me, you'll make this real?" Her face looked so hopeful. Jonouchi frowned.
"When Marik has been defeated and you've recovered from your coma," Jonouchi muttered. He wasn't sure if he'd ever see Mai again. "I'll tell you. I can't promise when, but I'll tell you."
Mai grinned and gave a thumbs up before leaving the library, the doors rocking back and forth off their hinges before they stilled. There was silence again. Jonouchi couldn't even hear his own breathing.
He found he was unmotivated to move, but he forced himself. He had to find somewhere to sit, or at least a quiet place to think. Or, a noisy place to think. It was so still, his hair was standing on end. Maybe he'd go sit under a air conditioning unit and then at least the lucid dream could be bearable with a slight breeze and lulling whum.
He selected a row of shelves to walk through at random, and found they went much deeper than he'd expected. He wasn't concerned though; it was a dream, wasn't it? Nothing that bad could happen. He continued wandering, hoping to find a place to sit that was halfway comforting, but he got the distinct sensation he was lost. When he looked back over his shoulder, he determined that it was too late to go back. He'd never find his way through.
Jonouchi was starting to get frustrated when he heard something. It was slow, occasional, but consistent turning of pages. He found it hard to navigate toward, since the bookshelves in the aisle were now like a maze full of dead-ends and trick turns. Jonouchi had always been shorter than the shelves, but now they stretched so far overhead that the tall, narrow passageways created an illusion of someone hanging over his shoulder. Jonouchi suppressed his uneasiness and clinged to his sanity as he continued towards the continued rhythm of page turning.
Finally reaching the source of the sound, Jonouchi stopped. The maze of shelves let out into a secluded reading corner that boasted an armchair well beyond the school's budget with a matching ottoman, and a reading lamp that had no right to be there when there were endless rows of fluorescent lights on the library's ceiling. The carpet here was deep red and plush.
Those were things he noticed peripherally; his eyes settled first on the feminine figure sitting in the armchair, blue eyes scanning the pages of a leather-bound book faster than Jonouchi had ever seen anyone be able to read. He knew it was a dream, but he still felt his pulse quicken and nervousness fall over him as he watched Kaiba in silence. His vision only fixed on her deep, shrewd eyes for a fraction of a second, though-the shape of a large, shadowy hand imposing itself on her shoulder made him double-take right away.
He thought it was a trick of the soft lamplight at first, but when he looked again, he was forced to accept that there was a large, broad-shouldered figure standing beside her. It was like a ghost or shadow ghoul, a shape recognizable as human but so obscured and twisted that it couldn't be. Jonouchi's mind raced, and he tried to identify details about what he saw so he could figure out how to defend himself and Kaiba from it, but then it was gone. He hadn't even blinked. It just wasn't there anymore. Maybe it never had been.
Kaiba paused, her eyes peering away from the book before she raised them up and looked at Jonouchi directly, her pupils constricting before she slammed her book down on her lap.
"What are you doing here?" she demanded. "Did you sneak into my house?"
"I couldn't manage that even if I wanted to try," Jonouchi replied. He omitted the details that he had tried, a long time ago, but wondered if Kaiba (dream Kaiba) knew that already. Because logically she should know everything he knew. Maybe she was prompting him to admit what he'd done. He'd think about it... eventually. "I didn't mean to come here. I was just looking for somewhere to relax."
Not that he could necessarily relax around her, but there was a second puffy armchair with his name on it. It was his dream, after all. He was entitled to a good seat.
He realized when he sat down facing the direction from where he'd come from that the maze had given way to a regular, if still towering and archaic, library. He recognized immediately that it was a private collection, and it only made sense that it was Kaiba's. The whole room was so large that even the multitude of enormous shelves brimming with what Jonouchi could only imagine were books of culture and knowledge seemed to over shadow him. He felt almost surrounded by them, as if they were gatekeepers and he was an intruder. The room was enormous; he could see why Kaiba chose to sit secluded in the corner.
"I think you should leave," Kaiba began again, her eyes becoming more intensely focused on Jonouchi before she looked back at her book on her lap. "You don't belong here..."
"Why not?" Jonouchi challenged. "This is my dream. If you can manage to fit in here, why can't I?"
Kaiba paused and glared at him. "You're a delinquent. I'm an heiress. There is no place for here so stop trying to force yourself into my life."
"No one's trying to force anything on you, Kaiba," Jonouchi argued. "I'm not trying to chase you."
"Then why are you here?"
Jonouchi bit his lip at the question. He couldn't help it if he thought about Kaiba all the time. What was he supposed to do, just shut off his heart? Maybe Kaiba could manage to live like that, but he couldn't. Even if it was painful, Jonouchi still wanted to feel everything. He couldn't turn off his feelings, and he didn't want to pretend anymore like he didn't care about Kaiba either. He had no right to expect her to ever return his feelings, but he shouldn't have to apologize for having them either.
It wasn't his fault for ending up in her library of all places.
"I was looking for a way out," Jonouchi tried to explain, "And I saw you. I wanted to help you."
She began shaking her head, long dark bangs swaying around her cerulean eyes.
"You help me?" Kaiba gave a little dismissive laugh before glancing back at her book, "You are delusional, Jonouchi."
Jonouchi could feel himself becoming defensive. His chest felt tight; he could feel a fight brewing in the horizon. He knew he shouldn't bite back but he wasn't going to let Kaiba berate him. She could get over herself.
"Being a little deluded is what keeps me going," Jonouchi reasoned nonchalantly. A part of him was stung by Kaiba's words. Maybe he was overly assertive about being in her presence. Then again, Jonouchi reasoned that Kaiba only really understood assertive behavior. Being apologetic and meek wouldn't get anywhere with her. He'd watched for years how she'd treated Yugi. Sure, they spoke sometimes, but outside of duel monsters, she never took him seriously. Being overly assertive was the only way he was going to make it with her, even if that meant stepping on her toes some. Kaiba respected people who pushed back on her a little, Jonouchi knew that much.
"I'm not trying to invade your space, Kaiba," he continued, looking at her with a steady gaze. Her own gaze was unforgiving, but the knit sweater and wool skirt she wore gave her an unusually softer look that detracted from the usual intimidation he felt around her. "Someone else was in here with you. If I leave, I don't know where I'd be going, and that thing might return. Hate me if you want, but I'm not leaving you here alone to get hurt."
Kaiba raised an eyebrow, her mouth turning into a slight frown. "What are you talking about? I was here alone," she replied in a tight voice. "Stop making up stuff and just leave already. I don't need you trying to play hero for me, I can protect myself just fine."
When Jonouchi just sat there feeling slightly jilted, Kaiba got up from her seat and gestured with her right hand a sweeping motion towards the door.
"Do I need to draw you up a map to get you out of here faster?"
"What is your problem, Kaiba?" Jonouchi shouted, now realizing that Kaiba was going to be just as hostile in his dreams as she was in real life. "What exactly have I done to you recently to make you decide you can't stand to be around me? You always say you don't need my help, but sometimes you do..."
Images flashed through his mind of all the times he tried to help Kaiba previously, and he felt the rising heat of anger growing inside of him.
"I could understand it if you were indifferent to me," he continued, now standing, but he had no intention whatsoever to leave. "But you're always gunning against me! More than Yugi, even! More than Marik! Who-if you don't remember-kidnapped your brother! Do you seriously hate me more than him?"
Jonouchi was used to applying his height as an advantage in an altercation, but Kaiba wasn't that short for a girl. Even without shoes, he only surpassed her by a short few centimeters. She knew it, too. She didn't even bother to tilt her head up while she looked at him impassively.
"Or are you just determined to prove that you don't need my help'?" He continued to be confrontational. "Today, I was trying to fight Marik to save you and you tried to take me out. What gives?"
Kaiba took a step forward, shoving her weight into him. "I don't want to be saved, I don't need to be saved. Not by you, or Yugi, or anyone else. I can fight my own duels and I never asked for your support. I wanted to fight Marik; you should have stayed out of my way. If you only had just wanted to save Mai, that would have been one thing...
"But you always have an ulterior motive and you can't even own up to it when asked! You said you wanted to face Marik to save Mai, but that was a lie. You can't even be honest about your intentions to your friends, but you want to be angry because I don't want your help?" Kaiba crossed her arms and shook her head.
Jonouchi blushed for a multitude of reasons, but mainly because Kaiba was calling him on his half-truths,. Also, he could still feel the shadow of her knit sweater against his skin. Even while arguing, he couldn't help but notice how close they were to each other.
"I knew how you'd react if I openly told you," he muttered as a weak defense. Yes, he had known that he was playing white knight again. To an extent. But he wasn't looking for her to reward him for his actions. Still-maybe Kaiba had a point. She had a right to her own battles, didn't she? Hard as it was to even think about what could happen if she had lost…
He looked at Kaiba, who was watching him expectantly. She didn't have the scathing glare she wore before. Just drowning, she looked like a regular person. She was a regular person. He was still having trouble wrapping his mind around it, despite Yugi's advice.
"Why are you so hard on me all the time?" He demanded. "You can be cool with me one moment, and then turn on me the very next. Like this morning, when I tried to talk to you. I don't understand what the fuck you want from me. What am I supposed to do to make you like me?"
"Nothing," Kaiba replied indifferently, "There's nothing you can do to make me like you. You don't deserve any kind of special treatment from me just because you have a crush."
"Expecting basic respect from you isn't special treatment," Jonouchi snapped, "It's not just me you're ugly to either. Christ Kaiba, it's not right to attack people when they are trying to talk to you. Last time I tried to have a conversation with you, you just got angrier with me until you couldn't dodge my questions anymore and then blew me off. The next time I was within ten feet of you, you rammed into me like you thought it would intimidate me."
He paused as he recalled that. It had intimidated him. Jonouchi didn't even know why; Kaiba was just a woman, after all, but she scared the hell out of him. It hadn't occurred to him in a while that she wouldn't be afraid to lay hands on him, so to speak. She wasn't anything like the other girls he'd grown up around. He knew she could handle herself in a confrontation and he never wanted to push Kaiba to that point.
"But what pisses me off the most is that I know you don't treat me like other people," accused Jonouchi. "I know for a fact that you don't. You reserve an extra special amount of hostility towards me, and I don't deserve it. I've never been anything but nice to you."
"That's all well and good," Kaiba replied, "but just because you're nice to me doesn't mean you deserve my attention. It doesn't work like that."
"I don't deserve your hate, either," Jonouchi replied defeatedly.
Kaiba paused before her features softened just minutely, barely enough that Jonouchi almost missed it.
"I don't hate you, Jonouchi. I would have let you drown at that pier if I hated you."
Jonouchi was sobered. The pier was where his mind always ended up when he tried to write Kaiba off as amoral. It was the only consistent, solid evidence he had that she didn't hate him-moreover, it was the only halfway decent evidence he had that she liked him, let alone cared about him.
"I don't understand how you can save my life one day and lash out at me the next," he sighed, "I mean, I could just tell myself you're nuts and leave it at that, but I know that's not right."
Kaiba's face darkened at those words. "I'm not the crazy one here."
"Since the day I met you, you've been acting like you hate me," Jonouchi argued, raising his hands up in defense. "You say you don't, so crazy is the next best guess I have."
"Is that what you call all women you don't understand?" Kaiba declared. She gave Jonouchi a hard shove on the chest before getting up in his face. "Do me a favor and go fuck yourself already."
Jonouchi's face twisted when he felt Kaiba's hands on his chest shoving him back. It hurt, more than he tried to let on. Despite Kaiba being so slender, she was surprisingly strong. If she had hit him any harder, Jonouchi was afraid he might have lost his breath.
"Maybe I'd understand you if you didn't attack me every time I talk to you!" Jonouchi retorted, feeling defensive as he crossed his arms over his chest. "When I try to bury the hatchet with you, Kaiba, you get worse-hell, you're doing it right now! Why are you always like this? Why are you always trying to fight me?"
Kaiba snorted before shaking her head. She was beginning to laugh at him. It wasn't a humored laugh, though. It was a pity laugh.
"Why am I fighting you, you ask?" She mocked, and a slender finger pointed to her chin before her eyes darkened. "Oh I don't know, how about you ask yourself? You made me this way. This is how you see me! I'm not even really here, Jonouchi, but boy do you enjoy making me out to be some crazy bitch in your own head. No wonder the real Kaiba doesn't want you.
"Maybe if you didn't tip-toe around like a coward and could actually stand up to her like a man, she'd have some kind of respect for you. How long are you going to hide your feelings? Just continue sitting around obsessing over her and getting angrier and angrier until you explode? Hmm?" Kaiba paused before pointing to herself, "Since when am I expected to be some kind of mind reader and just know your damn feelings?"
"How am I supposed to tell you how I feel?" Jonouchi asked as a distraction from the fact that he knew she had a point. It wasn't dissimilar to what Yugi had told him, but Kaiba (even in his dreams) had no tact to spare for him. "Just looking at you makes me mad half the time. What am I supposed to do, sweep you off your feet while you're verbally abusing me?"
"Who says I'd verbally abuse you?" Kaiba clicked her tongue before taking a step forward. "You always assume the worst of me. You can't lie and say you don't."
Jonouchi opened his mouth to retaliate, but there was nothing to say. He had no argument for that. He entered every conversation with her with the expectation that she was going to be nasty to him.
Even if he'd had an argument, his mind would have blanked anyway. Kaiba was so far into his personal space bubble that his skin was tingling with the anticipation of contact. The thought flashed through his mind for the barest fraction of a second that he should touch her already, but he convinced himself not to. He wasn't totally sure though for how long he could keep himself from trying, though.
"You're right," he admitted, no longer angry enough to defy her for the sake of doing it, "I know I do those things..."
Jonouchi stared into her eyes. He felt them on him, and because he didn't want to risk looking anywhere he shouldn't, he didn't stray away.
"I don't want to put myself out there and end up getting hurt," he frowned. It was stupid excuse, considering he still got hurt by her frequently. "No more than you do, anyway. Someone has to give, eventually."
He knew it wouldn't be her. Why would it be? All things considered, he didn't have the right to expect her to lay herself bare at the risk of emotional pain and her reputation for him. He had his own problems, but he knew enough about her to know hers were more considerable than his were.
"What would you do if I told you?" He asked. His voice was low. Kaiba was close enough to hear him perfectly well, regardless.
"I don't know what I'd do," Kaiba replied quietly, "Isn't that the big question? You won't know until you do it. You have to want this enough to do something or get over it."
Jonouchi frowned slightly. That was the ultimatum he had been avoiding for quite some time, but it was undeniable. He had the feeling the deadline was looming fast.
"I'm never going to get over it," he stated in defeat, "So I have to do something."
"Yeah?" Kaiba answered. "Something like what?"
Her arms were folded against her chest and Jonouchi could feel her elbows just lightly poking into him. It was delivered as a challenge. Jonouchi met her relentless eyes, and felt her elbows starting to press into him. His pulse quickened, as did his breathing. If she noticed, it didn't give her cause to back down.
"I'll have to tell you the truth," he suggested, "That I'm in love with you and I have been ever since I saw just how much you cared about your brother... When you tried to save him at Duelist Kingdom."
It sounded insane when he said it aloud, but those were the facts. Seeing Kaiba's reunion with Mokuba had changed everything for him. She'd cared about him so much and Jonouchi had seen how hard she had tried to get him back. How she had risked everything for him.
"Even if you really are a little crazy, it wouldn't make a difference. I want you the way you are and that's not going to change."
"You're not going to try to change me?" asked Kaiba. Their toes were touching. Jonouchi could make out the scent of Kaiba's shampoo in her hair, like he had used to back in class when he sat behind her. "You promise?"
"I promise," Jonouchi said with more confidence than he'd ever had while speaking to her before, "Nothing about you needs to change. As long as you'll accept me, I don't care."
Kaiba didn't speak, but from her expression she may not have known what to say. Jonouchi didn't have anything to add. He'd done a thorough job of baring his soul up until this point. They watched each other in wide-eyed silence for a few seconds at maddeningly close proximity until Jonouchi got sick of the tension.
He grasped her upper arms, pulling her closer to his chest than she already was. Kaiba was shocked, but he was banking on that. He cupped her face in his hands, and he only hesitated for what insignificant amount of time it took to be sure she wasn't going to pull away before bending his head and kissing her. He didn't waste time being awkward about it. If she decided to reject him, it wouldn't be because he hadn't been sincere.
She didn't pull away or hit him, or even try to bite. When she recovered from being startled, Kaiba reciprocated equally. Jonouchi moved his hands from her face so he could wrap them around her body instead, the softness of her sweater against his bare arms and the softness of her breasts against his lean torso.
When he pulled away, he looked at her. She had both hands on his shoulders and still looked slightly stunned but mostly amused. Maybe even humored. He hadn't seen her appear to look happy in what felt like a long time.
"Now wasn't that worth it?" Kaiba asked flirtatiously. He had his hands on the small of her back and she didn't even seem to mind that.
"Hell yes," Jonouchi replied without wasting a second. Then he grinned, and he knew he looked goofy, but he couldn't help it. "You shouldn't even have to ask."
He averted his eyes, closing them as he rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment. His whole body felt warm, especially his cheeks, but he also felt a tickling thrill run through him that he hadn't experienced in a long time.
"It's time you do that in real life then," Kaiba replied contently. She took a step back, grabbing Jonouchi's hands before looking towards the door of the library, smirking slightly before taking another step. "I know you can do it, Jonouchi. So prove it to Kaiba."
She dropped his hands after squeezing them, opening the door into the hallway and walking right out before closing them behind her.
Kaiba stood there watching as the paramedics took Jonouchi's body down, her hands feeling distinctively numb before Isono gave her an uneasy look.
The competition. They needed to continue the competition.
Yugi looked useless as ever, still crying over his best friend. Kaiba wasn't so detached that she didn't understand the emotion, but what was openly weeping going to solve? In his shoes, she would have already sworn and enacted revenge. Although, if Jonouchi died in that hospital bed, there wouldn't be much but the basest self-satisfaction to be gained through revenge. Even if Yugi was to end up facing and defeating Marik, he would never be able to change losing Jonouchi.
She was surprised he hadn't turned to her with the proud demeanor that came over him at times like this, and admonished her for refusing to stop the duel. She had expected him to tell her she was too ruthless and apathetic, there was nothing in her heart, etc.
Then again, it was Yugi. He wasn't doing that, and probably wouldn't. But that didn't stop the thoughts from crossing her mind as she struggled to simultaneously process and avoid the fact that Jonouchi was in critical condition, and she could have done something to stop it. By her own philosophy, the past was to stay in the past. It was out of her control.
However, Kaiba wasn't stupid enough to claim she was unfamiliar with regret, and it was upon her now in full force.
In a way, Yugi verbally assaulting her might have made her feel better. The conflict would have taken her mind from Jonouchi, and she would have the opportunity to trick herself into thinking she was right while she came to her own defense. Yugi was too busy crying to provide that confrontation; Mokuba took up the mantle in his place. Kaiba could already tell, by looking into his steely grey eyes, that there was an earful waiting for a private audience.
"Yugi," she addressed, her voice and manner deliberately unchanged from normal, "The next duel must start soon. If you don't continue, you'll forfeit the competition. Don't let the priority out of sight over this."
The word this she said with the barest hint of condescension in her tone. Yes, what a silly little boy, crippled by grief over the fact that one of his closest friends was inches from death. She would never jeopardize her own victory over something so petty. She was emotionally void, and therefore emotionally superior. She told herself this with such berating sarcasm that she feared her cruel front would crack.
Jonouchi had been impressive. She had to admit that. He'd landed himself in a hospital bed, but she knew anyone else would have been there too-much quicker. He'd proven himself deceptively cunning, and more capable than she had ever wanted to admit he could be. Not only that, but he had withstood an attack from Ra. He went down trying to seal his victory. His body gave out long before his spirit.
Kaiba was already working to erase the extremely vivid memory of Jonouchi's last conscious seconds, but she couldn't. She saw her own relentless determination in him for a few unlikely seconds, and something wouldn't allow her to let that go. Why? Because with that knowledge, she couldn't deny the fact that she was a hypocrite? Because she had devalued Jonouchi to the point of choosing a game over his life and well-being, and now had to remember his fierce commitment to victory?
She wanted it all out of her head. She had to keep moving forward. What would she gain from analyzing all of that? Nothing. Hell, it didn't even have to do with her. She should have washed her hands of Jonouchi well before he got close enough for her to know him as well as she did. She should never have let herself feel responsible for him. She should never have pulled him out of the goddamn ocean.
She should have stopped the duel.
Life went on, or so she informed herself, and life wasn't going to wait for anyone to finish crying. Including Yugi. She certainly wasn't going to stand there paralyzed by reality when she could be clearing the whole debacle from her mind by focusing in on the championship like her life hinged on it. It had been a good strategy for avoiding herself thus far.
"Your friend's dueling was admirable," she began, emphasis on your and a conservative choice of words, "I won't deny that he performed well. But the nature of the competition is to remove all but the absolute strongest."
That much was true. A quiet but infuriating part of her mind reminded her that it wasn't necessarily a measure of "strength" though when one competitor was cheating and using outside methods to secure his victories. Jonouchi should have won. He would have won, if it wasn't for the fact that Marik's duel somehow managed to suck the literal strength out of Jonouchi's mortal body.
It wasn't a fair fight. Mokuba was right to try and call it off.
"Your destiny rides on the next duel. You must continue, Yugi."
She nearly flinched when Yugi actually did move. Not only did he move, but he whipped around to face her in one swift motion, his expression transitioned into anger for the first time she'd seen in person. Her vision zeroed in on the shadows around his eyes as they squinted at her, the shape of his bared teeth, and the way his nose wrinkled in disgust.
"Kaiba, you would never understand what it feels like to lose someone close to you," accused Yugi.
Kaiba snorted. It didn't sound like Mutou Yugi's words, but the other Yugi.
And she most certainly knew what it felt like to lose someone. How dare he.
"Jonouchi isn't dead," she declared heatedly. "Don't talk about him like he is. Get your shit together and duel me already."
Yugi glared at her but managed to pick himself up, wiping the tears from his eyes.
"You're on, Kaiba."
She was going to win. Yugi was trapped. Three Blue-Eyes White Dragons on the field and Yugi had nothing powerful enough to protect himself with. This was it! This was the end! She'd be crowned victor and finally, after waiting for so long after her humiliating defeat, she'd be able to leave that part of her life behind her. She'd be vindicated.
Yugi looked panicked. His face was white and his eyes were buggy. Now he'd understand the feeling of standing on the side of defeat.
"I'm going to brand my name into your mind!" announced Kaiba, and she outstretched her hand before grinning, "Blue-Eyes White Dragons, attack!"
The dragons surrounded Yugi and their combined strength would ensure her victory, but then there was a kaleidoscope of light as Red-Eyes Black Dragon appeared on the field.
"What?!" Jonouchi's stupid dragon card? How?
"Flute of Summoning Dragon works for us both!" announced Yugi with a voice of determination. "Jonouchi has the spirit of a true duelist. He came to me in my time of need."
Ridiculous.
She'd destroy that card when the time came. It was powerful, but not as powerful as her three dragons. Nothing would beat the power of them, save the Gods.
And the Gods were dead.
Destroy it!
"Jonouchi's dragon doesn't change a thing," Kaiba spat. "I'll still destroy you. Just watch! Take out Yugi's miserable Dark Magician first!"
The first Blue-Eyes White Dragon let loose a streaming burst light, but then it repelled off and got sent back to Kaiba's Lord of Dragons, blasting him out of the field.
Magician Selection. What a cheap trap card.
"You won't escape these next two attacks Yugi!"
He cringed as Beta the Magnet Warrior was swiped off the field. Now only Red-Eyes was left!
Your victory is at hand! said Gozaburo's voice. Don't let it slip away now! Send them all to hell. Be the Kaiba I created you to be!
"Disappear, spirit of Jonouchi, and face your demise!"
Red-Eyes screeched before it counter attacked, going head to head with Blue-Eyes before blasting fire down its throat. Gasping, Kaiba could only watch as Yugi's Spellbinding Circle cut her dragon's attack points by 700, lowering her enough that Jonouchi's card could take out her dragon.
"It's not over," Kaiba seethed. "Not by a long shot."
Jonouchi's eyes opened. He could feel his head throbbing around the temples, the lights too sharp for his eyes. Blinking, he heard muffled voices before making out the sound of his sister gasping, someone clinging onto his chest before he finally came to.
"Nii-san, you're okay!"
She was clinging hard to him, but Jonouchi didn't mind. He put his arms around her and squeezed back, touching her hair with his rough fingers before he realized he was being watched. Anzu was tearing up and even Otogi appeared a little moved. Jonouchi straightened up immediately.
"What's going on? Did Yugi beat Marik?"
"Not yet," Honda reported. "He's still caught in a duel against Kaiba. I don't know if he's going to be able to beat her."
Dueling against Kaiba? Oh no. Yugi needed his support. If Kaiba won the duel, that meant she'd be going against Marik. Even with two possible God cards in her deck, Marik's Ra was the most formidable monster in the game. Would she be able to defeat it? Jonouchi didn't want to wait and see.
"I gotta go see him," Jonouchi complained, "Honda, help me up."
Jonouchi began tearing all the medical equipment off his body. When his monitors went off, the doctor rushed in, freaking out before Jonouchi flipped on a t-shirt and slipped past him.
He could barely run. Every inch of his body hurt, but he couldn't wait and see what would happen. He needed to be there. For Yugi, and for Kaiba. He hated the thought of watching her lose, but at the same time, she needed to lose.
The dueling stadium was transformed into a gladiator ring. It was massive, and Jonouchi felt almost overwhelmed by it all before charging forward. Not quite sure where to go, he lapped around several times before almost collapsing. Honda finally caught up with him, picking him up by the arm and hauling him towards the entrance, Jonouchi determined to reach there as quickly as possible.
He could see her now. Kaiba Seto, in all her warrior glory, with her most loyal and formidable monsters on the field. Three gleaming Blue-Eyes White Dragons. She looked nearly possessed, so focused on defeating Yugi and Jonouchi felt a chill run down her spine.
"Yugi, hang in there!" Jonouchi yelled. His chest hurt and his legs felt weak, like they'd give any moment, but Jonouchi wanted to make sure that Yugi knew he was there.
There was tension in the air. The end was near. Jonouchi could feel it. Yugi looked ready, his face grim and face dripping with sweat. He was making his move. Drawing what might be his final card.
"The card I hold will conquer the darkness that surrounds your heart! Diffusion Wave-Motion!"
Yugi had sacrificed 1000 life points to allow his Dark Paladin to attack all the monsters on the field. A blinding light flashed, and Jonouchi had to cover his eyes as he heard Mokuba scream across from him. When the dust cleared, he saw the aftermath.
All three of Kaiba's dragons, gone.
The duel was over.
"I told you your hatred and lust for power would never prevail," said Yugi directly. He was walking towards Kaiba now, approaching and looking up at her eyes. "Kaiba, you lose to me but you have to defeat your hatred."
Kaiba looked so angry. She tossed her Obelisk card at Yugi without a care, her eyes glancing towards Jonouchi for a moment before she turned back to glare at Yugi some more. Jonouchi didn't know how he'd deserved that. Looking to the other side, he saw Mokuba on his knees shaking, appearing in almost a worse state than his own sister.
"Honda, let me go, I'm fine," Jonouchi muttered. Honda let go, looking confused before Jonouchi hobbled his way over to Mokuba, reaching him and putting a hand on his shoulder.
"Mokuba," he said in a quiet voice, "It's going to be alright."
"You don't understand," snapped Mokuba. "You never could."
Withdrawing his hand, Jonouchi frowned. "I'd try to."
Then he heard raised voices. Yugi had told Kaiba that she'd put up the most challenging duel he'd ever faced, but she wasn't having it. She raised her hand and blew him off, stating that noise belonged to the victor before marching past him like a storming thunder cloud and exiting the arena.
Jonouchi frowned. He began to feel worried. For Kaiba, and for Mokuba.
But also Yugi. His next opponent would be Marik and everyone would be relying on him to see that duel through and save Mai, as well as Rishid.
"Great duel, Yugi," Jonouchi tried to smile. He gave Yugi a weak thumbs up before grabbing a wall for support. Thankfully, Yugi was coming to him. It saved him falling on his ass and getting hurt more. "Is Kaiba going to be okay?"
"I hope so," Yugi answered. "I told her we were equals. If she didn't fight with so much hatred, I am sure she would have won.
"And Jonouchi, you saved me."
"What?" Jonouchi squawked. He could feel his heart beating faster. "What are you talking about, Yug'?"
"Your Red-Eyes, Jonouchi, it saved my duel," Yugi said. "If it wasn't for you, I would have lost. I owe you a duel when we return to Japan. So you can win your soul card back."
Smiling, Jonouchi slapped his hand on Yugi's back.
"It's a deal," Jonouchi replied ecstatically, "As soon as we get back."
But first, he needed to go do something more important.
I am nothing.
She heard those words in her own voice. Gozaburo's had left, and she could feel a weight lift from her shoulders when she tossed Obelisk to Yugi, but at the same time, she wasn't ready to let it go. It was supposed to lead her to victory. Finally bring her back up to the top of the world where she was destined to belong.
She'd failed herself. The duel, the cards, her brother. Everything.
Mokuba had found her soon after. They'd exchanged words, in private. It was heated, and Kaiba had felt ashamed afterward. How could she have lost sight of herself so much? She was no longer the person she'd been before. Back before the orphanage, before Gozaburo's brainwashing, before she'd drive him to suicide and took over his corporation...
All Kaiba could feel was numbness. A numbness and an emptiness. No more of Gozaburo's words to guide her. To hurt her.
She sat on a rock and stewed.
Kaiba knew Mokuba was right. The kid was always right. It was possible that he might be smarter than she was, Kaiba was sure of it. Mokuba just didn't speak much unless prompted to and usually kept his blooming intelligence to himself. Mokuba certainly had more common sense than she did, and it tore her up more than she wanted to admit when he really started tearing into her.
She didn't like hearing about those sort of things being said about her, but it was all true. Sometimes Kaiba didn't know where she ended and where Gozaburo began. It was so easy to confuse her thoughts with his training... his seductive brainwashing, and the way he seemed to make sense...
Gozaburo had made too much sense. He was too rational, too callous, so completely emotionally removed from all the rest of humanity. If it wasn't for his vices, Kaiba would have thought he was nothing more than a sadistic computer program inside a meat suit. He certainly didn't act like a human being.
Kaiba knew she'd been raised by a psychopath. He'd nearly turned her into one, too.
No, he'd succeed at it. Her only saving grace was Yugi wiping clean her mind in that duel...
Kaiba was torn from her thoughts when she saw torn looking gym shoes right outside of her peripheral vision. Lifting her head up, her eyes met with Jonouchi's and she could feel her heart burning in her chest as she began to glare at him.
"What the hell do you want?" she asked. "Don't tell me you're here to challenge me to a rematch?"
"What would I get out of that?" Jonouchi challenged. "I'm here to talk to you, Kaiba. Why else would I come see you?"
Kaiba could name all sorts of reasons why Jonouchi might have approached her. Dueling just sounded like the least unpleasant of his possible motives for him having shown up, especially right after her defeat.
"Talk about what?" she stressed. "Look, I'm not in the mood to have some lengthy discussion about morality with you, Jonouchi. Besides, you should still be with the doctor in the blimp right now. You almost died."
"But I'm alive," Jonouchi stated, "And I'm not here to talk about whatever crap you just brought up."
"Then what do you want?" Kaiba got up and crossed her arms against her chest, not quite glaring at Jonouchi but certainly not looking at him all too friendly. "Trying to get a dig in because I lost to Yugi again? Go ahead, I'm sure you won't be able to help yourself since you were right."
"You know damn well I'm not here for that," Jonouchi snapped. He almost looked offended. "Don't try to blow me off. This isn't about your duel with Yugi or any part of the tournament. I came to talk to you because I still want to be your friend."
"-what?"
Jonouchi's words spun her for a loop. Why the hell would he still want that? It wasn't rational and it didn't make any sense. She'd watch him almost die earlier and did nothing to stop Marik; why on earth would he want someone like her to be his friend? Kaiba wasn't even sure if she knew how to act like one!
"You can't be serious," Kaiba mumbled.
"I am. Kaiba, you talk shit to me all the time." Jonouchi now crossed his arms, leaning on one foot before sighing loudly, his annoyance clear. "Why would doing it more make me change my mind?"
"I don't know," Kaiba replied testedly, "Why do you keep coming back? I'm not a good person, Jonouchi. You know I don't treat you well at all. If you had some good sense, you wouldn't bother."
"Being sensible has nothing to do with it," Jonouchi shrugged, "I know what I want. Yeah, you come out of nowhere treating me like crap, but I realized that's a sign I mean something to you, right?
"You need help, and I want to help you, whether you believe it or not. I care about you, Kaiba."
She felt her heart pounding unusually hard again. What the fuck was Jonouchi saying? Was he playing at something?
No, he was being sincere. He had always been sincere. The possibility of being tricked sounded easier to handle than the possibility that Jonouchi might actually want her around.
He was standing very close to her. Kaiba could make out the specks of gold in his eyes.
"I don't think you know what you're asking for," Kaiba derailed. "Your intentions are good, but they don't make any logical sense..." She paused before taking a step back. "Why do you want this so badly?'
"Because I like the good things about you, even though you work so hard to try and hide them," Jonouchi grinned, "I know exactly what I'm asking for, Kaiba. I've thought about it for a long time. I like you the way you are, and I want to be with you."
"You want to be with me?" Kaiba choked out. She felt her chest tighten at those words. "What the fuck does that even mean?"
"I mean I want a relationship with you," Jonouchi replied in painfully certain terms, "I want the chance to know you. I love you, Kaiba, and I'm sick of trying to hide it just because I don't want to get hurt. I already tried denying it and telling myself to get over it. My feelings aren't going to change, so I have to do something.
"I'd rather come clean and be rejected than keep playing this stupid game with you."
Jonouchi's admittance stunned her. She felt unable to speak at first, just staring at Jonouchi dumbly with her mouth slightly ajar before finally closing it. He wasn't breaking his gaze, and Kaiba couldn't stand looking him in the eyes, so she broke contact first, glaring out into the emptiness of the gigantic room before looking back up at Jonouchi and frowning.
"You're just making fun of me," Kaiba accused. She gave Jonouchi a hard shove in the chest before taking another step back, nearly bumping into the wall behind her. "You don't mean anything you say. You're making shit up to get back at me. This is probably just a game to you. A funny, amusing game. Next, your friend Honda is going to pop out from behind and you two will have your final laugh about me."
"Why is it easier for you to pretend I'm making fun of you than accept that I love you?" Jonouchi demanded. "If you thought I was an idiot, you'd know I couldn't plan something like that. And if you don't think I'm an idiot, you know I'd think through something like that before saying it. I've liked you long enough to be sure, and you've known I've liked you for years, Kaiba. You can't decide it's a joke just because now it's out in the open."
"-Then prove it's not a joke," Kaiba declared in a defiant tone. Her voice was slightly cracking. She needed to leave this place. Go shut herself somewhere, alone. Away from all the people in her unfortunate life. "Because right now, I don't believe you."
Jonouchi didn't get angry, but he looked annoyed and at least a little offended.
"What do you want as proof? I already just poured my heart out to you, knowing you could use it to destroy me," he said, "But fine. How about when I visited you in the hospital, and then snuck onto your property when I realized you were missing? Or when I tried to save Mokuba from Pegasus's professional kidnapper in Duelist Kingdom? I went to find you after Pegasus lost, and I was the first one to volunteer to dive into that virtual world nightmare after you.
"And when you couldn't save Mokuba from the dragon, I did it in your place knowing it might be the last thing I did."
He paused for only a second, possibly for emphasis. His brow was furrowed, his expression more serious than it had ever been outside of a duel.
"I dueled Marik because I didn't want you to get hurt," he concluded, "Despite your best attempts to stop me for your own satisfaction. And I haven't regretted it for a second."
"You're stupid," Kaiba declared in a low, nearly inaudible voice. "Really, really stupid..."
She could feel her body becoming tense as she felt progressively more uncomfortable looking Jonouchi directly in the eyes.
Kaiba knew he was telling the truth. Half of the things Jonouchi said, she didn't know about, but the other half, she'd always been aware of. She'd seen Mokuba with Jonouchi at Duelist Kingdom, when she'd came to get him back. Jonouchi had been the one to free her from chains in the Big Five's virtual reality game, and he'd taken an attack for Mokuba when the duel against them went south.
He also had tricked her to get that duel against Marik. She felt terribly guilty about it, too, because she'd been so furious at him for pulling that stunt.
"I'm stupid because I have feelings for you?" Jonouchi scoffed. He paused and leaned toward her, as if gauging her reaction. Then he took a couple of steps with little hesitation. "If you want to believe that, fine. It's not going to change anything."
The proximity had become close very quickly. Jonouchi was standing a meter away from her, at maximum, and only stopped there for a second. He took a deep breath, holding her gaze determinedly.
"Kaiba," he addressed, his voice low and soft for once as he closed the distance between them. His hands cupped her face unexpectedly. "Believe me when I say I love you."
Suddenly, he reached forward, looking her in the eyes. Kaiba wanted to take a step back, or shove him away (she could do much worse, even), but her feet felt too heavy and she was unable to move. She didn't really know what to do or even what to say.
Should she just let this thing play out? Half of her was curious, and the other, more rational half hated the fact that she was curious.
And then Jonouchi's lips were against hers, and she realized that he was kissing her. It was confident, but soft at first. When she didn't pull away, though, he pressed into her, the hand he held her with pulling her closer. Kaiba remained tense with shock, but somehow the touch lulled her to the point that her eyes fell slowly shut. As her muscles relaxed, just slightly, she felt herself leaning into his touch. The more the surprise wore off, the more she felt herself responding to him, until she was reciprocating with nearly equal force, both her hands on his shoulders before she realized what she was doing.
It felt like a long time passed, but it could only have been a scarce few seconds. Jonouchi pulled away with unpleasant abruptness, and Kaiba's eyes snapped open as air rushed in her lungs. Suddenly, Jonouchi backed away, staring at her with a flushed face. His eyes were wide and anxious.
"I-" he started in a stammer, "Uh... I'm so sorry, I..."
He tripped over himself, turning heel before they could really make eye contact, and ran away with extreme urgency.
She felt stunned. At herself and at Jonouchi. Honestly, Kaiba wasn't sure who more at, since she could still feel tingling on her lips from where Jonouchi's mouth had just been. It hadn't been terrible, which shouldn't have been shocking to her, but Kaiba didn't count on it being good, either. Hell, she never counted anything to be good regarding Jonouchi in any kind of sexual manner, but-
Well, that wasn't exactly true.
Not after that silly dream.