1994 – Third Year
Hermione wandered through the castle, absent minded of her surroundings, completely lost in her thoughts - her daydreams. She walked with a grin plastered upon her face, oblivious to how goofy she probably looked to anyone who saw her.
She wasn't even sure why she felt so happy, nothing in particular had happened to make is so, but is was the prospect of something that could happen that filled her stomach with butterflies.
As she climbed off the last flight of stairs and made her way down the long winding corridor ahead of her, she though back to her last conversation with Draco, almost 2 nights ago.
"Are Theo and Daphne a thing then?" Hermione asked Draco as he played with a strand of her hair.
They sat together in their usual spot, at their favourite place, watching the sun set over Hogwarts out of the window to their room. Hermione lay curled up beside Draco, her head rested on his chest, moving with each calming breath he took.
"I'm not sure, I haven't really asked." Draco responded with a clear lack of interesting in the conversation.
"He's your friend, is he not?"
"Yes I suppose he is – but like I've said before, my friends are different to yours. We don't really talk about our feelings."
"Hmm… I just think it's a bit odd. They're sneaking around the castle together, clearly hiding what they have, you're his friend and you haven't once thought to ask."
"Nope."
"Strange."
"You seem very invested in their relationship, why don't you ask them?"
"Yes, because that would go down swimmingly. 'Hey guys, I know you hate me and my kind, but I just wandered, are you guys in a relationship of just hooking up?' I can imagine it now." She mocked.
"Good point… besides, Theo might think your jealous."
"Of what!? Him?" Hermione sat up on her seat, turning to stare at him in disbelief.
Draco shuffled slightly, displeased by her movement away from, instantly feeling a chill once her body disconnected from his.
"Perhaps." He answered, with a smirk forming before he continued, "Or simply that you don't have someone to run around, hiding behind closed doors with."
"Well that's simply not true is it." She responded, with an overconfident wink.
"Yes but its not the same is it. My point was that you're not off hiding in supply cupboards locking lips with someone."
"True." Hermione said with a faint blush approaching her cheeks. The more time she had spent with Draco, the more hours she had put into learning how to hid her emotions, the better she had gotten in preventing her cheeks from turning a familiar shade of crimson around anyone. The ironic this was that it had become easier with everyone else, aside from Draco himself.
"I'm different though." She added before she moved to the other side of the window seat to sit opposite him.
"How so?"
"I wouldn't just do that, not with anyone at least. They may have feelings for each other but something tells me that its just hormones that are fuelling their desire, not any real interest. Why else would they want to hide it, I highly doubt either of their families would disapprove, their friends wouldn't care, clearly, so why else hide it unless they didn't really see it going anywhere, its all just for fun."
"So then why are you different? Wouldn't you want to have a little fun?"
"Its not that I'm opposed to having fun, its that… Well…" No amount of practice could stop Hermione from blushing furiously as she tried to get her words out, thoroughly embarrassed by what she was trying to admit.
"I wouldn't want my first kiss to be just for fun. I wouldn't want my first experience of relationship to be some way to pass time."
She turned her gaze away from Draco as she spoke, unable to maintain eye contact, she instead looked out of the window towards the Dark Forest. Silence broke out between the two of them, making Hermione feel more embarrassed by the second that she had admitted she had never been kissed.
Not before long, she had regretted opening her mouth entirely, when eventually Draco cleared his throat and finally responded.
"You shouldn't be ashamed to never have kissed someone, Hermione."
"I'm not ashamed." She answered quickly, still keeping her face angled away from him, her brows furrowed.
"Well embarrassed then, clearly your something otherwise you would look at me and your face wouldn't be the colour of your Gryffindor badge."
Hermione sighed and turned to face him, her face slightly more relaxed, she expected him to have a smirk or an expression of humour on his face, to be mocking her slightly, but instead she found his face more serious with understanding.
"I'm not ashamed." She said more calmly this time, "but yes, I am embarrassed to be talking about it. You've got a bit of a reputation for yourself and its difficult to admit to someone like that, well, I haven't."
"A reputation you say, with the ladies?" He teased, raising his eyebrows suggestively and winking at her.
Hermione scowled with a huff, folding her arms across her chest before she turned to look outside once more.
"Hermione, tell me, this reputation of mine, does it include girls from this school?"
Hermione nodded in response but said nothing, keeping her eyes fixated on the view outside.
"Supply cupboards, wandering off at parties, breaking hearts? All that stuff?"
She nodded once more, growing more and more fed up with the direction of the conversation.
"So, what I want to know, is how I have time to be second to you in all my classes, aside from potions of course. Play as Seeker on the Slytherin Quidditch team, maintain some sort of friendship with the few Slytherins I can tolerate, then spend all of my free time with you, nearly every night, and still manage to break all these girls hearts and find myself in supply cupboards."
Hermione's shoulders relaxed, she bowed her head and turned to face him. Keeping her head low she looked up through her lashes towards him. She hadn't realised that he had sat forward slightly, resting his hands on the bottom her legs, the corner of his mouth curled up into a small smile.
"They're just rumours Hermione. Pureblood girls can be so fickle when rejected, they'll say anything to make it seem as though they haven't actually been rejected. It may shock you to know this, but I've never kissed anyone either. It also may make me sound soft for saying this but – I always wanted my first kiss to be with someone I liked, someone I had feelings for. For all their faults, my mother and father are incurable romantics and they would die for each other. It's difficult to live in a house with them and not dream of the day I'll be able to find someone to be that passionate about. To be completely compatible with and never grow tired of their company, to be so in sync it scares me. I will just make better decisions than them where my children are concerned." He finished, his eyebrows scrunched together as he started to lose himself in thoughts of his fathers choices for his future.
"You're right, it does shock me. But its also sweet that you feel that way." She said, her voicing bringing him back to the present.
"Not all boys are animals y'know." He chuckled, sitting back once more whilst his hands remained above her ankles.
"So… who are these girls I've been running off in supply cupboards with?" He begun his teasing once more.
The cool air circulating around the courtyard crashed into Hermione, momentarily throwing her off her balance and drawing her out of her daydream. She felt the tip of her nose grow cold as the wind continued to scratch at her face, turning on her heals she decided against continuing her stroll outside.
Her mind wandered back to Draco's admission to having never been kissed, it warmed her heart to know he felt so strongly about it, he felt the same way as she did and wanted it to be with someone he cared about, she could only hope to be that someone.
As she turned the corner, Hermione heard the family whine of Pansy Parkinson. She rolled her eyes and slowed her pace, not wanting to make her presence known as she wasn't quite ready for her mood to be ruined entirely.
"I feel like I never see you anymore, you're always in one of your late night potions classes or going for walks where you insist on being by yourself." Pansy complained, the high tones of her voice cutting through Hermione's eardrums causing her to shiver.
Hermione felt sorry for whomever was on the receiving end of Pansy's whining, just as she was about to turn the corner, unable to slow down anymore without coming to a stop, she froze entirely as she heard the person in question respond to Pansy.
"Pansy dear, stop complaining. I'm in the common room as much as everybody else and I take pride in my extra curricular's. Sometimes I like to go for a walk and clear my head, that shouldn't be a crime."
"But I miss you." Hermione could hear the pout in Pansy's voice and picture her pug face clearly in her head.
She turned the corner ever so slightly, daring to get a better look at the pair. Pansy stood with her back to Hermione, her hands clasped behind her as she rocked backwards and forwards on her heal. Draco leaned against the wall opposite her, his arms folded across his chest with his right foot raised and resting against the wall.
Hermione could see Draco clearly, his emotionless face giving nothing away as always. It didn't make her feel any less uncomfortable when Pansy's feelings were so evident even without being able to see her face, his face however, neither confirmed the same feelings nor denied them.
Time stood still for Hermione, her legs became weak and her stomach turned upside down whilst the rest of her body rapidly turned cold as she watched Pansy rock forward one last time and stand on her tip toes, beginning to close the gap between her and Draco.
She watched from a distance through her now misty eyes, her vision blurring by the second, whilst Pansy leaned forward to close the last inch between them with a kiss.
Unable to control herself, Hermione gasped, causing Draco's eyes to shoot to the end of the corridor where she stood. Hermione wasn't sure if the kiss had lasted for a second, a minute or longer, she had no interest in finding out and instead turned quickly, her feet moving rapidly without any acknowledging command form her brain, she ran and didn't look back to see if he had followed.
Finally she slowed as she reached the courtyard, unsure where to go from there, when a familiar warm voice called out for her. Harry ran across the courtyard, Ron beside him, with a smile across his face.
If someone had asked her to, Hermione couldn't have describe the feeling of relief she felt seeing Harry and Ron, despite her situation with Ron, their timing of arrival was impeccable.
"Where've you been? You're looking pretty flushed." Harry commented.
Before she had chance to reply, an owl swooped low enough to alert the trio of the letter it held between its beak. Ron turned to them both, his face perplexed as he walked towards the owl that had now landed on a close by bench. After he had retrieved the letter addressed to the three of them, he pulled it out of the envelope, reading it as he walked back to his friends.
His face paled and grew serious and Hermione felt her stomach flip for a second time that evening. Once Ron had finished reading, he looked up towards Harry with concern before he turned to Hermione, only making her feel worse. Harry snatched the letter from his hand and began to read, his face growing growing more concerned the further down the letter he got.
"Buckbeak's been sentenced to death." Harry told Hermione.
She suddenly found herself overwhelmed with emotion, both for herself and for Hagrid. Her knees began to weaken beneath her once more only this time she felt an arm wrap around her and support her, expecting to look up to Harry, she was surprised to be staring into Ron's blue eyes.
"I'm so sorry about Scabbers." Hermione said through her shakey voice.
"I should be the one apologising, I'm sorry about the past few months Mione." He bowed his head in shame before Hermione rested her head on his shoulder, letting the tears stream from her eyes.
"We'll go and see Hargid soon." Harry told her, his hand caressed the top of her back in attempts to comfort her slightly. He couldn't help but feel useless in a situation like this.
"And we will help with the appeal you're no doubt already planning to put together." Ron added, Hermione chocked out a small laugh as she sniffled against his shoulder.
Everything felt normal between them again, her problem with Draco temporarily pushed to the back of her mind as she enjoyed Harry and Ron's company together for the first time in a long time.
~X~
The sun shone down on the Gryffindors and Slytherins who waited for their Care of Magical Creatures class to commence. Hermione sat on a rock situated behind Harry and Ron, with her Magical Creatures book resting open in her lap.
She caught sight of Draco joining the class with Crabbe and Goyle by his side. Keeping her head down to avoid eye contact, she remained buried in her book. She hadn't spoken to or seen Draco since the night she saw him kiss Pansy. She felt her necklace burn ferociously the first night and every night since. It had been a week and she hadn't given in and gone to see him, she wans't ready to talk to him just yet, she wasn't ready to explain why seeing him kiss Pansy would upset her so much.
"Good evenin' class." Hargid's voice boomed, thick with grief.
Hermione's heart ached as she looked at Hagrid, his were swollen with purple rings beneath them. She hated to see anyone she cared about hurt, more so when there was nothing she could do to fix it.
"Before we start our class, I have somethin to say. I'm sure you all remember Buckbeak." Hagrid's voice broke as he mentioned his Hippogriffs name.
"Well, after what happened…" Hagrid struggled some more as his eyes flickered across to Draco, fighting to finish his sentence and share the news with the class.
"They made a decision on Buckbeak and, well its not great." Thick pools of tears began to build in Hagrid's eyes, he stroked the length of his beard as he bit on his lip to fight back the tears from falling.
Hermione sat upon the rock, fighting back her own tears that had begun to build when she heard sniggering from beside her. Her head snapped to the direction of where the noise came from and she caught sight of the back of Draco's head who was facing Blaise and Goyle who were both finding Hagrid's grief very ammusing.
Rage sparked inside of Hermione as she watched this heartless act. Before she realised what she was doing, she had jumped off the rock and stormed across to the Slytherins. All of the emotions she had held inside for over a week in relation to Draco, along with the stress her school work was causing her combined with the pain she was feeling over Hagrid made for a dangerous cocktail inside of her.
She felt herself bubbling as she stopped just behind Draco, her magic rippled inside of her and she could feel the sparks coursing through her body.
"What d'you want Mudblood?" Pansy asked, from a safe distance away from Hermione.
The whole class grew quiet, Blaise nodded his head towards Hermione and Draco turned to see what the fuss was about when his eyes landed on her.
He hadn't been this close to her in over a week, all he wanted to do was reach out and grab her, he wanted to hold her in his arms and explain what happened with Pansy, to apologise to her. He almost forgot where they were for a moment, he found it all too easy to get lost in her eyes, which he noted now upon closer inspection, were filled with tears.
Hermione's fists where clenched beside her, her fingers began to tingle as she stared up at Draco, the spark inside of her flickered and soon escalated through her body. Her fist reacted on impulse as she rose her hand and pulled back her arm. When she released her hand, she immediately felt a burning sensation in her knuckles as her fist connected with his nose.
Draco stumbled backwards, steadying himself on Blaise as his face resembled that of the other Slytherins, pure shock. He looked through water that had instantly appeared in his eyes upon impact, and stared at Hermione. She stood frozen, panting heavily, her eyebrows scrunched on her forehead whilst her eyes remained locked on the streams of red coursing down his face.
Hermione felt her whole hand become warm, she was sure some of Draco's blood had made it onto her hand as she felt something wet fall off one of her knuckles onto the floor.
Ron rushed to Hermione's side and grabbed her arm, shaking her slightly to until her focus detached from Draco. She turned on her heal and walked away from the Slytherins, but she didn't stop. Instead she continued to walk past the rest of the students and away from Hagrid's hut where the lesson was taking place.
Harry grabbed her school bag and followed a short distance behind her with Ron, neither one wanting to get to close to her just yet.
~X~
"Where's Hermione?" Shamus whispered across the classroom to Harry.
Harry looked beside himself towards Ron who shrugged, neither of the two had seen her since Care of Magical Creatures lesson.
"Well, when you see her, congratulate her on that right hook of hers will ya, that was a belter." Shamus added with a laugh.
"Do you think she's still in the common room?" Ron asked Harry as he lowered his voice.
"Most probably. We will go check on her after this lesson."
"It's not like Hermione to miss a class."
Harry nodded in agreement, his face riddled with concern.
The pair walked with haste back to the Gryffindor common room in search of Hermione. As they stumbled through the portrait they both relaxed as they found her, sound asleep curled up by the fire on one of the arm chairs.
"Hermione." Ron said gently as he knelt down beside her, nudging her slightly to stir her from her dreams.
Hermione's eyes crinkled with protest as she groaned, she wasn't quite ready to wake up just yet.
"You've missed Charms class Mione." Harry spoke next, with an equally gentle tone as Ron, they were still a little anxious around her as there will still some unanswered questions regarding her outburst.
At this news, her eyes shot open and she sat up properly, her eyes wide as she looked around the room before she found the time.
"I didn't mean to fall asleep, I'm just exhausted."
"You need to take a break Hermione, you're doing too much. You're taking way more lessons than the average person, maybe even more than the other over achievers. You're always out late studying, you need to rest." Harry said, Ron nodded with agreement whilst he remained knelt beside her.
Hermione sighed and nodded, a small part of her felt guilty that they thought her exhaustion was entirely to do with studying, when she knew some of it was to do with a boy they despised, a boy she had just punched.
The reminder of such an event caused her to wince as she look down at her now swollen hand, her knuckles were red raw and tender to touch.
"I must say, that was bloody brilliant Hermione." Ron chuckled, causing Hermione to laugh through her nose at him.
"What caused it though? I mean, don't get me wrong, I'll take any excuse to give Malfoy a crack, but that's me. What made you do it?" Harry asked.
Hermione looked up between the boys, trying to find her words, trying to understand what caused such a reaction, she didn't entirely know herself, all she remembered was an overwhelming surge of rage and her magic bubbling inside her. She looked back down at her hand before she answered.
"Like I said, I'm really tired and stressed and I heard them all laughing at Hagrid. He was just the closest on to me and I've always fantasised about doing it."
"That's as good a reason for me!" George announced as he walked into the common room.
"You're a feisty bunch aren't you." Fred added as he fired a wink towards Hermione.
The twins came over to where Harry was sat and parked themselves on the sofa beside him, George in particular was eager to hear all about what had happened in their Care of Magical Creatures lesson, although Hermione had had enough for one day.
She rose from her seat and headed over to the giant pitcher of water that sat on the table and picked up a goblet before she began pouring herself a glass.
"Are you ok?" Fred asked, picking up her hand after she had finished making herself a drink. He held the swollen hand in his and ran his finger over her knuckles gently. The feeling of his soft hands felt strange to Hermione, she wasn't used to anyone touching her this way, anyone other than Draco.
"I'm fine, it only hurts a little." She lied as she took back her hand, noting his deflated face as she did it.
"I'm going to go and freshen up, I'll see you later." She told him, speaking loud enough for the others to hear, although they were too deep in conversation, reliving the scene outside Hagrid hut all over again, George was thoroughly engrossed.
~X~
Hermione wandered through the almost deserted castle, still debating on whether or not to join the rest of the school in watching the final Quidditch match of the year; Slytherin vs Gryffindor. She wasn't feeling particularly up to pretending to enjoy Quidditch for the next hour or so, however she did want to support Harry.
After further consideration, she changed her route and began heading towards the Quidditch grounds. As she stepped outside, she felt herself walk into something solid, knocking her back slightly she noticed it was a someone not a something.
Her eyes moved up the green garments the person wore, trailing up the familiar build until finally landing on his face.
"There you are!" Draco spoke with desperation in his voice.
Without giving her time to react, or potentially hit him again, he grabbed her for-arm and pulled her back into the castle. Hermione's eyes darted down each corridor they passed, checking nobody could see them until eventually she found herself being dragged into one of the rooms close by.
Once in the room Draco closed the door behind them and turned to Hermione with a determined look on his face, still panting from his search throughout the castle for her.
Hermione looked up at him, admiring the way his eyes glistened in his Quidditch uniform, the silver stitching reflected against the outer rim of his iris, it was very easy to forget that she was angry with him when he looked like this. The outline of the bruise that lay softly over his nose, just beneath his eyes kindly reminded her that she was in fact still angry with him. She shook her head a little, remembering once more why she hadn't spoken to him and turned away from him, facing down towards her feet.
"I've been looking everywhere for you, I can't concentrate enough to even mount my broom, let alone play the biggest game of the season."
Hermione said nothing in response, she continued to keep her head low, facing away from him.
"Hermione, I didn't want that to happen, you've got to believe me."
"It's not up to me who you do and don't kiss, if you want to kiss her by all means, go and find yourself a supply cupboard and do it some more." Hermione said, her voice breaking the further into the sentence she got.
She reached for the handle of the door but was stopped by Draco as he put his hand on top of hers.
"If I wanted to kiss her, I wouldn't be in a supply cupboard with you now would I?"
Hermione's eyes shot up to his before she examined her surroundings. She hadn't taken note of their close proximity, she'd grown so used to it by now that it seemed more abnormal to find herself around him with distance between them. But now she realised the reason for it was due to the lack of room they had. He was right, they were in a supply cupboard, not just any though – they were in Snapes.
"Pansy has always made her intentions clear, she's always spoken about some misguided betrothal she thinks our families have agreed upon since our birth and has ever shied away from showing how much she wish that were true. There's a part of me that thinks she genuinely believes it."
Hermione's stomach turned as she listened to him speak, she didn't want to hear about the possibility that Draco may one day be married to Pansy.
"Pure blood males have some weird duty to be nothing less than gentlemanly to the opposite sex of their own kind. I have always made it clear that I am not interested in her, maybe not clear enough it seems and a part of that will be because I try to maintain those characteristics around her, I don't know - All I know is I definitely don't want that."
Draco closed his eyes and inhaled deeply in attempts to steady his breathing, once he caught his breath he opened his eyes again and took a step closer to Hermione.
"We once had a conversation about first kisses. If I remember rightly, your face resembled that of a cherry when we had it."
"I remember. Its what I was thinking about before I found you with Pansy."
He winced at her words, if there was anything he wished he could change in time, giving Pansy the opportunity to kiss him would be exactly that.
"Yes, well – If I remember rightly, it wasn't just you who confessed to having never been kissed. I too admitted to never having kissed anyone, and if you remember I told you it was because I always imagined my first kiss to be someone I liked, someone I cared about a lot. I never wanted my first kiss to be because of a dare or because someone misread my body language and thought that's what I wanted. I wanted the person I kissed to mean something to me."
"Is that what Pansy is to you?" Hermione asked, looking down at her hands as she fiddled with her fingers, unsure as to whether not she wanted to know the answer. She acknowledged that he said he handn't wanted it to happen, but a small part of her wandered if now it had, maybe his feelings had changed.
"Hermione, her lips never touched mine."
She let the words sink in for a moment as a huge wave of relief washed over her. Still unable to look up to him, she couldn't stop the corners of her mouth for curling up into a small smile.
"She's nothing more than an acquaintance out of necessity due to family ties. She's not even close to who I imagined my first kiss to be with."
Draco signed heavily, his nerves beginning to get the better of him as he was starting to lose his courage. He reached forward and placed a finger beneath her chin, lifting her face up slightly, forcing her to look at him directly before he spoke again.
"I'd never pictured it. I'd never thought too much into it. I just figured it would happen when I meet the right person. And then I met you, and since then I've pictured it over a thousand times."
He moved his hand from beneath her chin, stoking up her jaw line and along the top of her cheek, his fingers continued into her hair until they stopped and rested at the nape of her neck, his thumb stroking along her cheek.
"The night beside the lake, the first time we came even close to kissing, before we saw that wolf. I could see the look of hurt in your eyes when you thought I rejected you, I didn't. Every night we have spent together since then I have tried to pluck up the courage to finish what you started, but I've chickened out every time. For a while I felt as though you changed your mind, until our conversation a few weeks ago."
"You're the person that I like Hermione. Despite everything we have going against us, you're the person that means a lot to me."
Draco closed his mouth, finally finished with all his words with nothing let to say, he reach his other hand out towards her waist. The butterflies in his stomach began dancing in a nauseating sequence along with the beating of his heart.
Hermione was overwhelmed with emotions his speech had caused, oozing with happiness she seized the moment and unclasped her hands from in front of her. She reached out both of her hand and placed them on his chest, causing Draco's hand to fall from her face which he placed it on the other side of her waist.
She slowly began to slide her hands up his chest to his shoulders until they eventually re-joined behind his neck. Looking up into his eyes she felt her body dissolve into his, loosing herself completely in his gaze.
She felt like everything around her had completely stopped, the silence around them was almost deafening leaving only the sound of her racing heart to echo inside her ears.
Draco's grip around her waist tightened as he pulled her body closer to his. The moment she felt his breath brush against her she closed her eyes, her mouth parted slightly as she inhaled the sweet scent of apple from his mouth before she felt his lips meet hers.
His lips felt smooth against hers as they pressed down softly at first, before the fire inside of her, built up on months of anticipation of this very moment, caused her to deepen the kiss. His insistent mouth caused her lips to part slightly, sending sparks throughout her body as she felt his breath mix with hers and she felt a rush of happiness.
Draco's body ignited as his grip around her waist tightened before he moved one of his hands towards the dip in her lower back, pulling her even closer to him. As her lips pressed harder against his, he felt as though never wanted to this moment to end and refused to pull away until they were both entirely breathless.
He rested his forehead against Hermione's, staring down at her still closed eyes as they both panted to regain their breath. The taste of Golden Syrup lingered on his lips as they tingled from the pressure of their kiss.
He watched as Hermione's mouth turned into a grin before she lowered herself back down to the balls of her feet, finally opening her eyes to look up at him and he moved his hand from her back to tuck a loose curl behind her ear. To Draco this moment was perfect, it had been everything and more than what he had imagined it to be and nothing could change that.
The sound of the supply cupboard door opening caused the pair to jump apart from each other as they were presented with a confused Professor Snape. Hermione's cheeks burned as she looked at Draco in hopes he could come up with an explanation as to what they were doing in there together much quicker than she could.
"Don't you have a Quidditch match to attend, Mr Malfoy?" Snape drawled, his eyes never meeting Hermione's.
"Y-yes sir." Draco stuttered in response, fleeing from the cupboard. Before he vanished completely from Hermione's site, he turned to give her once last wink before he ran off towards the Quidditch pitch.
"If you wish to spend all day in there Miss Granger, I can provide you with some cleaning supplies." Snape said, still not looking at her.
It was clear to her that he was equally as embarrassed as she was by the situation, and without another word from him, she walked quickly out of the cupboard muttering her apologies as she passed him, not looking back as she headed towards the Quidditch pitch. Her mind still spinning from her kiss with Draco.
Author Note:
So guys, there you have it! The moment so many of you have been waiting for. I sure hope it wasn't anticlimactic for anyone. I feel like I'd built this moment up so much that I found it incredibly difficult to actually write the scene, so I'm hoping I've lived up to everyone's expectations!