Afterglow

A/N: I made an AMV using the song 'Afterglow' by Taylor Swift over a month ago, and ever since I've had this idea for a chapter. And now I've finally written it. Watch my AMV on YouTube called: 'Sasuke's Apologies - Afterglow AMV'. The channel name is Sakura_Blossoms 97 but you'll know it's me as my wattpad version of this story is linked in the description.

The setting sun painted the sky in pastels of pink, lavender and baby blue... The sun was a magnificent painter, if not the best - wasn't it? The lands glowed a heavenly light, and Konoha shone like the centrepiece of an artwork. At the heart of the village, lived a woman and her child who held a man's heart in the palm of their hands. In the afterglow they traded stories and surmised when he would be returning.

The Uchiha patriarch would travel back and forth from Konoha, gone for weeks at a time and then would come back to his cherished family bearing gifts. Whether it was flowers, teddies, or his smiles, his two girls loved all of them. His wife would often tell him that the greatest gift was him - safe and sound. Whenever he was at Konoha, the days would be filled with spending as much time with his daughter, teaching her the names of new things - whether it be the names of different weapons or different flowers - and in turn she would teach him the best places to view the sun from, as she would grasp his lone hand and tug him along as he trailed behind her, an ever expanding heart hidden behind a small smile. His nights were filled with silent confessions as he made love to his wife as often as he could, for his heart ached for her when he was absent. Making love to her rushed him with an adrenaline that no battle could ever compete with.

It was a cold night in December, and his wife slept soundlessly next to him huddled under covers as she dreamt of the passionate night that had just ensued. He envied her for the ability to allow slumber to take her so quickly, as he stared at the blank ceiling hovering over him, thinking back to his most recent sins... The crimes he committed which he could not disclose to his wife.

There was a dull ache in his heart as had realised the enormity of what he had done. It was the second time he had used his sharingan on his daughter who had previously suffered from a viral attack where she could have lost her sight entirely, if it wasn't for her parents. His wife's words echoed in his mind...

"If someone else uses a dojutsu on someone who's suffered from the virus quite soon after - we're not sure on the timescale, just yet - then the symptoms may surface again."

"I'm sure you won't use your sharingan on her".

What had he done? He had risked his daughter's chance at seeing colours and the beauties of life, and for what? He tried to rationalise with himself, as he couldn't confide in his spouse. The last time someone had put her child at risk, she had cut them out altogether of their lives. He wouldn't be able to handle that. To know he wouldn't be given the chance to watch his child grow up and to hold his wife at night... it was all too much. He told himself he did what he had to do in the moment. It was a necessary evil... But was it? A child shouldn't be exposed to their parents - or anyone - making love. A child shouldn't have to see their father all bloodied and bruised, on the brink of death, as he falls into their mother's lap. He closed his eyes and felt a tear stroll down what his wife liked to call a 'perfectly arched face'. He didn't know how he looked his wife and daughter in the eye, and ironically, that was the problem.

He raked his hand through his tousled hair and let out an exasperated sigh. His wife's hand suddenly fell on his chest as she snuggled closer and mumbled, eyes still closed, "Can't sleep?" When he didn't answer, she suggested, "Maybe you should put some clothes on."

He felt her stir beside him, her hair falling over his shoulder and she pressed her snug knitted pyjamas onto him. "Fine, I'll warm you myself," he heard her stifle a giggle and soon enough heard soft snores ooze out of her and tickle his neck.

He lay there like a corpse, unable to receive anymore of her immense bank of unwavering love which he was sure he was undeserving of. Sleep wouldn't take him, but his guilt did. He left her again at the breaking of dawn, before she could notice that her husband had dissolved into a puddle of tears.

The snow had melted away, and in its place buds had started to bloom. A red rose grew up out of ice frozen ground and the transition of seasons mirrored his own transitions as the ice caps in his own heart had melted away, and he felt hopeful as the sun rained down on him with a yearning for the future to be bright. As much as he missed his family, he knew his missions would contribute towards that bright future, and so he carried on with his duty, flowing with the river of time. It also helped that the continuous letters from his wife eased him as she had not mentioned any changes with Sarada, and so, maybe it was all okay. Maybe enough time had passed from when she had been attacked from the virus and the first time he had bore his crimson eye into her, that it no longer mattered. She would grow up to be a beautiful young woman, and maybe awaken the sharingan out of love for her parents and her eyes would be the purest to be born out of the Uchiha. She would carry on the will of fire inherited from her hometown, probably passed down from Naruto, who may be Hokage by that time; and she may be a ferocious kunochi like her mother; and an even more gentle soul like her uncle Itachi. Sasuke didn't think he had much of value to pass on from himself, other than his 'striking good looks' that Sakura never shut up about. He sat on a log in the middle of a forest, with dewy leaves hanging over him; the droplets finding a home for themselves on his raven black hair that sprouted from the rain of the night before.

He was roasting a tomato skewer over the fire when his messenger hawk landed itself in front of him. Sasuke spied the pink lace ribbon that the letter was wrapped up in, and he smiled to himself. The pink reminded him of his wife's exotic rosy hair, and her even pinker lips; her blushes were pinker still. He could almost feel her skin brushing against him as the thought of her clouded him. She was heaven. Even far apart, just the thought of her was enough for him to feel as if he was home again, and that's what kept him going even in the darkest of nights.

*...I don't wanna think of anything else now that I thought of you...*

*...Things will never be the same...*

His hawk was ruffling its feathers as Sasuke pulled out the letter and untied the ribbon. He unrolled the letter, and the colour drained out of his face...

Sasuke,

I know this is all very sudden, and I'm sorry if you're in the middle of something, but I need you to find Karin as fast as you can.

Sarada awakened her sharingan last week in the middle of crying for you, but since two nights ago she's been complaining of headaches and she now has a high fever. I don't want to leave Sarada alone and no one else in Konoha knows how to get in contact with Karin as fast as you do.

Find Karin and give her the scrolls attached.

Please hurry.

Sakura.

His hand trembled and his own vision blurred as he read over the letter over and over again, trying to decipher each letter through his tears and the blotches and scribbled writing which only could have been written in haste. All his fears he had thought had been extinguished had chased after him and found him. They were now haunting him, taunting him. He was engulfed with regrets and terror. The purple spirals in his eye flashed as he flicked through black pools, going in and out of hideouts, driving him crazy. It didn't matter if the rinnengan took a massive toll on his body and depleted his chakra, he would force himself to get to Karin and back to his daughter, even if it tore him to shreds.

He fell away into reckless abandon. He was on the concrete ground lying face flat, trying but failing to control his breathing when he heard footsteps rush towards him.

"Sasuke!" cried a familiar voice of a woman. The name cut the air like a shard of glass.

He saw a flash of red and black glasses, and suddenly he was being rolled onto his side.

"Why are you here? What's happened?! You're the wrong Uchiha I said I was indebted to," Karin jibed.

Sasuke grunted, and fished into his black pouch for the letter and scrolls. Her eyes flickered from left to right, left to right as she took it all in. "Sasuke. I won't be able to tend to you right now," Karin spoke, her words slurring together as she ran off; her words echoed throughout the eerie cavern. "This is more urgent."

Sasuke grunted in agreement. He pushed himself up and dragged his body towards the shadow that was dancing to the flickering candles that lit his path. He leaned against the wall and panted, "Will... we... be able to... save her... eyes?" He could barely see anything himself. Everything looked black save for the flicker of light in his peripheral vision. He heard a shuffling of noise and hurried footsteps pace back and forth across the room. He dragged her name across his tongue between gritted teeth, "Karin..."

"Sas-uke! I can only do so much! I need to focus!" she snapped back.

Sasuke slumped to the floor in response and rested his head on the wall behind him. He counted the many sins he had committed over his lifetime, but he found he didn't have enough fingers for that. He resorted to closing his eyes and cursing himself. Why is that he always hurt those closest to him? His mind jolted through incoherent thoughts, none of them quite fitting together like misplaced jigsaw pieces. He thought that the purification of Sakura could stop the Uchiha curse of harming each other - but maybe he still hadn't been completely freed from his own past sins. Sarada... He would give up his own eyes if it meant he could save hers. The ghost of his past had sought him out, and embraced him, like a lover's kiss. He struggled to reign his emotions, and battle through his own demons. He just wanted to keep his family safe, but failure after failure...

"Sasuke!," Karin's voice cut sharp through his thoughts, and he looked at her kneeling down beside him with her arm stretched out towards him. "Bite me."

He took hold of her arm and bit into it. He ignored her as her face transitioned into a light pink and instead focused on how his body immediately felt recharged. When he was done, he dropped her arm and both Uchiha and Uzumaki stood up. She handed him a letter and two scrolls, and bid him farewell. "From what I've understood from Sakura's notes to me, Sakura has managed to stabilise Sarada. But she's currently unconscious. I've prescribed some medication that will need to be fed through drips- agh, Sakura can read the rest in the letter. Anyway, there's a chance that Sarada may have lost a bit of her sight - don't look at me like that! She'll still be able to see, but her vision would be a bit blurry. In one of the scrolls there's glasses fit for a child just in case. Now go!"

Sasuke didn't need telling twice. He took her advice and opened a portal that dropped him in Konoha hospital. His eyes glazed over the staff until he found a familiar face. He tugged at the elbow of a middle-aged woman with black hair that was cut short inches above her shoulders. "Oh, Sasuke!" the woman dressed in black exclaimed.

"Where's Sakura and Sarada?!"

"Oh, uh..." he waited impatiently as his wife's senior flicked though the pages on her clipboard. "Oh, it looks like Sarada's been discharged. Sakura must be tending to her at- oh!"

Sasuke left as soon as he understood. He jumped over rooftops until he landed on his own. He jumped down onto the porch and rushed in and then up the stairs. He flung Sarada's bedroom door open only to find her lying in her bed, with a wet cloth placed on her forehead. Snuggled up next to her was her favourite green teddy, and beside the bed sat her latest pink bunny toy. Sakura was slumped at the foot of her bed, clearly exhausted, as her head rested under one arm on the bed with her hair tied back as it usually was when she was on a shift or doing the household chores. She stirred when she felt Sasuke's hand tug at her shoulder. She pressed her eyes open, "Sasuke-kun..."

She immediately rose up when she realised who was standing over her. "Oh, Sasuke! Did you go to Karin?!"

He handed her the letter and scrolls, and she immediately got to work. He heard her inhale a sharp breath as she felt Sarada's skin with the back of her hand. His whole body tensed up - "It seems that she's conscious now. She must have woken up a few hours ago and fell asleep." - and relaxed.

"Karin gave me the rundown," he said. "But is she going to be okay?"

Sakura looked at her husband and smiled with water on the brim of her eyes. "Y-yes. I think she will, Sasuke-kun. Thank you."

He let out a sigh of relief. "But... it won't be the same will it?"

The smile evaporated from Sakura's gentle face. "No... It won't be." She sat on the edge of the bed and stroked their daughter's hair. "It looks like she may have to wear glasses, which is fine. But, I'll need to regularly examine her eyesight just in case. Until I know for sure she's okay."

He furrowed his eyebrows and whispered, "I'm sorry."

She turned her head sharply towards Sasuke and asked, "For what? This isn't your fault. I mean, sure she activated the sharingan because she missed you, but that was out of your control. You need to stop being so hard on yourself, Sasuke-kun. Again, it's because of you that it's not worse than it is."

Sasuke looked into the two pools of green light, and almost broke under her compassion. He almost spilled to her his dark secrets of using his sharingan to manipulate Sarada's memories.

"Sasuke?" she asked, softly.

He blinked back tears and then sat on the other side of Sarada and caressed his daughter's face. Forgive me. He didn't know what else to say except, "Thank you, Sakura. For everything."

The smile he loved so much broke again into her face and she brought her hand onto his own face. "I should be saying that," she chuckled. "I love you, darling."

"Hmm," he hummed. "Yes." I love you too.

Another two hours passed before their daughter peeled her eyes open. Pink and raven hair hovered over her. "M-Mama...?" the daughter asked. "Who- who this man?"

Gasps and whispers could be heard in the newly refurnished room. In place of the lavender carpet there was now wooden flooring at the child's request, and the purple walls had been painted yellow - presumably to reflect all the stories her father had told her about the healing of daylight.

Sakura unsealed the last scroll and a small red frame of glasses sat between her hands. She placed them over her daughter's eyes, and asked, "Is that better Sarada?"

Sarada blinked a few times before jumping up and throwing her arms around the man's neck. "Papa!" she cried into him. "You're home Papa! I missed you. Welcome home."

A tear rolled down his cheek and he hugged her back. "I'm home, Sarada."

He continued his duties to the world whilst also visiting Sakura and Sarada as much as he could. His heart broke every time he saw Sarada wear those red glasses, but then Sakura would come as she sensed his tension, and eased him with a smile, a touch, or an 'I love you, Sasuke-kun'. His starlight was three years old now, and he brought her a new pair of glasses from Karin, as well as a new white blouse that came with a fitted red tie. The blouse went well with her red skirt that Sakura had bought for her, he mused. He smiled as Sarada ran in her new red shoes complete with her new outfit and dragged Papa around Konoha as they went in search for the black cats, Sask and Tachi. They could be distinguished by the fact that Tachi had a few white whiskers, and the tip of his tail was white, whereas Sask was black all over. She pouted as they didn't let her stroke them, so Sasuke picked up Sask and soothed it with tuts before allowing Sarada to carry it. She squealed with Sask in her arms and pleaded with her Papa if she could finally bring him home. Sasuke said no, they already had a Sask at home and Sarada erupted into a fit of giggles. "Papa! You're not a cat!" she laughed.

"I can be if you want me to be," he said.

"No, no! I want you to be horsey!"

He relieved Sask from Sarada's embrace and father and daughter watched as it scrambled away and found Tachi. Sasuke crouched down and Sarada sat on his shoulders as he walked them home.

He heard voices as they stepped over the threshold. "But if it wasn't for you, Sakura, Naruto-kun would only be able to cook ramen," came a quiet voice.

"Oh, I don't know. Iruka Sensei also helped," his wife reminded the former Hyuga, acting modest. "But he's such a knucklehead, me and Iruka Sensei had to spend a whole two months with him to teach him how to cook different dishes! Well, you would know. You couldn't stop coming over. Oh, you're so cute when you blush, Hinata. But honestly, I don't know how you live with him! And now with two kids! Does he even help?" She asked doubtfully.

"Yes, Naruto-kun is- Oh! Sasuke-kun. Sorry. Himawari don't slobber over Uncle Sasuke." The shy girl bent down and picked up her daughter before greeting Sarada. "Hi Sarada-chan," she said, meekly. "Do you want to come to ours and play with Boruto for a bit?"

Sakura turned around in her chair and intervened, "Oh, that won't be necessary, Hinata. It's okay, really! You do enough as it is. I don't know how you hold all those parties, it must be exhausting."

Hinata turned back to face Sakura and smiled. "I really don't mind. We like having our friends over."

Sakura chuckled to herself. "Really? I always imagine it's Naruto who forces everyone to come around... But you'd really do anything for him, won't you?"

The Uzumaki by marriage flushed, before saying, "But it's the same for you, Sakura, isn't it? You and Sasuke-kun."

It was time for Sakura to flush red. "Eh?!" This only elicited a bubble of laughter from Hinata.

Sakura attempted to change the subject as she placed her cup of tea on the dining table and pulled Hinata back to her seat. "Well, don't leave on Sasuke's account. Trust me, he doesn't bite..." And then she added under her breath, "Well, maybe he only bites me..." But the comment didn't go unnoticed.

Sasuke narrowed his eyes at that comment and placed Sarada down beside him. He walked around the table and stood just behind Hinata's seat and glared at his wife. She bit his lip as she realised what she had said in his presence. The change in atmosphere could be felt by the guest, and she got up from her seat again and made her excuses. "Thank you Sakura for having me and Himawari. Erm, it's about time for Boruto to have his bath and Naruto-kun kind of struggles with that... But if you want me to take Sarada off you for a couple of hours, I can..."

Without leaving her eyes off her husband, Sakura said, "No, there won't be any need for that. But thank you, Hinata. Bye, Himawari. Sarada will show you out."

The Uchiha couple heard polite voices say farewell to each other. "Bye Himawari, bye Auntie Hinata. Tell Boruto I'll beat him at our next arm wrestling match too." They heard a soft giggle and then the door lock.

Sasuke scowled at his wife and threatened with a low voice, "Do you know what this means?"

A light blush rose up on Sakura's cheeks. "I guess... I'll have to prepare myself for my punishment tonight..." she replied back in a matching low register. Her emerald orbs flickered away and back. "But... maybe that's what I want..."

Sasuke abruptly turned his head away as he felt blood rush to his cheeks. He heard a giggle from his wife escape her dangerous lips. She always left him so... frustrated when she did things like this. The sexual tension between husband and wife was broken by a young voice, "Er, Papa? You know it's not nice to bite Mama? Do I need to report you to Hokage-sama?"

Both adults' eyes widened, and Sasuke could feel beads of sweat form under his bangs of hair. Sakura turned towards their daughter and waved her hands around frantically, "Oh no, dear. Mama was only joking! I meant... uh... Papa always loves to have a bite of my food. Yes! My food, ehehehe..."

A brow on Sarada perked up as she studied her parents. "...You're both weird," she decided. Sarada slipped her shoes off and left it in the hallway, before padding upstairs to her room.

He spied his wife edging closer towards him, and then felt a light touch on his arm. "So, erm, does that mean I get double the punishment?"

"Fuck off," he grumbled.

Later that night, they sat up in bed next to each other with only bed sheets clothing them. But for the first time, no amount of her touches or kisses could relieve him from the ocean of guilt that he was drowning into. He was being suffocated by his own sins and no healer could save him. He remembered the first time they had made love, and how the weight of his sins had consumed him shortly after, causing him to leave. But the second time, they had reconciled after discovering that something had bloomed out of that love. But now... his own curse had even spoiled the most purest form of love, and every time he looked upon his daughter's face, he was only reminded of this again and again... He couldn't bear it. She was no longer just a reminder of his reborn self, but now a reminder that he had failed his family. How could he live with himself? And to make matters worse, the knowledge that even if he hadn't been the direct cause of his daughter's partial blindness, he was still the root cause of it. She had only awakened her sharingan for the love she bore him. His absence deeply affected her, and it was only made much worse by his presence. To love something so dearly, but to have it slip away from you time and time again. He knew exactly what that felt like, and he didn't want his daughter to suffer anymore. He needed to alleviate her suffering, he couldn't cause pain to her anymore... But his duties to the world still remained. His mismatched eyes moistened at the realisation of what he needed to do.

Pink hair fell against his torso and her strong arms encircled around his waist. She had her eyes closed as her chest nestled against his heart full of new cracks. "What's wrong, darling?" she whispered.

"...It's nothing."

She looked up at him and narrowed her eyes. "If you're concerned about Sarada, you know you don't have to be. I scanned her eyes this morning and she's all good. So stop worrying."

Her thumbs stroked the corners of his eyes and they left wet with his sorrows, and she soothed him with a whisper, "We're so lucky to have you, darling. And I try to make Sarada understand why you can't be with us when you're not here. As smart as she is, she's too young to understand just yet, but I'm sure when she's a bit older she'll appreciate all that you do for her. In a few years, you can even pass down your Uchiha talents to her, hm? So just think about that."

Usually, his wife would have the exact right words to say, but this time... A sorrow encased in a drop escaped Sasuke. She kissed his tears away. "Sasuke-kun... It hurts me to see you like this..."

"I'm sorry," he rasped out in a whisper.

"Why are you apologising for? Idiot."

"I'm sorr-" He looked down at her and she bit her lip to prevent a giggle from escaping. She found his lips with hers, and when they drew away again she buried her head in his chest. "Can we always be this close?" she asked. "Forever and ever?"

The thudding of heart answered for him, but his mind was elsewhere. He kissed the strands of her hair under him. I'm sorry.

He broke under her overwhelming weight of love and felt crushed beneath her arms.

Where do they go from now?

From the soiled ground, born out of tears and the sweltering heat are flowers that bloom firstly in ones and twos, and then a whole village of colourful petals before they dance to the merry tune of the wind. Their fragrance and pollen travel across the vast lands, and even through lifetimes. Just like a folk song, the love of flowers is passed on from generation to generation. A raven-haired young girl is plucking out some of these flowers as she spends her time with her Auntie Ino and a boy of her own age, Inojin. She carefully arranges them and uses her aunt's extensive knowledge of flowers to create two bouquets: one for her Mama, and the other for her Papa. Her smile lights the world up, and casts a heavenly glow upon the flowers she has just plucked. It is a hot day in May.

Across the village, her father returns from his mission, but alas he has not come bearing gifts. Rather, his heart is heavy full of broken glass that he carries along with him - the shards cutting him in ways that his enemies could never. He sits on the burgundy couch as he waits for his wife to finish her shift. Minutes stretch out into hours, and his forlorn face stretches even further, his eyes downcast as he struggles to capture the words necessary he would need to drop onto his wife. He captures his shattered face into his hand, and the unspoken words come falling down from him like a waterfall. And that was how she found him.

"Sasuke-kun?" She came rushing over to him and knelt in front of him. "Sasuke-kun, what's wrong? Look at me. Talk to me." Her words were soft but desperate. "Let me help you. Please."

Her arms cradle his fragile frame as she picks herself up and allows her husband to fall into her. His arm wraps around her waist, and she can feel the front of her dress becoming damp. "Sasuke..." she whispers.

He rasps into her stomach, "Where's Sarada?"

She looks down at him, "She's with Ino. I was going to pick her up after a shower, but..."

"Don't."

"Okay, I won't," she agrees. "But please, Sasuke..."

He looks up at her, and his eye is red, but his sharingan hasn't been activated. He lets go of her waist and gulps. He pats the space next to him, and she understands. She takes her place by his side. There is concern written all over her face, and he knows she only wants the best for him. For them. But...

"Sakura," he finally says. "I need to talk to you..."

She intertwines her hand with his and she beckons him, "Tell me."

He forces himself to look at her innocent green eyes that only exude love and purity, that whispers to his soul I will always be here for you. His own eyes, he knows, are only filled with a dark mystery that is eating away at him, consuming him until it hurts her too - it is worse than any curse mark.

He licks his lips as he tries to form the words inside his heart, "I... It's too much," he whispers at her.

"What is?" she whispers back, her brows furrowed, trying to understand where all this has come from.

"I... I can't do this anymore... Sarada, she... I can't hurt her anymore..." He feels her hand grip his tighter and there is something flickering in her eyes. What is it? Rage? Fear?

"Sasuke-"

"Listen to me, Sakura," he begs. "I can't bear to stand the amount of pain I put her through. She's so young, and I don't want to hurt her. I don't want her to feel anymore pain. I need it to stop. I can't let her go through it..." Her grip tightens, and just that is a whole conversation on its own.

He notices the glare she gives him. "What are you saying, Sasuke?" He notices her own struggle as she speaks to him through gritted teeth.

"It's best if... Sarada doesn't see me anymore." And just like that the force around his hand is gone. Comfort is lost. And all is broken.

"You think it's best if she grows up without a father? Is that what you think?" She challenges him.

"You think that's... kind? You think that's love? You think that's FAIR?!" Her chest heaves up and down as she glares him down. "And, say you don't see Sarada, what about me?" She tests.

His hand finds her hair between them and he feels the soft lock tickle through his fingers. He suddenly finds it difficult to meet her gaze. He looks at his hand as the pink slips away right between his grasp until no colour is left. "I want to still see you, Sakura..." he confesses.

The weight on the couch becomes lighter and she is no longer sitting beside him. "No," she seethes, her voice sharp but low. "I will not have you pick between me and Sarada. You will not do this to her. To us." Her fist clenches and her face is sinister. "I will not have my daughter grow up without her father! And where did all of this even come from? You never gave any signs you were feeling like this."

Her rage radiates off of her and suddenly he is swarming in it. He can feel his own rage bubble up to the surface as he fights to suppress it down, but it is too late. It is another fight he has lost. "I did... I gave so many signs..." he said, his voice a low rumble as if a dark cloud loomed over him. And then explosion. "AND WHAT WOULD YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT, HUH, SAKURA?! YOU ALWAYS HAD EVERYTHING HANDED TO YOU ON A PLATE! AND WHAT DID YOU DO?! YOU CUT YOUR OWN FATHER AND MOTHER OUT OF SARADA'S LIFE! SO DON'T FUCKING TELL ME ABOUT NOT GROWING UP WITH PARENTS! YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO LECTURE ABOUT FAMILY TIES!" Both his crimson and purple eyes flared as his own chest heaved up and down. Up and down. His breathing became heavier, and so did his body. He just wanted to burn something. But that thought was quickly extinguished by the rain that was falling on his hand.

"Is that... Is that what you really think of me, Sasuke?" she choked out. "True, maybe I did grow up with most than a lot of other kids who had shinobi as parents, but... don't you know how much pain I felt each time you left? Even now... I... I thought you loved us, Sasuke... I thought..."

Drop by drop they came raining down. She was so... broken. He realised the significance of his words and instantly regretted it. Why did he always have to break what he loved so much? He reached out his hand towards hers, and whispered, "I do..."

But she snatched her hand away and glared down at him. "DON'T YOU TOUCH ME!" She roared. "You can have it your way, don't see Sarada. Fine. But you also won't see me. Now get out."

"Sakura-" He tried to reach out for her again.

"I SAID GET OUT!" she shrieked. She then cracked the sofa with one smooth punch and he came rolling off until he fell across the room. "Shannaro! I swear if you touch me again, I will break every bone in your body! Don't TEST ME!" He scrambled to his feet and edged closer towards her but she broke the chair in front of her and fell down, crumpled. They were a mess.

She fell down onto the floor and dissolved into a puddle. He took one last look - Forgive me, Sakura. - and left.

He couldn't stay away. He had business around Kirigakure, but he constantly found himself journeying towards Konoha again and again. It was the first week of August, and the thought of not having yet reconciled with his wife for their fourth anniversary hung over him like a dark cloud. He couldn't stand it any longer. He needed her. He thought of their first kiss together: it had been on the night where they had officially acknowledged each other as lovers after an evening on a bench that lasted for two and a half minutes. Naturally, he had found himself lying beside her on her bed for the first time; both their faces had been illuminated by light pink but it felt so natural to be beside her like that. He remembers how he had brought their foreheads together, and how she had interlocked their fingers. Their faces came closer together until they took the next step into their relationship: it was unclear who had initiated it - perhaps it been a mutual understanding between two who understood each other so well, he didn't know. But he remembered the taste of her soft, sweet lips before dreaming about an enchantress with cherry blossoms growing out of her hair... He wish he could kiss her one last time. To say sorry. To say goodbye. He didn't know what the kiss would mean if he did kiss her. He just knew he needed to do it.

He warped back to the front of his house - did he warp to the wrong place? No, he was sure this was it, then why... In front of him lay a rubble of bricks that had been piled up like a mound of leaves. He stepped closer, and he found a white and red painted brick on the floor before him. The Uchiha insignia. There were cracks all over it and it was painted in dust. He bent down and washed away the grime with a brush of his fingertips. This is what he had left behind: a home full of broken memories. He stood up and looked up at the sky and met the downpour half way. He contributed towards watering the grass beneath him, it was all he could do for his old home. Home. Where was that now? It was unclear. Everything was a haze and he didn't know where anything started or ended. Although it was the middle of summer, it felt like the coldest winters he had ever faced. His clothes clung to his skin like a child who had missed their estranged parent. He took one last look at the rubble that lay before him before he jumped off the hill and escaped towards the Hokage tower.

"Sorry, I won't be seeing anyone else today. You'll need to speak to Shikamaru if you want- " The silver haired Hokage brought his face us from the desk. "Eh, Sasuke?" Kakashi expressed surprise. "I didn't think you'd be back to report on me so soon? Mei, the Mizukage, hasn't contacted me about your mission? Unless..." Kakashi's eyes narrowed, as if to say Is this about something else?

"Kakashi. Tell me where Sakura and Sarada live."

Kakashi sighed. "I thought so. Unfortunately... you're not privy to that information."

"What?" Sasuke asked menacingly, his voice dangerously low. He took a step forward. "That's my home."

"Ah," Kakashi answered. "To be sure. But... As Hokage I have to permit my civilians' requests, and I've been personally asked not to disclose that information... To you." Sasuke scowled and glared at the man who called himself Hokage, and his fist clenched until his nails drew blood.

"But," Kakashi continued. "That doesn't mean that the other people in the village have to go by that. You know, I really don't want to get in between a lover's quarrel, so don't tell anyone - especially Sakura - but you'll have the best luck at inquiring with Naruto."

Sasuke raised a brow, and then left. He heard the Sixth Hokage mutter, "Not even a thanks..."

Sasuke hunted Naruto down from his home, to the training grounds, until he found him at Ichiraku. A few interrogations and death threats later, Sasuke held the knowledge of his family's address. It was a few hours after midday, and he found himself perched upon a tree, spying down on his wife and daughter. It was a smaller house, one fit for a small family. He saw in one window his wife was cleaning the dishes and his daughter behind her drawing pictures. He noticed that all the pictures only consisted of herself and her mother. He waited a few more hours, drinking in pink hair, the silver bangles, the diamond seal... He ingrained with his sharingan the way his daughter laughed and smiled as she told some joke to her mother. He continued to wait, and soon enough Sakura had dropped Sarada off to a friend's house, and Sakura came back. It was when she was in her bedroom getting her medical supplies ready that he made his move.

He jumped down through the open window and stood in the doorway so he was behind his wife. He was immediately met with a fist that was inches away from his face, but the face behind the fist stood frozen in shock as she realised who has intruded her home. Lips apart and emerald eyes wide. "S-Sasuke...?" she mustered out.

He gently lowered her fist and took her in with his crimson eye. She was as beautiful as ever - more than he remembered. His heart pounded in desperation to be within her arms again, to hear her confess her feelings again for the millionth time, to embrace her in his own arm and feel her hair tickle her chin, to take in her scent, as his body became one with hers.

"Sakura..." he said.

She blinked once. Twice. And then stole her wrist back, rubbing away his touch with her other hand as if he could be so easily erased. "If you have something to say, spit it out. I don't have the time for this," she spat out bitterly.

He hadn't prepared anything, so he said the first thing that came to mind. "How's Sarada?"

"Really?" She perked up an eyebrow, and crossed her arms. "Do you really think you have any right to ask that?"

"I'm sorry..." he apologised. "Maybe I don't know what to say, but, this is me trying."

And once again, it was the wrong thing to say.

"Trying?!" she echoed. "Trying would be spending time with your daughter. Trying would be coming back for your birthday when your daughter asks about you non-stop! Trying would be coming back to us-"

"I'm here now," he interrupted. "At least I'm trying", he said in a desperate plea for her to understand.

"Then, for the love you swear you bear for me and Sarada, come back to us. To both of us. Stop with all of this, and fix us again. Please. Sarada asks about you every night I can't do this no more... Let Sarada see you," she pleaded.

"I can't," he vowed.

She glared at him. "Then go. Why are you here? Better still, don't ever show your face again. It's clear you hold no love for us."

"Please, Sakura-" He reached out to feel her hair, but she took a step back.

"You need to go. Actually, I need to go." She barged past him and went down the stairs. "I have a shift right now and I can't be late-"

"When will you be finished?"

She froze. But no answer came. Maybe that's how it is when one freezes in time and space.

He didn't know what to do, should he hold her? Should he leave? But in the end he reverted to saying, "I'll be at the old house. Meet me in the afterglow. If you don't come... then I'll know where we stand."

It was those words that had awakened her again. "'We'? I didn't know there was a 'we'," she scoffed. "Leave the way you came in, I don't want there to be rumours about us." The front door opened and closed before him, and barely a slither of sunlight entered the house.

Sasuke sat on the rubble of where he once called home and looked up at the sky that he had lost himself in so many times in a state of tranquillity on this very spot with his loved ones. The mixture of pink and lavender dwindled away, until all was left was the sliver of an orange glow. The golden orb in the sky sunk lower and lower, and the day broke away until even the tweeting of the birds had stopped. Sasuke looked away and stared at the sea of grass that lay before him. He no longer knew where home was. Shadows merged with the darkness of the night, until it was unclear where the sunlight was obstructed in the dayspring. The coldness of the night touched him, and left him with kisses of broken promises all along his skin as he shivered. He didn't remember August having been so cold.

He was still staring at the grass, wondering when he would see it in human form when he felt a warm presence beside him.

He lifted his head up and looked at the orbs of grass and admitted, "I wasn't sure if you would come."

"Well I'm here," she responded stiffly.

Luckily for him, he had spent his time wisely and had practised and performed to his snake summoning, Aoda, his words. "Thank you for coming," he let out softly. She huffed in response.

"What did you want to say?" she asked sharply, still not meeting his gaze. He studied her as she looked into the night sky, searching for the moon, counting the stars. But now that she was here, she was the only light he could look at. He wanted to feel her body against his, and count the constellations that freckled her back.

He knew what he had to say, he needed to tell her: "I'm sorry-"

"Is that all?"

"Let me finish," he insisted. "I'm sorry. Maybe it's all in my head, but I don't want Sarada to suffer anymore than she has to. I still stand by that... But I, I know I'm the one that burned us down. What I said... About your parents, I was out of line. That's not what I meant, I'm sorry that I hurt you...My words shoot to kill when I'm mad, I have a lot of regrets about that."

He counted the creases on her forehead and moved his arm until pinky fingers brushed against each other with only dust and broken bricks in between acting as the only physical barriers. Although he would have to work harder to remove the rest of the barriers, he knew. "I know how much pain I've caused you... and not just now. From the beginning of us... when we were still kids who knew nothing. I'm sorry about that too... I shouldn't have knocked you out and left you on that bench. I punished you with silence when you-"

"Sasuke. That was a long time ago. I don't care about that anymore," her voice was strangely sincere as he swore she was still mad at him. She looked down at their hands so close to each other. "Let's focus on the present."

He blinked, surprised she didn't want to hear of his apologies from so long ago... He had thought she had wanted to hear him finally say how he truly felt about that night that broke them for the first time. "I guess... I picked up your rambling habit," he joked. And that was when she finally looked at him. Her eyes were red and were filmed with tears that threatened to escape. Her furrowed brows spoke to him to continue.

"Sakura, I... I don't want to do this anymore. I don't want to lose this with you-"

"And what exactly is 'this'?"

He finally placed his hand over hers, and she didn't tug away. "You know what 'this' is," he whispered. "We had something so special. I don't want to throw it away."

She studied his face, searching for the sincerity behind his words, behind his face. "It's always been my fault, I know. Please don't go, Sakura... You mean so much to me I can't stand it, Sakura!" Sakura's eyes widened as she heard her own words from so long ago reflected back at her; the mirror was blurry, and not quite the exact same reflection, but she could see through it anyway. She understood his words and that was translated by her tears finally releasing.

He knew by the fountain on her face that she understood his words. But he desperately needed her to speak her words and reciprocate it back. Please, Sakura. He wanted her to tell him that she was still his, to comfort him and tell him they'll be fine. Rather, he wanted to tell her to tell him beautiful lies that this wasn't all his fault, that she still wanted him after all of this, even though he has broken her heart time and time again. But his words choked and dissipated at his throat, and he couldn't release them. A flurry of leaves danced around them, brought to them by a gust of wind that left her hair come out of its place and stroke his tender face. Mismatched eyes and viridian drowned into each other, searching for their lost lover in a labyrinth full of darkness as they also searched for the daylight. He broke the silence by saying, "Sakura. I won't stop loving you - I can't! How can I... how can I fix this... Please. Meet me halfway." All he got was her face crumpling under the moonlight. So he continued, "Even if the world was to tear us apart, my heart would still belong to you. And that would never change. I know I don't say it enough, but I had hoped you had heard it in the silence and when we're around each other, but I, I love you, Sakura. I need you. My heart will always find you no matter where I go..."

She buried her face in her other hand as she grasped desperately for control over her breathing as her body violently shook with each burst of tears. He squeezed the hand that sat beneath his own and hoped she knew what it meant. I'm sorry I always make you cry. He squeezed her again, and by this time she had regained some sort of composure and had started to dry her tears with the hem of her dress.

She closed her eyes for a bit, and Sasuke counted the seconds that passed before she opened them again to meet his gaze. Flecks of mascara were scattered under her eyes but she was still as radiant as the sun, and still the warmest thing to look upon. "And what about Sarada?" she asked in a hushed whisper.

He forced himself to not look away as he slowly said the next words, "You know how that is. I love her more than I do you, if that's even possible. She stole my heart when she was just a flicker of light in your stomach-"

"Not this 'light' nonsense again. Sarada won't stop talking about the light emitted from the sun and other objects orbiting around the heavens-"

She stopped when she heard him chuckle and apologise for the hundredth time. It was now that she released her hand from under his and stroked his face with the same hand. She then moved her hand behind his head and brought his forehead so it was touching hers and whispered to him, "Oh, Sasuke. How did it all become like this? We're such a mess."

"It's my fault," he whispered back.

"It is," she agreed. "It really is. You're an idiot. And I hate you." His eyes widened, this wasn't the confession he wanted - or expected - from her. "I hate you. I hate you. You drive me so mad, I hate that I love you, even after all this time. Why do you do this to me, Sasuke-kun? Why do you always hurt me?" He felt her tears trickle down as it fell on his lap. She took a deep straggly breath in before continuing, "I love you so much, and I hate you for i-" He silenced her with lips locking onto each other. Their tongues fought for dominance, but she was winning and he allowed her. He allowed himself to fall back to her, and he traced the Uchiha crest on her back with his index finger, soft hair coming in between as he did so. She finally pulled away and then fell into his lap.

"What kind of mother does it make me for allowing my child to have an absent father?" she asked someone but no one.

"Sakura, I know you have enough love for the both of us. So please, don't think it makes you any less of a mother because it doesn't. If anything, it's me who should be worrying about my worth as a father," he consoled.

She touched his face as she looked up at him. "But you're doing this for her, I know. I guess I've know it all along... But it's so hard to accept."

He held the hand that was caressing his face in his and kissed it. "If I knew there was another way... But I don't. I don't want Sarada to be tainted by me. You're full of such-" he desperately searched for a word that didn't have to do with 'light' to convey his feelings "-purification and innocence. I know she'll grow up to be a beautiful soul like you, under your guidance. I dread to think what could become of her if I continue to come and go out of her life like I do... it must be so confusing for her. I just want to put an end to her misery."

She pulled his head down and their lips met once again. They had met halfway. Her kiss still lingered on him as they both searched for air. "Darling," she breathed out. "I'm sorry I was so angry-"

"You had a right to be. You're her mother after all."

"I know but, it wasn't all on you. I should have heard you out. I should have listened-"

"Sakura, you don't need to apologise."

"Stop interrupting me!" she scolded. He bit back a smile, but she noticed and she pouted. And he knew that they had found themselves again. "Sasuke-kun," she tried again. "I'm sorry too. And I want you to know that I'll always be here by your side waiting... But if you ever change your mind about Sarada, I know she'll be waiting too."

"Thank you... Sakura."

They stared at each other for a few more moments lovingly, longingly. The spell was broken when Sakura sat up and started rummaging around her medic jacket's pockets. "Sakura, what are you doing?" he asked, having regained his stoic expression he wears around everyone else who wasn't family.

"Ah! Here it is!" She held his hand and fit it through a black fingerless glove. "It fits!" she squealed.

He raised an eyebrow at her. She answered his unspoken question, "It's Sarada's birthday present for you. She kept going on and on about how she remembers your hands being really rough against her cheeks, so she made me buy this for your birthday."

Sasuke looked down at the fingerless glove and his heart was engulfed in warmth. He was so blessed with his two girls. "Ah," he said. "Tell her..." He didn't know what message he should request to be sent to Sarada, or if a message should be sent at all.

"It's okay, Sasuke-kun. I understand. I won't tell her anything. To be honest, I think she's already forgotten. She's as forgetful as you."

He heard the accusation is her remark and he look dumbfounded at her. "Have I... have I missed our anniversary again?" he asked, his voice low with caution and embarrassment.

"No... it's tomorrow actually..." she answered.

He had understood the meaning behind her words that went unspoken. She had meant You really had to ask? He apologised with a kiss on her forehead. And then mumbled to her, "I know this is sudden, but I know a village near Konoha where we can get married again, renew our vows I mean, even though we didn't make any the first time. It'll only take an hour to travel, so we could go now and-"

She placed a hand on his chest, her fingers stroking the buttons of his waistcoat. "We don't need to do that," she whispered. "Because, even if you forget, I know how much I mean to you. And we have the rest of our lives to confess vows to each other. So... you don't need to worry. Because as you know, I love you, Sasuke-kun. I always have and I always will. And nothing could ever change that."

He brought her head towards his chest and they lay on a mattress of rubble under the starry sky. He asked her, "When do you need to pick Sarada up?" She responded with, "She's with Karui, having a sleepover with ChouChou. So I'll pick her up tomorrow morning."

"Who?"

"They're Cho- oh, it doesn't matter," she giggled into his chest, and the cracks in his heart slowly came towards each other, ready to close. Everything wasn't okay, but, the future ought to be bright - and he would do what he could to ensure it would be.

A/N: How many Taylor Swift references did you count?

Leave a review! I want to know if you got whiplash from this emotional rollercoaster throughout this chapter. Did I break your heart at any point? Please tell me I did lol.

There should only be about three more chapters left and I'm done. But I may not be able to update as regularly now which is why I've given birth to like 3 chapters or something in such a short time span.