Thanks for those who are still with me! Enjoy! ;)- Draxca

Olivia had always loved the minutes around an early morning sunrise. They were still early enough on the highway that there weren't many other cars around to spoil the view of the pale reds and oranges starting to appear over the horizon. Olivia willed herself to relax and enjoy the view outside of the car. Then she casually turned her head to appreciate the views inside the car.

The drive to Ann Arbor wasn't a long one, which was a good thing, Olivia reflected. Sitting in the car, looking out as dawn crept over the horizon, she wasn't inclined to be talkative. It was early, and they hadn't had time for a coffee just yet - that was okay, she could wait. She had things she had to sort out in her head first.

The aftershocks of her nightmare had finally dissipated and now all she could think about was Renee and Dean having a baby. She wasn't sure which was more hurtful - Was it the fact that she was going to have to watch Renee get rounder and the two of them go through all the parenting "firsts" while Olivia relives her grief at the loss of Bean and knowing she'd likely never be able to have another? Or was it the fact that she felt horribly betrayed by her best friends - the only people she had left in this world that she could trust - who not only lied to her for a full two weeks (making her think she'd been exposed to a contagious virus, no less) weren't able to find a respectful way to give her the news and decided to leave it up to chance?

She closed her eyes, feeling the now-familiar rage bubble up - the betrayal hurt the worst, she thought. Renee and Dean had been the foundation on which she had begun to rebuild her life - now she felt adrift, the progress she had made towards being normal again gone. How could they do this to her? For Dean, of all people, to have gone along on this charade, and for what? To make things easier for Renee? What about Olivia? Who was going to watch out for her now? Who was on her side?

The sudden sharp pain in her hand made her wince - she'd dug her nails into her palms without even realizing it. Not enough to draw blood, but the red curves in the meat of her palm weren't going to go away quickly. The pain also made her realize that taking this trip with Seth, no matter how last minute, was the best thing she could have done. She needed time away from Dean and Renee to think, to let the bare emotions she was feeling heal a bit before deciding what she was going to do next. Olivia knew that at the heart of it all Renee and Dean were trying to make everyone happy - and that Renee herself was not guaranteed a happy ending in this situation either. She still had a few weeks to go before she was out of the woods, and Olivia would not wish the loss of a baby on anyone. Eventually Olivia would be able to speak to Renee, but it wasn't going to be now. She hoped Renee would realize that and give her some time and distance.

Olivia needed to get out of her current headspace - think about something else, anything else...but instead her thoughts turned back to Mark. He'd never been far from her thoughts, and lately the loss of him felt more like an occasional dull throbbing ache instead of a constant stabbing pain. She looked over at Seth, feeling oddly guilty when he looked back at her and smiled, asking her if she was waking up yet. Olivia could only nod mutely and turn her gaze back out to the views of the morning interstate traffic.

It had been a long time since she'd been on a road trip - and certainly had never been on one at this hour. Even while she and Mark had been together, after their camping honeymoon down the Oregon coast, they'd not been much for long drives - if they went out of state, it was flying. They'd simply been too busy - Mark with the Symphony, and she'd never be able to take long stretches of time off when she was teaching. She straightened up in her seat, and realized with a start that they'd never taken a proper holiday in the ten years they'd been together.

Seth saw her tense up out of the corner of his eye, "Everything okay over there?" He'd been glad to finally be on the road with Olivia, but he realized he needed to adjust his driving habits with someone else in the car.

Olivia looked over at him, "I'm good, Seth - I didn't mean to startle you. I just realized that I can't remember the last time I'd actually been on a road trip - I'd forgotten how nice it is to just sit and watch the traffic pass."

Seth chuckled, "I'm absolutely not going to take that as a criticism of my stunning lack of conversation this morning." He glanced over her way again, "It's been a long time since I had anyone to drive with me on these trips, sorry."

She reached over and patted his leg, "Not a worry - I'm still in wakeup mode myself - that first coffee is going to taste amazing…"

On impulse, Seth reached down and held onto her hand where it rested on his leg, relishing the warmth of it. Olivia felt his hand on hers and the smile was on her face before she could think twice. It felt so good. So normal. Why did she have to bring all of her baggage on this trip - couldn't she just leave the emotional stuff behind?

"Is this okay?" he asked quietly.

Olivia nodded. "Do you think you'll be doing this sort of thing on all of our road trips?" she asked teasingly.

Seth gave her a good side eye, "You can probably count on it."

She gave his leg a gentle squeeze, "Good."

The morning after Olivia stormed out was also a quiet one for Dean and Renee. Renee felt hungover - her eyes were still hot and glassy, her eyelids pink and swollen. It was hard to keep them open for any length of time, but she didn't want to stay in bed all day and needed to start thinking about how on earth she was going to make things right with Olivia. She rolled over and sat on the edge of the bed - it was awfully chilly in the house for June, and her slippers were not in sight. Renee heard Dean stir behind her and decided a shower could wait for just a few more minutes.

She curled up behind him, taking care not to rest her chilly fingers directly onto his skin, and gave him a hug. He roused and slowly stretched, pointing his toes and reaching over his head to the ceiling. When he brought his arms back down, he pulled Renee closer with one and locked her in against his chest with the other. Renee never got tired of the feeling of being in Dean's arms - since the first time he'd pulled her close to him, he'd always made her feel safe and loved. She definitely needed some of that this morning.

Dean kissed the top of her head, and when he tilted her face toward his, he kissed her delicately on the lips, "Good morning, beautiful. Get any sleep?"

She nodded, "Eventually yes - I think I remember pulling the blankets over my head at one point, but nothing after that...you?"

Dean chortled, "I did come to bed and see you buried in the blankets...how's the baby?" He had been so concerned about Renee last night that he'd given Dr. Flair an after-hours call. It was only when she'd assured him that Renee was not in any immediate danger that he let himself to go to bed. He'd spooned in behind her, feeling her heart beat from behind, strongly and steadily, and allowed it to lull him to sleep. Even after the chaos of last night, the deep sense of loss that had settled over them both after the front door latched shut was lessened just by being able to hold his wife in his arms. Renee had always been his anchor - in school she had been the stabilizing influence that allowed him to actually graduate on the honour roll and get into college. She would always come first for Dean.

Renee looked thoughtful, "Well baby is only the size of a plum, so I'm thinking it's pretty alright. Mama is also feeling not terrible this morning - the drugs are doing their thing, I'm thinkin'." She pushed herself up off of Dean's chest to look at the clock on his bedside table, "Good lord, is it only 5? Why is it so bright outside already?" Flopping back down beside her husband, Renee sighed deeply, "I miss her already, Dean...do you think it's too early to call?"

Dean propped himself up on his elbows, and quirked an eyebrow at his wife, "It's almost too early for a lot of things.." he rolled over and propped his head on his hand, "It is only 5...it's summer...Give her space and time, Ree...Liv needs this time - and so do we."

Renee sighed, "I'm worried about her, Dean. How could we have let her go off with Seth for two weeks? She barely knows him…"

Dean sat up, "Renee a week ago you couldn't wait for them to take a step together! This is Seth we're talking about, not some random stranger. He cares for her - and he's been very good for her these last two weeks. Olivia will call when she's ready, Renee...and Seth promised to keep in touch if she didn't."

Renee leaned against his chest, laying half in his lap, "I know, but that doesn't stop me from feeling like the worst kind of friend for driving her out of here, Dean. Who does that to their family?...I'll never forgive myself if something happens to her."

"She was going to have to live her own life eventually, Ree - weren't you just complaining about the fact that Olivia didn't have a life outside of the house?" Before Renee could argue, he went on, "We messed up - no matter how good our intentions were, we messed up with the one thing that was going to have major fallout if it went badly. Which it did. That's on us. The only thing we can do is apologize and tell Olivia how much we love her when she is ready to talk to us. That's it. We can either wait and wring our hands and moan or we can accept that for good or bad, Olivia is currently on her own. And we're here...with two weeks ahead of us. What are we going to do with all that time together?"

Renee looked up at her husband, why did he have to make so much sense? She felt a twinge of guilt over the sense of elation that started to grow when Dean mentioned being alone together for two weeks. It had been a very long time - they hadn't gone on holidays, not even a weekend away since Olivia had come to live with them the previous August. She shook her head, How can I be thinking this is a good thing? Olivia left here betrayed and broken by the only two people she had left in the world...we intentionally kept the pregnancy a secret from her...I intentionally kept the pregnancy from her because I was too scared to tell her to her face…

She wiped away a tear that threatened to fall, "Dean, we were the only people Olivia had in the whole world...I can't believe I thought it was a good idea to keep this from her." She buried her face into Dean's chest and let the tears come. Dean tightened his arms around her, and let a few of his own fall as well, he talked a good game - he was a therapist, he was trained to help other people see the side they didn't want to look at. But this morning he knew that Renee was also right - yes, they could only go forward, but that didn't stop the fact that they had made the wrong choice in waiting to reveal the pregnancy to Olivia. They should have found a way to make it work, to tell Olivia right away - that was the kicker really, not that Renee was pregnant, but that Olivia found out at the same time that the hundreds of thousands of Cincinnati-and-surrounding-area viewers did.

Dean did believe what he'd told Renee, Seth was a good guy. They'd been like brothers in high school - Seth definitely cared about Olivia and wanted her to be safe, and Dean knew Olivia was well able to take care of herself - but he did have a lingering concern that a relationship started by being the answer to a problem may not last when the problem was resolved. He didn't want to see either Seth or Olivia hurt. He felt Renee shift in his arms, and relaxed his embrace to look at her, "I love you, Renee."

Renee's tense expression melted, "Baby, I love you too." More tears sprang into the corners of her eyes, but were quickly wiped away by Dean.

Renee chuckled, "I swear I'm not crying because you love me…"

Dean kissed her gently on the lips, then helped her sit up, "I know…" He looked, really looked at his wife for a moment - her blonde hair looked like a halo with the summer morning sun shining through the window behind her, she still wore a shadow of makeup that she hadn't cried off last night, but she was still beautiful - he felt a tendril of warmth coil in his belly as he reached out to tuck a stray curl behind her ear, then letting his hand trail down her body, tracing her neck, then the curve of her breast, then rest on her thigh.

Renee shivered - her stomach had shown no signs of trouble yet this morning, so for the first time in two weeks when she felt Dean's touch she pushed away at her guilt, and reached a hand up to caress his rough shaven cheek. When she felt Dean lean into her caress, she grinned. "We can certainly give it the old college try," she whispered. Dean leaned down and kissed her and Renee was thrilled that she felt herself responding - had she been worried that her illness was going to change her relationship with Dean?

He broke their kiss, "I'm gonna jump in the shower - wanna join me? I hear sharing a shower is very eco-friendly…" Renee grinned at the image of Dean shuffling into the ensuite in only his pajama pants - he was still completely hunky, even after fifteen years. She loved the muscular planes of his shoulders, his tapered hips, and his arms...god she loved a man with good-looking arms...she felt her eyelids droop slightly, then spring open at the sound of her name. She looked up at Dean, now standing in the doorway with an expectant look on his face. "Sorry, babe - what did you say?"

Dean chuckled, "I said 'that's all I'll ever ask from you' and then waited for ten minutes while you sat there with a glazed expression on your face - you sure you're okay?

Renee thought of the definitely-okay turn her thoughts had just taken and nodded, "Oh I think so…" She got off the bed, walked past the slippers she had yearned for earlier and past Dean who still stood in the ensuite doorway. She trailed her fingers along his bare midriff and hip dip, making him jump slightly.

"Woah! Hey now, don't start something you can't finish darlin'" He grinned, happy and slightly relieved to see a bit of the Renee he knew making an appearance at last. Or maybe it was the pregnancy hormones. He watched Renee's bare legs step into the shower, and followed their line up until the shower curtain blocked her from view. Oh mama… Out of habit, he closed the pocket door of the ensuite and latched it behind him, making sure that whatever they wound up getting up to, they would be uninterrupted.

The road north to Ann Arbour was broken up with a breakfast stop in Lima - a little gourmet cafe on the corner of Market and South Elizabeth. It didn't look like much from the outside, but Seth assured Olivia as they parked in the lot behind that they not only had the best coffee brand in Ohio, they also had a great vegan menu. She stopped in the parking lot, "Vegan? Did you talk to Renee last night?"

Seth looked bewildered for a moment, "Olivia, no...I just knew that you guys ate mostly vegan...I thought you would appreciate not having just toast for breakfast…"

At his crestfallen look, Olivia immediately kicked herself for blurting out. She grabbed his hands in hers, "I am so sorry - I..I don't know why I said that…" Suddenly there were tears in her eyes that she tried to blink back furiously. She dropped Seth's hands and covered her mouth to stem the sobs that had sprung out of her throat. She froze for a moment, unsure of how to stem the tide of grief that had her in its grip when she felt Seth's hand take her by the arms, gently pulling her towards him. She let herself be held, feeling her arms wrap themselves around Seth's neck and hold on for dear life.

Finally, she felt the choking in her throat subside, the overwhelming heaviness abated, and she could breathe again. She opened her eyes and saw Seth looking at her, his brow furrowed with concern, "Olivia...I don't know what to say…I'm sorry...I - We-we can go eat somewhere else." He had her hands in his now, and started walking them back to the car.

Olivia stopped, keeping Seth's hand firmly in hers. "Seth - Seth, wait. We don't have to go anywhere else - this place is lovely, let's-" she wiped the remaining tears from her eyes, "Let's just go in and have breakfast. I - I appreciate your thoughtfulness, and...and I don't know why Renee was anywhere near my thoughts."

Seth stepped closer, eyebrows raised, "Really?"

Olivia rolled her eyes, "Okay Freud, I know why...but I didn't think breakfast choices would be the trigger for a reaction like that. I'm sorry…"

Seth interrupted, "You do not need to apologize to me after the night you've had - "

"We've had…"

Seth nodded, pulling Olivia a little closer, "Okay...but you don't need to apologize for how you feel - not to me, not ever." He leaned in and kissed her gently, feeling her arms wind their way around his waist under his coat. He felt...he felt like this was not the place or time to get something started. Reluctantly, he pulled away with one final kiss, "We should get in before we cause a car accident - this is a little heavy for before 9 o'clock in Lima, Ohio."

Olivia smiled, "Okay...and thank you for - for being so amazing...I really don't know where I would be without you…"

Seth laced his fingers with Olivia's and started walking back to the cafe, "Well, then it's a good thing it doesn't matter - because the only thing that does is that we're here now, together - the two of us."

Olivia said nothing, but squeezed his hand tightly, feeling her heart pound under her hoodie. Her eyes were still red and her throat felt tight and raw, but she managed a smile at Seth's words and held onto their promise. Some part of her distantly knew that eventually she would be able to forgive Renee and maybe they would be able to repair their tattered relationship. But now the news of the baby, and the secrecy...it was obviously still raw and triggering. Even in the warmth of the summer morning, she shivered and hung on to Seth's arm with both hands as they walked along the sidewalk and into the cafe.

Breakfast was amazing - In a small subconscious act of rebellion, Olivia went for a non-vegan, but still healthy breakfast. She had never had an egg-white only breakfast that actually tasted good, and maybe it was some kind of weird after-effect of the previous twenty-four hours, but the two egg breakfast was the best thing she'd ever tasted. It was also one of the few breakfasts she hadn't actually prepared over the last year, so that in itself made it incredibly enjoyable.

Seth watched her eat, amused at her obvious enjoyment of something so simple, and was reminded of the impact everyday things can have on someone - for good and for bad. He'd been taken completely by surprise at Olvia's reaction to the mention of a vegan breakfast, but he had also been prepared to find another restaurant if she desired. I suppose losing a family member - even temporarily - carries its own grief…

Olivia looked up from her breakfast. "Sorry, what?" she mumbled through her mouthful.

Seth froze, unaware he'd spoken aloud, "Uh - I suppose having that first coffee is something of a relief?"

Olivia narrowed her eyes briefly, sure she had heard something else, and nodded, "It's definitely helping…" She wiped her mouth with a napkin and dismissed her suspicions, "I can feel the cobwebs clearing - and I couldn't eat another bite." She sighed and pushed her plate away, looking regretfully for a moment at the remainder of her home fried potatoes. "Are we just about ready to go? I still need to visit the little girls' room before we hit the road…"

Seth pushed his own plate back in surrender - he'd never been able to finish a breakfast here, despite his best efforts. "Yeah, absolutely, uh - what are you doing?" he asked as Olivia began fishing in her wallet for her bank card.

She looked up at him, eyes wide, "I'm paying for breakfast, what does it look like I'm doing?" She grabbed the bill from his reach and waved it in the air above her head as she walked away from the table, "I'll meet you at the car…"

Seth watched her go with an appreciative smile on his face, admiring not only her resilience, but also the figure she cut as she crossed the crowded floor of the cafe. He checked his watch and sighed, better to do this sooner than later… He dug out his phone and found the contact he was looking for, he hoped it wasn't too early…

"Hey Dean, it's Seth…"