Heyyyyyyy. Hey. Hello.
To say life has been a mess these past few weeks is an understatement. Who would have thought a worldwide pandemic would stomp my creativity like it did! But, here we are. Sort of back in the thick of it.
I'm so grateful to have found a small place in this little fanfiction world and I'm even more grateful to have so many wonderful people along for the ride. Thank *you* for every ounce of support - every visit, view, favourite and follow means so much to me. And all the feedback y'all gave me on the last chapter! Your reviews mean so so so much to me. Sorry to gush, it just makes all the difference.
So thank you especially to Purplestan, Rachem, Gingerandspice1, islanddreamer17, and ellidraco1014. I was so so nervous about the last chapter but y'all blew me away. So thank you for the support and interest in my story! And B, girl. My biggest cheerleader! This one is for you. Who would Mack even be without you in her corner!?
Also, it you're looking for a treat: check out Oasis performing Champagne Supernova live at Earls Court 1995 on YouTube. It's one of the best live performances ever? Sort of related to this chapter lol
Anyway, let's dive in! I promise this one is a less dramatic and much fluffier.
When Mackenzie woke up Saturday morning, soft and warm, curled up into Nate's side, she felt at home. She remembered, vaguely, drifting in and out of her dream state all night, chest heaving with memory of a gunshot. There was never a moment where she felt alone, though. It was as if Nate's sleep was tethered to hers and the moment she was awake, so was he.
He rubbed circles on her back until she fell asleep. He kissed her forehead, gently, every time she stirred. It was as if her sleep, her well being, was more important than anything else in those moments.
"Morning," Nate's voice sounded out above Mackenzie. She flicked her eyes upward to look at him. "Did you sleep okay?"
She nodded and closed her eyes again, sighing into his chest. "I assume you didn't. You usually roll me away from you in the middle of the night."
"I couldn't let you go this time," Nate replied with a laugh, tracing his fingers along her shoulders. "I slept well enough."
"What are the chances we can just stay right here all day?" Mackenzie asked, extending her leg over his.
"There's a high probability we can make that work," he said with a smile. "I feel like we have to make up for the last few weeks."
Mackenzie nodded in agreement, tightening her hold on his torso. The last few weeks ramping up to the night before seemed like a dream. But, she knew it was all very real. The fading red marks on her wrist and her swollen crying face was reminder enough. They remained in Nate's bed for a bit longer, wrapped in each other. This was really all Mackenzie needed. Although she knew the real world was waiting for them.
It wasn't long before Nate's phone started to buzz and break them away from the idea of being alone together for the day. As much as Mackenzie wanted him to just turn his phone off and stay in bed with her, she knew he likely had things to deal with. He pressed a kiss against her forehead as he grabbed his phone and slinked off the bed.
She sighed and rolled over onto her back, stretching out her arms and legs. Just as Nate exited the room, a quiet mewl sounded at the end of the bed as Max joined her. As if he was keeping her company while Nate was in the other room. Mackenzie couldn't help but smile at the little creature as he cozied up beside her. She decided for the time being reveling in the little quiet moments was a welcome distraction from the real world.
Nate felt a strange sense of guilt leaving Mackenzie alone, even in his own apartment. They were perfectly safe, she was calm and rested in his bed. Yet he was having a difficult time being apart from her. He shook his head and dropped down onto the living room couch, scanning through all the notifications on his phone. He breezed past a multitude of emails about how wonderful the party had been the night before, a few thank you messages from the team at The Common Pantry, and a missed call from his mother. One text that raised his eyebrows was from Chuck: 'she somehow made bail. call me.'
Nate swore under his breath and did just that.
"Chuck, hey," Nate started as Chuck answered his call. He leaned back onto the couch. "What's going on?" Nate had given his contact info to the arresting officers but knew Chuck had his ear to the ground and a few other contacts in the NYPD where he got quick information from.
"Someone paid Maya Peron's bail this morning. They wouldn't tell me who but she's not allowed to leave the state."
"Great," Nate muttered out.
"If you call the precinct, they'll expedite a restraining order." Chuck paused. "Did you get any sleep?"
"Mack slept," Nate replied. "That's more important."
"Well, if I were in your shoes Nathaniel, I'd be calling in my favours with whatever judge your grandfather has up his sleeve to get this all dealt with quickly. Depending on how she pleads, this could all come to a halt. They can likely get the paperwork to you today for the restraining order, at least."
"Thanks Chuck. Really. Without your help, I may -
"No need for the speech, Nate. I know. Keep me updated on what's going on."
Next, Nate called Dan to let him know what had happened at the loft the night before. It wasn't an easy conversation but Nate reassured him that Mackenzie was okay.
"It's just a mess, man," Nate concluded, hearing Dan sigh on the other end. "But it's over, at least."
"I should probably call my dad," Dan replied quietly. "I'm sure Mack won't want that but…"
Nate nodded. "Actually, do you mind if I tell Rufus? I wanted to talk to him about a few things anyway."
"Go for it," Dan replied. "He'd probably appreciate hearing from you. I'll call Jen."
As their call ended, Nate paused. He always had a comfortable relationship with Rufus, save from being kicked out of the Humphrey loft in high school. Although his opinion of the man had really changed in the last few years, he knew reaching out was the right thing to do. It would still be too early to call the west coast, so it was going to have to wait. Nate wrapped up all his phone activities, sending a message to Leo about a meeting on Monday then moved to order some breakfast for himself and Mack.
Then, he would keep his phone at bay for the rest of their Sunday.
He dreaded having to talk to Mackenzie about what happened, about how she was feeling. It crushed him to know she had to go through that entire experience - to feel the broken trust, the fear, the uncertainty. The fact that another psycho with a gun was in her life at all. It wasn't lost on him the parallels that had followed her through life thus far. He wondered if he could just sweep her away for the rest of the month, convince her to try and work remotely from a warm beach in the south. It would mean missing all the holiday plans their families were lining up but if she liked the idea, he would commit. It didn't matter as long as they were together.
By the time he returned to the bedroom, he could hear the shower running in his en-suite. Suddenly, just the act of Mackenzie being in his shower but Nate's mind at ease again. She was okay, she was safe, she was there. Right there.
The past few weeks of tension and fighting and worry and distance didn't need to occupy space in his mind anymore. He smiled to himself as he walked into the steamy bathroom, seeing the outline of Mackenzie's figure through the fogged up glass. Soon enough, this could be every morning they shared together. In fact, if it was up to Nate, Mackenzie was officially moved in now. Even if most of her things were still at the loft, he wasn't going to let her sleep there anymore.
This was his future. Their future.
The heavy scent of her rose water shampoo filled the room and Nate was so lost in thought, caught in his daydream, that he didn't even hear the shower turn off.
"Pass me a towel, please?" Mackenzie's voice broke through his ears as she stuck her head outside of the shower door. Nate turned his head to meet her gaze and he couldn't help but smile. It was nice to see her calm, collected. Relaxed. He gave her a quick nod and grabbed a towel from the open cupboard near the door, taking a few steps towards the shower to meet her with it held open.
She laughed and let him wrap it around her frame tightly, then locking his arms around her in a hug, too.
"I missed you," he spoke quietly into her ear, letting her lean into his chest. "I'm formally requesting never being apart again."
Mackenzie laughed into his shoulder, pulling her head back. "You say that now, but once I'm really moved in you might change your mind. Suddenly my cute quirks may become annoying habits, you know."
"I mean, I already find your hair in the shower and I've never complained," Nate replied with a laugh, squeezing her hips. "And I've noticed you sometimes drool when you're sleeping and-
"Hey now, I didn't ask for a list," Mackenzie tried to pull back from his grip, a fake pout on her lips. "Mean."
"I love every single annoying quirk and habit you have, Mack." Nate's right hand left her hip and came up to cradle the side of her face, which was still dripping wet.
"Yet he still describes me as annoying," she said in return, raising an eyebrow. "Good thing you're so handsome, Archibald."
Nate tilted his head back to laugh for a moment then leaned in to kiss her. It was soft, at first. He reveled in the feeling, trying to engrave these simple moments into his mind. These were the things he took for granted before whether or not he realized it.
Especially when Mackenzie was on the other side of the globe. He knew he had lost two years with her already - that was two years without stolen glances and soft kisses and sparkling laughter. And to have witnessed that put at risk last night, by an erratic young woman and a stolen handgun, he felt he had to immediately make up for last time.
"Are you making us breakfast?" Mackenzie asked as he pulled away.
"It'll be here in about half an hour," Nate replied. "Pastries and fruit from Betty's."
Mackenzie smiled and tried to wiggle away from his hands. "Sounds great. Now, let me get dressed."
A shy smirk grew across Nate's face. "Or..I will get undressed." He wasn't sure if sex would be on the table considering the mess of emotions Mackenzie had gone through in the last 24 hours. But his body couldn't lie. Just gazing at her through the shower had gotten him excited.
They had to make up for lost time.
Mackenzie hesitated for just a brief moment then moved her hands, which had been gripping her towel close. The soft fabric fell from her torso and she pressed herself up against Nate, meeting his lips with an aggressive fervour.
Time and time again, Mackenzie was blown away by Nate. Perhaps it was a case of 'absence makes the heart grow fonder' but the way he looked at her with such adoration made her feel like floating. And the way his mouth consumed her? Well, that was a whole other feeling. Soon enough, Nate was pulling her into him, dragging her to follow his footsteps back to his room. Their lips stayed locked, only breaking for a breath as Nate's knees hit the back of his bed.
He spun them around quickly, gently pushing Mackenzie back onto the sheets. She shuffled up the bed quickly, propping herself up on her elbows as she watched him shake out of his sweatpants. A throaty whimper left her mouth as he joined her on the bed, now just as naked as she was. His whole body felt so warm as he rested on top of her, hands exploring her body as he lips kissed along her jaw. She leaned her head to the right, exposing her neck to him. A barely audible moan escaped him as he left sloppy kisses along her neck. He bit on her earlobe, smiling as she whimpered his name.
Nate propped himself up on his left hand as his mouth continued to ravage her neck and chest. Meanwhile his right hand traced down her body, teasing and pulling and pinching as he went along. Mackenzie's breath hitched as he pushed her legs apart, letting his fingers take lazy strides across her thighs.
"Nate?" Mackenzie stuttered out his name, gripping her hands behind his neck.
"Yes, love?" His right hand slowed down, tracing circles above her most sensitive area.
"Touch me, please."
Nate just smirked and did as she requested. His fingers moved like he was conducting a beautiful symphony, moving his lips down her body. Soon enough, her legs were over his shoulders.
Mackenzie would always appreciate how in tune with her body Nate was. And how generous he was, too.
God, she was grateful for Nate Archibald.
He brought her to the edge soon enough, laughing at his success as she quivered underneath him. He sat up and gazed down at her catching her breath. A soft smirk grew on his face.
Mackenzie opened her eyes and looked up at him. "You know I hate when you stare."
"Can't help it," Nate replied with a shrug, crawling down to lean on top of her again. "I think you're really nice to look at. Especially when you come undone."
His hands planted on either side of her head and he leaned down to kiss her lips. Her hands grabbed at his hips and she tried to pull him as close as possible.
She bit at his lips. "Fuck me, please."
—
Nate practically forced Mackenzie to just sit and relax on the couch for the afternoon. She insisted she wanted to get her laptop and do some things for work but he wouldn't let her even contemplate such a thing.
She conceded, eventually. She put on a few of her old favourite movies and by the end of the afternoon, was napping peacefully under a cashmere blanket. Max rested on the couch above her, as if keeping watch.
Nate took the opportunity to finally call Rufus. He tore his eyes off of Mackenzie on the couch and took a few steps down the hall, slipping into his second room. He sat down on the bed and brought his phone up to his ear.
"Hello?"
Nate glanced at his watch, it was just after 1 on the west coast. "Hey Rufus, it's Nate. Archibald."
Rufus laughed on his end. "I do have you programmed into my phone, Nate. How are you?"
Nate let out a breath. "I'm fine, thanks." He didn't intend to skip past the pleasantries but there was a real purpose to his call. "I'm calling about Mackenzie."
He heard Rufus sigh. "Nate, it's really kind of you to try and mediate what's going on here but -
"No, no. It's not about that." Nate paused. "Something happened at the loft last night with that Maya girl."
There was a heavy pause.
"What happened? Is Mackenzie okay?"
"She's fine today, surprisingly. I wasn't really sure how she'd react after everything." Nate took his time and explained what had happened over the last while with Maya and the details of what happened at the loft. When he was done, he could just hear Rufus' steady breathing on the other end of the line.
"Rufus? Are you there?"
"God, I've been a terrible father."
"Uhm.."
"Sorry, that's not what.." Rufus paused. "Thank you for calling me yourself, Nate. It means a lot. And thank you for taking care of my daughter. You've always been there for her and that means a lot to me."
"Of course. She's everything to me."
"I'm flying home next week. I think it's time for her and I to fix this. Or at least try again.
An apprehensive smile crossed Nate's face. "I just want to be clear. I'm on Mack's team here, Rufus. If she decides she doesn't want to..talk, you can't make her. You know as well as I do how stubborn she can be."
"I know, I know." Rufus let out a heavy sigh. "I'll see you next week, I hope. Thank you again, Nate. You're a good kid." Nate rolled his eyes. "A good man."
Nate felt an incredible sense of relief when their phone call ended. He knew it wasn't his job to repair what was going on with Mackenzie and her dad. But the least he could do now is encourage her to try. She didn't often say it out loud, but he knew she was hurting about this situation with her dad still. Perhaps they would never have a normal relationship, but an opportunity for forgiveness was possible. Maybe some repair.
He had to encourage her to try.
"Yes, Jen, honestly. I'm fine. I have an appointment with Simone this Friday but seriously, between you and Nate constantly checking in, I'm going to lose it."
Mackenzie went to the office Monday morning, despite Nate's protests that she could just take a day off or work from his apartment. Truthfully, she didn't want to lose the routine and normal feeling in her life because of what happened. Yes, she would admit her anxiety was definitely heightened after what had happened. And it peaked even more when someone delivered paperwork to Nate's for her late Sunday night to expedite a restraining order.
Those things were certainly not being kept at bay.
But continuing to work, especially with their busiest season wrapping up, kept her mind busy and that's all she wanted.
"Will you still help me figure out a Christmas gift for Nate?" Mackenzie sighed into the phone to Jenny. "After work tomorrow maybe?"
Their phone call ended not long after and Mackenzie looked at the clock on her desktop. It was well past lunchtime and she was starving. She bundled up in her long peacoat and headed down the street to grab something to eat. When she stepped outside, she noticed a black town car sitting outside the office building. It wasn't uncommon to see that type of vehicle in the financial district but she had a funny feeling. The moment she crossed in front of the car, the door opened and Nate's driver John stepped out.
"Miss Humphrey," he said, tipping his head. "Where are you headed?"
"Hi John," Mackenzie replied with a smile. "Just gonna walk up to Sweet Green for a salad."
"Mr. Archibald requested I be available for wherever you need to travel," he replied, motioning to the car.
"Well, that's nice but I'm just going to walk. I mean, you get paid either way, right?"
John smiled. "Of course, Miss."
"Then, I suppose you can take me to my meeting at Bass Industries later but for the time being, I could use the fresh air."
As she was waiting in line for her lunch, Mackenzie sent a message to Nate: 'has John been outside my building all morning? I think that's a bit much'
On her walk back, after waving at John in the seat of his car, Mackenzie got a reply from her boyfriend.
'It's a temporary solution until I get a background check completed on a body guard.'
'Ha ha. Very funny.'
'I'm serious, Mack. We can talk about the details later'
'Nate, this is irrational. I don't need a bodyguard.'
'We'll talk tonight! Love you'
Mackenzie spent the rest of the afternoon irritated about the situation. She didn't need a bodyguard. That was a waste of time, money and resources. She tried to rationalize what happened and where Nate was coming from but that didn't stop her annoyed mood from lingering.
Later that afternoon, she was heading into the Bass Industries boardroom. She was a bit early still and took a moment to breathe after she shrugged off her coat. She ran a nervous hand through her hair as it fell over her shoulders and smoothed her hands across her black skirt. The more she thought about Nate's bodyguard comments, the more lost in her thoughts she got.
Was she just taking the situation too lightly? She had a lot of regrets over what had transpired, truly. She hated feeling trusting enough to have let Maya in, she hated that the situation had escalated and played out how it did. But it wasn't like she had a long list of enemies she needed to worry about.
Truthfully, Mackenzie was just tired of the dramatics. She hated the fact that she could end up being a witness in Maya's trial if she plead not-guilty to the criminal charges. She just wanted the entire thing over and done with so she could move on. So everyone could move on.
Come January she knew Nate was going into a very serious mayoral campaign mode. And Mackenzie herself was still supposed to be doing a three week business trip to Australia, though she hadn't covered that topic with Nate yet. She figured that was something they could deal with after the holidays.
The holidays. That made Mackenzie's brain whirl, too. Nate made a halfhearted joke to her Sunday night about going somewhere hot for Christmas, just the two of them. She humoured the idea but knew they couldn't follow through. Christmas was about family and she knew that was important to Nate especially. Even if she wasn't speaking to her dad, Mackenzie hadn't been in New York for the holidays in over three years. And she hadn't really had Christmas with Nate before at all.
So they would stay in the city and hopefully manage their way through the family dinners with no complicated drama.
Slowly the rest of the meeting invitees filtered in, rounded off by Chuck Bass at the head of the table. This was another update meeting about Bass Australia and how they were proceeding after their public relations issue. Mackenzie gave a small, succinct report on the operating plans for the new Bass Foundation charitable organization in Sydney but otherwise found herself distracted for most of the meeting. When it ended, Chuck asked her to stay and chat.
"Please don't ask me how I'm doing," Mackenzie started, raising an eyebrow at Chuck. He laughed and leaned back in his chair, adjusting his tie.
"You can't fault people for making sure you're okay," Chuck said simply.
"I know, I just don't want to talk about it anymore," she replied, propping her elbows up on the table and resting her chin on her hands.
"You're welcome to take some time off from work, if you need it," Chuck continued, narrowing his eyes at her.
"Thank you for that, but I don't need to," Mackenzie replied. "There's lots to be done before the holiday break, especially with this Australia stuff."
Chuck nodded. "I appreciate your work ethic. Just..some advice." He paused. "It's easier to deal with things as they happen, instead of pushing them to that dark filing cabinet of your mind. Take it from me, an expert in repression."
"Listen, it's unfortunate but I've dealt with a lot of shit before this incident. I'm not trying to brush it off or anything, I know it's serious. I just.. I have my own ways of dealing with it. One method is therapy and my doctor is going to get her money's worth this week." Mackenzie sighed. "Thank you for caring, Chuck."
Chuck gave her a soft smile. "Just..go easy on Nathaniel. I think we both know he's going to hover in a bad way for a while."
Mackenzie nodded. "Love is a funny thing, isn't it."
Chuck let out a laugh, then glanced at his phone. "Funny is a word for it."
"Nate is not going to be on board with me going to Australia, you know."
Chuck sighed. "I'm aware. And you know you don't have to go, either. We've been managing remotely."
"We both know it would be better to get the foundation set up in person. Shoes on the ground, get my Australian counterpart familiar with things."
Chucked nodded in agreement. "Of course. But..well, it's not my place to have an opinion on your relationship."
Mackenzie raised an eyebrow at him. "Really?"
His lips curled up into a smirk. "All I will say is you and Nathaniel both are adults and are probably in a better place emotionally, this time around in your relationship. He'll be swamped with election things for the next year, I'm sure you can be on the other side of the globe for a few weeks. He'll survive."
Mackenzie let out a long exhale. Chuck raised some good points. But, she didn't want to unpack a potential argument with Nate right now. They could worry about travel plans in the new year.
"Okay. Let's forget about work talk." Mackenzie pointed down the table at Chuck. "What the hell do I get Nate for Christmas?"
Nate got to the office early on Monday. John had picked up both he and Mackenzie from his apartment and he was dropped off first. He had a series of meetings that morning, including one with his human resources director.
Despite the calamity of the weekend and drowning himself in Mackenzie on Sunday, he couldn't forget everything that happened at the party. He was determined to figure out how things played out and he knew his biggest challenge was going to be keeping a level head. He just couldn't help but think about how different things would have gone.
If Mackenzie had actually made it upstairs to the party, they could have made up and danced together. She would stay by his side when he was meeting with all the important people he needed. Maybe there could have been a repeat of The Spectator holiday party a few years ago…
Instead he had to save her from a psychopath with a gun at the loft.
Leanna, his HR director, explained what he needed to know about policies, disciplinary action and dismissals, if required. Leanne was stone-faced and honest with Nate - she had been working alongside The Spectator for years and had seen a lot of people come and go.
A while later, she joined them for the debrief meeting about the party with Leo, Taylor and Lindsay.
Leo gave a thorough breakdown of guest feedback and upcoming plans about the press release regarding the final donation totals. Taylor covered the financial details briefly, explaining she was wrapping up all the invoicing that morning.
When everything seemed wrapped up, Nate finally chimed in.
"I want to talk about what happened with our guest list process on Saturday," Nate started. His tone was level as his eyes darted from Leo to Lindsay to Taylor.
"Correct me if I'm wrong, but I had the final say in who was on the guest list. Isn't that right?"
Leo nodded. "Of course."
"So the final approved guest list I sent to Taylor on Friday afternoon was solid." Nate nodded to himself, shuffling the papers on the desk and displaying a freshly printed copy.
"Meanwhile, this is what Lindsay was using Saturday night," Nate pointed to the leftover list of paper attached to a clipboard. "So what I need to know is who removed a guest from the list without my authorization."
A strange silence fell over the room. Leanna clicked her pen on the boardroom table and looked at all the faces at the table.
Taylor's eyes shot toward Lindsay. The two girls shared a long glance.
"Ladies?" Nate's patience was growing thin quickly.
Lindsay opened her mouth to say something then clamped it shut. She nervously ran a hand through her long brunette ponytail, biting at her lip.
"Okay, let's do this step by step," Nate let out a long breath and closed his eyes for a moment. "I sent the approved list to Taylor. Then what happened?"
"I sent it to Lindsay to print," Taylor answered, folding her hands in her lap. She avoided Nate's eyes.
"I printed it," Lindsay concluded. "But.."
Nate's hands grew into fists as he rested on the tables. "Who scratched Mackenzie's name off the list? You were the only two with access. One of you consciously used a black marker and removed her so who was it?" He took another breath. "Listen, I need some honesty here. This incident unravelled a series of events that should have been avoided but we can't go back in time here. I need to know what caused this communication error and how we can avoid this moving forward."
Lindsay threw her hands up in the air finally. "Can I speak with you alone, Nate?"
John brought Mackenzie to The Spectator office after her meeting at Bass Industries. She had to admit it was nice having someone there to drive her where she needed to go. A driver was one thing but Nate using the term bodyguard was another. She figured that was a conversation that they needed to have soon.
When she walked through the front doors of the office building, Mackenzie felt a strange sense of deja vu. The area was clear of excited party guests this time but the bitter, irritated feeling crept in. She paused at the desk where Lindsay was sitting, face down staring at her keyboard.
Mackenzie rolled her fingers on the countertop and Lindsay jolted her head up. Her eyes grew wide when she saw Mackenzie standing there.
"I'm here to see Nate," Mackenzie said slowly. "Am I allowed in this time?"
"Mackenzie, of course. Yes. Go ahead." Lindsay motioned towards the elevator to go upstairs.
Mackenzie paused before she walked away, narrowing her eyes at Lindsay. It looked as if she had been crying and suddenly, Mackenzie felt remorse about her tone. She opened her mouth to apologize but instead let out a long exhale. She hardly had the energy. Mackenzie swiftly turned and headed towards the back of the foyer, pressing the button to go upstairs.
She tried to be discreet as she headed through the office, head down. As she approached Nate's office, she noticed Marie's desk was unoccupied. She was grateful, in a way, to not have to even put the effort in to ignore Taylor. But at the same time, she had prepared biting commentary if necessary and now it was going wasted.
Mackenzie knocked on Nate's door and opened it slowly when she heard his voice. Inside she found Nate at his desk, leaning back in his chair. Across from him sat Leo, suit jacket off and tie loose around his neck. They both looked a bit tired. Between them sat a bottle of amber coloured liquid and they were each gripping a few fingers worth in short crystal glasses.
"Hey," Nate beamed when he saw her walk in. He placed his glass on the desk and stood to greet her with a kiss. She smiled back, shrugging off her coat and dropped into the chair beside Leo, saying hello to him, too. She smoothed out her dress and shook her head as Nate offered her a glass.
"Sorry you didn't make it out Saturday," Leo started. He then paused awkwardly, shifting to face her for a moment. "Actually, I can't lie. Jenny told me what happened. Wish you had made it to the party instead, Mackenzie."
Mackenzie shrugged but offered him a soft, grateful smile. "Thanks Leo." She sighed and glanced between the two of them. "Speaking of. I was just pretty rude to Lindsay downstairs and that wasn't fair. I don't know what came over me but…"
Nate sighed and took a large sip of his scotch. That was definitely out of character for Mackenzie but he knew her emotions were pretty out of sort lately. "Lindsay has had a bit of a day."
"At least she stopped crying," Leo offered, his lips drawing into a straight line.
"And at least she didn't try to attack me," Nate replied, raising his glass to Leo with a bitter laugh.
Mackenzie's eyes shot open. "What?"
"Can I speak with you alone, Nate?"
Nate looked at Lindsay, then Leanna, and nodded. Leo stood to leave but Taylor stayed in her seat.
"Fine. If Lindsay is going to crack under pressure, I'll just be honest. I took the name off the list." Taylor crossed her arms. "And I instructed Lindsay to not let her in."
Nate's eyes grew wide and he slammed a hand on the table. "What? Why?"
Taylor narrowed her eyes. "Because as your assistant, I knew it was important to keep you free of distractions. Considering the amount of investors and shareholders that were in attendance."
"Are you out of your mind? Why the hell would you think to -
"Mr. Archibald," Leanna's calm, neutral words broke through. As if to ask him to lower his voice.
"Your personal life is on the rocks so I thought it would be best to keep that at bay for a few hours."
Nate was seething. He took in a sharp breath. "You're both fired."
It turned out Nate couldn't just fire them. Lindsay stayed in the boardroom and cried to Leanna while Taylor opted to huff and storm out of the office building. When she returned, Leanna intercepted her and explained that due to her negligence, The Spectator would not be renewing her job contract in the New Year. Nate had been standing outside of his office with Leo when he heard the shouting and when Taylor lunged towards Nate, Leo took a side step to stop her.
Lindsay would keep her job.
Taylor left again in a fury, taking a box of her things.
Nate finally felt a weird sense of satisfaction and relief.
When the two men finished retelling the story to Mackenzie, she bit her tongue. She felt strangely sorry for Nate having to deal with all this unnecessary drama at work. She wanted to sing-song about how right she was about Taylor, a smug sort of I told you so but it didn't feel right.
Throughout this entire situation, Nate's wholesome innocence had shone through. He liked to see the best in people and he especially liked giving his staff opportunity. The fact that he had put faith in Taylor, letting her work so closely with him, and then she let him down, was hard. Mackenzie was reminded of Viv's words from a few weeks ago: "All I'm saying is there is going to be more Taylor Wheelers in your lifetime so you've gotta pick your battles."
"So..everything is okay?" Mackenzie finally clarified.
Is this mess finally over?
Nate leaned forward onto his desk and met her eyes. "I mean, aside from my residual anger, yes."
Mackenzie just smiled. She hated knowing Nate was still reeling from the whole situation but perhaps a good back rub and a hot tub would help him. She let herself daydream for a moment before Leo pulled her back.
"Do you think it's too soon for me to get your sister a Christmas gift?" At least he changed the subject.
Mackenzie turned to scan Leo's curious face. "Are you her boyfriend yet?"
"Not officially. But I've asked a few times," Leo replied with a laugh. "She's surprisingly difficult to pin down. Well, not pin down, really." He winked at Nate who just opened his eyes wide, hands up.
"Was that a sex joke? Dude, that's my sister," Mackenzie jumped in, playfully swatting Leo on the arm. "There is a set of beautifully beaded choker necklaces on display at L Train vintage near Delancey. She has been on the fence about investing in them for weeks."
"You're a doll, Mackenzie. Thanks." Leo stood up and waved to them both as he exited Nate's office.
"That was truly a pair I didn't anticipate," Mackenzie said with a smirk. She stood up from her chair and walked around to the other side of Nate's desk and placed herself down on his lap. Her fingers found his tie and she pressed her lips against his. The taste of scotch remained as she brushed her tongue over her own lips.
She smiled softly. "Hi."
"Is this the part where you tell me what you want for Christmas?" One of Nate's hands moved down her back and the other rested on her knee, swirling circles on her exposed skin.
"You don't have some weird Santa kink, do you?" Mackenzie raised an eyebrow at him. "Because I can work with that but I might need that scotch first."
Nate's head fell back with laughter for a moment before he met her eyes. "God no." He scanned her face quickly. This was..nice. It had been so long since he could just laugh with his girlfriend. God, he loved how she made him laugh with her sassy quips.
"There is nothing I want for Christmas, really." She snaked a hand up behind his neck and ran it through his hair. "Just you by my side. And the willpower to survive the Vanderbilts." She knew Nate likely had some wonderful gift planned for her already. He was so damn good at gift giving, it always left Mackenzie feeling anxious. How could she live up to that? So far, all she could think of getting him was a watch.
And he already had a dozen perfectly good, expensive watches.
That morning she had a great plan. She had called Tripp and practically begged for any SNL tickets between now and the end of the season. He had let her down gently, saying he would try but it was a long shot. What good was his role at NBC if he couldn't pull a few strings for family?
"Listen, considering how you managed to deal with Maya on Saturday, the Vanderbilts are a breeze, Mack."
Mackenzie's smile faded slightly and she tried to hide it.
Nate noticed. His hand pressed against her back. "Hey, sorry. I didn't mean to.."
"No, no." Mackenzie shook her head and cut him off. "I'm okay. I should talk about it, I guess."
Nate was quiet. She hadn't said much about the whole thing since sobbing to him early Sunday morning. He expected her to close up but he didn't anticipate her just ignoring it altogether. The only time he brought it up was when he got an update from the officers handling the case. There would be a trial in January, that may be quick and easy if she pleads guilty. If not, well, then that would be an entirely different situation.
"I just still feel pretty stupid about the whole thing."
"Mack," Nate's hand moved from her leg to cradle her cheek. "You're not stupid. Don't say that. You are trusting and kind and considerate and level-headed. And so brilliant."
No, no. Trusting and kind meant she was susceptible to being taken advantage of. Considerate meant she could be a pushover, a people pleaser. Level-headed drove her straight to irrational thoughts. And would a brilliant person really try to barter with a gun wielding insane person?
Nate could see the doubts swirling around in her eyes and he hated it. Mackenzie had worked so hard over the years to have some faith in herself and seeing it start to collapse really broke his heart.
"You know you didn't do anything wrong, right?" Nate's thumb moved gently across her.
"I know." Her voice was barely audible. "I'm sorry, sometimes everything feels perfectly fine then it all just comes back in a weird wave."
"No need to apologize." He soothed circles into her back. "Promise you'll always tell me how you're feeling."
She swallowed and murmured out an okay, leaning her head onto his shoulder for a moment. Nate just held her there, nestled onto his chest.
"Hey." Nate's voice was quiet in Mackenzie's ear. "What do you want to do for dinner?"
"Would you judge me if I just wanted spring rolls from Thai Kitchen?" She felt Nate's laugh rumbling through his chest.
"I expect nothing less from you, Humphrey."
Tuesday night, Mackenzie was elated that both Jenny and Serena were free to go Christmas shopping. Apparently Serena was struggling to shop for Dan, too.
Truthfully, Mackenzie hadn't seen much of her sister-in-law lately. Now nearing the end of her second trimester, it seemed Serena finally sort of looked pregnant but somehow still managed to dress and look like a supermodel. The effortless glow really suited the tall blonde, though.
"I would like to say I appreciate you both not asking me about my feelings tonight," Mackenzie said, glancing at both girls as they sat with cups of gelato. The shopping trip had been successful - except Mackenzie came up empty handed. The three women were tucked into a table at the front of an Italian cafe on the second floor of Saks.
Jenny rolled her eyes with a smirk. "I couldn't bear you yelling at me again."
"Mack, you've never once treated me like a fragile housewife during this pregnancy so I can't imagine you need hand holding from us to deal with the aftermath of crazy," Serena added, licking off her small ice cream spoon. She gave Mackenzie a grateful smile. "Sorry we couldn't find anything for Nate, though."
"Honestly, I didn't think I'd find it at Saks anyway," Mackenzie revealed, nudging the large brown bags at her feet. "But retail therapy is good for the soul." She was very happy with her own purchases, including silk pajamas and a big LEGO set for Henry's Christmas gift.
After taking one last bite of her gelato, Mackenzie took a deep breath. "Okay so I've been thinking. If dad wants to sell the loft, it might be nice to have one last Christmas morning there."
Serena exchanged an apprehensive look with Jenny. The younger blonde sighed. "Mack, aren't you still not on speaking terms with Dad?"
Mackenzie ran a hand through her hair, pushing it to the side. "Yes. But it's Christmas and well, I'm trying to work on my feelings regarding that. So." She closed her eyes. "It's just an idea I'm trying to put into the universe."
"Well, I know Dan would love that. He's always retelling me stories about the Humphrey Christmas mornings of the past," Serena smiled. "Though I never ask, he loves to explain the Waffle Iron Fire story all the time."
Both Mackenzie and Jenny laughed. "It's a good story though. There is a photo somewhere of dad without his right eyebrow because of that."
Mackenzie sighed. It was strange to think she hadn't talked to her dad in so long. Maybe it was rose coloured glasses looking back, but she even kind of missed him. They had a lot of work to do still, if they were going to attempt to fix their relationship, but maybe she owed it to herself to try again. If anything, this whole situation over the past weekend was just a stark reminder that life could be fleeting.
"Mom is hosting dinner," Serena continued on the Christmas topic. "But I would be happy to do brunch at the loft. It would be nice." She pointed her spoon at Mackenzie. "Aren't you obligated to the Archibalds that day?"
"Just Boxing Day out at the Vanderbilt estate this year. Nate said Christmas Day is for us." Mackenzie turned to her sister. "Are you inviting your non-boyfriend Leo?"
Jenny coughed out a laugh. "He may come to dinner but we're leaving it open ended."
"You seem happy, Jen," Mackenzie commented, tilting her head towards her sister. "However this Christmas plays out, it'll be a far cry from last year."
"But also an upgrade." Jenny laughed in agreement.
Serena's head darted between the two sisters. "What happened last year? I know you both avoided coming home."
"I did not avoid," Mackenzie defended herself. "I just intentionally didn't come to Manhattan so I didn't have to see Nate or my dad."
Truthfully, last December there was no way Mackenzie could have handled being home for Christmas. Not single and heartbroken. Not without their mom. Staying in London was the best thing for her brain at the time.
"Kenzie tried to cook us Cornish hens." Jenny paused. "Let's just say we ended up ordering in Indian food instead."
"Well," Serena held in her laughter as she leaned back in her chair. "I think maybe after all of the dramatics of the last few months, we're all due for a good, old fashioned Van Der Woodsen holiday dinner. With pie a plenty."
Mackenzie nodded in agreement. They all fell into a comfortable conversation, discussing Christmases of the past and laughing. It was a welcome moment, another reminder of the simple things in life. It felt like the last few months had been a whirlwind. It was hard to believe the New Year was approaching and life was going to hit the ground running for everyone.
Dan and Serena were going to be parents.
Nate was gearing up to run for Mayor of New York.
Life was coming quick, regardless of Mackenzie's doubts or fears.
Sunday morning, with the stress of the week long in the past, there was a gentle snowfall and Mackenzie thought everything felt just perfect. Sometime Saturday, Nate arranged for a beautiful evergreen tree to be set up in his apartment. On the one hand, Mackenzie kind of missed the traditional idea of picking out a tree as a family but it was kind of nice to have it just appear overnight.
Nate had pulled out a box of his Christmas decorations which were incredibly lacking. So Mackenzie had sent him to the loft that morning to retrieve a few boxes from the storage room while she made breakfast.
The sounds of some old Frank Sinatra record flooded through the apartment as Mackenzie mixed pancake batter and sipped a mug of coffee. She was dressed in just leggings, an oversized knit sweater and wool socks. For the first time in years, she felt excited for the holidays. She was especially looking forward to her first real Christmas with Nate.
She did feel a pang of sadness, thinking about her family. Christmas was one of her mom's favourite times of the year. Nate told her he had called Rufus and filled him in on what happened. She was grateful he did. Part of her wanted to reach out and just wave a white flag but she was still having a hard time. Though, if this stupid thing with Maya had taught her anything, it was that life was short. So maybe she needed to just forget being stubborn and try harder.
She was pulled from her thoughts when she heard footsteps in the hallway and when the door opened, more than one pair of feet came in.
"Miss Kenzie?" Henry's small voice called out.
"Hey, boots off first, Henry," Nate laughed at the small boy as they stood in the doorway. The doorman from downstairs followed in and dropped a few boxes near the living room. Mackenzie peaked her head out of the kitchen and smiled when she saw Nate helping Henry out of his coat. When he was free of his gear, the young boy dashed towards the kitchen to greet Mackenzie with a hug.
"Hey Hen," she said with a smile. "You're a nice surprise!" Her eyes darted towards Nate who offered an apologetic smile.
"Henry's parents had a last minute event to go to this morning and his nanny doesn't work Sunday's. So -
"Uncle Nate said I could help decorate the tree," Henry jumped in. His eyes darted from Mackenzie to Nate, a toothy smile bright on his face.
"Well, thank goodness you're here, Henry," Mackenzie replied to him. "You'll have to help Uncle Nate with this stack of pancakes, too."
All three of them sat at Nate's small round kitchen table. To Mackenzie, the addition of Henry to their cozy December morning was just what she needed. The young boy's nonsensical stories and excited energy for Christmas was refreshing. Mackenzie loved to watch Nate interact with his nephew, asking questions during his rambles and laughing at all his little jokes. It made her heart swell up, like a glimpse into the future.
"Is that syrup oh'ganic? That's all momma lets me have," Henry looked at the glass jar of syrup on the table.
Nate couldn't help but laugh. Of course Blair instilled that in her son. "Hen, buddy. Do you know what organic means?"
Henry just shrugged and nodded as Mackenzie poured the maple syrup onto his plate.
"This is the good stuff, pal. We won't tell your mom."
Filling up the four year old boy with sugary syrup may have been a bad choice but his energy was especially helpful when it came to decorating the tree. Well, at least the bottom few feet of the tree. Henry regaled them with his Christmas dreams regarding gifts from Santa and what he wanted to leave for the reindeer. Nate let him put the star on top, holding him firmly at the waist. They all celebrated their accomplishment and eventually, Henry found the opportunity to crash on the couch.
Mackenzie was seated on the floor near the tree, continuing to sort out any extra Christmas decor she thought might be appropriate in Nate's apartment.
She gazed across the room to watch Nate as he looked outside onto his patio, eyes locked on the gentle falling snow outside. Dressed in a navy cable knit sweater and dark jeans, Mackenzie couldn't help but stare. She was so grateful to have Nate and it was in these very moments, the moments that could easily be lost in the fray, that she was reminded of how lucky she was to have him.
"Do you remember that little vintage shop we visited in Amsterdam?" Nate's question pulled Mackenzie away from the box before her. She tilted her head with a smirk.
"Do you remember anything from that trip to Amsterdam?" She joked. That summer in London, on Nate's second visit, they took off to the Netherlands for a few days. It was a whirlwind trip, mainly spent exploring the city center of Amsterdam and Nate exploring his variety of marijuana related experiences.
"Cut me some slack, Humphrey. I wasn't high the entire time." He rolled his eyes with a playful smile. "Coming from the girl who threw up on the first night."
"You didn't tell me you bought edibles, Nate! It hit me too hard." She laughed with him and shook her head. "What about that shop? I think I remember it." They spent four or five days just adventuring around the city center, exploring shops and taking tours. They laughed a lot, that trip. Mainly because of their broken language barrier, though Dutch was a fun language to try and speak. Mackenzie mainly remembered it feeling carefree and disconnected. During those small trips, work and school and who they were didn't matter.
All that mattered was they had each other.
Mackenzie stood up off the floor and walked over to meet Nate at the window. His smile softened as she slid up beside him. His right arm snuck around her back, finding a place to rest on her hip. She leaned into his shoulder.
"I just remember they had this wall of snow globes and for some reason, looking out on this," Nate motioned his arm out his patio doors, to the sticky snow falling, "managed to take me right back there. Somehow it feels like it was so long ago but also like we were just there yesterday."
Mackenzie hummed happily into his shoulder. That summer had been really special. She loved getting to know London, hanging out with Jenny. She had enjoyed her program at school and the miniature vacations with Nate had been the icing on top. It was nice to reminisce about the good things, the nice things, the warm things. Considering how their relationship fell to shreds after that summer.
"It'd be nice to go on a trip again," Nate continued. "God knows when we'll have time for that."
Mackenzie pulled her head back and looked up at him. "I know. Someday." She sighed. It probably wasn't the best time to bring up her potential travel plans but it made sense. "Chuck wants me to go to Australia for a few weeks in the new year."
Nate continued looking ahead and squeezed her waist. "I know. He told me."
"Really?" Mackenzie raised an eyebrow as she scanned over his face. "And you managed to keep your feelings about it to yourself all this time? Colour me shocked, Archibald."
Nate's head tilted back as he let out a chuckle. "We both know I don't want you to go. But I know it'll be important for the foundation. I don't know. I didn't bring it up because I didn't want to start an argument. I've been feeling really protective of you already so I've just been ignoring the prospect of you being on the other side of the globe."
"I don't have to go," Mackenzie replied. She truly wasn't even sure if she wanted to. The idea of being away from Nate for just one night now was daunting. How could she deal with a 16 hour time difference and 30 hour plane ride in between them, too?
"Can we talk about this after Christmas?" Nate shuffled to face her, wrapping both his arms around her back. She brought hers up to his neck and nodded.
"Yes."
Mackenzie leaned up on her toes and planted a kiss on his lips. She could feel him smiling. Before Nate could comment, a small voice came up from the couch.
"Ewwwww." The two adults turned to see Henry had stirred from his nap. The young boy was now shielding his eyes from seeing them kiss.
Nate laughed and pulled away from Mackenzie, moving to crouch beside Henry on the couch. "Oh, give it a rest, Hen." Nate reached out and ran a hand over the boy's hair. "Hey. How about we go check out the snow in the park? I bet Kenzie would love to make a snowman."
Mackenzie nodded with wide eyes. "And then we can team up against Uncle Nate in a snowball fight, too."
Nate glanced at Mackenzie, a fake look of hurt on his face. "Betrayed by my own girlfriend, wow."
Henry pulled himself up to stand on the couch, putting a hand on one of his hips. "It's okay Uncle Nate, we'll go easy on you."
Mackenzie did eventually take a day off work. Not exactly for her mental health but more so because she was tired of going back to the loft to gather her clothes. While there had been no official celebration or transition, she was suddenly living with Nate. But her wardrobe was still mainly in her closet in Brooklyn.
She hadn't been back to the loft alone since that night with Maya. Nate insisted on going with her every time she needed to drop by so far. It had always been quick ins and outs, she never lingered.
She was a bit anxious about being back there with only her own thoughts but at least it was midday and bright when she walked in. The shattered window had been replaced and aside from a slight colour variation in the trim, looked the same. Really, everything felt the same. It all felt very normal. As if she had never been panic crying on the couch or trying to talk Maya down from the edge.
Her appointment with Simone this week had been a real rollercoaster. It wasn't the first time Mackenzie had sobbed on her couch, of course. But she got a lot of feelings off her chest. The doctor had helped her start to unpack some of the guilt she had been feeling.
"If you could indulge a theory for me," Simone said with a smile.
Mackenzie hiccuped then shrugged. "You're the expert here."
"You feel bad for Maya still. You always did."
"I guess."
"It's not a bad thing. In fact, it speaks to a truly kind nature within you, Mackenzie. You're allowed to feel bad for her, of course. But I think you need to accept those feelings, sit with them, then let it all go. This isn't your mess or burden. It doesn't have to be, at least."
Pulling her hair up into a ponytail and rolling up the sleeves of her sweater, Mackenzie let out a soft sigh and got to work in her bedroom. She had a dozen bins and a clothing rack from a moving company to fill. Before she started to go through her things, she scaled her hands across the shelves of records and picked one out for her afternoon soundtrack. She decided on an rereleased Oasis pressing from the late 90s. Mainly because she was a sucker for Champagne Supernova and singing along always put her in a better mood. For a reason she couldn't quite figure out, this song seemed to be connected to a missing positive memory.
Not that she was in a bad mood. She felt pretty okay, most of the time. There was still just an air of uncertainty lingering and she couldn't pinpoint how to fix it. There was an incomplete feeling.
Unsurprisingly, as she started to dig through her closet, she was easily distracted. Tucked in the back was a few boxes from her life in Hudson. It was like a time capsule from high school. A ticket from prom night. An old friendship bracelet. Her yearbook from senior year.
In another box, she found a mess of old photos. A true timeline of the Humphrey family. Her toothless grin posing with a curly headed Dan and an overall clad Jenny. A photo of Allison painting as Mackenzie sat by her side, scribbling in a colouring book. Mackenzie in her team uniform from her days as a high school lacrosse player. Jenny wearing the first dress she had ever sewn. Dan at his high school graduation.
Mackenzie paused when she came across a photo she didn't remember - of her and Rufus. He was holding her at his side, caught in a fit of laughter. She was maybe three or four in the photograph. There was a streak of blue paint on his forehead and the colour matched the stain of Mackenzie's hand. It was a simple, innocent moment. One that Mackenzie didn't remember, of course.
It made her heart tighten.
She tucked it into a pile of things she intended to keep, letting out a long breath. She stood up to stretch and determined she needed a coffee before she tackled the rest of her closet. She padded her way to the kitchen, dragging her sock feet across the floor.
As the coffee maker started to work it's magic, there was a knock at the door. Mackenzie tilted her head in a brief panic, wondering who it might be. Only Nate knew she was spending her afternoon at the loft.
Jenny and Dan had their own codes for the lock.
She took a deep breath, contemplating whether or not opening the door was safe. She knew that was irrational but it was only fair to feel guarded. She exhaled and took a few steps over, slowly pulling the wide door open.
Her jaw dropped open slightly when she realized who it was.
Standing across the threshold of the doorframe was Rufus Humphrey, scarf wrapped around his neck, peacoat unbuttoned, suitcase sitting beside his feet. His skin was tan, his eyes soft. They both remained still for just a moment.
Mackenzie tangled her hands together anxiously, clutching the ring on her finger. "What are you doing here?"
Rufus sighed, reaching to loosen his scarf. "I was hoping we could talk."
Mackenzie hesitated, feeling her chest tighten again. Then, she swung the door open and motioned for him to come in.
Looks like the Humphreys are finally putting everything on the table. And Nate and Mackenzie finally get to have Christmas together. It'll be smooth sailing, of course.