Chapter 21 – All Too Familiar
"I got you some things at the store this morning," Rosalie said with a friendly smile the moment Irina was otherwise distracted.
It had been roughly two weeks since our encounter with the lone zombie in the grocery store, and since then, there was a definite change between Rosalie and Irina. I could see the cracks forming between them, and I couldn't help but hope their relationship would break irrevocably. If I could just open Rosalie's eyes to who Irina truly was, a fucking lunatic, I didn't have a doubt she would help me get home.
"What is all this?" I asked confused as I looked through the bag Rose had given me.
"I happened to see prenatal vitamins as I was browsing the medications, and I know how important they are for you and the baby's health, so I grabbed a few bottles. Oh, and those are some maternity clothes. I'm sure your pants are getting too tight by now."
"I just don't button them anymore," I told her before lifting my shirt to show her my rounded belly hanging over my unfastened jeans.
"Well, these should be more comfortable for you. I hope I got the right size. I wanted to start stocking up on baby gear, but Irina said we didn't have room yet. Hopefully we will get to wherever we are going to settle soon, and then we can really shop. All of the stores are still full of stuff like that. Cribs, baby swings, rockers, and all those little adorable baby clothes. I figured we should get a stroller too. Babies like going for walks, so…" She stared at me for a moment, and must have seen my lack of enthusiasm. "Bella look, I know this isn't the most ideal situation to bring a baby into, but I am excited, and I hope you can be too eventually. We will make sure your baby is safe. I would die to protect it; I hope you know that."
"You must really like kids," I said, not believing her protective words had anything to do with my baby in particular.
"I do. I have three nieces and a nephew…. Well, I had them. I guess they are no longer alive – or well, they are… but not. It's all so confusing with the way the virus is. People are still alive, but not in the sense that they were before. It feels like they're dead, but I'm proof people can come back, right?" she asked emotionally.
"Yeah, people can come back, but it seems many of the infected have already died out, and I don't think we will find a way to spread the cured blood on a mass scale in time to save the majority of them."
"I know, but we may be in a position to save at least a few more people in the future. We just never know what tomorrow will bring."
"That's true," I agreed. "And who knows, if you love kids so much, maybe someday you'll have one of your own," I told her, which I knew would be impossible in her current relationship, but when Rose balked at my suggestion, it wasn't because of Irina.
"I don't think I'll ever be able to have a baby," she said despondently. "I haven't… I haven't menstruated since I've been cured. I thought maybe it was due to stress, but I'm not so sure anymore. What if… what if the virus makes people sterile? Even if we manage to find a way to cure the entire population, our species could die out due to a lack of being able to reproduce."
I sighed. "We really don't know anything about the virus at this point. I hope that's not the case, but if so…"
"We just need to make the best of what we have," she finished for me with a smile. "Your baby will be the joy of our lives," she added before getting up and going outside to where Irina was.
Despite my hatred for her involvement in my kidnapping, Rosalie and I actually got along fairly well with all things considered. However, after her words about my baby being her joy, I couldn't help but become suspicious of her motivations. What if Rosalie wasn't just a helpless victim of Irina's manipulation the way I previously considered her? At that point, I wouldn't have been surprised if they only took me so they could have a baby to raise together. Perhaps they didn't plan on keeping me alive beyond the birth at all.
Irina was right when she said it would be too dangerous for me to set out on foot alone, but the alternative could be just as threatening. I needed to stop being resigned as the victim; I had to find a way to save myself.
Since the moment I realized I had been kidnapped, I had been tirelessly trying to figure out how to get myself home, but now it seemed more urgent than ever. I could only come up with a few bad ideas, so I resorted to moving forward with one that seemed a little less risky than the others.
"So, I was thinking about what comes after the birth," I said to Rosalie on another rare occasion where Irina wasn't hovering. "When the baby is born, what if we can't find any formula that's not expired?"
"What do you mean?" she asked confused.
"Well, I don't know much about babies, but I did happen to grab a can of formula the last time I was in a store, and its expiration date had already passed. Plus, with babies' stomachs being super sensitive, whatever water we use to mix in could make the baby sick. I mean, bottled water sitting in plastic containers for so long; I just can't see how that could be good."
"No, it wouldn't be. You really need to nurse. I mean, some babies have a hard time latching, but we can fight through that. We can find you teas and oatmeal that can help with your milk production too."
I nodded. "So, you think Irina will allow me to nurse?"
Rosalie was clearly taken aback by my words. "Why wouldn't she?"
"She implied that I wouldn't be allowed to be alone with the baby, because she is worried I'd run away with it. In fact, she told me I was lucky if I even got to hold it much."
Rosalie gasped. "She said that to you?"
"Yeah, so I was just a little worried about it. How will I be able to feed it if I can't even hold it?"
Everything I was telling Rosalie was a lie. Irina and I never even spoke about the baby other than the falsified accusations she made about the guys and the baby's future. A part of me hated stooping to Irina's level of manipulation, but those bitches deserved far worse. The way I saw it, it was a more humane alternative to the murder I desperately wanted to commit on them. My goal was to create doubt in Rosalie's easily malleable mind, and hope her loyalty to Irina cracks.
That night I couldn't help but smile to myself as I heard the two of them fighting. Did they honestly not realize how thin the wall was that separated our sleeping areas?
"I never said that!" Irina nearly shouted. "That bitch is playing you, and you are just falling into it. How stupid can you be?"
"I guess pretty stupid since I'm always believing everything you say, even when it doesn't make sense!" Rosalie retorted. "I feel like everyone that I've met since this damn virus spread has done nothing but lie to me. I don't know who or what to believe anymore."
"You're supposed to believe me. I'm your girlfriend. We love each other."
"Why would Bella lie about those things?" Rosalie pressed. "Nothing makes any sense."
"She lied because she is trying to cause a rift between us so she can make her way back to those monsters. Rosalie, I need you to believe me when I tell you that those men were monsters. They want to hurt the baby. We have to protect it, even if it means protecting it from its mother. She doesn't know what the hell she is trying to do. Edward has her so brainwashed."
"I just hate this," Rosalie said emotionally. "It's not right keeping a pregnant woman in a chain. It's not right keeping anyone in a chain but this is just inexcusable. We have to figure something else out."
"If she would just behave herself, we wouldn't have to keep her in that chain," Irina told her softly, which of course, was another manipulation tactic. Rosalie didn't respond well to being yelled at; speaking gently to her was the best way to gain her trust. Irina knew that, and that was what I planned to do moving forward as well. If I was always kind and gentle and that fucking bitch still didn't let me off the chain, Rosalie would have to open her eyes a little more.
The following morning was the beginning of my 'kill them with kindness' plot. My pleases and thank yous were odd to them at first; Irina would mostly roll her eyes, while Rosalie would always smile back and tell me "You're welcome."
The moment I felt my baby kick for the first time was bittersweet. I had been feeling little flutters for a while, but was never quite sure if it was the baby or gas, but this was a definite kick. It was a moment I had been waiting for since I first discovered I was pregnant, but it was also just one more painful reminder that Edward was missing everything. Somehow, I managed to suck up my anger and bitterness and put on a fake smile for Rosalie.
"Oh my gosh, feel this," I told her with as much excitement as I could muster. I grabbed her hand and placed it on my stomach so she could feel the tiny baby movements. "There! Did you feel that?"
"Oh wow!" Rosalie said with immediate tears filling her eyes. "It's really moving. It's so amazing."
She kept moving her hand around my belly to try to feel more, but Irina swooped in and pushed her hand away so she could try to feel it for herself.
"I don't feel anything," Irina said bitterly.
I wanted to tell her that the baby must sense evil, but I kept that likely fact to myself. "Maybe it went to sleep," I told her as friendly as possible.
Over the next few weeks, the baby's movements became more pronounced, and I felt myself diving deeper into an unexpected depression. My goal was for Rosalie to turn on Irina or for them both to trust me so I could have enough freedom to escape, but the longer it took, the more I began to accept that I wasn't going to make it home before the baby was born. It was a hard thing to consider.
"So, do you know anything about childbirth?" I asked Rosalie one evening. "Pete was an EMT and we were planning for him to help me, but now…"
"Well, I do know some," she said with a smile that was meant to be encouraging. "I'm a nurse so I went through all that in school, it's just not my area of specialty. Once the baby is born, I will be able to get its airway clear and all that. I told Irina we should go to a hospital and take some of the NICU equipment, just in case something was to go wrong."
My first thought was that it was a bad idea – a hospital of any kind would be crawling with the infected. Then again…
"So, are we going to do that?" I asked hopefully. "I mean, we should probably do it soon. If the baby comes early, it will need that extra support. Do you really think we can transport all that stuff?"
"It may take a few trips, but hopefully. We will need a push cart or something since the equipment is heavy. And we will need a generator to power it all, which shouldn't be a problem to find. We should probably get a trailer or something for the back of the motorhome to load it all in, and then go somewhere remote in case you labor into the night. The last thing we need is a zombie attack while you're giving birth."
"So, the sooner we get all of this, the better," I pressed.
"Yeah. I'll talk to Irina and tell her we need to find a hospital ASAP."
"Thank you, Rosalie," I said sincerely.
It took a few more hours of late night arguing on their part, but Irina eventually agreed to go to a hospital. The biggest obstacle I was going to face now was trying to convince them to let me stay outside as they went in and hopefully got eaten. I had watched Rosalie hotwire the motorhome enough that I was sure I could probably do it myself – I just needed the opportunity.
As we headed towards the closest town, I began to get nervous. My plan to get my captors attacked could very well backfire and result in my own demise, but I needed to stay focused. If I had any hope to get back to Edward before the baby was born, I needed to do it soon.
After stopping at a gas station to refill the gas and water in the motorhome, we drove around the relatively big town and searched for a hospital.
"I don't think I'll ever get over seeing all the destruction in places like this," Rosalie said while staring out her window.
"That's why we keep to the more rural areas," Irina responded.
It took a while of driving through the town, but eventually we spotted street signs that directed us to a hospital. Coincidently, we did find a trailer we could use along the way, and after hooking it up, we followed the route to the hospital.
"Ok, we stay where the sunlight is shining through the windows. No dark spaces, got it?" Irina instructed after parking in the hospital parking lot.
Rosalie and I both nodded, so we disembarked the motorhome, and I immediately began forcing myself to tremble.
"What's wrong?" Rosalie asked concerned.
"Hospitals have always terrified me," I lied. "I'm not sure if I can do this," I added while squatting down just next to the motorhome back tire and pretending to hyperventilate.
"Stop with the theatrics and let's go inside!" Irina demanded, calling my bluff.
"I can't," I maintained.
Irina argued, cussed, and threatened me for the next fifteen minutes or so, before Rosalie finally managed to get through to her.
"She's scared, Irina; I know how it feels to be so scared of something you can't move. It's not her fault."
"Oh, come on, she's faking it!" Irina shouted. "It's pathetic. Besides, we are doing this for her! How is it fair she stays out here away from danger?"
"We are doing this for the baby," Rosalie countered. "We are all going to have to work together to keep that little one safe. It's probably better Bella stays out here anyway. If we have to make a quick exit, we could go faster without her."
Irina finally agreed to let me stay outside, but she insisted on chaining me to a bench in the parking lot.
"No funny business," she warned me sternly.
"I'm chained up. What could I possibly do?" I asked her bitterly.
The moment they disappeared through the broken glass doors of the hospital; I began trying to escape my chain. I hoped they would stumble on a horde inside and get attacked, but I needed to free myself if I even had a hope of escaping that town before nightfall.
"Damn it!" I shouted after unsuccessfully attempting to squeeze the chain down past my hips.
She had secured it with a standard lock, so I looked around hoping to find something to break it with. I saw a good size rock, but after stretching as far as possible, it was beyond my reach. Everything was beyond my reach, so I did the only thing I could think of and started rocking the bench in the hope of breaking it from the ground. Thankfully, the bolts that held it there were corroded, and the bench began to loosen with my movements.
With a few more strong jerks, I was able to lift one end of the bench from the ground, but the chain was wrapped between the metal bars. The only way I was going to free myself was to put the lock under the lifted end, and basically jump on it.
The first time I did it, the lock dented. It dented in such a way that using the key to open it would be impossible. If I couldn't actually break it, then I was going to be in deep shit.
And then deep shit found me…
"What the hell?" I mumbled as I noticed movement out of the corner of my eye. I turned to see what it was, half expecting to see a stray dog or something, but it turned out to be so much worse.
The figure was hunched over, but when it stood and looked right at me, I knew it was an infected. It was standing in the shadows, so I felt okay since I was out in the sun, but then I heard the thunder.
"Holy fuck," I said slowly as I watched the thing take a step towards me. I hadn't even noticed the cloud cover before that moment, but remembering the attack by the infected deer, I knew they could come out into the indirect light.
The thing moved slowly, but its direction was clearly towards me.
"Shit, shit, shit," I repeated as I continued to attempt to break the lock with the bottom of the bench.
I tried to remain calm and focus, but with every failed attempt, my panic escalated.
When the monster stepped into the parking lot, it picked up its pace, and so did I.
"Come on!" I screamed at the lock as I hit it again.
There was another rumble, but this time it wasn't from the thunder. I knew others were coming, and by the all too familiar screaming in the distance, I knew it was going to be a lot of them. I didn't think it was possible to move any faster, but somehow, I did. I found some reserved strength deep within and I slammed that bench as hard as possible onto the lock and finally broke it open.
I was still trying to untangle myself from the chain when the zombie was closing in on me. My adrenalin was pumping, and the swooshing of blood behind my ears drowned out all other noise. The monster was right on top of me as I pulled the last loop of chain off of me. I expected to feel the sharp grasp of its teeth, but suddenly there was a loud clunk and it fell to the ground by my feet.
I looked up in shock and saw Rosalie standing there with some sort of metal instrument in her hands.
"We need to move!" she yelled at me.
I nodded and finally got myself fully free from the chain and that was when I saw a horde filing out of the hospital in waves.
"Go, go, go!" Irina shouted, so the three of us started running towards the motorhome. We were only a few yards away when we stopped dead in our tracks, and watched in horror as the thing was swarmed by zombies from behind, crushing it like a tin can.
We didn't have time to discuss or strategize, so we just began running in the opposite direction.
The zombies I had encountered previously were inhumanely fast, however these ones seemed slower. I could only assume it was due to the small amounts of UV cutting through the clouds, or perhaps because they were all damn near starved and low on energy. Whatever the reason for their fractionally slower pace, I was grateful. It gave us a chance.
But we couldn't run forever.
"I can't…" As much as I tried, I was completely out of breath and feeling like I was going to faint.
"Come on, Bella. You have to keep going," Rosalie tried encouraging me.
"Rose, leave her!" Irina shouted as she ran ahead of us.
Rosalie grabbed my hand and pulled me along with her, but we weren't going fast enough and I could feel myself beginning to give up.
"Come on, Bella," Rose repeated. "Think about your baby." She paused and looked around. "Irina, go to the ambulance!" she called to her.
There was an ambulance across the lot, and Rose must have had some sort of idea, but it was just so far, and the monsters were closing in on us. The thundering of the horde echoed through me, increasing my panic.
"I can't… I can't…" I tried saying, but my chest was tight, and I was so short of breath that I didn't even have enough air left in me to speak.
"You can. Keep pushing forward," Rose insisted as she continued to drag me.
Since Irina was a large distance ahead of us, she had to double back towards us to get to the ambulance, and when she caught up, she had a lot to say.
"Rose, she's not going to make it. She is slowing you down and we are all going to die because of her ass. Leave her! The others will attack her, and it will give us a chance to escape."
"Irina, have you lost your mind? We are not leaving her!" Rosalie shouted back as she pressed on.
We ran a few more steps, and Irina shot past us again, but then she glanced back which caused me to glance back as well. The monsters were only a couple yards behind, so Irina slowed just enough for us to catch up to her.
"It has to be done, Rose, leave her now!" she told Rosalie before attempting to pull her hand off of my arm so she would abandon me.
It all happened so fast, but the next thing I knew, Rosalie punched Irina in the face, thus knocking her to the ground. She hesitated for a moment, but then she tightened her grip on me and we continued running for the ambulance. Rosalie may not have looked back, but I sure as hell did. Just as Irina had predicted, the fall of one of us did cause the horde to slow. They overtook her like locusts, and then she was gone. I felt no sympathy for her. Had she had it her way, it would have been me and my baby left to die.
Unfortunately, they were only distracted by Irina for a few moments before they refocused on us. By some miracle, we made it to the ambulance and it was thankfully unlocked. We jumped in and Rosalie got right to work trying to hotwire it, but that was when I saw the keys on the dash.
"Here," I said, handing them to her.
"Thanks."
She started it and slammed on the gas, plowing through the horde as she went. It almost seemed like she was aiming for the spot Irina had fallen in, and to further confirm my suspicion, she hit the breaks and threw it in reverse and plowed through that same group again.
"We can't have her leading them back home," she explained emotionlessly before putting it back in drive and speeding away.
The horde followed us, but the ambulance was too fast for them and eventually they gave up. We drove straight out of town and kept going until we found the shelter of rural obscurity once again…