Help Wanted

By Shin Sankai

#

Author's Note: I must admit, I'm not sure if I'm truly happy with the chapter, but I am my worst critic. I actually found it quite difficult to write up so I'm unsure how anyone is going to take it. Favourably I hope.

I also think I'm getting excited because I am nearing the end and the fact it has nearly been out for an entire year too! I'm just eager to put this story to bed and start a new project.

Anyway, moving on from that, lets see how it all unfolds from here. We're nearly over the angst and into the happiness so please be patient. By the end of this chapter I hope your hearts will lighten for Malec. I kind of found it cute the way I ended the chapter, so I hope someone does as well?

As previously mentioned there is talk of what happened to Magnus when he was young in here (as well as nameless others too). For me, even though I'm not completely happy with everything in here, it is a very important Magnus and Asmodeus chapter. I hope it shows to you how Asmodeus truly cares and that there is hope for the both of them to move forward.

Warning, if anyone was thinking of some grand spectacle for Camille's downfall, you will be sadly disappointed. I didn't want to drag it out or turn it into a major thing because I wanted to focus on the recovery of Magnus and everything about his past, his relationship with his father and also with Alec too. Like Raphael always said, she needs to be but a 'blip' in the memory bank. She is truly not worth any of our time, even though she seriously needs help herself, but she isn't the focus here so lets all remember that. She may have been a catalyst of Magnus' downfall, but in a sense we can thank her for now its all out and there is only one way from here for Malec and that is UP!

Again, as previously mentioned, I was in a Ruelle mood so we have the following songs in here: Find You (Alec), Take It Out On You (Magnus) and Recover (Malec)

Enjoy!

#

Chapter 24: Nowhere to Run, Nowhere to Hide

"MAGNUS!" Alec yelled again as he ran to the fallen man's side, boots crunching broken glass as he kneeled at the fallen man's side. He wasn't sure if he should touch, but in the end, he couldn't help himself. Alec needed to touch Magnus. His shaky fingers quickly pressed against his neck, hating how cold Magnus' skin was and searched for his pulse point, relief flooding him as their was a faint one there.

Alec carefully pulled Magnus into his arms, placing his head into his lap and noticed the blood on his face which brought tears to his eyes.

"Oh god... Magnus..." Alec couldn't help but try and brush some of it away with his bare hands and also the sleeve of his sweater. The slight movement seemed to shift Magnus a little in his embrace and Alec observed his limp hand fall to the cold concrete, fingers partially clenched around a brightly coloured object. Alec's breath immediately caught in his throat.

Within Magnus' limp grip was the omamori he gave him for his birthday.

"You've kept it on you all this time." Alec brokenly voiced, knowing he wasn't going to get a response and hunched over the fallen man trying to shield him and keep him warm and protected until help arrived. "I'm so sorry Magnus." Alec continued to ramble away, almost rocking back and forth in his kneeling position. "I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to realise your pain, your disdain for the choices you made. I'm sorry you hate yourself so much. I'm sorry you felt trapped and had to tell me everything you weren't ready to tell me. I'm sorry I wasn't patient enough to wait. I made you reveal your past to me and you felt you had no choice but to break up with me. That you thought I wouldn't be able to accept all of you... I'm so sorry..." In some small pathetic way Alec hoped the man could hear him, feel him all around him, wanting so desperately to keep him safe, just like Magnus had always made him feel. Alec jerked his head up, not sure when he had started to cry as he heard the distinct sound of sirens in the background. "Its going to be alright. Help is coming." Alec murmured once more, stroking fingers through Magnus' limp and blood soaked hair. "Stay with me. By the angel Magnus, just stay with me."

Tears continued to fall down Alec's cheeks as he could hear faint music coming from inside Magnus' home, the lyrics burning deep within his soul...

I can hear the sound
Of your barely beating heart
Pieces on the ground
From a world that fell apart

Just hold on
It won't be long

I will find you here inside the dark
I will break through
No matter where you are
I will find you
I will find you

Like the wind that cries
I can feel you in the night
A distant lullaby
Underneath the shattered sky

Just hold on
It won't be long

I will find you here inside the dark
I will break through

No matter where you are
I will find you
I will find you

I'll be the light that leads you home
When there's nowhere left to go
I'll be the voice you always know
When you're lost and all alone
I won't let you go

I will find you here inside the dark
I will break through no matter where you are
I will find you here inside the dark
I will break through no matter where you are
I will find you
I will find you

Alec jerked from the haunting lyrics of the song when a hand rested on his shoulder, his blurry eyes finally making out his sister.

"Iz..." She had left the crying Madzie with Alaric, worried about what the youngster had said about her father and also worried about what Alec might come upon too. When she'd finally made it upstairs, her heart bled as she saw her big brother silently crying and holding a very unresponsive Magnus in his lap. Carefully she walked closer, eyes flickering about as she tried to assess the situation, noticing the shattered glass, the spilt liquid and the blood. There were also some abrasions against his bare arms, having fallen into the shattered glass and his golden-bronze skin was cut several times.

"Let me take a look at him." Alec couldn't let go, he wouldn't, but he nodded consent as Izzy began to check Magnus, all the while the sirens were getting closer and closer.

"Is he... Is he going to be alright?"

"They'll have to run multiple tests, but I won't lie Alec, he looks very weak." Alec chewed on his lip. "His pulse rate is very faint and slow. The fact he hit his head too..." Noise came from inside the apartment, Izzy not being able to finish what she was saying as she got up and made her way inside.

Two paramedics were there and she gave them a brief overview of her findings, also passing them three medication bottles she had spied on Magnus' coffee table. One was a very strong antibiotic so Magnus was dealing with some form of infection whilst another bottle contained drugs for sleeping and then of course the final bottle was antidepressants. Izzy could only imagine the three combined, along with alcohol had really messed with Magnus' weak system and caused his collapse. Of course she was speculating and directed the men out to the balcony and carefully and slowly had to pull her fighting brother away so they could look Magnus over.

She knew how much Alec didn't want to leave Magnus, but they stayed close, her eyes every now and then drifting down to one of Alec's which was clutched at his chest, a brightly coloured item clenched within his hand whilst his worried blue eyes would not stop looking the unconscious man over.

#

(Mt Sinai...)

Alec was sitting anxiously in a waiting room, hands clenched in his lap, crusted with Magnus' blood. Earlier, Izzy had been right at his side, trying to console him and ease his worry, stating Magnus was in the best place to assess his situation, but Alec was too lost in his thoughts to pay much attention.

Now he sat alone, feeling colder then he ever felt in his life with nothing and no one around him as he awaited news on the fallen man. It had felt like days, but was merely hours since he had come upon Magnus' unconscious state.

Izzy had left over an hour ago, not wanting to leave him, but there had been some emergency that she was called away for and Alec had told her to go. She was going to ring and advise her work of a family emergency and she couldn't come in, but Alec had said he was fine and would keep her posted on any outcomes regarding Magnus. He knew Izzy didn't want to leave him, but she did so after giving him a tight hug, her murmurs that she was sure everything was going to be fine and then kissed the top of his head as she left.

Alec's eyes were drawn to the omamori he held onto for dear life, foot tapping impatiently and also still staring at the crusted blood on his right hand. He knew he should go and wash his hands, but he just couldn't. Not yet. What if they came when he wasn't there and he'd miss finding out any small amount of information. He wasn't even sure if he would be told anything when they were not family. That thought made his stomach churn. He hoped whatever specialist would come out and see how pitiful he looked they would give him some leeway and feel sorry for him and at least give him a small semblance of hope that Magnus was going to be alright.

"Alec?" He jerked up, cut from his thoughts and found Catarina of all people walking towards him!

"Catarina!" Alec immediately shot to his feet, almost feeling a bit stupid when he remembered which hospital the ambulance had screamed towards and realised that Magnus' dear friend did indeed work here. "You're back working?"

"I'm still in my trial period after my absence. Plus I'm not doing the hours I did previously too." Alec jerked his head into a nod since he knew what the woman had been going through and was glad to see she was doing alright. She looked a lot healthier then when he last saw her which was at the opening of Biscuit and Bane.

"H-How is Magnus?" Alec was a nervous wreck, anxious for news. When his eyes flickered to the clock on the wall, he'd realised that over five hours had passed.

"He's just gone through a series of tests, checking his heart and lungs, brain function and a bunch of blood has also been taken too." Catarina gestured towards the door and Alec staggered on his weak legs as they slowly walked down the hallway. "Please thank your sister for she brought to our attention the medication Magnus has been on. They shouldn't be mixed together, let alone with alcohol, but it appears that is what has happened and Magnus collapsed." Alec nodded his head. "What we do know for certain is the fact he hit his head on the corner of the table and also smashed it onto the concrete too. Nothing broke his fall." Alec's hand immediately curled into his shirt over his heart. He thought he was going to be sick. "The blood you noticed, not only from the side of his head but also coming from his mouth is due to the fact that Magnus bit his tongue on reflex when he collapsed." Alec chewed on his bottom lip in pure worry. "The most worrying is we do not know how long he's been out for and whether he ever went without oxygen to the brain."

"Ma-Madzie found him and...and she was very worried because he wouldn't wake up and so in her panic she went in search of help. I was talking to my sister on the street when she went running straight past Alaric and then saw me. It looks like she was home sick from school and..."

"Looks like? Why do you speculate, surely you would know? You and Magnus..." Alec diverted his gaze, teeth digging into his lower lip harder as he didn't want to look at her angered gaze once she realised that he and Magnus were no longer together. That he had hurt Magnus and made him break up with him. "Oh Alec..." His eyes shot up at the sadness in her voice. "Just what has my silly friend done?"

"Why do you automatically assume Magnus has done something?"

"I know him well." He frowned at that, pretty sure she didn't know all of Magnus' secrets, especially what he shouted at him before breaking up with him, but it was not his place to say. "Magnus is not as one dimensional as he sometimes makes himself out to be. He's multi-layered but that can frighten people away. He's got a lot of baggage, even stuff I know he's not told me about." Alec peaked up through the gaps in his bangs as this was one smart woman, but she didn't seem to hold any grudges towards Magnus for keeping bits about himself to himself. She'd known him for years ad yet she'd never pressured him to open up to her, whereas Alec had known Magnus for like three months and had grown impatient. Guilt bubbled within him as he frowned deeply at his own childish ways. Camille had certainly played her mind games well with him. "Magnus has a hard time opening up about himself. You and I both know how he's been burned in the past." Alec jerked his head into a nod, breaking from his thoughts at what Catarina was saying. "Its why he doesn't like showing his true self, because sometimes I think even Magnus doesn't understand himself. He doesn't trust himself. And when he does, when he accepts things about himself, because the one he truly cares about is accepting him too, when that happens, for Magnus, its time to run because he doesn't believe himself worth it. He doesn't believe he's worth loving unconditionally."

"Catarina..." He faulted as she placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"He pushed you away didn't he? He shared more of himself then he probably wanted to, or was ready to, and he pushed you out of his life, am I right?" Alec couldn't help but nod, though he didn't want her to get angry at him since it was his fault. He had backed Magnus into a corner and gave him no option but to blurt out all his past. "That idiot." Catarina let out a sigh and shifted her warm gaze to the young man looking absolutely wrecked in front of her. "Alec I'm certain beyond anything in this world that that was the last thing Magnus would have wanted to do. He only pushes away, when he truly begins to care. And when he truly cares, Magnus begins to love. When that happens, Magnus panics. Is past has messed him up something shocking that the thought of loosing someone he completely commits to once more just..."

"Its okay." Alec cut her off. "I mean its not, but, when he wakes up, when he gets better, we've a lot to talk about, if Magnus wasn't to talk that is." Alec watched Catarina frown, worry evident in her gaze.

"Its been a bit hectic since Magnus' admission. He's been poked and prodded and various tests have been run as I said before. We've done a thorough CT Scan which took awhile and due to his fall, Magnus does have some internal injuries along with his current medical issues."

"Issues?"

"His immune system is very weak. I suspect he's not been looking after himself, nor has he been eating properly for quite sometime now. Definitely over days." Alec frowned deeply at that. "He's lost drastic weight and Magnus wasn't exactly a big man to begin with. He's also fighting quite a serious chest infection, which has flared since he wasn't exactly dressed properly for the chilly weather. Its possible he was very close to contracting pneumonia, but we think we've caught it just in time." Alec let out a sigh of relief, knowing just how serious a condition that could be if untreated. "From the medications your sister found, Magnus is on a high dose of sleeping tablets and antidepressants."

"Oh..." Any thought of Magnus being in any pain, physically or mentally broke Alec's heart.

"Did you truly not know?" Alec shook his head. They'd been separated for two weeks now after all. "I've finally been able to move Magnus to a private room. He does have a skull fracture, along with some superficial cuts and abrasions from when he fell on the smashed glass, but he's also got a badly bruised hip too. Its possible there is a hairline fracture there. Due to his poor health, we are currently flushing his kidneys to try and stave off any internal organ damage he may have caused himself. Its also taken us awhile to provide any updates because we had to monitor his brain activity and the hairline fracture to see if there was possible bleedings to the brain."

"Is... Is there?"

"Not that we can see." Alec let out a sigh of relief. "Whilst we have great concerns over all of Magnus' medical conditions, we are of the belief he will make a full recovery." Alec felt a tiny smile reach his lips but the worrying look in Catarina's eyes made it vanish in seconds.

"What aren't you telling me?"

"Due to the fact Magnus is being pumped with fluids and medications, and the fact it has been over five hours since his admittance, we thought he'd awaken by now but he hasn't done so."

"Is that...uncommon?"

"Its not unheard of, but its unsettling as to why he's not waking up. He's not in a coma or anything, but he's not responding to us and that is a cause for concern." Blue eyes rose to look up at Catarina, Alec trying to understand what that all meant. "Magnus isn't responding to any stimulus right now. Its almost like he's in a really deep sleep and its worrying because we don't know if there will be any permanent damage done. For now, as horrible as it is, we're just going to have to continue to monitor his progress and wait and see."

"Ok..."

"During all this, I had to request a colleague give Madzie a light sedative. She's resting on the couch in Magnus' private room as I didn't want her to be separated from her father." Alec gave a nod before his eyes finally caught sight of the ticking clock on the wall. "Oh shit! The boys!" He gasped aloud knowing Magnus wasn't there to pick them up from school.

"Alec, relax, when I heard it was Magnus that was being admitted and saw you and Madzie close behind him as he was being wheeled into emergency, I quickly sent Raphael a message of what had happened and to collect the boys." He sighed in relief. "He's going to get them settled in with his neighbour and he'll be here soon himself as any harm that comes to Magnus really affects Raphael." Alec nodded at that knowing the close relationship between them. "He'll also need time to figure out what to tell the boys about their father too and would want all the facts first before telling them something. He will not sugar coat it, always being truthful to a fault, but he won't want them to cry either, though we know they will."

"Thank you."

"Now, I've delayed you long enough as I can tell you are beyond worried." She watched those blue eyes shift to look up at her once more. "Would you like to see him?" Alec nodded profusely.

"Please!" She smiled sweetly at him. They may be broken up, but Alec couldn't just flip a switch in his heart and turn off how much he cared for Magnus or his children. He just wasn't built that way. He took comfort from Catarina when she took hold of his shaking hand and they quietly moved down the corridors and then stopped in front of a closed door.

"Alec, how long have you and Magnus been...separated?" How nice of her to use that word instead of 'broken up' which still ripped at Alec's heart daily.

"Two weeks now." Alec softly confirmed even though to him it had felt like an eternity. Catarina realised then and there that the boys had broken up sometime after New Years. Magnus had been a bit off, but he didn't want to talk about anything, saying he was just feeling tired and she didn't push. Now she knew she should have.

"You need to prepare yourself for what you will see. Magnus is very weak right now. He is nothing like how he was when the two of you were together." Alec sucked in a breath as it lodged in his throat when she opened the door and they both stepped inside. Magnus was resting in the stark white bed. He was terribly pale, a bandage was around his head and he was hooked up to a variety of machines that beeped away. There was a drip in his arm feeding him fluids and medications a plenty and the right side of his face was swollen and bruised, likely from when he had fallen. There were also cuts, scrapes and abrasions on his forearms and along with the sunken cheeks, you could clearly see the bags under his eyes. Even the hospital attire looked alarmingly saggy on Magnus.

"Oh god..." Alec gripped Catarina's hand tighter as they were now standing by his bedside. Alec felt tears well in his eyes as he finally took a more thorough look at Magnus now. The dear man didn't have an ounce of make-up or product in his hair. Everything was limp and lifeless, just as he seemed to be in the bed. Magnus' usual glow was no longer present and Catarina was not joking when she stated Magnus had lost an alarming amount of weight!

Alec chewed on his bottom lip. This was not who Alec had fallen for. This was Magnus in all of his vulnerability. The perfect image of the man in Alec's mind was obliterated.

His shaky hand reached out, but Alec quickly drew it back to his side, nails digging into his own flesh, causing crescent moons. He didn't want to hurt Magnus anymore then he clearly already was, too afraid to touch him at the moment.

Just looking upon him now, Alec began to wonder if this is what Magnus had felt like when he'd seen him in the hospital bed after the car accident. How powerless and useless he felt. How all he wanted to do was wrap Magnus up in his arms, talk to him and kiss him and tell him everything was going to be alright because he was here now. He was here to protect him because he'd come back for him. For him and the kids because he wanted to be in their lives. Nowhere else made sense to Alec except at Magnus' side.

"Why don't you sit by his side, I'll just check on Madzie." Alec jerked his head into a nod and pulled one of the two chairs near the wall over to Magnus' hospital bed and gingerly sat down.

Catarina switched her attention between her sleeping daughter and Alec to see the young man pressed something into Magnus' hand before closing his fingers around it and then just sat quietly at his side, chewing sweetly and worriedly on his lip. She could only imagine what was going on in his head of what Magnus had been up to these past couple of weeks, which when looking at him, wasn't good. As a friend to the man lying in the hospital bed, Catarina was worried too. They'd been friends for years and she hadn't seen the pain he was hiding. She began to ponder just how Raphael would be feeling too. She was sure their friend would be muttering away in Spanish for sure.

#

Another couple of hours had passed and Catarina had returned to her shift. A friend of hers was the nurse in charge of Magnus and promised to keep her informed on his progress or changes in his current situation. At the moment, aside from his poor health, it truly looked like Magnus was just sleeping.

Alec had broken his staring of Magnus and had gone to check on Madzie now. He had been praying the man would just awaken to see him creepily watching him, maybe even tease him about it too, but it never happened. He was now kneeling by the couch where Madzie was curled up under his jacket when he jerked on the spot as a hand rested on his shoulder, making his blue eyes jerk up. He hadn't even heard anyone enter the room, lost in all his thoughts and found warm dark eyes looking down at him.

"Raphael..." Alec squeezed the man's hand on his shoulder before rising to his full height. "How did this happen?" Alec mumbled as the both of them shifted over to Magnus' bedside.

"He's been really messed up since breaking up with you." Alec's stomach churned at that. He was certain more then ever that Magnus still liked him, still felt something for him, but the man had still broken his heart.

"Me too..." Alec softly confessed, mainly to himself, but was sure Raphael had heard him, though chose not to comment on it.

"I asked him to seek help. He even called me to say his father made an appointment for him."

"His father..." Raphael could see the confusion in the furrowing of Alec's brows.

"I don't even know how or why he ended up at his father's place, but the fact he was making an appointment to talk about his past..."

"Its a step forward." Alec softly finished for Raphael, the shorter man nodding his head in agreement.

"We've been helping him juggle looking after the kids whilst he goes to his appointments. I don't ask him to talk about it, but as the days passed, I thought he was making some progress." Raphael let out a sigh. "Perhaps he has had a setback."

"If he was pressured to talk about something he isn't ready for..." Alec shook his head, guilt swirling once more. "Well, I know he'd clam up over it so maybe its something like that."

"Maybe..." Raphael was almost positive it was that. He had to go on a business trip these past couple of days and hadn't been having lengthy conversations over the phone with his brother which worried him. Magnus was always a great chatter, but the fact Raphael was out talking him in their phone conversations meant something was truly wrong. "Magnus has been working all hours at the gallery, spending most days in the attic according to Clary and he's also been taking on some independent photography jobs as well."

"Take that into account along with not eating or sleeping and the chest infection he has and of course Magnus was going to drop." Raphael quietly nodded at Alec's words.

"Do you know if anyone has called his father?"

"Oh!" Alec gasped. In all the panic he'd not contact Asmodeus at all. "I better make the call."

"Want me to do it?"

"I got this." Alec placed his hand on Raphael's forearm. "Why don't you sit with him and talk to him for a bit? I'm sure you being here will give him comfort. I'll take the call outside." He received a quiet nod of thanks as Raphael sat down, silently taking hold of his brothers hand, murmuring in Spanish to him. Alec pondered as to whether Raphael was telling Magnus off, affectionately of course, for worrying him the way he currently was.

Alec stepped out of the room, sitting on a seat in the corridor and pulled out his phone to give Asmodeus Bane a call no one wanted to get about their child, no matter how old they were, or how fractured your relationship was, being in hospital.

When his call went unanswered, he had to go the long way, through reception channels and finally after what felt like forever he was on the phone to George and had to go through the process of introducing himself since he wasn't truly introduced to the man, but it felt kind of nice when George remembered him and made comment that he was Magnus' boyfriend, even though they weren't together anymore.

Glossing over that, Alec quickly relayed the fact that Magnus was in hospital and needn't even get anymore then that out as George had responded with a 'we are on our way' and hung up on him!

Alec was quite surprised, but shouldn't be since he knew how much Asmodeus loved his son, when he had arrived within the hour, dropping everything as he stood at the door lightly puffing, clearly having run from where George parked the car. Alec saw a look of surprise flash across Asmodeus' eyes at seeing him there, but within seconds his emotions were contained, smoothing down his grey business jacket and walked inside, closing the door softly behind him. George waited out in the corridor.

Raphael had already left, having disappeared half an hour earlier, needing to return to some crisis in the office, but he also picked Madzie up, without waking her, and took her to be with her brothers. She would get comfort from being surrounded by her protective little princes. Alec was very grateful for that, as he would assume Catarina would be too.

"What happened to him?" Asmodeus asked softly as he walked closer to Magnus' bedside, the side that Alec wasn't sitting near.

"A variety of things. Stress, poor health, malnutrition, depression, you name it."

"..."

"The tests results found antidepressants and sleeping tablets in Magnus' system, along with alcohol and that combined with the antibiotics made him collapse." Alec watched Asmodeus carefully.

"He was getting help... Magnus said he was." Alec watched the man sit down, confusion in his voice. "George and I had been keeping an eye on him and we found Camille following him into a bar." Alec frowned at that. "That was a week ago and he promised me he was getting help. I even made the appointment for him."

"We assume he has had a bit of a setback."

"He's lost even more weight then I originally thought he had." Alec watched Asmodeus take careful hold of his son's limp hand.

"Magnus is also suffering from a really bad chest infection. It was close to being pneumonia but they've caught it in time. Catarina... I mean Dr Loss did some additional investigating and called Clary and she confirmed that he has been working non-stop too, which mixed with everything going on in his system, made him spiral and his body started shutting down. He's suffering some internal organ damage, but they believe with adequate rest and the correct medications, vitamins and fluids, he will pull through. His hairline fracture to his skull and hip due to his fall will also mend over time."

"I see..."

"What is alarming everyone is the fact he's not waking up." Brown-golden orbs shifted over to Alec but he was continuously staring at Magnus' slack face. "He's not in a coma, but he's not responding to stimulus. Its like he's gone into a deep sleep and we don't know if or when he will awaken."

"What has he done to himself..." Alec heard Asmodeus mumble and felt his frustrations grow, emotions erratic.

"Don't think that you aren't to blame for some of this."

"Excuse me?"

"I know about everything." Alec felt his bright blue eyes not for a single moment flinch from Asmodeus stern gaze. "I know you want to take his children from him."

"Alec..."

"Don't do it." Asmodeus found pleading blue eyes looking over at him. "Can you not see just how devastating that would be for him? Magnus has gone through many hardships and in the end has always come out alone. He lost his mother in the most brutal way possible. His stepfather had doubts Magnus was his own son and when he found out he wasn't, he tossed him aside like he were garbage. He moved from foster homes, nobody wanting him. Do you know how crushing it is, to a little boy, to not be wanted?"

"I am aware that..."

"Taking away his children, it would be the last straw." Alec softly confessed. "Magnus will truly believe he has nothing else to live for. He'll believe himself worthless, just like how those families made him feel when he was a child."

"Alec..."

"Did you even know he was mistreated?"

"I know everything that happened to him." Blue eyes widened at that.

"You know?"

"All of it." Asmodeus reiterated. Alec knew then it just wasn't him or Raphael that knew now. "He never wanted to talk about it. Who was I to try and pressure him to talk. He was just a frightened little boy."

"So how did you find out?"

"By his mannerisms and some of the things he said or reacted to. I was no idiot and there had always been speculation, but an investigation did not happen back then because I didn't want to put Magnus through any of that. He was so scared." Alec gulped down the lump in his throat at the pain he could hear in Asmodeus' voice. "I got my revenge though." Alec was stunned to hear that. "Listen, what has happened between you and Magnus..."

"Is between Magnus and I." Alec voiced through gritted teeth. He did not want some sort of lecture from the man's estranged father!

"Wait, Alec, that is not what..."

"Spare me a lecture on relationships when your own with your son is debatable." Alec's heart hammered in his chest at his scathing words, not even knowing he was going to say them! He watched as Asmodeus' eyes narrowed. Clearly Alec's emotions were frayed as he was letting out his thoughts no matter the cost. "Are you even aware that amongst all the stuff Magnus has been through, one of his most treasured moments is having met you?" Asmodeus remained quiet. "He thought his life was changing for the better, thought everything was going to be alright because he finally had someone who loved him." Whilst Alec's head was trying to tell him to calm, his heart was not listening at all. He needed this man to see Magnus' pain from a different perspective, even if it wasn't any of his business, but from the moment Alec had met Magnus, he'd wanted to side with him, protect him at all costs. "Magnus had never had that before and he was not prepared for how his own father changed, deciding his business was far more important then his own flesh and blood."

"Alec..." He could hear the warning tone but ignored it.

"Magnus understands it now, but didn't back then. He was just a little boy and to him, to his own father, he wasn't needed. Wasn't important enough. Just like he wasn't important enough in the foster homes."

"That is not how I wanted things to be!" Asmodeus Bane was never a man who was easily shaken by anyone's words, but Alec's were clearly affecting him. They had pretty much punched him in the gut, winding him.

"Even so, throughout all you have done to him, the love-hate relationship he has for you, he still feels connected to you. He still has hope. That is how big Magnus' heart truly is. He just doesn't know how to move forward because inside he is still that hurt little boy."

"Magnus and I have..."

"If he truly hated you, he wouldn't remain a Bane and neither would his children." Alec interrupted whatever it was Asmodeus was going to say. "He wouldn't even allow you to see the kids if he truly despised you." Asmodeus was rendered speechless. "Do you know how much he treasures the times you spent together at the lake house?"

"..."

"You've seen the snow globe you gave him." Asmodeus gave a slight nod. He also remembered the star on Magnus' Christmas tree too. Then there was the way he had reacted to when he gave him the camera as well. "Magnus said you had it specifically made for him, so he would always remember the times you spent at the lake house."

"I did."

"Well he does remember them. That snow globe permanently rests on the fireplace mantle, where he sees it everyday. It doesn't just come out because of the holidays. Its there all the time. Magnus is not the greatest with housework, but he always dusts it, always makes sure its perfect, because for a time, back then, he felt like life was perfect because he had you."

"Mr Lightwood..."

"I'm not finished!" Alec snapped through clenched teeth. He didn't want to raise his voice too much, in case his angry vibes could be felt by Magnus in his unconscious state and cause him harm. "You have to hear this whether you like it or not. Magnus has suffered much over the years. Every relationship Magnus has ever been in has been one disaster after another. Camille broke his heart, though I know you are very aware of that. His relationship with Catarina, which resulted in Madzie didn't end well and Dot passed away, not being able to survive through the birth of their sons. He's had some others but they have never stuck around. Just as you suspected, Camille probably had a hand in making them disappear. Another of his relationships, with a man called Woolsey, well he died of a drug overdose. All that pretty much left Magnus thinking there was always something wrong with himself. Plus he was left to raise three children on his own. Even his last workplace was no picnic. He was constantly harassed, bullied and assaulted. That was the final straw for him and he quit. He's been trying to turn his life around, but its one hard struggle after another. Now he's realised his dream of opening Biscuit and Bane with Clary, but life still isn't perfect. Maybe it won't ever be, but Magnus is an amazing man. Faults and all."

"That is not..."

"I know he's also suffered from alcohol abuse, but he's trying his best, for himself and for his kids. Everyone lapses. He's human after all. However, surely you must realise that taking his children away from him, as though that is going to make him do better, will only make things worse for him."

"Mr Lightwood..."

"He will spiral downhill, possibly even back to the bottle and then he won't ever recover. When you threaten to remove his children from his care, you left him with little choice but to seek hired help. I was that help." Alec chewed on his bottom lip, taken aback by his own words as he hadn't meant to let that slip.

"Was?"

"He and I are no longer..." Alec felt tears well in his eyes as he couldn't continue that train of thought and ducked his head. He did not want to appear weak in front of Asmodeus.

"Were the two of you ever really dating, or was it all just a lie?" Asmodeus had not seen this coming at all.

"Not at first." Alec couldn't keep any of this bottled up any longer. He'd never been good at lying. Or more like he'd kept one big secret and that had nearly ruined things beyond repair between him and his siblings. Alec could never do that again. "After that car struck me, when I protected Sweet Pea, during my recuperation is when Magnus asked me to be his boyfriend for real and I said yes. I was so happy he asked me." Alec softly confessed as he nervously clenched his hands in his lap, thumbnail scraping against his palm in nervousness. "Magnus wanted you to believe he was in a relationship, to show you that he can get his act together and be a great father to his children and have a successful profession at something he loves. I went along with it, hating the very thought of his children being taken from him. He loves them so much."

"Alec..."

"Even with all the drama, even with the lying, surely you must know Magnus is a great father. He might be a free spirit, might be a little messed up, but his children are his life. Yes he has struggled, who doesn't, but he's never abandoned them. Even if he hasn't always been there, his children have had someone dear to him close by, whether it be Raphael or Catarina or even you. And of course lately, he had me." Alec raised his blue eyes to Asmodeus. "The kids love him so much and Magnus would move mountains for them. Surely you can see that now that you've been able to interact with him and the kids more?"

"Alec..."

"He just wants to love them. He wants to give them everything he can possibly give them. Protect them with everything he has. Surely as a parent you can understand that?" Asmodeus shifted his gaze to his son before turning his eyes back to the very serious and hardened gaze coming from Alec. "Unless you are here to wish him well and pray for a speedy recovery, instead of interrogating him on trying to mislead you, for obvious reasons of course, please leave. He doesn't need the added stress." Alec let out a frustrated sigh knowing he couldn't place all the blame on the man's father. "I know I'm also to blame for this, because I stupidly gave up and didn't fight for this, for us, and I'll never forgive myself if he doesn't recover." Asmodeus never did respond as he shifted to the end of Magnus' bed to look over his chart, reading the findings that had been investigated already. "I shouldn't have pressured him..."

A groan broke the silence and the tension in the room, Alec immediately leaping from his slouched seated position to check on Magnus. He felt deflated as the man wasn't awake, just groaning in his sleep, perhaps even becoming lost in a nightmare.

"Magnus..." Alec picked up his hand and placed it against his cold cheek as he sat on the edge of the bed. "Please come back." He knew Asmodeus was there, listening in too, but he didn't care about him at all. All that mattered was Magnus. "I promise, I'm not like any of your other relationships. I'm not going to run away anymore. I'm not going to let you do that either." Alec softly promised. "You've shared all of you with me now Magnus. Now let me show you that your past isn't a hindrance to us. Lets move forward, whether we do so as friends or lovers, but we must move forward. I honestly, truly believe, we need each other." Alec took in a deep breath. "You hurt me Magnus. You hurt yourself too. We have to talk about this. We owed it to each other because to me, you're the magic in my life that I can no longer live without." Alec pressed a kiss to the inside of Magnus' limp hand. "I know you're scared, I am too, but I'm sure we can work all this out. I know you feel what I feel Magnus. I know, deep down, you need me too." Asmodeus did nothing but gaze at the man at his sons side and then shifted his gaze to the 'little boy' who once had called him daddy.

If his father had been here, he would have been appalled at him. Magnus probably didn't remember it, but he had met his grandfather a handful of times in those two years when everything was amazing. Asmodeus' father had lapped up being a grandfather to him. He'd fallen for Magnus' cuteness and his cheekiness instantly.

#

(Many years ago...)

'Maggy is my good little boy isn't he?' Asmodeus had listened to his father chorus over and over again as he had glanced into his office to see his giggling boy on his grandfather's shoulders, hands clapping in delight as he'd never been that high before. Asmodeus' father was indeed a tall man, much like himself, and he knew Magnus was going to be the same. 'You'll take care of your daddy for me, won't you Maggy? So he knows that he has someone that loves him by his side?'

'I will Pops. No matter what, I'll always love daddy.'

#

(Back to the present...)

"Come back to me." Asmodeus broke from his past thoughts at Alec's broken request of his son once more. "We need you Magnus... More then you could ever know." Asmodeus watched as Alec leant over and placed his trembling lips against his unresponsive sons. He almost felt like he was now intruding and quietly slipped out of the room, dropping to sit in the chair in the corridor and placed his head in his hands. George was wise enough not to say a thing as he took a seat next to him, offering his silent and strong support. Like he always did.

Asmodeus silently began to pray to any god and angel out there that Magnus would pull through. If not for him, then definitely for his children, for Raphael and most definitely for Alec.

He was no fool, knowing how things had ended between the boys, but even without there being a relationship now, the worry, the care, the love in those blue eyes were firmly directed to his son.

Now all he needed was for Magnus to wake up and see it too. And not run away from it, like he'd clearly done already.

#

Over the next couple of days Alec is pretty much camping in the private hospital room, much like Asmodeus was. Of course they weren't truly allowed to, but Asmodeus had quite the pull over the nurses and specialists and then there was Catarina who was supportive of the two men being by Magnus' side too. His vitals were growing stronger each day and she was convinced it was because they were there. His treating physicians weren't that convinced but knew they would have to pry the two men out of the room, possibly even kicking and screaming, which might cause distress to their patient, and so had let the situation go.

Izzy had returned with a duffel bag with spare clothing and toiletries inside and even his younger brother had come for a quick visit too. Even though they were clearly torn between what had happened between he and Magnus, they did offer their well wishes to Magnus' father who had been sitting on the couch, laptop open as he clacked away doing this, that and the other.

Alec had even called his grandparents to let them know what had happened and they were deeply concerned for Magnus' wellbeing and of course how the children were coping. He thanked them for their support, making sure to pass on the well wishes and promised to keep them informed. He knew they probably wanted to come to New York, since they were still at their farmhouse near Higgens Beach, but Alec declined their offers to visit, hoping he didn't upset them, but he didn't seem to and was thankful for that. Magnus needed a calm environment, not to be overloaded with heaps of people coming in and out of his hospital room.

Just recently, Alec had left for a few hours, his siblings convincing him he needed to at least take a break and get some fresh air. They ate at a coffee shop near their new home in Carroll Gardens and then Alec asked them to help him back up his stuff from Magnus' place. He watched them eye each other, almost seeing their minds tick over, but once again his siblings were wise enough not to comment and they had ended up back at Magnus' place and were cleaning up the apartment and packing up what little belongings Alec had accumulated in his three months there. Max had even cleaned up the broken glass on the balcony and taken out the garbage since it smelt horrible. Izzy went around with a can of air freshener and even got rid of the several days old takeaway in the fridge and placed a deodoriser inside of it to remove the rank smell. She'd even done the dishes and was just wiping down the bench when she could hear Alec's heavy footsteps on the floorboards as he'd finally finished getting his stuff from the spare room and possibly even Magnus' bedroom. Usually he barely made a sound, but she knew he walked with a heavy heart which resulted in his stomping though Alec didn't seem to realise he was actually doing it.

Izzy and Max eyed each other as Alec had his two bags zipped up and resting on the lounge as he gazed about the very place which made him feel more at home then he had ever felt anywhere else. They both watched him shift about the living space, as though taking in everything for the last time, and maybe even remembering everything that had happened in the three months he'd been there.

'You ready to go?' Izzy softly asked, worry clear as day in her brown eyes as Alec was by the fireplace, brushing his hand over the framed image of him and the kids at Christmas. He placed it back down, shifting back to where Izzy and Max were, his black bags in hand and they silently watched him pluck Max's painting from the wall, tucking it under his arm.

'I guess I am.' Alec softly mumbled and gave a slight nod to his younger siblings, they taking the hint that he just needed a moment.

Alec looked around once more, images of the children chatting, laughing, crying and squealing in utter joy. All the times they ate together, played together, it happened right here. In the very kitchen is where Alec had received his first true kiss from Magnus. Here is where he had his first fight with Magnus, where they first made love, where they danced together on the rooftop terrace. Alec felt he lived a life here, going through the ups and downs of a relationship and yet he wouldn't change it for the world. Magnus had made him feel so many wonderful things and every memory consumed him, knowing it was indeed going to take him a long time to ever stop feeling like this and although he wanted to understand Magnus, fight him on breaking up with him, he was also a little weary of just opening up his heart again and forgiving the man so easily too.

There was also the possibility that perhaps things weren't ever going to return to as they once were. Alec may be innocent in all things relationship-wise but he was no fool to realise that as wonderful as things had been, he and Magnus clearly had flaws. Communication and trust were amongst those very things. Like someone as much as you want, but if you didn't communicate properly, you were pretty much dead in the water at not being able to connect and understand each other.

Once Magnus woke, and they were able to talk again, if they could talk again, perhaps there was the high possibility of never being able to return to what they once had, but Alec could hope that even if they could never be romantically involved again, he still wanted to be part of their lives. It would crush him, because even with the flaws they both had, Alec still knew Magnus was going to be the only man he truly would ever love, but if there was a chance of friendship, of starting again, he would take it instantly. Yes his heart might be battered and bruised, but a life without Magnus and the kids, Alec just couldn't see it.

Taking a deep breath, pulling himself from such sombre thoughts, Alec pulled Magnus' key, and his credit card for that matter, from his pockets and silently gazed down at them for a few more moments. He couldn't help himself when he pressed his lips to the key before placing it and the credit card down on the coffee table.

That chapter in his life closed, just like the door behind him and Alec tried to give a convincing smile to his siblings but knew it wasn't working as Izzy took his hand and gently directed him to the elevator, needing to pull him away from the Bane household. Needed to pull him away from Magnus' home which had been so ingrained within him.

When they were downstairs, Izzy and Max waited out on the sidewalk for him, as he went over to shake Alaric's hand, the Head of Security a little perplexed as to what was going on. Alec quickly advised him that he was moving out, needing to spend time with his siblings, and whilst Alaric was sure there was more to it then that, he didn't ask questions and shook Alec's hand, wishing him well.

'I hope to see you again Mr Lightwood.' Alaric remarked, saddened his bosses partner wasn't going to be around anymore. He was always nice, greeting him morning and night, breaking into random conversation every now and then. He'd also seen the change in Magnus and his children since Alec had come onto the scene but knew it was not his place to say anything. Alec had shrugged his shoulders to what Alaric had voiced and with a heavy heart he exited the Brownstone.

He caught a taxi, with his siblings, to their new abode and it was truly a beautiful home. The pictures on Izzy's phone really didn't do it justice. Izzy and Max had pretty much spent the past couple of days packing up their belongings, doing the same for Jace's clothing and random knick knacks he owned as all furniture was staying. They didn't need it. In fact they were all wiping their hands of the apartment which did carry some fond memories for them, but the Lightwood's were more then happy to wash their hands of that chapter in their lives.

Alec had placed his bags in his room, his siblings demanding he take the master bedroom, which he didn't want, but they were not taking no for an answer. It took up the entire fourth floor, massive super king bed, walk in wardrobe which Magnus would have loved and an ensuite which you'd get lost in. There was a massive corner spa bath with a view to die for. Alec could even picture himself lying in it, leaning against Magnus with scented bubble bath filling the marble tiled room. Alec shook his head of such thoughts as he decided to check out the rest of the grand apartment they now called home from today onwards. Above the master bedroom floor was the lovely rooftop terrace with jacuzzi, bar, fire pit, seating and an outdoor kitchen. Alec's room also had a private balcony with a love-seat that he could curl up on and read a good book or two. Granted it'd be even nicer if he could share it with someone but he quickly shook his head of such thoughts again and went to the third floor as Izzy and Max had picked their rooms. Like Izzy had said they each had their own bathrooms and each bedroom was massive, with ample storage which Izzy was super excited about because it meant she could fill the walk-in with even more clothes and shoes.

There was also a third bedroom on the floor, though it didn't have a bathroom but Izzy said that could be a study/office space because they had already picked out a room for Jace. Alec was pulled down to the ground floor to see it was almost like a self contained unit with its own kitchenette, living space, bedroom and bathroom and took up the entire floor. It was still connected to the rest of the property with level one and two being their main living spaces with a massive kitchen area just as his grandmother stated and also had a garden terrace too.

'We thought this could work for Jace, give him a bit of independence, but also still knowing he was part of the family too. Will always be part of the family.'

'It's perfect Iz.' Alec had kissed her atop the head, holding her close and then did the same to Max. 'The sun room off the lounge is perfect for you to paint in.' Alec murmured to Max who nodded his head.

'You can also use it to create your own recipes.' Max offered up to his big brother who hummed his response. 'Do you want to hang out for a bit or head back to the hospital?'

'I really want to get back.' Alec softly voiced, a pink hue in his cheeks. He could feel they had wanted to ask many questions but wisely didn't voice anything once more. All that Izzy had murmured as they farewelled him was that she'd been keeping Jace up to date on what was going on. He gave a nod at that and waved goodbye and made his way back to Mt Sinai.

Arriving back, Asmodeus had just finished a phone call, one that seemed a bit heated. He had to head off to a meeting, Alec giving him a nod and took over with looking after Magnus. The man had still not woken. When Asmodeus left, Alec had pulled out a framed picture of Magnus and his children from within his jacket and placed it on the table beside the bed. He'd taken it from the man's apartment without his siblings watching him like a hawk and knew Magnus would appreciate that he had someone from his penthouse in his rather sterile hospital room.

Alec had even downloaded music that Magnus had listened to in the three months they were living together onto his phone and played it softly in the room as he quietly took hold of Magnus' hand and settled into another long day of waiting.

#

Day four popped around and to everyone's relief, if anyone was up that is, a pair of brown-golden eyes finally drifted open.

It was two in the morning and Magnus had finally opened his eyes. His mind and body felt heavy and he was thoroughly confused and shaken, unsure what was going on or where he was but when something stirred to the right of him, eyes shifting to take a look, his heart constricted instantly.

Alec was hunched in the chair, arms folded like a pillow, head turned to face Magnus but he was asleep. Magnus was sure it was all his imagination, but every time he blinked, his vision cleared more and Alec was indeed still there. He felt tears form in his eyes, instantly remembering how he lashed out at Alec, breaking up with him, breaking their hearts and finally heard soft music which spoke to him immediately...

I remember when we met
Oh it felt so easy then
In a house of clouds we made
Nothing heavy sinking in

Layers unfolding
Scars start showing
There's nowhere to hide it
Waves of emotion
Wild like an ocean
Trying hard to keep it in

I don't wanna take it out
Don't wanna take it out on you, on you
It feels like I'm breaking down
Watching my words cut you in two, in two
'Cause you are
The only one who saves me from myself
When everything is caving
Don't wanna take it out
Take it out on you, on you
But I do

Wish I had a time machine
So I could find some clarity
Give you all the best of me
'Cause that's what you deserve

No satisfaction
Visceral reaction
It's not what I meant to do
Waves of emotion
Wild like an ocean
Carry me into the blue

I don't wanna take it out
Don't wanna take it out on you, on you
It feels like I'm breaking down
Watching my words cut you in two, in two
'Cause you are
The only one who saves me from myself
When everything is caving
Don't wanna take it out
Take it out on you, on you
But I do

I don't wanna take it out
Take it out on you, on you
It feels like I'm breaking down
Watching my words cut you in two, in two
'Cause you are
The only one who saves me from myself
When everything is caving
Don't wanna take it out
Take it out on you, on you
But I do
I do
But I do

"Welcome back." Magnus jerked his gaze to his left to see his father rising from the couch he'd been resting on. Asmodeus can already see the questions forming in his son's eyes.

"You've been asleep for over three days." Asmodeus picked up a cup with ice water in it and placed the straw against his sons parted lips, allowing him to gulp the chilled contents down. "Madzie found you collapsed on the balcony, she ran for help and bumped into Alec and his sister on the street. With your poor health, the chest infection you've had, along with not sleeping, low appetite, your drastic weight loss, stress and depression, the medications you've been taking did not mix well with the alcohol you were drinking and your body reacted badly. Things might be a bit hazy because of the swelling to your head. You've a hairline fracture that will take three months to heal properly." Asmodeus watched Magnus draw his left hand up to his head to feel the bandage, eyes taking note of the drip in his arm. "You are being pumped with fluids and medications and you are hooked up to a heart monitor because the specialists have been worried about your low heart rate. I told them you've been that way since you were a child, but with all the stress your body has been under, the damage you've done to some of your organs, they were worried you may go into cardiac arrest. You've also got a hairline fracture to your right hip, between it and your head, you hit the concrete on the balcony pretty hard. It might be hard to talk at length too because you bit your tongue so its probably still a bit swollen."

"Oh..." Magnus' voice crackled due to not being used. Asmodeus watched his eyes shift to the young man who was still asleep at his right side.

"Alec's been here the whole time." Brown-golden orbs rose to look up at him, as though checking to see if what he said was true and then shifted back to Alec. "We usually do a bit of a shift change, making sure one of us is always with you, but for some reason he didn't want to leave you last night. Maybe he sort of knew you were going to wake up."

"The kids?" Magnus' voice was scratchy and he glanced at the cup of water and Asmodeus instantly poured more into it and held the straw out to Magnus' lips once more.

"Are swapped between George, Catarina and Raphael. They are with Raphael right now. You've had a variety of visitors, just not the kids. Not yet. We wanted you to actually be awake for when they came."

"How are they?" Magnus turned his head away, his notion to say he'd had enough of the cool water now, so Asmodeus place it back down.

"They don't know what is really happening, but what they do know is their Papa is not well and in hospital and at this stage they aren't allowed to see you. That is very scary for them." Asmodeus quietly took a seat by Magnus' side. "What happened Magnus? I thought you were getting help, like we discussed earlier?"

"I was... I just..."

#

(A week ago...)

After Magnus had that rather in-depth chat with Raphael, his brother walking out on him after thrusting Alec's 'gifts' in his hands, along with a business card to seek professional help, Magnus had cried so much he literally didn't think he had anything left in him. He was practically parched, which was bad because Magnus didn't go for water. He wanted...needed...a drink. Badly. He had picked up his wallet, pulled on a jacket and walked to the nearest bar. After all, what was one drink, right?

Of course one drink turned into several. His vision blurred, his body grew numb and as Magnus staggered home, feeling like the pain had subsided, if only for tonight, he was not expecting anyone to be waiting on his doorstep. Especially not this person. For there Camille stood. In all her toxic beauty.

'I must truly be in hell... The she devil is on my doorstep.' Magnus drunkenly murmured, nearly loosing his footing on black ice as he shifted towards the stairs, moving closer to Camille.

'Oh Magnus... Baby, let me look after you.' Her arms were out and for a moment Magnus felt himself drawn to her again. He took a few tentative steps up to her, desperately wanting all the pain to go away, but by some sheer power, as soon as her touch was against his chilled skin, her fingers curling around his neck, it practically burned! It was just enough for Magnus to sober, if only for a few seconds.

'Get the hell away from me!' He staggered on the steps, nearly falling down them. 'You've ruined everything!' He yelled like some crazed lunatic, really wishing Alaric or one of his other security guards, if Alaric wasn't on duty, would come on out and see what was going on. Save him from this mad woman.

It never happened. Magnus was in this alone.

'I'm all you need Magnus.' Magnus' breath hitched in his throat. No one was here to save him. He'd have to save himself!

'No you're not!' Magnus snapped angry in his drunken state, once again nearly slipping on black ice. 'I wanted... I wanted...'

'You wanted what Baby?' Magnus had to break free of this all his own. Raphael was right. Her claws still dug into his battered heart and he would never be free of her if he didn't take action! He may have the support of many, from afar, but no one could do this but him. Camille did not control his life. She was not his life anymore! All he thought about, all that gave him strength, all that gave him life these days was...

'Alexander...'

'What?!' Camille looked enraged. Magnus could make that expression out as clear as day. Even in his inebriated state, though the clarity he felt, of what he truly wanted, truly desired, had him sobering a little at the realisation.

'I'm done with you Camille.'

'I'm the only one you can ever love! I'm the only one who can accept all of you!' Her grip on his wrist was a little painful, once again pulling him closer towards her.

'No...' Her pull ceased at his negativity. She looked almost stunned at his response. 'You're nothing to me.' A slap to his face was her answer. He had received many of those from her over the years. She hadn't just mentally damaged him, but physically assaulted him too and then turned it around on him as though it were all his fault as to why she had raised her hands to him. Such twisted evilness.

'You'll never be rid of me Magnus!'

'I...'

'I told you to stay away from him!' Magnus whirled around at that sudden booming voice, but did so too fast as his world spun, feeling himself tilt and went tumbling down the stairs. He was sure he heard his name being shouted in worry. The man kind of looked and sounded like his father, but Magnus was sure his mind was playing tricks on him, he was drunk after all, and thought nothing more as he slipped into unconsciousness.

#

It wasn't until he woke did Magnus realise that the one who had spoken, near his Brownstone and quite angrily, was indeed his father! He was in and out of consciousness, hearing George talking to his father and the bits he did hear were...

'Do you know where the children are?'

'Raphael has them.'

'Good. They do not need to see their father like this. Take him back to my place.'

'What about her, Mr Bane?'

'Leave her to me.'

When Magnus woke many hours later, he was looking at a ceiling with glow in the dark stars on it. Shifting his eyes around he could see a cork board with pictures still stuck to it. Even old drawings and doodles. It was still hanging above a writing desk and to the right of that was a massive bookcase which still had ribbons and trophies and numerous books. There was even stuffed toys a plenty on shelves. Just as he had placed them when he was a boy.

Magnus finally understood he was lying in his old double bed, in his old bedroom at his father's penthouse! A place he had not been in for two decades!

Time was literally frozen in this bedroom. Nothing was out of place. Everything was as Magnus left it before he disappeared from his father's side.

Magnus could still remember curling up in such a big bed with his father at his side, always asking him to read him the same story every single night if he was home early from the office. It was now a story he read to his own children, though didn't even need to turn the pages of the book to follow the text, for Magnus knew it off by heart. Magnus' gaze shifted back to the ceiling once more, a half smile brushing across his dry lips as George placed them up for him, much to Asmodeus' surprise and his frown.

Poor George he had thought his father had said yes to that, but Magnus being his cheeky self had lied. He got into a little bit of trouble, mainly for the lying part and said sorry to George. Magnus had been scared that day, thinking he was going to be hit, but Asmodeus had just sat him down, told him lying was not nice at all and how he had hurt George in ding so. Magnus had teared up at the thought of hurting George and when he apologised to the man, he was really happy he was cuddled. It turned out to be a good day, because for young Magnus, he still got to keep the stars!

There was also an antique looking globe of the world sitting in the middle of a low height bookcase that ran the length of the window as Magnus, with his big imagination back then, would always tell his father that when he grew up he was going to go on lots of adventures and take his daddy with him so they could take lots of pictures together.

Those adventures, aside from the lake house, never happened.

'You're finally awake.' Magnus jerked his gaze to the door as Asmodeus was there in a pair of jeans and black button down shirt. Magnus couldn't remember the last time he ever saw his father looking so casual before. Perhaps not since the lake house. 'You've been asleep for over a day.'

'What happened?' Magnus' voice was croaky.

'You collapsed in the street after having drunk too much.' Magnus flinched at the words. He'd been doing so well with not drinking as much, but ever since New Years...

'How did you know where I was?'

'George still keeps an eye on you.' Magnus felt his eyebrows furrow as he tried wriggling free of the sheets and comforter as he sat up a little, leaning heavily back into the plush headboard.

'I'm in my thirties, I don't need babysitting.' His head was pounding as he accepted the glass of water and tablets.

'And yet here you are, needing to be looked after.' As much as Magnus wanted to gripe back, he really was a sorry sight and also wasn't in the mood for a fight. He'd had enough of that to last him multiple lifetimes and placed the empty glass down before leaning back into the mountain of pillows behind him and closed his eyes.

'This room hasn't changed much over the years.'

'It has not.'

'Oh god! The kids!' Magnus gasped, eyes snapping open and hands flailing as he was trying to get out of bed.

'They are fine Magnus.' His movements ceased, blinking in slight astonishment as he silently watched his father direct him slowly back under the covers and placed them over his lap. Just like how he used to when he was little. 'Raphael is currently with them. They do not need to see you like this.' Magnus gave a nod, sure he had heard something like that before too. His mind was pretty hazy after all. 'What are you doing to yourself Magnus?' Younger brown-golden orbs shifted over to older ones.

'Falling apart...and rather spectacularly too.'

'Don't be sarcastic.'

'Do I look like I'm lying?' Asmodeus took a seat on the end of the bed. 'I broke up with Alexander.'

'Why?'

'He knows everything about me now. I couldn't live with the disgust in his eyes so it was best we end things before...' Magnus shook his head. 'It doesn't matter. Its over.'

'Magnus...'

'Everything is ruined. She ruined me, ruined my self worth, just like those men did, just like I did, and made me hate myself, hate who I was even more. They damaged me. Camille damaged me. She is toxic. She changed me. I don't even know who I am anymore. Just like last night, for a fraction of a second I nearly fell for her ways once more. That is how fucked up I am.'

'So start placing one foot in front of the other again and move on from her.' Magnus snorted at that.

'Don't you think I've been trying to do just that?'

'No, I think you've been running from your past all this time.' Magnus darted his narrowed gaze to his father. 'Remaining like this will show she has won Magnus. You cannot let her.'

'It is not that easy.'

'I know that, which is why I hope what has happened to her will make it a little easier for you.'

'What do you mean?' Magnus jolted upright in the bed, finally remembering the hazy conversation between George and his father about how he was going to take care of her. 'Camille... She was there last night.'

'I know.'

'What did you do to her?' Asmodeus gave a slight grin. 'Please tell me you didn't kill her.' He was deadly serious about that. As problematic and whirlwind everything had been, Magnus did not like the thought of anyone dying because of him.

'The thought did cross my mind.' Magnus knew his father was not joking when he said that. 'She has toyed with you long enough Magnus. I should have put a stop to it long ago.' The older man let out a sigh. 'I thought I had.'

'What are you talking about?'

'She tried to blackmail me, many years ago, over you.'

'With what?'

'That doesn't matter. What matters is she forgot who she was dealing with and what kind of damage I could do to her and her family in return for messing around with what is mine.' Magnus felt his heartbeat quicken at that.

'Is she still alive?' He softly questioned.

'She is.' Magnus let out a sigh of relief. Asmodeus couldn't help but shake his head. 'Even with everything that she has done to you, the way she broke you, your heart still shows kindness, possibly even forgiveness, for her?'

'I guess...' Magnus gave a tiny shrug. 'I don't know. I'm just an idiot.'

'Not an idiot, just a truly gentle man and an even bigger man then me.' Asmodeus was certain that if Magnus didn't start protecting his rather large, soft and gooey heart, it truly was going to be damaged beyond repair. It was near that thanks to Camille but Asmodeus had believed a certain black haired, blue eyed young man was repairing it, even if Magnus wasn't truly aware of that himself. Now with Alec out of the picture, Asmodeus was even more concerned for Magnus' bruised heart, especially with how Camille has still be hanging around like a bad smell. He couldn't and wouldn't stand for it any longer. 'She will no longer be a problem for you.' Magnus just stared at his father.

'What does that even mean?'

'I made a deal with her father.'

'What kind of deal?' Again, Magnus' heart sped up.

'I'm removing my business dealings from the west coast, letting him get his business out of debt, but in doing so Camille is to never set foot in America ever again.' Magnus arched an eyebrow at that. 'It was mainly why I went to the west coast at Christmas. I had started compiling information about his scandalous daughter and told him if he didn't keep her on a leash, he would know my wrath and so would the press. He'd be ruined forever, as would any future Belcourt generations.'

'You sound so sure about that.'

'She isn't the only one who can go digging up someone's past with photographic evidence.' Magnus gulped down the lump in his throat. Did his father know everything?! 'He said he would keep an eye on her, but of course her showing up at the opening of Biscuit and Bane and seeing her outside the Brownstone a couple nights ago was the last straw. She was at the 54th precinct awaiting bail.'

'What?' Magnus' mouth dropped open.

'Of course she's gone now. I truly would have loved to have seen her face to realise the very man that was posting her bail was her own, very angry and disappointed, father. After I had her locked up, I gave him a call and told him where to find her and then came home to you, to look after you and let George go home to his family for the night.' This was doing Magnus' head in. He was actually finding it hard to keep up.

'Wait, you got Camille arrested?'

'Yes.'

'Camille was arrested...' Magnus murmured to himself, having a hard time comprehending that.

'After your break up, I advised the police that she was stalking your current lover, placing your innocent children in harms way too. They didn't have to know it wasn't a recent break up.'

'You played the police?' Magnus shockingly asked, heart pounding in his ears now. 'They didn't ask you for any evidence or anything?'

'I'm billionaire Asmodeus Bane. I'm a renowned businessman, a prominent figure who happens to be friends with the Chief of Police in this city and who believed my one and only son, the heir to my fortune, was in danger and felt your safety was paramount.'

'I...I'm the heir to your fortune?' Asmodeus was saddened to hear the shock and surprise in his sons voice, though he hadn't meant to let that slip.

'You and the children are my successors Magnus.'

'Even after...after all these years of...of...' Magnus was finding it hard to speak the right words.

'You are my son Magnus, problems and all.' Younger brown-golden orbs lifted up at that. 'Just like I am your father, whether you hate me or not. We are blood.'

'I... I don't...hate you.' No one would ever know just how much those words truly meant to Asmodeus that day.

'I...do not hate you either Magnus. As I said before, you are my son.' Magnus bowed his head, trying to contain his emotions at those softly spoken words. The room went quiet until there was slight pressure against Magnus' knee, under the covers as Asmodeus had placed his hand gently there. 'Do you want to know what has happened to Camille?'

'Yes...'

'Are you ready to hear it?'

'Yes...'

'By having the Chief of Police as a personal friend, Camille's arrest was a fairly simple process. Of course she put on a scene, trying to seduce her way out of being locked up for the night, but as part of all arrests, one is searched to ensure they are not carrying any illegal substances or concealing any weapons. She was subsequently searched by a female officer and it was discovered she carried a concealed knife on her person.' Magnus' mouth dropped open. 'Finding such evidence like that on her person, truly brought to light that my worry about your life and the lives of my grandchildren might be in danger was the nail in the coffin for her that night. She was immediately taken into custody. I advised them that you didn't want to press charges, you just wanted to get on with your new life, with your new partner and children, and advised them that her father was flying in from LA to post bail as Ms Belcourt would no longer be a resident of our fine city.'

'You planted evidence on her!' Magnus' voice rose in volume as he processed all the information currently swirling in his head.

'Her sick obsession of you, which had been going on for far too long, had to be stopped. Her growing fascination in Alec as well, it could not go on.' Magnus licked his dry lips. 'He did not deserve any of that just because he was with you. Nor did you deserve her taunts from afar after all this time too.'

'I never even knew it was going on!' Magnus' voice rose in slight anger.

'I know. That is my fault. I should have told you. We both should have told you what she was up to. Instead, you and Alec ended up...'

'So why didn't you?' Magnus was quick to interrupt his father from voicing more about how he and Alec were no longer together. Yes it was Magnus' doing. In a sense he still believed he had done the right thing, no matter how much it hurt. How much it pained him to break the man's heart and his own. Breaking away from the beautiful man who made him feel so much that Magnus' heart was truly gripped with fear. He had never felt panic like that in his life. Panic and horror that now Alec knew all of him and he couldn't taint him any longer then he already had. Alec needed to be free of him, free of all his disgusting past.

'Magnus...' He jerked out of his thoughts, eyes rising to meet his father's. 'Nothing she truly did at first would be taken seriously by the police. They could just state it was a coincidence that where Alec was, Camille was. Whilst George usually kept an eye on you, there were times, since you were safe and with people close by, especially when at the gallery, whereas Alec was out there, alone, and with the kids.' Magnus' eyes widened. 'He didn't know what was going on at first. I'm sure he even thought all of this would blow over, but he didn't know the history between you and Camille. He had no idea what she was truly like.' Magnus chewed on his lip. 'If there was even a fleeting moment I could catch her, trying to do him harm, threatening him or the children in some way, then I'd have her, I'd have my evidence and I'd be able to start the process of getting rid of her once and for all.' Asmodeus sighed. 'Instead, frustratingly so, she was mostly careful. I had to get creative.'

'Did she... Did she threaten him?'

'I don't know. You would have to ask him.' Asmodeus watched Magnus' eyes shift to his clenched hands which were in his lap. 'I'm assuming she taunted him mentally, trying to get into his head, because I know that is what she is capable of, just as you are aware too.' Magnus nodded his head in agreement. 'I'm assuming, on some level, with how things have ended between the both of you, I guess she did mentally manipulate Alec as she hoped to do.' Magnus let out a shuddering breath. 'What I do know is Alec would never let anything happen to the children. Or you. He always said that to me. I accused him of being with you because of money.'

'You what?'

'I had him investigated and I knew of his financial issues. I thought he was with you to try and get at your fortune, like several of your past lovers were, like Camille was, because you are Asmodeus Bane's son.' Magnus' lips parted, knowing Alec was not that type of man. He would never... He would never! 'I know you never outwardly voiced who your father was, but people did find out Magnus. They wanted to use you to get to your fortune. I have been blackmailed many times.'

'I... Sorry...' Magnus felt so ashamed.

'Just know, Catarina and Dot, were never one of those people.' Magnus didn't need to be told that, but it was nice to hear that two women he had loved in his own ways hadn't tried to hurt him like that. 'Those people, again, forgot who they were dealing with. They got nothing from me and they certainly didn't get an opportunity to throw you under either. I believe some were even set up by Camille.'

'She truly is the devil...' Magnus softly commented, still looking down at his twisted hands in the bedspread.

'When Alec had suddenly appeared in your life, I thought he was just another one after your money, but I was wrong Magnus.' Younger brown-golden orbs rose to look up at Asmodeus. 'He didn't know who I was. I believed him when he told me that. I also believed him when he said he was there for you and the kids. He wanted to keep you and the kids safe, even from the likes of Camille. I wanted to tell him the history between you two, I even started to, but Alec didn't want to hear it from me. He wanted to hear it all from you.'

'Oh...'

'I do know she did confront him in the supermarket one time, and that is when I truly had enough. I got some evidence.' Magnus looked down as a picture was placed in his hands.

'Sweet Pea!' Magnus gasped as there, plain as day was Camille right in front of Madzie. His little girl was clutching a box of chocolates to her chest, a frightened look in her eyes. 'Did she...'

'No. Alec protected her...and the boys.' Magnus' shaky hands took hold of more pictures as he flipped through the rest of them, seeing the confrontation in still images. It made his stomach churn and it wasn't because of his hangover. He could of turned it into a flip book and seen the way Alec got between Camille and the trolley with his precious babies in it, always placing himself in the front, never one to back down from her. Magnus hated the way Camille touched Alec, but he seemed to endure it, if only for the sake of his innocent children. 'When those were developed and George gave them to me, I started making plans to get to LA and discuss with her father what she had been doing in New York. He has copies of these pictures too, along with some more racy images of her in bed with several CEO's of various companies. That is how Camille did business in his name.'

'What did he say to all that?'

'He had no idea she was even in America. She was meant to be in Italy, laying low there as he was cleaning up another of her scandalous affairs. I had the absolute pleasure of presenting him with all this evidence and advised if something wasn't done, police were going to get involved and his business would be the least of his problems as I would make it my life's mission to drag him through the mud just like his own daughter was doing on her own.' Magnus was a loss for words. 'I gave her a chance once before, to never show her face to me ever again, which included seeing you again, but she did not listen. It appears she has been keeping tabs on you and the minute you got a new lover, one that moved in with you, well it appears Camille was not happy about that.'

'Clearly...' Magnus muttered as he handed back the images to his father.

'As I said, she forgot whose son she was messing with.' Magnus chewed on his lip as his hands twisted the bed linen he was lying in once more. 'In any case, after the stint at the gallery, I called him up and gave him 24 hours to get out here. He did not do as I requested and so he got the wonderful call from the Chief of Police that his daughter was currently under arrest and that for her to be released, he had to set the bail in person.'

'He couldn't have been happy about that.' Magnus softly muttered, mainly to himself.

'As if I care. She messed with you for the last time.' Magnus was almost glad he hadn't ever been on the wrong side of his own father. Sure he wasn't that great a son, definitely not a poster child, but everything he had done in his past, it had never tied back to him. He never sullied the Bane name. Magnus had gone by various different names back then after all. His only smart and redeeming quality from back then. 'Whilst you were asleep, Mr Belcourt did fly out here and posted bail for Camille. At my insistence, we played a little game with her and in the end she underwent a variety of medical tests. It was as I always suspected and finally I had my proof as I was with her father when he was given the diagnosis. Camille is a danger to herself, potentially others, but a definite danger to you, the children and any partner you ever involve yourself with, in this case, it was Alec. Therefore, under medical recommendation it was advised she be committed to a mental institute, preferably somewhere far from here, and to remain there for the foreseeable future.' Magnus' mouth dropped open and his eyes widened. 'That is what Mr Belcourt did. All I know is she is somewhere in Finland, where she will never be able to get to you or anyone you associate with ever again.'

'What is wrong with her?'

'Aside from being completely insane?'

'Officially I mean.'

'Does it matter?' Magnus went quiet, almost feeling like his very heart seemed to settle at such news and shook his head.

'I guess not.' Asmodeus watched Magnus' eyebrows furrow. 'Does this mean... Its all over now? She won't ever...show up again?'

'If she were to ever be released, I would be one of the first to know about it.' Magnus had no doubt there. 'So from my point of view, yes, everything with Camille has finally come to an end. She can no longer hurt you in any shape or form.' Asmodeus watched Magnus shut his eyes at that, almost wanting a few moments to have his words sink home.

'I almost feel like I can breathe again.'

'She has been a dark cloud that has loomed over you for far too long Magnus. Its time for you to get yourself right now.' The bedroom went quiet for several long moments.

'Raphael gave me a name of someone to see.'

'Have you made an appointment?'

'No...'

'Would you like me to make one for you? I'll even get you home so you can shower and change and then drop you off. Once you have your first session, I'll take you home, let you rest and then I'll ring Raphael and advise him to bring the children home.'

'You'd do that...for me?'

'Of course.'

'Your work...'

'You are what matters Magnus.' Eyes locked, both filled with pain. 'I know its twenty years too late, but please Magnus... Let me help you now.' Asmodeus was careful in his movements as he reached out his left hand, placing it gently over Magnus' fists hands in his lap. 'Its time Magnus.' Brown-golden orbs rose to look at older ones. 'Its time to admit you need help now.' Magnus dropped his gaze to his fisted hands in his lap, mulling the words over.

'Its time...' He softly agreed with his father, giving him a nod of consent.

#

(Back to the present)

"My therapist wanted me to open up about some stuff, but I couldn't do it. I wasn't ready. Its only been a week but she made me feel trapped. I know I was having an appointment with her every day, sometimes twice a day, but I just..."

"So instead of just telling her you were not ready, you thought ignoring your sessions, working yourself to death, not eating properly, not looking after your chest infection and then mixing your medications with alcohol was the answer?" Asmodeus watched Magnus shrink back into the pillows. Now he probably did feel like a little kid being scolded right now. "I don't want to argue with you Magnus, but surely you must realise how reckless that was." Asmodeus let out a sigh as he placed his hand on Magnus' forearm as he got a nod from his son. "Try and get some rest alright?" He watched his brown-golden orbs shift to Alec who had pretty much passed out due to his own exhaustion. He really hadn't slept much these past few days. "You can touch him, he is real, Magnus."

"What if he disappears?"

"Then you chase after him." Brown-golden eyes shifted over to older and wiser ones. "Although, lets just take one step at a time, alright?" Magnus gave a small nod, eyes closing as he drifted off to sleep.

#

The next morning when Magnus woke, panic set in as Alec was not in the chair at his bedside.

"Relax Magnus, he's gone to shower and he's going to bring the kids for a visit. He was very happy to hear you had woken up when I told him earlier." Asmodeus watched his son visible relax. It hadn't been a dream. Alec was indeed back at his side! "How do you feel?"

"Sore. Tired. Pathetic."

"Magnus..."

"How am I going to face him?"

"You just will. You've more strength in you then you give yourself credit for Magnus. You just need to find it again."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Bane men generally don't go down without a fight."

"Well, I don't know about you, but lately all I've done is run."

"So stop running." Magnus snorted at that.

"How? I'm rather good at it after all."

"There was a point when you didn't run."

"Oh, when was that?"

"When I told you if you didn't clean up your act, I would be taking your children from you." Asmodeus watched Magnus' eyes drift to his clenched hands. "You didn't run away that day. You instead formulated a plan to deceive me with a fake lover."

"You know about that?" Magnus' eyes were wide in shock.

"Alec told me." Magnus gulped down the lump in his throat. "I'm not sure how I feel about you wanting to deceive me, but I understand it too. Our relationship, even after all these years is fractured. We both know this and I certainly haven't made it any better by backing you into a corner, something I should never have done."

"Father..."

"Using your children like that, it was never going to get you to start looking after yourself more. I was able to speak to Raphael too, he confirming Alec's words of how you were at first using him like a fake lover, but things turned serious between the both of you, but of course your past has now fractured the relationship the two of you once had."

"Fractured is putting it mildly. Alec and I are..."

"Broken up, I know, you told me." Magnus gave a nod, stomach churning. 'He told me too.' Magnus chewed on his lip.

"I'm sorry I wanted to deceive you. I didn't know what else to do. I didn't know what I was thinking but I couldn't... My kids are everything to me and I couldn't let you... They are the stability I need in my chaotic life. If you took them away..." Magnus cut himself off, cut his rambling off, when his father's warm touch pressed lightly against his cheek, making him jerk his gaze up to look at him.

"I know Magnus. I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have used the children like that. I shouldn't have made such a threat to you. I am ashamed of my actions." Magnus let out a shuddering breath. "I won't take your babies from you if you wholeheartedly continue with getting help. None of this trying it for a month and then lapsing. Stick to it and stick to it for many years to come." A relieved tear broke from the corner of Magnus' eye, but his father was there to wipe it up. "I'll spend the rest of my life asking for your forgiveness for placing that sort of stress on you, for causing that sort of stress to you, but you have to do better too. If the children are the stability in your life, then you need to become stable too."

"I will. I promise. I won't run away anymore so please...please don't take them from me. They are all I have left."

"Magnus..."

"I can't live without them! Please father! Please don't take them from me!"

"Alright, Magnus. Please take some deep breaths." Asmodeus was worried his son was going into a panic attack, the heart monitor was going a bit erratic. He was quick to pull an oxygen mask over Magnus' face just as a nurse came rushing in. Asmodeus stood back, guilt eating him up inside as she injected a medication into Magnus' drip line and after about twenty minutes things began to calm. She left the room once she was satisfied with Magnus' vitals and Asmodeus moved quietly back to his sons bedside. His warm hand cupped Magnus' cheek as he pulled the mask from his face. "You should keep that on."

"I'm fine now."

"I'm so sorry Magnus." He watched the confusion shift over his sons face. "I truly just wanted you to start living again, start enjoying life and truly smiling again. I wanted you to get that spark back that you lost so many years ago. I know you smiled for the kids, but in here..." Asmodeus placed his hand at his sons heart. "In there you were dead for a long time. Camille killed you." Asmodeus watched Magnus bite his bottom lip. He knew he hated talking bout her and didn't want to do anymore of that, though he hoped, once he returned to his therapy that he would shed everything about her to really clear the air. Asmodeus was sure it would be the only way his son would ever be truly free. "You've had a rough upbringing, from your mother and step-father, to the foster families and even I. We all played a part in hurting you when you should have been treasured and loved. Especially the foster families that hurt you." Asmodeus watched Magnus' eyes flash.

"You know?"

"I do know what happened to you Magnus." Asmodeus started softly, carefully. "I'm sorry we never talked about it. I didn't want to pressure you into telling me. I actually asked you once."

"I remember..." Magnus' barely audible voice broke Asmodeus.

"You were just a little boy, so when you froze, I didn't push any further. I asked Ms Theresa about it, about whether you had been hurt and she said there was speculations but you weren't talking. I thought one day you'd want to talk about it, but then my choices ruined everything between us." Magnus could see the guilt pouring off the man in waves. Twenty odd years had passed and neither of them had really moved on. "If you ever...ever have it in you to forgive me for everything, know that if you ever want to talk about it now, I'm here." Magnus gulped down the lump in his throat when his father grasped his hand. "I'm here Magnus." Raphael's words of second chances circled his head instantly.

"Th-Thank you..." What else could Magnus say?

"I'm truly sorry I wasn't there to protect you." Magnus' heart hammered in his chest.

"You didn't even know I existed back then." He tried to shrug it off, but knew it was not working, not when his own father refused to let go of his right hand with both his own. Magnus truly wasn't sure if he was ready for this conversation either.

"I know I didn't know about you back then, but that doesn't matter... Your my son." Magnus watched the pain in older brown-golden eyes form. "You were my little boy and I couldn't stop them from..." Magnus felt tears in his own eyes.

"I'm alright now. I mean I'm going to be." Magnus finally got his hands back, trying to keep them moving so they weren't shaking as he smoothed out the creases in the hospital linen he was lying in. "My therapist wants me to talk about it, but I just...I froze. I wasn't ready to talk about it. Its been hidden within me for so long that I..."

"Its alright Magnus. You'll get there. I know you will." Magnus raised his gaze to his father's. "As long as you stick to your appointments, you will be able to let it all out and hopefully, one day, live with it all and keep moving forward."

"Maybe... Maybe you could come with me, one day, to a session?"

"Really?" Magnus saw the hope flash in his father's gaze and gave a jerked nod. He hadn't realised he was going to say that, but when the suggestion left his mouth, he knew he meant every word of them. "I'd like that. I think it'd help me too."

"How so?"

"I'm never going to be alright with what they did to you." Asmodeus whispered his confession as he cupped Magnus' face. "They hurt my little boy." Magnus bit on his bottom lip, trying to stop it from trembling. "Truth?"

"Truth." Magnus repeated.

"When I finally knew what they did to you, just by your reactions and the way you spoke, I wanted to kill them."

"Father..."

"As much as I wanted to rip them limb from limb, I'm really just all talk when threatening people with physical pain. All I could do was take them down in court."

"What do you mean by that?"

"I found them Magnus." Asmodeus watched his eyes widened at his words. "All of them. Every single foster family you had been with."

"What... What did you do?"

"I did what I do best. I investigated. I turned family against family and I made them all confess. To put it bluntly, I ripped apart their very lives." Magnus' mouth dropped open. "I know it was a bit selfish of me, but it was almost like a small amount of healing too, because I couldn't protect you back then, but I thought maybe I could protect the next child."

"What does that mean?"

"Thorough investigations occurred for all six families you were placed in. Turns out you were not the only child that had been physically and sexually abused in their care." Magnus let out a shuddering breath at hearing those very words. "I found others. Most were older then you when such things happened to them, but when I came to them, advising them that my own son had been abused at the hands of people that were meant to care for you, like they were meant to care for them, they took a stand and agreed to testify where you could not. I didn't wish to put you through that, and all the damning evidence I found, you needn't have to. As I said, each family is now ripped apart. All the mothers are on probation, which pissed me off because they played the abused wife card, but those men – those animals – they did not get away with anything. They are in jail. They will never be released."

"Oh my..."

"I even took the lawsuit higher, filing damages towards the State for you and the other three boys and one girl I found who were also abused. You were all Wards of the State and they didn't keep you safe as promised. I won a substantial settlement not only for you, but for the others too, not just from the State but also from all six families who caused you and them harm." He watched his sons eyebrows furrow. "I already know what you are thinking Magnus. You would never take their money, because the damage has already been done and no amount could right the wrongs done to you under their care."

"Did the others?"

"Yes. It doesn't make them forget what happened to them, but the girl, she's married with two young children and she has placed it away for their educations and is also mortgage free and has paid off her education debts. She also had to undergo some medical procedures and also has counselling sessions and she's been able to clear those debts too. She's starting up her own charity for neglected and abused children in her state of Illinois. I've offered finances to her."

"What about the boys?"

"Two have been really messed up, but I hope this was liberating for them and it can help turn their fortunes around. They'd been in and out of rehabilitation centres. They'd lost contact with family and friends and never pursued higher education. One has tried to commit suicide and one cuts himself as a coping mechanism. It was almost a miracle I even found them in a halfway house. The only good that came out of it, is they have stayed close friends with each other. As for the other boy, he is actually getting married to his boyfriend in the spring. They are moving to France, a fresh start to their brand new life together as his partner is a professional Pastry Chef and has taken up a job in Paris."

"What did you do with my portion of the settlement?"

"I opened up a shelter to help support abused children in your name." Magnus' mouth literally dropped open. "It offers them safety, food, shelter, education and to talk to fellow children who have been neglected or abused as well as providing them with professional counsellors. I made sure the counsellors were ones that had suffered some form of neglect and abuse in their lifetime and had changed that negativity into something positive and wanted to help the next child." Asmodeus felt his own shoulders ease. He'd been keeping this close to his chest for over a decade now and was finally telling his own son all about it. "I just wanted to give all those things to the next child because you never got it in those two years."

"Why?" Magnus felt his eyes tear up. "Why didn't you ever tell me?"

"How Magnus? You were a scared little boy who didn't want to talk about it and so I let it go. I mean it was always in the back of my mind, but I didn't know the first thing about how to talk to you about it." Asmodeus let out a disappointed sigh in himself. "Even with how tough my upbringing was, I never had anyone place their hands on me and I didn't know the first thing about what you were feeling. When we started getting closer, how you would laugh and smile and tell me that you loved me, I thought it was alright now, that you'd forgotten all about it."

"I couldn't..."

"I know Magnus." Brown-golden orbs lifted up to older and wiser ones. "I was naïve to think you could forget. I don't even know if you ever realised that you lost yourself in your own head every now and then and that is when I knew you weren't ever going to forget, but you were going to have to one day accept it all and live with it." Asmodeus watched his son chew on his lip. "You would have these moments were you would just sit quietly and think about all the bad stuff that had been done to you. I don't even think you knew on several occasions that you cried."

"I did?"

"You did. I wanted to hug you, tell you everything was alright and no one was going to ever hurt you again, but even with those words, I could never take those memories from you. In the end, I didn't know what to do for you, so I would leave you be, allow you that time to yourself, to try and process it all in your head as best you could and then the next day you would turn back into my smiling little boy." Asmodeus took a gulp of water, which technically should have been for Magnus, but his throat was parched. "Suddenly time was passing and my choice to save my company cost me my son. Cost me the chance to ever truly talk to you about all of it. All the abuse you went through and even the choices you made when you ran away from home. I never got to get you any help that you needed, if you wanted it and then time passed and you grew to hate me and then I lost you entirely."

"Father... I don't... I don't hate you." It was nice to hear those words again. "I'm just... I'm not someone that hates. I just become more...guarded...nowadays." Asmodeus knew this too, but it still never stopped Magnus from giving his heart freely. His boy was truly special.

"It really wasn't until Madzie was born did my resolve to do something to make those that took your innocence away, pay for it. So once the lawsuit was all over, the shelters were all I could think about afterwards."

"How many are there?"

"There are three. One on Staten Island, one in New Jersey and one in The Bronx. I didn't want them close to Brooklyn in case you found out about them. I knew those were places you didn't really travel to so..." Asmodeus shrugged his shoulders. "I want to open more because I get to read the success stories on the children that you have helped save."

"I didn't do anything though."

"Your name gives them comfort. Word is spreading to children all around that there is one place they will always be welcome and that is 'Magnus Bane's Safe Haven'. They know they will receive help there. My team works closely with all Government Services and officials and we ensure thorough checks on all foster families are done before a child is placed in their care. We also work closely with the law firm I use and if we find any wrongdoing, we prosecute to ensure each child gets justice as well."

"I... I don't really know what to say."

"Don't ask me to stop." Magnus rose his eyes to meet his father's. "Its what gives me comfort for not being their to help you back then. I should have been a better father." Asmodeus watched Magnus nod his head.

"Can I... Can I go and visit one of them one day?"

"I would be honoured." Asmodeus softly voiced. "I was thinking, maybe if you found anything wrong with it, we can do whatever necessary upgrades is needed and ensure those upgrades spread to the other shelters as well." Magnus gave a tiny nod. "I was also thinking, maybe one day we could go into a business venture together and open up another. Right here in Brooklyn." Magnus' mouth dropped open again. "I currently own a disused warehouse that I think would be perfect for a joint venture between us. If you want that is."

"Really?"

"I'd love to work with you Magnus. The way you carried yourself at your Gallery opening, I was in awe. You were exceptional, even my friend from the New York Times was smitten with you." It all went quiet and Asmodeus wasn't sure what else to say, but felt his son suddenly reach out and grip one of his hands rather tightly. "Magnus? What's wrong?" He felt his own breath catch when teary brown-golden orbs gazed up at him.

"I was so scared." Asmodeus felt like he was looking at his little boy all over again. "They hurt me." Asmodeus let out a shuddering breath, his firm grip holding tight to Magnus'.

"I'm here Magnus."

"It hurt so much. Every. Single. Time." Magnus softly confessed, eyes slipping closed as tears pooled at the corners and some slipped down his cheeks. Asmodeus knew how hard that would have been for his son to admit to, but he had finally admitted to it.

"I'm so sorry Mags..." Magnus jerked a little, not having heard that nickname from his father in so very long. It seemed to have even caught Asmodeus off guard as well, he almost ready to apologise for even calling him that, but Magnus just shook his head, left hand reaching out and Asmodeus silently took it. "If you ever want to talk, or really want me to come to a therapy session with you, or the day you are ready to come and look at one of the shelters, you let me know alright? I'll clear my entire schedule to do anything to help you." Magnus gave a nod, feeling truly touched that his estranged father wanted to do that for him.

"All that I have done and all that has been done to me, how can I move forward from all this?" Magnus rambled mainly to himself.

"A wise man once said: emThere is a saying... Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present/em." Asmodeus watched the play of emotions filter across Magnus' face. A tiny chuckle bubbled up as he brushed the tears away.

"Did you just quote an animated character?"

"The kids watch that movie every time they've stayed with me."

"For you to memorise it... You watch it with them?" There is surprise in Magnus' voice.

"I watched movies with you all the time when we were together, so what makes you think I wouldn't do that for your children, my grandchildren?" Magnus had no response because it was true. He treasured the weekends when he got to spend with his father, cuddled on the couch, eating popcorn or ice cream and watching one movie after the other. Sometime during the whole marathon, Magnus would be lying on the couch, head on his father's thigh and curled under a blanket with his daddy's fingers fluttering through his hair. He never lasted long with such gentle ministrations and would end up nodding off, completely at peace and feeling protected. "Whilst those words are coming from an animated turtle, treasure those words and try and move on Magnus." Tired and drawn golden-brown eyes looked over at his father. "Especially when it comes to Alec."

"Father..." A knock interrupts them and Magnus felt his heart pound away when it so happened to be the very blue eyed beauty his father was referring to.

"Sorry, am I interrupting?" Magnus gulped down the lump in his throat as this was the first time he was seeing Alec in two weeks. He was still so very pretty, but he couldn't say a thing. Not that he knew what to say, or what he should say, and especially with his father there too. What he did notice was the tiny frown on Alec's lips, perhaps he saw his puffy red eyes, which of course instantly made him brush his hands over his face once more, trying to wipe any tear streaks away.

"Not at all." Asmodeus remarked as he stood up from his seated position. "Come on in." He waved Alec to enter the room. After all they'd been sharing the space together for the past few days already.

"I actually have some very excited visitors with me." Alec opened the door wider and Asmodeus felt a tiny smile brush across his lips when three adorable heads popped round Alec's legs.

"Papa!" Madzie, Raphael and Max cried out.

"My darlings..." Magnus' three cherubs rushed inside, Alec quick on their heels as he helped both Raph and Max up onto the bed whilst Asmodeus picked up Madzie and placed her on the bed too. The two men watched the three children pretty much launch themselves into their lightly chuckling father, Magnus flinching a little at how zealous they were, but would take any aches and pains since he got to hug them again. "I'm so sorry I scared you my darlings, especially you Sweet Pea." Magnus mumbled sweet nothings to his children as he kissed them several times.

"Is Papa going to be alright?" Max sniffled, his big dewy eyes welling up with a thousand and one tears.

"It'll take time Maxi, but we've got that together don't we? Lots and lots of time, the four of us?" Asmodeus shifted his gaze to the frown on Alec's lips. He tried very hard to obscure the pain in his eyes as he was not included in Magnus' little speech, but Asmodeus had seen it. He felt sorry for the young man and hoped the two of them could talk about what had happened.

"What about Alec?" Madzie questioned, her big innocent eyes shifting between her beloved Papa and her blue eyed prince.

"And grandpa?" Raphael piped up as well.

"Um..."

"We're here too." Alec gingerly took a step forward, his hand resting on Magnus' blanketed knee, their eyes locking for several moments, it being Magnus who broke the stare which saddened Alec, though he could feel the nervousness coming off the man in waves. "All of us will help your Papa get better, right? Even Uncle Raphy and your Mama too Sweet Pea."

"Yes!" The kids chirped before shifting their gaze to their grandfather.

"Definitely." The older Bane voiced and for a split second it was almost like tears were threatening to fall from Magnus' orbs but he quickly closed them, arms lifting up as he wrapped them nice and tight around his precious children and placed his head back down on the pillows.

"I have missed you." Alec chewed on his bottom lip, assuming Magnus was muttering that to his children and would dare not think or even dream that was a mumbled confession to himself.

"When is Papa coming home?" Madzie softly asked, big eyes pouting up at her father.

"I'm not sure. I've not had a chance to talk to the doctor."

"But Papa is ok now?" Raphael asked, his tiny hand cupping his father's cheek which was covered in stubble.

"Yes Raph."

"Pinky promise?" The youngster placed out his little finger, chewing cutely on his bottom lip which of course reminded Magnus of a certain someone.

"I promise munchkin." He looped his pinky with his son. "Will you lie down with me?"

"Actually," All eyes shifted to Asmodeus. "I was hoping to go get some fresh air and wondered if the three of you would like to come with your grandpa? We could get an ice cream and bring one back for your Papa."

"And Alec too." Max piped up.

"Alec too." Asmodeus confirmed with a nod of his head.

"Papa, we go get you an ice cream." Max voiced as he thrust his arms out to Alec who helped him off the bed, doing the same to Raphael whilst Asmodeus helped Madzie. They headed for the door, both Magnus and Alec silently watching them, the kids halting from walking out as all three turned at the same time to look back at their father in the hospital bed.

"Papa, kisses!" Alec felt a tiny smile tug at his lips as he watched Magnus blow his children kisses. They did the same in return before Asmodeus was shuffling them out of the room, the door clicking closed and a deafening silence enveloped both men.

"He-Hey..." Alec jerked his gaze up from looking down at his twisted hands in his lap, his blue eyes locking with weary and anxious brown-golden orbs.

"Hi,"

"You look..." Magnus' eyes shifted all over Alec, which of course sent a shiver down the man's spine. "You look good." Alec gave a tiny little smile.

"I'm doing...better I guess." He shrugged at that. What else could he say? The room went quiet once more. Alec knew they needed to talk, but they weren't doing a very good job at it.

"I'm such a screw up." Blue eyes darted up at that.

"Magnus..."

"I ruined everything." Their eyes met for the briefest of moments. "Its never going to be as it once was, is it?"

"I'm not sure it should be." Alec gulped down the lump in his throat at how much it hurt him to say that. "You always spoke about communication and yet we were terrible at it about the things that mattered. The only way we really talked is if we argued a bit beforehand or we were backed into a corner and then we would heated blurt out our feelings. You were backed in a corner because I couldn't be patient and wait."

"Alec..."

"I never wanted to do that to you Magnus. I just...I just wanted you to trust me with your past. The way you trusted her with it."

"I should have done better. I should never have compared you to Camille." Magnus couldn't look at Alec right now. "You two are nothing alike."

"Then why?"

"I'm not good at opening my heart up. Camille was the first, besides Raphael, I told all my secrets to. She was the first I willing offered up my past to and instead of trying to understand why I did what I did, or even showing me kindness for the abuse I suffered at the hands of those men and women...she...she laughed at me, belittled me and was disgusted in me."

"Magnus..."

"She threatened to tell the company about my past unless I did as she asked. Even with all that, I was still so twisted, so warped, so...in love with her I didn't think what she was doing was wrong. I was just so happy that someone was staying with me. That someone loved me."

"But she didn't love you." Alec observed Magnus flinch at his words. "Not the way you truly hoped. Or deserved to be loved Magnus. I know I'm no expert, but that wasn't love."

"The way she was, I felt I deserved it for keeping my past hidden from her for so long."

"Everyone has secrets Magnus, but they should never be exploited when they are finally known."

"I know."

"What she did was wrong." Magnus gave a small nod. "She's a horrible person."

"I know that now."

"Have you...seen her since we...parted ways?"

"Yes..." The affirmation was barely above a whisper.

"Oh..." Alec felt a little crushed by that.

"Not by choice." Blue eyes rose. "I...went drinking and when I came home, she was there. On my doorstep. Well...on the stairs of the Brownstone. She tried to win me over. I...nearly fell for it again."

"So what stopped you?"

"Thinking of you." Magnus gave a half smile as Alec's cheeks flushed pink.

"Oh..."

"You saved me."

"You saved yourself Magnus." The room went quiet again. A recurring scene for them.

"I am sorry, for the way things turned out between us."

"Do you regret ending things?" Alec could feel his heart hammering away.

"Of course."

"But you still think it was the right thing to do?"

"I do."

"Without even getting my opinion on anything you told me?" Alec watched Magnus flinch at his words.

"I'm messed up Alec. So very messed up. You shouldn't have to deal with all my shit."

"Shouldn't that have been my choice?" Magnus had no response to that. "You're getting help now, aren't you?"

"I was... I've just...had a bit of a setback, but, I'm going to try again. I promised my father I would."

"So why did you think I wouldn't stick around to support you?" It all went quiet and Alec let out a sigh. "See? We've got issues Magnus. That is why things can never go back to the way they were."

"I understand." The crushing look really messed with Alec's resolve.

"That doesn't mean I'm not worried about you." Brown-golden orbs jerked up. "Maybe we just jumped into this too fast and...and we just need to take some steps back and just focus on one thing at a time. The most important is getting you whatever help you need to get through all of this before revisiting what we had."

"I guess..."

"We'll take it one step at a time Magnus. If you feel like you are going backwards, tell us. Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. You taught me that."

"You are amazing." Alec ducked his head, feeling his cheeks flush.

"Not really."

"I think you are. Always have." It went quiet once more. "Alec?" Their eyes met. "I'm so sorry for what Camille did to you. Manipulating and stalking you the way she did. I'm sorry someone from my past placed you in danger like that. You didn't deserve that at all."

"No one does Magnus." He nodded his head in agreement.

"I promise you, she will not cause you anymore problems."

"How do you know she won't be back?"

"Father took care of it."

"Took care of it?" Alec tilted his head. "Oh god, did he kill her!?" Magnus chuckled, but hissed in pain too. Alec was up on his feet, helping him get comfortable.

"Thanks," Alec gave him a silent nod. "Why would you think my father might kill her?" Alec blushed as he recalled his own rant that evening.

"I...kind of wanted him to. Or more like I asked him why he hadn't." Alec was appalled at himself once he got that out. "Sorry. I know she was someone you loved but..."

"You don't have to apologise to me Alexander." Blue eyes jerked up. It was the first time he'd heard Magnus call him that since he left his phone messages. He had missed the way his name sounded coming from those lips, with that soft tender voice which always made his heart flutter. "Though I must admit, I thought the same thing." Alec let off a tiny awkward chuckle. "It is true though. She won't bother you again."

"Or you?"

"Or me." Magnus confirmed.

"So, that's it then? She's just...gone?" Alec's eyebrows furrowed.

"She has."

"Huh..."

"Something wrong?"

"I don't know... I was just waiting for... I don't know... A big bang or something."

"You want it to be even worse then what already happened?" Alec quickly shook his head now that he thought of it.

"No, anti-climatic is good for me." Magnus laughed tiredly. "You should get some sleep Magnus."

"The kids..."

"Might be a little upset that you fell asleep on them, but they'll be here when you wake up."

"And you?"

"Me what?"

"Will you be here when I wake up?" The vulnerability tugged at Alec's heart.

"Of course." Alec mumbled as he took hold of Magnus' hand as it had been reaching out to him. "I will be here as a friend to help you in your recovery."

"Friend...?"

"A friend." It was painful to say, but there was no way they could jump back into anything with the way things currently were. Even if Alec wanted more answers, more time to take everything in and he wasn't willing to let Magnus go either, he also knew what they both needed was, indeed, time. With Camille now out of the picture, which Alec hoped Magnus would elaborate on one day too, he knew time was now on their hands.

"Alexander..." At the tiny squeeze of his hand, Alec returned it, feeling the tension within him, the worry, ease for a moment now that Magnus was awake, even if he was about to fall asleep on him.

"What is it?" Alec asked quietly back. He didn't want to disrupt the sudden calmness in the room between them.

"I really...really...am so..." Magnus' voice drifted off then, Alec realising that the man was asleep.

"Sweet dreams Magnus." Alec mumbled as he pressed a kiss to the inside of the man's palm and then placed his hand under the blankets, pulling them up to his chin as he brushed a long strand of hair out of Magnus' closed eyes. He truly was a shell of himself, but Alec knew with time and patience, Magnus would place one foot in front of the other and get his life back on track. Truthfully, he had no choice. There were three little cherubs depending on him and Alec was sure the more that was drilled into Magnus, the more he wouldn't just 'try' and get better or seek help. He would get better, period.

Alec sat back down in the chair, not for a single moment breaking his gaze from the defenceless man in the hospital bed.

The kids had been sad that their beloved Papa had fallen asleep on them. Max had asked about the icy pole they had bought for him and Alec said they could share it, so the boys had done that whilst Alec shared his lemonade one with Madzie as she had crawled into his lap, clearly seeking comfort from him as she leaned her tiny body into his, curling up like a kitten.

Once the cold items were consumed both Asmodeus and Alec could tell the kids wanted to curl up with their father, so after carefully manoeuvring Magnus onto his side, onto the hip that wasn't sore, the kids then piled onto the bed, curling into their beloved Papa. In sleep it was like Magnus knew they were there and his arm went protectively around them as his kids cuddled close.

Asmodeus and Alec exchanged looks before settling in for the rest of the day, both watching over four very precious people to them.

#

(Days passed...)

As the days passed, Magnus' strength was slowly returning as he had started to get up and about and also eat a little too. After his sixth day in hospital, with no major health issues, other then needing to put on weight, take care of the chest infection and time to heal both the hairline fractures on his hip and skull, Magnus was finally discharged from hospital much to his utmost relief.

He was also lovingly given a lecture on not mixing his medications and also not taking them with alcohol by Catarina. In fact she wanted him to stop drinking for the next three months at least. Magnus was going to try his best. And truly, it was all she could ask for. The fact he was going to try.

Half way through the lecture is when Alec had been returning from getting a cup of coffee, and also a cup of tea for Magnus, when he overheard the last of the lecture. Magnus not even put up an argument. He smiled as he had glanced into the room when Cat, after she finished her lecture, had engulfed Magnus in a hug, demanding he never scare her like that again. Magnus had apologised and thanked her for being their for the children and also for looking over him too.

The two best friends hugged it out before Catarina had pulled away, her face serious once more as she brushed away a tear from the corner of her eye.

'Why didn't you tell me about you and Alec breaking up?' Alec of course chose that moment to conveniently make his presence known. He didn't want to eavesdrop on that conversation. He had gone about handing over the tea to Magnus and then advised him that his father was going to take him home as he had to go run some errands and just found the two best friends looking at him.

'Something wrong?' He had asked and they both shook their heads.

Alec's errands were in fact his sneaky self heading back to Magnus' as they had a sort of 'welcome home' party going on for him. It was just going to be him, the kids, Asmodeus and Raphael. They didn't think Magnus could handle too many people in his current state, even if he was always the life of the party, but now he just required baby steps. For now. Alec knew Magnus would become that bright, beautiful man oozing with confidence once more.

#

(Outside Magnus' Penthouse)

"You didn't have to assist me to my door." Magnus softly voiced as he placed the key in the lock, the deadbolt clicking as he shifted his gaze to look up at his father.

"I promised Alec I would get you home safe and sound."

"You speak of Alec like... I'm not sure actually. Like he matters to you."

"He does matter." Younger brown-golden orbs jerked up at that, Magnus pausing from opening his front door fully. "He matters, because he mattered to you."

"Its weird you showing such an interest in one of my partners. Ex-partners." Magnus corrected himself. That was a bitter pill to swallow.

"I told you I like him Magnus. He never had a hidden agenda."

"What does that even mean?"

"He didn't care who I was. He just wanted to help you keep the kids safe and with you. That was all that was on his mind at first."

"At first..."

"He might not have said it, but I could see it. His open and honest feelings for you."

"Father..."

"No one has stayed with you like he has. Supported you like he has. Loved you like he has."

"But we never..."

"I saw it Magnus." Asmodeus was almost certain hope flashed in his sons eyes. There was also still pain there too, because Magnus knew how much he had hurt the both of them with his words from three weeks ago. "Words are not needed when I see it in his eyes, in the way he cares for the kids, the way he defends you from everything that might hurt you. The way he tried to protect you from Camille but unfortunately got manipulated by her in the process." Eyes dropped to the ground at his words. "Lets try and not think about all that right now. We just need you to concentrate on getting better alright?"

"Yes..." The two men stood in the hallway for far too long.

"Are you going to let us in?"

"Why do I feel like this is..." Magnus never did get any further as he finally opened the door and loud yelling assaulted his ears. He took in the banner his darling children were holding up which of course said 'Welcome Home Papa'. Another keepsake for his memory box which made him smile. Behind his babies were of course Raphael and Alec, pleased in their own ways at seeing he was home. Asmodeus suddenly found narrowed eyes looking up at him.

"Don't try and put the blame on me, this was all Alec's idea."

"Oh..." A tiny adorable smile fluttered to Magnus' lips as he thought over that for a moment. When it sunk in, he slowly headed over, Asmodeus having placed down his son's bag from his hospital stay and closed the door so as not to let any of the heat out since it was nice and toasty warm in here. It was still winter after all and they still needed to keep an eye on Magnus' chest infection.

Asmodeus watched as the children were hugged, Magnus then giving Raphael a hug and he frowned when Magnus stopped himself from doing the same to Alec. He watched the awkward handshake between them, even knowing that Alec looked like he'd been waiting, almost expecting the hug too, but it looked like his son stopped himself, thinking Alec wouldn't like his touch anymore. Magnus even missed the hurt look that rushed across Alec's face before he masked it, though his son only missed it because his children stole his attention.

That evening Alec had made a feast, though Magnus could only stomach some of the home made chicken and vegetable soup and a slice of bread. He had apologised to Alec, considering the effort he had gone to, but Alec just shook his head, advising him that his adorable little princess and princes would be happy to eat it all over the coming days, which the children had grinned and nodded their heads at.

All three had openly voiced how much they had missed Alec and his cooking, demanding he not go away ever again! An awkward silence filled the room until all jumped at Magnus' phone going off. It was Clary wishing him a 'welcome home' and all parties silently thanked her interruption as everyone went back to eating dinner.

Around 8pm is when Raphael needed to head off and Magnus looked like he was about to fall asleep. Asmodeus was in the process of tucking the children in for the night, reading them their favourite bedtime story in their Papa's absence, promising them that Magnus would read it tomorrow night since he was too tired tonight.

Alec felt like a fish out of water as he sat on the lounge, since Magnus had asked Raphael to help him to his bedroom. That made Alec's heart ache, like Magnus wasn't allowing him entrance to his bedroom anymore because they were no longer together. Just as the dark thoughts were about to consume him, Alec jerked from his thoughts when a hand rested on his shoulder, scaring the life out of him.

"He's asking for you." Raphael softly voiced and Alec shot to his feet, nervous energy coming off him in waves. "You being tense is going to make him tense."

"S-Sorry..."

"Alec, do you think you'll ever be able to forgive Magnus?" Raphael watched him chew on his bottom lip. "I don't mean right this moment. The two of you need to talk, reconnect and all that, but I just meant, maybe one day, in the not too distant future."

"I... I'd like to think I could, but my heart right now..."

"I know. You'll guarding it close." Alec gave a nod.

"My brother's not a bad guy Alec. He's just..."

"Broken. Messed up. I know."

"And now you are too. Broken that is."

"I guess I am."

"Two broken souls can still find each other again."

"Raph..."

"I'm not pushing, just, if there is any hope that you could forgive him down the track, please tell him. It will give Magnus strength to push on. To overcome everything."

"You are sure?"

"Yes."

"Why?" Alec watched Raphael offer a small smile which floored Alec.

"I know my brother. Probably better then he knows himself."

"Ok..."

"Even with what happened between the both of you, thank you for being here for him."

"I wouldn't want to be anywhere else."

"And that is what makes you special." Alec flushed at the compliment.

"Um..."

"I'm out." Raphael headed for the door, giving a silent nod to Asmodeus who was just exiting Madzie's bedroom. "Good night Mr Bane."

"Raphael." The father nodded back as his son's 'brother' placed on his coat and then was gone, the door clicking closed and locking behind him.

"Um, Magnus asked for me so I'm just going to..." Alec gestured with his hand towards Magnus' bedroom behind where Asmodeus was standing. The older man gave a nod, watching Alec stiffly head to the bedroom that he had once shared with his son.

Alec knocked lightly on the door, poking his head in to see Magnus was sitting at the window seat, dressed in his black and gold silk pyjama bottoms and the matching robe which was open. Alec tried with all his might not to stare since Magnus never wore a top. Even with the weight loss, Magnus was still so gorgeous to look at. Alec hoped he wasn't blushing.

"Raph said you wanted to see me?"

"Calling him Raph now?" Magnus teased a little and even if it was at his expense, Alec liked it as he shrugged his shoulders. That was like the old Magnus.

"He didn't object to it so..." Alec calmly, or as calmly as he made out to be, stepped into Magnus bedroom and closed the door behind him. "You know, you should be in bed."

"I've been sleeping a lot as it is."

"Yes, but in a very uncomfortable hospital bed. Now you are back in your own bed, in your own home and should spend this time recuperating without being poked and prodded and annoyed by various nursing staff and specialists. I'm sure it'll make you heal faster too."

"Alright, alright." Magnus didn't want to argue with the stubborn pretty boy and moved towards his bed, a tiny smile reaching his lips as Alec was already there, turning down the bed for him. Magnus crawled into it, sighing blissfully at his plush mattress, pillows and cushions. He had indeed missed it and was sure the softness would ease the ache in his hip too. "Thank you." He softly voiced to Alec who tucked the blankets over him like he were a little kid. It was very endearing.

"I'll let you get some sleep." Alec turned away, but his hand was caught, blue eyes jerking back to look at Magnus.

"Thank you, for being here."

"We're friends Magnus. That's what friends do."

"Friends..." It left a bad taste in Magnus' mouth, but in all seriousness, he shouldn't be picky. He should be thinking how blessed he was that Alec was even here at all!

"Magnus..."

"Thank you for my party. I'm sorry if it didn't look like I was appreciating it, or the food you cooked up."

"I didn't think that." Alec carefully watched Magnus let go of his wrist as his hands began to twist anxiously in his lap. He never did that before. "What's on your mind?" Brown-golden orbs jerked up to look at him. "Its alright, you can tell me."

"I'm sorry I hurt you Alexander. Truly I am."

"I believe you Magnus." Alec's heart clenched when Magnus' hands lifted to his drawn face, brushing stubbornly at his eyes.

"Goodness, what a terrible sight I am."

"That's alright Magnus. You don't have to hide anymore. We aren't going to judge you. I'm not going to judge you. I'm not Camille." Magnus jerked his head into a nod. He was slowly realising that now.

"Do you think I can do it?" Alec tilted his head at that. "Do you think I can move forward from all this?"

"Well, you know what they say..."

"No, what do 'they' say?"

"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present."

"Oh god..."

"Are you alright?"

"My father said the same thing."

"Oh, great minds then?" Alec gave a tiny grin. Magnus snorted. "Max liked the movies and it kind of stuck with me." Alec explained with a shrug of his shoulders.

"My kids love them too."

"Perhaps we could all watch it together one day?"

"I'd like that." Magnus softly replied, hand once again reaching out to him. Without over thinking it, Alec immediately took firm hold of it, enjoying the squeeze Magnus gave him instantly and observed him visibly relax at his strong and firm touch. It was innocent and yet spoke volumes to the both of them.

For Alec, Magnus breaking up with him was the worst feeling in the world, but being here and now, sitting by the man's side, for Alec it was like a gift. Talking to his grandparents gave him strength and the same went for Raphael and Izzy. He couldn't let it end like this. He just knew he and Magnus were meant to be. Call it selfish, call it naïve, call it whatever you want, but Alec was not going down without a fight. He was not ready to let go. He was not ready to let Magnus go.

Though he also knew, even as inexperienced as he was, it was very unwise to just go jumping back into a relationship again. Alec just hoped it wasn't going to be too long. He missed everything that was Magnus, even the imperfect sides of him that he was now starting to see.

"Alexander..." Said man jerked his attention back to Magnus. "What were you thinking about?"

"How glad I am that you're going to be alright." Magnus gave him a tentative smile which, again, tugged at his heartstrings. "You're not alone in this Magnus, but you do need to recover and recover well. The kids need you." Magnus jerked his head into a nod, Alec feeling a smile spread across his lips as he was certain a flash of determination rushed into Magnus' eyes. Perhaps that was what he needed to hear.

"I've made an appointment with the therapist the day after tomorrow."

"That's wonderful news Magnus. Its a step in the right direction."

"It is."

"Did you tell Raph?"

"I did. He told me off for worrying him and then told me how proud he was of me for restarting my therapy sessions. I just need my therapist to not push me. Its only been a week so..."

"That's good. Work with her about setting up some realistic timeframes, but don't be pressured by her. She's meant to help you and forcing you is going to push you away and place you back to square one. I'm not a professional and even I know that."

"I think I got scared because we weren't focusing just on one thing at the time. We were jumping from each bad experience I underwent. I think it all came too much."

"Then take charge Magnus. Tell her for now you want to talk about only one topic right now, whether that be Camille or Dot or even Woolsey. It could just be your drinking habits or even your father." Alec was quick not to include himself in the possible topics of conversation Magnus could have with his therapist. He could assume one day maybe he would be in one of Magnus' therapy sessions though he hoped, prayed even, that if Magnus spoke of him it wasn't going to be painful. Things may have ended for them, but he hoped he gave Magnus wonderful memories, just like what Magnus gave him.

"I will. I promised Raph that too."

"Good." Alec replied instantly. "When he was telling you off, was it in Spanish?" Alec grinned, just taking a guess and hoping to shift away from the current heavy atmosphere enveloping them once more.

"Yes..." Magnus let out a tiny chuckle before he yawned.

"I'll let you get some rest." Alec gasped when something suddenly brushed his ankle, eyes darting down and his lips shifted into a smile as he bent down. "Chairman will keep you company." Alec picked up the kitten, he purring loudly as he head butted him before jumping from his hands to curl up on Magnus' chest. "I think he's missed you."

"I've missed him too." Magnus softly confessed, stroking behind the cats ears. "Missed you as well." Magnus jerked his gaze to Alec's. "Sorry... I didn't mean..."

"Don't worry about it." Magnus let out a relieved sigh, not wanting anything that he said upsetting Alec anymore then what he probably already was feeling towards him, even if he was right here helping him in his recovery. Such a selfless man. Truly an angel in Magnus' eyes. "Thinking of keeping that stubble?" Alec light-heartedly changed the topic again and could see the relief in Magnus' posture because of it.

"No way. Tomorrow morning its coming off."

"Good." Brown-golden orbs rose to look at sparkling blue. "I don't think the kids like it all that much." That earned another tired chuckle and masked the fact Alec didn't like it on Magnus either. It obscured his beautiful face and skin from view, so sue him.

"Alexander... I'm...sorry... I never...never..." Alec's heart leapt into his throat as he quickly squeezed one of Magnus' hands.

"Shhh..." He murmured sweetly to the older man, even if his heart was pounding as Magnus looked like he was going to cry! "Its going to be fine Magnus. Just try and stay positive alright?" Magnus gave him a nod.

"I'm sorry I'm such a mess."

"Hey, no apologies necessary. Just try and get some rest. Tomorrow is a new day. A new beginning."

"A new beginning..." Magnus repeated as Alec nodded his head. "I like the sound of that."

"So do I." Alec stayed by Magnus' side long after the man had fallen asleep.

Three things instantly stood out to Alec as he just sat on the side of the bed, openly looking upon Magnus in the pale lighting.

One: There was a tiny smile on his lips that should always be there.

Two: Their clasped hands. It still felt so right to be connected to Magnus like this, even if his heart still hurt. Alec also instantly realised that Magnus' hand was not ice cold like it had been when he broke up with him. It was lovely and warm and soft. Just as he remembered it was.

Three: Alec was sure there was a soft glow to Magnus' skin, even if he was still drawn looking and exhausted.

It all gave him hope as he once again pressed a kiss to Magnus' palm and then tucked his arm under his sheets and comforter.

"Take care of him Chairman." Alec softly requested of the cat before quietly exiting Magnus' bedroom.

He made his way back into the open plan living space to see Asmodeus was out of his business attire and in a pair of slacks, long sleeved shirt, robe and slippers. Alec was shocked the man could look so casual, but had to remind himself that Asmodeus Bane was human and did have to sleep, even if he didn't look like someone who did. Alec also realised that Magnus' father appeared to be spending the night, but then why wouldn't he when his son, estranged or not, had just gotten out of hospital.

"Coffee?" Asmodeus broke the silence.

"Please." They silently headed into the kitchen, both unsure what to talk about, but they both knew neither of them were about to leave Magnus' side any time soon.

#

As the days continued to pass, turning into weeks since Magnus' collapse, February had appeared almost out of the blue. Magnus' strength and appetite was back, he'd even started returning to Biscuit and Bane though Clary was adorably watching him like a hawk. He knew she sent messages off to Alec, giving him updates on how he was at work, and as cute as it was, Magnus had sort of forgotten to tell his business partner and friend that he and Alec were no longer dating. Though it looked like Alec hadn't told her either.

He was still religiously going to his therapy sessions, much to the pleasure of his father, Raphael and Alec, however one afternoon after a session, he had asked for some of Alec's time and was once again apologising to the blue eyed beauty over everything that had happened between them.

Magnus had sat Alec down that afternoon and told him he was not yet ready to talk about everything just yet. He wanted to, he truly did, but he needed to understand his own demons first, talk about them with his therapist so he could learn to open his heart up, learn to trust once more, which was going to be quite the task for him. For the first time in what felt like a long time, Alec truly smiled as he took hold of Magnus' hand that day.

'Come to me when you're ready Magnus. I'm not going anywhere.'

'R-Really?'

'You won't run me off this time.' Alec watched Magnus bow his head at his words and he immediately wanted to kick himself for saying them. They were very insensitive. 'Hey...' Brown-golden orbs rose to look at him. 'Its alright Magnus. When you're ready to talk to me about everything, without feeling cornered, I'll be ready too.' He could see the relief wash over Magnus. Perhaps this was a big stepping stone in his therapy sessions too. Alec could only assume. 'You've also apologised enough for what happened between us too. I accept your apology alright?' Magnus gave a nod. 'Good.' Alec gave a tiny smile. 'Do you think you can keep it to one a day now?' Magnus gave a chuckle as his head thumped against Alec's shoulder.

'I'll try my best.' Magnus mumbled softly as he took in some deep breaths, remembering Alec's scent and feeling himself ease a little more in his presence.

Alec was truly itching to touch Magnus, embrace him and never let go, but he held back. Painfully so.

'This is our chance to get to know each other again. I'm not coming in with rose tinted glasses now.'

'Alright...'

That small talk seemed to lift a cloud of darkness and awkwardness between the boys and life moved on.

Alec still helped Magnus, even if the doctor's gave him a clean bill of health now. Though that was just who Alec was, helping someone that he cared about. It made Magnus feel special once more. He felt like he was starting to value himself again. Plus it truly got him to appreciate Alec for everything he was worth too.

One day Magnus hoped he could convey that to the precious and selfless man. One day...

For Magnus, it was a little weird at first, seeing Alec coming and going and this time not staying in his home. Or his bed. When he had found out that Alec had moved all his stuff out, that had been a bad day for Magnus, but Raphael was there and telling him to snap out of it because Alec was still here. He might not be his boyfriend, but he was indeed still coming around at least three or four times a week. He always wanted to know how he was going and he also came to cook and play with the kids, providing them with some normalcy as they were taking it hard that Alec didn't live with them anymore. Magnus needed to be the adult. He needed to see that this was a good thing for Alec since the man had told him what his grandparents had done, allowing them to stay in a lovely place and got them out of the unsafe shit-hole they had been in for over a year.

Of course Magnus missed Alec like crazy, but they truly were getting to know each other again. They had started afresh. They were truly friends now. They sometimes even met for coffee, Alec swinging by the gallery, bringing baked treats much to Clary's happiness or they would meet up at the park, kids in toe as they went squealing and running for the play equipment and Alec and Magnus would just sit together, side by side and smiling quietly as they watched on. Some days they would talk non-stop, about many different things and other days chatting just wasn't necessary. That was how close they were now. The anxious feelings, the awkwardness, it seemed to have disappeared as a true friendship was being built on communication, openness and trust. Alec had even let Magnus know that he was starting at I.C.E. in March and the smile on Magnus' face would not disappear that day. He had also started to talk about the foster families he'd been in. That was a big step for Magnus and Alec would quietly listen, never passing judgement on anything. Like he had said before. He was not Camille and Magnus was truly thankful and grateful for that.

#

"I'll see you tomorrow night Magnus."

"What?" The man had been jerked from his thoughts as he was currently standing by his balcony and just looking out over the spectacular view he had. Asmodeus had been stoking the fire, adding another log as it was currently snowing outside. The kids had already been put to bed and that was generally around the time that Alec would head off for the evening.

"I said I'll see you tomorrow night. You and the kids are still coming around for the house warming party right?" Jace was having another overnight stint outside the Sanctuary and Izzy called for a celebration, a non-alcoholic one of course, and said they deserved to have a house warming party too. Alec wasn't so sure, but when Izzy had said he could invite Magnus and his children, which was a big deal for his over protective sister, Alec had agreed. They had also sent out an invite to Raphael, Catarina, Aline, Helen, Lydia, Clary, Livia and Becca. Alec was worried it was going to be too many people, but Izzy said they could spread out since their new home was over five floors now.

"Oh, yes, of course we are." Alec frowned at how distracted the man appeared to be and as he zipped up his hoodie and pulled on the leather jacket Magnus had given him for Christmas, he did go striding over to him, worry evident in his blue eyes.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes of course."

"Magnus..."

"I'm fine Alexander." Magnus gave him a tender smile, plucking the beanie from his fingers and just like he used to, Magnus placed the black beanie on Alec's head. He got an adorable pink hue rushing across Alec's cheeks at his gesture. "I was just thinking about some stuff, but I promise you, I'm fine. Today anyway." Magnus gave Alec a wink at that and it seemed to settle the blue eyed beauty.

"So, you'll be alright to come over?"

"Yes, I believe so. The kids are very excited at seeing your new place."

"Good. I'll see you tomorrow." Magnus was a little stunned when Alec gave him a hug. He hadn't been prepared for it, arms at his sides and he froze a little too. Alec quickly jerked back, giving him that adorable bashful smile, cheeks pink as he rushed for the front door. "Good night Mr Bane." Alec quickly remembered to acknowledge Magnus' father and then he was gone, rushing down the stairs and kicking himself for doing something stupid like that. He didn't want to freak Magnus out and flagged down a taxi, requesting the driver take him back to his new abode and where he could drown out his thoughts by making a mess in the kitchen and thinking about what to cook for tomorrow nights party.

#

"That was a nice gesture from Alec." Asmodeus offered up, watching his son jerk his gaze to him, clearly still stunned by the hug. "Even if it caught him off guard too."

"It was." Magnus softly voiced, still feeling warm and tingly from where Alec had embraced him for less then five seconds. "I hope I get to return the gesture one day."

"You've both been growing closer and closer." Magnus shifted his gaze over to his father once more. "That's promising isn't it?"

"It gives me hope."

"Hope is a good thing." Magnus watched his father turn his eyes back to the mantelpiece, hand raising as he caressed the snow globe he had given him all those years ago.

"You know, you don't have to still stay with me. I'm fine now." Slowly Magnus headed over to the fireplace to stand beside his father.

"I want to be here." Asmodeus quietly voiced and from the corner of his eyes he saw how Magnus furrowed his eyebrows. He was sure Magnus still found the thought of him caring for him shocking, even if Asmodeus had never stopped. "You've taken very good care of this."

"It is a treasured memory."

"I'm glad I was able to give you at least one."

"I have many." Asmodeus shifted his gaze to his son. "Not all my time with you was great, you know this, and I know this, but moments like that, the time we spent together, the fact I finally had someone who loved me for a moment, it is not something I'll ever forget no matter our relationship now."

"I've always loved you Magnus, you're my son. I am just horrible at showing it. I made a choice. A bad choice to save my company, to save the 300 odd staff that I looked after, instead of saving you. I will never forgive myself for that and it is something I can never take back."

"Clearly..." Magnus' inner voice, the voice from his childhood was screaming at him not to do this, not to place up his walls and lose his father again. None of them were perfect. And they both deserved another chance didn't they? Just like Raphael had said. Getting second chances was rare after all.

"I should go. I am clearly invading your privacy." Magnus watched his father place down the snow globe. He felt his stomach churn instantly when he turned away from him. This wasn't supposed to happen. He couldn't afford to have another leave him!

"Please don't go." His voice was barely above a whisper, instantly freezing Asmodeus in his retreat to collect his things from the lounge. "I don't think I can take someone else walking away from me." Magnus felt a hot flush overtake his cheeks. He couldn't believe he'd just blurted that out! He held his breath when his father came to stand before him, his warm hand resting against his shoulder as he shyly lifted his gaze to him.

"Is that really what happened? Between you and Alec? Did he really just walk away from you?" Magnus chewed on his lip, eyes drifting away as he shook his head. He was so angry at himself for everything was his fault. Even though Alec told him to stop apologising, that didn't mean he was forgiven and that tore at Magnus even more. How could he move on, how could he stop apologising without earning some form of forgiveness from the sweet man he had hurt? More importantly though, would he be forgiven?

"I drove him away. I was a fool. I thought I was doing the right thing for him, by letting him go, but... I'm terrible without him. I'm lost without him."

"Is there no chance of reconciliation?"

"I... I don't think there is. I hurt him. I broke his heart."

"I don't think its all as bad as you think." Asmodeus found eyes glaring up at him. "Let me rephrase that. Things are bad, you hurt him and you hurt yourself. You need to own that, accept that, but Magnus, he nearly comes here everyday for you and the kids. Surely there is something in that other then just a sense of duty to help." Magnus' eyebrows furrowed in thought at his father's words. "I know Alec is a caring soul, protective even, but he wouldn't do something like this out of duty. He would do it because he cares."

"Father..."

"Not that I want you to dwell on that too much, since it is quite late and you really should be resting. Please try and get some sleep." Magnus watched his father unfold the blanket on the couch and he fluffed up the pillows too.

"You know, I do have a guest room."

"I am aware, but that very room, for a time, it solely belonged to Alec."

"Well..."

"Granted I'm sure you shared your bed together, but still, that was his place. I do not want to intrude." Asmodeus was intrigued when he found his son blushing softly at his words. Perhaps he was remembering what it was like to have Alec lying in bed with him. Something which hadn't happened for nearly a month now.

"I really screwed up, just like Raph said." Magnus mumbled brokenly, unsure how he felt about himself at acknowledging that to his own father, nor was Magnus prepared for his father slowly moving towards him, arms securing around his tense body.

"Everyone screws up Magnus, that is life, but now you just need to be a man and repair the wrong and heal the hurt." He didn't get a response to that. "We'll figure it out."

"Will we?" His voice was barely above a whisper.

"Yes, together." The room went silent, Asmodeus unsure if he should say something else, but then suddenly, a weight shifted to his shoulder and he took a chance and glanced down to see his grown up boy resting his head there, his tentative hands having moved up to hug him back.

"I'm still so fucked up." This was what Asmodeus needed. This was his chance to finally do right for once in his damn life for his son and held him close for as long as Magnus needed him, feeling his heart ache when Magnus' shoulders shook.

"You need time Magnus. I'm sure Alec will understand that, so have faith in him, alright? You're going to get through this, with all of us helping you along the way when you need it." Asmodeus promised as he held his boy tighter against him.

"Thank you..." Asmodeus closed his eyes, praying for a miracle.

#

(Lightwood House Warming Party)

The party was in full swing, everyone had come and Magnus and his children had turned up about an hour ago. He had come with gifts of food and a present, watching the look of wonder on Alec's face when he sat with his siblings around him and opened up the gift, even as he was sweetly telling Magnus off for even giving them something. Magnus' gift ended up being the cityscape photo from his spare bedroom that Alec loved so much.

'I can't take this.'

'I want you to have it.' Refusal was on the tip of Alec's tongue when Magnus plucked it from his lap, everyone watching as he headed over to the open plan large kitchen/diner they were pretty much all congregating in. 'I think it would look perfect here.' Magnus had placed it up so when Alec was preparing dinner he would always see it and for Magnus he hoped, selfishly, it would make the man think of him.

'Thank you Magnus.' He gave a nod, pleased that Alec looked happy to have something of his in his new home.

'Allie, I'm hungry!' Everyone cracked up, Magnus rolling his eyes at his youngest who clearly only thought about his grumbling tummy.

'Want to help me put the chicken wings in the oven?'

'Yes!' Max piped up.

'Me too!' Came shouts from Raphael and Madzie, detaching themselves from their Uncle and Livia who had been braiding his little girls frizzy hair.

"Sneaking off to be alone I see." Magnus gasped at suddenly having someone sneak up on him, whirling around from where he had been looking out the floor to ceiling windows of what was effectively known as the sun room and came face to face with Isabelle who stood there with hands on hips.

Everyone else were happily chatting away near the kitchen, all eyes watching Alec who was basting the chicken legs and wings with more of the marinade he had made by hand and getting assistance from Magnus' children too. It smelt delicious and it wasn't even cooked yet!

"Isabelle..."

"There are so many things I want to say to you."

"So do it. Whatever you say, I know I deserve it."

"You've stolen the most adorable and loveable man in my life." Magnus felt his mouth drop open. He knew how protective Izzy was of her big brother, but even so, that was not what he was expecting to hear from her. Truthfully he was really expecting to be punched by the young woman.

"Isabelle,"

"You broke his heart Magnus." He gulped down the lump in his throat feeling his heart ache when those very words were indeed true. "I want to hurt you for that." He watched carefully as Izzy shifted her gaze to where Alec and the others were currently chatting and laughing away. His darling children were sticking to Alec like glue, it was very adorable. The man had even said they could sleep over which they were very excited about. Alec had told him earlier that it would given him a little peace too. Though Magnus was very thankful for Alec's offer, he actually would of preferred to be invited to spend the night as well, but knew that was very unlikely. "He won't let me though." Magnus jerked back into the present. "Alec likes the thought of you being in one piece so I'm not allowed to touch you."

"I..."

"I guess, with how happy he's been looking these days, the two of you have patched things up?"

"We aren't back together if that is what you are asking." He watched her eyebrows furrow. "I think we're getting there. I mean we've not really spoken about it just yet, but it has been there, in the background. We are probably both unsure where to from here, being tentative and cautious, me especially, because of how I hurt Alec, and myself, nearly a month back. I'm getting some help and having Alec with me, even though right now we truly are just friends, it is what I need. I think we both know that being without each other is just wrong."

"I'm glad Alec has you back in his life. The time apart and even when you had your health problems, he was not the same. He reverted back to how he was before. Secretive, aloof and sad. He went back into his shell and worried constantly about you when you had your accident."

"Isabelle..."

"As much as I hate to admit this, you bring out the best in him. You allow him to shine as he should."

"He deserves to shine." Magnus sighed adoringly as his gaze too landed on Alec who was currently pulling a face at his darling Sweet Pea who had smeared some of the marinade onto his face and was giggling up a storm. "He makes me whole." Magnus softly confessed. "He makes me want to do better, be better. He makes me a better man and father to my children. I'm definitely not me without him." Magnus shifted his attention back to Izzy. "I've asked him to come to one of my therapy sessions."

"Are you going to be alright?"

"I hope so." Magnus gave off a small chuckle. "I have to be. For my children, for me and for Alec. I want to be someone he can depend on and lean on. I will grow stronger and I will make sure he doesn't regret giving me another chance. Well...if he gives me another chance that is. I haven't really had the courage to ask him yet. I'm hoping to ask him soon though."

"Fine," Isabelle huffed as Magnus tilted his head at her exasperated sigh. "I'll let you have him back." She watched Magnus' confused look turn into absolute delight. "But know this Mr Bane, if you even think about breaking his heart again, I will bury you."

"You have my word Ms Lightwood. On pain of death by those beautiful hands I... oh, I love your nail polish."

"Thanks!" Izzy grinned at the compliment. She'd done them last night and they had taken forever! No one had noticed except Magnus.

Said man quickly shifted back into serious mode, taking hold of Isabelle's hands.

"I promise you. You and your family. Your brother is who I want to be with. I will no longer run from what my heart desires. I have a therapy session on Valentine's Day, if you can believe it, but afterwards I'll be home as Alec has promised to come around and I think my father might be there too, along with the kids, but I want to have a talk with Alexander, tell him what he truly means to me then. I always want him beside me. My time away from him, my hospital stint, my recuperation as he stayed by my side like a mutual friend... Alexander is everything I need. Will always be what I need."

"You do love him."

"I..."

"What are you two talking about?" Both Izzy and Magnus jumped a little and darted their gazes to Alec.

"Nothing." They voiced in unison which got the blue eyed beauty frowning.

"I'm not buying it." Alec's eyes drifted down to his sister holding Magnus' hands. Or was it the other way around?

"Magnus likes my nail polish." Izzy placed up one hand as they were blue with silver glitter in it. "He says they remind him of your lovely eyes."

"Uh huh..." Alec slowly walked off, Jace grabbing his attention as apparently he and Raphael were in a heated discussion over something and needed Alec to mediate whose opinion was better. Alec still eyed them suspiciously every now and then, but he was too far away to hear anything that was being said.

"Isabelle," Her warm brown eyes shifted to look up at him. "I'm sorry for hurting you."

"I'm fine Magnus." She felt her breath hitch when he cupped her face.

"Your my girl though." She chewed on her bottom lip, just like her big brother did, trying to distract herself from getting emotional. "I want to apologise for running the way I did. You trusted me with your brother, with his heart and your own, and I blew it. I will work even harder to earn back your love and trust, alright?" Anything Izzy may have said was lost as she was drawn into Magnus' hug, feeling all warm and cocooned within his protective embrace. It really did remind her of Alec as she squeezed her eyes shut, not wanting to cry. "I promise you dearest Isabelle, I will make it my life's mission to make Alexander the happiest man alive."

"You better." She squeezed back, blinking the tears from her eyes away as she felt a little bit silly, like she was losing a part of her heart as she had to finally share her big brother (and her parent) with the man that he was so clearly in love with and yet stubbornly, at the moment, was refusing to voice it to him.

#

(Rooftop Terrace)

All the appetisers had been eaten, everyone pretty much gorging themselves on delicious chicken legs and wings, potato skins with melted cheese and crispy bacon, cheesy breadsticks and Alec's home made tomato relish which was mouthwateringly delicious. Dinner was going to be a variety of freshly made pizza's by the man himself and Alec wouldn't be Alec without going all out on desserts. He'd done another strawberry mousse, much to Madzie's delight, as well as a lemon meringue pie and an apple pie which would be going straight into the oven after the pizzas were all made. The scent of food in the home gave the Lightwood's new place a wonderful feeling. Magnus had been given the grand tour and was very impressed with the place. He truly could see Alec here.

He knew his kids were still sad that Alec was not living with them anymore, Magnus too was sad, but he understood it too. He had messed up and though Alec had been with him throughout his recovery, this was a great opportunity for Alec to get some stability back. Relationships were hard work, Magnus knew he'd not made it easy and in a sense he had finally come to terms with the fact they had pretty much moved quite fast in their relationship. Now they had the chance to take a step back, rebuild themselves as individuals, drift closer together as dear friends and maybe, one day, come together as partners once more.

"Hey," Magnus jerked from his thoughts, shifting his gaze from the view to look back at the darling man who made him feel so many things. "Izzy said she saw you heading up the stairs about twenty minutes ago. Most of the pizza is ready and everyone has started to eat and I just wanted to check on you." Alec walked over. "You doing alright?"

"I think so."

"We're pretty noisy down there." Alec offered up the obvious as they could even hear the laughter from where they were on the roof as it drifted up through the hallways and stairwells. "Did you need to just get away for a bit?"

"I have been in a pretty controlled environment, but I'm fine Alexander."

"Are you though?" Magnus shifted his gaze back to Alec, observing he was a little nervous.

"Noise is good. I need to get out of my home every now and then. When I've a day off from the gallery and I'm just home alone, its a bit too quiet for me."

"Has your father gone back to his place now?"

"He has."

"How'd you go cohabiting with him?"

"It was...weird. I mean it was nice, but I'm not about to lie in his lap like how I did when I was a kid." That got a tiny smirk from Alec. "But it was nice. Having him there for me. I've not had that in a very long time."

"I'm glad you gave him a chance. He has been watching over you all this time." Alec watched Magnus drift his eyes away. "I can tell he's scared, just like you, and he definitely doesn't know how to show how much he cares, but little things like this, I think its going to help you both. He wants to be a better father to you Magnus. You just need to give him that chance." Alec could instantly feel the shift in the air without much actually happening. It was almost like a warning sign that Magnus did not want to talk anymore on the subject currently being discussed. Alec had gotten so much better at reading him during the rebuild of this friendship they now shared.

"The kids were cute. They were hugging me like they hadn't seen me in days." Alec leaned back against the railing whilst Magnus was leaning forward.

"They still don't understand why you don't live with us anymore. I'm not sure how to explain it to them."

"Magnus..."

"I will though. I'll let them know there is many things you need to do now, but just because you live here, in this very beautiful home by the way, it doesn't mean you won't be part of their lives." Magnus raised his gaze to Alec. "You will be part of their lives...right?"

"Of course." Alec watched Magnus sigh in relief. "I'm part of your life too Magnus." That got a sweet tender smile that made Alec's heart flutter.

"You know, throughout all of this, your parents did do three very good things in life."

"And what's that?"

"You, Isabelle and Maximilian." Alec snorted at that. "Hey, I'm being serious Alexander." Blue eyes flickered to brown-golden orbs. "It is the one thing I will thank your dead parents for, just as I thank my mother. They gave you life, just like she gave me life. We got to meet."

"Magnus..."

"Things aren't quite ideal at the moment, but for now, life is good. We are good."

"We are."

"Its like your grandfather said too. We only get one life. Since our breakup and my recovery, I know I don't want to have a life that doesn't have you in it."

"Magnus..."

"If I only get you as a friend, I will have to live with that. I will be happy and grateful for that as well."

"Magnus, when you look at me, what do you see?" Magnus was a little perplexed with the question.

"Without knowing your past?"

"Yes." Alec watched Magnus' eyes drag up and down his physique.

"I see a man who is regimented, soldier like. You give nothing away and yet you look like you know exactly what you want and will strive to reach that target. You are so strong. So controlled. So determined. Nothing can scare you."

"We all put up masks Magnus, you just saw mine fall faster. I'm not that strong or controlled. Everything scares me."

"Alec..."

"Even with all that, I'm not walking away. Mask or no mask, I am who I am, because you were with me. You helped me discover me. I could fall, be horrible, say terrible things or be cute and soft because I knew you were there. You were the one seeing it all, accepting it all. I knew I could be all those things, and more, because I always felt safe with you. I can be all sides of me with you." Alec took his hand. "I'm not saying its going to be easy. I'm not even saying things will go back to how they were either, but what I can say..." Alec felt a lump lodge in his throat when Magnus took a step or two closer to him, pretty much invading his personal space. Alec didn't mind. It got his heart rate speeding up.

"Tell me..." Magnus softly requested, their hands linked.

"You are safe with me Magnus." Alec watched those brown-golden orbs shimmer with tears. "I'll never intentionally hurt you. Anything you want to say or do or reveal, I will listen to you with an open mind and heart." Alec leaned forward and cupped Magnus' cheek, thumb brushing a tear from the corner of his eye. "I'm here for you, no matter what, alright?"

"Thank you..."

"I need to know one more thing before I decide."

"What?"

"When you said you liked me, Christmas Eve, did you really mean it?"

"Yes." There was no hesitation in Magnus' response.

"Ok..."

"Ok?" Magnus frowned when Alec took a few steps away from him. He felt his heart cry out, but everything stopped when he watched Alec place out his hand.

"Hi, I'm Alec Lightwood. I'm 28 years old and very single at the moment. My parents died ten years ago and I became a parent to my three siblings. We've had a lot of ups and downs and I'm still working on having confidence in myself, but thanks to this really great guy I met, I think I'll get there. He even gets more props because he helped find out that we had some family out there and they are really nice and we've been very fortunate in moving into a really nice neighbourhood and I think things are starting to look up." A warmth enveloped both men when Magnus stretched out his own hand, closing around Alec's.

"I'm Magnus Bane. I'm in my thirties and when I was young, I was abandoned and thrown into foster care. I went through more downs then ups, but out of it all, I've survived. I'm still working through a lot of stuff, but the fact I survived through some really hellish times is what I need to focus on and be proud of too. I'm still here. I beat them." Magnus saw Alec's smile widen at his words. "I've got three beautiful children whom I adore, a brother and his family who I'd be lost without, an estranged father that I think we'll be able to mend our relationship with time, and through all of that, one of the best things to ever happen to me was the fact I met this really cute guy that I'm very fond of. He has the prettiest blue eyes I've ever seen." Magnus liked the pink hue that brushed across Alec's high cheekbones. "I've never really been good at relationships, actually, I'm a walking disaster at them, but I'd really like to give it a go." Magnus watched Alec's grin widen at his words.

Both men suddenly jolted, hands unlinking when soft music drifted through the entertainment speakers on the rooftop terrace...

Can you see me?
I can barely see myself
Are we only
Empty frames up on the shelf?

It's like we're dreaming wide awake
Everything bends until it breaks

Can we recover?
Can we get over this?
Are we too deep in the night to see the day?
Can we recover?
Can we get over this?
Are we too frozen inside to feel the flame?

Empty vapour
Where there used to be our view
Cloudy layers
When the sky was crystal blue

It's like we're dreaming wide awake
Everything bends until it breaks

Can we recover?
Can we get over this?
Are we too deep in the night to see the day?
Can we recover?
Can we get over this?
Are we too frozen inside to feel the flame?

Can we start over?
Say it's not over
Is there a remedy at the place where we started then?
Where there's a hunger within these wounded hearts can mend

Can we recover?
Can we get over this?
Are we too deep in the night to see the day?

"Izzy." Both men mumbled simultaneously, shaking their heads when the song had finally died down, eye sparkling and lips twitching into smiles.

"Its very nice to meet you Magnus." Magnus watched Alec smile at him as he placed his hand out once more. Magnus grasped it immediately, an almost coy smile gracing his lips.

"Same to you Alec."

"Call me Alexander." Magnus' heart soared at that. Not just anyone got to call this man that.

"Alexander..."

"I look forward to getting to know you much better."

"Me too." The two men unclasped their hands, eyes shifting to the opened door and stairs as laughter was once again drifting up from the large kitchen/diner in Alec's new home.

"So, dinner?"

"Sound perfect." Magnus grinned, adoring the shy little smile he got back from Alec.

They had a ways to go, but from this Magnus knew he would do whatever was necessary to get back to where he truly wanted to be. Back inside Alec's heart. He hoped he would get that chance with this very sweet, gentle man. Only time would tell, but this was very promising indeed.

Magnus followed after Alec, their fingers entwining every now and then, making hearts flutter and sing for joy as they rejoined their family and friends.

As frightening as the future could be, along with the unknown, Magnus would be ready for it, because he truly would do anything that would lead him back to Alec.

Valentine's Day was just around the corner. Magnus was going to make it a good one, the best one he'd ever had. He was ready to share his feelings with the one man he truly, honestly, wanted to be with.

Hope burned brighter then it ever had for Magnus as he sat down, right next to Alec, their hands clasping under the table, smiles brighter then ever before.

#

To be continued...