Chapter 29

"What do you mean he's not here? He should be here," Gibbs said, feeling irritated.

"Yes, he should be," the nurse agreed. "According to our records, he signed out AMA this morning."

"Was he alone?"

"No. His wife was with him, I believe."

That was something anyway. Even if Tim shouldn't have left the hospital, at least, he was with Zahara who was more than equal to the task. Still, Gibbs did want to see how Tim was doing, so instead of going back to NCIS right away, he decided to stop off to see Tim...and perhaps lecture him on leaving the hospital too soon.

When he arrived he called up.

"It's Gibbs," he said.

The door opened for him but there was no vocal response. Now, he started getting a bad feeling in his gut. He got up to the apartment as quickly as he could and he didn't even get a chance to knock. Zahara had clearly been waiting for him.

She opened the door and hugged him tightly.

"I don't know what to do," she said and began to cry.

"Zahara, what's going on? Where's Tim?"

Zahara pulled him into the apartment and he saw Sam pushing Salma around in his wheelchair while Naomi was right there with Zahara, looking very worried.

"Where's Tim?" Gibbs asked again.

"I don't know," Zahara said.

"But they said at the hospital that he left with you."

Zahara nodded and began to cry again. Naomi put her arms around Zahara and looked at Gibbs.

"Zahara told us that Tim woke up very suddenly today and insisted on leaving the hospital. Zahara tried to convince him to stay. The doctor tried to convince him to stay. And he wouldn't say why, but he told her he needed to leave, that he couldn't come home. He had to go and be alone for a while and then he'd be back."

Gibbs' bad feeling got worse.

"I had to let him," Zahara said. "He insisted and he promised he would be back but... I did not want to let him. I wanted to hold him and not let him go, but something was so strange. It was almost not him at all. I cannot explain it, but... something was wrong. It is like I have lost him again, only... I let him go."

Gibbs hugged Zahara and shook his head.

"No, I think I know what's going on. We'll find him. He took his car?"

Zahara nodded.

"Okay. We'll start looking for him. Do you know where he would go?"

Zahara shook her head.

"Okay. We'll find him. Zahara, we'll find him."

She nodded again.

Gibbs left as quickly as he could and he called Tony. The phone went straight to voicemail. Gibbs stopped for a moment and then shook his head and just moved on. If Tony wanted to be out of touch, he'd let him for the moment.

He called Ziva.

"Yes, Gibbs?"

"Ziva, Tim left."

"What? Why?"

"I think we both know."

There was a long pause. Gibbs could imagine Ziva touching her own cheek in the place where Tim had hit her all those years ago after he'd fallen apart. That moment when they had realized how far gone Tim really was.

And Tim knew what happened when he fell apart.

And he was feeling responsible for another death.

Even with that understanding though...

"Where would he go?" Ziva asked after the moment passed.

"I don't know. Put out a BOLO. I'm going to check with the CIA. Maybe they'd already reinstated his guards, maybe not."

"That would have been fast, even for them with all that has happened."

"Yeah."

"Gibbs, what if..."

"No."

"Tony?"

"He didn't answer."

Another pause.

"Very well. I will put out the BOLO and see if I can think of anything," Ziva said, her voice carefully controlled.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x

The BOLO went out but with no hits. Gibbs checked with Andrews to see if Tim had returned to the estate, but he hadn't. Jenny checked with the CIA, but the plan had been to get the guards in place the next day and they hadn't been there. Security at the hospital had informed Roy that Tim had been checked out, but he'd been with his wife and her guards were supposed to stay with her.

Gibbs had considered going over to Tony's place to make him get back in contact, but in the end, he decided against it. Tony knew the rules and if he was deliberately breaking them right now, that would have to be the way it was.

After a day, their worries increased, but they kept it up. It was cold comfort, but at least they knew that Tim had left on his own, that he hadn't been taken by anyone.

It wasn't much, but it was something.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x

Zahara was sitting and fretting, but finally, she remembered Tim's request to find out about Levi. Glad that she could think of something to do, she called Tamara. She still felt more comfortable contacting women than men.

"Hello, this is Tamara speaking."

"Tamara, this is Zahara."

"Oh, Zahara. How is Tim doing?"

"I do not know, but not well."

"What do you mean?"

"First, I must ask. Is Levi all right?"

There was a sigh. "He will be, but he's still pretty weak right now. The doctor decided not to let him go home today and he's rather annoyed by that. I'm just glad that he's well enough to be annoyed. Now, what did you mean?"

"Tim left the hospital and he said he had to get away."

There was a muffled voice in the background and then, Zahara heard one half of the conversation.

"It's Zahara. I'll tell you later."

A muffled response.

"Levi..."

Another muffled response.

"Zahara, Levi would like to ask you some questions. Are you all right with that?"

"Is he all right to do this?"

"Yes."

"Then, I will speak to him."

There was a brief pause and then she heard Levi. His voice sounded rather weak but she could hear him.

"What is it, Levi?" she asked.

"Tim's gone?"

"Yes. He insisted on leaving the hospital, and then, he said he had to get away, to be alone."

"Do you remember his exact words?"

"No, but he said he needed time to think and to be alone. He said that he couldn't have anyone watching him, that he needed to get away but he would come back. He promised, but I don't like the way I feel about it."

"Zahara, this is very important. When you spoke to him, did you look into his eyes?"

"Yes."

"And what did you see there?"

Zahara thought back, but Tim's expression had been blank. There had been almost nothing showing at all.

"Nothing. His face was empty."

Another brief pause.

"All right. Zahara, will you trust me?"

"Yes, of course."

"Then, what I need is for you to call Agent Gibbs, get him to pick you up and then to come to the hospital and pick me up."

"No, Levi. You're not leaving the hospital yet."

"I have to, Tamara, and you're not going to convince me otherwise. I promise that I'll be sitting in a car and then sitting in a house. I won't do anything active. And when I'm done, I'll come back to the hospital and I won't even complain."

Zahara heard the silence.

"You do not have to do this, Levi," she said.

"Yes, I do, Zahara. More than anything I've ever done for Tim, this is something I absolutely have to do. Will you do what I asked?"

"Yes. I will."

"Good. I'll be waiting."

Levi hung up and Zahara stared at the phone for only a moment before calling Gibbs. She could see both Naomi and Sam staring at her, but she ignored them for the moment.

"Gibbs."

"This is Zahara," she said, again tripping over what to call him. "Are you busy?"

"No. What is it?"

"I called Tamara Carew to ask about Levi today, and he said that he needed you to pick me up and then to pick him up. He was asking about Tim. I think he may know where Tim is. Can you do this?"

"Yes. I'll be there."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

They both hung up and then Zahara looked to her in-laws.

"Can you stay with Salma?"

"Of course," Sam said. "But what is it? Are you sure about this?"

"Yes. I am very sure." Zahara walked over to Salma and knelt down. "Salma, I am going to get your baba. You will be in bed when we come home, but you will see your baba very soon."

"Baba! Baba!" Salma said, clapping, looking happier than she had in days.

Zahara kissed her and then got up again, feeling the heaviness of her pregnancy, but knowing that this was absolutely necessary. Somehow, she felt that this was her only chance to get her husband back and so she would do it.

She hugged Sam and Naomi and then left to wait for Gibbs. When she got outside, she saw Malia on guard and she deliberately walked over to her.

"I am going to get my husband. I will be with Agent Gibbs and Levi Carew. I do not know where we are going, but we are going as soon as Agent Gibbs arrives."

"All right. We'll be with you."

"Thank you, and for being with me when I was so afraid," Zahara said.

Malia smiled and nodded and then was instantly on alert when a car slowed down. Zahara recognized Gibbs' car and hurried over to it. Gibbs got out and looked at her.

"Are you all right?" he asked.

"Yes. I am ready to get Tim back."

"All right. Let's go."

x.x.x.x.x.x.x

"Levi, you can't," Tamara said.

"Tamara, I have to," Levi said.

Tamara sat down and he knew she was upset because of how worried she was, but she needed to understand what he was doing. He sat up and began carefully dressing himself. Dr. Owens had (reluctantly) removed the IV, lecturing him all the while, but Levi had ignored it. However, Tamara needed to realize what he was doing.

"Tamara... don't you wish someone had done this for me?" he asked.

Her head jerked up and met his gaze.

"Don't you wish someone had told me that I didn't need to protect my family, that I could have been with you and not destroyed you?"

She nodded mutely.

"That's what I'm doing. I've told Tim before that he didn't have to be like me. And I'm not going to let him start on the path I took in my right mind... when I know he's not in his."

"How?"

"Because Tim would never leave his family behind if he was thinking straight. And I'm not going to let him destroy himself because he's fallen into the trap of believing he'll destroy everyone else."

Tamara got up and walked over to him as he continued to dress. She stopped his hands for a moment and kissed him. Then, she hugged him tightly.

"I don't want to lose you, Levi... but I know that I would in a different way if I kept you from doing this. Just come back to me, okay? This time, come back."

Levi hugged her.

"I will."

"Promise me. I know you don't like to promise, but I want you to this time. Promise."

Levi hesitated. He didn't want his last words to her to be a lie...if they ended up being his last words. It wasn't likely but it was always a possibility.

"Please, Levi. Promise me."

He took a breath and nodded. "All right. I promise."

"Thank you."

Then, she helped him finish dressing. He was all ready to go when the door opened and Gibbs and Zahara came inside.

"Are you sure you can do this?" Gibbs asked, gruffly.

"Yes. And more importantly, I need to."

"All right. Let's go."

Levi nodded and followed them out. They got into Gibbs' car and Gibbs looked at Levi expectantly.

"Where are we going?"

"To the cabin that Tamara and I have."

"I thought it was destroyed."

"It was. I had it rebuilt, and once I told Tim that he could go there if he ever needed a break from the world. This is where he's gone."

Gibbs raised an eyebrow, and Levi knew he was thinking of how sure he'd been when searching for Tim and Zahara out in the desert.

"This is actually a lot more certain than storm clouds, Agent Gibbs."

A reluctant smile, and Gibbs started them off.

It was a long drive to the cabin, but the car was mostly silent. Every so often Zahara would say something or she would start humming softly, but there was very little conversation. In fact, Levi reclined the seat and tried to let himself rest as he knew he needed.

After a couple of hours, they were nearing the cabin and Levi sat up, prepared to do battle.

"Agent Gibbs, you need to let me go in first."

"Excuse me?" Gibbs said.

"I need to go in and talk to Tim alone first."

"Why?"

"Because I know why he's doing this. I know what he's doing and I need to be the one to tell him not to do it."

"You think no one else can understand?"

"The way that I do? Absolutely not. This is a situation that you have not experienced, Agent Gibbs. I have. I'm not saying that I'll do everything. I can't, but there is a part I must do that comes before anything else. He won't listen to you if he doesn't listen to me, first."

"How do you know?"

Levi smiled sadly. "Because he didn't listen to his wife. Tim isn't thinking right and he needs someone who understands his skewed perspective talking to him right now. So you need to let me go in first."

"Can you make it?" Gibbs asked, actually sounding very slightly concerned.

"As long as I can sit down quickly, yes."

"Zahara?" Gibbs asked, looking to the back seat where she had chosen to sit (separate from the two men in the car, even if she knew them both fairly well).

"If this will help Tim, I will wait," she said.

There was a flash of something, maybe disappointment, in Gibbs' eyes, but then, it was gone.

...and they arrived at the house. Tim's car was parked in the driveway as Levi had known it would be. Gibbs might even have been impressed.

"Go," he said.

Levi nodded and got out, hoping that he could do what he had said he needed to do.