Hopefully you'll enjoy!
A little wolf was being chased. Through the endless darkness, through the shredding shrubs and through the howling wind it ran.
All kinds of beasts were after the pup. Spiders, elks, bats and bears.
Around the pup trees started collapsing, crashing down as the earth shook. Then the ground gave away, the cub falling into a bit.
The monsters gathered around the hole, snarling and screaming at the crying pup who couldn't find a way out nor hide.
Then the sky ruptured, dancing lights appearing and clearing the darkness. Moons and stars came out.
And there was different howling in the air, of living creatures, powerful and getting nearer.
Wolves. There were red, white, brown and dark ones.
They chased the monsters away, drowned the scary hissing and screaming with their growling and howling.
They helped the little pup out of the bit, comforted her, promising the monsters would never again get to her.
The pup cried, relieved, feeling the terror leaving and being replaced by warmer feelings. Safety. Trust.
She looked at the familiar beasts, ready to return to home dent with them.
Gyvas stirred. She was sniffling, confused and tears in her eyes. Someone pulled her into a hug. Aela reassured the upset girl.
"It's okay pup, it was just a nightmare."
"Where- Where are we?" the child asked, unable to see through tears.
"...Home. Now calm down and go back to sleep, I'll be with you, okay?"
Sniffing the girl nodded, taking a shaky breath and despite the scariness of the dream, she felt already better. Shaken, but lighter. Somehow familiar and most importantly, safe.
Rubbing her eyes and settling back down, Aela sitting next to her, the still exhausted child fell back to sleep. The grip of her fingers relaxed on Aela's hand.
The Huntress and the Dunmer let out silent breaths, glad that the situation had easily dissolved.
They were inside of the mansion. Vilkas with Serana had gone down to the basement, and the child placed onto a bed before she suddenly started whimpering and twisting in her sleep.
The two Companions weren't sure was it because of the happenings with the vampires, the uninhabited home of hers or because Vilkas wasn't near now.
But they rethought and knew that suddenly waking up in her original home most likely would be bad for the child's mind.
"As soon as Vilkas comes back, we are continuing to Whiterun", Aela whispered.
"Agreed", Athis nodded.
At the basement Vilkas stood in front of a mannequin.
Serana had vanished into a hidden tunnel to get the Aurelia's bow.
The Nord man had first been intrigued to see the trophy room that laid at the tunnel's end, to see what all kind of artifacts were hidden there.
But as he had followed the vampire into the basement, he had immediately noticed armor set that the mannequin wore.
It was adorned with the elements of wolf, created at the Skyforge's hearth by Eorlund Gray-Mane. This kind of armor was worn only by members of the Circle.
The Wolf Armor.
Vilkas also instantly knew this one had belonged to Drust.
Vilkas had been there when Eorlund had gifted it to her. She had wore it when they, she, Vilkas, Aela and Farkas, had entered Ysgramor's Tomb to put Kodlak's spirit free from the beast blood's curse.
And it had been Drust and Aela who had freed the man's soul.
Because Vilkas hadn't followed them further than the first room. He had been too ashamed of his unpure revenge, killing the Silver Hand members in anger, after Kodlak was murdered.
Vilkas now looked at the snarling wolf face on the armor, and he felt so, so, ashamed. Even more than he had been then. The guilt hitting like a wave, pulling him under.
They could still be alive, a voice snarled in his mind. Vicious. Dominating.
Their love was strong and pure, the voice kept going, increasing the heaviness in his heart.
They would have never been ambushed if they had been with the Companions, it slowly ripped Vilkas apart. Stabbed and reopened the wounds that barely had scarred.
Jorrvaskr was their home too.
They tried mending the tides with you again and again.
And you bit their hands like a feral animal.
You chased them away, you killed them, you made Gyvas an orphan!
Yet you are alive, the Harbinger, living in Jorrvaskr and raising their child!
HAVE YOU NO SHAME FOR KILLING YOUR BROTHER AND YOUR LOVER!?
"Vilkas?"
The warrior jumped, shaken, sweating and now staring at Serana. She looked at him curiously, holding the bow wrapped in white cloth.
"What's wrong", she asked, glancing at the armor and then at him.
Voice wavering he answered, avoiding her gaze: "Ma- Maybe, the child is better with you and the Dawnguard."
The vampire was surprised, blinked and then frowned.
"I said she was better with you and the Companions? Remember?"
The man nodded, continuing, trying to keep standing under the crashing guilt.
"Yes. But I rethought and... Maybe it's a mistake, for her to stay in Jorrvaskr."
"And why is that?" The vampire questioned critically, leaning to one foot and a hand on her hip.
It took a moment for Vilkas to answer, to try voicing the tormenting thoughts he wrestled with ever since he had heard of their deaths.
"They maybe wouldn't be dead, if I wouldn't have been so-"
He failed to find the right word, as there were many harsh ones to describe his behavior towards them back then.
Vilkas' voice broke and hanging his head he swallowed, closing his eyes.
Closing his hands into fists as he tried to keep himself from breaking in front of Serana. Who didn't say anything for a long moment.
And yet, despite of the guilt and what he was saying, Vilkas didn't want to let Gyvas go. It pained to say she should leave.
Gyvas was... Well, Vilkas hadn't spent much time with the girl, true, but he liked her. She was part of Farkas and Drust after all, she is the only thing that remained of his brother.
She was now Vilkas' only family by blood.
And he wanted to see what she would become. What path she would choose and what she would accomplish. Watch over her and teach her.
Yet shouldn't these desires be her parents' privileges? Wouldn't he, who drove them away and partly caused their deaths, be also a thief on top of everything else?
Finally Serana broke the silence by asking, with gentle voice that was free from the usual sarcasm and boredom she seemed to naturally include to it.
"I don't want to overshare, but I would like to tell you about my family. So, would you look at me?"
Vilkas opened his eyes, slowly lifting his face. Fearing what he would see in the woman's gaze but there was nothing in them that he was waiting for.
No hate nor judgment. Just a peek of frailty. And sympathy. It was surprising.
Serana sighed, gaze wandering.
"My father, was not the best. He was... Difficult, way before we were turned into vampires. Then he wanted to destroy the world to have some false godhood. And so he put my disputing mother into this dark dimension and me to sleep underground for long, long centuries."
The last part Serana breathed, shuddering as the memory still haunted her. Gripping onto the wrapped bow she looked at it.
"Father did bad things to everyone, because he felt it was his right. And all the way to his end, he never, ever, regretted any of it. He never showed shame or guilt. He always lied how he did it all for me, for our family or for our people. There was always an excuse he would casually threw. So..."
She looked at Vilkas.
"Whatever that voice says to you, no matter how convincing, it is wrong. Yes, you made mistakes. Bad ones. You will make more. But as long as you do those mistakes because you care and love for those important to you, as long as you can feel guilt and shame, you are not a monster. You are just a human."
Serana shook her head lightly and smiled knowingly.
"So no. Gyvas should stay with you and the others, that's pretty obvious. I'm pretty sure she would be as sad as you if you sent her away. You are not a bad person for wanting to raise her, Vilkas. You are her uncle after all. And you are not wrong either for being unsure about it. Just remember you have a whole pack to help you."
The woman put a reassuring hand onto the man's shoulder.
"And me and Dawnguard will back you up too."
Vilkas didn't say anything. He felt his voice would be too raw and unsteady. Instead swallowing and trying to hold onto stoic face he nodded.
Blinking and trying to keep tears away.
He still doubted himself, of his capability and motives to raise his brother's daughter. Afraid he will do something wrong that will make the girl look at him with that terror she had shown when learning the truth, running away from him.
He never wanted Gyvas look at him like that ever again.
He wanted her to be happy.
Vilkas swore an oath to himself. That where ever Gyvas wanted to stay, with him or the Dawnguard or somewhere else... He will look after the child, protect her, guide her, help her becoming what ever she would want to be. She is child of the woman he loved and the daughter of his twin brother.
And if Gyvas truly wanted to stay with him... Then Vilkas was ready to wrestle with his demons as many times as needed to be a parent the girl needs.
He owned her that much after all.
As all of them exited the manor, Aela was carrying the girl again. Gyvas had been wrapped into a thin blanket, the Huntress saying it would keep the girl comfortable and stop sun from shining onto her eyes while she kept sleeping.
The girl would immediately be seen by the healers and the court's wizard when they would arrive. Vilkas wanted the girl be thoroughly checked in case the bloodsuckers had left any kind of taint on her.
But he also hesitated at something, while watching the redheaded warrior cuddling the pup like Gyvas was her own daughter.
"Aela", he called and the Huntress turned towards him with a question.
The Nord man hesitated even more, looked at the sleeping girl and then said quietly as if not to disturb her sleep.
"Maybe I should carry her, for a bit?"
Aela squinted, holding back a smile.
"No need, I can still carry her. All the way if needed."
Vilkas' mouth tightened as he tried to think some excuse. But he finally faintly growled: "I want to carry my niece, Aela."
The Huntress let herself grin now, happy for the oaf.
"I guess it would be better", she snickered and handed the child over. Guiding without words how he should carry.
Gyvas whimpered, opening her eyes a bit.
Everyone tensed, as they still were right outside the house.
"Uncle?" she mumbled, leaning against Vilkas who answered: "Yeah?"
"Are we home yet?"
"Soon pup, just keep sleeping."
The girl nodded, muttering before her voice died down: "I wanna thank Dawnguard, uncle. I want to see Serana too."
The vampire smiled under her hood, whispering she would visit Whiterun in the near future.
The Companions said farewells, thanking for Serana's help and then left her to raise the protection spells back over the house.
Carrying the child Vilkas tried to hold as Aela had shown, but he was worried he was holding too tight or too loosely. Gyvas wasn't a baby but she was very thin and small so he still worried. Guess that would be a feeling he would never get rid off now.
He also recalled a guard telling about Gyvas jumping down into the water pools and stealing a hen and running around the city with other kids. Normal child things but still, she could get hurt if acting like a wild thing.
Though he and Farkas hadn't been any better. Maybe worse even. Stealing sweetrolls and climbing on the city walls and jumping from roofs.
Vilkas really hoped Gyvas wouldn't get any ideas like that. Or like climbing onto the Dragonsreach's roof! And he still needed to order someone to built a rail around the mead hall's fireplace. And he remembered Gyvas wanting to learn to handle two-handed swords. He should make a schedule for that, as it was obvious it should be he, the master of two-handed, to teach the pup.
But the lessons would need to wait though. First Gyvas needed to rest after all of this, as long as healers tell. And maybe more then.
And no leaving the city without an adult, ever again. It had been a mistake at the first place to let Gyvas go with just another child.
Thinking all of these things, security, teaching and taking care, Vilkas felt new kind of determination. Strong one, which center was his niece.
Gyvas would maybe need him. So Vilkas would start breaking down the wall he had built in the first place between them, more because of his fears than to actually protect her.
To act as her guardian and as her parent, Vilkas would have little room for wallowing in self-pity and insecurity. It was time for him to take real responsibility of her, instead of hiding and running away.
The Nord man raised his hand from the girls shoulder onto the back of her head, petting through the thin blanket. The child nuzzled against him, making little noise.
It made Vilkas feel parental protectiveness and love towards the girl, strong kind of, that for the first time didn't waver like a little flame in a wind.