Hi everyone.
I slowed a bit with the updates because I needed to figure out how can I make everything as random as possible, this is it!
Another day another lecture they said, who was that "They"? That's the mystery second only to "Where does Izuku pull the signs out of?".
The members of class 1-A were starting to become friends as the initial embarrassment was mostly gone, Katsumi was already seen as a domineering personality, matched in terms of power only by Shoto Todoroki, after these two came the unexplored potential of Momo Yaoyorozu, the other students had their respective strengths, from the raw power of Sato to the versatility of Uraraka, there was, however, one particular student that was still an enigma, Midoriya Izuku, the mime with the quirk that didn't make any sense, he could make cars but he couldn't make simpler things, like a backpack, in fact when he made one for Kaminari the day before, because he melted his with his electricity, Kaminari couldn't feel the backpack at all and when the mime stopped touching the "box" in which Kaminari's books were it dissolved.
A loud sound of footsteps came from the corridor, a massive figure could be seen behind the door of the class.
"I am here, entering through the door like a normal person."
"Holy crap it's All Might!"
"He's in his silver age costume!"
"He's nearly as fantastique as moi!"
And a whole lot of other excited phrases were being thrown into the air, Izuku could distinguish the emitter of only one of them, for obvious reasons.
"SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU EXTRAS!" oh, right, he could recognize that person too.
"Thank you young Bakugou for the help, but I believe you should work on your...rather colorful vocabulary…"
"Young Midoriya why do you feel like a long-time enemy?"
Izuku lifted his shoulders, he didn't know, then he threw out of the window the sign saying "We meet again All Might, after all that happened." guess he would never know.
"We are going to do battle training, but before...YOUR HERO COSTUMES! They are already in a briefcase in your lockers. As they say, the costume makes the hero."
Izuku sweatdropped "Sir, it's: the attire doesn't make the monk."
All Might simply ignored the comment, his "Teaching for Dummies" book didn't prepare him for a situation like that.
Five minutes later they were in the changing rooms, he found his mime costume in his locker, it was his old, dear costume; he looked around and he saw something which made him question his existence: How did Iida's costume fit in the briefcase?
Excited as they were both boys and girls got changed really fast, All Might was impressed "I'm glad to see you all changed fast, rapidity is fundamental, imagine being under attack, you would need to be ready as fast as possible."
In Kamino ward a man whose face looked like a potato sneezed, who could be thinking about him?
"Yo nerd, why does the half 'n' half bastard look like terminator?"
"Dunno, by the way you look good."
"Thanks, you look the same as always…" Katsumi deadpanned
Uraraka was behind most of her classmates, she was covering herself, unsure of her costume when she saw Mineta approach her, she feared for the worst.
"Uraraka, believe me when I say I'm not going to be perverted at the moment. I think I can understand how you feel, after all I went from a cup of grapes to wearing a diaper…"
"You're right, I shouldn't be ashamed of nothing."
"You shouldn't, you have quite the nice features."
Uraraka didn't know if she should be thankful for the compliment or if she should be angry at the boy, he seemed less perverted than usual so she decided to ignore the # on her forehead."
"Now, we are going to do a simulation!"
"so we're basically playing heroes and villains?" asked Kastumi
"Well no, but actually yes. You will be divided into teams of two, the villains will have to protect a bomb while the heroes will have to either capture the villains or secure the bomb. This reminds me of when I played CSGO in my youth.."
"SIR I DON'T THINK I UNDERSTOOD THE LAST PART!" shouted Iida, almost as loud as the blonde hero.
"And I have to ask, how are we going to decide the teams?" he immediately asked.
"It was just an old man rambling… the teams will be extracted from this box. As pros you won't always have the luxury to choose your allies."
"Any questions?" he saw Aoyama's eyes sparkling "Serious questions."
Aoyama's eyes sparkled even more "Isn't my cape, no my costume, no directly the whole of moi, absolutely…" "Fantastique…" groaned the rest of the class in their thoughts "delightful?"
Denki fell on the floor in shock, Kirishima's jaw was nearly dislocated and Mina had to slap herself to be convinced she wasn't dreaming.
All Might facepalmed "Yes, you are. Let's now start with the first pair: Midoriya and Ashido against Todoroki and Iida!" after saying that he went towards the control room, signing to the rest of the students to follow him.
From the speakers All Might's voice announced "You now have five minutes for planning, I start a countdown you can hear when there are only thirty seconds remaining, after that you will have ten minutes for this simulation battle."
"So, mimey, what are we gonna do?" asked Mina "We are against two monsters while i don't even understand a fraction of you."
Izuku simply smiled and he started miming.
"What are you doing? Oh, wait, i get it, you can't talk while you're in your costume right? You're such a showman!"
In the control room Katsumi growled "It's his quirk dumbass." she had to admit she was a bit jealous, after all Mina was an extrovert person and she wasn't as far from Izuku as she would like, she then looked at herself, she felt a bit "underdeveloped"
The countdown started.
"GO!" shouted All Might from the speaker.
Iida an Todoroki shot forward, their plan, well, they didn't have one, Todoroki just said "I will overpower them."
They, however, didn't expect Ashido out of the building, sticking her tongue out to provocate them then running away, they sprinted towards her, and they fell, the same thing had happened to Iida during the entrance exam, they mentally cursed the mime as they got up.
Well…. just Todoroki got up, Iida didn't have enough flexibility in his armor to stand up, he just said, in a low voice that would fit a dying man "Todoroki… go… for her… I can mana….ge alone…" the heterochromatic teen was already gone, he didn't care in the first place.
Iida managed to roll on his back and he tried to stand up, to no avail.
In the control room half of the class was on the floor, crying for the laughter
"He's a fucking turtle on his back." said Katsumi, she then proceeded to snatch the mic from All Might "If you don't get back up in thirty seconds you are going to be called turtle boy from now on." she waited for thirty seconds "Turtle boy it is."
Now Iida was red from the embarrassment, after a full minute he managed to stand up and he saw the mime laughing at him "Villain I give you a chance to redeem yourself, hand over the bomb you are...holding over your head?"
Izuku snickered, he turned around and he started running in his signature "Beep-Beep." way.
Iida ran after him, Izuku turned around the corner of the building and so did Iida, they continued to do so for two complete rotations around the building.
"As everyone can see fucking turtle boy has become a mixture of Wile E. Coyote and Tom, run you fucking mixture of a blue bird and a mouse!" shouted someone in the microphone, it was so,so insanely difficult to guess who it was.
"Three minutes remaining." communicated All Might, who apparently had managed to get the microphone back.
Iida was confused, embarrassed, pissed, but he was enjoying it in a sense, he felt like a kid once again, so he decided to pull the trick that would win every tag game when he was a kid: stopping behind a corner and waiting.
He, however, hadn't noticed that Izuku had been sitting on the roof for a few minutes, watching robocop run after nothing.
"One minute remaining!"
Iida was getting annoyed, had the mime seen through his plan? Impossible.
He felt a finger touch his shoulder, he smacked it away "Not now Todoroki, you will blow my cover." the finger tapped on his shoulder again, he felt a glove over the finger "Not now Midoriya, I am waiting for you to show up."
"Ten seconds remaining!"
iida turned to the mime "How do I catch you? Where have you gone?" he said shaking him "Wait a minute...YOU ARE HERE!"
"Took you long enough because the time is over. GG good luck next."
All Might would now usually ask his students to analyse the battle, but it had been so randomic he didn't know what to do.
"The next teams can start taking positions."
The rest of the battles had gone as expected: Katsumi blew up everything, Momo and Mineta made the bomb unreachable, Tsuyu touched the bomb without even moving, she saw it in a window on the first floor so she simply extended her tongue, Kirishima and kaminari were….bamboozled.
Meanwhile at the mall.
"Todoroki you can stop following me now, the exercise should have finished twenty minutes ago and we are at the mall." "I know but it would be wrong to leave a woman alone…" he said blushing
"Aren't you a gentleman?" the blushing deepened, he was almost as red as his hair "Would you mind escorting this lost lady during her shopping spree?"
Shoto's face lit up, he caught Mina by her hand as she was already running towards a shop, she turned around a bit confused "Would you mind doing a favour to the both of us by telling me which is the most expensive shop in here?" he asked, now she was even more puzzled, "Why?" he took a red credit card with an orange flame on it from his pocket and he simply said "Endeavour's paying today."
Said hero sneezed. Three hours later a message from the bank arrived on his phone, it said "300000 yen have been spent at Kashyyk Mall." he was confused.
When he got home he prepared the gym for the daily training with his son, said son rung the doorbell and Enji Todoroki looked at the display, it showed his son dressed in pink from the shoes to the baseball cap to the pink gold necklace, Enji opened the door and he laid on the couch, mentally destroyed.
"Hi dad, how was work?" said Shoto, entering the house.
"You know what Shoto? No training for today. I need to ask myself existential questions."
Shoto smiled, maybe some of his classmates weren't so bad.
Aaand cut.
A few things
-I don't want Mineta to remain the simple pervert, I will try to do some character development
-Endeavour won't be an abusive asshole, he will be just a parent stricter than usual
See you soon