Disclaimer:
Carol Peletier, Sophia Peletier, King Ezekiel, Henry, Jerry, Shiva, and any other recognizable character or plot of The Walking Dead belong to AMC Network and Skybound Entertainment, Image Comics and Robert Kirkman.
In no way is the author claiming ownage of any of the characters nor is there any economic/monetary gain at any time. The author is extremely respectful of the original creators and is willing to take down this work of fiction if requested.
No copyright infringement intended.
Original characters are the property of the author.
Chapter 19: Ice Cream and Fears
"We should celebrate." She feels so out of character as the words pass through her lips but they'd been blurted out before she can stop them.
She is also unable to stop the physical reaction her words bring. She feels her whole body tighten in fear, her step falter. Years of Ed's torture had taught her that her life was to be lived with absolutely no enjoyment. Happiness was fleeting, something to be kept a secret, and usually lasted only a few seconds before a backhanded slap would land on her face. If she was lucky it would end there and she'd nurse her sore face and her tears in silence. When she wasn't so lucky, which was more times than she cares to admit, falling unconscious under his hands wasn't uncommon.
She stiffens in preparation for the blow that her mind thinks is coming. She fights against the reaction as hard as she can, reminding herself that Ed is in jail and Ezekiel would never hurt her. Her divorce is only step one of her regaining her life. Step two is to unlearn everything he'd pummeled into her but it can't happen in a day. She has to work with herself and give herself time to heal.
Ezekiel must have felt the reaction she had because without losing his stride, he raises her hand to his lips and presses a kiss to the back of it. She immediately relaxes, a small smirk tugging at her lips. Suddenly she's not fighting a terrifying reaction but the blush that threatens to creep over her face.
"I believe we should." Ezekiel agrees as he shares a quick look with her. "It isn't every day that one's freedom is attained."
The smirk on her face turns into a full-blown smile despite the tug of pain on her chin. She loses the fight with her emotions and tilts her head down letting her curls shield her face from the rest of the world.
"What should we do to celebrate?" Ezekiel asks as they draw closer to his Cherokee.
"I don't know." She admits. She doesn't have to elaborate, Ezekiel is smart enough to understand what she's gone through and why this moment is so rare.
"Perhaps we should get something sweet." He offers just as they reach the van. He lets go of her hand in order to unlock the car, releasing Sophia's hand at the same time.
"Sweet?" Sophia's interest is instantly spiked. Her daughter has as much of a sweet tooth as she does but has hardly had the chance to indulge in a treat in her short life.
Bending down to pick up her sweet daughter, Carol secures her against her hip as Ezekiel slides the back door open. "Yes, something sweet."
Sophia's face lights up, her eyes glinting with the sunlight, her little lips curling into a smirk that reminds Carol of her own smile. While she may not know how to celebrate, her daughter certainly seems to have an idea already brewing on her little mind. Carol playfully narrows her eyes then leans forward to give her an Eskimo kiss. "Sweet like you."
"Ice cream!" Sophia lets out in an explosion of excitement. It's almost as if her tiny body couldn't keep the idea within her and just had to let it out.
Surprised at Sophia's loud declaration, Carol jumps slightly. She grins at her little girl as Sophia turns to look from her to Ezekiel, then back again, waiting for either of them to accept her proposal. She's vibrating as she waits for an answer.
Ecstatic that her daughter can now express herself anyway she wants without fear of being told to be quiet, Carol gives a nod. "Ice cream sounds delicious, doesn't it?" She asks. Sophia nods right away, her little head bobbing up and down.
Although she's sure that Ezekiel will agree with their sudden need for ice cream, she still turns to look at him over her shoulder before leaning into the car to start the process of securing Sophia in her car seat. "Does that sound good?"
"That sounds absolutely perfect." He declares. "As a matter of fact, I know just the place to have the most delectable scoop of ice cream."
"On a cone?" Sophia stretches in order to catch Ezekiel's eyes over Carol's body, so she leans further down to get out of the way. Once Sophia relaxes, Carol quickly works the buckles of the car seat then steps back once she's done.
Ezekiel glances over to her as if to ask her if a cone is all right. Carol knows she could take a moment to explain that Sophia has never had ice cream on a cone for fear that she'd get it on her clothing. The treat seldom happened back in Georgia, in fact, it was a once in a blue moon event that only occurred when Carol had managed to put away enough for the treat without Ed noticing. Had Sophia smudged her clothes with the sticky treat Ed would have surely found out and Carol would have gotten beat up for it.
"She's never had it on a cone," she finally admits. "But I think today is the perfect day for an ice cream cone."
"Then ice cream on cones we shall have!" Ezekiel declares merrily.
"Yaaaaay!"
It's a miracle Sophia stays in her car seat with all the excitement she has in her tiny being. She silently thanks Ezekiel for having insisted on the best one the store had to offer because she's sure that Sophia would have slipped right out of it with the way she was moving around. By the time they finally park in front of the ice cream shop, Sophia is ready to get out, urging her to hurry.
With her feet firmly planted on the ground, Sophia instantly reaches for her hand. "All ready?" She asks.
Sophia gives an exaggerated nod which makes her hair bounce around but instead of rushing towards the pastel-colored shop, her daughter waits patiently for Ezekiel to reach them. Once he's beside them, Sophia extends her hand for him to take.
"Can I have two scoops?" She asks as they start toward the promised ice cream. "Two big, big scoops?"
"Will you be able to eat two big, big scoops?" Ezekiel questions. He pushes the door to the shop as soon as they reach it, extending his arm so that they can walk through before he does.
"Oh, Mama!" Sophia exclaims as soon as they step inside.
The sound of a bell announcing their presence joins Sophia's melodious voice. Carol can see right away why her daughter is enchanted with the place. With pastel pink walls decorated with illustrations of colorful sprinkles, cherries, and ice cream cones, the place screams of girly dreams. There is even a realistic hand-painted unicorn behind the counter of freezers that contain the tubs of ice cream.
A look at Sophia's expression tells Carol this will soon become a place they will frequently visit. Her baby girl has let go of their hands and is now holding her little hands to her cheeks. Her eyes are wide as saucers as they jump from one painting to the next, finally landing on the unicorn. "It's so pretty!"
Ezekiel laughs and bends down to scoop her up. Sophia squeals in delight and quickly grabs hold of his neck, her legs securing her against his hip. "Ready, Princess?" He asks to which Sophia nods eagerly.
Carol follows them to the freezers. A young woman, probably no older than twenty-five, stands on the other side of the freezers, ready to serve them. In her hand, she holds a tiny plastic spoon which she took from a nearby container. "Hi! Welcome to Unicornio Cream Shoppe, my name is Diane. Which flavor would you like to try?"
Carol turns to the huge tubs of ice cream and has to swallow a gasp. There are so many colorful options that she has to stop herself from gawking. No wonder the woman asked which one they wanted to try out. A quick glance at her daughter makes Carol giggle. Sophia's expression is exactly what she would have done had she been younger; her eyes are wide open in wonder, her little mouth has parted as she stares astonished and leans forward as if the tubs of the delicious treat were about to run away and she has to catch one.
When Sophia notices the young woman staring at her, her daughter suddenly gets a case of the shyness she's known all her life. She quickly curls against Ezekiel, her head resting on his shoulder and her thumb going straight to her mouth.
Knowing she'll have to pull her out of that shy place, Carol reaches over and smooths a hand on her daughters' arm. "There's a lot, aren't there?" She asks softly.
Sophia nods and hums her agreement.
"They are all pretty. Which one would you like to try, my sweet?"
Sophia gives a shrug though her eyes do sweep through the triple rows, dancing from one to the other as she takes everything in.
"They are all made with real fruit," Diane says from behind the freezer counter. "Homemade and hand stirred."
Carol watches carefully as Sophia continues to stare at all the tubs. She notices her daughter's eyes keep coming back to a particular side and quickly follows her gaze to find which one has drawn her attention. "What is that colorful one?"
"This one?" Diane points at the one that Sophia seemed to be drawn to. "That's fruit sherbet! It has orange, boysenberry, strawberry, mango, blueberry, and kiwi. Would the little princess like to try some?"
Sophia lets out a little gasp at the mention of her nickname but nods eagerly. "You can try it and see if you like it, Princess," Ezekiel explains. "If not you can choose something else."
"Otay, daddy." She whispers around her thumb as she eagerly waits for her spoonful of fruit sherbet.
When the woman offers the tiny spoon, Ezekiel reaches for it then transfers it to Sophia who instantly puts it in her mouth. "Is it good, Soph?" Carol asks.
Sophia takes a second to answer before nodding. "Yummy!" She finally says as she pulls out the small spoon.
"You want that one?" When Sophia nods, Carol turns to look at the woman and nods as well. "Let's have that one in a cone."
While Diane scoops the ice cream, Carol turns to her daughter and leans over to kiss her cheek. Sophia giggles and curls further against Ezekiel, escaping her Mama's playful kisses.
"Two scoops, Mama?" Sophia asks, not forgetting the previous conversation they'd had. Carol hadn't thought she would forget but she still narrows her eyes at her as if to judge whether she should have it. "Pweaseeeeeee." Sophia asks while extending her vowel to appear cuter and have a higher chance of getting her way.
"Please, Mama." Ezekiel joins in. He bats his eyes lashes at her which makes her shake her head at them. What a pair they make.
"Fine," She relents. "But you are eating whatever she doesn't finish."
"Yes, my Queen." He promises right away. "What other flavor do you want, Sophia?"
Sophia looks around but ends up shrugging. She's probably overwhelmed with the possibilities laid in front of her and Carol doesn't blame her.
"Do you have any banana flavor?" Carol asks.
"Nana?" Sophia's interest is peaked right away, just like Carol knew it would.
"We do!" Diane closes the freezer then moves away from the side where the fruit sherbet is at until she reaches the other end of the aisle. She opens the freezer and quickly scoops another spoonful of ice cream which she offers to Carol.
Carol quickly does the transfer to Sophia who approves as soon as the creamy substance makes contact with her tongue. "That's a yes."
For a second, Carol loses herself as she watches the woman scoop up the ice cream and transfer it from the ice cream scooper to the cone she's preparing. Once she's finished, Carol watches as she places it on a small stand inside of the freezer before turning to look at her expectantly.
Carol hesitates before quickly shaking her head. "No, I'm fine. Thank you."
Before she's even finished speaking she feels Ezekiel move closer. His warm voice fills her ear as he leans over to whisper to her which makes a rush of electricity pass through her. "Which is your favorite ice cream flavor?"
To be honest, she hasn't had ice cream in a very long while. As a dancer, she had to always watch her figure and weight in fear that she'd be called out by a professor or her dance partner wouldn't be able to lift. Ice cream had also been non-existent when she had been married to Ed. He would never splurge on it and what little she had been able to scurry away had been used in Sophia's once-in-a-while tastes of the treat.
"I don't know. I was always partial to chocolate ice cream when I was young, but that was a long time ago. I don't think I even remember what it tastes like." She admits to him.
"Perhaps this is the appropriate time to recall its taste." Ezekiel presses a kiss to the side of her head then bumps her shoulder to urge her in the direction of the chocolate tubs.
Shyly, almost as shy as Sophia had been, she moves to gaze at the chocolate creaminess in front of her. "We have regular chocolate, double fudge, dark chocolate, and mint chocolate."
"I... I guess I'll try..." She fidgets, not quite knowing which one to pick.
"If I can offer some advice, I'd take the dark chocolate. It's absolutely delicious." Diane seems to take pity on her and offers her a dollop of the dark brown ice cream.
Carol takes it and brings it to her mouth. The cream melts on her tongue instantly pulling a soft moan from her throat. Her eyes slip close as she lets the rich flavor take over her. It tastes much better than she remembers. Much better. Why had she ever thought it was a good idea to stop eating it?
"Make it a double scoop," Ezekiel instructs with a laugh when he sees her reaction.
She opens her eyes and blushes. "One scoop is fine." She says with a shake of her head. She doesn't want Ezekiel to think she is being greedy with the double scoop. "Just one." She tells the girl.
"But... you liked it?" He whispers to her. There's a little bit of hesitation in his voice as if he's trying to understand why she won't go for the second scoop.
"I did, but one scoop is fine. I swear." She insists as she turns her head just enough so that their noses are close together. "I promise. Sophia won't finish hers, I'll just eat what's left of that cone."
Ezekiel nods, though he doesn't quite look convinced. Taking advantage of how close they're standing, Carol leans forward and presses her lips to his quickly before reaching for Sophia so that he can choose his own flavors.
"Kissy." Sophia requests as she puckers her lips so that her mama will give her a kiss. Carol smiled at her and presses a kiss to the tip of her tiny button nose. "Thanks, Mama."
"You are welcome."
"The usual?" The young girl asks Ezekiel who gives her a nod.
"I'm going double scoop though," he quickly adds which prompts the girl to give him a surprised look.
"Really? Two pomegranate scoops?"
"I believe I am partial to a pomegranate and a dark chocolate one, Diane." He declares without missing a beat. "Make chocolate the base and pomegranate the top."
Diane's eyes quickly turn to look towards her before it dawns on her what Ezekiel is doing. She grins and gives him a nod before preparing the double scoop of ice cream.
"Ezekiel," Carol warns as she too realizes what he is doing.
"Yes, my Queen?" He pretends to be completely oblivious but the corner of his lip is already rising and giving him away completely.
"You really don't have to get a second scoop."
"I know." He promises as he wraps an arm around her and guides them towards the toppings that are neatly arranged near a viewing pane. "But I saw how much you enjoyed that tiny bit and I found myself suddenly craving some dark chocolate."
Again she blushes. She really needs to get herself together so that her pale skin doesn't give her emotions away, especially the strong ones she feels for him. This time it's her who hides her face in Sophia's hair, she keeps it there as she feels the heat leave her cheeks and hears her daughter sweetly ask if she can have sprinkles.
"Sure, Princess." Ezekiel gives her the go-ahead. "Do you want chocolate sprinkles or colorful ones?"
Sophia hums to herself as she thinks her answer. In the end, Sophia proves to be her daughter and happily declares "Chocky Sprinkles!"
"Chocolate sprinkles it is."
Before Carol can tell him that she's fine with her cone being plain, Ezekiel has already turned to look at her. "I am aware that you'll insist that just the ice cream is enough." He starts. "But you should get whatever you want as a topping. No matter what it is. Don't think about what Ed would want you to do, or what you'd normally do. Just... focus on what you'd like to try."
"And if I just want plain dark chocolate?" She asks.
"Then plain dark chocolate you shall enjoy."
Knowing that she doesn't have to please anyone, even on something as small as the topping on her ice cream cone, feels liberating. It's enough for her to take a step closer to look down at the toppings and start considering what she wants. There are all kinds of toppings; from salty to sweet and fruits to candy, there is even syrup to drizzle over the creamy dessert.
"Sprinkles, Mama?" Sophia asks as she tilts her head enough to catch her mother's attention.
When Carol turns to look at her, Sophia gives her a beautiful grin that lights up her whole face and shows off her pearly teeth. It melts her heart how her daughter wants to help her. Sophia probably thinks she is too overwhelmed to make a choice and has offered what she thinks is the best option. "Maybe." She replies.
"Chocky sprinkles?"
"I'm thinking more of a fruit," Carol admits as she looks away from her daughter towards the containers of syrupy fruit. "How about cherries?" She asks.
"Cherries?" Sophia asks with a tilt of her head, considering what her mother is saying.
"Yeah. Sounds good, doesn't it? Chocolate and cherries?" She's extremely sure her daughter has never tasted the combination. Maybe she can get her to try it if she manages to pull Sophia away from her fruit sherbet with chocolate sprinkles.
Sophia gives her a nonchalant shrug before entertaining herself with her mother's curls. "I'll have cherries." She tells their server before taking a step back.
She's surprised when Ezekiel doesn't choose a topping. "That's not fair." She notes as they follow him towards the register. "You didn't get any."
"Don't need it." He pulls out his wallet from his back pocket, thumbs through some bills as he's told the total, then hands it over to the girl. "The pomegranate one is perfect the way it is. It goes well with the chocolate without having to add any other flavor." Ezekiel explains.
The ice cream gets handed over and Ezekiel guides them to the table nearest the window. Carol gently places Sophia on one of the chairs then pushes her a little closer to the table. Her daughter barely clears the edge but there are no booster seats that she can see so it will have to do.
"Careful." Carol reminds Sophia as Ezekiel hands over the double scoop cone.
Sophia's eyes are wide open as she holds the cone with both hands, her little tongue snaking out to wet her lips in anticipation. Taking her daughter's distraction to her advantage, Carol quickly unfolds a paper napkin and tugs it against Sophia's collar to somewhat protect her from any dripping and messes. Something tells her that by the end of the treat Sophia will be a sticky mess. Her first reaction is to remind her not to get messy, but she knows that's her ex-husband speaking through her and she refuses to give him a voice any longer. What's the worst that could happen if Sophia does get messy? They'll have to clean her up and wash her clothes, but Ezekiel will not grow mad, will not scream, and will definitively not hurt them. Why not let Sophia simply enjoy herself.
Sophia's first lick of the ice cream is hesitant. She's starting with the banana flavor which is one of her favorite fruits. She's never had it in ice cream though and she's taking her time with it. She licks then savors it before her eyes go wide and she nods to herself.
"Is it as delicious as you thought it would be, Princess?" Ezekiel asks as he gives his own cone a lick.
Sophia nods eagerly before giving another lick then a bite. Biting her ice cream is something Sophia has done ever since she was young. Carol had always thought it was because she wasn't quite sure how to eat it, but now she thinks maybe it's just Sophia's way of eating ice cream. Who is she to correct her on something is trivial as ice cream consumption? The bite is followed by another lick and then another.
By the time Carol has taken her own cone and started licking at it, Sophia already has smudges on her cheeks and the corner of her mouth.
"So good!" Her daughter declares before starting her little food time dance, the dance she does whenever she's eating, and thoroughly enjoying her food. "Yum yum."
"I agree," Carol replies before she licks her chocolate ice cream. "So good."
"I try, Mama?" Without hesitating Carol offers her access to her cone which Sophia promptly licks them bites.
"What do you think, sweet pea?" Carol asks once she sees that Sophia is taking a little longer.
Sophia continues on chewing before swallowing dramatically and giving a nod of approval. "Chocky and cherry are good!" She declares before zeroing in on Ezekiel's dark red ice cream. "Zekeeeeey?" She asks in a sing-song voice.
"Yes, Princess?" Carol can tell that he's pretending to be unaware of what Sophia wants. "What may I help you with?"
"Can I try?" She asks as she rearranges herself so that she's sitting on her legs. The change gives her a little more height and she uses it to her full advantage. "I share." She offers her cone in exchange.
Carol busies herself in eating her own ice cream to stop herself from grinning like a fool at her daughter's antics. She already knows Ezekiel will share with her even if she wasn't offering her own cone in exchange. Still, it's reassuring to know that Sophia isn't growing up to be selfish and that she's ready to shares what she has.
"That's a trade I cannot decline." He extends his arm and tilts his cone so that she can reach it. Just like before, Sophia licks the ice cream but she doesn't bite it. Instead, she opens and closes her mouth as she sucks on her tongue. "What do you say? Is it good?"
Sophia continues sucking on her tongue before giving a little smirk. "Is good. Sweet and sour." She declares.
"That's right. Pomegranates can have a little bit of a tangy or sour flavor."
Sophia bites at her own cone again before remembering that she had offered him a taste. She extends her hand quickly to offer him the treat. Her movement is so swift that Carol is sure the top scoop will fall. Somehow it manages to stay in place and Ezekiel leans forward to take a taste of it.
"Hmmmmm!" He declares in an exaggerated tone. "That is delicious!"
"Uh Uh!" Sophia agrees with him. "And it has sprinkles!"
"It does!"
"Something tells me that getting her in bed today will be a feat. All this sugar is gonna have her bouncing off the walls."
A glint appears in Ezekiel's eyes. It's the kind that tells her that he has something up his sleeve, something his daughter will absolutely love. "I may have something to help with that."
"What?"
Ezekiel shakes his head, not quite ready to tell her. "It's a surprise. Don't worry, she's gonna love it and it will help with Shiva's rehabilitation."
"I trust you." She promises though she is dying to know what he has in mind.
Silence settles between the three of them as they continue with their ice cream. It is only occasionally broken by Sophia's happy humming in between a lick and a bite. When Sophia finally reaches the second scoop, her face is as messy as can be, her hands sticky, but she shows no signs of being done with her treat.
"She might actually finish all of her ice cream."
The realization that her daughter might force herself to finish as to not incur the wrath of the adults' flashes through Carol's mind. Ed had always been about eating every last morsel he paid for, even if it meant that Sophia or Carol had a stomach ache for the rest of the day. Though he doesn't doubt that her daughter is enjoying her treat, she wants to make sure Sophia knows she can leave whatever doesn't fit.
"Soph," she says tenderly. "Remember to eat slowly. You can leave whatever doesn't fit in your tummy anymore."
Sophia stops mid-lick, her eyes wide open. It takes her a second but she finishes her lick and nods. "Otay, Mama."
"I know Ed is in jail and will probably get what he deserves, but it is moments like this when I have the unfathomable urge to rearrange his face," Ezekiel mumbles behind his cone.
"Believe me, I know what you feel," Carol admits to him. She reaches over the table and catches his free hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. "With time Sophia and I will unlearn all he forced on us. You'll just have to be a little bit more patient with her."
"I wouldn't dare push her to do something she doesn't want." His brown eyes quickly cut to her blue. Carol can see he doesn't think that's what she's implying but that he is in turn, giving a promise to her, one she deeply cherishes.
"You've been so patient and kind with us, Ezekiel." She mumbles before finishing the last bit of her cone. "You've made all of this possible, you've helped give us our freedom, helped me have the courage to put him in jail-"
"That wasn't me, my Queen," he interrupts. "You've had it within you this whole time, you just needed a little nudge."
She feels his fingers tighten around hers in an awkward little squeeze so she squeezes back. She would have held his hand for eternity if it weren't for him bitting at the ice cream much like Sophia did. Her daughter laughs beside her, signaling that she had been observing them.
"Mama! You see? You see?" She asks giddily. "He bit it!"
"I saw." It's a simple thing, something so small that a normal person wouldn't even notice it, but it delights Sophia because she had never seen anyone bite into the ice cream the way she does.
"You two are weird." She teases them before reaching for a napkin to clean her daughter's face. She is a sticky mess that will require a wash and not just a quick clean up, but it will have to do for now.
"I weird, Mama," Sophia says with an exaggerated nod. "Zekey weird too!"
"I know and I wouldn't change you in any way. Either of you." She tells her as she leans towards her and tickles her belly then proceeds to kiss her sticky cheek.
Sophia laughs and squirms in her seat. She almost drops her half-eaten cone but Ezekiel manages to swoop it before she does. With sticky fingers, Sophia touches Carol's cheeks before she playfully gives her a rub of the nose with her own. "I love you, Mama."
"And I love you, sweet pea," Carol replies.
"Do you wish for the return of your ice cream, Princess Sophia?" Ezekiel asks while offering back the cone.
Sophia stares at it for a second before shaking her head. She slumps back against the backrest of her chair and taps her belly. "No, thank you. I full, Zekey."
"That's all right," Ezekiel promises with an encouraging smile.
"You finish it? Please?" Sophia asks sweetly.
"Of course!"
"That's going to be a lot of sugar for you," Carol notes teasingly. She can't help but eye the slightly melted scoop of double dark chocolate that he still has in his own cone. Ezekiel had been right, she should have gotten the second scoop after all. "Can't be good for your health. All that chocolate and sprinkles. Too much sugar."
"Am I imagining things or does Mama want my scoop of ice cream, Princess Sophia?"
"Mama wants it," Sophia agrees with him from behind the cover of her sticky fingers.
"Then Mama should get it."
With a triumphant smirk, Carol reaches for the offered cone. She happily gives it a lick or two before noticing that both Ezekiel and Sophia seem to be staring at her. Ezekiel has continued to eat his ice cream though he doesn't look away from her and Sophia, as best as she can, leans into the edge of the table with her head tilted sideways to stare at her mother with a knowing smile.
Carol knows exactly what they want. They want her to bite on the ice cream just like they both had done. "I'm not gonna do it." She warns them. She tries hard to keep a straight face but it's a losing battle. She's sure that with Ezekiel and her daughter she's smiled more than she did in all the years under Ed's tyrant nature.
"I'm not!" She repeats.
Yet even as she says it Carol knows that she's going to give in simply because she knows it will make both of them happy. With a sigh and an exaggerated roll of her eyes, she brings the cone closer to her lips. Sophia wiggles in her seat as excitement courses through her body while Ezekiel halts mid lick to stare.
"The things I do for both of you." She mumbles before she bites into the ice cream.
"Mama is weird too!" Sophia all but jumps out of her chair before rushing around the table towards Ezekiel. She gives him no warning as she starts climbing on to his lap then settles with her body between his and the table. "You saw it? She bit! Like us, Zekey!"
"I saw, Princess," Ezekiel replies with a chuckle.
"It was cool!"
"Whatever you are planning better deal with all her extra energy or we really will have a hard time settling her down for the night. Not even Shiva will be able to keep up with her."
Ezekiel quickly turns to look at his watch and grins just as Sophia has decided to practice her non-existent braiding skills with his dreads. "Actually, if we wish to partake in my plans we should make our way soon."
"Where exactly are we going?"
"To the zoo. We must make a stop before we arrive, though."
"Pick up, Shiva?" Sophia asks as she attaches herself to Ezekiel by wrapping her arms around his neck and her little legs around his waist. Carol has to hand it to Ezekiel as he manages to get up without dropping either Sophia or the cone he holds.
"Yes, But we are going to spend some time at the zoo today."
"Why?" Sophia curiously asks.
"We will be teaching Shiva something today that we cannot teach at home."
Carol follows after them, licking at the chocolate ice cream as she tries to suppress a grin. She knows a second question is soon to come from Sophia. "Teaching what?"
With a degree of patience that Carol is sure not every man has, Ezekiel replies nonchalantly. "How to swim."
Sophia's eyes grow exponentially at the reply. Swimming had been something Sophia had wanted to learn to do despite her young age but Ed had always denied her. Unable to afford a membership at the local pool, much less a swimsuit and floaters, Carol had been unable to make her daughter's dream come true.
"But..." Sophia stammers as her little face grows sad. She unwraps her arms from around Ezekiel's neck and wraps them around herself. She looks far too sad with the pouty lip and the personal hug. It takes a lot for Carol to not reach over and snuggle her child until she can bring out a smile.
"What's wrong, Princess?" Ezekiel asks. The bell on the door rings as he opens the door for them to leave. Seeing that he holds the door open for her before he exits, Carol scurries forward past Sophia and Ezekiel.
"I no swim." Sophia mumbles. Carol doesn't have to turn to look to know that Sophia's eyes are watery. Still, she turns to look over her shoulder to confirm only to find that she is indeed holding back tears.
"You don't?" Ezekiel is somewhat surprised but he makes good in hiding it.
"No." Sophia shakes her head quickly, her hair flying and hitting the sides of her face as she does.
"Ed never let her learn," Carol explains. They've walked the short distance towards the car but neither Carol nor Ezekiel make an attempt to open it just yet. "He always said it was a waste of money. When I told him it could be something useful for her to learn he said it wasn't and that was that."
Ezekiel slowly nods as he understands the sudden rush of tears and change in her daughter's attitude. Instead of chastising Sophia for crying out of the blue, like Ed would have done, he passes his cone to Carol then gently wipes away Sophia's tears with the back of his finger.
"Don't be sad, little Princess." He calmly says in a soothing voice. "This is not something to be ashamed about. I didn't learn to swim until I was five."
"Weally?" Sophia asks. Her daughter has decided to curl herself against Ezekiel, cuddling close to her apparent source of strength.
"Really," Ezekiel promises. He makes a crisscross movement over his heart which Sophia catches right away. "Then today has become even better! You and Shiva shall learn how to swim together. Would you like that?"
The promise of learning how to swim, along with learning how to do so with her beloved tiger, makes Sophia pull away from his chest and give him a watery smile complete with a sharp nod. "Yes!" She exclaims just in case he hadn't gotten it with her silent agreement. "Yes! Yes! Yes!"
"Then say no more! It shall happen! But first, we need to get you a swimsuit, and a vest, just in case!"
"For me?" Sophia turns to look at Carol to make sure that Ezekiel isn't joking and she's really going to get her very own swimsuit and floating vest. Knowing Ezekiel will keep his word, Carol gives her an encouraging smile and a nod of her own.
"Your very own, sweet pea."
"Maybe we can get one for Mama as well, what do you say, Sophia?" He asks the toddler in his arms who enthusiastically claps her response.
"I so don't need a swimsuit," Carol reassures them right away. She knows how to swim, though she doubts they'll go anywhere deep where she would actually be required to float. Getting a swimsuit came with its own set of insecurities that she doesn't want to deal with at the moment. "I can just sit nearby and watch."
"It's gonna be all hands on deck." Ezekiel playfully warns. "Especially with two novice swimmers."
As Ezekiel unlocks the van, Carol reaches to take Sophia who willingly goes to her. She waits until he's opened the sliding door and she has strapped her suddenly very hyped daughter to her car seat, before replying. "Maybe... I could just go in with regular clothes?"
Ezekiel must have sensed her trepidation because his eyes turn from teasing to understanding. "Of course. Regular clothes will be just fine." He assures her.
She's about to move out of the way for him to close the van's door when he stops her. "Wait. You've got some... ice cream right here." His hand transfers one cone to the other hand then gently cups her cheek before this thumb wipes away the chocolate smudges she's left behind in her eagerness to taste that second scoop of dark chocolate. He gives her a smile once he's done cleaning the side of her mouth, then presses a kiss to her forehead.
The tenderness with which he kisses her forehead doesn't go unnoticed. She'll never understand how a man who is obviously physically fit and strong enough to handle tigers on a daily basis, can touch her so lovingly. She melts and the need to kiss him takes over. Not wanting to let the opportunity fade away, Carol leans forward just as he is pulling away from the kiss. Her lips touch his and send a jolt of electricity throughout her whole body. Brazenly, she raises her arms and wraps them around his neck to deepen the kiss. There's a mixture of chocolate, the sweetness of the pomegranate, and the fruits in the ice creams, along with the sweet taste of him that she finds delicious.
When her lungs begin to burn she pulls away. Her face burns bright red as she looks down at her feet. Suddenly shy, Carol tries to find what to say or do. Not wanting anything to be awkward she finally gives a little nod and raises her eyes to his. "You were right," she admits. "That pomegranate ice cream really is delicious."
Ezekiel looks slightly shocked and very bemused at her quip before he leans down and kisses her again, this time softer and shorter. "It is, though I find myself now very partial to that dark chocolate."
Of course she should have expected a reply such as that. She lets out a chuckle before reaching for her cone and giving it a little lick. "Too bad. It's mine now."
With a quick but graceful move, she skirts by him and opens the passenger's door, closing it behind her quickly. Ezekiel rounds the car, his eyes never leaving hers as she continues to lick her cone. It is only when he has closed the door behind him that he turns to look at her with a playful gaze. "My Queen has turned into a temptress."
Temptress. A word she had heard Ed utter hundreds of times whenever he thought she was flirting with a man. A word that was usually followed by a painful pinch in her arm to keep her in place. She had hated that word coming from him, and the ones that usually followed, but not with Ezekiel. Instead of the pain it used to evoke, Carol feels a tiny injection of thrill that she is almost afraid to explore. Maybe it is the way he said it, or the way he is looking at her, or even that smile of his that makes her fall more and more for him. Whatever it is, she likes it coming from him. Temptress.
"Are you mad about it?" She challenges as she watches him finish eating the last of what had been Sophia's cone.
It's Ezekiel's turn to chuckle before he shakes his head, turns on the car, and prepares to drive away. "Never, my Queen, never."
The drive to the store is not a silent one. Urged by Ezekiel, Sophia describes the kind of bathing suit she wants. Carol isn't sure if they'll find a pink suit with white polka dots and a frilly tutu and matching pink vest, but it's fun to hear what Sophia wants.
Hand in hand, with Sophia swinging in the middle of them every couple of steps, they make their way to the store. As they near the automatic sliding doors, Carol can't help but notice their reflection on the glass. They look like a normal family out to buy necessities; a loving couple doting on their daughter and walking at her pace, lifting her every couple of steps and making her giggle as she is lifted. She catches Ezekiel turning to look at her, a smitten look on his face that has her looking away from the glass to face him. Something tugs at her heart when she sees the love shining in his eyes. This is where she and Sophia belong, there is no doubt about it.
She keeps the sudden revelation to herself even though she knows it won't scare Ezekiel. She needs to nurture it further before she can ever bring it up.
Since it's not summertime it takes them a little bit longer to find what's been left from the season. It's obvious right away that there will be no swimsuit that matches Sophia's specifications but it surprisingly doesn't deter her from owing and aweing at all the ones Carol does show her.
It ends up being a draw between a one-piece pink suit with a little golden crown on the center of the chest and a one-piece blue and white polka dot suit. Both of them are draped over the cart's handle, facing Sophia who inspects them carefully as she tries to decide which one she likes.
"Which one do you like most?" Carol says as she watches Sophia trace the golden crown with her pinky finger. "Do you like the crown more?"
"It's Princess," Sophia replies though she doesn't look away from the blue and white one.
"It is," Carol agrees. "Like you."
"Dots?" Sophia looks up at her with a curious expression that Carol recognizes right away.
"I don't think there's one with dots and the crown, Soph." She turns to look at the rack with the rest of the swimsuits and just like she feared, such garment doesn't exist.
Sophia hums to herself in disappointment before looking between the swimsuit again. Carol is about to urge her to make a decision when Ezekiel comes from somewhere behind her, his hand gently pressing on her waist to get her attention.
"I am aware you said you'd be much more comfortable with regular clothes," he starts explaining as soon as he nears her. "And that wish can be honored, but look at this option."
From behind him, he pulls out a modest one-piece black suit. It has thick straps on the shoulders compared to the spaghetti strap she has seen and a slightly higher than usual back. Carol knows that it will cover three-thirds of her back, leaving only her shoulders and upper back exposed. The front also covers up high enough so that it will fall only three fingers beneath her collarbones. Wherever Ezekiel had scooped it up from, he had also found a black swim short to match.
"If you don't like it we can forget I ever brought it to you." Carol can see that he is a little nervous by the way he quickly gives her an out. "We can always find some shorts and a t-shirt. Just thought perhaps you'd be more comfortable in the water with a better fitting garment instead of loose clothing."
Carol could kiss him right there and then for thinking of everything, including her comfort. Deciding she has no reason not to kiss him, she tilts her head back and raises on tiptoes to press a quick kiss to his lips.
"Whatever I did to deserve such a kiss from my Queen, please tell me so I can repeat it as soon as possible."
Carol shakes her head at him, her smile turning into a full grin. "Nothing. You just... you are you." She gives a little shrug before repeating her movements and kissing him again.
She feels Ezekiel's lips curl into a smile as they press against hers. His beard tickles her and she ends up releasing a small giggle before pulling back. She raises a hand to gently caress his beard before shaking her head again, this time at herself. "All right, stop being so charming. You are making me want to kiss you again and then we won't ever leave here."
"I don't see anything wrong with that." Ezekiel's fingers gently caress her free hand before slowly raising it up to his lips.
"Insufferable." She can pretend all she wants but deep down she knows that she is enjoying this far too much. Her newfound freedom has somehow allowed her to reach into a side of her that she hadn't experienced in a very long time. It is a side she thought had died the day that Ed had told her their relationship was based on a bet.
Ezekiel kisses her hand again before turning to Sophia who is absolutely ignoring both of them as she continues to stare at the swimsuits. "Find the one you want, Princess?"
"No daddy," Sophia answers truthfully before letting out an exasperated sigh. "I like the crown." She admits as she points at the first one. Sophia then turns to look at the polka-dotted one. "But... this one too."
Ezekiel looks down at both suits, humming to himself as he scratches his beard. "It's a tough choice."
Sophia slumps forward, her little shoulder's hunching over. "It is."
An idea must have come to Ezekiel because his eyes widen before he takes a step back. "Do not move an inch."
Before Carol or Sophia can say a word, Ezekiel has disappeared to a neighboring rack. "Your daddy is silly."
Sophia wholeheartedly agrees and lets her know by nodding her head. As she does, one of her pigtails flops more than the other, the little elastic almost half off. Instantly, Sophia reaches for it, ready to pull at the elastic to release her hair. Carol beats her to it. "Let me fix that, sweat pea."
"Otay, Mama." Sophia goes back to trying to choose between the swimsuits, the hardest choice of her whole small life.
No sooner has Carol finished fixing her daughter's pigtail that Ezekiel has popped back, a white vest in his hand. "I wasn't able to procure a vest with crowns but I found this." He instantly turns the white vest over to reveal that the vest has the word 'Princess' etched on its back in bright pink letters.
The reaction is instant. Sophia's little eyes grow wide open, her little mouth dropping into an 'o' shape as she looks at the vest. Carol is sure Sophia has no idea what the word says because she doesn't know how to read but the color certainly catches her attention far more than the crown does.
"Do you know what it says there, Soph?" Carol asks her with a grin. Sophia nods right away then stops to shake her head. "It says 'Princess'."
"I'm a Princess!" Sophia reminds them.
"Then I am glad I found it! That way our Princess can have the beautiful polka dotted one under the vest and the world will still know she's a Princess."
"Do you like that Sophia? The blue swimsuit and the princess vest?"
Swinging her feet, Sophia quickly nods at them before pushing the pink swimsuit away.
With that decision under their belt, Ezekiel guides them to one of the many registers and quickly pays. Carol can't help but catch a glimpse of the total before making a mental note of it, adding it to the tally she has kept of all she wants to pay back. She has no doubt that he will deny her and insist she doesn't have to pay him back, but she will, somehow.
With their purchase in the back of the van and the rest of the family strapped in, they ride towards the zoo. It takes them a little longer to reach the worker's gate than usual, having had a bigger distance to cover, though it does nothing to quench her daughter's excitement. As soon as Carol has let her out of her constraints, Sophia reaches for her stuffed tiger and confidently jumps out of the van.
"Hurry Mama!" She beckons Carol with a wave before she grabs hold of Ezekiel's hand and pulls. "Daddy! Hurry! Shiva misses us!"
With Sophia setting the pace they quickly reach the tiger enclosure. Her daughter dances with excitement as Ezekiel opens the door then she dashes inside towards where she knows she'll find Shiva. A ball of fear quickly jumps in Carol's throat as she watches her little one move away far too quickly for her to catch, completely unaware of the danger she could have just walked into.
Like a bolt of lightning, Carol lunges forward to try and catch her. "Soph! Wait!" She's not fast enough, her fingers barely brushing her daughter's clothes as Sophia rushes in front of her. "Sophia!"
Soph doesn't get very far before she stops dead in her tracks at her mother's scream. She hugs her tiger to her chest and slowly turns to look back at them. As Carol nears her she can see an expression of worry and realization in her daughter's hazel eyes. She knows she's skipped an important part of the process and has worried her Mama enough to raise her voice.
"Sorry, Mama." She mumbles against the head of her tiger where she buries most of her face. Only her eyes remain uncovered as she looks between her mom and an approaching Ezekiel. "I forgot."
Sophia knows the rules, of that Carol is sure, and she knows that before they can go get Shiva, Ezekiel needs to make sure that it's safe for both of them to there. Animals could be unpredictable and if one of them was being treated it could be spooked by a toddler darting off to find her favorite cub. Carol cannot let herself think of what could have happened. One second Sophia could have been perfectly happy and free and the next she could have been seriously hurt.
"Forgetting the rules happens sometimes, Soph," Ezekiel assures her, his expression soft but still serious enough for Sophia to understand the gravity of the situation. When he reaches them, Ezekiel moves to kneel in front of Sophia. He still a little taller than her but Carol knows the importance of him kneeling to be at Sophia's height. It's not about appearing threatening and instilling fear in her daughter's heart but about reminding her how working with animals holds a big responsibility that he trusts her with. "What matters is that you remembered before something bad happened. "
"I remembered," Sophia assures him. "I remembered, daddy."
"And next time you'll wait, won't you Soph?" Carol needs to hear her daughter say it. Sophia is a good girl and she is good at following rules. She knows that her daughter will remember from now on and will follow instructions to the tee but she still needs to hear it to calm her strongly beating heart.
"I will, Mama." She replies as she pulls the toy down so that her little face shows. "I promise. I'll wait."
"Thank you, sweet pea." She bends down to press a kiss to her daughter's head but Sophia in turn wraps her arms around her neck to be picked up. Carol doesn't hesitate to embrace her and pull her until Sophia wraps her legs around her and settles on Carol's hip. "Now, give me a smile, and let's go see Shiva." She gently taps the end of her finger against Sophia's nose.
Sophia tentatively cracks a smile but it's not enough for Carol. Deciding to distract her while Ezekiel goes about checking that the coast is clear, Carol urges her to smile bigger. "Oh! I know that's not my baby's biggest smile!"
Sophia's hands quickly raise to cover her mouth to try and hide the smile that's already blossoming, her tiger plush caught between her and her mother's body. "Is that a big smile I see?" Carol asks as tiny dimples appear on Sophia's cheek. "Hmm, I'm not sure. I think I've seen bigger smiles."
Not caring if anyone catches them being silly, Carol leans forward and blows a raspberry on Sophia's neck. Sophia instantly dissolves into giggles, her lips displaying a huge smile as she leans her head to the side to try and block her mother from blowing any more raspberries. "Tickles!"
"Oh, I know!" Carol replies before going in for a second raspberry.
Sophia's laughter calms her enough to control her fast-beating heart. They'd been extremely lucky that nothing bad had happened and Sophia had learned a valuable lesson in the process, but it had still been extremely scary.
Having blocked her mother's raspberry blowing, Sophia leans against her, pressing her cheek to her mother's cheek. She lets out a little sigh before wrapping her arms loosely around her mother's neck again. "I sorry mama. You got scared."
"I did." She's not going to hide her fear from her daughter, not on this. "Sweet pea, do you really promise to wait? I know you love Shiva and you wanted to see her, but-"
"Gotta be careful?" Sophia interrupts.
"That's right. We gotta be careful."
"Cause tigers are wild, Mama."
"Hmm hmm. We gotta follow the rules, sweetheart. I gotta know you are safe at all times. Shiva is small and playful, but there are other tigers here that are bigger. We don't want to get hurt and we don't want Ezekiel to get in trouble, do we?"
"No, Mama. I follow rules. I promise."
"Good, now give me a kiss."
Sophia gives her a peck on the nose before hugging her head tightly. Carol groans a little, mostly playfully, which prompts Sophia to tighten her arms just a little bit more. Ezekiel catches them this way and though he seems a little confused, he quickly asks. "Are we pretending to be a boa constrictor?"
"Silly, Zekey," Sophia mumbles as she releases her mother. "Sorry, daddy. I behave now."
Ezekiel reaches over to ruffle Sophia's hair. Again one of her pigtails loses the fight against staying in place. At least Carol now knows why the pigtail had been about to give out before. "Thank you, Princess. Now, let us go see Shiva. The coast is clear."
Shiva is waiting for them. The tiny cub moves from one side of her enclosure to the other, tail swishing back and forth. As soon as she sees them she pushes herself up on her hind legs and presses her front paws on the glass. She lets out her version of a loud roar to tell them how much she has missed them. Just like Sophia, Shiva is impatient and wants to go back to her family as soon as she can. Just like Sophia, she too has to wait until Ezekiel goes through the whole process of opening the enclosure.
"Go on then." As soon Carol puts Sophia back on the ground and the door has opened, both the tiger and the human cubs reunite. Shiva is instantly licking on Sophia's face, running all over her once the little girl falls for her floor in a fit of giggles.
"All right you two, time to learn how to swim."
They separate only because Carol and Sophia have to get ready. It takes her longer to get Sophia into her swimsuit since her daughter is practically jumping in place, ready to not only play with her beloved Shiva but learn how to swim. Once she's done and Carol has changed as well, they meet Ezekiel and Shiva and follow them further back into the enclosure.
By the way that Shiva struts besides Ezekiel, Carol is sure that they are going somewhere she knows. She's never been in this part of the building but she trusts Ezekiel to keep them safe so Carol follows behind them. Ezekiel guides them to what looks like a heavy door where he punches in his code and waits for the click that tells them the door is open. As soon as the door is partly open, Shiva slides through the small space without even waiting for them. By the time Ezekiel opens the door fully, Carol knows exactly why the cub looks so at home.
Seeing the tiger exhibition from the other side of the glass is an experience that Carol hadn't been ready for. Since she had only ever seen it full of tigers, she can't help but tighten her hold on Sophia, ready to protect her. It's silly since she knows Ezekiel would never bring them into a den full of tigers, but she can't help her protective instinct.
"Don't worry, my love," Ezekiel says as he reaches her side. He leans to the side and presses a kiss to her temple. "The tigers are in their other enclosure. They are going to clean this place up, patch some areas, and I requested permission to bring Shiva and you guys in for a swimming lesson before it happened."
She relaxes almost as soon as she hears his explanation. Sophia, who had been staring around with wide eyes, starts wiggling against her to be put down. Carol lets her slide down, making sure she reaches the floor before fully releasing her. "Be careful, Soph."
"Yes, Mama." Sophia throws over her shoulder.
Both Shiva and Sophia disperse before Carol can say another word. Without her daughter in her arms, she can't help but start becoming a little self-conscious. Slowly she raises her arms to wrap around her waist, her shoulders slouching forward in an attempt to make herself slightly smaller. A part of her feels dumb for even feeling this way, after all, Ezekiel had already seen all of her scars and had seen up close the bruises Ed's last attack had left. Another part of her, the part she hates the most which sounds a lot like her ex-husband, reminds her that he'd only seen the scars so that he could take pictures of them and nothing else. This time there is no reason as to why her scars need to be out in the open and the shame that had been hammered into her mind for years comes with a vengeance.
Finding a nearby rock to sit on, Carol remains as still and quiet as possible. She keeps track of where everyone is but she doesn't move to avoid attracting attention. Silently, she watches as Sophia bee-lines from the tree trunk she had been attempting to climb on to Ezekiel's side at the water's edge. Her daughter patiently waits while Ezekiel removes his shoes and enters the water. He had already changed into his khaki uniform which he obviously doesn't mind getting wet.
"Come on, Soph!" He calls out, extending his arms for her little girl to run into.
Sophia doesn't hesitate. She removes the sandals Carol had made her keep on then rushes into the water. Her laughter is quick to follow as she splashes at the end then waddles over to where Ezekiel is sitting down. The water barely covers his legs and raises up to Sophia's waist but the little girl is delighted.
"Swim, daddy!" She demands before squatting down so that the water reaches further up her body.
Ezekiel turns to look to the side, his eyes finding her right away. She gives him a small closed smile that no doubt gives away her sudden awkwardness. Carol knows that he senses something wrong right away because he raises an eyebrow at her, his own smile faltering. "Everything all right?"
Carol nods quickly though she can't help but raise a hand to adjust the thick strap on her shoulder. The movement covers one of the bad scars but catches his attention as well. "Oh." He whispers.
"Ignore me."
"I could never." He assures her. He's not that far away from where she's sitting down so she can see the sincerity in his eyes.
"I'm being silly, I know." She readjusts the strap yet again then lets her hand fall on her lap before once more wrapping it around her waist.
He shakes his head at her right away. "You aren't. Words may not break bones but they certainly hurt."
Of course, he understands why she's being hesitant. She doesn't even have to tell him for him to know that she's battling the demons that Ed had left behind. As much as she wishes that they didn't affect her, her subconscious is still full of Ed's lies and painful words. His kisses on her skin had begun the healing process but the fight in her mind was something she had to do on her own.
"If it helps, I believe that I have never seen a more gorgeous woman in my whole life."
It does help to make her smile bigger but she dips her head to hide it. She knows he's being too kind and yet she can't deny that it makes her feel a tiny bit beautiful, even if she's not quite ready to move from her rock just yet.
"We'll be here whenever you are ready to join us," Ezekiel assures her before sending a wink her way and turning his attention back to her daughter who has decided that splashing him is the perfect way to get him to look at her.
"All right little princess, it seems you are going to be the first one in today's lesson. You ready?"
"I ready, Daddy!"
For the next hour, while Shiva continues doing whatever she's doing all over the trees, Carol watches as Ezekiel teaches Sophia how to float with her face above the water, how to hold her breath as long as she can, and how to kick to propel herself. As she watches him lovingly teach her little one, Carol slowly relaxes until she takes off her shoes and dips her feet in the water. She knows Ezekiel noticed but continued on as if nothing had happened so that she wouldn't feel that the attention was on her.
"That's it, Soph! Keep moving your legs."
Sophia continues kicking with all her might, splashing enough water that it reaches Carol. She jumps slightly at the sensation of the droplets falling on her skin but does nothing to brush them away.
Ezekiel changes Sophia's position in his arms, which he's been using to support her swimming attempts, and lets her sit on his hip. "Now, let's try the arms. Have you ever seen a dog swimming?" Sophia shakes her head no at Ezekiel's questions.
With a tilt of the head, Sophia looks up at him inquisitively. "How?"
Carol watches as Ezekiel folds his free arm close to his chest, his hand pretending to be a paw which he then flops around. Confused, Sophia's nose crinkles. "That's silly, daddy."
"Well… I can't quite teach you while holding you." He admits.
Deciding its the perfect time to slip into the water, Carol slides off the rock. She's not that far in, the water barely reaching her knees, but she wades her way over to them until the level has reached her belly. "Here, hand her over." She extends her arms to receive Sophia who happily goes to her before perching herself on her mother's hip. "Now you can do the full demonstration."
Ezekiel blinks at her before letting out a chuckle. "And here I thought you were going to do the example."
"Do it, daddy!"
Carol knows Ezekiel is unable to deny her daughter anything. He doesn't let her down and dips fully into the water, moving towards the deepest part of the man-made lake in the middle of the enclosure. Both she and Sophia start laughing as soon as he mimics dogs swimming, paddling as best as he can to keep his head above the water, his dreads floating around him as he goes. The silly way that he's doing it has to be for their benefit because there is no way that he doesn't know how to properly swim. She loves him even more for doing it.
"Now me, Daddy." Having seen what Ezekiel was doing, Sophia lets go of Carol to dip further into the water. It takes a couple of seconds, where Carol has to keep her mommy instinct to pluck Sophia right out of the water as reigned in as possible, but eventually Sophia comes out with the aid of the vest, paddling as hard as she can with her arms.
"Don't forget to kick your feet, Sophia." Carol reminds her as she watches her go, taking small steps behind her to reach for her right away in case she runs out of steam.
Even with the kicking, Sophia is slow to reach Ezekiel though he praises her immensely when she does. "That was amazing, Sophia. You swam!"
"I did?" Sophia asks astonished. Her eyelashes are mostly stuck together but her eyes still open wide when she realizes that she had indeed swum. She quickly turns to look over at Carol and grins when she finds her just a couple of steps away. "Mama! I swam!"
"You did, sweat pea." Carol leans in to kiss her wet cheeks as soon as she reaches her. "I'm so proud."
No sooner has she pulled away that Sophia is ready for another attempt. Carol walks backward until she reaches the spot she'd been on before, then opens her arms for Sophia. "Come on! Can you reach Mama?"
Sophia goes in before Ezekiel is quite ready to let her go. For a second she watches the color partly drain from Ezekiel's face before he sighs in relief when Sophia once more bobbles up. When he turns to look at her, Carol can't help but agree with how he's feeling. There is nothing fun in watching your child go under the water even when you know the vest will protect her. To know that Ezekiel felt the exact way she did further cements the fact that Ezekiel loves Sophia as only a father can.
When Sophia's little body becomes too exhausted to continue making the trips between Carol and Ezekiel, Carol grabs her and lets her rest against her. Her daughter breathes hard with the effort she's just gone through but clings on tightly, not quite ready to succumb to the tiredness.
"Look," Ezekiel calls for their attention as he tilts his head towards the water's edge.
Shiva, who up until that moment had shown absolutely no desire to go near the water, is staring at them from the edge. She's pacing from one side to the other, clearly wanting to go near the family but not quite sure what to make of the fact that they were in there. She raises a paw and dips it into the water but quickly pulls it back, shaking it just like a cat would. Again she tries with the other paw only to have the same results.
"Is she scared?" Sophia asks. She's turned to look at Ezekiel for an answer to the odd behavior her best friend seems to be exhibiting.
"Maybe." Ezekiel moves a little bit closer to the tiger prompting Sophia to try and throw herself back in the water to swim up to him.
"Hold on, missy." Carol quickly secures her against her hip. "Rest a little. Ezekiel knows what he is doing."
"But, Mama." Sophia pushes her bottom lip out in an attempt to get her mother to release her but Carol shakes her head.
"We have to wait."
Relaxing against her, Sophia finally relents. Shiva is a kind animal that absolutely adores Sophia, there is no doubt about it, but this is something new and there are myriads of ways that it could turn out. The last thing she wants is to add the Sophia factor in and make Ezekiel deal with even more unknowns.
As soon as Ezekiel is near the shore, Shiva instantly tries to reach him. Once again the sensation of water proves to be too much and she retreats. Shiva then lets out a pitiful yelp as if to tell Ezekiel that she wants him by her side. Instead of reaching for her, Ezekiel sits down on the edge and waits her out. Carol knows how important it is for Shiva to not feel trapped and pulling her into the water would make her feel like she had no other choice and could make her get scared which is the last thing they need.
"You can do it, Shiva!" Sophia calls out to encourage the cub.
Carol will never know if it was Ezekiel's proximity to her or Sophia's encouragement that prompts Shiva's movement but the next second the cub is leaping as best as she can over the water and into Ezekiel's lap. Ezekiel laughs and quickly cuddles her close, pressing a kiss to the top of her furry head before releasing her to roam on his lap.
"She looks scared," Sophia notes as they watch closely. "I don't think she likes water, Mama."
"It's new to her baby." Carol reminds her. "She's never had to go into the water to learn to swim. She must be nervous. Weren't you a little nervous when you came in?"
Sophia seems to think of her answer though she eventually admits that she had. "A little tiny itty bit." She shows Carol exactly how much by holding her fingers together. She's sure that if she looks close enough, Carol will be able to find just the tiniest of separation between Sophia's fingers that support her daughter's words. She's not going to doubt her though.
"Then maybe that's how she's feeling too."
Shiva doesn't prove her wrong. As much as she tries to remain on Ezekiel's lap, eventually, her tail falls into the water which brings a domino effect as she jumps scared from Ezekiel's lap right into the water. Since it's not deep, Shiva splutters and yelps and makes her way right back towards Ezekiel where she shakes the water off as best as she can.
"Oh no," Carol mumbles under her breath which is repeated by Sophia. She can't help but take a couple of steps closer to make sure that their little tiger is fine. "Is she okay?"
"Just a little surprised, but unharmed," Ezekiel promises.
The sudden dipping into the water, while shocking and not entirely welcomed, serves to activate Shiva's curiosity. Slowly she dips her paws in again. This time she doesn't pull them out right away, instead, she looks up at Ezekiel as if to ask if what she is doing is allowed.
"Feels good, Shiva?" He asks before he tenderly smooths his hand down Shiva's back in a way that reminds Carol of a tiger mother cleaning her cub. "I bet you are going to be a powerful swimmer."
Though not appearing to be fully convinced, Shiva does continue exploring, dipping her paws every once in a while before relaxing in the safety of Ezekiel's lap. "Let's try something, Shiva."
With careful movement, Ezekiel cradles the cub against him and scoots deeper into the water. Shiva doesn't react badly but she still clings to Ezekiel as much as she can. "Good girl, Shiva." Carol hears Ezekiel assure the cub as he helps her climb up his chest and towards his back. Once Shiva has been secured on his back, Ezekiel moves even deeper until he's fully standing and the water has risen to cover most of his back. "Let's piggyback for a while."
Sophia, not wanting to be left behind, follows that cue to climb her way up Carol's back in an attempt to imitate Shiva and Zeke. With her arms around her mother's neck, she holds on as Carol follows Ezekiel into the deeper end, her little body floating behind.
"She's paddling." Carol knows Ezekiel can't quite see what Shiva is doing so she describes it for him, watching as the tiger cub paddles experimentally with her hind legs.
"Good. Her webbed toes will help her push the water back. She should be letting go soon, I believe."
It takes them two whole laps around the area before Shiva finally pushes away from Ezekiel. For the first couple of seconds, she paddles just like Sophia had been taught, an unsure look on her face that makes Carol want to reach for her and keep her safe. Then, as if she'd been doing it all her life, Shiva relaxes and starts swimming, her strength propelling her fast in the water.
"She's fast," Sophia notes as she holds on to her mother much like a koala bear would. "So fast."
"Someday you will swim just as fast as her," Ezekiel promises as he nears them. "This is gonna help her immensely. She'll grow stronger, her leg will heal properly." He adds.
Carol can see the pride in his face as he watches Shiva move around. She knows how much he loves the cub, but seeing him actively teach her to overcome whatever shortcomings the other tigers had decided Shiva had, makes her as proud of Ezekiel as he is of the cub. "You did good." She tells him as she moves to stand at his side, her shoulder bumping against his.
Ezekiel turns to look at her, his eyes somewhat wet and not from the water they've been swimming in. He bumps her shoulder as well before his hand reaches for hers underwater. "You did too."
With swimming done for the day, Ezekiel guides them out of the tiger exhibition and back into the rehabilitation center. Together they dry their respective cubs and prepare them for the trip back home. By the time Carol has got Sophia out of the swimsuit and vest and into her normal clothes, her daughter is a sleepy pile of limbs. While Sophia cuddles her toy tiger, Carol quickly takes off her own suit, dries herself up, changes into her clothes, and wrings out the excess water of both swimsuits. She must have taken longer than she thought because she soon hears the scratching at the door that signals Shiva has found them.
"I'll be right out Shiva," Carol calls out as she bends down to pick up her now sleeping child. Ezekiel had been right, the swim session had gotten rid of all the sugar Sophia had consumed and had left her thoroughly exhausted. Expertly balancing both her child and the wet clothes she had stuffed in a bag, Carol opens the door to find a puffy Shiva staring up at her. "Oh look at how cute you are!"
"She looks just like Sophia's toy." Ezekiel agrees. Once he catches sight of Sophia slumped against her, he grins. "Told you it was going to tire her out."
Carol turns enough to press a kiss to Sophia's forehead. In return, Sophia sleepily snuggles further against her chest before settling once more, completely asleep, and unaware of what she'd just done. "Let me find a place to set her down and I'll help you get everything ready."
"No need, I prepared everything in advance." Bending down, Ezekiel picks up Shiva who all but snuggles against his chest as well. It's funny to her how despite being completely different species, Sophia and Shiva share many things in common, including their penchant to snuggle. "I just have to convince Shiva to go into her transport pen."
"Something tells me you won't struggle much." Ezekiel gently rearranges Shiva so that he can press a kiss to her head. Little ears wiggle contently before her eyelids drop close. "See? Two cubs down."
It doesn't take Ezekiel long to have Shiva in her pen, comfortably sleeping on the blanket they place at the bottom so that she won't skid around. "Here, hand me over the wet clothes." Carol does as requested, handing him the bag and getting a better hold of her sleeping daughter.
"Are we missing anything?" She looks over her shoulder to see if anything has been left behind. Finding nothing, she turns towards the door where Ezekiel waits for them, looking at them with a loving expression.
The walk to the car is done in comfortable silence. They walk so close that their arms brush against one another. There is no doubt in Carol's mind that if she wasn't using both hands to hold Sophia to her, their hands would have brushed. In fact, seeing her newfound boldness, Carol is sure that they would have been walking hand in hand, looking every bit like the family she had seen reflected on the store's automatic doors.
How she aches to be that family.
She knows that if she says the word, Ezekiel will dedicate his life to make them both happy. He loves her as much as she loves him and it's obvious that he loves Sophia as well. Ed is not an impediment anymore. She is officially a divorcee with absolutely no ties that could stop her from showing Ezekiel how deep her feelings for him have started to run. Why should she hold herself back?
"Let me put her inside and then I'll get the door."
Ezekiel is such a gentleman, such a loving and pure soul, that she can't help but wonder if she'll do him a disservice by letting her inhibitions fall. He certainly deserves someone better than a divorced woman full of fears and pains that carries a child in tow. His kindness and openness could help him find a wonderful woman to love who would love him as much as Carol already did. He could have children of his own to dote on as much as he dotes on Sophia. He could-
"What's on your mind, my Queen?"
The sound of the car's sliding door makes her jump back to reality. She blinks surprised before shaking her head. She doesn't want to risk telling him her thoughts; not for fear that he would laugh at her but for fear that he'd realize just how little she has to offer and agree with her.
"Nothing," she mumbles. "Just tired musings."
"Whatever it is, I can tell you aren't enjoying it." He reaches to take Sophia from her arms before gently transferring her in her car seat. Sophia whimpers at the transfer, raising a hand to rub at her eye before she settles comfortably. After making sure that she won't wake up, Carol watches him carefully buckle Sophia in. "You can always talk to me. If I have done something to bring you shame, I beg your forgiveness."
"No Zeke, you've done nothing." She quickly assures him. The last thing she wants is for him to think that he has hurt her in any way. "I just let my mind get the best of me sometimes."
Ezekiel makes sure to not slam the door close, in fact, he closes it so softly that Carol wonders if it even latched at all. He turns to her right away, his hand searching for hers to hold on to tightly. He remains quiet which she's grateful for since it allows her to take a breath to quiet her mind. "I saw our reflection at the store." She explains. "We looked so happy. So normal. Whoever saw us, they wouldn't know we've been in each other's lives less than half a year, they wouldn't know I just came from divorcing a horrible husband, or that my body is littered with scars. They just saw a couple with a child. A happy family."
"Does that bother you?"
"No! Not at all!" She promises. Carol squeezes his hand tightly, pulling him closer to her so that he can feel her rapid heartbeat because she knows her words will fail her. Her throat tightens as she tries to push the words out, fear of losing everything gripping her very soul. She knows she has to tell him, knows she can't keep it from him. They've decided to pursue whatever is blossoming between them but she's still afraid. "It's just... I want it so bad."
Ezekiel lets go of her hand only to wrap his arms around her. He rests his chin against the top of her head and pulls her a little closer. "I want it too, Carol." She hears him admit. "I share your fears, my love. I know you think I deserve better. That I deserve an idealized woman you think you can't measure up to, a woman who has seen no pain or trauma, who can do no harm to me. Meanwhile, I fear you'll realize I am nothing but a zookeeper with a dramatic flair. I am not rich nor do I have a fancy job. I am just a man trying to help animals, a man who has desperately fallen for you."
Carol pulls back and tilts her head up to look at his face. It had never occurred to her that he could be hiding fears of his own. She had never stopped to think that Ezekiel, the man who gave so freely and asked for so little in return, could be afraid that she would find someone better. It made no sense to her but he feared it nonetheless. She can see it in his eyes, can feel it in the way he holds her. He is as afraid as she is.
"Aren't we a pair?" She whispers.
"It seems we are." Ezekiel leans down to press his forehead to hers, his eyes closed. She can feel his breath against her face, warm, and sweet. It soothes her right away. Unable to keep away, Carol tilts her head enough to caress his nose with hers before placing a sweet kiss to his lips.
"What do we do about it?"
"Hold on to each other? Brave the future side by side, build that family we both want."
His suggestion doesn't sound bad at all. In fact, it sounds perfect to her. Together they can build the family she saw in the reflection, the family she's envisioned not so long ago taking a stroll on zoo grounds, the family she had always dreamt of.
"Yes, let's do that." She whispers against his lips before she kisses him again. "Come on, take us home."