A/N: Hello ! I'm late again, but here's the 29. A quick warning for the padawans who might read this, even if it is not very explicit, this chapter definitely deserves the M rating.
Chapter 29
Ohma D'un, a few hours later.
Ben stretched out his long legs in front of him and closed his eyes to enjoy the light breeze blowing over one of the hills where he and Rey were. Overlooking the Resistance base, it was one of the first in the valley to be bathed in light when the sun came up.
Their return from Lianna had taken place in a morbid silence. Without even thinking of retrieving the ship they had come in, the Resistance had returned to Ohma D'un, the death of the spy hovering over their heads like the worst omen. As soon as the Falcon had landed, Rey had escaped without a word or a glance for her friends or the corpse of the woman they had covered with a blanket. No one had thought to hold them back or follow them, and it had been a relief to Ben. Running as they climbed up the green expanses, the clean, fresh morning air invigorating them. Yet neither of them paid any attention to the grandiose spectacle of nature that was awakening. Rey had collapsed against him as soon as they had reached the peak.
He had been puzzled by the grief that had overwhelmed her, for though the spy's death had been sudden, Ben felt no guilt about it, he considered her responsible for her fate. His thought had angered Rey, and furiously, she had closed the bond, throwing him out of her mind angrily.
In the end Ben had been caught up in the guilt. He had expected her to leave after that, leaving him definitely alone, but she had stayed. Sitting cross-legged next to him, she finally leaned on his shoulder, looking for the warmth of his arms. He had hastened to hold her against him, and together they had abandoned themselves to the contemplation of the dying dawn.
After months of sharing the slightest thought, the smallest impression, the silence of their bond troubled him.
"Speak to me. Please."
"I have nothing to say."
She seemed to fall back into her silence for a few moments, before turning halfway towards him.
"Ben... What if they're right?"
So it wasn't only the death of this woman that troubled her. He himself kept thinking back to the events that had taken place in that cave.
"You mustn't pay attention to what they said, they are fanatics, extremists. They exploit weak minds. Those who are frightened and narrow-minded. They needed a scapegoat for their weakness and they found one."
"But their words make sense! So many wars, so many crimes have been committed by Force sensitive and in its name!"
"I could give you lots of examples where normal people have committed crimes, but you will again accuse me of bragging," he joked, trying to lighten the mood.
But Rey wasn't laughing at all.
"See ? You say it too, normal, as if feeling the Force made us superior beings, or different!"
"But we are different! The Force may bind every living being, but we are the only ones who perceive it, which makes us superior and that's what makes them afraid!"
"It's terribly egocentric to say such a thing."
Ben shrugged his shoulders and shifted to face her.
"It's the truth."
"I'm not sure."
After that she plunged back into her thoughts and her face became cold and inexpressive. Ben sighed and then began to pull out blades of grass violently. He didn't immediately realize that she had reopened the bond, but when her distress reached him, he froze and listened sadly to her thoughts.
"Don't say that," he said after he heard her wish that she had never received the gift of the Force.
She turned away from him, seemed desperate. What must I do to comfort you, he thought bitterly. Tell me, I can't bear to see you like this. But other words came out instead.
"How can you think that? Without the Force you would still be on Jakku, you wouldn't have met your friends, we would never have met ... You would never have saved me ... Rey without the Force we wouldn't share this ..."
He made a gesture towards her, then towards him, mimicking their silent conversations, their precious bond, the relationship they had.
She tried to speak. Several times. But her words got stuck in her throat, and with a sob she got up and started to walk away. Ben ran to catch her. He was relieved to see that she didn't really want to get away from him because she gave in to his embrace as soon as he was behind her. He held her tightly, maybe he even hurt her, but he wanted to anchor her in the present. He couldn't let her doubt the Force, or him, or them. She didn't seem to complain, and with one hand she drew his face and he kissed her, before letting her catch her breath, tears still streaming down her cheeks. He put his head on her neck, giving her all the time she needed to express herself.
"Sorry... It's just that sometimes... Sometimes... no I can't..."
"Please tell me, don't hide, you know I won't judge you."
How could he? She knew all his darkest secrets. Whatever shameful thought she was hiding, she would never reach the darkness he was sailing into before she came into his life.
"Sometimes ... I wish I hadn't been chosen by this power, by the Force ... I wish I hadn't been who I am ... I would have had a family, a normal and happy life ... And I hate myself for thinking that ... because today I have a family ... I have you Ben, and I am happy ... It's horrible isn't it? I'm sorry..."
He turned her over in his arms to face him.
"Rey, there is nothing to forgive. Many times I have also dreamed of having another life, another family. Don't blame yourself for that. Look at me."
He took her face in his hands and lifted it up so that their eyes met. There was only them at that moment.
You and me, he whispered in the bond. She closed her eyes to signify her agreement and he kissed her gently.
"I will never be able to give you what you lacked in your childhood," he began in a solemn voice, "but I promise to do everything I can to make sure you lack nothing in the future."
New tears dampened her cheeks and he grew worried that he had said something wrong.
"Oh Ben."
This time she kissed him and hung on to his neck. They hugged each other for a long time and then they walked slowly along the stone paths.
"You're still preoccupied," he said, concerned.
Rey didn't answer right away, her gaze wandering off in the distance.
"Have you ever wondered what you'd like to do after all this?"
The question caught him off guard. He thought she was going to tell him more about the Eghalist, or the Force. But not about the future.
Of course he'd already thought about it. More than once lately. In his mind appeared briefly the image of a house on Naboo or a place similar. Lakes and rivers all around, and even the sea in the distance. Water, oh Force, water everywhere, she would never again have to experience the desert and loneliness. The vision of a family. Children perhaps. Later on. Much later. She was still young. But he loved her so much that he couldn't help dreaming about a future with her. He shook his head and chased away those sweet dreams before his concentration betrayed him and she perceived them. He didn't want to frighten her, or drive her away.
"I spent years imagining and dreaming things. I try to live in the moment now," Ben lied.
"Oh. I see," Rey nodded.
"Do you?"
"No."
He really didn't like that sad look she kept giving him.
"Would you want to resurrect the Jedi Order?"
She frowned before bursting into laughter at his incongruous suggestion. He imitated her, relieved to see her finally smile.
"What a strange idea," she said after her hilarity had ceased.
"I thought I'd heard you think that one day."
"Ah, I see. Yes, after the Doge of Malastare called me Master, I imagined myself following in Luke's footsteps. For a while. After what happened with Finn I realized what a bad idea it was."
"Why that? I'm sure you'd be a great teacher."
She giggled again before replying sarcastically.
"Stop it. I have no patience. Besides, how would I train someone when I have only been taught incompletely. I have learned more about the Force from books and you. I doubt I can teach it to anyone."
"That's right. But you are good. And for that matter, Luke never received the complete and official teachings of the old Order. Everything he learned and passed on to, came from few moments with his master and from these books as well. It's not that different."
She meditated for a moment on his words and then continued:
"You would be a good master."
Ben winced. As Finn had wished, he had not yet revealed to her that he was teaching him some of the ways of the Force. But if Rey's friend had been present at that moment, Ben was sure that he wouldn't have agreed with her about his teaching skills.
"Did you hear what I said about Luke and his knowledge? What makes me more legitimate than him? And then really, establishing a new generation of Jedi with the help of the former Supreme Leader? Do you have any other brilliant ideas like that?"
"Ben I'm serious."
"Come on, Rey. Even if I wanted to, which I don't," he hastened to add, "no one would ever accept. And I'm not a Jedi. I could have been once, but... No, I'm not."
"The more time passes the less I consider myself a Jedi too."
"Well, I won't complain about it, 'cause I'm pretty sure the Jedi weren't allowed to do that."
He suddenly grabbed her by the waist and her protests died when he nipped her neck before kissing her. She moaned with pleasure as she ran her fingers through his hair. But she didn't let herself be distracted for long, because she was already freeing herself from the embrace and started walking again, looking as preoccupied as ever. He followed her silently.
"I was serious before, you know. I'm afraid they're right. When I see where I come from, who was ... my grandfather ... all the evil he did, I wonder if the Force isn't dangerous..."
"There are cruel and dangerous beings all over the Galaxy, and they don't need the Force for that. Don't be fooled!"
"So you also think I'm a weak and narrow spirit?"
"I never said that. You're twisting my words. You're not weak, Rey, you're the most incredible person I know. But you feel guilty for being what you are, you shouldn't! You're worth much more than all those lunatics trembling with fear at what they don't understand!"
"Stop it, stop always comparing me and putting me on a pedestal. Ben, don't you understand? You're doing exactly what they blame us for. You think you're superior to them!"
This time Ben stopped and frowned.
"Because I am."
"Well you shouldn't think that."
"What's the point of hiding it, it's the truth. I told you I'm not a Jedi, I won't hide my talents behind false humility. Call it arrogance if you want, it doesn't change anything."
"It's unfair, why should we be stronger, more predisposed?"
"That's the way the Force goes. Nature is not equal, it never will be. It finds its balance in inequality. Wanting to change that is futile."
"But not everyone thinks like that. There will always be beings who want to rise up and dominate."
"And they don't need the Force for that. Yes, there will always be evil and dangerous beings. That's why the Jedi Order was created. But even with the best of intentions, you saw how well that turned out."
She wasn't listening to him. He could see it, her thoughts went on and on about the speeches and the murders of the Eghalist, about the dead spy, about the Force and the place she herself occupied in the middle of it all.
"The Force frightens me," she ended up saying. "What I can do with it, what others will try to do with it. I used to think it was something incredible ... now... I'm afraid of it."
"Rey ..."
But he stopped before he finished his sentence because someone from far away was running up. Rose, judging by the colours of her cheeks and her erratic breathing, had just crossed the base and climbed all the hills in record time.
"Hurry... Come..." She said, breathing with difficulty. "Something happened!"
/
/
The old blonde woman looked at him in disgust through the holographic screen projecting her silhouette from the central deck of her destroyer.
"One could say she got you," Engell said to him.
He cringed at the unpleasant comment and the sudden tension of his skin sent a shock of pain.
"And you're the one saying this," he said, looking at her face, which was at least as ravaged by the flames as his own had been by the powers of the Jedi.
The woman sneered and Skæn chuckled inwardly. He had offended her.
"Your troops arrived too late, they managed to escape," he exclaimed.
"If you had warned me earlier we could have apprehended her! You knew she was coming though!"
"I don't need lecturing! We'll have to speed up our plans. Prepare the message I sent you, it is time the Galaxy knew that the New Order will be born."
"I won't let it happen! An alliance with the Resistance? Are you out of your mind?"
"As soon as they fall in line, we will destroy them. This treaty they have created, these United Galactic Systems, they are a threat to our expansion plans, we must make them believe that we are ready to make peace. We cannot let them recruit other systems to their cause!"
"They will never take the bait!"
"Then it is up to you to be convincing! The Resistance is still weak, its members are tired of fighting. Dameron doesn't have the strength of Organa, they will be easy to impress. And with what we ask them in exchange, it will be too tempting for them to accept."
"And what about the Jedi...?" she asked after a while, uncertain.
"What about her?"
"Is it really true? I mean... I'd heard rumours, echoes of soldiers having served under Ren, but I never... I never thought it was true..."
He leaned towards the screen and held back from smiling to avoid straining his burnt skin.
"It is. That's why I'm asking you to divulge it. We will break them from the inside."
"How could you get such information? If it turns out you were wrong we will lose all credibility!"
"Do you doubt me?"
"It's not ..."
"Then do as I ask," he cut her off.
She was about to protest, when someone knocked on the door. He allowed access to his office by recognizing the person.
"Sir. General Coderex is calling you you from the Requiem," whispered his second in command, who had just entered.
"Make him wait."
"He ... insists."
The leader of the Eghalist sighed wearily, unhappy to be interrupted in this way, but he had some business to settle with Coderex, and Engell was beginning to annoy him.
"Very well, then. We will continue our discussion later, Supreme Leader."
"Watch your attitude. Don't forget who you are talking to."
"I can only return the advice. The New Order is not yet in control of the Galaxy, you may control armies, but I control people."
/
/
The something that Rose was talking about, was in fact a message from the First Order, broadcast over all of UGS's linked military communication networks. It had been received in the morning, and Naboo and a few other systems were quick to contact the Resistance to demand explanations.
The day after the creation of the charter, a scandal was already threatening to strike at their fragile new alliance. Rose had been unable to give them any further explanations as Poe was waiting for the whole chain of command to be present to listen to it.
When they crossed the threshold of the Great Hall, a wind of anger was blowing among the members of the Resistance. Poe and Finn were trying to calm the heated minds that were trying to find out why their leaders had fled on a perilous mission like fickle children, said Rose in an annoyed tone.
They had just begun to climb the stairs to Poe's office, when Rey perceived unpleasant comments about them. It wasn't unusual, but they seemed particularly vehement this morning. Ben, who usually didn't pay attention to them either, turned around several times and glanced at those who had just spoken.
When they arrived in the corridors leading to the offices and other strategic rooms in the chain of command, the murmurs of conversation faded away, leaving only the clear sound of their footsteps on the marble floor. The largest of the meeting rooms was full to bursting point, and Rey, finding no place to sit, leaned against a wall in the distance with Ben. Conversations were going well and everyone was trying to be discreet, but Rey noticed the occasional glance that was cast at her.
Come on. What have I done now? she growled in the bond.
It's not you, he replied. Something strange is going on.
Poe arrived with Finn a few moments later, both of them looking prodigiously upset. They asked for silence, and Connix stood up and activated several commands before broadcasting the long-awaited message. The image of a woman appeared on the glass screens, but it looked nothing like the holo they had been shown the day they had heard the news of the return of the First Order. Half of her face seemed to have melted away, and one could barely make out an eye under a heap of pale skin. Her appearance didn't seem to bother her at all for she was speaking in a strong and authoritative voice. Ben sneered as he contemplated what had become his former subordinate.
"Dear members of the United Galactic Systems organization. I am General Amret Engell ..."
Rey immediately found the woman unpleasant, and was soon disgusted with the pompous and ridiculous speech she was making. She did not have the panache and grandiloquence of Hux for sure, but she sounded just as bad. Her mind went back to what was bothering her and what was far more important to her than what the new Supreme Leader might have to say. The threat of the Eghalist, for example, since the day before, worried her more than the First Order, or rather the New Order of what Rey had just understood.
How original, she scoffed.
She couldn't take the news seriously. They'd beaten them once, they'd only have to do it again. This Engell could rename the First Order all she wanted, but there were still tormentors, dictators who were ready to enslave systems of the galaxy, no matter what this General said. There was nothing new in all this. The Eghalist, on the other hand, was a threat on a different scale. It wasn't about an army of masked soldiers, it was about civilians, the very people they were fighting for their freedom and security. Knowing that these people feared and hated her and everything she stood for, continued to make her desperate. She almost expected Ben to correct her in a very selfish desire to be comforted by the other half of her soul, but the latter was absorbed in the General's speech. The moment Rey decided to pay attention to what she was saying, a familiar name surprised her.
"The UGS and the Resistance have chosen to protect the criminal Kylo Ren. But his fate belongs to the New Order. He led to its demise and betrayed our cause by associating himself with abominations of the Force and almost failing to bring the galaxy under the yoke of a man who called himself the Emperor. No evidence of the resurrection of this scourge has ever been provided. We now know that this imaginary threat was only Kylo Ren's work to scare the free systems."
"Is she really trying to make us believe that she wasn't on his side? She doesn't expect people to believe that," laughed Rey.
But no one seemed to share her hilarity.
Don't worry, I'm not going to let them hand you over, she assured Ben with a gentle squeeze on his arm.
Maybe it's better that way.
Ben! What's wrong with you?
She seems to be proposing an alliance. I don't want to be the only obstacle between that and peace, Rey.
As if you didn't know it was a trap, come on? You told us how treacherous she was!
He didn't answer, and a new wave of anxiety came over Rey. The however awful death of the spy was far behind in the horrors that the next few hours would bring. Because if Ben thought about giving himself up ... then he was ready to abandon her. Her heart missed a few beats under the weight of this realization and she leaned more firmly against the wall to regain her composure. He placed an arm around her waist to hold her close to him.
I will not abandon you. Never.
Then stop saying such things.
"We are ready for peace. We no longer want to perpetrate useless wars, and we agree to deal with the independent organization called the Resistance, and this new Alliance that you have created... On the sole condition that they hand over the criminal Kylo Ren to us. Force-sensitive abominations of his kind have no place in this new era that we will create together. They are too dangerous to be left free. We know, however, that this criminal is protected by the young Jedi, your hero from the Battle of Exegol."
You can be sure he's protected, you crazy bitch.
"This heroine, is in fact an impostor..."
Rey frowned.
What the kriff ...
"... You might think that I am trying to slander her in order to confuse you. Then accept this proof of our good faith, by witnessing the true nature of your Jedi."
The General disappeared from the holo, and instead a dark scene filmed from above appeared. It was a crowd, about a thousand people. A space had been freed up in its centre, forming a circle in the mass of people clustered around two silhouettes.
The view changed and Rey was able to distinguish herself, her face impassive, grasping the hand of the leader of the Eghalist. Immediately her hazelnut eyes took on the dreaded yellow color. A few seconds later, the whole room was startled when her lightning flashed from her fingers and escaped to the roof. Rey contemplated the images in disbelief, as if a complete stranger were in her place at that moment. The holocams hadn't lost a second of the show. Faces distorted by terror appeared as the audience tried to escape from the collapsing place. The screams of horror resounded in the meeting room and Rey was back in the same cave a few hours earlier. The air was getting scarcer, she felt oppressed again. She saw herself being violently jostled by people while looking for her saber, the light of the flashes on the ceiling still slightly illuminated her face. She could see the fear but also the determination as she climbed on a person to get more air. She was indeed the abomination Engell was talking about. She had done this. She was responsible for it.
It was an accident! They wouldn't hesitate to kill us! You did the right thing!
She didn't believe it for a second. The voice of the General returned.
"This is the one in whom you placed all your hopes. She is nothing but a monster. And how could it be so when you know where she comes from. My men investigated the secret she was trying to hide from the public eye, but the hour of revelation has come. The Emperor may not have returned, but he didn't need to, because you have his descendant on your side. Your Jedi is the descendant of the Emperor, she is the granddaughter of Palpatine. I know it may seem implausible, but the facts are there. She shares his powers and his darkness, as you have seen. She is dangerous. She will have to suffer the same fate as the criminal she seeks to protect. It is not difficult to understand why."
Rey had never felt so humiliated in her entire life, and yet she had had her share of humiliations on Jakku. But what she was going through at that moment was worse than anything she had ever experienced. She felt dirty, she wanted to run and never look back. Disappear forever. But she didn't move one bit. She felt the disbelief and disgust from everyone present, and the looks of surprise and horror from her friends. Only Finn had turned his head away. Ben supported her with one hand around her waist, which was good because she was about to faint. The horrible secret that had stained all she thought she was, had just come out into the open.
"If the Resistance persists in wanting to hide and protect these two beings, we won't be able to consider any form of negotiation and peace. There will be wars and losses on both sides. But we cannot allow these monsters to live on. And ..."
The room screamed as Ben threw his saber into the glass screen. The matter exploded and shattered, throwing sharp fragments into a spray of sparks. No one thought to protest or reprimand him. Only the crackle of the destroyed holographic projector disturbed the now angry and incredulous silence.
"Rey," Poe finally said in a small voice. "It ... It ain't true, is it?"
She couldn't answer anything. What could she say? She couldn't hide it anymore. She was no longer the last Jedi, nor the scavenger of Jakku. That Rey died this morning. She was and would remain Rey Palpatine now. Descendant of the Emperor. Horror froze her and in a desire to protect herself, she used the Force to cut herself off from the sounds and thoughts around her. Only the bond substituted, and still anchored her to the present.
You are much more than that Rey. Stay with me, it doesn't change anything. It's alright.
But it wasn't all right, and Ben must have felt it because he was tightening his grip on her waist even more.
"Well, we all know what we have to do."
The captain of the pilots had just spoken and Rey had a fleeting memory of a similar situation deep in the jungle months before when Ben's life was at stake. Nothing had changed apparently. Everyone turned to them, and Rey didn't immediately understand what was going on, but she could feel Ben's anger. He suddenly let go of her waist and stood in front of her, protecting her with his massive body.
"You wouldn't dare," he scolded.
Rey saw him reach out his hand and the saber he had thrown against the screen, slammed back into his palm. He immediately turned it on and the resistance fighters retreated at the sight of the blue blade.
"It's a logical choice, it's you they want after all!" shouted a man on their right.
"You piece of ..."
Ben ran, his saber drawn, and Rey had to use the Force to stop him in his move. He froze, his arms raised, an expression of hatred on his face. Everyone had backed off and blasters were brought out.
Ben! What's the matter with you?
Don't you understand? They want to hand us over!
What ...
Finn and Poe, who had not yet reacted, leapt up and stood between Ben and the group.
"Everybody will stay calm! Solo stop this immediately," Poe grunted.
Rey relaxed the pressure she was exerting, but Ben didn't put away his saber for all that.
"He's dangerous!"
"They both are! Do you remember what she did at the prison?"
"Who knows what really happened on Exegol?"
"General, we have a chance to avoid a fight!"
"It was a way to infiltrate her lover in our base! She fooled us all!"
Shouts of protest erupted from every corner of the room and Rey was stunned to feel so much fear in their minds. They didn't trust her.
"No, no! Wait! That's exactly what they want! Cause trouble between us! Finn exclaimed.
"Just try to come closer!" Ben growled as he threatened them.
"STOP!" cried Poe and Connix in one voice.
"No decision will be made hastily, and we mustn't ... Ben what are you doing?" asked the General's second.
He had finally turned off his saber and without a word he rushed to the door, taking Rey with him.
Ben... she said as she followed him in confusion.
"Catch them!"
Ben, but wait!
"Are you going to let them escape?"
"Poe, we have to accept that offer!"
"No one will trade anyone!"
"Rey! Ben! Come back!"
BEN!
But he didn't let go and didn't slow down until he reached the end of the corridor. The entrance to the Great Hall was now empty, all the others seemed to have left. Ben took them down the huge stairs before heading towards Rey's quarters. The latter was struggling to follow his long strides but took advantage of the fact that they were alone to demand explanations.
"What are you doing?"
"If you think I'm going to wait for us to be turned over!"
"I..."
"I should have known this would happen!"
"But how did she find out ...?"
"It doesn't matter!"
"Maybe not for you... But you saw the way they looked at me..."
"Remember when you asked me if I really wanted to be there?"
"Yes ...?"
"Well I think it's time to go."
/
/
A few hours later.
"We can't do that!"
"We should have run away a long time ago," Ben repeated.
Rey had protested again and again as he took her to her quarters to take refuge until nightfall. He understood her hesitation and her fears, she didn't want to abandon her friends whom she considered her family, but they were no longer able to protect her, and Ben didn't want to see her suffer the humiliation of betrayal again.
"It would only make things worse!" She cried, holding him by the arm.
"I don't see how it could get any worse," he replied abruptly. "Don't you understand ? She succeeded, we'll be outcasts from now on ! I mean, it was already the case for me, but I don't want you to be treated like a criminal!"
"And how do you think we will be treated if we run away like thieves?"
"I won't let them hand you over to the First Order! Nor to those fanatics!"
He turned his back on her so that she wouldn't see him as he tried, with difficulty, to regain his calm. He had come very close to breaking down and hurting someone in that damned meeting.
Ben laid down on the floor of the ship they were planning to borrow, the meagre possessions he had amassed during the few months of captivity within the Resistance, and then Rey's, which were not much more numerous. The sabers of his mother and uncle, some clothes, dehydrated rations and two water canteens joined the sacred texts of the Jedis, their most precious belongings.
"I have something to take care of first, I won't be long."
She didn't answer and he watched her sit on the co-pilot's seat, a miserable look on her face. They had to leavee as quickly as possible. Ben wanted to get her out of this poisonous environment where those in her side were considering handing her over to save their skins.
Could they be blamed, had seemed to ask Dameron before they left the command headquarters. They were doing what they thought was right, but it made no difference to Ben. He blamed them shamelessly. They had hurt Rey. A fact he didn't forgive easily.
He left the ship without a sound and was careful to avoid the patrols and pilots in the hangar even though it was late. He was surprised that nobody had noticed them yet, but he didn't want to push his luck, and ran off into the night, dimly lit by a moon in the distance of Naboo and Ohma D'un. With the help of the Force he went unnoticed and soon reached the agreed meeting place. With a wave of his hand he knocked the few guards on duty unconscious, and, making sure that no holocams were on, Ben walked into the dark corridors of the Great Hall.
A woman was standing at the end of a corner. She greeted him with a stern look and Ben suddenly felt like a child about to be punished by his mother. Something that hadn't happened for a long time.
"You're late Solo."
"Rey wasn't easy to convince."
"How is she ?"
"How do you think?"
"Poe will never let things get this far. Are you sure you're doing the right thing?"
"It's the only way."
"It's terrible."
"Did you get what I asked for?"
"Of course. It wasn't easy, but there was indeed a planet called Sorgan in our archives."
"I knew it. Did you erase it afterwards?"
"Who do you think I am?"
"I'd rather be careful, I don't want anyone chasing us!"
"Not everyone is like you."
They remained silent, gauging each other's eyes. Despite her small size he had always admired her confidence and the natural authority of her gaze. She reminded him of his mother. Which was not surprising since she had been her second for a long time. The bond between Connix and Leia Organa had saved Ben on more than one occasion, which is why he had asked for her help tonight.
"What about Malastare's officers?" he asked.
"What about them?"
"I have your word that they will be well treated?"
"They will be transferred to Naboo, their fate will depend only on them."
Ben nodded his head and again a silence stretched between them.
"Thank you," he said at last.
"I'm doing it for Rey, and out of respect for your mother."
"Thank you anyway. Dameron will make you pay for it."
"Probably. Now, hurry up."
She handed him a little box with the coordinates he'd asked for. He nodded his head and turned around to go back to the hangars. He had almost reached the ship when he felt someone approaching. He took a few steps before he guessed who was there. A presence that had become familiar to him lately.
"Finn," he greeted him as calmly as he could, as he stood in front of an aircraft he was about to steal.
"I knew you would run away one day," was the General's only answer.
Ben refrained from raising his eyebrows in surprise, there was no anger or evil intention in Finn's mind, the Force sent him back only a wave of sadness and disappointment.
"I should have known that you would come and stick your nose in what doesn't concern you," he said, preferring to remain alert.
"You shouldn't have taught me the Force if you didn't want me to use it!"
"It's none of your business, step aside Finn."
"I can't let you do this. How can you do this to Rey? You just..."
Finn suddenly closed his eyes and his head turned towards the ship as if he felt the presence of the young woman. Re-opening them, he seemed to have understood what was happening. The look in his eyes caused Ben to say something he had never thought possible.
"You have been a good student."
The remark surprised him deeply and a strange realization passed between them. They would never like each other, that was a fact. But the hatred was no longer there tonight. At least not much.
"So you are both leaving," the young General finally said.
"We have to."
"We will protect you!"
"Like earlier? How long will it be before they come looking for us and endanger the whole Resistance? Or worse. You and Dameron won't be able to alienate your men for us."
"By leaving in this way you prove them right, you show them that Force sensitive are dangerous !"
"It's better this way. I'm not going to risk Rey's life and well-being by leaving her waiting here for someone to hand her over. We'll come back when things settle down."
"What if it never happens? You won't be able to hide forever."
Ben couldn't find anything to answer. He couldn't see the future, but he knew it would get worse if they stayed here.
"Are you going to stop us?"
"I'm not an idiot. I know you could beat me easily."
"That's the most reasonable thing you've ever said, Finn."
"You were just starting to teach me," he replied abruptly.
Ben, surprised, raised his eyebrow again.
"I thought you hated it."
"I do, but ..."
Again this strange feeling of understanding passed between them. He turned to Finn, then hesitated before placing a hand on his shoulder.
"Continue what we have seen together, meditate and reach with your mind, seek us in the Force and we will answer your calls."
Without waiting for the young man to answer, he turned around and headed for the ship.
"Hey Ben?"
He froze.
"You'll take care of her, right?"
"Of course I will."
"May the Force be with you both."
"May the Force be with you, Finn."
/
/
The Requiem, Outer Rim.
"A public execution? What the hell were you thinking? You're turning into an Inquisitor of the Empire!"
General Modi Coderex trembled with rage in front of his ally, although the word now seemed exaggerated as the two men had been at odds lately.
"Come on Coderex you seem surprised?"
Surprised was an understatement, he felt as if he didn't know a single proven fact about the identity of his interlocutor.
"You never told me your story. You never told me what happened to your parents."
"You never told me who destroyed your family either."
"Your parents were killed by the Knights of Ren."
"In a way they were."
"Don't you think that's something you should have told me?"
"I'm not bragging about it."
"But talking about it in front of thousands of people wasn't a big deal."
"What do you want Coderex?"
"You've told me over and over again that Kylo Ren was of no importance in this fight..."
"And it's true."
"Kylo Ren! Kylo fucking R-E-N! Are you kidding me? He was one of those who killed your family! None of the other Knights have been seen for months, but he's alive and you're trying to tell me you don't want revenge ?"
"Not everyone is driven by personal motives, General. I think first of all we will be able to achieve."
"I knew I was wrong about you."
The General hung up the communication violently and had one of his lieutenants called. One of his most trusted men soon arrived. He liked this soldier. He was a father, a former smuggler who had turned to security. He had served in the Alliance alongside Mon Mothma before leaving it after the fall of the Empire. Coderex explained his plan and his doubts to him, and the man accepted the spying mission with enthusiasm.
"He is not who he claims to be," he felt obliged to add.
"If he has something to hide I will find out, Sir."
"Be careful."
As he watched the man leave his office, he angrily threw his datapad across the room, blaming his stupidity for not immediately seeing what kind of man this ally he had engaged with, was. His bodyguards stood by his side, uncertain and uneasy in the face of their superior's anger. One of them, a young Twi'lek, whispered discreetly.
"What did you say," Coderex shouted dryly.
"Well Sir... spying on him sounds drastic, doesn't it? What if he... what if he's not necessarily hiding something? After all he was raised in the precepts of the Church of the Force... He may not believe in the concept of vengeance..."
"If he didn't believe in it," he cut him off, "he wouldn't have taken the lead of the Eghalist. He is lying. No sane person would remain calm about the massacre of his family."
"No one," Coderex repeated in a whisper.
/
/
Hydian Hyperspace Road. Two days later.
Ben knocked once again on the ship's cabin door but got no answer. They had been travelling across the Galaxy for two days to reach the planet where they would hide. After reaching Rey, Ben had hurried to get the ship off the ground and entered the coordinates that Connix had given him.
He asked the commander to search the Rebel Alliance archives for a distant planet that his father had told him about when he was younger. An isolated planet, poor, perfect for disappearing. For he and Rey were now fugitives.
Rey ...
Two days earlier, the young woman had locked herself in one of the ship's cabins, and never came out. She had closed herself off from their bond, from the Force, from his thoughts, from Ben...
If he had at first wanted to give her time to regain her self-control, he had then very quickly lost patience, and only the immense respect and affection he had for her prevented him from breaking down the door to confront her.
Two days she had left him without news, and without the Force he would even have wondered if she hadn't left the ship.
Two days that Ben hadn't slept and walked back and forth between her cabin door and the cockpit, watching their paths, changing them from time to time to make sure they hadn't been followed.
Two days he missed her terribly.
He didn't understand her reaction. At first he had thought that the forced flight he had imposed on her was too hard for her, but it wasn't even about that. The death of the spy, the confrontation with the Eghalists and finally the revelation of her identity had plunged Rey into a maelstrom of emotions she could no longer control.
Ben was now on the verge of going mad. He was trying to convince himself that everything would work out once they reached their destination, but after two days without her, he couldn't believe it anymore.
In despair, he made a decision he hadn't made in a long time. He first checked the dashboard, and seeing that they only had a few hours of travel time left, he sent a message on one of Connix's comlinks to warn them that they would be arriving soon. They may have left the Resistance abruptly, but Ben still had an ounce of respect left, to at least warn Rey's friends that they were safe. He doubted very much that anyone would come looking for them there, and he counted on their discretion to keep the location of their hiding place secret. Then he went to the other cabin and sat down on one of the beds.
There he closed his eyes and called his uncle for help.
He never thought he would have to ask Luke Skywalker for anything in his life but there were sacrifices he was willing to make for Rey. The questions she was asking herself, the doubts she had, Ben didn't know how to answer them, or how to help her. She needed a Jedi master, a mentor, a guide, Ben had been foolish to believe he could fill those roles, and it made him desperate. So maybe the Jedi who had trained both of them could give him some good advice.
"Luke. Be with me."
He waited a little longer before repeating his call.
"Luke. I need you."
Long minutes went by without any answer. His uncle had never stopped disappointing him, so why should it be any different now? Ben was not worthy of help, he would never go back into the light, not completely.
"You coward!" he shouted. "You said you would haunt me for the rest of my life! You couldn't even do that! You were never there for me!"
He opened his eyes again and jumped off the bed, before throwing his fist into one of the metal walls of the room. The pain made him wince but eased his anger somewhat.
"Luke I need you ... It's not for me, it's for her, it's always been for her..."
He slipped to the ground, now overcome by exhaustion and despair.
"Help her," he begged one last time before falling asleep.
/
Huge green plains and snow-covered forests appeared to him. Rey was there too. She was always there with him.
"I love you Ben," she whispered to him.
Her mouth on his, her loose hair waving between his fingers, her body against his. Ben was never happier than in his dreams, because only in his dreams was she ever saying such a thing to him. He didn't imagine for a moment that it was true, but safe in his mind, he dared to believe it was.
"I love you so much," he replied eagerly.
He couldn't help but touch her, her skin sending electroshocks throughout his whole being. The hold she had on him in his dreams was so strong that it was almost painful. A pain that he welcomed with delight.
"Ben ... Ben ..."
But suddenly the pain was so great that he opened his eyes with a start. There was no more snow, no more plain, no more Rey ...
He was no longer in his dream, there was only pain, cries, loneliness. He jumped when he realized that the bond had reopened, that the cries he heard were in fact alarms from the ship signifying a major breakdown.
He jumped up from the ground where he had fallen asleep completely exhausted, a few hours earlier.
Ben started running through the corridors. He didn't stop at Rey's cabin, he felt that she wasn't there anymore.
As always he let the presence of the woman guide him. He could have found her with his eyes closed, he would always find her. Through the side portholes of the ship he could see that they were close to the planet, but they were arriving way too fast. The ship was losing altitude and plunging at a frightening speed. Worse than anything else, they seemed to have gone through a storm as lightning bolts ran through the structure of their ship, disrupting the navigation instruments, and probably responsible for the failure. As Ben rushed towards the cockpit to prevent them from crashing, he was struck by the realization. There was no storm, the lightnings were coming from the ship.
Rey.
The relief of knowing that she was out of the cabin and reconnected to him distracted him for a moment from the gravity of the situation before he was startled when lightning struck him on the side.
"Rey!"
He reached the cockpit and in the pilot's seat she was there.
"Rey stops!" he shouted.
She didn't answer. With her fingers stretched out towards the controls he could see her smile, a bad grin disfiguring her beautiful face.
"Rey please, no!"
The dashboard and aircraft controls had broken down and black smoke began to come out of the nose, masking the cockpit windows.
Ben didn't know what to do, he didn't want to hurt her but they were going to crash, he had to do something. He knelt down beside her, catching up as best he could as the ship tilted more and more. He grabbed her arm and begged her again.
"Rey, sweetheart, stop, you're going to kill us both, please stop!"
At last she turned around and stared at him with her yellow eyes. The cavernous voice with which she spoke terrified him.
"Kneel before your Empress."
He would have bowed down without hesitation at the slightest of her desires, she was and would remain a Queen in his eyes. But if he didn't do something quickly, there would be little left of the ship, or of them. He made a gesture and his mother's saber leapt out of his bag and landed in his hand, he immediately ignited it and a blue light lit up Rey's face.
His gesture annoyed her, but it had the effect of making her stop the lightning. Immediately the ship regained altitude and stabilized. But Ben had to retreat because Rey was moving to attack. It saddened him to see her like this, lost in her terror and anger. It was all his fault, he should never have forced her to run away, he was only hurting her. He turned off his saber. He couldn't fight her, not any more.
But she still interpreted his gesture as a threat and jumped on him. Ben, surprised, stepped back and fell backwards with the weight of her body.
Rey held him down with her legs around his, then began to scratch him and hit him on his chest and face. He stopped her as best he could, fearing that she would flash her lightning again at any moment, before she took his breath away by wrapping her hands around his neck. She brought her face closer to his and growled. A guttural sound that made Ben shiver with all his being. She was so close now, he could smell the scent of the recycled air from the ship, and something else, hers.
Forgetting for a moment the danger of the situation he was in, he straightened up and captured her lips. She bit his, but Ben held on. He could now taste the blood in his mouth, she was hurting him.
As soon as he had mentioned the thought, she let him go. She backed away sharply, a horrified expression on her face as her eyes returned to their usual hazelnut colour.
He wiped the beading blood from his lip, and he saw her do the same. Rey seemed shocked by what she had just done, her gaze moving from the controls of the ship, to him.
Ben, for his part, was completely helpless. At that moment he didn't know what to do. He wasn't strong enough for her, he had never been strong enough to protect those he loved. Ben Solo and Kylo Ren knew only how to destroy. She was afraid of being a monster? But as she had once told him, he was the monster. He couldn't even protect her from herself. He would have liked to understand how to help her, how to calm her fears that were turning against her.
She knelt down beside him and knocked timidly at the door of his mind. The bond was reopened and both of them took a deep breath as the Force vibrated between them again, finally soothed. He perceived through the bond her wish to curl up against him.
"I'm sorry," she says, caressing his bruised lip.
"I'm the one who's sorry," Ben replied, darkly. "I'm an idiot. I promised your friends that I would take care of you. It's only been two days since we left and look at you."
"It has nothing to do with you. I am scared. I am terrified that something will happen to them because of me. And I'm so ashamed that they know the truth, that they know I'm a monster... The voices came back and... I mean I'm sorry... Please forgive me."
"There is nothing to forgive."
He looked away from Rey's tear-stained eyes, he couldn't bear to know she was sad because of him. Again.
"Or rather yes," he said. "I hope you can forgive my weakness. It's all my fault, I'm a mess. If I wasn't who I am, none of this would have happened, and now I can't even protect you! I don't deserve you Rey, I..."
"I love you Ben," she cut him off, taking his face in her hands.
He remained motionless, his eyes wide open at what she had just said.
What ...
"I don't know why I didn't tell you sooner. I think I was afraid... of those words, of what they mean... I've never said that to anyone... But I love you Ben, I love you so much."
"Only the Force knows that I realized this a long time ago, I think I love you from that day on Kef Bir when I thought I killed you, or maybe when you destroyed Snoke and we fought together. Or when you came to save me from Palpatine. I don't know, I just know that I love you, and seeing you beat yourself up like that breaks my heart."
"You are not weak, you are the strongest man I know, and not only physically, although you and I know that there are few men who are so... massive."
She had put one hand on his chest and clutched his tunic between her fingers. Ben still hadn't spoken. He couldn't think anymore. It wasn't true, she couldn't have said that. He was still dreaming.
"You protect me so much," Rey continued. "You have no idea what you're doing for me, I'd like to show you, without you Ben I would have been lost long ago. It's inconceivable for me to be separated from you. But please stop blaming yourself for things that are not of your doing. I love you, do you hear me?"
Rey leaned towards him and put her lips gently against his.
I love you, she repeated in the bond this time.
Ben thought he was going to faint. Could it be true? Did she really love him? How could a woman as exceptional as she could love him? He may have sensed her attachment and need for him, but he would never have dared to imagine there was more to it than that. Shocked by her statement, Ben couldn't find anything to say. His silence disturbed her and he was able to hear her worried thoughts. She blamed herself for telling him.
... I've said too much ... he's not ready for that ... he doesn't feel the same way ... you're stupid Rey ... that's not the way to do it, but I've never said that to anyone ... it's because you're stupid, nobody loves you, nobody ever has ... you have no experience, he's not interested in you ...
Ben realized with horror that she had misinterpreted his silence and decided to make her understand that she had been wrong. He took her hands, making them disappear under the huge handles that were his.
"Rey ..."
He hesitated over his words, and once again she misjudged his silence. She disengaged herself from his arms and turned her back to him.
"It's okay Ben. Don't feel obligated to do anything. I didn't say this to ... I just wanted you to know that you are a good man, no matter what you think, and that it is very easy to love you. I understand very well that... I mean you don't have to share these feelings, don't worry about it."
"Rey, let me ..."
"For how can you love me?"
Her voice took on an anguished tone that broke his heart. How could she doubt what he was feeling? Ben had never seen her so desperate.
"I am a descendant of the most horrible man in the Galaxy. I am filled with darkness and I don't know how to escape it! A monster ... I hurt you so many times, I even killed you ... Oh Ben try to forget what I said, what we have is wonderful, I didn't want to ruin it ..."
Ben came to his senses and silenced her with the help of the Force. Her lips blocked, she widened her eyes at him, shocked that he could have done this. But he couldn't let her think that any longer.
"You're kidding, aren't you? Have you forgotten who I am? Rey..."
He had gotten up in his turn and taken her in his arms.
"I loved you when we thought you didn't have a name, I loved you when I found out you were a Palpatine, I love you now, and nothing will ever change my mind!"
"Rey I love you, do you hear me? I don't know if his words are enough to describe what I feel, but they are the only ones that come to mind. I love you so much. You are... you are everything to me, I love you," he repeated.
He released the hold on her face and her mouth opened in an almost comical expression of surprise.
"Really?" she whispered.
"How could you doubt it for a second? I agreed to be chained and imprisoned for months just to be by your side! Talk about a fool."
She burst out with a small laugh that got lost in a sob. Then she threw herself around his neck and put her forehead against his.
You really love me?
He kissed her in response. Again and again, he kissed all over her face, on the tip of her nose, her lips, her tears, her cheeks, her neck.
"Ben..."
He lifted her up as if she weighed nothing and Rey placed her legs around his waist to get closer to him. A jolt almost knocked them to the ground, and they burst out laughing as they felt the ship begin its descent towards their new planet, their new home.
/
/
General's Office, Ohma D'un.
After his confrontation with Ben, Finn couldn't bring himself to go back to bed and he started wandering around the city until the sun came up. His feet had finally carried him to Poe's office, mentally preparing to announce the news of their friend and Ben's departure to the General. He had barely pushed the door open when he received a sharp blow. It was Poe holding him close, looking very worried.
"Finn! Finn, buddy! I thought something had happened to you!"
"What?"
"You haven't heard? Rey and Ben... they escaped... they stole a ship and left... I've got half the Resistance scolding for us to hand them over and now they've escaped and then... Finn? You all right?"
"Yeah, I'm fine."
"You don't look surprised..."
He lowered his eyes and nodded his head.
"I ran into Ben before they left."
"You let him?!"
"What did you want me to do? I'm no match for him!"
"Sound the alarm? Or call the guard? Finn, how could you do this?"
"They wanted to leave, Poe, and how can I blame them? Half of the Resistance already didn't like them, they're all going to want to hand them over now, what will you do then? Will you be ready to hand Rey over to the New Order?"
"You know I'd never do anything to Rey! But now that she's run away... She'll look like a criminal..."
"Finn is right," said Connix. "Keeping them here would only have endangered the Resistance."
"The New Order would hunt them down, not to mention the UGS, but what were they thinking? What are we going to do?"
"They are well hidden, I doubt the New Order will find them if they don't want to."
"How can you be sure?"
"Well ... I'm the one who helped Ben leave and find a hiding place ..."
"WHAT?! Without consulting me beforehand? You forget I'm your General, Kaydel!"
"I won't apologize for helping Rey! The message from that Engell destroyed her, Ben asked me to help them leave the Resistance and that's what I did, that's what Leia would have done!"
"And what are we going to tell the UGS when they ask us to give them our only guarantee of peace against the New Order? We have betrayed them!"
"Poe! So you were going to hand over Rey!"
"Of course not, but I wouldn't have hesitated for Solo. Now that they've run away what are we going to do?"
"We're going to fight! We have to convince them that the New Order is lying, that the surrender of Ben and Rey would in no way have prevented the war that lies ahead! They must fight with us!"
"Wake up Finn, we have not put together systems to fight but for peace, you saw the charter. They are not warriors. We are alone again."
"We have signed treaties, they are not going to get away with this! They won't let us do the dirty work alone! They broke free of the First Order once, they'll do it again!"
"So Ben and Rey... where are they?" Finn asked shyly after a while.
"They were within sight of the planet Sorgan," Connix answered.
"May they stay there!"
"Poe!"
/
/
Sorgan, Outer Rim.
While he was landing the ship, Ben told her about the vegetation, pine forests and trees whose resinous smell would embalm the surroundings. He mentioned lakes and swamps, small ponds where colourful shrimp would abound. He was enthusiastic about the green expanses and the long walks they could take.
Rey did not listen to any of this. She was just focused on him. She hadn't left the shelter of his arms for a single second. Not even when he offered to show her around their new refuge, an abandoned hangar once used by smugglers. Nestled in a valley in the heart of a forest of young trees, Rey perceived the distinctive lapping of a river nearby. But she didn't care.
He carried her in his arms, and at the same time sent her the memory of a similar situation, on Takodana, a century earlier it seemed. She swept away his apology for what he had done, times had changed.
The disused hangar was cold and dusty, but showed no sign of life since long. They would be safe here. They stopped in the first room they found, without even looking around, there would be plenty of time for that later.
Ben gently laid her down on the bed and Rey immediately drew him towards her.
"I love you," he said.
She made a sound like a purr as she felt her heart burning. The sadness and all the horrors that had overwhelmed her in the last few days were now far away. Oh they would reappear one day or another. Rey knew that she wasn't free of her torments, but in the arms of the man she loved, who also loved her to her great surprise, she swept away her fears and gave herself over to the happiness of their embrace.
Their kisses soon took on a frenzied rhythm. Rey wasted no time and almost tore Ben's jumper off. He laughed at her eagerness as he did the same and took off the first tunic she wore, then he gently undid the clothes she still wrapped around her arms and kissed every bit of her skin as he stripped it off. He was about to plunge back towards her lips when he froze, feeling that she wanted to talk to him.
"Ben ... you know I never ..."
He knew that of course. Was there anything else he didn't know about her? Was there a part of her that he didn't already knew? But it was as if she needed to say it out loud, to materialize this thought so as not to let it float in their minds as if she was ashamed of it. Ben didn't ask her if she wanted to stop, she didn't want to and he knew it.
But he also knew that she was afraid, that she was worried that she was inexperienced, or that she might make a wrong move. He wasn't very confident at the time either, she could feel him shaking against her. This time nothing would stop them, there was no emergency, no friend to rescue, no enemy running around and threatening. There was only them.
So he tried to reassure her. He kissed her gently, first on her forehead, then on her cheeks, he went down into her neck, his lips barely touching her, leaving her gasping and hungry for more. The exquisite torture of his mouth burned her every time it brushed her skin. As he moved down to her chest she had a nervous movement towards him, an uncontrollable reaction as she looked forward to him going on.
Without taking his eyes off her, he went through her body with his hands, tickling her chest slightly with his fingertips before slipping towards her bare belly. She shivered when he ran his fingers along the taut muscles of her abdomen and ribs.
She was already on fire. Ben's powerful legs encircled hers, and sometimes he squeezed them tighter, sending shocks of pleasure where her thighs touched. The fear she may have felt was gone by now, she noticed.
When this thought materialized Ben plunged towards her and removed the cloth that held her chest tight, Rey muffled a cry of surprise and pleasure as he began to kiss her breasts. She threw her head back and grabbed the fabric of Ben's trousers, squeezing and scratching it. She couldn't hear herself moan any more, but maybe it was for the best.
He kissed, nibbled and licked with adoration and almost reverence, the slightest bit of skin he had discovered.
Rey suddenly opened an eye, and seeing him like that, worshipping her body, hair in a mess and eyes closed, concentrated on his task, sent her new waves of pleasure, less dazzling but more diffuse, stronger. She had an involuntary movement of her hips when he bit a little harder and immediately Ben came up towards her face, capturing her lips. They began to move in a single motion, their bodies responding with delight to the friction they were making.
It is so good, Rey thought.
"Yes..." Ben whispered against her lips.
She grabbed his hair with her hands as Ben's came down. One stopped halfway down and the other slipped between her legs. This time her moan was so loud that Rey felt herself blush. But soon Ben began to move and she forgot her embarrassment. She came to meet his hand, to receive more, always more.
Rey was, and always will be, an eternal starving soul. For food, water, contact, love, anything she might have missed. A life of deprivation wasn't curable, but perhaps what he was doing to her at the moment could make up for it. He took off her slacks as quickly as he took off her top and soon she was completely naked in front of him. She didn't have time to feel embarrassed because he was already covering her with his massive body. She grabbed his powerful shoulders, clutching him, moving in a lascivious and terribly good rhythm. He leaned on his forearms, his hands moving delicately through her hair.
Rey took the opportunity to slide hers over him in turn. Caressing his chest, she kissed his chin, biting into the soft skin that covered his strong jaw. She came down from his neck and then his arms, brushing and clawing his muscles. Ben was tensing, and the thought that she might be responsible for this, excited her perhaps even more than his hands on her.
Rey was too small to be able to take his trousers off the way he had done, but she didn't like the fact that he still had them on and she let him know with an annoyed thought. He laughed against her forehead, kissing her gently, then pushing lightly on his arms he straightened up and crouched on his knees, Rey's legs still tightly packed between his own.
With the help of his grip she also got up and stopped Ben from undoing the thin cord holding his trousers. He understood at once, and she was pleased to see him blush again. She wasn't quite sure herself, but she was terribly eager to do this, to return the favor for his gesture when he had undressed her a few minutes earlier. To discover him completely.
She untangled his legs and pushed him onto the bed so that he could lie on his back. She soon climbed up on his body and was delighted with a newfound self-confidence. As she sensed his confused and sensual thoughts towards her, she slowly undid the tie and the fabric loosened on his hips. He lifted himself up a little to help her slide the cloth off his long legs and a few breaths later he was as naked as she was.
He's so beautiful, Rey thought. She leaned towards him, pressing her chest against his torso as their hair and mouth mingled again. Ben clutched her in his arms, and she did the same, looking for more and more contact. He tilted them to find himself above her, and Rey stared at the place where their bodies were touching.
Eyes rolling and her head falling back as he began to move against her, Ben showed again a satisfied smile and bent down to whisper in her ear, momentarily stopping his movements.
"Sorry, is that too much?"
His smile disappeared as she let out a grunt of desire and rage and turned her head to capture his lips, almost biting him.
"Not enough," she sighed against him.
She clenched her fists and her jaw while he started to move again and again.
Once more his hand got between her legs and she lost consciousness for a few moments. He was making her discover sensations she never would have imagined. Waves of pleasure and tension rippled through her body, making her shake. The bond kept snapping in their minds, their thoughts shifting from one to the other, not knowing where their own stopped, but after all they had always been one.
Ben seemed to know exactly what she liked when she herself had no idea a few minutes earlier. Using her body's reactions, but also her thoughts, she quickly felt something rise inside her.
Rey tried to relax, but in vain. She became more and more tense. A heat, then a nervous discharge, as if her body had started producing lightning again, and for a brief moment Rey opened her eyes to check that she wasn't completely losing control of her body, but that was exactly what was happening.
Ben reassured her by kissing her, and she finally let herself go, welcoming the sensations with delight.
Suddenly his hand went further and she felt it where no one had ever gone before. Without her understanding how, the sensations exploded inside her, and Rey contracted violently against him, while a moan closer to a groan escaped from between her lips. Ben joined her cries, feeling her pleasure through the bond. The Force within them burst like a huge blaze.
Little by little the shivers decreased and Rey found herself trembling in his arms, her eyes half closed, trying to understand what had just happened to her.
"Ben ... it was ..."
She couldn't find a word and he didn't help her as he rubbed his nose against her cheek, with that satisfied smile of his on his face. She didn't even get annoyed, what she had just experienced had been amazing, he had been amazing.
She could never have imagined something so intense. But as she took a breath, she realized that her heart wasn't calming down. A new hunger was burning inside her. A hunger that she was eager to satisfy. She turned her face to kiss him, and Ben responded enthusiastically. As she began to move her hips against his, he took a deep breath and stopped her. Confused, she questioned him in the bond. Had she done something wrong?
"We don't ... I mean, we don't have to do anything."
"What are you talking about," she asked.
"We can take our time, we have all the time in the world, Rey."
"But I don't want to wait!"
She picked up where he stopped her. Clinging to his arms, Rey pressed him against the bed and climbed on top of him. She caressed his chest, then his belly, rejoicing to see him tense and moaning. She had never felt as powerful, as womanly as she did at that moment. But soon Ben grabbed her by the hips and pressed her harder against him. Then he turned her over, placed himself on top of her and Rey spread her legs to let him come closer. His huge hands were touching her all over, and she began to feel hot and shaky again. It felt so good. The sweetest torture of all.
Rey ... are you sure? Asked Ben in the bond.
She had never been so sure in her life. Her answer, her lips on his, was all Ben needed. He moved closer to her, and deepened the kiss as his hand went down to where their bodies touched. Rey didn't know what to expect, she only knew that desire was consuming her, that she would die of frustration if he didn't hurry.
She felt his fingers before she felt something else, something harder, softer. Ben entered her slowly, giving time for her body to adapt to him. There was pain, a pinch, a burn, but nothing insurmountable, nothing compared to the pleasure that came over her when he touched her again with his fingers.
At last he withdrew and slowly started again, going further and further each time. She could see him closing his eyes more, his arms trembling to keep himself above her and not crushing her, but she could see that he was holding back.
Ben ... it feels so good ...
Her encouragement made him speed up a little and she suddenly tensed at the ache. But immediately he slowed down, caressing her again, kissing her neck, so Rey forgot everything. He continued his lascivious movements, one hand touching her face, her lips, while he kissed her and asked her if everything was all right, the other always on the most sensitive part of her body.
He was moving faster now. Rey was no longer in pain, there was only pleasure. She didn't know which one was his or hers. She clutched his neck, scratching, biting, but Ben didn't seem to mind.
He raised his hands and leaned against the bed frame, moving inside her faster and harder. She felt as if she was losing herself completely. The Force was pulsating so strongly inside them that she didn't know how to hold it back.
Let go, he told her. Let go my love.
And so she did. Through her closed eyelids she could see blue lights flashing as she surrendered to pleasure.
She felt her lightning flashes escape from her fingers without her being able to stop them, while she trembled and screamed even louder than before. Ben screamed too. But there was no pain in the bond. As his hands contracted more and more, they let go of the bed and grabbed her hair, closing tightly on her locks. Not wanting to miss the moment when he, too, would let go, she opened her eyes and saw his, half open, lost in what he was feeling. His jaw tightened, his breathing noisy, she had never seen him as beautiful as in that moment.
So she froze it forever in her memory, just before Ben lost himself in the throes of deliverance and stopped moving in a last gasp. He trembled several times before collapsing on top of her.
Rey caressed his face, removing locks of hair from his forehead. Ben leaned on his elbows and kissed her lightly as if he was afraid of hurting her.
"Rey ..." he whispered. "Kriff ... I ... Are you all right?"
"I love you," was her only answer.
She shared with him all the sensations she felt in the bond, and sighing with relief, he fell to his side so as not to crush her any longer. She immediately huddled up against him. She was pleased to see that she hadn't hurt him either, although there were burn marks all around them that showed she had lost control.
"It was..." said Ben, putting an end to her guilt.
"Yes..."
She lost track of how long they stayed like this, enjoying what they had just shared. Her heart hadn't slowed for a second, but she had never felt better, more soothed. The hunger had also subsided. For now.
Caressing Ben's still tense muscles, she raised her head and crossed his dark gaze. The hunger returned immediately. But now she knew how to quench it.
"Again," she ordered, throwing herself on him.
And Ben complied without hesitation.