Chapter Twenty Nine: We Belong by Pat Benatar

They went back home, and Jack snuck back into Rose's room. Jack sat down on Rose's bed while she put down her bags and took off her jacket. She sat down next to him and held her face only inches from his. "Hi," said Rose.

"Hi," said Jack. They shared a long, luxurious kiss. Rose leaned back on the bed, and Jack was on top of her, kissing her. Everything was going wonderfully until Rose gasped and ran to the bathroom.

Jack had no idea what happened. Did he hurt her? The last thing he wanted was to hurt Rose. He stood up and walked over to the bathroom door. "Rose?" He said calmly. "Are you okay?"

He didn't hear an answer. All he heard was muffled cries. "Rose, please talk to me," he said.

Finally, Rose opened the door. She walked over to the bed and pulled her knees up to her chest. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize," said Jack. "What happened?"

"I… I flashed back… to Cal," said Rose.

Jack held her hand. "Does that happen often?"

"It's never happened before," said Rose. "I just… don't know why it happened."

"Listen, it's okay," said Jack. "We don't have to do that again."

"I don't understand though," said Rose. "We've done that a thousand times. Plus, I just feel so silly. Nothing even happened with Cal!"

"It was still a mentally and physically traumatic experience," said Jack. "It doesn't matter how far he got."

Rose covered her face with her hands. "I just… I wish this never happened. I wish I wasn't damaged. I wish I could make out with my boyfriend without having a flashback."

"What can I do?" Jack asked.

Rose wiped away a tear. "Hold me." Jack nodded and wrapped his arms around her, holding her in his arms. "I want you. All of you. So badly. And it breaks my heart that I can't."

Jack stroked Rose's chin with her thumb, holding up her face. "Listen to me carefully." His voice was serious: stern but soft. "I could tell you it doesn't matter, but it does. It matters that you feel this way. It matters that this happened. And I know how strong you are, Rose. I know you'll be able to work through this. You've been through so much, and it's only made you stronger."

Rose looked up and kissed him. "Thank you."

"And one last thing," said Jack. "I love you… so much. The most. I love you more than anything. And nothing can change that."

"I love you too," Rose cried. She wiped her tears and looked at Jack. "It's just that part of me is like… why can't I just push through it?"

Jack shrugged. "Things happen for a reason. And… when we finally do this, it'll make it that much better."

•••

Rose was on the roof, talking to Janet on FaceTime. "I don't know what to do," she said. "I need your help."

"What's wrong?" Janet asked.

"Remember when I told you about Cal? In the library?" Rose asked.

"Sure," said Janet.

Rose sighed. "Well, Jack and I were kissing, and we got kind of… caught up in the kiss."

"Oh, so you finally did the deed?" Janet asked.

"Janet, I love you," Rose began, "but you're really not good at hearing my tone."

"Right, okay," said Janet. "So what happened?"

"I leaned back, and Jack moved on top of me, and all of a sudden… I flashed back," said Rose.

"Oh, Rose," said Janet. "I'm so sorry."

"What do I do?" Rose asked. "I love him so much, and I want to do it. I just… don't want to flash back anymore."

"I know," said Janet. "Just take it slow for now. What happened with that asshole only happened a few months ago." Janet looked at Rose and smiled. She sighed. "I'm really not good at the advice. But you know who is? Jack. Jack loves you more than anything. So just talk to him."

Rose nodded. "You're right."

•••

Rose went back into her room where Jack was waiting for her. "Hey," said Jack, giving her a quick kiss.

"Hey," said Rose. "Listen, I'm sorry about today."

"It's okay," said Jack.

She smiled as she sat down next to him. "I want to talk about this."

"Okay," said Jack.

"So I realized that it happened when you put your hand against my hip," said Rose. "Cal did it… that day." She looked down, and then back up at Jack. "Not that this is your fault. Because obviously it's not."

"I know," said Jack. He smiled kindly. "I don't have to do that anymore if that's a trigger spot for you."

"And I want to take it slow," said Rose.

"Absolutely," said Jack. "We can take it as slow as you want. And when we finally do this, we'll be ready. We'll make it special."

Rose smiled and kissed him lovingly. "Thank you," said Rose. "Are you sure this is what you want?"

"Listen, I could do this quickly with you right now," said Jack. "But that's not the way we should do this." He smiled and stroked her cheek. "You and I… we're special. We're going to do this in a special place with twenty candles, and romantic music, and not worried that Molly or Helga are going to walk in."

Rose smiled and kissed him again. "I love you."

She put her head on Jack's shoulder, and Jack kissed the top of her head. "Oh yeah? Well, screw you!" Helga yelled as she walked into the room and slammed the door.

"Helga, what happened?" Rose asked.

"We broke up," said Helga.

"I'm going to, uh, disappear for a while," said Jack. "Find me later."

"Okay," said Rose. He gave her a quick kiss before leaving. "Helga, talk to me."

Helga sat down on Rose's bed. "He said we weren't on the same wavelength," she said, with a shrug. "And I happen to agree, if that's the real reason."

"What do you mean?" Rose asked.

"We were in the same place we were in a year ago," said Helga. "He would call me for random hookups, and that's it."

"I'm sorry, Helga," said Rose. "It sounds like it was for the best."

Rose picked up her phone and texted Jack.

R: You need to talk to Fabrizio.

J: What about?

R: Helga says he was only in it for the hookups. That doesn't sound like Fabrizio.

J: No, it doesn't.

R: So you need to find out what's going on.

J: I don't do this whole… conspiracy theory thing.

R: Oh, come on. We love Helga and Fabrizio. And if masterminding the situation gets them back together, that's worth it.

J: Fine. I'll talk to you in a few.

R: Wait. Call me so I can listen.

J: You can't be serious.

R: Please. Please. Please.

J: Fine.

Jack called Rose, and he put his phone down and looked at Fabrizio. "So what happened with Helga?" Rose rolled her eyes. She expected him to be a bit more subtle.

"I broke up with her," said Fabrizio. "We were having issues, and we were fighting constantly. It just… wasn't working."

"You love her. I know you do," said Jack.

"Does it matter if it doesn't work out?" Fabrizio asked.

Jack thought for a minute. "I'm getting Rose. I don't know how to have a DMC."

"What's a DMC?" Fabrizio asked.

"Deep meaningful conversation," said Jack. His eyes widened. "Wow, Rose is really rubbing off on me." He walked over to the window, about to climb up the fire escape. "I'll be back."

"Well I don't want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with me," said Helga.

"Sorry. Rose, can I borrow you for a minute?" Jack asked.

"Are you going to be okay?" Rose asked Helga, and she nodded. She followed Jack up the fire escape. "What's going on?"

"I don't know how to have a DMC!" Jack exclaimed. "I need someone who can."

Rose laughed. "Okay."

They walked into Jack's room and started talking to Fabrizio. Rose was listening to his side of it.

"And so I broke up with her," said Fabrizio. He shrugged.

"So the reason you broke up with her… was real," said Rose.

Fabrizio frowned. "Yeah."

"Because Helga thinks that it was an excuse," said Rose.

"She does?" Fabrizio asked.

Rose nodded. "Your problem is… obvious."

"So what's the problem?" Fabrizio asked.

"You and Helga care so much about each other," Rose began. "But you don't talk to each other."

Jack was watching Rose handle the situation. She was so capable of everything. She always knew exactly what to do and say to people. He'd been sitting here with Fabrizio trying to do what Rose was able to do in five minutes.

"Listen, it's obvious you love Helga," said Rose. "And Helga loves you. But none of that matters if you can't talk to each other."

"Is that what you guys do?" Fabrizio asked.

Rose looked at Jack. She smiled and nodded. "And if Jack and I didn't talk to each other, we would probably still hate each other, and we certainly wouldn't be together."

"Okay," said Fabrizio.

Rose laughed under her breath. "Listen, here's what you're going to do. You're going to go to my bedroom, you're going to tell Helga that you want to give it another shot. That this time, you're going to do everything differently. And then just… use your own words."

Fabrizio nodded. "You better be right, Rose."

"I am," said Rose.

Fabrizio climbed out the window, and Rose climbed on Jack's lap and kissed him. "I love you so much."

"I love you too," said Jack. He looked at her… almost sadly.

"What's wrong?" Rose asked. Her arms were wrapped tightly around his neck.

"Do you know how much it hurts me that I was so cruel to you for so long?" Jack asked.

Rose saw a tear leave Jack's eye, and she wiped it away. "Listen, that was a long long time ago. You… you're the most amazing person in the entire world. You were there for me when no one else was."

"That's not true," said Jack. "Helga was there for you when no one else was."

"It's simple, Jack. It really is," said Rose. She stroked his hair and looked into his ocean blue eyes. "You did something wrong, you apologized, and you never did it again. And you've made me the happiest girl in the entire world."

She looked at him with complete adoration and love. She hugged him tightly. "And if that wasn't clear enough for you, then this should be," she began. She put her hands on his cheeks and looked at him. "I love you."

Jack held her in his arms and kissed her lovingly.