Sasuke brought the boys to the hospital where they played with all the instruments in the rehabilitation center. He sat at the front door, staring out as Sakura performed the slow rise and fall lifts of her damaged arm. The kids' laughter broke through the morose atmosphere, lifting spirits of the occupants suffering from other ailments. There was a man in the back that lost his leg but Itachi got him into a jump rope contest. Little Sasuke was working with a woman who recently went blind. They loved it here. It wasn't torture.

They didn't watch their mother groan and twist every time she lifted her arm. They didn't blame themselves every time a tear fell down her cheek. They had no reason too.

And there was no reason to wish for a lost leg. There was no reason to beg Kami to take his arm or to go blind. He would offer up any one of these to the gods he didn't believe in, if he could get his Chakra returned to him.

He can't think that, can he? Then he would seem ungrateful. He would seem like he was a horrible man. It would mean he didn't love his wife or he wasn't a good father. That's what people would think. That's what Sakura would say. It's better to remain silent. To keep every thought, no matter how angry he is, no matter how depressed he is, it's best to keep it to himself and never let her know, or anyone else.

He thought it would get better, living without his Chakra. Two weeks have gone by and he thought by now he would have grasped life without it. The truth is, though, there isn't a thing in this world that doesn't revolve around it. Who was he kidding? He lives in a society that requires strength. Everyone he knows is Ninja. He thought he could cope with that. He was with his family, shouldn't that be enough?

There were good things that came out of becoming an average citizen. The ANBU no longer follow him. He's free to walk wherever he wants and no one says a thing to him. They do not hate. They do not curse him. He can go inside stores that he had never been accepted into before. But now, it's pity that shines in their eyes.

PITY!

Who the fuck wants their pity!

Sasuke tightened the hold upon his crossed arms and shifted in his seat.

"Sasuke." He lifted his eyes and found Sakura standing in front of him. She has her arm in the sling, carefully situated. "I got a ten minute break. I'm going to get a drink. Come with me." He glanced toward the boys. "They're fine."

Heaving to his feet, he followed her out. Even walking gravity feels ten times heavier than it used to. When will life get back to normal? He just wanted to feel normal.

Sasuke's brows knit when he finally paid attention to their surroundings. "You missed the turn." He had never been down here and the hospital was one of his knowledgeable areas.

"I wanted to grab something from one of my colleagues offices." She threw back thoughtlessly.

He thought about going back to the center. It's not that the boys wouldn't stay where they were or were in any danger, he just didn't trust as much as she did. Sakura was still under the illusion that people are friendly. Perhaps if people were as good as she thought they were, none of this would have happened. But that's neither here nor there.

Sakura entered a small empty office and flicks on a small light on the desk before she oddly comes back over with a grin on her red cheeks and grabs his wrist, shutting the door, flipping the lock. He looked down at her, "What are you doing?"

Sakura leaned against him and slightly unprepared he fell against the door, "It's been weeks since we've had time to ourselves, I thought-"

"Sakura-"

"Come on." She reached up, resting her thick lips upon his, keeping him quiet. He sighed against it, resting his hands upon her hips. Her tongue forced itself to find his own and he followed suit, playing the role that she was placing upon him. Her good hand slipped up his shirt and he jerked at the sudden cold. She giggled, breaking the kiss, "You're skittish. You scared, Sasuke?"

He glared down at her, "The boys can't be left for long."

"Then let's be quick. Five minutes should do." He snorted causing her wild grin. "Oh, what, like it hasn't happened before." She pulled him to the desk and as much as he resisted he found her strength too much. He stumbled and caught himself on the table, realizing then she was using chakra. She continued to kiss his neck but his anger was beyond feeling any of her touches.

His own wife more powerful than himself. There was something about that, that made him irrational. He pushed her, against her injured arm and she instantly cried out, darting away to comfort her arm. Tears were already building in her gaze from the pain. He sat on the desk, dropping his head. The sudden spark of rage fleeting and replaced with guilt.

Sakura rubbed the tears from her cheeks. "You did that on purpose. Why?" Her face screwed up in anger, "I was using chakra. I forgot. I didn't do it to hurt you or to be malicious. But you did." She swallowed shaking her head.

Sasuke got up and stepped around her, "We have to get back."

He's always the bad guy isn't he? He always the one to blame. Why can't she see that there isn't a Soul in this shell anymore? The reason he's kicking at all is because of his children and of her. If they left him, he would gladly curl up in a hole somewhere and die full of shame and regret. This is not what he strove all his life to become. This is not what Itachi saved him for. This is not what the Uchiha crest is supposed to represent.

His children can carry on his legacy. They will erase his memory and make him proud.

After another half hour of rehab, the four of them walked home together. Sasuke carried Little Sasuke in his arms and Itachi was running ahead of them, kicking at random things and throwing rocks in different directions. Sakura was silent. He would have to apologize to her at some point. Would he get her to understand what's going on in his head? No. Never.

"Itachi." Sakura's sudden fear gained his attention and he lifted his gaze but there was nothing different then before. She moved to run but by then he realized what caused her worry. Three men arrived, one snatching a hold of Itachi by his little arms.

The man was familiar. It was the same guy that started this whole thing. Because Sasuke couldn't control the curse that plagued, he attacked that man and several dozen others. All because of this scrawny young brat. Hate pulled fiercely in his chest. Wouldn't it be a perfect ending, if this kid killed him? This stranger would get his revenge and Sasuke would die a warrior's death? It sounds like a win-win.

Sasuke put his son down. "Stay with your mother."

Sakura, panic-stricken looked back at him, "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to defend you. Or are you going to steal my pride more and make me sit here with my son while you, injured and with barely any chakra of your own, fight for me?"
"Don't be a chauvinist. It doesn't matter to me if you don't want to face it, but the fact is, I'm stronger than you. You will stay here with Sasuke."

"We are nearly equal in our chances considering your injury. Since my fighting abilities didn't get taken from me along with my chakra, I think I have the better chances of victory. Now for once Sakura, do what I say."

"No."

Sasuke smirked and met her glinting eye. She was taking as much pleasure in this as he was. The excitement of battle even knowing they would lose changed them. He loved her. He hoped she knew that.

Sasuke ran at his challengers, ignoring Sakura's call of his name. He never saw the fist hit his face but he did feel the ground when it met the force of his body. He coughed hard, attempted to push himself quickly back upon his feet. He head felt like a hammer had just swiped his entire face. Blood piled in his mouth and spat on the dirt floor. A single punch and he never wanted to stand again. This is what it's like for regular people.

A foot slammed into his stomach and all the air squeezed from his lungs. He curled into a ball, incapable of gasping for breath. He huffed and wheezed, sucking in dirt as his lungs contracted against the pain.

He could hear his sons' cry. He could hear Sakura only vaguely. She was fighting someone else. She must be because the ground shook. She took her battle far from the boys and from him so as not to hurt them. She's always thinking of them. So why doesn't she understand what's going on inside his head?

Her sudden cry came sharp in his ear and he lifted his head up to see her body land not twenty feet from his own. She was upon her knees and blood soaked her shirt. She held her bandaged arm and stared at her opponent with bitter eyes. Her breath came rapidly. It was too much after her rehab. She used up most of her reserves to help her wound. To fight right after is too much.

Itachi and Little Sasuke stood side by side in the enemies' hold. Would they hurt them? Who knows? But if he died here, he wouldn't be around to find out. He couldn't make things right with Sakura. He couldn't teach the twins anything about the Uchiha clan. He couldn't pass on any of their secrets. Why did he want to die again? Because he doesn't have chakra? Yes, it sucks but it isn't everything.

Get up and fight, Sasuke.

Do something.

Fight for them.

He felt a spark. A burst trickle down into his veins and he jumped to his feet, shoving a fist into his opponent's face. He caught them by surprise and they tripped over themselves falling to the ground. He touched his cheek, a cut lip.

Sasuke stared at his hand. Had it been Chakra? Was it there? Was it hiding deep within him, waiting for his attention? Waiting for his emotion to tap into it?

*Cough* *Cough* The subtle noise was loud and booming, cutting through the twins cries and gaining everyone's eyes. Kakashi sat on a nearby fence reading his book with a sleepy eye. He waved, "Hello." Yukari glared with her purple eyes, smashing her fist into the opposite palm.

Behind them, stood twenty-five ninjas ready for battle.

When the three troublemakers were in proper custody, the twins rushed to their parents' arms, only to flip-flop after they cried enough into one shoulder, yearning for the other. Sasuke held a hand to his side, which no doubt was quite bruised. He hadn't dealt with this type of pain in a long while and he hoped to never experience it again.

Sakura came within reach, he wrapped an arm around her and forced a long, drawn-out kiss that had her giggling and embarrassed by the end of it. The boys held their laughter behind tiny hands. He wiped the blood from her cheek.

She pushed a small black bang from his forehead, "Are you okay, now?" Concern knitted upon her brow.

Several different moments sprung to mind. Instances when he thought his life was over, only to realize, it's arrived at the inevitable part that it's been reborn. He can dwell on all the things that he's lost, but he would miss out on all the many things he's gained. Everything that he's been through has led him to here: Absolute freedom. It's been obtained. Perhaps it's never been out of his reach, it's just been buried too far deep for him to grasp. Now, without the curse, he's no longer trapped by the chains of his past.

Itachi and Little Sasuke tug on his pant leg. Yukari steps into the line of sight. And Sakura gazes at him. Everything he could ever hope of having within reach. "Yeah. I'm good."

love is not lost, it dies like all things do

buried in the backyard where a lone dove cries

and waits for broken wings to heal...to fly again someday- A Desert in the Heart