A/N: Hi everyone! Sorry I haven't been updating much lately. Between work, settling into our new home and going out to protest when my fiance and I can: We have been very busy. For everyone who is still protesting, keep it up! I am so proud of you guys! Keep up the fight and change will come. BLACK. LIVES. MATTER!
Fitz sat across the man that his nightmares were filled with. The man that caused all of his hurt and anger. All he could think about were the times when he would strike him and would not feed him for the whole day if he did something wrong. Fitz's biological dad reached across to tough his son and Fitz instalty flinched away. After all those years he still had that effect on Fitz.
"I am so sorry...I didn't mean to scare you…."
"You didn't scare me Adam!" Fitz defended his actions.
"I can see it in your eyes….I am a monster I know….I just want to start out by saying how sorry I am...All these years I've spent in prison it enabled me to get clean, sober up and reflect. I was so fucked up from the war son…."
"You are nothing but a sperm donor…..I am not your son!" Fitz yelled out to his biological father.
"I'm sorry Fitzgerald….I am trying….Just give me some time….All I want to do is apologize and have a talk with you…." Liam pleaded and Fitz folded his arms and nodded.
"I had such PTSD Fitzgerald….I know it does not explain why I was so terrible to you or your mother, but I was in my own hell….Everynight all I could hear were people's screams….I started using drugs and drinking alcohol because I wanted to drown out those screams. I couldn't stand it and I was easily irritable….I was so horrible to you...God I am so so sorry….Please forgive me…." Liam begged his son. Fitz didn't say anything for a while and it made Liam nervous. He looked like he was having an inner battle.
"Why didn't you love me…..?'" Fitz sounded so broken and vulnerable.
"If you would have been what I have seen and what I did over there….I thought I didn't deserve love so I couldn't love you….I became a monster I swore to protect the children and citizens of America from…..I do love you...I know you want nothing to do with me, but i just wanted to see you one more time before I die…..Once I learned your new name I did some research...I am so so so proud of you Fitz...Your accomplishments are amazing…..What I am most proud of is that you didn't become a man like me….."
With that statement Fitz was shocked because he never thought he would hear those words from his biological father. This whole conversation has been surreal. Fitz didn't know how he'd feel about it.
"Do you have a family Fitzgerald….?"
"Yes I do…" Fitz answered as he reached out to his phone to show Liam the picture of Olivia and the kids.
"This is my fiance Olivia and our children Cassie and Tyler...Technically they are her children...But, I love those two children like they were my own…."
"They are beautiful Fitzgerald…."
"After you went to jail my dad and my mom adopted me...I have two sisters and a brother…" Fitz pulled up a family picture of Big Jerry and Adele sitting with Fitz standing next to his father besides the couch. Then the twins in their dress whites behind their parents and Amy smiling next to them.
"Seems like you were in good hands….I was so worried that I had messed your life up…"
"You did….You did….I was so fucked up because of you...I still am trying to understand why you had to take out all of your anger and aggression on your son that was a toddler. I am 47 Liam and I still have to go to therapy because of you….I didn't for the longest time know how to love someone properly because of you...But, I was determined to be better than you….." Fitz didn't know how to feel. He felt hurt, sad, relieved, and confused. One hand he wanted to forget his biological father and walk out of here, but on the other he wanted answers and to forgive.
"I want to forgive you, but….you hurt me so much…" Fitz's voice cracked when he said that sentence.
They were both crying.
"I am so sorry….I didn't mean to hurt you by wanting to see you...I wish there was a way I could take everything back but I can't….It hurts me to see you this hurt because of my actions…."
"I have to go…."
"Okay Fitzgerald…." Liam nodded in defeat.
"Oh and it's Fitz….." Everyone calls me Fitz. With that being said Fitz left and he had his tears flowing down his face.
He knew he needed to see his dad right now. Fitz drove to his parents house and went straight to his father's study. Big Jerry was surprised to see his son and stood up instantly and opened his arms to Fitz. His son looked like he needed the hug. Fitz hugged Big Jerry and just cried.
"Thank you for loving me dad….Thank you for taking me in with the condition I was in….Thank you for never letting me doubt your love for me…."
"I love you my son…."
"I love you too dad…."
"How did the visit go?"
"I don't know dad...He apologized and sounded like he meant it, but he hurt me so much….I am still trying to wrap around my head how you can hurt your child….I am so grateful to have you in my life….I am about to marry the woman I love...I am a father and our family will grow...I just wanted to thank you and mom for having space in your hearts for me…." Big Jerry got emotional at that statement because he does love his boy a lot and he doesn't often get declarations like that from Fitz's so it meant extra special.
"I would choose you over and over again my son….I will always be your father and I will love you unconditionally. Now go hug your mom and get back to your fiance." Fitz hugged his dad again and did as he was told. When he got home he found Olivia was reading in their living room. The sight of her in their home was beautiful. Fitz just walked over to her and bent down to kiss Olivia. It was a passion filled kiss.
"I know you had a heavy day….What can I do….?" Olivia cupped Fitz's face.
"Hold me...Kiss me...and never stop loving me…." Fitz pleaded.
"I can do all of that…." Olivia smiled and opened her arms, which Fitz's went willingly.
"Thank you for loving me Livvie….."
"You don't need to thank me for something like loving you….Loving you was one of the best things I've ever done…." Fitz laid his head in Olivia's lap as she played with his hair.
"I don't know how to feel about Liam, Livvie….He apologized and said he regrets how he treated me….I am torn between forgetting about him or helping him…."
"The Fitzgerald Thomas Grant the Third I know how to help anyone in need….I think you are on your way of forgiving him…."
"I don't think I really want him in our lives…."
"Then I support you on that babe…"
"But, I do want to help him….I want to give him a place to live and some money to get his life started...This can be his second chance…..I also want to start a foundation that helps veterans that are homeless, forgotten and are in need of any help….No child deserves what happened to me….I want to help prevent any more children getting hurt like I did….As well as the soldiers that needs to be taken care of after they come back from battle….The ones that are forgotten by the government….."
"I am so proud of you Fitz...You are an amazing man….You don't deserve what happened to you….but it made you into the man you are today….I am so lucky to have you….Our children are lucky to have you….And the baby inside me is very lucky to have you as a daddy…." Olivia brought Fitz's hand up to her flat stomach. When Fitz registered the words she just said he jumped up to his sitting position.
"LIVVIE! WHAT DID YOU SAY?"
"We're having a baby Fitz…."
"I love you so much Livvie…." Fitz grabbed Olivia's face and kissed her with force.
He couldn't love this woman then right now. She made him so happy.
"I love you too Fitz….I took three test they all came back positive, but I made an appointment with my OBGYN to confirm it….." Olivia and Fitz smiled at each other's eyes. That night they made love to each other all night long as both were excited for the future ahead of them. The next morning Olivia and Fitz woke up and got dressed for the OBGYN appointment. To say Fitz was excited was an understatement. Olivia wore khakis chinos and a denim long sleeve quarter button shirt. She paired that with tan wedges. Fitz wore a long sleeved white button down, with navy blue fitted dress pants, with brown loafers.
Olivia looked at her man like he was good enough to eat.
"You are too sexy for your own good…." Olivia bit her bottom lip.
"Behave Livvie….But thank you I know I'm sexy." Fitz smirked. Olivia rolled her eyes and then smiled at Fitz. Together they got into Fitz G-wagon and drove to the OBGYN's office. When they got there the two were basically called in immediately. The doctor came in and spoke to both Olivia and Fitz. A couple of hours later they got their result.
"Congratulations Olivia you are four weeks pregnant." The doctor smiled.
Both Fitz and Olivia were crying as he took her into his arms.
"Thank you so much for giving me one of the best gifts a man could receive baby….."