Chapter 28: Tell me you don't want me to

The one where Lucy considers going on a date with Emmett.

Lucy hadn't been sure she was ready for a relationship. Before the whole thing with Caleb she wanted a relationship more than anything, especially because everyone around her was madly in love and she was a little jealous. After Caleb and considering everything that she had going on with Tim (or anything more like it) Lucy had pushed all thoughts of a relationship aside. That was until she met Emmett, he had seam nice, charming and (extremely) handsome and his chivalrousness towards her predicament had steered something in Lucy's heart. While she couldn't deny her feelings for Tim, she didn't see their relationship evolving straight away even if she was finishing her training period soon. She liked the feelings Emmett originated in her, but she didn't want to use him as a substitute for Tim … since when did relationships became so difficult?

"Lucy, were you listening to me?" Grace asked after a full minute passed and she got no reaction from the young female officer, who was clearly lost in her thoughts.

"I'm sorry, I was a little distracted." Lucy admitted blushing slightly, taking her eyes away from Emmett, who was standing by the admissions desk. The truth was she had disconnected as soon as she got the information she wanted of her perp and focused her attention on hot firefighter Emmett.

"Yeah, I could tell." Grace winked at her as she turned to glance at Emmett, who had clearly noticed they were talking about him. "I'm gonna do other things, call me if you need anything else."

"Thanks." Lucy thanked, with a shy smile but grabbed Grace's arm before she could leave. "Nolan misses you; he'll deny it because he wants you to be happy, but he does."

"I miss him too, I'm just a bit confused about what to do." Grace admitted smiling sadly. She needed to do what was better for her son, unfortunately it wasn't what was better for her.

"you'll do what's better, I know it." Lucy assured her, giving her arm a squeeze before the doctor walked away.

"Officer Chen, fun meting you here." Emmett greeted her as he walked closer to her, his smile was so open that it was impossible not to smile back.

"At the hospital, really? Your standards must be pretty low then." She teased back, flirtatiously. She missed this, flirting so openly and easily with someone, it was one of the things that attracted her to Emmett (besides his handsome face) – it was easy to talk to him, effortless.

"I was so entranced by your presence I forgot we were at the hospital." He flirted back and Lucy couldn't help but laugh. Yes, she definitely needed this.

"Real smooth." She added after she had stopped laughing, only now noticing that she had stepped even closer to him, oddly comfortable by the proximity. The only person she had felt this comfortable with, was Tim and it felt weird to be so comfortable with Emmett- almost like a betrayal, so she took a small step back.

"A guy has to pull all the tricks to impress the most beautiful woman here." Emmett added and Lucy smirked, oh he was good but trouble. If her love life wasn't so messed up, she would have been all over that…. like yesterday!

"UAU." Lucy laughed at the tacky comeback, but she felt flattered anyway what women didn't like to be called beautiful. "So, what brings you here?"

"Kid stuck a pencil up his nose." He answered, clearly amused by the entire situation but trying his hardest to remain professional.

"And he didn't google how to get it out?"." Lucy asked surprised, trying to contain her laughter - They didn't make kids like before. She once had stuck seed beans up her nose when she was 4, but she got them out on her own- with no internet!

"Right? I would find a way to get that pencil out before my mother found out or I would get a swatting… kids have it too easy now." He added, laughing, and making Lucy laugh.

"I guess they do." She agreed, the two falling in comfortable silence and Lucy took the opportunity to observe Emmett. She really did have thing for men in uniform, in fact Armstrong advice couldn't be more clear – She was better of with someone on the force and maybe the LAFD was the closest she would get, considering that Tim was prohibited territory.

"So… have you given much thought about going on a date with me?" He asked tentatively, observing her reaction closely.

"Ugh…" Lucy answered, caught of guard by his question. She wanted to say yes so badly but her conscious was making it hard for her to formulate an answer.

"Don't sweat it." Emmett said quickly when he noticed her mental dilemma, his gorgeous but relaxed smile not faltering.

"No, it's not that. I want to be sure I'm really ready for that." She clarified, she wanted him to know that her hesitation had nothing to do with him. She wanted to make sure she wanted to go out with him for him and not because she couldn't go with a certain blue eyed someone.

"No pressure, whenever you're ready but I would really like to take you out to dinner." He reassured her at the same time, making it clear that he didn't plan on giving up on her that easily.

"I would like…" Lucy began to say with a smile. When she felt ready, she would like very much to go out with him.

"Boot, what are you doing?" Tim's voice cut her short before she could finish the rest of the sentence and both, Emmett and her, turned to look at him. He looked pissed, arms crossed over his chest as he approached them. Oh, it was bad- she was totally fucked.

"I…" Lucy began to say, completely lost for words as he came to stand close to her. She felt anger eradiate from him, like never before and she couldn't pinpoint why.

"You developed quiet a habit for chatting on the job." He cut her short once more and the bitter jab, hurt her feelings more than she expected. Tim had become more relaxed with her training and it didn't bother him anymore when she stopped to chat for a few minutes.

"I was just…" Lucy tried to explain, looking for a way to paraphrase what she meant to say without getting her in more trouble.

"Actually, I intersected Lucy. She's completely innocent." Emmet came to her rescue, stepping closer to the two officers. Lucy smiled at him in thanks for stepping up, while Tim simply turned his annoyed glare to him.

"I highly doubt it, Lang. I was waiting, can we speak to Matheson or not?" He asked turning towards Lucy. His tone wasn't as rude but still harsh enough that it left no room for contestation.

"Yes, Grace said he was clear, he was faking more than anything else." She explained slightly off, remembering her conversation with Grace about their perp that made a huge deal about being tackled…the flower.

"Well then go handle it Boot." Tim ordered, like it was obvious. He wanted to end this shitshow as quickly as possible. Jealousy really was a green-eyed monster.

"Wha…" Lucy asked, completely confused by his reaction. They had been getting along so well for the past few months that she didn't expect this reaction from him.

"I can still fail you, even if you are close to the finish line." He threatened and regretted it immediately, when Lucy's face showed even more disappointment and sadness at his words. Way to really fuck shit up, Tim!

"I'm going." Lucy rose her hands up in surrender, frowning further at his annoying attitude. "I'll see you around, Emmett."

"I'll wait for your call." Emmett added smiling softly at her but dropping the smile as soon as Lucy turned around. "That was a shit move, Bradford." Emmett added after Lucy had walked away.

"I'm doing my job Lang and Chen shouldn't use her time at work for personal business." He explained, stepping closer to the firefighter, towering slightly over him. He didn't have any problem with Emmett, well he didn't have one until they added Lucy Chen to the mix.

"Please, you are jealous." Emmett stated, not allowing himself to be intimidated by the older officer. He might be young and a naturally easy going guy but he wasn't an idiot, besides anyone could see that Tim and Lucy were more than partners.

"Jealous? Of what?" Tim asked, crossing his arms over his chest and smirking at Emmett, in a futile attempt to seam uninterested.

"I'm not blind Bradford. I see how you look at her, damn I see how she looks at you." Emmett laughed drily, he wasn't blind and naturally he too felt jealous, but he wasn't about to be an idiot about it. "But if it calms your horses, I don't think she was going to say yes anyways."

"That's none of my business." Tim tried to deflect the affirmation, but it did make him slightly happy to know that Lucy wasn't quick to give Emmett an answer. He knew that feeling happy for her dilemma was selfish, but Tim was a selfish man, especially when it came to Lucy.

"Sure, let's pretend I believe in that." Emmett answered, not one bit convinced.

"Lucy is more than capable of deciding what's best for her. Just know that if you hurt her, you'll have to deal with me." Tim threatened, meaning every word. Emmett Lang was a good guy but not good enough for Lucy, he actually doubted anyone would ever be.

"Not jealous, ugh? Besides Lucy can handle herself, you are not her saviour Bradford." Emmett smirked, apparently the big bad Tim Bradford did have a weak point.

"You know, what Lang? I told her, she was too good for you, but she'll see that eventually." Tim glared back at him, he knew he wasn't her saviour, but he had promised her and himself to always look after her and he wasn't about to break it.

"Oh! and you are better, uhm Bradford?"

"No, I'm not." He admitted honestly, it pained him to say it, but he was aware that he wasn't the best option for Lucy. He was too broken, too hard-headed for her soft heart, but he couldn't stay away from her, no matter how much he tried.

"Gentleman is there any problem?" A nurse asked, coming to stand by two clearly aware of the tension and trying to avoid any further altercations.

"No, not at all." The two men answered at the same time, taking a step away from each other. Clearly there was a big problem between them, one with big beautiful brown eyes that was completely worth all the trouble. Still, Tim couldn't help feel that he was the one in disadvantage, no matter how much he wanted Lucy for himself, he couldn't put his interests in front of hers and that was clearly a problem that Emmett didn't have to deal with.

"You have no idea how much I needed this drink." Lucy told her two fellow Rookies has they sat down at their favourite local cop bar. She took a big swing from her drink, she deserved it after all Tim's mood had not been the best after their little encounter with Emmett and it rose even more question about what she should do.

"Oh, do tell Miss Chen!" John told her, laughing slightly at her exasperated look, as he took a sip from his beer.

"So, I ran into Emmett at the hospital today…" She began to say with a soft smile but Jackson interrupted her excitedly.

"Hot firefighter Emmett?" Jackson asked excitedly, while he adores Sterling and he's the only man he wants, he isn't blind, and Emmett is a fine example of a man- even Sterling agrees.

"Yes Jackson." Lucy answered, smiling at her roommate who had made it pretty clear what he thought about Emmett. "So, I was talking to Emmett and he came and acted like a complete idiot."

"Really? I totally wonder why." Jackson asked rhetorically, looking at Lucy from the top of his drink. For someone so intelligent, Lucy could be soo blind when it came to men.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Lucy asked him.

"He was jealous Lucy." Jackson cleared like it was obvious, rolling his eyes. Did he have to explain everything to her?

"What no!?" Lucy answered incredulously, it couldn't be it. Yes, the feelings they had for one another were getting more obvious as the days passed, but Tim was a very controlled person- he wouldn't let jealousy control his actions.

"Wait, why would Bradford be jealous of Emmett and Lucy?" John asked, completely at lost in the conversation. Sure, Lucy and Tim had a strange dynamic, working more as partners than T.O.- Rookie, but he never gave it much thought.

"Really? How can you be that clueless?" Jackson asked, looking surprised at John and even though Lucy was completely embarrassed, she laughed at it. "You seriously didn't notice the sexual tension between these two."

"It's more like just tension." Lucy corrected, smacking Jackson across his arm and observing John's reaction carefully.

"Please I'm waiting for you two to rip each other's clothes of and stop pretending." Jackson joked and Lucy rolled her eyes, he was helpless. "Lopez and I have a bet going on about who makes the first move and when. Do you want in?"

"Jackson!" Lucy swatted him multiple times, making her roommate laugh even harder. At least her love life entertained someone.

"No, I think." John answered, looking slightly confused but smiled softly at Lucy, who looked extreme concerned for his reaction. "I guess it makes sense."

"What?" Lucy asked surprise, were they really that obvious to everyone else!?

"I don't know but I guess you two just gravitate towards each other." John admitted nodding his head, it was true whether it was on a stakeout, on a routine call or just drinks at their local cop bar, Tim and Lucy always managed to stay together and he could find them occasionally glancing at each other. He just thought it was because they were such good partners, apparently it was more complicated than that.

"See I told you soo." Jackson sang cockily, avoiding another smack from Lucy

"I'm never telling you anything again." Lucy threatened in vain, Jackson was her best friend and as much as she hated to admit it: A pretty good relationship therapist.

"Like you can help it." Jackson mocked her and Lucy rolled her eyes, she didn't have that much self-control not to tell him. "So, what was going on between you and Emmett to make Tim lose control?"

"He asked me out again and I have no idea what to do." Lucy admitted, taking a big swing of her drink.

"First you need to figure out what you and Tim are." Jackson told her, as much as he liked to watch the two play Mr and Miss Coy it was going to lead them nowhere or lead them into more trouble than needed…. In his opinion they should hop into bed, give it a test drive and if successful move from there. Really, why waist so much time? If the sex isn't good than probably their relationship won't hold.

"Easier said than done." Lucy muttered, downing the rest of her cocktail and laying the cup down on the table, resting her head on it. Why couldn't she have had a ugly mid 50's T.O. with too much of a bubbly personality, he certainly wouldn't be her type and she wouldn't be in this mess.

"Why not try things out with Tim?" John asked simply, from her seat across from them and Both, Lucy and Jackson, looked at him incredulously.

"I didn't want to be the woman who slept with her fellow rookie, do I think I want to be the one who slept with her T.O.?" She asked rhetorically and Nolan shrugged in understanding, that would be definitely a lot worst. Maybe she should have listened to her parents and not join LAPD and because she had, this was her punishment: her dream Job or her dream man.

"Maybe you need to let go of Bradford for a while." Jackson suggested, Lucy was a strong independent woman but when it came to Tim Bradford that independency flew out the door. It was like he was her Oxygen and her his, maybe the separation would put things in perspective for the two.

"How can I let go of something I never had?" Lucy whispered, that was the dark truth there was no denying that there was definitely feelings between them, but they never even fully acknowledged it. What if separation caused a drift between them that couldn't be fixed? It was a thought too uncertain and scary.

"Maybe you start by removing his picture of your lock screen." Jackson teased Lucy and she answered by showing him her tong. He knew that the photo was more of a joke than anything but still a constant reminder of him. "You can keep Emmet hanging if you don't see it going anywhere." Jackson remembered her, and Lucy nodded it wasn't fair to lead him on. "You just have to be ok losing him, especially if things with Bradford don't work out."

"Why is being a grown up so fucking hard?" Lucy asked, throwing her head back in exasperation.

"Look if you think that Bradford may be the one than he is worth the risk, he's worth the wait and whatever heartbreak may happen." John rested his hand on hers and gave it a squeeze. Lucy was a intuitive woman and if Tim Bradford was the one who lit up her entire wiring, then he might be pretty damn worth it.

"How do you know someone is worth it?" She asked, looking up at Nolan. Even if his recent love life wasn't the best, he had been though some earth-shattering love stories and she only had a fantasy.

"You just do, you feel it in his words, in his actions. You know because he's the only person you think about and the one who makes you wish for more." John explain and Lucy sighed, resting her head on the bar's table. How could she chose someone else, over the person that remembered her how to breathe again? She knew that Tim as worth it but what if Emmet was too?

As Lucy drove home, her head couldn't stop swirling. She was completely torn with what to do and it seamed that her conversation with Jackson and John only made things worst. She had no idea what to do, she just knew she couldn't have both Emmett and Tim, but her indecisiveness put her at risk of losing both. Tim was her person, he completed Lucy like no one before had but the truth was the two of them were far away from happening, too many things stood between them. And Emmett was novelty, fun, exciting and much more tangible but he didn't erupt in her the feelings Tim did. She was truly screwed and had no clue what to do, she needed to talk and only one person could truly help her. She made a U-turn, earning a couple honks from the cars behind her "Sorry, Sorry." She apologised for cutting them but not slowing down a bit until she reached her destination.

She parked her small car behind Tim's truck and ran up to his door, knocking hard on the door until he opened up, rubbing sleep from his eyes. "Lucy, is everything ok?"

"Yes, sorry but I really needed to speak with you." She answered quickly when she noticed him evaluating her attentively for any injuries. She adverted her eyes from his chiselled chest and focused on the details on his door, if she kept looking at him, she would end up off point.

"Do you want to come in?" He asked, crossing his arm over his chest. He knew this was a conversation that would probably take a while, considering that it usually did when one showed up at the others door in the middle of the night.

"No, it's better I don't" She answered, as much as she wanted to get him and sit down in his comfortable couch Lucy needed to get this done and over with or she would never have the balls to do so.. the little alcohol she had in her system was already running out.

"Okay…" He answered, waiting for her to continue. He could tell whatever she wanted to talk about had been consuming her and he suspected it had something to do with the freaking circus he caused with Emmett Land that morning.

"Emmett asked me out." Lucy blurted out, gulping loudly. She wasn't afraid of his reaction, but she feared that it might shift their relationship and the thought terrified her. Especially when she was so close to ending her training period, everything was changing, and she could not handle losing him completely.

"I know that, it was kind of obvious." Tim added in his best unimported voice, he wanted to be outrightly jealous, but he couldn't. He didn't have the right not when he couldn't offer her what Emmett could.

"I am not sure what to do…" She admitted fearfully, she prided herself in being a confident, independent woman but when it came to this, she was completely lost.

"And what …"

"Tell me you don't want me to go out with him." She interrupted him and almost like ordered him. She wanted to put an end to this nonsense, caution to the wind.

"I can't tell you that and you know it." He sighed dejectedly. He simply couldn't do it, he could put her through the pain it would cause her. He could handle the jabs, the sneering, hell he could even handle being a Officer for the rest of his life (because that would be what happened if anyone knew he was involved with his Rookie) but he couldn't do that to her. She had an entire life, an entire career ahead of her and he couldn't be the one stopping her from achieving what she wanted.

"Why?" She stuttered, she wanted him to fight for her like there was no tomorrow even if it wasn't the most sensible approach.

"It's not fair for me to tell you how to live your life, Lucy." He clarified softly, understanding her dilemma perfectly. Maybe if they had met in any different situation, their life would be much different, but they had to do what was best under their circumstances and right now, he wasn't the best thing for her.

"You want me not to go." She emphasized; she could tell in his eyes that it was what he truly wanted to say but couldn't. Maybe she was reaching too much but it was what she wanted to hear, what she needed to hear.

"No, I want you to do what makes you happier no matter what I think." He insisted. Yes, he didn't want her to date other people but more than anything he wanted her to do what made her happy, hopefully it would involve him if not know then in the future.

"I don't know what to do that's the thing. I'm afraid if I do it, I lose…" He stopped her before she could even finish: I lose you. Hadn't she been soo stressed, Tim would have laughed: he was sure she could never lose him, no matter what happened. He cared to much for her to allow that to happen.

"You don't have to lose anything you know!? Why would you?" He asked her, he would never make her chose between him and Emmett. One it wasn't fair to her and second, he was too scared she would choose Emmett for some reason. Emmett was a good person and he doubted he would ever make Lucy chose but if he did, oh man would he be in deep trouble.

"I'm letting go..." She fought back her tears, not wanting to cry. She had never cried like she did this last year, but she couldn't handle the though of letting him go.

"No! No one is going anywhere for a while and you know it. It's ok to live your life Lucy, you don't need to let go of one thing to have another." He comforted her, resting his hand gently on her arm. Even if she wanted, he doubted she could get rid of him. He suspected it, but since the entire thing with Caleb Tim realised that Lucy was a crucial part of him – one that he could no longer completely function without, she had made him better like no one else never had.

"But don't I?" She asked, how could she? How could she try things out with Emmett when her mind was full of Tim Bradford and how could she let go of the man that helped her save herself?

"I'll be always here for you no matter what, no matter who and you know it." He assured her, she knew that yes, but it still felt good to hear it from him. Tim wasn't ready to give up Lucy yet, especially when they didn't even give it a chance but still he wasn't going to stop her from paving her own way in this world. When or if something flourished between them, he didn't want either of them to point faults at each other and for that they had to live their lives on their own way, until they were ready.

"I…" She began, not sure exactly of what she wanted to say. She expected him to react more volatility, more Officer Bradford like but instead he reacted like the Tim she cared soo much for: putting her interests in front of his, like he had done soo many times before.

"Would you tell me to stop living my life?" He asked her, knowing perfectly well what her answer would be. Lucy was incapable of putting her happiness above anyone else's.

"Of course not." She answered quickly, she would never stop him for living his life… even if it didn't include her, no matter how much it pained her.

"Then I can't tell you to do the same." He added, holding her arms firmly, but gently, to pass his point across. Yes, seeing her with Emmett (if it happened) would be a bitch but he could do it if it meant seeing her happy. "It's ok, maybe it won't be easy, but it will be ok."

"I just…don't want to hurt anyone." She admitted almost like a painful confession, it terrified her that if she made the wrong decision, she could end up hurting two good men. Tim felt her struggle, her pain so he did what he did best, pulled her into his arms and allowed his warmth to comfort her.

"You won't." He reassured her, Lucy was too much of a good person to hurt someone else intentionally, even if emotionally, and anyone who didn't see that didn't deserve her. Her caring nature was what made her soo strong, soo beautiful … at least to him.

"How do you always know what to say?" Lucy asked, laying her head against his chest, how could he raise soo many doubts in her and at the same time calm her all together, just with some words and his presence.

"I'm the T.O. after all." He said but what her really wanted to say was that he was the better choice because he knew her so well, instead he contented himself with holding her in his arms for a little longer. "Now that you are here, you can take Cojo on a walk." He added teasingly.

"What?" She asked confuses as she pulled away from his embrace, pulling her jacket tighter around herself, so that she wouldn't feel the cold nights breeze.

"What? You woke me up at 1 a.m. and don't expect any consequences?" Tim asked in his best T.O. tone, after all he didn't have much time left to use it (officially), but with no actual severity in it.

"I don't even know why I bother. Go get him then." She told him, crossing her arms over her chest but not really bothered. She liked taking Cojo on walks, especially because usually Tim would join and because it gave her a sense that Cojo was in somehow still hers.

"Let me just get my sneakers…" He informed her pushing the door further open, there was no way he was getting much sleep after this. "What you thought I would leave you alone with him? You spoil him too much." He added when he noticed Lucy's questioning look, she thought it was a punishment but maybe it's just another excuse for them to spend more time together, it was going to be hard to get up for their shift tomorrow.

Lucy smiled as Tim ran back inside to put on some sneakers and a shirt over his pyjama pants, leaving the door open in case she wanted to go inside as well. Maybe it wasn't so bad giving Emmett a chance, she wasn't marrying the guy. it could be just drinks or maybe something more, who knows? What truly relaxed her was that Tim would be there every step of the way, no matter where or with who she ended up. Maybe that should have the heads up she needed that no other relationship was going to work out but for now she content with being friends. How long that would last, she didn't know, what mattered was that Tim was in for the long haul and so was she.

Hey Guys, Chapter 28! I hope you enjoy it, even though I was late to post, I was very excited for this chapter and I'm really happy with how it turned out. I have not seen episode 19, so all this happened before it. By what I read (I can't resist spoilers) Lucy will approach Emmett as something more casual and I agree, hopefully I portrait it here through Tim's and Lucy's conversation.

Regarding the next chapters, I will still post 2 times this week (hopefully if I can obey to a schedule) and then I will be taking a pause until I take my big exam on the 30th of May, I will post only if I have a overload of creativity that might happen depending on how good the season finale is. So, I don't know how much more I'll write on The one where, considering that I have it linked to the show and I don't want to forward it too much for season 3. I am thinking about writing a fanfiction about Lucy's and Tim's future and one that is off character for the two, all one shots. What do you think? Let me know pleaseeeeeee!

-XO!