Chapter 23

Jimmy groaned as he tried to shift on the ground. He was sore. He stretched out his right arm. The numbness was still there. He looked around and saw Kid again. He had forgotten where he was for a minute. He looked the other way.

"Morning. Coffee?"

Jimmy shook his head but Kid walked over and gave him a cup anyway. He just held the cup watching the steam roll off the liquid inside.

"You just refuse to eat don't ya?"

Jimmy didn't answer him. He just sat looking at the cup.

"Well, I'll have us something to eat in just a minute."

Jimmy watched Kid's back as he walked around the small campsite. For a minute, it seemed like nothing at all had happened between them. It seemed just like the old days. He smelled the cup. He broke down and took a sip.

"You need to eat more. I don't see how you stand it. Not eating." Kid rambled on. "I know money is hard to come by sometimes but there is always something you could hunt to eat."

"Ain't that."

Kid didn't turn around. He just kept cooking over the fire.

"Ain't what?"

"Money."

"Then why ain't you eating?"

"I can't."

"You can't eat?"

"And I gave it all away."

"The money?"

"Yeah."

"Gave it away?"

"To them. For the girls."

Kid smiled with his back still to Jimmy. He hadn't completely forgotten who he once was. He had to keep him talking.

"What about Maddie? That's her name right?"

"Yeah."

"How old?"

"Over a year now."

"Where's her ma?"

"Dead."

Kid paused trying to think of what to say next. He had him talking and didn't want him to close up again.

"How?"

"Because of me."

"You couldn't have killed her. I know better than that."

Jimmy got quiet. Kid tensed and waited. He heard him start talking very quietly.

"She was a whore in Dodge City. I had been there tracking some men for a few weeks. I became a regular. I left a while later. I was passing back through when I went to see her. It had been months. I don't keep track of time. I was told she wasn't there. Another girl told me that she was pregnant and the owner had locked her away until she had the baby. I had that girl sneak me in to see her after she told me that it was mine. He had locked her in a back room. She was filthy and so was the room. He had beat her until I didn't know it was her. I took her out. Ended up killing two of his men. One was his son. I took her to her sister's. Maddie was born soon after. I left them there. Came back through later to give her some money. The house was empty."

Kid listened but still didn't look at him.

"Neighbor had Maddie. Said several men came one night. He had tracked her down. Killed the sister and her husband then Lilah. That was her name. Left Maddie upstairs alone. The old man next door found them and her. He buried them. His wife cared for Maddie. She gave her to me with a slip of paper. Had her name and the day she was born on it. I left with her."

"Then you took her home to Rachel?"

"No. I had her for two months but I am a bounty hunter. I needed money for her. The trail ain't no place for a child. I took her then."

"Jimmy, sounds like you took the blame for Lilah's death."

"It's always because of me. If I hadn't seen her, she would still be there. Alive. And her family. I killed his men. His son. He should have killed me. Not them."

"If it weren't you then it would have been someone else. It came with her job."

"No. It was on me."

"You need to look at both sides."

"I need you to marry Lou. Be a father to Rosalyn and Maddie. I need for them to forget that I ever existed. Don't tell them about me."

Kid turned around then.

"Jimmy, I can't do that. It wouldn't be right."

"Damnit Kid. It is."

"What about Lou and her feelings?"

"She can't stand me. I see it in her face."

"You're wrong."

"She can't forgive me. I took everything away from her. I took away her trust, her job, her respect. I took away her life."

"She had a choice in it too. She could have married to avoid it all. But she didn't. She chose to do it on her own and hope that one day you'd come back. You didn't take away her life. You gave her one."

"No. I took away her choices. I didn't give her a chance to decide on her own. Just like it has always been and always will be. I bring death to anyone that's around me."

Jimmy stood and swayed for a minute before limping over to his horse.

"Where are you going?"

"Away."

Kid went over and grabbed Jimmy's shoulder turning him around.

"The hell you are. I could have killed you yesterday but something made me stop. I let you get away before but I ain't gonna let you keep treating her like this. You're going with me."

"The fuck I am." Jimmy stated.

Kid swung with everything he had. His first hit Jimmy right above his eye. Kid watched him slump to the ground. He shook his head. He went and got a piece of rope and tied Jimmy's hands together. He took his guns and put them in his saddle bag. They would leave as soon as he woke and ate.