She was locked up. Locked up ! And Souji was responsible for it ! She hated it. Of course, she supposed no one liked to be kept prisoner but for her, it was driving her insane, making her feel vulnerable, back to Yoshio's whorehouse where there was no escape. At first, she banged her fists on the wall but it was ineffective and she only made her knuckles bleed. Hurt, pained, panicked and scared, she crawled in a corner and cried, her face burried in her knees.
Souji... Why ? Why are you doing this ?
She didn't have her wakizashi, one of her kaiken stayed in the teahouse in Oita and the second one fell on the ground at the workshop. She had nothing, she was helpless, just like when she was nothing more than a little girl, crying every night and wishing for death. She thought that fear was behind her but these kind of wounds never truly heal.
How long had she been in there ? Hours probably... There was a window and she could see that the sun was slowly settling down. Would Souji only come back in the morning ? There wasn't even a futon here... Was she supposed to sleep on the tatami ?
Why would he have to do this ? It just didn't make any sense. If he wanted her to stay with him that much, she would be happy to oblige him. He just needed not to marry Tama. It wasn't that hard to understand. What could he be thinking in his sick little head ? That he could keep her here forever ? Tama probably would be thrilled by the idea, her husband keeping another woman captive under their roof.
She heard the sound of the lock and rose her eyes. Souji entered with a kind smile and a tray.
« I cooked. » he said as if the situation was perfectly normal « I hope you'll like it. It's not as good as yours. »
« Souji... » she cried « why are you doing this ? »
« Cooking ? » he asked, oblivious « I wasn't gonna ask you to do it. »
« Souji, please let me out... » she begged.
« I can't... » he stated, avoiding her gaze « You'd run away. »
« You can't keep me in here ! »
« You promised Haru-chan... » he said with a kind smile, catching a tear with his finger « to never leave my side. »
« So you're just gonna keep me locked up ? »
« Do you love me, Haru-chan ? » he asked bluntly.
« I do... » she whispered « I love you Souji but my love will diminish with every hour locked in this room. This isn't sane... »
Souji seemed disgruntled by the information and he pouted, arms crossed like a child. Haruhi felt like he could be open to discussion and she took the opportunity.
« Souji, you have to let me out. » she said « It's not right. »
« I thought you were gone. » he said « I thought you were back to Hajime and I didn't know where that could be. The Fukushima prefecture is vast. I can't feel that anguish again. I need to know you're near. »
« That's... »
Toxic ? Insane ? Selfish ? As much as I want to say these words, not sure using negative adjectives could sooth him.
« Souji, you also made me a promise. » she said.
« Which one ? » he asked, searching within himself for the promise he might be breaking.
« You promised you'd never hurt me. » she said, looking at him.
« I'm not hurting you. » he protested.
« You are. » she nodded « by keeping me in this room. Let me go back to the workshop, please Souji... I can't stand being locked up like this, alone... »
« If you're afraid, I'll stay with you. » he smiled genuinely « You mustn't fear, neither cry because I'll keep you safe and protect you. »
« Can you protect me from yourself ? » she sighed.
« I love you, Haruhi. » he said « I love you so much that I felt completely... lost... powerless... when you walked out on me. I can't bear to be away from you. I guess you needed to go for me to realize that I needed you that much. Now that I know, I intend to keep you close. »
« You want me to stay as an empty shell ? » she asked « because that's what you gonna get. »
« I'll let you out. » he smiled « if you take the job. I don't want you to be some kind of prisoner. I know you enjoyed being an instructor, at your hometown, at the Shieikan... You can be one again and do something you love. »
Haruhi didn't answer. There was no point. Souji's mind was twisted in this instant, grief making him distort everything in his mind. As long as he wouldn't come back to his senses, he wouldn't listen to anything she could say.
« The old man is here by the way » said Souji « he wants to see you. Should I let him in ? »
Haruhi startled. She was allowed to have visitors ? She couldn't fathom a single thing... What was inside Souji's head ? She wanted to open it up to understand...
« Yeah ! » she nodded « I want to see him ! »
« Okay » smiled Souji « I'll tell him. »
Souji got up and exited the room, closing it. He eventually returned with Kurozawa-sensei and the old man turned to him with a frown.
« Can I see her alone ? »
« She decides. » he smiled genuinely.
« Yes, please Souji. » she said, not believing how lucky she was in her misery.
« Okay. »
He stepped out and left the both of them alone. Kurozawa-sensei kneeled next to Haruhi, worry painted on his face.
« Are you hurt, Fujita ? Do you need me to come back with policemen ? »
« No. » she shook her head « Souji's in the darkest places of his mind right now. It could be a bloodbath. »
« I'll warn them, they will be numerous. » he said.
« It wouldn't change a thing. » she stated with a small smile « Only the number of corpses. »
« Can't anyone do something, then ?! » he grumbled « Okita-san has no right to keep you here against your will. »
« There is someone who can. » she raised her head « do you have something to write ? »
« Do I really look like I came here with ink and paper ? » he grumbled again « but I brought you this. »
Her kaiken ! Good, she might need it and Souji was thinking her unarmed. She thanked the old man and looked around her. There was a woodblock print on the wall and she took it down and used the kaiken to carve in it.
« If in a week, I'm still not out » she said softly, all to her task « send a letter to this adress. To Fujita Hajime. He'll be able to calm Souji. »
« By the time the letter reaches him and he gets here, you will be kept here for months ! » he protested.
« I know, but it's the only way to avoid bloodshed. Give me a week and I'll get out. If I fail, warn my father. »
« Will he really make a difference if you tell me that Okita-san could kill numerous policemen ? »
« He will. » she smiled « Does the name Saito rings any bells to you ? »
« I'm sorry it doesn't. » he shook his head.
« Nevermind » she sighed « Souji will listen to him and if he doesn't, my father isn't an easy man to kill. »
« I will do as you say, Fujita » he nodded, hiding the woodblock print in his kimono « but if I hear you got hurt, I'm sending officers to the Shieikan and I will give Okita-san's true name to them. »
« Thank you, Ojiisan. » she said « I will make Souji come back to his senses so that you won't need to bother my father. »
She hid her kaiken in her obi, keeping it close in case she needed to use it and the old man stood up. The door wasn't locked and he got out without any signs of Souji. Haruhi thought for a minute about using that opportunity to flee but she stayed still in her room. Souji would have caught her easily. She needed for him to agree to give her back her freedom otherwise, her detention conditions might get worse after a failed escaped attempt and she wasn't really ready to be tied up. Already, seeing Kurozawa-sensei gave her hope. He was worried for her and would try to help her, warn her father. No way she and Souji could be a thing again if Hajime were to learn about this though, that's why she needed to try by herself at first. Souji loved her. He let the darkness possess him and his vision was clouded for now, but she could get him out and pull the old Souji to the surface of his soul. Maybe she could even find a way to stop that marriage...
Haruhi grabbed her chopsticks and started to eat to gain some forces. Souji's cooking wasn't that bad, maybe a bit too spicy but it was alright with the ice tea calming the fire in her mouth. Resolved, the gears in her head started working. She needed a plan. And she would find one. A plan that would save both of them.