Notes: "Beware of the plot! It bites!" Bis. Also, new character, it seems. I don't know what I'm going to do with her.
She had found Loki in his old chambers. Odin had sealed that part of the palace so no-one would enter but Frigga had overriden that spell ages ago, curious to know more about Odin when she first came to be his wife. What she had discovered had been difficult to swallow. The pain that those halls and chambers hosted had been so strong that they held magic on their own. Odin never hid anything from her, but he didn't tell her outright about things unless she asked, so she had taken it on herself to investigate.
In doing so, she had discovered that there was a shadow prince, one that had been forcefully forgotten. Now she knew that it had not been planned from the start, but still it had made her quite angry with her husband that he had hid Loki for so long, that he had used so much enegry and resources into making it seem that Loki had never existed. Logically, she could understand that faking Loki's death or erasing him from existence and memory was the best way to protect him, but doing it at his back had just worked wonders. Maybe if Odin had swallowed his pride and talked with Loki instead of what he did.
"But can't you see it, Frigga? It was the best opportunity. In a thousand years time of Loki's disappearance the Jotnar would forget about him and if we aided them into suppressing the rebellion they would be indebted and we could control it from here. The war threat would be avoided and Loki, protected," he had tried to explain. "I couldn't have been able to plan it so good myself."
No. Frigga had not been able to see it. She had only seen cruelty. If Loki had been part of the plan, then she would have understood. But all that sharkcrap that Odin had done had backfired in the form of Loki cursing her son.
And thinking about Thor. He had left a pup and came back a man. In the rough year he had been away in the human world he had been shaped. He looked better, healthy and, for her utter surprise, in love. He had left thinking himself in love and had come back being in love. The receipt of such love had worried Frigga. Loki was older than Odin, as powerful or maybe more with his craft and resented them all after being ostracised and only sought as a witch. Frigga wouldn't be surprised if he decided to destroy the whole palace on a whim.
When she reached Loki's chamber she hesitated less than a second before knocking. She waited. For long moments, nothing happened but she had no intention of leaving. She knew Loki was inside and Loki knew who was outside. It was a battle of wills. In the end, Loki opened the door, just fractionally, and Frigga entered.
She had never entered these chambers before, though she had been tempted to do it so to see half of it in ruins and the other halp perfectly preserved was a shock. From the outside, the hole on the wall couldn't be seen. Was it a glamour? It must be.
Loki was on the preseverd part of the room, sitting on what Frigga supposed was his bed, hugging what looked like a cushion. It seemed to be enchanted to not rot underwater.
"What?" Loki snapped after the long silence.
"Did my son hurt you?" she said. No point in beating around the bush. He seemed surprised.
"What?" his voice was different now. More a question than aggression.
"I can add two and two together, Loki. And my son isn't a colsed book either."
Loki looked away, frowning. She had been with him before but she had never seen him so conflicted. He had been in control of most of his emotions and now... Now there was a fragility about him that worried her.
"He didn't... Force himself on me," he said, not looking at her.
Frigga inhaled deeply taking a deep breath and and filtering more water so she could think what to say next. She had feared Loki would want retribution. Forcing yourself on others was one of the worst crimes and that her son might have done it... She couldn't live with herself if she had brought up such kind of man.
"But I doubt you would have encouraged him either... It doesn't matter if you didn't stop him. If you didn't want to-"
"Oh! But I wanted," he cut her. Now he was looking at her, cruel smile in place. "I did enjoy every bit of it. Once his hands were touching me I encouraged him to keep going." Frigga knew he was taunting her, prompting her into action. "I seduced your pup, my Queen, and now he will do as I bid, not matter what others tell him about me," he said cocking his head slightly, sultry look in his eyes.
Well, if Loki continued like that she may as well hit him, right? After all, he was asking for it. Though she wouldn't really hit him. She still hadn't apologized for stabbing him before and she refused to hurt him again, to let him goad the worst of her out. If he wanted to be punished, the he would need to look somewhere else.
"If you, indeed, messed up with him and encouraged him, as you seem so bent to say, then you have forced yourself on him," she said, calmly. There was no reaction from Loki at first, but he lost his smile gradually and then looked away again. "Thor is not so young or naive as to be so easily led into coupling, Loki," she added after a fashion. Loki's face snapped back at her, surprise in his eyes. "He seems infatuated. Though I doubt he would have acted on his impulses if it was a recent discovery so tell me, what happened on land?"
Loki, Frigga saw, was breathing fast, taking small but continuous gulps of water and filtering them rapidly. He was nervous if the way he clutched the cushion to his chest was any indicator and she saw, surprised, how the most lovely blush crept up his face. He really was a sight to behold. Though now that she knew his personality she couldn't help but pity him: attractive people attracted all, not just good, but also bad, and what she knew of him just proved her point. It was no wonder he was slightly rotten on the inside, he was tired of other's people sharkcrap.
"I didn't realize that his attention had diverted from his human," he confessed with a small voice. It didn't suit him, she thought. "I kept trying to help him with his human, pushing both of them together, when all he could see was... I don't understand," he looked at her, pleading. "I'm sorry."
She shook her head. She was uncomfortable with the idea of her pup infatuated with a man so old, but both were consenting adults, and Loki kept saying that whatever had happened between them wasn't forced. She was worried, though. Maybe even if Loki had been forced, he would still say he wasn't. Out of a sense to protect? Who? Himself or Thor? Why was this mer so difficult to understand?
"How long have you know?"
"Three days ago he kissed me."
Oh! So he hadn't known until Thor had-
"Wait. Did Thor attack you?"
"No!"
They looked at each other. Loki seemed as confused as she felt. What was going on?
"So..."
"I have a human partner too," Loki said then, looking straight at her. That wasn't something she expected. "And I have been very affectionate with him... In front of Thor." She nodded, encouraging. "And he might have gotten a bit... jealous. A tad possessive, too. At first I saw only what I wanted to see: my nephew wanted to build skinship with me to make up for lost time. Heh! I'm an idiot."
Frigga sat down beside him.
"So you didn't know."
"No. And he must have suffered for it."
"Is that why you let him..."
"Ugh, no! I am not made of stone, sister, you made a damn fine specimen and one of my worst traits is that I take what I want. I am more worried about him not being able to see me as his uncle ever again. But I suppose he never saw me that way to begin with. Which makes me feel stupid because I saw him as my nephew and now... Now I have made a grave mistake."
So he had welcomed Thor's advances not out a sense of pity or self-sacrifice but because he was a horny dumbass. Noted. She slapped him even before she could stop herself. They looked at each other, surprised.
"I... I'm sorry..." she said, dumbfounded.
"No... I mean... I deserved that... I probably fucked up any possibility that Thor could let go of his little crush in a short period of time."
"So you don't intent on pursuing a relationship with Thor?" she asked.
Loki looked at her as if she had grown a second head.
"Why would I do that?"
She looked at Loki as if he had grown a second head.
"Why wouldn't you?"
"Uh?"
"My son is the Crown Prince. He will be King one day. You could be at his side and rule through him."
"I can do exactly that with just being his Crazy Uncle Loki, an advisor," Loki explained. "And I would have less duties and more freedom. I could leave the castle almost whenever I wanted and not get tied down by responsibilities."
"You don't want the crown?"
At that, Loki laughed then cackled. He was laughing so histerically he even hid his face in the cushion. Frigga didn't know what to do. She had not thought that Loki would be after the crown but she had had her suspicions. Now, seeing Loki she wasn't so sure he would ever want to sit on the throne. And his laughter wasn't only melodic –even if a bit breathless–, it was contagious. In seconds, the whole room was filled with both their laughters.
"Why would I want that? I have gone to extreme lengths to get away from the responsibility," he said once he managed to control himself. He was still laughing softly.
"I don't know... That's something everyone seems to want around here," she answered, laughing too.
"Well... They are stupid if they thing being the face of the kingdom is better than just a cog."
She agreed. Being a queen was exhausting. She had to be Queen Frigga all day long, even in her sleep.
00000
"A delegate from Jotunheim," Odin said, not looking away from the courier's face. The young mer was starting to feel nervous under the scrutiny.
"Yes, Your Highness."
"And they want to meet... When?"
"I wasn't told, Your Highness. I was told that the rest of the information was in the scroll."
Odin waved and the courier scurried away as fast as he could.
That had been fast. Too fast. He shouldn't have gotten distracted. Jotnar spies were as slippery as eel. Of course they saw Loki getting to Asgard. Maybe they even spotted him earlier than that. How long had they known? How many were still in the capital? He needed to thread carefully if he wanted to avoid unecessary confrontations.
Once upon a time he would have asked Loki to make the sacrifice. Now... He would rather cut his own hand than let them have his brother. Enough was enough. Even if Loki wasn't his brother, he was one of the most powerful seidrmasters in Asgard and relinquish him would put the whole kingdom at danger. He had no doubt that if Loki were to marry the next Jotnar monarch and they were to wage war against Asgard, he wouldn't rise a hand against his former homeland. But Odin prefered not to put that faith to test, lest the Jotnar have any way of manipulation.
A war would be disastrous.
Losing his brother again would be worse, a part of himself said.
Yes. The king in him would do what was best for his people, but the brother would do whatever in his hand to protect his family. He read the scroll with dread and breathed in relief after it. Jarnsaxa. The delegate was Jarnsaxa. That was... not bad. Not perfect, but could be far, far worse. At least, Jarnsaxa wasn't obsessed with Loki as most Jotnar had turned to be and if memory served him well she and Loki had been friends before... He issued a royal invitation for her to attend the feast at the high table that night.
Reclining in his seat he meditated about his life. His earliest memory was of two similar faces smiling at him. They had been so identical that he had been confused for a whole lot minute. Then there were blurry things but he remembered to always swim behind twin tails, fascinated by the complete synchronization between the two. As he grew older he started to see diferencies between his older brothers. Of course they seemed to be breathing at the same time and people even thought that their hearts beat at the same time and rhythm but Odin observed and saw. When Vili was brass Loki was calmer; when Loki played pranks, Vili minimised the outcome; when Vili would resort to his hands, Loki would lash out with words.
These diferencies didn't end with their personalities, their external appearance was also slightly different: the eye colour, even though was almost the same and from afar or after a quick glance would seem alike, was different. Their tails had complementary patterns that were mirror like, but Odin discovered that no-one had realized it. Oftentimes Odin could tell them appart just by looking at their navels. And as people were able to diferentiate him from Ve, he was able to tell apart who was who between the twins with a glance.
Once, Ve had approached him while he was studying the twins.
"You look at them all the time, Little Din," he had said. Odin just nodded, not taking his eyes away from his brothers.
"It's... He is a piece of art! He is beautiful, powerful, interesting... I bet that when they rule everyone will love him until he dies," Odin had said. Ve had looked at their brothers then.
"Who are you talking about? Loki or Vili?"
"I hate Loki," Odin had said, frowning. "He thinks he is so funny, but his pranks always make Vili look bad. And they share the blame all the time when it should only be Loki!"
Ve had looked at him in utter surprise.
"How can you say that, when they are exactly the same?"
"But they are not! They are completely different! Vili is kind and warm and Loki is cold and laughs at your face all the time."
Ve had then turned to look at their older brothers. Odin remembered that day quite well, since it was the day he realized his love for his brothers was different. He loved Vili as the perfect example of how a future king should be; he loved Ve as how an older brother should be; and he loved Loki in a twisted way, because he also hated Loki. In Vili and Ve, Odin never found fault, but in Loki everything was wrong. Even when he was smiling Odin felt rage, as if he was borrowing Vili's perfect smile and twisting it into something ugly. Then, he realized that Loki was the only one of his brothers who always played with him, who told him about his pranks in advance. Loki took him into adventures and helped with his seidr. Loki wasn't the perfect role model nor the perfect and composed older brother: Loki was just a normal mer who happened to have a crown over his head.
That was one of the reasons Odin hated Loki. Loki seemed to never take his duties seriously, but when it came to it, he was always on point and knew everything from everyone. And still, he could lose his composure, he swore and flirted and drank like a human sailor in a tabern and he didn't take serously when people offered to marry him: he was just living as if nothing, while doing everything. In comparison Vili and Ve looked like automats, dead inside, without hearts. Odin hated that. Odin hated that Loki shone so brightly that his brothers lost all their shine, even when they had their own right to shimmer as brightly!
Rubbing his face, Odin let the past in the past. Nothing good would come from him thinking about such things now. There was a difficult political situation ahead of himself and he just hoped Loki would act accord his station instead of the free spirit he used to portray wherever he went.
00000
Loki looked splendid. He had hung about himself small, golden chains in ways that highlighted his loveliness but also pointed out the many scars marring his skin. He had a few new ones. Scars won after the war, it would seem. The most recent one seemed to be the one at his abdomen: a dagger? Maybe a sweord. On the left side of his tail there was what seemed to be a chunk of meat missing. The skin was scarred horribly and only a handful of scales were growing back, too small and listless to compare to the rest of Loki's breathtaking tail.
Of course, instead of taking away from him, those scars only added to Loki. It was a declaration that whatever had happened to him, it had been worse for his foes. As if saying that Loki could not be killed and that he was dangerous and deathly. Jarnsaxa examined the prince and found out that now, Loki looked like an adult instead of a young mer trying to look mature. She knew that this new version of Loki would stir trouble in Jotunheim.
She also knew that Thrym had been an idiot for starting a war against Bor and his sons. Of course, no-on would believe that Thrym had seen Loki when he was but a pup and followed him to the surface. Thrym, the idiot, had fallen prey of his own desires and had sent a petition to Bor: he wanted to wed Loki. Bor had refused, as Loki was still too young and he and Vili were almost all the time together. Separating twins at such young age was known to bring misfortune.
But Thrym did not surrender. A couple of decades later he tried to abduct the prince, taking instead his twin. Of course, Thrym didn't mind much which one of the twins he got, as long as he had Loki's face. Though the kidnappers never reached Jotunheim with the prized cargo, for Loki had charged against them with a fury only know in tales of old. He had fought almost twenty mer to get his brother back and when Vili managed to release himself from their hold, both princes showed why they were to be feared. There were not even one hair nor scale left of the kidnappers.
Vili had claimed then that if anyone tried to touch his little brother Loki, he would be the one seeing to the matter personally. People in Asgard rejoyced then, since the Crown Prince and his twin were to be the most powerful couple of siblings ever seen. After that, Loki's powers were known through the Seven Seas. And Thrym, the fool, decided that that was just a signal from the gods of old telling him that Loki was his intended: beautiful, powerful, deathly. His obsession grew bigger as the centuries went by and he sent his spies to gather intel about the younger twin. Apparently, the youngest son of Bor was able to tell the twins appart as easily as breathing. How he did it was kept a mystery for everyone.
Thrym, then, had waged war against Asgard in the hopes that Loki and Vili would be sent to the battlefield. The disappearance of warriors in such circumstances was not uncommon so if Loki were to disappear while in combat... Jarnsaxa never like that, so she tried to monitor the twin princes and thwart any intent of abduction. She managed to do it fairly well, until the rumour that a spell had been created that could siphon Loki's powers out and use them agaisnt the Aesir.
That had been the factor that killed the older son of Bor. Shortly after, the war was won by Asgard as a sudden spike in berserkr warriors made it impossible for the Jotnar to fight them.
Still, Jarnsaxa was completely sure that no one outside Thrym's closest circle knew why the war had started. Everyone else believed it to be just a rebellion against the Asgardian yoke. And luckily for Thrym, all his confidants, the ones who knew, were dead. Well, not luckily. He had hunted them all and killed them but Jarnsaxa knew and she wasn't dead. That meant that Thrym never knew that she knew.
Looking back at the prince she couldn't help but remember that time he had gone to the court at Utgard. It had been a diplomatic party and Loki had shone like a pearl under the sun, but she knew that he had just gone to see if he could kill Thrym himself. How did she know? Loki had confessed it himself. And he had told her that he would avenge his brother. She had been afraid of the prince, then. His eyes were unfocused and his smile terse, there was a gleam to his skin and scales that spoke of illness of the mind.
"I am going to gut him... And I am going to drag him down to where the abisal terrors thrive and let them eat him alive. And I will witness it with glee... He took my everything from me..."
And then, he had crumbled down. Jarnsaxa had taken him to his chambers and had let the strange mer cry on her shoulder feeling awkward. After that, Loki seemed completely different towards her and that riled up severan of the other Jotnar. He had been polite, and if a friendly enough, never close enough to the rest of the court for rumours to rise but then Loki had become closer to Jarnsaxa and he seemed genuinely relaxed with her, which in turn made the rest of the Jotnar court become colder. Though that was short lived because since she was spotted talking with the prince, the king bestowed over her favours and had her at his side whenever he could. In the end, Loki never tried to assassinate anyone and went back. It seemed that the king had forgotten everything about the prince and there were preparations for the party that would be going to Asgard next but then...
Then the idiot king tried to kidnap Loki once again. And Jarnsaxa found herself once again in the middle of it all. Thrym took her and several others, marched into Asgard and demanded his cousin and his "friends" to be released from what seemed to be a group kidnapping. And then he demanded Loki. Jarnsaxa, while in Asgard, made plans to disappear for ever, she wouldn't mind looking for a place to live in Niflheim and the night she was to scrurry away to never be seen she found king Thrym cornering the very object of his desires.
"You have bewitched me! You have to take responsibility," he was saying as he grabbed one of Loki's arms.
"I have done not such a thing, king Thrym. If you would be as kind as to release me I won't treat this as an insult and seek retribution myself," Loki spat back, snarling. The water grew colder around them and Jarnsaxa shivered.
"I have spoken with your father and brother."
"Good for you, Your Majesty," Loki said, shaking the other mer. Jarnsaxa could see that the prince had used seidr to make her king release him.
"Loki, can't you see it? We are made for each other! Ours is truly a tragic love. You, who were to be king of Asgard, and me, the one who is king of Jotunheim. Our kingdoms were enemies in the past, but now there will be peace between both of our people and we can finally be together. Do not worry, my love, I will convince your father and brother. We will be together soon," then he had tried to force Loki in a kiss that the younger mer evaded as best as he could, receiving it on his cheek instead.
Long after the king had gone Jarnsaxa was still huddled, in shock.
"You can come out now, Saxa."
Startled by the voice she had come out. Loki looked angry.
"Are... are you all right?"
"No. But I will be... If that fool think we are a match made "in heaven" as the humans say then I can manipulate him and turn this to my advantage."
"You won't destroy Jotunheim, right?" she had asked, scared by the look on the prince's face.
"No. I only require the blood of a few... And as far as I know about your homesea, not many will miss them."
And then, Jarnsaxa had been burdened with even more secrets. Loki had been spying and gathering intel about the kingdom and no body had known. At that time Jarnsaxa feared for her own head, but Loki had assured her that he would never hurt his friends and that he would always think of her as one.
To this day, she still wondered why she bothered. She would have been a happier mer if she had never involved herself in the royals' affairs. If she simply had ignored the gutwrenching feeling she got the first time she discovered her king stalking a pup from another country. She was the carrier of so many secrets that she was sure her life was in constant danger.
She let her gaze roam around the Royal Table and fixed it on the new Crown Prince. She had heard about him before, but since Jotunheim was thrown into chaos after Thrym's disappearance –to the outside they told that he had been killed, but no body was found– she had not been to Asgard so this was the first time she saw the pup. It was clear the pup was pup no more: handsome, strong broad shoulders and thin waist, elastic red tail that seemed to be peppered with gold all over it. He was smiling while speaking with his royal mother and threw his uncle glances from time to time.
It was clear that this was the first time Loki sat with the Royal Family in such an even since he had been declared missing or dead and now she wondered if those news were only told in Jotunheim. She wouldn't put it past Odin selling them fake news to forget about his older brother. Her eyes found the Crown Prince again. He was such a fine mer she wondered why he wasn't wed already. She swept the hall and saw that quite a lot of young mer, and some older too, were staring at the prince entranced by him, ignoring Loki completely. Heh! It seemed that the handsome prince had now a competitor about who was the "fairest of them all" as humans liked to say.
Jarnsaxa went back to her meal and after a few bites she felt eyes staring at her. Her head snapped up and she looked directly at Loki. He was the one looking. As soon as their eyes met he put on his most charming smile and the worst part of it was that he was genuinely smiling at her. She couldn't help but reciprocate with a coquetish one of her own. His smile crooked slightly, then and he winked at her.
She smothered a giggle by bitting her lower lip and he answered putting his tongue between his teeth and sticking it to his upper lip. She then stuck out her tongue, wrinkling her nose and he huffed, looking away as if trying to hide his chuckle, but that was just for show, he wasn't hiding anything.
Jarnsaxa, satisfied, looked around her in the table, paying attention to the conversation once again until she felt another kind of stare. This time, she found the Crown Prince looking at her with a blank stare, eyes colder than the Artic. Huh? Wasn't this prince supposed to be like underwater sunshine?
More Notes: Okay, sorry for the delay. Off-line life got in the way of writing. :)