Hi everyone!:)

I finally have the next chapter finished! I can't wait to share with you what's going to happen to Kira now that she saw Zuko again!:D I hope you'll enojy this chapter! Let me know what you think!

I do not own Avatar The Last Airbender, nor its characters. The only characters that I own are my OCs.

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Freedom and Insecurities

Kilara

It first took me several seconds to understand that the Fire Lord didn't only look exactly like Zuko but that he had to be Zuko.

Ozai couldn't have the exact same scar, where his hair and eyebrow was also burnt, and his ear, too.

Besides, despite the harsh scar and angular features, the man in front of me was still clearly a teenager. And even if he was adult, he'd never be old enough to be the father of two teenagers.

But how was this possible? Why was Zuko Fire Lord? Was I dreaming? Was Ozai dead? The war? What was happening?

But I couldn't feel safe, simply because this was Zuko. Maybe he had an evil twin that looked exactly like him, and this was Kozu in front of me, or someone. Or Zuko was still angry with me for saying all these things I'd had to say to drive him away. Maybe his time here with his father and sister changed him. Maybe he was different in a bad way.

He stared intently at me, the sides of his eyes dropping, as his mouth opened slightly. "Ki... Kilara?"

Since Suki no one had called me that, and certainly no one had ever said my name like this for some time. Without disdain and contempt. Zuko's 'Kilara' felt like a caress, like something only someone who cared about me would say.

I leaned a little closer, wanting to make absolutely sure that this was Zuko. But I couldn't ask him something.

So I nodded carefully.

He slowly reached out with his hands and held them open for me to grasp. I took them, and then he pulled me up. I wasn't very steady on my feet due to the drug and my injury, but Zuko held me. I took in a sharp breath, and although he didn't smell like a tea shop anymore, and his robes had a heavy, fresh sent, and the armour smelled of metal, somehow I knew then that this was definitely Zuko. You can fake appearances, but you cannot fake the smell of a person's skin.

I had never really perceived his scent, had never thought much about it, and even though I couldn't say what it was, it catapulted me back to my room in Ba Sing Se, to the chaise longue in our basement, to the kitchen in his apartment, to the floor of the hut in the mountains, and to Uncle Aiguo's kitchen. I closed my eyes for a moment.

"Why is her name in the documents Liwei?" Zuko asked Saburo and the guard.

Saburo looked like he wanted to hit himself, but he composed himself quickly again. "Princess Azula's orders."

"Azula imprisoned her?" Zuko wanted to know. He sounded shocked.

"No, Your Majesty. The girl was caught under a false name. Princess Azula found out about it, but ordered the documents not to be changed."

"What does Azula have to do with it?" Zuko murmured, more to himself.

I would have liked to answer him.

Next to me, I felt like Zuko drew himself to his full height, and although he was still rather short for his age, it seemed like he had grown a little since I had last seen him. Or I had shrunk.

"I want a full report on her. I want every document, every file. How, why, by whom she was captured, and in which prisons she had been," he ordered.

Saburo looked like he had bitten into a sour lemon, as he nodded stiffly. "Your Majesty needs anything else about the prisoner? Like I said, she is highly dangerous."

"No, that is all. You're dismisses" said Zuko, before he turned slightly around. "Katara?"

Swallowing, I watched how the guard turned to leave, and then after looking at me, Saburo turned around, too, walking away, out of the throne room. A heavy weight lifted off my chest.

A girl my age in a light blue tunic with dark pants underneath walked down the steps next to the throne. She had hip long brown waves and large ocean blue eyes. She was beautiful.

She stopped in front of Zuko. "Yes?"

"Could you please take Kilara to the infirmary? I want her thoroughly checked through. So, maybe you can also use your waterbending. Er, and then maybe you could bring her to a room next to yours? Whatever one she likes."

I looked up at him. He had a frown on his face, but he didn't look like he had any evil intention towards me. So maybe he hadn't changed, or at least not much since I last saw him.

And what is more, Katara? Wasn't that the name of the waterbender who had trained the Avatar? And Zuko had just said she could waterbend! And Katara was definitely a Water Tribe name! She wore blue! She had blue eyes! I've never before seen a person so typically Water Tribe!

But how was it that she was here? Maybe she was a war prisoner and had to serve the Fire Lord now?

But she didn't wear any shackles, and her face looked nice and friendly. Genuinely caring, even.

"Of course," she answered Zuko and stepped closer to me.

"Hello, Kilara. I've heard a lot about you from Zuko."

I blinked at her. She called him Zuko. She couldn't be a servant.

"I'm Katara, a friend. Is it okay for you to come to the infirmary with me?" She held a hand out towards me.

I stared at her for several moments. Then I looked back at Zuko.

"It's okay. Katara is a good friend. You'll be treated, and I'll check on you later, okay? There are just a few more war prisoners standing trial today."

I frowned. Standing trial? Was that what I was doing here?

But if I was going to be given a room in the palace, then... Was I free?

Zuko carefully let me go, and Katara pulled my arm through hers. I looked back at Zuko, my eyes wide.

He nodded and smiled reassuringly. My heart pounded.

I should probably listen to reason. Katara was a waterbender. She couldn't be on the Fire Nation's side and even if, she was on Zuko's side. And Zuko had a conscience. He had doubts. He was good.

So I followed Katara.

Zuko

Kilara.

I couldn't believe that I had finally found her.

It still felt a little unreal to me. Like a dream, so I feared I would wake up any second.

I could barely concentrate during the rest of the war prisoner trials. I still had to deal with the crimes Kilara apparently committed, but that could wait.

First, she had to be treated.

The way she had looked had shocked me. Her hairline had been short and stubbly, set too far behind on the left side due to the burn on her forehead. And there was a round, padded, pink scar on her throat.

But what had really shocked me was how pale she'd looked. And how weak. She was thinner, and her eyes hadn't shone with enthusiasm and life the way they had back in Ba Sing Se.

I had memorised the man who had brought her here. If he had done anything to her...

But for several hours, I could only speculate and listen to other cases, until it was almost dinner time, and my stomach already grumbled.

I directly marched to the infirmary. First, I wanted to talk to Dr. Gozen.

She was just about to leave, when I entered her room.

She didn't seem surprised at seeing me. "Fire Lord Zuko." She bowed.

"Dr. Gozen." I gave a little bow back. "I have questions concerning a patient you had today."

"The girl who was here with Master Katara?"

I nodded. "How... was she? Physically. I mean, where there any more injuries?"

The doctor raised her eyebrows. "The only person I had ever seen with so many scars was the only survivor of an explosion."

I sucked in a breath.

Dr. Gozen sighed. "She had many minor and some major burns, they are all healed, but scarred. The worst injury she has is on her right leg. The muscle in her calf was cut out somehow, I guess. She can't walk properly, and through the scar on her throat her vocal cords were damaged. Master Katara said she might be able to heal that, but for now, the girl can't talk."

My blood froze. I stiffened. This couldn't be.

"B-but how? Can't you do something?"

She raised her eyebrows. "The only thing I can do is give her physical exercise so that she may walk again. I guess she could need a sleeping draught in the future, as she's probably also suffering from mental damages."

My eyes widened. "Damages?"

"Trauma, Your Majesty."

I blinked. "Trauma? How?"

The doctor looked at me as if I were a complete idiot. "When you suffer through so many injuries, which were probably given to her in prison, then you have to heal your mind sometimes, too."

"So she'll need a doctor for the mind?"

"Yes. I know someone if you'd like her to heal."

"Yes. That would be great. Thank you. Do you know where Katara brought her?"

"To the fifth storey, I think. You said she should be close to her."

I nodded. "Yes. Thank you."

I wondered if I should write a letter to Suki that we had found Kilara, but I guessed that Katara had already done that, so I went straight to the fifth storey.

Katara, Toph, Suki, Aang, and Sokka all had their rooms in this storey. Now, it were only Katara and Toph.

I asked the guards in which room the new girl was, and they pointed to a door next to Katara's. It would overlook the lake, too.

I knocked, but no one answered me. I frowned, but then the door suddenly opened. Just a little. A large, turquoise eye stared at me.

"Kilara?"

She nodded.

"May I come in?"

She furrowed her eyebrows and then looked around the corridor.

Was she searching for something?

The door opened further, and she vanished from the doorstep. I followed her in, but stayed close to the door. If what the doctor said was right and she had a trauma, then a Fire Nation person was probably not the best thing she liked to see.

"Er, where's Katara?"

Kilara pointed at the door.

Okay, this was going to be difficult. But Kilara seemed to have practice in talking without speaking.

She formed Katara's hair loopies at the side of her head, pointed at the door and pretended to write something in her hand.

"Katara left to get you something to write on?"

Kilara gave me a small smile and nodded. Then she sat down on a chair next to the small couch.

I didn't know why, but I was suddenly very nervous. I never had had to do with people who had suffered from a trauma.

I know that I had had a trauma myself after Ozai had burnt me, but I hadn't dealt with it in a healthy way. I had yelled a lot, and simply put all the questions about how a father could do that far, far away in my mind. In order not to face the ugly truth I had lied to myself for a long time.

Kilara eyed me in a wary way, and that made me even more uncomfortable. Normally it had been her saying something, or initiating an interaction. I wasn't used to do that.

"Is it okay if I sit down?" I asked and pointed at the chair opposite her.

She nodded slowly, but the nice smile on her face disappeared.

I sat down carefully and hoped I wouldn't startle her. "So, er... You look better!"

She frowned at me, and I quickly raised my hands.

"I meant than earlier. You-you're wearing something different and..."

Her lips pressed together, she nodded and made the hair loopies motion again.

I guess that was her sign for Katara.

Then she bent water out of a flower bouquet towards us and let it fly back and forth. Then she pointed at herself.

"Er... Katara waterbended for you?"

She gave me a dry look. Well, why should Katara waterbend for her. She was a waterbender herself. She rubbed her hand over her other arm.

"Ah, she washed you!"

Kilara nodded, and a smile appeared on her face again.

"Would you tell me how you washed yourself in prison?"

She frowned, and I could see her nostrils flare, but she bent the water into the shape of a bucket.

"And soap?"

An amused and sad smile appeared on her lips, as she shook her head.

Good. So no one had given her any soap. I would make sure that whoever had been responsible for her was not going to get any soap, either.

Well, and maybe fire them.

Frowning, I looked at her, at a loss for words. What was I going to say now?

Instead, she pointed to the crown of her head and then at me.

"The crown?"

She nodded.

"How it is that I'm Fire Lord?"

She nodded again.

My regal Fire Lord clothes began to be a little uncomfortable, and I wished I had gone to my room to change before coming here. But now that was done.

I sighed. "I don't know if you're going to believe that," I said lowly. Telling her, I had changed sides and helped the Avatar… Maybe she would think I only told her this, so that she would trust me again.

Maybe I should wait for Katara. Wait, Kilara had met Toph! I needed Toph here!

Quickly, I stood, but cringed when I noticed that Kilara had jerked back. "Er, excuse me a second. I need someone else's assistance to tell you that," I said and walked to her door.

I turned my head towards the guards in the corridor. "Find Toph and bring her here," I said. I had noticed that asking the guards to do something was mostly met with hesitation and confusion, so I thought a nicely uttered command would be better.

One of them bowed to me. "Yes, Fire Lord."

Closing the door again, I turned around to Kilara and saw that she hadn't moved at all. Her hands twitched, though, and her eyes kept darting to the windows.

Okay, first things first.

Slowly, I walked back, but instead of sitting in the chair, I got down on my knees in front of her. Her eyes widened.

"The most important thing for you to know is that although I'm Fire Lord, you still don't have anything to fear from me. I'm not your enemy. I won't hurt you or let you get hurt. And you won't go back to prison." I took a deep breath. "I never wished to harm you, and that hasn't changed."

She bit down on her lip, as she looked at me in an uncertain, but hopeful way.

"I know you don't want to be my friend anymore, but we are not enemies."

Her face contorted in a painful way and she shook her head.

"No, really!" I objected. "I won't harm you. And no one else here will. I…" Hm, maybe she didn't know about the end of the war. "The war is over, Kilara. The Fire Nation is retreating from the Earth Kingdom."

Her head snapped up, as she stared at me with wide eyes, her eyebrows furrowed. Her mouth formed 'What'.

Just then, it knocked again.

Kilara gave the door a suspicious look, but I spoke up anyway. I really needed Toph's or Katara's help.

"Come in!"

Fortunately, it was both of them.

"Sorry this took me so long," Katara started to say. "Oh, Zuko. You're here already."

I nodded.

Toph strode in and plopped down where I had sat before. "Hey, Kilara. Great to see you."

Kilara blinked in surprise.

"Well, I mean, feel you," Toph corrected herself. "After Suki told us what happened, we were all pretty worried. Mostly him, though. He went completely crazy." She put a foot on my back.

"I did not!" I huffed, and quickly stood so that her foot fell to the floor again. Annoyed, I sat down next to Toph, who simply grinned.

Kilara's brows were contorted in confusion, then she looked at Katara and stretched her arm out.

"Oh, right." Katara quickly handed her paper and a pen and then sat down next to me.

Kilara immediately began to write.

You know Suki?

The war is really over?

How come you two are here in the Fire Nation?

Why are you Fire Lord, Zuko?

She gave us a demanding look, which felt like balm to me. Like this, she looked a lot more like the friend I'd had.

"I think it's best to start from the beginning," Katara said. "My brother Sokka, the Avatar Aang and I were on Kyoshi last autumn. We passed it on our way from the South Pole to the Earth Kingdom. That's how we met Suki. Then, in spring we saw her again at Halfmoon Bay, when we went to Ba Sing Se to talk to the Earth King. We accompanied a family who had their passports stolen along the serpent's pass, and Suki came with us to make sure we all made it safely. She and my brother fell in love. Two months ago, there was a solar eclipse, during which firebenders can't firebend. We used the timing for an invasion of the Fire Nation, but Azula knew we were coming and wasted our time during the eclipse. She told my brother that Suki was a prisoner in a Fire Nation prison. And a few weeks ago, Sokka and Zuko went to the Boiling Rock to look for my father. He had been captured during the invasion. That's where they found Suki. They rescued her, and my father, too."

Kilara furrowed her brows, and looked at me.

You and Sokka?

"Oh, er, yeah… Um, we went there." I guess she wanted to know something else, but I didn't know how to say it.

Why?

I rubbed my neck. "Well, my father planned to use Sozin's comet to burn the entire Earth Kingdom down. Literally. And I didn't agree with that, so I left and found the Avatar and then…"

Kilara scribbled again hastily. The Avatar? Isn't he dead?

Katara gasped. "You didn't know Aang was alive? And about the end of the war?" She turned on me. "Zuko, your prisoners deserve to get some information!"

"I didn't know they weren't getting any!"

"Yes, Aang is alive," said Toph. She nodded at Katara. "Sweetness here had some special water and managed to heal him."

Kilara turned towards Katara, her eyes large and eyebrows raised. What water?

"From the spirit oasis in the North Pole."

Kilara nodded slowly.

So you turned against your father then?

I nodded. "Yes, well, I taught Aang firebending to help preparing him for the fight against Ozai. Aang stopped Ozai. Toph, Sokka, and Suki stopped the fleet of airships that would have burnt the Earth Kingdom down. And Katara stopped Azula."

Katara frowned at me. "You stopped her."

I raised an eyebrow. "As far as I recall, I was lying on the ground, while you chained her up."

"You would have won," Katara objected. "Azula acted against the rules. It was your victory."

Toph rolled her eyes. "How about you defeated her together?"

Azula is gone?

"She's in a prison at the moment," Katara answered.

Kilara seemed to slump in her seat. She leaned against the rest and bent her head back. My eyes widened, when I saw the rosy scar on her throat fully.

Then she suddenly frowned, and bent back down to write something. What about General Iroh?

"Uncle is fine," I said. "He freed Ba Sing Se from the Fire Nation on the day of Sozin's comet. He's practically in charge of the city now, because the Earth King hasn't been found yet."
"Aang, Suki, and Sokka are gone to find him," said Toph. "And could you please tell me what she's asking? I think you've forgotten that I can't read!"

I'm sorry.

"She apologises," Katara said.

"Don't apologise," Toph scoffed. "It's not like it's your fault that you can't speak."

Kilara cringed and bit down on her lip, looking at the ground.

Katara's eyes widened and she looked at me in an alarmed way. I grimaced, because I didn't know how to react or what to do.

Katara cleared her throat. "So, as you see, Zuko changed sides, Ozai and Azula are imprisoned, and the war has ended. Zuko is trustworthy and he's our friend. He even became Fire Lord by Fire Nation law."

Kilara looked at Katara in a searching way, then she stared at me for a few seconds. I pressed my lips together and looked back.

She frowned again.

"What?" I asked, feeling a little put off. Why was she staring like that?

Something's wrong with you. I can feel it.

Katara told Toph what Kilara had written down

I blinked. "Er… Well, I changed? Or… er, my firebending is different now, too."

No, it's your body. It doesn't feel how it used to.

Katara gasped and a red colour spread on her cheeks, as her eyes widened. She raised her eyebrows at me and squeaked.

"What?" asked Toph.

Kilara frowned at them.

I fidgeted in my seat. "Erm… Do you mean the water?"

I remembered how she had told me she could feel the water in my body, and even distinguish people that way. She had known when I had been in her garden without having to look.

She nodded.

"Katara says my chi paths are alternated. Maybe it's that?" I looked at Katara with raised eyebrows.

She twisted her mouth. "Wait. So this is not about you two having…?"

I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. "No, it's not that. Kilara…" I looked questioningly at her. She nodded. "She can feel the water in people's body. Or anywhere, I guess. Like Toph feels earth. My water feels probably different, because of the lightning."

Katara tapped her chin, thinking. "That could be. Although I wouldn't know, as I can't feel the water in your body, when I'm not healing you. And I didn't heal you before, so I don't know how your water felt before…"

"That's cool. I never met anyone else who could feel their element the way I do," Toph commented.

Kilara shrugged and leaned back.

Katara cleared her throat. "So, as you can see, Kilara, there is no need to be afraid here. We're all on the same side, and we want you to be better. And not longer imprisoned."

Kilara glanced at us, her eyes sharp, but not angry or afraid. Maybe cautious.

Katara smiled at her in a reassuring way, Toph was picking her toes, but agreeing, and I tried to look reassuring, too.

"By the way, how did you end up in prison?" Toph asked.

"She led a rebellion," Katara answered.

Toph whistled. "Sweet."

Katara shot me a look that seemed unhappy. I didn't really get it, but I thought there was something she needed to yell at me about.

Now, she clapped her hands, causing Kilara to jump, and quickly sank her hands again, her face clearly guilty. "Er, well, I thought I'd ask how you guys feel about dinner. We could have it here, or later, or outside. Whatever you feel like."

I swallowed, feeling starved, but looked at Kilara first. She was still biting on her lip and looking at the ground, her arms lying over her stomach, as if she was cold. Or as if she wanted to disappear.

I took a deep breath. "How about a simple Earth Kingdom dinner? Bread, cheese, sea fruits, and sweet pastries for dessert."

Katara frowned at me. "Don't you think we should eat something nicer? Something with more vitamins?"
Toph groaned.

I'd like what Zuko said. I've mostly only had rice porridge for the last weeks.

"Since Kilara agrees with me, this is what we're going to eat," I decided, grinning.

Katara was still frowning, but Kilara looked friendlier. She almost smiled at me, and I hoped she knew I had suggested this food, because it was typical food from Kyoshi Island, and Kilara had told me that this food was probably her favourite. I wanted her to feel good and comfortable, and I also wanted her to remember how we had been friends. Because that's what I intended for us to be, whether she liked it or not.

But I hoped she'd like it.

Kilara

We had dinner in my room, which I was grateful for. I didn't really want to go anywhere else now. The effect of the drug had worn off a few hours ago, and I felt my legs hurting again. Well, my arms and torso, too, but I was just pretty glad that I didn't have to walk anywhere.

The food was really good, and I felt so happy to taste anything more tasteful than rice porridge that I would have hummed all through the meal if I could.

It tasted differently than the bread and cheese from Kyoshi, but I appreciated Zuko's attempt to make me feel better.

I could barely wrap my head around what was happening. While I had been imprisoned, Zuko had changed his mind about the Fire Nation, betrayed his nation and helped the Avatar to defeat his father.

Standing trial in front of Ozai had been something I had feared for quite some time. I had felt repulsed at the sheer thought of meeting this horrible man, and I had known that I would not receive any mercy from him. I had felt it deep in my bones, the sureness of dying sooner rather than later.

Realising that this was not going to happen took me a while. I still hadn't fully understood it, so I shoved it to the back of my mind and simply enjoyed the food.

Toph, Katara, and Zuko told me about how they had tried to find me after Suki had told them about me. Zuko had recognised me from Suki talking about a waterbender friend with a twin brother who had grown up with her on Kyoshi. Since they hadn't been able to sneak into the capital, they had hoped that I would survive until after Sozin's comet. And as soon as Zuko had recovered from Azula shooting lightning at him (what I still couldn't really understand. I had thought she at least felt affection for him), he had started searching through prison documents with Suki's help. They hadn't been able to find me, because I had been documented under the name of Liwei.

I had thought it was good if no one knew my real name, but I think I wouldn't have stayed imprisoned that long if my real name had been written on the papers.

Katara tried to talk through the silences of dinner, seeming to be determined to fill it with something.

As far as I had come to known Zuko, I thought he didn't know what to say or how to act. And although Toph seemed like a brash person, I suspected her to be the same way. But I also didn't know what to do.

Dessert was fruit and chocolate pastries. I had to force myself to stop eating, because I knew that after not eating anything else besides rice porridge for weeks, apparently, I could easily get sick after eating so much.

It had really been almost six weeks that I had been in the capital prison. In some way, I had thought it hadn't been that long, but it still felt like it could have been years. It felt like a whole life sometimes, like a different world that I had finally escaped.

When Toph and Katara left, Katara told me that she was on the left to my room, if I needed anything.

I looked at the bed in this room with an odd sense of foreboding. I was pretty sure that I wouldn't be able to sleep. The bed would be too soft and too good smelling, and I would fear that this was all just a dream and that I would wake up any second to find myself in my prison cell with Saburo waiting to tell me about how his last torture meeting went.

Gratefully, I smiled at Katara and nodded.

It was odd seeing Zuko wearing so formal clothes. It was definitely weird seeing him wearing Fire Nation clothes. I hadn't ever seen that on him and the way his hair was all out of his face was strange, too.

I knew that he was Zuko, but I still expected him to act differently. He looked older like this, more like a serious man although he was still not tall enough for the average man.

He swallowed. "I'm going to leave, too, but I wanted to tell you something first."

I tensed.

He took a deep breath. "I know this is difficult and probably also weird for you. So I'm keeping back and I will respect your boundaries and wishes. But I don't know what happened to you. I can only imagine, and the only way I'll know is if you tell me. I won't push you to, but I'm here if you want to let me know. And what I imagine so far is that there were people who hurt you in prison. If you know anything about them, you can tell me who it was, and I'll make sure they'll be punished for it." He looked a little sheepish there. "Not just because of you, but hurting prisoners is normally against the law. And I can't imagine that you have done anything to deserve this." He straightened himself a bit. "I know you said you didn't want to be my friend anymore, but you were there for me once, when I was in a very bad place. I'll be there for you now. So, you know, let me know if there's something you need, or something I can do." He nodded to end his speech and got up.

At the door, he stopped again. "There should be some clothes in the wardrobe, if you want a sleeping gown. There will be someone knocking at your door tomorrow morning to either bring you breakfast or lead you to the breakfast hall. Whatever you prefer. Good night, Kilara." He opened his mouth as if to say something else, then looked like he was thinking and finally said "I'm glad I finally found you", before he turned around and left.

For a few moments, I stared at the door, my mind completely blank. I didn't really feel… real, I guess.

I should have thought about Zuko's words. About telling him what had exactly happened to me. About what Azula had made me do, why Zuko thought I hadn't wanted to be his friend. The rebellion, the fire, being imprisoned, watching people be tortured, and being tortured.

Because that's what had happened to me. I had been tortured.

I just wasn't ready to think about it that way.

But now, I didn't think any of that. I just frowned, when Zuko had left, asking myself why he had thought he needed to say that. Maybe he wanted to be overprotective. Or he needed to prove that he was not evil. Or it was all really just about returning the favour. He had talked to me about how he had got his scar, what his father had done to him, about what he suspected had happened to his mother, how his sister had been favorited by his father all the time, and how court had been to him in general. And I had listened and tried to make him feel more important. He had just talked sometimes.

Zuko wasn't a big talker, but he was good with emotional monologues.

I went into the bathroom to get ready for the night, looking around the huge room without feeling anything. I thought it was a huge room, larger than my old bedroom, but I didn't feel amazed or amused with what rich people needed. I just felt nothing.

After I had washed my face and brushed my teeth, I looked for something to wear for the night. All the clothes were red. It felt like I would be wearing blood on my skin. There were darker reds, almost brown, but that reminded me too much of the prison clothes that Katara had taken away with her. In the end, I settled on a light pink colour. It was friendly enough and did look more like strawberry yoghurt and not like blood.

I had been right. I wasn't able to sleep. The bed was too soft, the covers too warm. It was a warm night, and I had slept in the prison without a blanket for almost six weeks. I didn't need a blanket now. The four poster bed seemed threatening to me. Why was there fabric above me? Who needed that?

The complete silence of this storey freaked me out. I guessed there were more people still awake somewhere else, maybe servants were preparing things for tomorrow.

After sleeping to the clacking and creaking of metal uniforms and doors, the screaming of prisoners and the yelling of officers, the only sound I had now were the chirruping of bird cats.

Nothing felt right or good. This was so weird. I had thought, dreamed of freedom, of peace, of safety, and of a real bed for so long. Now that I had it, the prison didn't leave my mind.

Eventually, I fell asleep only to dream about the prison.

Saburo was crueller than usual, and he had brought his friend. I knew this was bad. And it was bad.

I don't know why my own screaming didn't wake me up.

My body hurt and I moved, I fought, I begged for an end, and I slapped the hands away…

"Kilara!" The hands were shaking my shoulders. "Wake up! You're dreaming!"

I sat up abruptly, panting, not knowing where I was or why.

My cheeks hurt and I felt tears falling from my eyes. Then I felt pain in my throat. I opened my mouth as a reflex, thinking I had something to cough out.

"It's okay," Katara whispered, her hand still on my shoulder. "It's okay."

I turned my gaze to her and knew where I was and why. My face was still contorted and I felt the dream rushing through me. It had felt real. I knew it hadn't happened, but it was in my head. It's as if it had happened. Maybe. Or not. I wasn't sure.

The tears didn't stop rolling down my face.

Katara bit her lip, before she quickly stood. "Can you wait a moment? I want to try something…"
I skidded a little further away from her and watched her as she walked into the bathroom. She came back with water around her hand.

"This is probably not the right moment, but I just heard your screams," she said to explain her behaviour.

Normally, I would have said 'What?' in a dumbfounded way, but I just widened my eyes in surprise. I had got so used to not speaking.

Katara smiled. "Yes, I knew there had been something when we had healed your throat together earlier. Healing together is not something I've ever done, so I wasn't sure. But I heard you! I just fear that your screams might have destroyed the progress," she added sheepishly. "Mind if we try again?"

I did not. And I was also very glad for not needing to tell her about my nightmare.

Instead, I felt Katara's presence in the water, her chi that was connected to it, and how she tried to use the water to heal me. I didn't work next to her, but tried to move my chi through hers to fuel it. I had never done that before, too, and it was an odd, but very powerful feeling.

She gasped. "Oh my! I can sense it. I know how and where you're injured!"

I felt it, too. It was really damage to my vocal chords. It wasn't only a cut, but thinking of the original wound, something had stuck in my throat, just millimetres from my aorta. It had almost severed my vocal chords, but they had kept together on a small string.

"How did that happen?" Katara whispered.

I grimaced, as I didn't really know, but then pointed my finger at my throat and made a probing motion.

Her eyes widened in shock. "Did that… Did that happen to you in prison?"

I shook my head.

She took a deep breath, obviously feeling relieved. Then she breathed again to focus her energy on healing again. "I think… I can do something. Kilara, can you try to not only weave your chi through mine, but to wrap around it, too?"

Closing my eyes, I concentrated on the water which surrounded my throat and my hand. I felt Katara's chi and wrapped it with mine.

"So…" she murmured. "Okay." Then I felt it. I felt our two chis pushing in through the scarred tissue, working with that what was still intact and getting it to expand, to push against the scar. My vocal chords widened again.

This was definitely one of the weirdest feelings I'd ever had. At the one hand, I felt glad, knowing I could be able to speak again, but on the other hand, it was such an invasion of my privacy and body, and then there was suddenly the nightmare in my head again, and I pushed Katara out.

She took her hand away from my throat and blinked at me in confusion. "Why did you stop?"

I pretended that it had hurt, wrapping my hand around my throat and grimacing.

"Oh. Well, I still think you could be able to say something again. Maybe you can try again tomorrow?"

I nodded.

"Well then, sleep well," she said, before she left.

I wasn't able to fall asleep again. I thought about the nightmare, shivering with disgust. Now, I pulled the blanket up again to shield me more from whatever was outside of this bed. Refusing to close my eyes, I laid awake, soon pushing the terrible dream away and trying to think of something nice.

Nanuk came to my mind. Nanuk and Dad. Mum. Uncle and Aunt.

Tears came to my eyes again, and I didn't even know why. Did I miss them? Did I want them with me now?

Probably.

I hugged the pillow, as I cried into it, my chest hurting and my throat becoming soar with tears. Once, I had started, it only became worse. My heart hurt. It really hurt, as if it was broken or crushed or ripped out of my chest. I cried more. Louder. I heard myself.

And I sounded hoarse, raspy, because I hadn't been able to use my voice for so long. I hadn't been able to tell the guards what I thought about them. I hadn't been able to reply to people, I hadn't been able to insult Princess Azula, let Saburo know my creative, sarcastic answers, and I hadn't been able to tell Zuko I didn't hate him.

I sounded awful. I didn't recognise my voice. It was the voice of a wounded animal, as far as I was concerned. A dying animal.

What had Saburo said? They called me The Lioness in Ba Sing Se? Because I had led the rebellion of the Armadillo Lion?

Well, the Lioness was dying. But I think she was already dead. I cried over her death.

I cried for me, and then, I just cried, because I had no one. None of the people who were here, did I want to have here. I wanted my mother to comfort me, my brother, my father. But there were only strangers and former friends here.

I couldn't feel safe here. I wanted to go home. I wanted to go home! I wanted to see my family! I needed to see them! Were they even fine? What had happened to them?

Thinking about telling Zuko that I wanted to leave for the Earth Kingdom was the only thing that calmed me down enough.

I think I fell asleep again, thinking of Nanuk's hugs.

Sleep didn't keep me company for long, because I woke up again before the sunrise. I think I was afraid of having another nightmare.

But I couldn't just keep lying in bed. I got up and walked to the bathroom to wash me. I rubbed furiously at my skin, and although I smelled like a flower shop, I still felt like the grime from the prison was still on me. The sweat and the dirt of the floor. None of that had gone off me with just water.

There was one other pink robe in the wardrobe, and I put it on again, hoping I would be able to ask for clothes that did not have the colour of blood.

Then I saw me in the mirror. It was the first time for almost two months. My hair had become longer, a little, but not much. It fell onto my forehead now, but still only grew tentatively where I had been burnt.

I looked skinnier than I remembered me looking, which was weird, as I had thought I hadn't lost any weight. I hadn't been starved, after all.

My right leg still looked crippled, and my arms were full of burn scars. Katara had made the water of my bath glow with healing powers yesterday, but all it had done was giving me a good feeling. My scars were too old for that, and my skin was paler than ever before. Not being in the sun for a while did that, I guessed. There were deep half circles under my eyes.

I didn't look like myself at all. I had always been the girl with the braided, light auburn hair, and with the darker skin, with the freckles. I had always stood straight, always seemed happy and proud, now that I had something to compare to.

The girl in the mirror wasn't I. It wasn't who I had been, who I had been forced to leave behind. Would I be able to like this girl in the mirror? Would I ever be okay with looking the way I did?

Pressing my eyes shut, I remembered what I had thought of Zuko's scar. It was a sign of survival. Zuko had endured horrible things and had survived. Because he was strong.

The again, he had one scar. It marred his face, but it didn't make him look ugly. Scars on men weren't horrible. They could even look cool or impressing. And Zuko had been scarred because he had tried to save people.

My scars were different. And I was a girl. A crippled, wounded girl whose scars didn't show any strength.

Would I be weak? Before, I would have bristled, when asked this, I would have objected heavily. But now, I just looked at me tiredly and walked back to the bedroom.

Breakfast wouldn't be served in hours, and I felt a little trapped in this room, but going out into the open was something I was even less comfortable with.

But I got the idea to write a letter home. I could send it away, as that would be faster than me actually travelling to Ba Sing Se.

Writing it took me a while. I didn't know what to say or how to say it. I mostly just wanted to leave the majority of what happened out of it.

After that, I practiced my waterbending. It was awful. My form was sloppy and I didn't know what to do about the missing muscle in my leg. I would need to learn how to perform the bending forms without shifting my weight. But only moving my arms didn't work, when I stood on the ground. I mostly splashed the chairs and sofa, so I stopped again, feeling frustrated.

I sat back down to write the letter, but my hand worked on its own suddenly, and the only thing I did was drawing circles, then flames, and then I pressed the brush almost violently to the paper, standing up quickly, clenching and unclenching my hands.

It was an hour after dawn, when the servant came to my room.

She asked me if I wanted to have breakfast in my room, or if I wanted to eat with the Fire Lord.

I hadn't thought of that. I knew I didn't want to be alone, but Zuko, Katara, and Toph weren't the people I wanted to be around now.

But what would I do if Nanuk were here? Would I tell him how I really felt? Or would I act and pretend to be okay, to be stronger, just like I had in the hospital, after losing my voice and ability to walk.

Instead of trying to answer the girl in any way, I simply walked out of the room. The corridor was empty, apart from two guards standing at the entrance to the stairs and lift.

I tensed a little, feeling wary of them, especially their uniforms. But these guards showed their faces. One looked extremely concentrated and tensed, while the other looked like he wanted to sleep.

I wondered if they had stood there all night long.

The servant girl glanced at me in a curious way, clearly wondering why her Fire Lord gave a prisoner, a scare crow like me, an own room and even wanted to eat with her.

I tried not to think about it.

We descended with the lift, which made me feel very uncomfortable. Such a small space, and it felt so much like a cell. My heart beat faster, and I felt myself sweating a little, but then we already were on the ground floor. The servant girl walked through a light corridor with huge windows, before entering a room which was guarded by two guards.

I entered after her, looking at a huge table, on which only sat Zuko. Behind him, I could see something like a garden through the windows. They let in a lot of light, too, and the morning sun had something calming to me in that moment.

"Your Majesty," the servant said, bowing deep.

Zuko stood up, his face lighting up with a smile.

And it made me feel good. I still liked seeing him smile. I still felt warmer on the inside, happy that he could smile.

"Kilara! I hoped you'd join me," he said, walking around the table towards me.

I blinked, before pressing my lips lightly together without pulling them into my mouth. Yeah, here I was.

"Thank you, Sera. That is all," he said to the servant, who gave him a tentative smile, before bowing again and turning to stand at the side.

Zuko motioned for me to follow him to a chair next to his. He didn't wear so many, heavy robes as he had yesterday. He didn't even wear shoulder plates, just some over his chest, a high collar, and around his forearms. He noticed me looking and rubbed his hand over his neck.

"Yeah, er, I have to wear these, because assassins always go for the heart or throat, you know."
I blinked again, my eyes widening. Assassins? Had Zuko been attacked?

He shrugged. "Some people aren't happy with Ozai being dethroned and me ending the war. I've tried to make it public knowledge that I would not neglect my own citizens, while trying to make amends with the other two nations, but not everyone seems to believe it." He pulled a chair out for me.

I sat down.

"But I have very good guards, and either Katara or Toph stay with me at night, so I'm much protected. And I'm also not a bad fighter." He smiled sheepishly and shrugged.

I couldn't fight the reassurance that I felt, and a smile appeared on my lips.

When he sat down at the head of the table, I blinked, noticing that I sat on his right side. I was fairly sure that it meant something in the Fire Nation, too.

The table was laid for two more people, and I suspected that it was for Katara and Toph.

In the middle of the table, though, laid several plates filled with food that smelled mouth wateringly good. There was even a pot full of noodle soup. A third of the food looked to be very spicy, giving its flaming red colour, so I already brushed it aside mentally.

Zuko cleared his throat. "Do you want to have some tea?" He reached for the tea pot and held it up.

I nodded and pushed my cup in his direction.

When he gave it back to me, I smiled at him and inclined my head to say thank you.

He smiled back. "It's a special sort of black tea, meant to strengthen the immune system. It also manages to wake you up in the morning," he said, and I couldn't help myself smiling wider.

He really had worked in a tea shop once. It was so easy to forget it.

After taking a sip of the very hot, but very delicious tea, I used my chopsticks to grab some fried buns, and then loaded my plate with fish and some fruit on the side. I didn't want to eat too heavy, especially as I hadn't eaten a lot of different things in the past six weeks.

Despite wanting to grab everything that looked delicious and just shove it into my mouth, I ate slowly and only took small bites.

"Are you happy with your room? Or is there anything you would like to change?" Zuko asked after I had started on eating.

I chewed, thinking. No, the room was fine. But then I pointed at my clothes.

Zuko seemed confused. "Er… Is there a chest in your room?"

I shook my head and grabbed onto the fabric.

"The clothes in there?" he asked.

I nodded, smiling. Now how could I tell him that I didn't want to wear anything red? That I'd prefer to have a few more sets of pink clothes?

I didn't know how to make him understand so I pretended to write something down in my hand and threw him a questioning look.

Zuko immediately turned to one of the servants sitting by the door and asked them to get something to write for me.

The servant bowed and left.

"I'd say you better eat now, before you tell me what's on your mind," Zuko suggested, and I agreed with him, nodding.

The food was delicious, and my tongue was definitely in heaven.

I noticed that Zuko's plate was empty, but there were crumbs on it, so I guessed he had eaten already. Now, he just sipped on his tea from time to time, his eyes having a faraway look.

"Does it bother you?" he suddenly asked.

I turned my head to look at him and raised my eyebrows.

He fidgeted a little. "That you're here. I mean, because I'm here. Because… you told me you didn't want anything to do with me. If my presence makes you uncomfortable…"

I quickly shook my head, contorting my eyebrows.

His eyes widened a little, but he didn't look very convinced.

I bit on my lip. Somehow, it hurt that he thought I didn't want to be in his presence. Of course, he had had to think that back then, but a part of me hadn't thought he would actually believe me.

He wasn't my favourite person in the world, and there were a few I would prefer to have with me now, but I knew how lucky I was to have been brought in front of him and not his father. I didn't even want to think about what Ozai would have done to me. And Zuko… He'd had every right to be mad at me. He could have used this to demonstrate his power. He could have made me feel weak and worthless, and he could have hurt me just as I had hurt him. But he hadn't even thought about it. He'd just been concerned and apparently happy to have found me.

But I didn't know how to tell him.

So I just looked at him, looked him in the eyes and tried to make my feelings clear on my face. Not that I thought he would be able to read them, but maybe he would see that there was no anger or contempt on my face.

His golden gaze stared back at me, his face strangely familiar, as if I had known him for way longer than I had, but it looked different now. Softer. He wasn't so lanky anymore, as he lived in a palace, but now that I thought about it… I had often thought that there was a storm, an inner war inside of Zuko, which I had seen on his face sometimes, in his behaviour, his mannerisms, and in his eyes. But that seemed to have gone. Could it be that Zuko was now at peace with himself?

I took a deep breath. This was so unfair, I wanted to know!

He nodded and smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. "Good. I would have left you alone, of course, but I really prefer not to." He took another sip of his tea.

I smiled at him and turned back to my breakfast.

"Katara told me she helped you in healing your throat yesterday. Do you feel any difference?" he asked tentatively.

Did he talk about yesterday afternoon, or did he know about Katara's visit to me in the middle of the night?

I nodded and showed him with my thumb and forefinger that it was a little better.

"Good," he said again. "I thought about what I said to you yesterday. About talking to me." He looked at me from under his lashes, which made him look a little nervous. He glanced to the left. "And I want to apologise for that. I shouldn't have tried to push you into talking. And who knows if talking to me would even do you any good? So, er, if you need someone to talk to, and when you're ready, there's a psychologist arriving at the palace in the next days. He was recommended to me by the court physician. So, there's that…" he trailed off rather awkwardly, grimacing, as if he knew how awkward he'd sounded.

But he looked and behaved exactly like the friend I'd had in the beginning of the occupation of Ba Sing Se, the only one who had known of my secret to bloodbend. I had adored my friend, I had liked him very much. I had thought that when I would be more mature, there could be more between us.

And now I saw again why I had thought that.

I couldn't help but smile at him.

But I didn't know what to think of a psychologist analysing me. I had heard of them, they were seen as downright charlatans in the Earth Kingdom, but as actual scientists in the Fire Nation. People talked to them and then realised that their feelings and behaviour were somehow tied to a traumatic event in their childhood they hadn't found any closure with. I didn't have such a traumatic event in my childhood. And I didn't want to talk to a strange person about what had happened to me in the last months.

I'd rather talk to Zuko.

The doors to the hall opened and Katara came striding in, followed by Toph. Katara held a letter in her hand, waving it around. They both seemed to be in a good mood.

"Guess what!" Toph exclaimed.

"Aang, Sokka, and Suki found the Earth King!" Katara said, beaming. "They have arrived in Ba Sing Se a few days ago, and the Earth King accepted your offer for peace, given to him by Iroh, and holds the full power over Ba Sing Se and the Earth Kingdom again!"

Zuko smiled. "That is really good news."

"Yeah, but his council doesn't trust you, so they invited you to a peace talk. To Ba Sing Se so that it will be on their terms," Toph added and plopped down next to Zuko on his left.

Katara sat down next to her, smiling shortly at me.

"That's only fair," Zuko answered, and I blinked at him.

Okay, so they had told me he had changed sides, and that he was their friend, but even so, I remembered Zuko to have quite a temper. If he felt unfairly treated, he would normally throw a fit.

Toph snorted. "Hardly fair on you."

"They don't know that Zuko means his peace offer. They don't know he's genuine," Katara said softly to her.

Zuko nodded. "Besides, after everything my country has done to the Earth Kingdom, it's just fair that I take responsibility and am the one to take a step in their direction. I wouldn't have dreamt of inviting them here at all."

"But you're not responsible for the war!" Toph cried out, slamming her foot against the table.

"No, I'm not. You're right," Zuko answered calmly. "But I am responsible of this country now. And its past is part of the Fire Nation," he simply said.

I was stunned. He spoke so calmly and serenely, it was… confusing. I didn't remember him ever seeming so calm. Maybe he really was at peace. He had found more friends on the other side, and it was clear that he hadn't just chosen to give up and let his Uncle have a happy life. He had really found his own path.

I remembered how he had told me that he didn't like the war, but that it was our reality and we couldn't do anything against it. Even if he ever became Fire Lord, he couldn't just end the war, angering his whole country. He'd said he would make the living conditions for the Earth people easier, and he'd promised me to use his power for something good. To be careful and considerate with it.

But he had managed to do so much more. I just now realised what this really meant. The importance and the gravity of it all became visible to me now.

Toph rolled her eyes, but Katara nodded at him with the expression of a proud teacher.

"When do we have to go?" Zuko asked.

"Next week," Katara answered.

I looked up with wide eyes. So they would leave next week for Ba Sing Se?

Zuko turned to look at me. "Kilara? Would you like to come with us? I don't know when there will be another opportunity for you to travel to the Earth Kingdom. At the moment, all the Fire Nation transports go from the Earth Kingdom to here."

I opened my mouth, realising too late that I shouldn't talk. So I just nodded vigorously and smiled wider than before.

"So you'll return to your family then?" Toph asked me.

I nodded, wondering how my family was doing these days. Had Dad woken up yet? And was he healed enough to walk again or would he never be able to do so? Had Nanuk escaped prison? Did he still have his internship? I was fairly sure that San was okay, as she had lived with her parents for quite a while. And what about Denzai? Had he been captured? But if Nanuk and he had not made it out of the rebellion safely, then surely General Iroh had rescued them, right?

The servant Zuko had asked to get me something to write came back, and I inclined my head to say thank you, before I began to write down my request.

I don't feel comfortable wearing these dark red robes in wardrobe. I've found two in pink. Could I maybe have a few more in pink?

Zuko frowned, and I wondered if I had offended his Fire Nation soul.

Katara whispered my question to Toph, who frowned, too, but I guess she was just confused, since it wasn't as if she could understand what colours were.

Zuko glanced shortly at Katara, who gave him a slightly pointed look, before he turned back to me and cleared his throat. "Of course. You will have your robes by tonight."

oOo

Katara began to weigh on my nerves. I knew she only meant well, but I felt a little smothered by her.

I was glad she kept helping me with healing my throat, as I couldn't wait to speak properly again, but Katara also thought she had to help me with a lot of other things.

She encouraged me to restart practising my waterbending, after I had written to her how difficult it was without a muscle in my right calf. At first, I was grateful for her help, too. She had taken me to a small square close to the throne room and the Fire Lord's study.

Zuko had scoffed that a former Fire Lord must have been really lazy to let his rooms be built so closely. Apparently, it had been Sozin. Had probably been too busy planning his war. But Zuko also found it practical, as he said he had so little time that he didn't want to waste any in walking from the throne room to his study. His private rooms were in the highest story of the royal tower, a rather modern addition to the palace. Before, everything had been on one storey and spread out with squares between the buildings. But the palace had needed to grow, and it couldn't grow beyond the walls, so it had grown into the air.

The square on which Katara and I practised our waterbending was the private training square of the Fire Lord or royal family. He had allowed Katara and Toph to use it ages ago, without so much as batting an eye.

It said a lot about Zuko's relationship to his biological family.

So, Katara had wanted to help me, and we were slowly making progress, thinking about waterbending forms where the calf muscle of the right leg was not needed. We found out there were no such forms. Instead, we tried to make me stand on that leg.

It was horrible. I was determined to get better, really I wanted to restart waterbending, but not being able to do much more than lifting water and letting it hover between my hands, there was nothing which I managed to do. I could easily direct the water to the left, or forward if my left leg stood in front of the other. But how was I going to fight like that?

Katara kept trying to encourage me. She said we just hadn't found the right strategy yet. She came up with other forms, other strategies all the time, trying very hard just for me to be able to fight with waterbending again.

I got that she was a nice and caring person, but I didn't understand why she helped me so much. Why she never did anything else.

And well, it started with just healing me and practising waterbending with me. But then she also started to encourage me to write down what had happened in prison. To write my memories down. She wanted me to share how I had got my scars.

And in the beginning I just smiled at her and wrote that I would think about it. But I had to make that clear to her twice a day.

Zuko brought up that the court physician doctor Gozen would like to help me to walk better again. He said she could help me with physical therapy.

I wrote that I would think about it.

And then Katara started to pressure me about going to Dr. Gozen. And then about talking to the psychologist, because he had only travelled to the palace because of me, and it would be impolite of me not to even meet him.

I knew that I should have technically been able to utter noises again, but I hadn't spoken for so long, and somehow I feared I had forgotten how to do it. What if my voice sounded like that of a baby? Or so clumsy and inelegant that I would cringe. What if I sounded dumb?

But whenever Katara was optimistic about my progress and tell me to go to the doctor, to the psychologist, to just try to speak, I was sometimes really tempted to yell at her to leave it. Maybe that was her strategy. To annoy me so much that I wouldn't have any other choice but to yell at her.

But I still didn't tell her to leave me alone. Or to let me practise waterbending by myself. Because no matter how infuriating she was, without her, I wouldn't have had the will to spend so much time practising. Whenever I just threw the water at the ground in frustration she said something that made me keep going. That made me try again. And again.

Toph was sometimes sitting at the edge of the square, 'watching' us, but she mostly practised her earthbending in a corner away from us. Sometimes, she wasn't even there, and I guessed that she kept Zuko company.

Zuko, I only saw during meals. He made an effort to join us for lunch, but was mostly rather late due to all his work, and then left early again. Breakfast and dinner was a bit more relaxed for him.

I knew he was waiting for me to tell him what had happened in prison. He kept looking at me in a questioning way, and I could also tell that he really wanted to punish the people who had burnt me. It was his right as Fire Lord, since they had broken the law.

From what he was saying during meals, I gathered that he was busy with military crimes at the time. Several generals and admirals had already been stripped of their ranks for committing treason against the people by voluntarily endangering them. Treason against the people was a new law that Zuko had added to the law book. It wouldn't prevent any Fire Lord from being accused of treason to his people. I just hoped Zuko would never rise the ire of his people.

Zuko was also busy building a new council. He was in the right to dismiss it any time, if he would be able to establish a new one during one week, making sure the Fire Lord would never be able to reign for too long without any supervision.

But Zuko didn't know a lot of the nobles and ministers who hadn't sat on the council very well. He had been too young to really understand if he could trust them.

The new minister of war was already decided, renamed minister of war reparations. Zuko had provided a new minister for finances for this work, too.

Toph insisted on a new minister for education, or at least making some reforms in the ministry. And Katara argued that Zuko also needed a minister of nature or the environment to prevent the new machines of the Fire Nation from polluting too much of their lands.

The only minister Zuko was okay with keeping was the minister of health.

Zuko

"Your Majesty, I have brought the guards assigned to the fourth floor of the capital prison," the warden said, standing straight with his hands behind his back.

I kept my most threatening face on. Calm, but unimpressed and angered.

"Good. Bring them in," I said.

"Yes, Your Majesty." He bowed and walked out of the throne room to fulfil my order.

I had to strain myself to keep a calm and stoic face. I was tense and impatient, wanting to know what the guards would tell me. I had found that there were documents about the prisoners, but that no one had bothered to document what the guards or investigators did once they had entered the prison for their shift. No one documented who entered a prison cell. But I had to know who had entered Kilara's.

Fortunately, I knew in which cell she had been.

Twenty guards followed the warden into the throne room, all looking stoic and keeping their selves upright. They were all taller than me, older than me, had more experience, were probably more cunning… But I had lived on a ship with only older, and taller men than me for three years. And sailors were all pretty intimidating, mostly in a bad mood.

I might have been Fire Lord, but I was still sixteen years old. Well, my birthday would be in a few weeks, but still. Sixteen was young.

The guards bowed to me, all down on their knees and stretching their torsos and arms out on the floor.

"Rise. I have ordered you all here to answer some questions I have," I began. "I wish to know who exactly has entered the prison cell five on your storey for the last seven weeks. There was a prisoner in there until a few days ago. A girl, badly injured. I want to know who had access to her cell."

One of the guards took a step forward, bowing. "Your Majesty, if I may."

I inclined my head. "You may."

The guard righted himself again, clearing his throat. "I stood in front of that cell, while the girl was in there. I brought her food in. Other than me, there was only the interrogator and the cleaner entering her cell."

I nodded. "Very well. Have you been assigned to her or have you always guarded this cell?"

"I have always guarded this cell, my Lord."

Shortly, I closed my eyes, trying to remember my next step. "Who of you have seen the girl being brought into the prison?"

Six guards stepped forward.

"Was she already in this… bruised condition?" I asked, trying not to sound compassionate to Kilara or angry on her behalf.

One guard scratched his head.

"Er," said another one and tapped her chin.

"Yes, my Lord," said another one, bowing to me. "I remember seeing how her arms were burnt. And I think her face looked bad, too. She seemed unconscious, as she was carried into the cell."

Anger rose within me. Unconscious? Who the magma had made Kilara unconscious?

Remembering what had stood in her documents, I spoke up again. "Has anyone come with her from the Boiling Rock to the capital prison?"

The warden stepped forward. "Yes, Your Majesty. The interrogator had come with her. He had interrogated her at Boiling Rock and wanted to keep doing so here, too."

My eyes narrowed. Aha, now this was some progress. Good thing I had remembered how that man had looked.

"What is his name?" Somehow, my voice did not tremble with anger.

"Saburo, my Lord."

"Tell him to come to me as soon as possible. I have to discuss… some concerns about the prisoner with him."

Kilara

I hadn't slept well. I hadn't slept much. Three days hadn't done much to get me used to sleeping in a proper bed again. To know that I was safe. My mind didn't understand it, as it forced me to live through the prison in my dreams again. Only that these dreams were all worse than what had actually happened.

Tired and exhausted as I was, I tried to form the water whip for the eleventh time. My footage felt a little safer, but the water didn't reach as far as it used to. I could only bend my weight on my left leg, but I was almost completely standing on that one. The water whip was weak, too. Katara managed to kick through it. The whip was also too close to the ground. It should be at chest level.

"Kilara, that was really good already. But I don't think it will get better, until you go see the doctor for physical therapy. Only she can teach you to walk again," Katara said in a placating and soft tone. "It's just a few days until we leave for Ba Sing Se, and the doctors there aren't as good as the ones here."

That was a new argument of hers. And a good one at that.

Did I want to go back to my family like this? Not walking properly, not standing properly for a long time? Maybe I would not be able to get better in Ba Sing Se. If I came back from prison like this… it would just hurt them. And this was not necessary.

Katara had told me for the fifth time now that I should go to physical therapy. I've heard enough of that!

Angrily, I threw the water down again, then turned around and limped away.

"Kilara! Where are you going?" Katara cried after me.

She was next to me in a few seconds, since she could run, and I couldn't.

I grabbed my writing things. Where can I find this damn doctor?

Katara raised an eyebrow, clearly because of the swear word, but held back any comment. She was probably too happy that I was finally doing what she wanted me to. She was very bossy.

"I'll show you," she said, let me lean onto her, and walked me into the palace again.

We didn't have to walk very far, but into another building.

It really looked the same like the others. Red painted walls, metal doors, a lot of red curtains, sun and dragon embellishments and paintings.

"I'm glad Zuko chose to redecorate a little. After his coronation, it was one of the first things he had the servants do. So there aren't any Sozin or Sozin's Comet worshipping paintings around anymore. It looks a lot nicer, although I still can't stand the royal tower. Too dark and too much metal. Until they have more windows there, it will take a while," Katara blabbered, until we arrived in front of a metal door.

There was a golden helix on the door and under it were letters. Court Physician Dr. Gozen.

Katara knocked, then turned to me. "She's really nice. She won't judge you for being from the Water Tribe."

I grimaced. I was not from the Water Tribe. I was from the Earth Kingdom. An Earth Kingdom citizen. Just because I could waterbend and looked more like a Water Tribe person than an Earth Kingdom person didn't make me from the Water Tribes.

Dr. Gozen opened the door. She was a stern looking woman with a tight bun in her neck and small, oval glasses sitting on her nose. Besides that, she couldn't be older than forty. I wondered how such a young woman could have become court physician.

She raised an eyebrow at seeing the two of us. "Master Katara, Miss Huang. What can I do for you?"

"Kilara is here because of the physical therapy," Katara announced happily.

Dr. Gozen looked at me, and I didn't feel very comfortable under that look. "I bet she's here to get informed on it. And maybe to work out a schedule. As I can't just leave everything I've been working on to help a teenager who's too stubborn to come when she's asked to."

Okay, that made me feel bad. I cringed, pressed my lips together and bowed in order to excuse my behaviour.

"Er… Working out a schedule sounds good," Katara said quickly.

I nodded.

Dr. Gozen stared at us for two more seconds, before inclining her head. "Fine. Come in."

Katara meant to follow me, but I blocked her and quickly scribbled I can do this on my own on the paper I was carrying around with me.

She stopped. "Oh, yeah, sure. Alright. I'll be… in the courtyard, I guess."

After I closed the door, I looked around the study and wondered where the physical therapy was to take place. Even though I wouldn't do that now.

"Miss Huang, please take a seat." Dr. Gozen gestured to the chair in front of her desk.

There were many shelves full of books in this office, and cupboards full of weird instruments, as well as a cot. The room was not painted in red, though, but in a light brown tone.

I limped over to the chair and sat down, feeling relieved at not having to stand anymore.

Dr. Gozen sat down in front of me and went through some files on her desk, before flipping through a little, red book. Her eyebrows were contorting, and she wrote something down in the book, then on some files.

Was she actually checking her schedule or just ending the work Katara and I had interrupted her from?

But I didn't want to annoy the woman any more, so I tried to be as calm as possible.

"You're leaving for Ba Sing Se in four days, is that right?" Dr. Gozen asked, looking at me over her glasses, her expression critical.

I nodded.

She sighed and leaned back. "Well, okay, I can work with you until then, but four days aren't going to do anything. I can show you, however, how you can get better on your own, once you're gone. It would still be wise to have a doctor observe you, but…" She clicked her tongue. "Those Earth Kingdom doctors are rumoured to work with herbs and sound bowls. If that is true, I doubt any of them could help you."

I frowned, thinking about Dr. Wenjin. He had given me a balm against my burns and cuts. Wasn't that the best what could be done, if you weren't a water healer?

"I will also write you a rehabilitation plan." She tipped her pen to her chin, looking out of the window, before narrowing her eyes at my throat. "For your leg and your throat."

My eyes widened. My throat? But Katara already helped me with this. What would physical therapy bring? Katara already almost healed my vocal chords.

The doctor raised an eyebrow. "And yet you're unable to speak." She looked away, searching for a blank paper and began to write on it.

I frowned. Did this mean, physical therapy would help me with my voice? It made sense, a little. Maybe I could learn a way to sound normal again.

Dr. Gozen put the paper in a folder and wrote my name on it. "That's for you to take with you, when you'll leave. Now, I must ask you to go, but this afternoon I'm free to help you. Be here at four thirty. And be on time," she added sternly.

I nodded. I was always on time.

Thank you, I wrote.

She nodded and stood up.

I took that as my cue to leave.

"Hold on," she said and held up a hand.

I blinked. What was it now?

"Just a second." She walked to one of the wardrobes and took out two crutches. "They have wool around their handles. The koala sheep wool will make it softer to walk with them, so you can walk longer with them. But it won't make you warm. This wool cools."

Before I accepted the crutches, I bowed again, and then I walked out of the room, feeling a little better.

Dr. Gozen seemed like a woman who knew what she was doing. And she wouldn't be soft and optimistic like Katara. I had never learned well under nice teachers. So I had the feeling that this doctor would really be able to help me.

Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it!:) Let me know what you think!:)

Okay, now we know finally that Kira is safe, and I can promise that nothing bad is going to happen to her in the close future. She will completely focus on healing her mind and body from now on.

I have no idea what Gozen means, the word was just in my head from the name of a supervillain from the cartoon Miraculous. This doesn't mean Dr. Gozen is evil. Also, I think the word is stressed on the second syllable.

Answers to reviews:

To uchihaNaruto247: Thanks for your review!:) Oh, I really enjoyed to write chapter 26, too. It was so much filled with moments that I have been wondering about! And I just love writing the gaang! And well, yeah, the gaang worried about dying, but we knew no one would die:) And I really don't like retellings, that's why I just come up with moments in between that are supposed to connect the scenes of canon, as most know the series well, and since Avatar's been on Netflix for some while now, I guess almost everyone in the Avatar fan community rewatched it, so writing these canon scenes seemes pretty unnecesaary to me. And yeah, that's definitely what's awaiting Kilara now. Not that it's going to be easy, either. To deal with what had happened to Kilara won't be easy for her.

To Znkp: Thanks for your review!:) And I'm glad you liked the chapter!

To Vosck: Thanky ou for your review!:) Well, I enjoyed the writing about the gaang part, and the resolving of 'Kilara has been brought before Ozai misunderstanding'.