Hook knew he needed to go patch things up with Emma. He hated it when she was yelling in his face, but he did rather like it when she was doing other things to his face. If he wanted those other things to happen again, he had to put on the puppy dog eyes, promise to be a good boy, and then just hope she didn't find out about any other skeletons in his closet. He didn't really see how any of this mess was his fault, though. After all, Rumple killed Milah first. The Dark One deserved whatever he had coming to him, as did anyone who knowingly debased themselves by defending him.
As Hook was contemplating how completely right he had been, he failed to notice just how thoroughly he was in the wrong place at the wrong time. The Chernabog soared overhead, looking for the heart with the darkest potential. The delectable scent of Hook's darkness caught the beast's attention, and with a powerful roar, it swooped down. Hook didn't even have a chance to react before to it was on top of him.
The Chernabog's massive claw latched onto Hook's chest. Hook cried out in agony as his heart was magically pulled from his chest, its red glow obstructed by clouds of black. The former pirate watched in horror as the Chernabog tossed the heart into the air and grabbed it with his mouth as if it were a peanut. As the beast consumed the heart, Hook's body went limp, and then he was gone.
Hungry for more hearts with dark potential, the Chernabog took to the skies, leaving Hook's cold corpse on the sidewalk.
As Maleficent finished receiving a full report of Rumple's treachery from Diablo, she sent the raven off to further keep an eye on her alleged ally. It was very little surprise that Rumple betrayed them, but re-releasing the Chernabog was a bold move. Maleficent's response would have to be bolder.
"Our alliance with Rumplestiltskin is dissolved," Maleficent announced to Cruella and Ursula. "He has seen fit to betray us by setting the Chernabog upon us."
"Bah! Should've known that goldfish wasn't worth keeping around," Ursula said. "Well, I do like our little 'Queens of Darkness' party better."
"Not that I don't love our new title," Cruella said. "But shouldn't we be more worried about the Chernabog? That wretched beast is no laughing matter."
Maleficent merely smiled. "My dear, you underestimate me."
"Unfortunately, if Rumple isn't going to bring us the hat, we'll have to knock Sora down a peg ourselves. That's not going to be easy...," Ursula said before pausing for a minute to rethink the situation. "Hmmm, actually, on second thought, Flotsam and Jetsam, my divine little vipers, did happen to see something I might be able to use to our advantage."
"If you have a path, then follow it," Maleficent instructed. "Cruella and I will continue our search for the Author and his pen."
"And how exactly are we going to do that?" Cruella asked. "In case you've forgotten, our only lead to the Author just finished stabbing us in the back."
Maleficent ran the tips of her fingernails slowly through Cruella's hair. For a moment, Cruella feared that the evil fairy would lash out at her painfully. However, the only pain Cruella felt was the quick sting of a strand of hair being plucked from her head.
"You said before that your hair's color was created by the Author's ink," Maleficent said, holding up the strand of hair knowingly. "And magic seeks out like magic."
As Hades blew off steam over the broken in vault by torching Pain and Panic a few times and Jafar worked to analyze the magical spell left on the door, Fish and Blackheart returned to the construction site via Corridor of Darkness.
"Uh-oh, Hades is torturing the minions," Fish said to Blackheart. "That can only mean one thing."
"That it's 5:00 P.M.?" Blackheart answered.
"REALLY not in the mood for the snippy nyeh-nyeh-nyeh," Hades replied, turning on Fish and Blackheart. "Some son of a Pasiphaë BROKE IN to Maleficent's magic vault and picked our pockets clean. D'ya think Malef's gonna be happy to see a shiny new Villain's Vale with an EMPTY VAULT? I think NOT! And to top THAT all off, Edgington and Newlin have gone MIA. Normally, hey, no big, I'm the Lord of the Dead. I can track vampires and all living dead down in a heartbeat... y'know, if they had a heartbeat. But I can't find them, and that does NOT bode well for any of us. Ya got the concept?"
Fish thought about the broken in vault for a minute and then back to the day she'd just had. Those rats had responded to the toll of Ratigan's bell as if magically hypnotized. That couldn't be a coincidence.
"Did that vault happen to have a magical bell capable of controlling rodents?" Fish asked.
"Well, see, here's the thing, I don't know specific inventory," Hades said. "All I know is last time I saw the vault, it was full. Today? Boom. Empty. ... Wait, 'scuse me? A bell? Rodents? Am I missin' somethin'?"
"Blackheart and I were investigating the local crime boss, hoping to squeeze some money out of him," Fish explained. "But the little shit used a magic bell to sic a bunch of sewer rats on us."
"Missing vampires, stolen magic artifacts, and a megalomaniacal rodent with a magic bell," Blackheart listed off. "Doesn't sound like three unrelated incidents to me."
"Okay, so where's the rat with the bell? Can you find him?" Hades asked.
Fish shook her head. "We found his hideout and didn't die. That means that hideout will be dead to him now. It's compromised."
"I can find Russell," Blackheart said, walking towards the town without offering any further information.
"Uh, how exactly are you planning on doing that?" Hades asked. "All the magic of the Underworld I had couldn't find him, babe."
"Demonic senses," Blackheart explained without halting his progress. "I can track his scent."
Fish shrugged and followed after him.
"New guy is like a demon bloodhound. Right," Hades said. "Cuz that makes complete sense."
The Darkside Heartless in Storybrooke's town center faded into nothingness with a roar, its captive heart being set free by the Keyblade. Sora, Donald, and Goofy exchanged some high fives over their victory, and Regina and Emma seemed to be at ease with the monster gone.
"Is it over?" Regina asked.
"Yeah, there shouldn't be any more Heartless in town now," Sora said.
"Though Maleficent can summon more if she wants to," Donald added. "So be careful!"
"Back to the mansion then?" Emma asked. "Belle should be there waiting for us now."
"You guys go on ahead," Sora said. "We'll give the town a quick once over to make sure we got all the Heartless."
Regina nodded and teleported herself and Emma away in a plume of purple smoke.
"Oh good, they're gone," a voice from behind cooed.
Sora, Donald, and Goofy drew their weapons and prepared for another fight once they saw Ursula slithering towards them.
"Keep your scales on, boys," Ursula said. "I just wanted a little talk between old friends."
"Yeah right!" Sora said. "The only thing you want to talk about are things that make your more powerful!"
Ursula chuckled. "So true, but I think you'll want to take my little bargain this time."
"No way!" Goofy said. "We know better than to trust ya, Ursula."
"After how you tricked Ariel, we'd have to be stupid to trust you!" Donald added.
"Fine, have it your way," Ursula said. "Let Riku have a broken heart. It'll probably help Maleficent control him again anyway."
Sora felt a pang of guilt in his gut. He knew that was what Ursula was counting on, but that didn't make it any easier. Sora still felt responsible for Riku, and, against his better judgment, he wondered if Ursula could in fact help with that.
"What are you getting at, Ursula?" Sora asked.
Ursula grinned wickedly. She had him now. Hook, line, and sinker.
"I have a spell that can heal a broken heart," Ursula said. "After all, it's the least you can do after you broke it in the first place."
"Sora, no!" Donald said.
"Yeah, you know Ursula's not gonna keep her word," Goofy said.
"Oh, tut-tut, I admit that in the past I've been a nasty," Ursula said. "I won't pretend otherwise, but the truth of the matter is that we can be mutually beneficial to each other. Don't you want to help your friend?"
"You have to swear that your spell will actually help him," Sora said. "No poisons or anything that will hurt him."
"I have little interest in killing or harming Riku," Ursula said. "My spell will do exactly as I say it will... for a price, that is."
"I knew it!" Donald squawked.
"Now, now, I'm not asking for much," Ursula said. "The price of the spell is that you, Sora, have to give up your Drive Form powers."
"NO WAY!" Donald yelled.
Sora didn't respond right away. On one hand, it was obviously a set up to weaken Sora for Maleficent. But on the other hand, Sora had beaten Maleficent and Ursula before he even had his Drive Forms. The Drive Forms weren't the only powers in his arsenal by any means, and if sacrificing them meant that Riku could get some peace, then there really wasn't any choice.
"It's a deal," Sora said.
"SORA!" Donald and Goofy called out in unison.
Ursula summoned up a golden contract that cast a bright yellow glow on everyone around it. Sora skimmed the wording carefully to make sure there wasn't anything hidden between the lines. Satisfied that the deal was sound, Sora picked up the squid ink pen and signed his name on the dotted line. Once he did, the contract dissolved into a streak of light and began to encircle Sora. For a moment, all Sora could see was the blurred light with flashes of his friends' worried faces from the other side. Ursula's deep chanting echoed through his ears.
"Silk brocade cast in shade, O' chill of the Arctic come now! Legalese, infirmis, misery et cordis, Drive Forms disavow!"
Sora began to notice his clothes change. His Drive Forms came from the magic clothes that Flora, Fauna, and Merryweather bestowed up him. Tears were developing at the seems of his outfit, and the fabric itself looked like it was rotting without the fairies' magic. Before long, it started to crumble and dissolve. By the time the light cleared, Sora was standing in the middle of Storybrooke wearing nothing but his boxer shorts.
"Guess that answers the age old boxers or briefs question, HA!" Ursula bellowed. "Now then, handsome, the contract's magic will seek dear ol' Riku out on whatever world he's on. Our arrangement is complete."
Ursula cackled with fiendish glee as she vanished into a cloud of octopus ink. Sora turned to see Donald and Goofy staring angrily at him.
"HOW COULD YOU DO THAT?" Donald shouted.
"Because I don't need the Drive Form powers," Sora said. "And nothing is more important than making sure Riku is okay."
Neither of them seemed to be convinced by that.
"Look can we talk about this later... after I get some clothes?"
Loki was vaguely aware of Victor leaving the bed when it happened. However, after stretching out over the fine linen sheets, Loki allowed sleep to wash over him again, and Victor's departure was forgotten. Dreams of a viper striking his tongue and causing it to swell too large to tell any lies haunted Loki's sleep. The Liesmith woke when he instinctively reached out for Victor but found only an empty place beside him.
The early morning sun was creeping into the bedroom and the image of the viper was too vivid in Loki's mind to let himself return to his dreams, so he hopped up and slipped on a black and green silk robe to preserve his modesty. It wasn't entirely necessary for him to be clothed. After all, Chateau d'Onterre's only other inhabitants were Victor and the corpses of the household's former staff reanimated by magic from the Black Cauldron. Dressing was more habitual than done out of any courtesy.
The library was right down the hall from the master bedroom, and if Victor had remained in the chateau, there was little doubt in Loki's mind that that's where he'd be. Sure enough, Loki's suspicions were correct; Victor, dressed in a green and silver robe, was sitting at one of the library desks, pouring over several books at once. Victor didn't move from his position at all when Loki came up behind him and planted a kiss on his neck.
"What exactly is so fascinating that it caused you to depart from our bed early?" Loki asked, resting his chin on Victor's shoulder.
"The demons of this house may have been exorcised, but there was a mystical imprint keeping me awake," Victor replied without looking up from his books. "I did a cleansing spell to get rid of it. Then, since I was already awake, I indulged my curiosity about this place's history."
"Any discoveries of note?"
"The previous lord of this estate had a daughter born with magic. Apparently, in this world, magic is a thing of shame and dishonor, so he kept her locked away to preserve the family's reputation. However, without proper training, the child came to be possessed by a demon and slaughtered everyone within the chateau."
"Heh! Such is the price of short sighted pursuit of reputation."
"Indeed. The tale I pieced together did, however, pique my curiosity further, and so I sought out texts on the Circe of Magi and the history of magic on this world."
Loki hopped up onto the desk and positioned himself seductively so as to allow Victor a small peak beneath his robe.
"Really, Victor, your fascination with researching everything is tiresome. And if I'm to be tired out so soon after waking, I'd prefer it to be a result of a more... active pastime."
"Your appetite in insatiable," Victor replied, struggling to keeps his eyes on his reading material. "I am trying to learn if this world has a magical capability that could be of use to us."
Victor suddenly found that nothing he was reading was making sense. A quick turn of the page revealed nothing but gibberish on the following pages. Victor sighed, closed the book, and looked up at Loki who was looking entirely too pleased with himself for that little trick.
"Curse me for falling in love with a Trickster God," Victor said with a sigh before climbing onto the desk with Loki.
Victor grabbed Loki's wrists and pinned them down onto the desk as he pressed his mouth against his lover's. Loki wrapped his legs around Victor and forced the mortal man down on top of him. The lovers continued their sensuous embrace, blissfully unaware of what was lurking in the shadows.
The old hag's cauldron bubbled and hissed as she stirred the rancid liquid. Once the fearsome Evil Queen of the Dwarf Woodlands, now Grimhilde found herself trapped in a decrepit old form that she'd hastily assumed in her thirst for vengeance upon Snow White. All that was about to change, however, with this spell. Now that Grimhilde had the last key ingredient, the heart of a vampire, she could restore what she had lost long ago.
"Boil, cauldron, boil," Grimhilde said with a cackle. "Boil, cauldron, boil! Youth within your depths I see, to restore what once was lost to me!"
Grimhilde poured a carefully measured drop of dragon's blood into the concoction and the entire potion turned a vibrant shade of crimson.
"Brew the magical recipe!" Grimhilde chanted. "Boil, cauldron, BOIL!"
A billow of smoke emerged from the enchanted brew and cast a thick fog over the room before sinking and settling as a layer of mist hovering an inch above the floor.
"Ah, a delightfully wicked concoction," a voice from one of the potion shelves said.
Grimhilde looked up to see Professor Ratigan sitting there next to a jar containing Eye of Newt.
"Professor, what brings you back to my humble cottage?" Grimhilde asked.
"Ehehehe, I'm... having a bit of... a difficult time managing my turf," Ratigan confessed. "The bell you enchanted for me wasn't enough to deter two allies of Maleficent seeking to take control of my territory."
"Allies of Maleficent?!" Grimhilde shouted as she whirled around and her eyes flashed with anger. "And you potentially led them here?"
Ratigan recoiled from the witch out of fear of one of her dark spells, but before Grimhilde could lash out, the door of her cottage was kicked in. Blackheart, Fish, Hades, and Jafar entered the tiny house with vicious determination in their eyes.
"Don't blame the rat, witchy-poo," Hades said. "Ya took our vampires and emptied our vaults and thought we wouldn't notice?"
Grimhilde ran towards her mirror. "Magic Mirror on the wall, consume these-"
But Grimhilde was cut off by Blackheart intercepting her and grabbing her by the throat. The force of his attack made her brittle old bones ache. She tried to finish her spell, but Blackheart's grip on her throat was too tight to allow her to speak. His willingness to end her life should she attempt anything was self evident.
Ratigan attempted to scurry off through a hole in the wall, but Fish managed to grab the infamous Professor by his tail before he could escape. She allowed her toxin to seep into him.
"You're going to stay put right here for me," Fish said. "I'm going to take a big ass cut of your money and then maybe we can talk about letting you live."
"She attempted to trap us within this looking glass," Jafar said as he walked over to the mirror. "Hmmm... zaba kabudabra!"
Jafar extended his arms outward and the mirror's glass began to glow a blinding white. When the light cleared, Russell and Steve were standing there, trying to get their bearings and adjust to their newfound freedom.
"Let's not get sucked in there again," Steve said. "I couldn't tell where my reflection ended and I began."
"I'm gonna drain that little witch of every fucking drop of blood in her body," Russell vowed.
"But first, witchy-poo's gonna tell us exactly where everything she stole from Maleficent's vault is," Hades said.
Grimhilde scowled and managed to choke out a reply. "You're going to kill me either way... What reason do I have to tell you anything?"
"Allow me," Fish said, stepping forward and placing her hand on Grimhilde's cheek. "Tell us honestly, now. What did you do with the contents of Maleficent's vault?"
"I... did nothing," Grimhilde said. "I wasn't the one who broke in."
The six Overtakers shared confused looks.
"Could she be lying?" Jafar asked.
Fish shook her head. "No. It's impossible for her to resist my toxin. That, and the fact that she just surrendered her only bluff makes me believe she's being genuine."
"Can I eat this ancient cunt then?" Russell asked.
"Wait. WAIT!" Grimhilde pleaded. "I can ask the mirror where you might find your vault's contents. I can see anywhere throughout all the worlds. Let me live, and I'll find your stolen property."
Hades contemplated it for a moment. "Eh, what've I got to lose? Try any witchy business, and Russell here has express permission to eat you. So I'd be very careful about your next move if I were you."
Grimhilde thanked them and hobbled over to her mirror.
"Magic mirror, reveal who's at fault, show us the one who broke into the vault!"
The answer left Jafar gritting his teeth in anger.
The magic from the strand of Cruella's hair led Maleficent and Cruella to Mr. Gold's Pawn Shop, an establishment formerly run by Rumplestiltskin. As Maleficent entered, she admired Rumple's collection of priceless magical artifacts. She herself had such a collection back in her vault. Maleficent made a mental note to send someone to scour the ruins of Villain's Vale to recover her property. The enchanted hair fluttered over to a glass case and rested on top of it. Maleficent peered into the case to see a rack containing a multitude of pens.
"Third one from the left," Cruella said. "I'd recognize that wretched, wretched pen anywhere after what it took from me."
Maleficent summoned it to her hand, and the strand of Cruella's hair flew up from the counter and wrapped itself around the pen in recognition of the like-magic.
"Yes, most excellent," Maleficent said, admiring the utensil. "To think, such a marvelous power was sitting locked away under the Dark One's very nose."
"No ink," Cruella said, looking around. "Which means the pen is useless to us even if we find the Author."
"We will find more ink," Maleficent said. "Even if I must pluck every hair from your head, we will find the ink."
Cruella clutched her perfectly styled hair defensively. "And then, we can all get our happy endings?"
"Indeed," Maleficent nodded. "Though before I promise you anything, I wish to know yours. What did the Author take from you that was so precious?"
Cruella contemplated lying. She'd been bluffing and keeping this a secret from everyone for years. She and Isaac were the only two who knew the secret, and now Isaac was dead. No one had to know besides her. Yet Maleficent was promising to change everything to be in her favor. If there was one person to trust with that information, it was the Mistress of All Evil.
"He took away my ability to kill people," Cruella said. "After I murdered mummy dearest, he seemed utterly appalled and rendered my murdering prowess impotent. Now, I just want that back. I want to feel the life draining from the eyes of someone killed by my own hands once again."
A devilish smile cracked onto Maleficent's face. "Well then, Cruella, my dear, that is exactly what you shall have once we win."
Cruella legitimately got her hopes for the first time in years. The prospect of being her old self again was deliciously enticing, and Cruella simply could not wait to finally be able to pull the trigger and watch as some fool perished in front of her.
"But first things first before we depart Storybrooke," Maleficent began. "Rumplestiltskin has turned against me, and that cannot stand. With you unable to kill, I require someone more adept at murder who knows the Dark One's weaknesses."
"You'll want Captain Hook for that," Cruella answered. "That entirely too handsome pirate has been hunting Rumple for centuries. Unfortunately, he's thick as thieves with those heroes in Storybrooke now."
Maleficent circled her hand over the orb of her staff and it began to glow with green fog. Maleficent stared into the light and witnessed the sight of Hook's death earlier that day at the Chernabog's hand.
"Ah, so with the three of our hearts guarded by my magic, it seems Hook had the heart with the greatest potential for darkness in Storybrooke," Maleficent said. "More intriguing still! I believe I shall restore him to life as the man he once was before those wretched heroes stifled his darkness."
"Can you really do that?" Cruella asked in awe. "I thought no magic could bring back the dead."
Maleficent merely laughed at that. "My power is far greater than any limits."
Maleficent's torso began to glow with green fire and she waved her arms to enact the spell. A circle of fire appeared on the ground and slowly began to rise into the silhouette of a person. Cruella's jaw dropped as she watched as the green flames subsided and a handsome man with dark hair, black leather clothing, and a hook for a hand took form. Cruella could tell just be looking at him that this was the pirate she once knew years ago, not the simpering lovesick fool he had become in Storybrooke.
Captain Hook lived again.