Chapter Thirty-Three: Fish Aren't the Answer
Bella (POV)
One Week Ago
The forest felt cold and stark, and not very welcoming as we ran through it. I was consumed with nervous fear, not excitement like the last time I had hunted. I wasn't sure I could handle watching my father drink blood for the first time, and the very idea that he was like me weighed on my mind. I wasn't sure if I felt this change was wonderful or terrifying.
I had accepted Carlisle and Esme as my adoptive parents happily. They were amazing people. Yet now I had my human father, forever. I would never have to watch him grow old and infirm, and soon when we started a new life in a new place he would have to pose as my older brother instead of my father. We looked too much alike to not be family, but he barely looked more than a few years older than me. It would time to learn to accept one another as we were now, and forge a new version of our relationship. The roles of child and adult had never felt right between me and Charlie, even less so with my mother. But real change, I had no idea how to even begin that process.
Charlie's face was growing hard as we moved through the wilderness, and his anger seemed to grow as he easily avoided trees and obstacles with almost no visible effort, until he stopped abruptly with a loud grunt of displeasure.
"I can't do this Bells. This is nuts." He said with a small sneer.
"Let's get you fed; it'll be easier to think after that." I tried to explain.
"I'm not having trouble thinking. Wait, do you mean, blood?" He asked incredulously.
"Yes, it's what we are now. You will never age, never change. I hope you liked your hair cut." I tried to sound playful, but it came out harsh and slightly mean.
"What, no. What do you mean do I like my haircut? Bella… what the hell is going on?" He looked around and spread out his arms, it wasn't curiosity, it was anger. I had seen that expression before, mostly directed at Tyler and Edward.
"Sit." I demanded, motioning towards a downed log nearby. He frowned but complied.
"It will take too long to tell you everything, but that will come in time. God, should I start with vampire rules and history, or what happened to me?" I shrugged, it felt strange that I was the one teaching my father about the world.
"Start with what happened to you." Charlie said easily, lifting his chin and ending on a nod to accentuate his point.
"That day, when Tyler crashed his van, Edward had to make a very difficult choice. He held back and didn't intervene." I paused and Charlie's eyes went wide. I held up a finger and shook my head. "I was a virtual stranger and saving me would've risked exposure for him and his family. It was the mature thing to do, despite his burgeoning feelings for me. It was a choice that I have struggled with, and have chosen to finally accept and forgive." I tried to emphasize what mattered to me, but he was fuming.
"You're telling me that boy let you get hurt, and I'm supposed to just forget about it? Not gonna happen." Charlie's nostrils flared as he spoke.
"That is exactly what you're going to do, because I love him. I had just let him back into my life when this happened to you, and I cannot let you interfere with our relationship." We had never had an adversarial relationship. Charlie was usually very easy to get along with, his only real sticking point was when it came to my safety. Yet for some reason we were at odds, and I was finding that trying to explain any of my complicated life to him was proving to be impossible. He was proving to be stubborn and closed-minded, and everything led to a circular argument. It pained me to think we would never grow past this point, and we would continue to argue for eternity. The thought almost made me shudder.
"Perfect. Look Bella, I don't think he is right for you. I never did. The fact that he hurt you like that, I don't understand how you can forgive him." He was shaking his head as he spoke, clearly not hearing that his opinion didn't matter anymore on this particular issue.
"It should be enough that I have forgiven him. It was my pain, and my body that was harmed. Now, if you need to force your opinion on this, here are the facts. He literally made a split-second decision to protect his family. A choice that he has regretted every second of every day since. He knows I have accepted and forgiven his actions, and have manged to move past it." He was still shaking his head.
"You know what hurts me in all this? The fact that I now I am the love of his life. Can you imagine what he's going through? I had been focusing on my pain, and betrayal. Yet he is the one who suffers." It was as good a set up as I could manage, and pause to see if he would take the bait.
"I don't get it. How would he be suffering?" He asked, playing into what I wanted to say.
"One of the best and worst parts of our new existence is the fact we remember everything in perfect detail. I have the luxury of remembering very little from the crash, or my surgeries. Sure I had endless recovery and physical therapy and pain. But he had to watch as that van crushed me. He will have to live with that mental image for as long as he lives. Can you imagine watching that kind of tragedy, knowing you could've done something. To replay that horror again and again, wondering what could've happened if you had intervened. That's hell, it's basically an eternity of torture for one mistake. I would never want to inflict that on anyone, let alone someone I love."
"Point, but you suffered too. I had to watch you suffer for months." He said rejecting the explanation I had found to get past the feelings of betrayal.
"Yes, I did. Now all of that is gone because of him. What he did to himself is indelible. You know, he never tried to justify his actions, even though from a certain point of view his choice was noble. He protected his family, against his own personal desires." I hadn't verbalized my own explanation before, and I felt it was compelling. It was nice to have confirmation I truly felt good about forgiving Edward.
"That feels like a justification." I could tell I was getting through to him, but he had to get in one last objection.
"God dad, I have made my choice. I who he is, and all I can do now is love him. Let myself feel for him what I felt before I found out. It took me awhile to figure out how to trust him, but I do, with my life." I spoke clearly, slowly and patiently. Eventually Charlie nodded.
"Fine, I will try to get past this." He sighed. "I imagine there is more, I mean who the hell attacked me?" He pivoted quickly, taking a bit by surprise.
"Her name is Victoria. We're trying to track her down so we can stop her from setting loose an army against us." I said perhaps a bit to bluntly, and without proper context.
"Hold on, a what?" He looked both confused and a bit terrified.
"It's complicated. Basically, we went to play baseball, which dad you are going to love, and a couple of nomadic vampires heard us and came to see if they could join in. It would've been fine, but with Angela there…" I started, but he held up a hand.
"Wait, Angela? She's a part of all this?" He sounded a little angry again, but mostly still confused.
"Yeah, Carlisle told her about us while I was in transition so that she could help me hold onto my humanity." It sounded cleaner and easier than what actually happened, but at least it sounded simple.
"So, she's still human?" He said trying to keep on top of the facts.
"For now, although that's even more complicated." I said, not sure how deep into our current situation I should get.
"I hate your life Bella. How can you expect me to just accept all this?" He was shaking his head again, I could see a conflict in his eyes, the same conflict he had whenever he would drop me off at school in his converted van. The look he had whenever he had to help me out of my wheelchair to bathe, or when he had to take me up those steps every night. It was the kind of look that broke my heart.
"Dad. You have to accept this life because you don't have another choice. It isn't reversible." I tried to find just the right thing to calm him down, but I was running out of ideas. "Can't you just be happy that I'm back in your life again? You'll never have to worry about me getting sick or hurt outside of conflict we have no control over. I don't know who we are to each other, as adults, but we have a lot of time ahead of us to figure it out." I hated pulling the dead daughter card to get him to listen, but it seemed to work.
"I'm sorry, I am so unbelievably happy that you are alive and… walking. I just can't get my head around all of this. I should go home." He frowned, and I winced.
"You can't go home." I shook my head almost involuntarily; it was a subject I really hadn't wanted to get into yet.
"Why not?" He said aggressively, standing up as he said it.
"Everything thinks you're dead." I said after a long pause to gather my composure. "Our natural instinct is to feed, to kill. We're are the only natural predators of humanity. Instinctively we feel an almost irresistible pull to drink their blood. Right now, in these first few months you are going to be volatile, emotional, and dangerous to humans. It is also the time when you can make a choice, if possible, to follow our path. The Cullens and I have committed to never hunting humans, never drinking their blood. Yet even with that moral stricture, accidents happen."
"So, you're telling me I will want to kill people?" He took a step back and fell back on the log.
"Yes." I admitted, not able to look up to meet his eyes. He sat for several seconds without speaking. When he did it was barely a whisper.
"Then kill me Bella, I can't let myself become a monster." He had his eyes tightly shut, and his face buried in his hands.
"You don't have to be a killer. Carlisle is over three hundred years old and he has never feed off a human. He has honed his tolerance to the point he can be inches from someone on an operating table and shrug off the pull as if it were nothing. It can be done." I hoped that example would be enough.
"Have you?" He looked up, realizing that I was under the same pull as he was.
"No, but I'm weird." I shrugged, my gift made it too easy and I couldn't fully understand the struggle my father was going through.
"Weird?" He scrunched up his face a little, and shook his head, clearly not having a clue what I meant.
"I have something called a gift, think of it kind of like a superpower. I basically have a mental shield, which blocks any mental gift another vampire tries to assault me with. It also protects my mind from my own impulses. I can feel those monstrous instincts constantly butt up against my shield, but they never affect me. It gives me almost perfect control, well sort of, my emotions are still all over the place." I was proud of my explanation, and he nodded a couple of times in understanding.
"Are powers common?" I almost jumped for joy at the question since it was a positive direction in the conversation.
"From what I understand it is somewhat uncommon, for gifts to occur naturally. However, we're pretty sure you have some kind of power like mine, but we don't know what you can do." I wasn't sure it was right to dump that kind of information on him so soon, but he just nodded in stride.
"How would you know?" He asked the most obvious first question.
"Edward couldn't fully read your thoughts without a lot of concentration." I said without realizing I had just dumped an unpleasant truth on him.
"Edward is telepathic?" His eyes were practically bulging out of his head.
"Um… yeah. Alice can see the future and Rosalie can make you do things against your will." I added, hoping to spread out the damage to the rest of the family… which I quickly realized was stupid on several levels. Thankfully he simply shrugged, although he narrowed his eyes slightly.
"The snippy blonde can force you to do things, lovely." He shook his head a little with a sardonic smile.
"She's vowed never to use her ability in a petty or selfish way. Only to support our family." I tried to explain.
"Okay, I don't know about any of this, but I'll try Bella." He sighed, but got up and brushed the dirt from his jeans. "Who changed my clothes?"
"Alice picked them out as usual, but Carlisle put them on. I would have done it, but it felt weird. Anyway, all that I ask is that you try. Now let's get back to the hunt." I gave him an encouraging smile and reached out a hand to him, which he took. Then I motioned for him to start, and I let him lead, and eventually we came to a river and his eyes went wide and a big smile crossed his face. It was the first expression of joy I had seen since he woke up and saw me for the first time.
"Dad, fish are not very tasty." I furrowed my brow; I wasn't sure what was about to happen. Maybe his palate was different. He waded out into the river with a strange smile and looked back at me with a goofy grin.
"It isn't even cold, and the current is like nothing to walk through." He looked positively joyful. I nodded with a somewhat supportive smile on my face, but I was cringing inwardly.
He stood perfectly still, and then he suddenly erupted in motion and reached into the water like he was a master of barehanded fishing. He immediately brought the fish up and out of the water and didn't waste any time biting into it. Two seconds later his eyes shot open and a strange look crossed his face as he tossed the fish onto the riverbank.
"I told you it wasn't a good idea; fish just don't work for our needs." Charlie was still spitting out the fish blood like he had just been forced to eat a rotten egg or sewage.
"Well that's strike one. How am I supposed to live like this Bells?" He looked at the mangled corpse of the fish he had been attempting to drink from with a look of hopelessness.
"You just do, personally I like mountain lion like Edward. But everyone has their own tastes, Emmett loves bear, and Rose is really into hunting wolves." He looked at me incredulously.
"So, you're saying I need to hunt bears?" I shrugged at him.
"You can technically hunt anything with blood, I only knew about fish because I tried it once when I first turned. Edward tried to warn me off, but I didn't listen. I practically vomited, which would've been a trick considering I'm not entirely sure I use my stomach to digest the blood." I made a mental note to ask Carlisle about that one sometime later.
"Okay, I guess we move on to deer." He was an experienced hunter, and it was fascinating to watch him track and hunt using a combination of his new senses and skills he had learned over time. The first deer was a good kill, he was quick and efficient and didn't let it suffer. Except that he hated that taste. So, he moved onto small game. Fifteen rabbits and squirrels later, he was full but not happy. In hindsight I wished I had followed Edward's example of leading me on the hunt, instead of letting Charlie figure it out for himself.
"You get used to the taste." I offered after he gave up. I was curious about his experience and wondered how he was acting so much like he was still human.
"Do you feel anything when you hunt?" I asked, wondering if he was having a similar experience to mine.
"There's this burning in my throat that I keep fighting with. It's like a need, and their blood helps. This wave of, I could only really describe it as addiction keeps trying to overwhelm me. So, I keep having to shove it down. No, it isn't a push. It is almost like a light switch. I feel it, and I can just turn it off." His attempt to explain made almost too much sense to me.
"That's interesting. I wish Mason were here, he could tell us what you can do." I wanted to know what he could do, and maybe if he had a shield like mine.
"Who's Mason?" I blinked, of course he wouldn't know about him and he was so complicated to explain.
"Oh… um… he's a new friend. He's kind of um… he's kind of old." I stumbled over an explanation, not sure how to even start.
"Spit it out." He rolled his eyes and gave me a half smile half frown.
"Well, he's the first vampire, and I'm pretty sure he's in love with Angela." I said with a wince. Charlie blinked at me a few times, and then he started to chuckle, then the chuckle quickly escalated into a loud fit of laughter. I watched him for a full minute before growing impatient, I couldn't see the joke.
"You done?" I folded my arms and gave him a withering look.
"I guess I should have a long conversation with Carlisle, and finally meet everyone properly." He said finally and shook his head with one last small chuckle.
Today
"I missed you." I said hugging Angela as tightly as I could without hurting her. I could feel Charlie retreat into the house, and I had no desire to follow him.
"Me too. What's going on with Charlie? I've never heard him talk to you like that before." Angela asked with concern, glancing towards the house with a worried look.
"He's been struggling since day one, I think he blames me for what happened to him." I admitted sadly, my attempts at bringing my father into our lives had been difficult at best.
"That makes no sense. Even Alice isn't really to blame. Victoria is the bad guy here." Angela said looking upset.
"I know, but I don't think he's internalizing the changes. We think his shield is blocking his emotions along with his instincts. Carlisle isn't sure, but the only explanation we can think of is that he is some kind of physical shield. When he uses his shield to tamp down his impulses, he is literally blocking off the biological aspect of his instincts. I can tell sometimes he knows he is being awful, so he lets some of those emotions through, and he almost immediately starts acting like a ravenous beast. It has to be awful for him, but at least I'm sure he isn't dangerous to you." I shrugged, it would take time and training to help him figure out how to use his gift properly.
"Mason could help him." She said immediately, and then her eyes went wide and she gasped before reeling in her emotions and tensing up.
"Eleazar is coming down from…" I started to say to ease her mind, but she shook her head.
"I know Rose told me." She sniffed a few times and gave me a thankful smile.
"I'm so glad to see you, I stocked the fridge with your favorites. Let me cook your dinner." I offered, but she looked at me strangely.
"You don't eat." She sounded dismissive, almost disbelieving as if I was doing something for her just to cheer her up.
"No, but food still smells wonderful, and I do like to cook. Indulge me, It'll make me feel human for once." I said giving more reasons than I had, and it was true. I wished food tasted as good as it smelled to me.
"Alright, something simple though. My stomach has been iffy all week." She said moving her hand to her stomach and wincing slightly.
"Simple, I can do that." I said with a nod. We went into the house and directly to the kitchen which had only been used for fake family dinners when Angela, Tyler and I would visit. It was now stocked exclusively for Angela, and I already had a plan for her dinner. The easy distraction let my mind wander, and the first place it went; my mother.
Renée. I had to think long and hard about that problem. Mom had clearly hit rock bottom, and as much as Charlie's blunt and rather emotionless accusation hurt, there was a painful ring of truth to it. I had left her in Arizona so she could spend more time with Phil, and then I left again when I chose this life. Well at least I knew the consequences, I knew I would have to sever ties with my family, it was one of Carlisle's conditions. I just hadn't thought it would hit her this badly, a suicide attempt.
I toyed briefly with the idea of turning her for Charlie, but it felt wrong somehow for reasons I couldn't quite put my finger on. Still my father would need someone, or else he would be attached to me forever. I shuddered at that thought. The family was already getting dangerously large, especially if Mason and Angela were included in that number. If we included a mate for Charlie, which was more than a little uncomfortable to think of, we would grow to a staggering eleven members. Way too many to live under one roof. Still with dad and Mason being obviously older, we could possibly create a new dynamic and live under two households as a cover.
There was also the possibility that Mason and Angela might not join us permanently. Assuming of course that he returned from this trip to the Volturi. Or if Edward and Emmett survived their encounter with Victoria if they ever found her. I shut my eyes and took a deep breath and had to fight against the pull of Angela's human scent. My mind was swimming with the chaos of family, until Alice's vision leaped up to the front and center of my concentration. Danger and death were coming, and we were seriously unprepared for it. Including myself, Charlie and Angela, our large family would likely have three newborns. That was dangerous on a good day. To have us actively participate in a dangerous situation, well that could be disastrous.
"You okay?" Angela asked unexpectedly, watching me as I cooked and got lost in my own thoughts.
"Mom, and other things. I hope she's okay." I said simply, not wanting to bring up all the rest of my questions with no answers, especially regarding Mason. She clearly didn't need any more burden to carry.
"We were thinking we should call Phil, maybe get him up here." Angela suggested, and I couldn't help but smile at the idea. It made far too much sense and couldn't figure out why I hadn't thought of it first.
"Not a bad idea, I have his number. It could be problematic though, they didn't exactly part on the best of terms." I said working through the potential issues.
"What happened?" She asked, and I felt myself sigh remembering the drama.
"I don't have the full story, but basically Mom came up here to spend time with me. It was supposed to be a week, which turned into a month. After awhile Phil showed up and offered to stay with her to help. I don't know why, but she rejected him and sent him away. They haven't spoken since. The only thing I could think of, was she must've been too focused on me and couldn't imagine splitting that time with him." I shrugged, not sure of anything when it came to my mother. I felt my hands move, a little startled I was still cooking a meal and marveled at how easy it was to multitask.
"I'm sorry Bella. If that is the case, he might still be waiting for her, and now might be the perfect time for him to just show up." She made the kind of sense that would work in romantic fiction, but I wasn't sure about real life. I had to stop and giggle at that line of thought, real was a word that no longer had much meaning to me anymore since I had fallen into a world of fantasy monsters and become a member of the undead… were we undead? I would have to remember to talk to Emmett when he got back, he was the one who had seen and read every work of vampire fiction out in the world.
"Angela, you've always been the romantic, do you really think he's still down in Florida waiting for something that might never happen?" I said expressing my more dismissive thoughts on the concept of romance.
"Does he even know you are 'dead'?" She asked, and I realized I had assumed he was told.
"Well… I don't know. I thought mom would've told him." I felt horrible, he was someone I had lived with for over a year. I liked him, and he had made some real attempts to be a stepfather to me.
"Her actions have been pretty erratic, she behaved horribly at your wake and funeral. Yet, today when I found her, she knew I was trying to help her and rejected that help, but then left her hotel room door open. I don't think she's actually suicidal, I think she's lost. I always thought that you were more mature than her during most of her visits. She would say things that were just, weird." Angela brought up some valid and painfully intuitive points. Mom was notorious for dramatics and cries for help, and the idea that she was suicidal felt wrong in a way that was bothering me.
"That's mom. The forty-year-old teenager." I said with bitter sarcasm.
"Harsh." Angela said with small frown, the joke didn't sit well for either of us.
"True, when I was in Phoenix, I kept her checkbook balanced, her bills paid, made sure food was on the table, did most of the shopping, and still had to do chores and homework." I wasn't exaggerating, but after I said it, I felt petty.
"So, you didn't just leave because you wanted your mom to be happy?" Angela asked thoughtfully, asking a question I didn't really have an answer for. I thought about it for a moment before responding.
"I think her happiness was the primarily reason why I left, but I have to admit it was nice to get away from someone who depended on me that heavily. Plus, with Phil there I wasn't worried about the big stuff anymore. Although neither of them can cook." I found myself chuckling at the thought of them in the kitchen trying to make one of mom's notoriously bad food experiments. Then a tickle of a memory came to me, washed in the fires of transition. I remembered her theatrics at my wake, and her declaration that she would be okay, and that she had called Phil. "Wait, my god, she lied to me. She never called Phil."
"Damn. Okay, what's his number?" Angela asked pulling out her phone.
"Now?" I said with surprise, although there was no reason to delay, except maybe the timing wasn't right.
"Should we wait until she's out of the hospital?" She pondered out loud, and then thought the better of it. "When she's fully capable of rejecting him?"
"Point. Here's my new phone, he's in the contact list." I said handing her the phone Carlisle gave me after the situation with Edward. I still hadn't used it except to shop online. She immediately dialed, and I could hear the familiar ring as if I had the phone pressed to my ear. It picked up after five rings.
"Hello?" His voice was clear and brought back some human memories I had mostly forgotten.
"Phillip Dwyer?" She asked simply.
"That's me." He said with a small tired sigh, which made me wonder what was going on in his life.
"My name is Angela Weber." She started, and he immediately reacted to her name.
"Bella's Angela?" He asked sounding a bit too happy to make a connection to me.
"Yes, I'm that Angela." She said with a small smile.
"I'm glad to hear from anyone up in Forks, it's been a minute. But why are you calling me? Is something wrong with Bella or Renée?" He sounded curious, but cautious and a little worried.
"Yes, that's why I'm calling. Renée is in the hospital." Angela said sympathetically.
"Oh god, how badly is she hurt?" He replied quickly and with obvious and urgent concern.
"Physically I'm pretty sure she'll be fine. But she's not doing well at all. I was hoping you could help; she doesn't have anyone right now." Angela dropped the real news, and there was silence for several seconds.
"What do you mean she doesn't have anyone, what about Bella and Charlie?" His voice was shaking, and I couldn't tell if it was from anger, fear or sadness.
"Bella died a couple of weeks ago, and Charlie disappeared about ten days ago." Her words hit home with me, and there was a sound like Phil falling. It took him a while to respond, and when he did, I could tell he was crying.
"I don't understand. She didn't call me. I'll be there by tomorrow." He said with a renewed strength, and I felt a wave of relief to know he wasn't going to let mom push him away again.
"You have some time, her injury was relatively superficial, but I'm pretty sure they're going to hold her for a day or two." Angela said dancing around the hardest part of the truth.
"She hurt herself?" He guessed.
"I found her. She's been drinking pretty heavily. She might not want to see you." Angela suggested, and gave me a hopeful look, and we both clutched hands waiting for his response. Would he respond with a strong desire to fight for her?
"I'm not going to runaway with my tail between my legs again. Thank you so much for calling. I'm so sorry about Bella she was a great kid." He paused for a second before continuing. "Could you do me a favor, and not tell Renée I'm coming, I need to confront her about all this in the right way."
"Of course, goodbye Mr. Dwyer." Angela said sweetly.
"Goodbye Angela and thank you again." Phil sounded almost happy, and his enthusiasm gave me a real sense of hope that things would turn out well. Yet I wasn't sure it would be enough, and that worry almost immediately set my mind on a negative turn.
"That went surprisingly well." Angela looked hopeful as she handed me the phone back.
"Not really, Phil was deeply in love with mom, there was a reason he proposed." I let out my negativity, despite the hope I still felt, but Angela wasn't taking the bait and just shrugged.
"Speaking of proposals. Edward?" Her turn was a good attempt to change the conversation, but I wasn't sure I could talk about the proposal yet.
"Right, I've been trying not to think about that." I admitted feeling a bit foolish and more than a little selfish. I had been holding onto his proposal as a way to cope with his absence, and it wasn't fair to him.
"You know Mason said he would marry me if I felt it was a requirement to be together, I don't think he understands the concept." She said a bit unexpectedly.
"Edward does, although it's pretty antiquated." I was about to launch into my own personal issues regarding Edward, but then I absorbed the context of what she said. I shot her a shocked look and leaned in with wide eyes. "Wait, you've had sex!? I hate you so much."
"It was amazing… and the next morning he was gone." She lowered her head, and a tear fell from her right eye down her cheek.
"God Angela, I still don't get why he left. I understand Alice had a vision, but I'm still completely dumbfounded by him abandoning you like that." I was very angry at Mason, I couldn't imagine what had possessed him to give up so easily, especially with Angela giving him her heart so completely.
"Alice and I had a conversation last week about her vision. Basically, there were two possibilities; he stays here and we all die except for Alice, or he goes and only most of us die. Neither were great options, but she thinks there is a third path. One that will present itself when he is there in Volterra. Something to do with Aro." As she spoke she started to play with the fringe of her shirt, it was clear the explanation was the only way she was able to cope at all with his choice to leave.
"That's nuts." I started, but her posture made me realize I had to forgive his idiocy to support her. "But I can see why he went. A chance to save everyone versus potentially causing death of everyone he loves." Then I thought about that choice and added, "I would go."
"So would I." She said quietly. "You know, this is the first time I've felt human in a week, and I'm surrounded by vampires." She motioned around the room, and by extension the rest of the house.
"I never felt right in the human world, even when I had my legs. Maybe it just means you have fully accepted this life as your own." I said trying to interpret what she meant.
"I have, and I would want to be turned today, but I need to have one more night with my parents. I need to try and patch things up and let them know I love them." She looked wistful, sad but still determined.
"They know, but I understand…" Then a random thought occurred to me. "Rose. I am so mentally challenged."
"What about Rose?" Angela asked looking confused.
"Rose can help mom." I said with perhaps a bit too much enthusiasm.
"I'm not sure I follow." She wasn't getting what I was thinking, and I couldn't blame her. Rose hadn't flaunted her gift at all.
"She can make people do things, right? Well maybe she can help snap mom out of this funk, maybe give her a hope that me and dad are alright or something." The idea just came out, and Rosalie came into the room almost immediately shaking her head.
"I'm not sure I can do that Bella." Rose looked upset and a little terrified.
"Could you try?" I begged, and she winced and started to nod slightly.
"Of course, but I don't know how long my compulsions last. What if she relapses?" Rose tensed as she spoke, her lack of confidence in her new ability plain in her posture and voice.
"Then she will have Phil, I just need her to snap out of her funk so she can be clear headed enough to take him back." I said as a vague outline of a plan started to play out in my head. "We sneak into the hospital while she's sleeping."
"You want to go?" Angela looked deeply worried, "What if someone see's you?"
"I won't let them, and maybe Rose can cover for that." I said with an unwavering determination. Nothing was going to stop me now.
"Sure, why the fuck not." Rose said shaking her head in disbelief. "When do we start this quixotic idiocy?"
"Tonight?" I said with an overly gleeful smile.
I waited impatiently for a time when we knew the shifts changed and the skeleton night crew at the hospital took over. We snuck in using our senses to navigate a path to my mother's room without being noticed by any of the employees. I found her blissfully asleep, no machines plugged into her except for a single IV of saline and a heart monitor. The monotonous beep of the machine was quite soothing, and her peaceful expression alleviated a lot of my fears. I sat gently on the edge of her bed and let my hand hover a hairs breath above the skin of her right hand. I knew the shock of my skin on hers might be enough to wake her, so I resisted the impulse to touch her. Instead I leaned close to her ear and spoke to her so softly that it was practically inaudible.
"Me and Charlie are alive, and we will always watch over you I promise. I'm so sorry we can't be a part of your life anymore, but know that your daughter will always think of you. Please go back to Phil, try to build a life for yourself. I'm begging you to live and be happy, because I love you mom and it hurts so much to see you in pain." Then I gave her a phantom kiss on her forehead and stood ready to leave. Then Rose moved over to her and leaned close to her ear.
"Remember your daughter's words and make them a part of you. Live your life as fully as you can, knowing in your heart that Bella is out there somewhere in the universe happy with her new life. Take your husband back when he arrives, and never look back towards Forks." I could feel Rose's power even though it wasn't directed at me. I felt humbled by the feeling and could only imagine that my mother would easily bend to those commands. Then we left and I felt sure that she would be alright. My only wish was for my father to find happiness as well.
Author's Note: These last two chapters dealing with Renée felt important. It was the last aspect of Bella's life that was unresolved, and she needed to finally let go of her human past. I also needed to directly address why Charlie is acting so mean, he isn't entirely himself. The idea of his power is taken directly from SM from her version of Twilight from Edward's point of view Midnight Sun which I read years ago when she posted it on her website. The next chapter is the final of three that are more focused on family and character. I should be able to get it posted by Friday. Next week's chapters are going to be a bit of a roller-coaster as several major events take place.
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