Chapter 22
The Ways of Darkness and Light
Severus gazed through his younger self's eyes, which stared into a mirror, searching for any sign of corruption he might have taken on since he'd acquired the dark mark.
He was still staying at Potter Cottage, recovering from his initiation into the Death Eaters. Lily had examined the dark mark, and though she was able to discern the major charm that governed it, it was woven with deeper magic at its core, which she could not decipher. Severus had the uneasy feeling that he'd lost something when he'd been branded- that he'd been corrupted, somehow.
Physically, he looked the same as ever. He still bore the same hooked nose, sallow complexion, and heavy brow that pulled his eyes into a perpetual glare. If evil comes to tempt under the guise of beauty, Severus thought, then he must be angelically good.
As for the usual signs of exposure to a dark ritual- shadowed eyes, gaunt cheeks, pale skin- Severus found it impossible to discern those from the effects of normal fatigue. He supposed he would simply have to ask Lily and James to watch him carefully for any sign of corruption, though he wondered if they would be able to do what they must if he proved to be a danger to them, now.
"Narcissistic, much?" drawled a voice from the doorway, breaking through his reverie.
"Perfect- just the man I need," Severus said briskly, turning to face Sirius. "I need your help."
"My help?" Sirius blinked, as though taken aback. "Why not ask Lily or James?"
"Because the task requires an enemy."
Sirius smiled, baring his teeth in a menacing way. "Then I'm your man."
Severus approached Sirius slowly and then, when the two were face to face, he pulled up the sleeve of his robe, revealing the dark mark.
Sirius continued to lean against the doorway, regarding the mark coolly. "Yes, well done. Quite impressive," he said.
"You aren't afraid of it?" Severus growled.
"Not in the least."
"Well- I am. This thing has been burned into my very flesh, and aside from calling me to the Dark Lord's side, I have no idea what it does. That's why I need you to watch me."
Sirius said nothing, his face a neutral mask.
"If my appearance or behavior changes, if I do anything suspect, or if it seems like I will turn against any of you, I need you to do whatever it takes to neutralize me- up to and including the killing curse. Can you do that?"
"Sure. Now ask me to do something I wasn't planning to do, anyway," Sirius said.
Severus smirked, lowering his sleeve. "That's all. Thank you."
Sirius stood straighter. His neutral mask cracked just enough to allow a light of concern to shine through his eyes. "Then do one thing for me in return. Reggie- was he at the initiation, last night?"
"No," Severus said quietly. "They don't take anyone under the age of 17."
Sirius nodded. "Will you tell me when he does join?"
"I will try. Many of the members wear masks, even when it's just us, but if I recognize him, I will tell you."
"Thanks." Sirius moved aside to let Severus pass just as the explosion happened.
"No! There has to be another way!"
"Ah- it seems that James has decided to tell Lily our little plan," Sirius observed.
Severus rushed down the stairs and saw that, indeed, James was standing in front of Lily, who wore a look of panic.
Severus, recognizing the look, approached Lily slowly, and then took her hand in his.
"Look at me, Lily. Take deep breaths. It's okay."
"Tell him he can't- there has to be another way," Lily gasped.
"There's time- nothing has to be decided now," Severus said smoothly. "Let's sit down and talk this over."
"But Sev-" Lily said between short, sharp breaths. "James just told me that Moody is involved, now. If we give them names, then there will be investigations, trials, and then… then people will be sent to that place."
"Lily, please breathe."
"And he said that you were going to include your name with the rest. What if you are arrested? What if you get thrown in Az- Az…"
Lily began to hyperventilate, and Severus, ignoring the questioning look he got from James, put his arm around Lily's shoulder, steering her toward the couch.
"Lily- just sit and breathe. Wait one moment."
Severus closed his eyes, and he summoned a memory to his mind. Usually, to cast this spell, he thought of the day Lily swore to be his friend forever, but now he found a different memory came to mind.
"Wait- Lily, are you saying… you choose both of us?" Severus said.
"Yes, if the two of you feel the same way," Lily whispered.
"I do," James said. "I care for both of you. I want to be with both of you."
Then James and Lily both turned to Severus, the same, shy smile on both of their faces.
"Expecto Patronum!"
A silver light burst forth from the tip of Severus's wand. The light shimmered, and then coalesced into a brilliant doe.
The doe gamboled around the perimeter of the room, as though overcome with immense joy at its birth. Then it stopped, dipped its head, and approached Lily, treading on gentle hooves until it was close enough to rest its incorporeal head on her lap.
Lily's breath grew still and calm once more, and her eyes shone as she watched the gentle doe.
"Oh- Sev. It's beautiful," she whispered. "Thank you."
The doe dipped its head once more, as though bowing to Lily, and then it dissipated into the air once more.
Severus sat beside Lily. James hesitated, as though unsure, and then sat on her other side.
"Do you have any ideas Lily- any at all- that would allow us to defeat the Death Eaters without prosecution?" Severus asked. There was no challenge in his voice- the question was asked sincerely.
"No, I don't," Lily said quietly. "But- give me a week. I will think about it as thoroughly as I can."
"You have longer than a week. As I said, it will take some time before we can give Dumbledore the list of Death Eater names. A lot of the death eaters wear masks, so I have recognized only a few. Besides- Regulus Black hasn't joined the Death Eaters yet, and Dumbledore doesn't quite trust Sirius, so our misdirection won't work."
"It should be three more months," Sirius said.
"We'll focus on slowing the Death Eaters down, for now. But Lily, we can't stall forever."
"I know," she whispered.
"Lily- I hate to ask," James ventured, "but why don't you want to prosecute Death Eaters? They would hurt you and your family without a second thought."
Lily looked up, her eyes flashing. "It's because of that- that place."
"When I told Lily about Azkaban, and about the dementors, it frightened her." Severus said. "I think it's her greatest fear."
"It did more than frighten me. I was appalled. I couldn't believe there was still a place, in this day and age, where a legitimate government systematically tortures prisoners to death."
"If I told you the kinds of things dark wizards have done, it would curl your hair," Sirius said. "It's not less than they deserve, trust me."
Lily stood then, her eyes blazing.
"There were once muggles who thought the same way- who still do think the same way. But the major governments learned hard lessons in the second world war, and so they drafted something called the Geneva Convention. There are certain lines we shouldn't cross, if we want to be better than those we call evil. No matter what they've done- no matter how much we think they deserve it, or how much we desire vengeance- we don't torture prisoners."
Sirius chuckled. "What strange notions, muggles have concocted! Why shouldn't you punish those who have done wrong?"
Lily took a deep breath, as though controlling an outburst. Then she spoke calmly. "Let me put it this way; do you think that your justice system is perfect? Surely, with all of the magical means criminals have to confuse aurors, at least one or two innocent people have been convicted."
"I guess it's possible," Sirius said.
"So- how many innocent people is it acceptable to torture, in order to get at the bad guys?"
Sirius grimaced. "I guess I see your point. But- it seems like the Aurors should just work harder to catch the real bad guys, in that case. It's no reason to just… let dark wizards roam the streets."
Lily gaped at Sirius for a moment. "You must be joking. Do you really think the only two options are torture and anarchy?"
"Wizards are harder to keep incarcerated than muggles. Without the dementors there to drain people of hope, everyone would just escape," Sirius said.
"I hardly think that's the case- you could at least try something else," Lily said. "I can't condone torture, even of the worst criminals, let alone the innocent. At their core, dementors are creatures of pure suffering. You can't defeat the darkness by adding more suffering to the world."
"You really believe that?" Sirius said, a look of amazement on his face.
"I believe that so strongly, that when Sev told me about the Azkaban, I almost decided to reject my Hogwarts letter. I thought I'd stay in the muggle world, get my A levels, study engineering, and with enough hard work, get a position at NASA. I could be happy in the muggle world. Still, the call of magic was too strong for me to resist, so I came, and I vowed to make the wizarding world a better place."
"You will make it a better place," James said firmly.
Lily turned and graced James with a small smile, and then turned back to Sirius.
"You know, I think I see why the purebloods call you mad," Sirius said. "And you know what? I respect that kind of chaos, even if I don't agree with it."
Lily bowed to Sirius ironically, and then sat hard on the sofa.
"So, even if we can't avoid prosecuting all of the death eaters, why must we include your name, Sev?" she asked.
"My name would be conspicuous in its absence," Severus said. "If I include Avery, Mulciber, and Rosier, and leave off Snape, he'll think that either the informant is trying to protect me, or he'll figure out right away that I'm the snitch."
"So why not let Dumbledore know that you're the snitch?"
"Yeah, that's a great idea," Severus drawled. "Hey professor, I'm a Death Eater, but I'm still on your side. I just went and became a rogue spy, without any training or official permission. By the way, I'm an occlumens, so you can't verify any of this. You totally trust me, right?"
Lily winced. "I see your point. Still, if you're on the list, he'll follow through, just like he will with the others. He might find evidence against you."
"Dumbledore's asked me to join his club," James said. "I'll keep an eye out. The second Dumbledore gets any evidence against Sev, Sev will disappear."
"You can really make that happen?"
"My family might own a certain piece of land in a certain remote area of a certain country…"
"Ok- point taken," Lily said. "I'll tell you if I have any better ideas. Will you take my ideas seriously?"
"Do you even have to ask?" Severus said.
Lily smiled and took Severus's hand.
Sirius cleared his throat, as though reminding them he was still in the room before they could kiss. "By the way, Snape, I think you're in the clear."
"How so?" Severus asked, not taking his eyes off of Lily.
"With regards to the conversation we had earlier- I hadn't seen your Patronus, then. I don't actually think you could be corrupt, and cast a Patronus so bright."
Then, before Severus could reply, Sirius yawned loudly. "Well, I'm pretty well knocked-up. I'm going upstairs. You kids don't get into too much trouble."
#
Severus, James, and Lily remained in the sitting room late into the night, kissing and talking as they drifted further and further into their own little world. The lights were extinguished, and only a blazing fire lit the room with flickering orange light, which danced in Lily's auburn hair and flickered on the surface of James's glasses.
Severus was entranced by the sight.
"James- can we talk about it, now… the thing you showed us," Lily asked quietly.
"Ill try." He cleared his throat. "The Peverell family quest. The philosopher's stone. Defeating death. Yep- seems like I can."
Lily sighed deeply. "I can still hardly believe it. It seems like a dream. Imagine having an eternity to explore the cosmos."
"I'm glad I have you to imagine that, Lily. I would have grown bored with eternity without the cosmos to explore. I would never have thought to try, and imagine spending eternity on Earth!"
"You would have thought of it eventually," Lily said. Then she turned to Severus, and smiled even more widely. "And Severus will take us even beyond that, by exploring the deepest secrets of magic, and all her realms."
Severus blinked. "I will?"
Lily nodded. "It was the great ambition you told me, shortly after you were sorted into Slytherin. Don't you remember?"
The sad thing was that Severus had forgotten his great ambition. Ironically, Slytherin and its petty politics had taken his eye off of the dream that had convinced the hat to sort him there in the first place.
"Making the stone requires alchemy," Severus said, turning the conversation to practical matters. "Your transfiguration scores are good, but will you need help with the potions aspect?"
James nodded. "I would appreciate that, yeah. I have the family grimoire to follow, but the notes are complicated. But most of all- the three of us need to consummate our soul bond for the final step. Don't worry," James said with a laugh. "I know it sounds weird, but it's nothing dirty."
"Oh darn," Lily sighed.
"We just add our blood together, and make a vow," James continued. "And then, if it works, the elixir of life should emerge."
Severus rolled this around in his mind for a time, wondering what mechanisms drove the power of the stone, and why a soul-bond was necessary to make it work.
After a time, Lily spoke. "James, I've seen a lot of evidence for the existence of souls since I came to Hogwarts. Do you think there is an afterlife?"
"There is," he said simply.
"If there is, then why did your family vow to destroy death?" Lily said.
"My ancestor- Ignotus Peverell- he… he saw beyond the veil," James said softly. "What he saw was a fate he could not abide."
"The veil- you mean the veil between the living and the dead? How did he do that? Psychedelics?"
"The veil is a physical object, not a metaphor or anything. He just walked through. They still keep the veil in the department of mysteries. We could even go visit it, if you want."
Lily blinked, seeming too stunned to speak.
"Usually, mortals who look through it never come back, but Ignotus had the resurrection stone, which allowed him to pass freely back and forth between the realms."
"He had not yet made his vow to defeat death, yet he had a resurrection stone?" Severus asked.
James nodded. "According to family lore, his brother made the stone for that purpose, so they could unravel the secrets of death and tell the living. There were three Peverell brothers who worked together to unravel the secrets of death, but Ignotus- the founder of the line- was the most courageous of the three. He was courageous enough to pass through the veil alone, and what he saw was enough to frighten even him."
"What did he see?" Lily asked quietly.
"He saw the righteous who had passed into heaven spending eternity in stagnation. They were happy, they were in paradise, but they were unable to learn, explore, grow, or change. Aeon after aeon, they remain in the same garden paradise."
James's voice took on a formal cadence, as though he were reciting an ancient tome from memory.
"But the righteous are few, and the corrupt are many. Ignotus witnessed the fate of the corrupt, who suffer eternally in abject torment, all for mortal crimes committed in the scope of mortal days. Ignotus's heart broke when he witnessed these horrors, and he swore that one day the torment would end, and all human souls would be free."