A/N: Sorry it's been so long since I posted! I've been trying to take more "me time". I've been reading and spring cleaning and then I had some real life family things pop up, but I'm back now. I still may not be posting daily like I was before but hopefully I can manage once a week!

Hope you guys are still enjoying this! Happy reading!

angellwings

PS - katertots helped SO VERY MUCH with the Matt and Sylvie scene in the middle of this chapter! She elevated and smoothed it out for me in a way I never would have on my own. THANK YOU KATERTOTS. You are truly the BEST.

"People like us, we've gotta stick together,

Keep your head up, nothing lasts forever,

Here's to the damned, to the lost and forgotten,

It's hard to get high when you're living on the bottom."

-"People Like Us" by Kelly Clarkson

Gus called. Matt's phone rang while he was packing up his tools. They were finished with unpacking and had decided to head to Molly's for a drink, but first Sylvie thought she'd better deal with this.

Matt handed her the phone with a knowing worried glance. She tried to give him a reassuring one in return but she's not sure if she succeeded.

"Your boy's gonna get his meeting. Have him show up at the lock up. The lunkhead you operated on will see him in the jail infirmary first thing tomorrow morning."

"I'll let him know. Thanks."

"We're even now. Just so we're clear."

"We are."

"If pretty boy messes this up or doesn't show that's not on me."

"Agreed," she replies. "We're done."

"Good."

He doesn't wait for her to acknowledge him or say goodbye. The line simply goes dead. She hands Matt back his phone.

"Do you think Mills will be at Molly's tonight?" She asks him.

"Probably," Casey answers.

"I still haven't gotten a new phone and I need to talk to him. And I'd rather talk in person," she says before worrying her bottom lip.

"If he doesn't show up by eight then I'll call him for you," Matt agrees.

"Thank you, Casey," she says as she places a hand on his arm and squeezes gently.

Once they get to Molly's, Brett finds Kidd sitting alone in the back. She grabs Shay and they both make their way to her.

"Hey," Sylvie says as she sits in the chair across from her. "Everything okay?"

Stella shakes her head and then turns to Shay. "Hey! Glad you're back! Everything good with your family?"

"Oh yeah, everybody's great," she tells her. "I'm a little more worried about you right now. What's going on?"

She huffs and rolls her eyes. "What's going on is that my husband blew all the money I earned and that he never contributes to on a fucking sound board for his new in-home recording booth. And then went ballistic when I asked him to return it."

She drops her phone onto the table and slides it over to them with her text messages up and open. Brett's eyes widen at the language and threats contained in those messages followed by a lengthy and supposedly remorseful apology.

"We have no money to buy groceries or gas with now. Thank God I pay our bills pretty far in advance or else our power and water wouldn't have been paid on time. What's worse is that this isn't the first time he's done this and I'm usually the one working my ass off to either get extensions or make extra money. Not him. I can't do this anymore. I went to the bank and closed that account today. I opened a new one and I will not be putting him on it. I haven't told him that yet and I honestly don't want to find out what he says when I do."

Shay looks angrier and angrier as she scrolls back through Stella and Grant's texts. "Stella. Holy shit. He talks to you like this all the time."

"Not all the time," she says defensively. "Just...when we fight. He's harmless, really."

Shay angled the screen toward Brett to let her see a particularly nasty message that contained a strong threat. "Oh hell, no," Brett exclaims while glaring at the phone. "You're coming home with me tonight. I've got an extra bedroom. You're taking it — for however long you want."

The door opens behind her and she hears Herrmann yell a name across the bar. Mills is here. Sylvie turns her head to look at him and finds him staring right back at her. She excuses herself from Shay and Kidd to talk to him.

"Hey," she says hesitantly.

"Hi," he replies, nervously clearing his throat.

"The guy you saved? Vic the goon?" She waits for Peter to nod before continuing. "He'll see you first thing in the morning in the jail infirmary."

He jerks back slightly with a surprised wide eyed stare. "Yeah, okay, I'll be there. How...how the hell did you manage that?"

"Really don't worry about it," she replies.

Awkward silence fills the space between them and Sylvie gulps nervously, looking anywhere but at him, as she finally speaks again.

"I should get back to my table. Stella's having a crisis," Sylvie explains lamely.

"Oh," he replies, sounding clearly disappointed. "Sure, yeah, I'll call you tomorrow after I meet with Victor."

"Okay, thanks. I'd appreciate that."

She should stay and talk longer — make a real effort — but she can't. After what she did she's surprised he's still acknowledging her at all. She asked him to let someone die. She's a first responder! Her job is to save lives not end them. She doesn't want to know if his opinion of her has changed. If they don't talk then she never has to find out.

"I'll, um, see you later," she mutters before quickly walking away from.

She knew dating a nice guy was too good to be true. After what she almost did, there's no way a man like Peter Mills would still want her.

There's something off between Sylvie and Mills. Matt noticed it last night at Molly's and the day before that outside of the district. He doesn't know everything that happened while they were missing. He's not sure he wants to know all the details, but whatever happened has made them both hesitant with each other and ashamed of themselves. He can see it.

They're eight hours into the next shift. He's in his quarters with the door open and Sylvie is sitting on her cot. She's just gotten off the phone with the counselor Boden recommended. He overheard her making an appointment for tomorrow. He's glad she isn't fighting it like he did. Meeting with Orlovsky twice a week has done wonders for him.

Her phone rings and she winces at the caller ID before pressing the decline button. He watches her chew on her bottom lip, looking anxious and guilty, until he just can't take it anymore.

He leaves his quarters and clears his throat as he reaches the foot of her bed. As he hoped, it alerts her to his presence and keeps her from being startled. She looks up at him and then down at her phone and releases a heavy sigh.

"How awful of a person am I for dodging Pete's calls?" She asks him as a deep furrow forms between her brows.

"Dodging someone's calls doesn't make you awful, Sylvie. Though, it does beg the question...why are you dodging his calls?"

"I don't want to know if—or rather how—his opinion of me has changed. I did something awful while we were working on that Victor guy," she admits softly. "Or wanted to anyway. And I would rather not know that I've lost him before we've even had a chance to get started."

"I doubt you've lost Mills, Brett."

Sylvie stares down at her lap. "You don't know what I did, Casey." Guilt hangs in the air around her.

"Then tell me."

"No," she says, shaking her head, voice pitching higher. "I already might've lost Mills because of it, I'm not going to risk that you'll hate me, too."

Matt frowns, brows drawn together. "I can promise you that won't happen," he assures her. "You've been there for me when I've hit some pretty spectacular lows. Let me be there for you, too." He takes an anxious breath and tries again. "What happened?"

"We basically did surgery on the guy's neck to try and slow the internal bleeding. At one point his carotid artery was exposed." She glances around as though to ensure their privacy. "I—" she begins, lowering her voice. He sees water pooling in her eyes. "I told Mills to clamp it and let him die," she finishes in a rush. "They weren't going to let us go, and I thought that might be our only way out. But I was wrong. The thought never should have occurred to me. I'm a first responder! I'm supposed to save people's lives. How could I forget that?"

"Mills obviously didn't do it," Casey says observantly.

"He held the clamp out to me and gave me the opportunity, but—I couldn't do it either."

"Then it sounds to me like you didn't forget, Sylvie. You had the chance to kill that man but you didn't," he reminds her. "You chose not to. Which is amazing considering the fact that your life was in danger. Some people in your position wouldn't have had any issue with letting that man die, but you did. Do you know how brave that is? Of course, you wanted to kill him. You wanted to live. But choosing the higher path even if it might have cost you your life? That's badass, Brett. Mills knows that just like I do. I think you're worrying over nothing."

She looks up at Matt with tear-filled eyes and shakes her head. "What if you're wrong?"

"If I'm wrong then Mills isn't worth your time, but I don't think I'm wrong," Matt answers honestly. "Talk to him. Talk to him the way you just talked to me. He'll understand."

She nods thoughtfully and stares down at the phone in her hands. "I should call him back."

He stands to leave and give her some privacy just as the bells go off.

She groans and rolls her eyes. "Impeccable timing as always."

It was a fire at a storage unit facility. Ambo didn't end up being needed. Though, that seemed to be a miracle. Apparently, the unit that caught fire was a goldmine of elements required to commit arson. Once the fire was out, she and Shay packed up and headed back to the house so the guys could get to work on overhaul.

After they backed in, Sylvie could make out a lone figure waiting for them in her driver's side mirror. She recognized the build and the stance, even from a distance.

Peter Mills.

It seems he didn't plan to let her ignore him any longer.

Shay gives her an encouraging look and waves to Mills before she heads into the house, intentionally leaving them alone.

"I tried to call you to give you an update on Victor," he says as they walk toward each other.

"I know. I'm sorry. I was about to call you back when we got a call," she replies apologetically. "What happened?"

"He didn't talk to me this morning, but after I left he rolled on Lullo. They arrested him a half hour ago," Mills informs her.

"Good," Sylvie says as she releases a relieved breath.

"How did you do it?" Mills asks. "How did you make it happen?"

"Me?" She asks in return. "All I did was get you in the door. The rest was all you, Peter Mills."

He's quiet for a long moment as his eyes scan every inch of her face. He steps closer and adjusts his radio. When he looks beyond her to the driveway, she looks with him and notices the rig from 105 and his partner waiting patiently. Why didn't she notice that before?

"I get that this isn't the time or the place," Peter says, meeting her eyes. "But we need to talk. I want to make sure we're okay, you and me."

"We are," Sylvie promises.

"You say that," he replies with a worried expression. "But I'd still like to talk. I want to be sure, Sylvie. Can I take you out for breakfast after shift?"

She shoves her hair out of her face, more out of nerves than necessity, and nods.

"I'll pick you up here," he declares. "We'll go wherever you want."

"Okay," she answers softly. "We can do that."

"Thank you," he says with a grateful expression. "I'll see you in the morning."

He walks away toward his partner and his own ambulance. In the morning they'll talk and she'll know for sure whether or not Casey is right. She hopes he is, but she hasn't had the best luck lately and she's beginning to doubt. Plus, she really likes Mills and she would hate for things to end now before they find out where this particular road might take them. She's never done well with unanswered questions and she doesn't want Mills to end up unanswered.