Only once had Elissa dreamt of darkspawn, but the last two nights, it was all she had seen. Shrieks, genlocks, hurlocks, ogres, even the Archdemon, once, briefly, before she was roused for her watch shift. She had never been so grateful to be woken.
The Archdemon looked nothing like the high dragon they'd defeated at the temple. She had thought that thing was impossibly large, but the Archdemon looked bigger. Fangs curled out of its lips and its eyes... She swore it looked right at her. It looked right through her soul, chilled her to her core, and she had been dreaming.
Elissa shuddered at the very thought of it.
For whatever it was worth, Aedan and Alistair's sleeping seemed to be equally disturbed. Breakfast was their time to report to each other on the nightmares. Theirs were just as horrifying as her own.
She was not excited to see darkspawn.
They hadn't seen any since leaving Orzammar, something their newest companion, a drunk named Oghren, said was due to all the recent expeditions his people had been making. It would be unlikely they saw many until they passed through the Dead Trenches, where the Legion of the Dead were currently holed up. He hadn't made it clear, but to Elissa, it sounded like they were trapped, and not camped there.
Regardless, Aedan kept them in a formation as they explored. He and Alistair were at the front, with Sten behind, followed by Wynne, then Morrigan, Leliana, and Zevran. As usual, Elissa brought up the rear with the dwarf, who seemed more content to belch and drink than talk.
Elissa was perfectly okay with that, but she didn't see the logic in keeping their supposed guide in the back.
They would have to go to the Trenches no matter what—it was said that was the direction of the Anvil of the Void, so Paragon Branka would've likely gone that way, and that was who they were looking for.
She took a drink out of her waterskin. It was almost empty, and that was with her rationing out how much she drank. They hadn't even reached Caridin's Cross yet, and despite Oghren's earlier assurances that they would today, Elissa was still nervous about their water and food supply. She wasn't sure what the others had brought, but she knew she'd likely have to share if they were going to get through this.
Past Sten's broad form, it was difficult to see Aedan, but everyone else halted, so she pushed her way up to his side. As she went, chills tingled down her spine and her mouth went dry.
Darkspawn.
"You feel it too?" Aedan asked.
Both her and Alistair nodded, and Elissa fell back to her place with Oghren before they continued.
The last time they'd seen any darkspawn of real number, Elissa had her ass handed to her. Aedan and Leliana had both saved her life, and she was determined to not fuck around this time. She was a Grey Warden and they were darkspawn. She was better than that.
Just in case, Elissa loosened her sword in its scabbard. If they were close enough to know there were darkspawn about, the darkspawn would know they were here too. It was only a matter of time before they'd come and investigate. Elissa just hoped she was ready to rely entirely on her sword. No blocking arrows now.
She edged away from Oghren and the rest of the group to walk closer to the pillars and braziers along the walls. How they were still lit, she didn't know. Another marvel of dwarven engineering, no doubt. It was a pity they were reduced to a few isolated cities. Dwarves were magnificent engineers, architects, smiths. If the job existed, dwarves probably excelled at it.
Hell, if she actually remembered to force a stop at the Circle, she didn't doubt Dagna would be better at scholarly work than an actual mage. If they accepted her. The First Enchanter owed them, so she hadn't expected him to say no.
Why the hell a dwarf would want to study magic still eluded her.
She turned to rejoin the group, but...what was that noise?
Elissa looked back over her shoulder, towards the pillar she'd just walked past. It was strangely dark behind it. As weird as it sounded, they hadn't once been left without light since entering the Deep Roads. Even when they had to go around collapsed sections and through darkspawn tunnels, they were well lit.
So what was causing the shadow?
She smelled the darkspawn before she saw it. Screams echoed through the walls and fire erupted in front of the path and ahead of her, effectively cutting her off from the rest of the party and trapping them.
It was a trap.
A genlock sprang from the shadow, brandishing two wicked looking daggers. It hissed as she drew her sword. Maker, it was so ugly, and she remembered immediately why she hated the darkspawn so much.
It came at her in a blur, daggers spinning and twirling, and it was a wonder that she managed to fend off its attacks without her shield. As it thrust for her belly, Elissa stepped to the side and used her momentum to cut through its throat. Not a second later, the head rolled from its shoulders, and the beast collapsed.
Through the flames, Elissa could see and hear the others fighting. She couldn't reach them. She didn't know how.
And there it was—the knowledge and ability flowing through her veins at the behest of the spirit. It showed her in less than a second, helped her execute the spell just as quick. Frost dripped from her hand as it shot through the fire, erupting in a flash. She flinched, as did the darkspawn and her surrounding companions.
Aedan's voice. "Find the emissary!"
She couldn't react to him fast enough. Two hurlocks disengaged from Oghren's axe to attack her. They carried similar swords to the genlock's daggers, but they were longer, sharper.
Maker, did they stink. Smelled like rotten fish, eggs, and death, all rolled into one disgusting package.
Elissa rolled to the side to dodge the first swipe, and answered back with a thrust of her own. It managed to connect with a shield, but as soon as her sword bounced off it, it came round and collided with her chest.
Winded, she staggered back to regain her bearings. Without her shield, she would have to be the one initiating blows, and she hadn't been ready for that.
She steeled herself as she came to that realization. The hurlocks didn't give her much time to think—both were on her in a flash, swords clattering off hers. The leather in her armor creaked as it was strained for the first time, its first real taste of battle, and Elissa had to force a lot more than she should have. The leather caps on her shoulders, they were the hardest to deal with.
The darkspawn fell back for a brief second, regrouping, and then came forward again, one intending to cleave her in half from top to bottom, while the other went for the same result, but from the ribs. She caught the one's hand in her own, holding its sword up in the air as she smacked the other aside. As it reeled, she twisted a wrist, and stabbed it through the heart. The second crumpled under a cut across the chest.
The flames fell back into the stone rather unceremoniously. Alistair was in the process of cutting down a hurlock, battering its staff aside before driving his sword through its gut. He deflected an arrow from a rogue further down the road, but it was answered back by a bolt of lightning from Morrigan.
At least they protected each other where it mattered, Elissa supposed.
She doubled over, still winded from the blow to her chest, while the others finished the darkspawn off. There hadn't been many, but there were enough to give them pause for a few minutes.
"Huh," Oghren grumbled. He was already taking a swig from his flask. "Maybe you are a Grey Warden."
She just looked at him, dumbstruck, and said, "Did you think I was lying?"
He grunted. "Never know with them surfacers."
"Yes, I'm just wearing this for fun," Elissa retorted, gesturing to herself.
He looked at her suspiciously, hrumphed one more time, and then wandered off to recuperate alone. Elissa hunched back over, lungs heaving, and sat solidly on the ground. A groan escaped her lips as fatigue seeped through her muscles.
It was that spell. She'd never done anything like that before.
Someone sat beside her just as she toppled backwards. A nap would be good. Cracking an eye open, Elissa recognized Leliana, and she grunted a greeting.
"Here," Leliana said.
She was offering the same mixture she'd offered once before. It was a lyrium potion, but then, where did she get it? Wynne? Morrigan?
Almost as if she was reading her mind, Leliana said, "I didn't think you would come prepared. I bought a few before we left."
Elissa forced herself upright. These things were gross, weren't they? She vaguely recalled it tasting like absolute ass, but she took the vial anyway.
"Thanks," Elissa managed once she'd swallowed a mouthful. It burned a bit as it went down her throat and she grimaced. "Just as disgusting as ever."
"Have you ever done anything like that before?" Leliana asked quietly. Elissa just shook her head and got to her feet. She helped the bard up as well. When Elissa went to return the potion, Leliana looked at her like she'd grown a second head. "What am I supposed to do with that?"
Elissa frowned. "Keep mothering me, maybe."
That elicited a giggle, but Leliana left her there, quickly falling into her position in the line. Once Elissa was in hers, they kept moving. She tucked the small gift into a pouch on her hip. There wasn't much of anything in there anyway, save some linen.
She wiped down her sword with a dirty scrap as they walked. The black blood stained everything it touched—a few drops had gotten on her jacket, and she knew they would be there forever. Even metal, if it wasn't cleaned immediately, would blacken from the darkspawn blood. The Blight destroyed everything it came into contact with, swords and armor included.
It was difficult to clean while she walked, but it had been a short fight and she had the opportunity to wipe the blade off as soon as it was over. All the blood came off after a few strokes, and she stared at the runes again briefly. She wondered what they could be. Old enchantments were possible, but blessings and vows were more likely. Their family hadn't always been as prominent as it had been as of late, and this sword had been through most of those times. Whoever had this crafted likely couldn't afford enchantments.
That was mildly disappointing, but then, she couldn't either, so who was she to complain? Maybe someday, after the Blight was over and she actually had some coin saved up.
They ran into another pack of darkspawn at what Oghren promised was Caridin's Cross. They'd built structures here, small ones, and campfires blazed lazily near tents. It was at that point Elissa realized this wasn't a darkspawn camp, but one that belonged to dwarves, and Oghren and Aedan both seemed to pick up on it as well.
The men deduced it wasn't old enough to have been Branka's, but it still belonged to someone. Their bodies were nowhere to be found. Morrigan suggested they had likely been dragged off to be eaten or turned into darkspawn themselves, and Elissa felt her stomach roil at the thought.
Being eaten alive or turned into darkspawn didn't sound like very good ways to go. She much preferred the idea of templars hunting her down and killing her to that.
Aedan announced they'd be spending the night here, so she found a spot that wasn't covered in darkspawn muck, and settled down for a long night. Leliana joined her after a while, offering water of her own, but Elissa waved it aside. She wouldn't feel right taking something like that away from her, and instead drank her own. She had maybe another two mouthfuls in her wineskin.
Elissa in turn offered some of her jerky. Leliana rejected her offer, too, and so they sat.
"This is the worst," Elissa said.
Leliana was drawing absentmindedly in the dirt with an arrow. "On that, we can agree."
Elissa was content to watch her doodle for a while. There didn't seem to be anything in particular she was drawing, just entertaining herself. The scratching of the arrowhead on the stone was irritating, but it was soothing otherwise. It was just enough of a distraction that Elissa's mind could go blank.
Probably a good thing, too. Every time it got the chance now, that spirit would try and communicate. It made Elissa uncomfortable, and she had to try harder than she liked to make sure her thoughts and feelings were her own. The more she failed, the braver it got, and the more of herself she lost.
Just now, when the spirit had practically forced her to cast a spell, it made her head ache. It was muddled by the lyrium potion, but she knew it would wear off quickly. If she couldn't cast a spell like that naturally, why would it force it if it knew it would cause her physical pain?
Because it wanted to keep her friends safe, too, so she was happy.
Elissa swallowed deeply. Not her. That wasn't her. It was that thing, explaining itself. She was torn between trusting it had her best interests at heart and fearing what it was doing to her. It kept her safe, yes, but she was losing herself in it.
She put her head between her knees and groaned loudly. This entire situation made her head hurt. Everything these days made her head hurt, but this was definitely not helping.
There had to be a way to reverse this like they did with Connor, or a way for her to protect who she was from who the spirit was. There had to be something. Someone must've seen this before. There must be a solution.
Leliana's hand ran up and down her back briefly. It made her shudder. They hadn't been able to do much of anything since Redcliffe, talking included, and it hurt. One of the few good things to come of this mess, and Elissa was stuck hiding it.
Leliana seemed to respect Elissa's want for privacy, though she said she didn't mind if people knew. If Elissa wanted to tell Aedan, she was free to, but she didn't think there was a need for it. They both had a pretty good idea of what the other was feeling. Whether or not that had something to do with them being twins was anyone's guess. It was likely Aedan knew about them, or suspected something.
Everyone else, though, Elissa didn't want them sticking their noses into her life. Not even Alistair, and she thought they had been getting on rather well lately.
"Are you all right?"
Elissa straightened and forced a weak smile. "Yeah, I'm fine."
She knew Leliana saw right through her lie, but she thanked the Maker that she had the grace to not pry.