ATM: The Bonehead and the Brain – Angry Confetti
The Shield moves to Hollywood and Seth and Sasha continue their long distance relationship.
Will Stephanie McMahon Hardy and Bayley Black Heart succeed in taking NXT from Triple H?
Find out in the next episode of The Bonehead and the Brain.
Chapter Twenty Three – Superstar Confessions
A/N: This chapter contains suggestive scenes that are not suitable for younger readers.
Sunday morning, Hayworth's old dorm, Harvard, Cambridge, MA, 6am
Finally Seth and Sasha exhaled long enough to wipe the sweet beads from their eyes long enough to see what time it was. They were officially late for church and if they didn't get ready to go to Clearwater soon, Beth Hardy was going to Transcend them naked to the sanctuary where everyone would point and laugh at them. Given that they had slept over at Harvard for three extra days there was a high chance that when they finally did get to Clearwater everyone was going to point and laugh at them anyway but at least this way they'd have their clothes on.
"Catch your breath and get dressed," Sasha said to Seth with her hands over her head waiting for the waves of love-making pleasure to stop radiating through her body. Seth dragged his legs to a standing position and navigated his way to the shower smiling from ear-to-ear.
"I love you," he said before turning on the shower spray.
"I love you too," Sasha said following him inside.
"Back off Aladdin!" Seth said hustling her out of the shower. "Wait until I'm done,"
Sasha smiled at Seth amorously, "I love it when you man-handle me," she said as Seth backed himself into the shower before the inevitable return to love-making that was about to take place.
"If we don't leave soon I think Alexa's gonna quit as my Maid of Armour," Seth said. The little Great One had already text him several times asking him if they were on their way to Clearwater, Florida.
Moments later Sasha couldn't understand a word Seth was saying she was too busy making imprints on his abs with her mouth as they made love on the bathroom floor, taking their total number of places where they made love to eleven. They were having a great time making up for so much lost time after being on separate coasts for so long but they knew they had to stop.
They just didn't want to.
Clearwater Baptist Church, Clearwater, FL, 10am
Seth and Sasha held each other's hands as the congregation of Clearwater Baptist Church turned to greet them as they arrived having being Transcended by Beth Hardy at Alexa Bliss' behest after finally getting dressed and ready for church. The pews were also filled with familiar faces of the DX family, the 3Cs, Charlene, Cassidy and Carla as-well as Roman, Dean, Renee, Alexa, Bianca Belair, Ember Moon, Street Profits, AJ Styles and Charlotte Flair. The most unpleasant surprise was the sight of Stephanie, Jeff and Bayley sat at the very front of the church of all places dressed in co-ordinated, purple, green and black looking like the perfect malevolent family that they had become. Seth zeroed in on Beth Hardy who was clearly anxious to see him.
"Finally you guys made it, what took you guys so long?" Beth asked them as she ran over to them and pulled them over to her and Miss Glee. She didn't sit with her parents which made Seth even more anxious and he signalled Alexa Bliss to sit next to him. Alexa did just that bringing Bianca Belair with her. Sasha held Beth's hand seeing how uncomfortable she was with her parents in the same church as the DX family. Suddenly having a lovefest with Seth was not as special anymore now that Sasha could see the real stress Beth had been under in their absence.
"I'm glad you guys got all that love-making out of your system because Seth is clearly needed here," Alexa said firmly and Beth blushed at her comments about Seth and Sasha's whereabouts.
"Is that why you guys look so happy?" Beth asked them and Seth and Sasha giggled before replying.
"Yes," they said in unison before laughing much to Stephanie and Bayley's chagrin.
Seth got up and went over to Jeff Hardy, "You know if you want to sit with your daughter that's fine with me. I don't want any trouble alright?" he said peaceably.
"You haven't seen trouble yet," Jeff threatened Seth getting to his feet. "How dare you get close to my daughter without asking my permission. I don't think God would approve of you trying to drive a wedge between us Rollins,"
Seth shook his head furiously and he was about to read the Riot act to Jeff Hardy when he noticed Buddy Murphy was sitting next to Charlene MacKenzie. "I'll deal with you later, right now I got some ego to bruise," he said and he waved at Charlene's dad the Senior Pastor of the church who greeted him benevolently.
"Seth I'm so glad you came back, the whole congregation has been asking for you!" Pastor McKenzie said to Seth graciously.
"I'm sorry I couldn't come back sooner I've been so busy serving God outside these four walls," Seth said. "I'd love for you to meet my wife Sasha, she's right over there next to Alexa and Bianca,"
"I'd love to meet her please sit next to my daughter I'm sure the man she brought over from Australia will be happy to give up his seat so you can sit in the front row where I can see you all," Pastor Mac said and Seth smiled at the instruction.
"I'm sure he would," Seth said as Pastor MacKenzie instructed Sasha, Bianca and Alexa to sit next to Mac with Seth, forcing Buddy Murphy to sit in the seat behind.
"How did you pull that one off?" Alexa asked Seth impressed. "Nicely done my friend, Buddy looks like he just got told to sit at the kiddie table at a wedding,"
"You think I was gonna let anyone upset you or embarrass you after everything you've done for me and Sasha?" Seth said to Alexa and she beamed gratefully.
"Seth you're a really great guy you know that?" she said genuinely. "I'd be so happy just to date someone half as decent as you,"
"I would expect more than that for my Maid of Armour," Seth said to Alexa warmly and he kissed her hand respectfully while Bayley looked on intently.
"Easy there tiger, don't let them get to you," Stephanie said noticing the uneasiness in her new ally. "Remember its all just a big play. They're all just pretending but the Truth will come out today,"
"Yes it will," Bayley said. "I can't wait for us to testify,"
Stephanie, Jeff and Bayley laughed out loud earning the disapproving looks of the entire congregation. Minutes later they were sitting outside having been dismissed by the peackeepers for disturbing the service.
"What a bunch of stuck up congregants!" Bayley complained.
"Nevermind that our voices will still be heard, we'll just wait until the service is over and then we'll go back inside and say what has to be said," Stephanie said.
Jeff furrowed his brow, "What exactly are you two going to say?" he asked his wife.
"Just that Seth was behind Chyna's death and he bribed Bayley into keeping her mouth shut," Stephanie said.
"Okay and what are you going to say?" Jeff asked Bayley Black Heart.
"That I told Seth I would keep his secret on one condition; that he sleep with me the next day. Well we all know that didn't happen!" Bayley said. "I guess the thought of sleeping with me was so repulsive he couldn't go through with it, or Sasha moved on him so fast he forgot about our deal,"
"So when the Truth finally comes out everyone will know the man Seth really is and all this glory he's getting from being a Prayer Warrior will vanish in seconds and he'll just be a loser pro wrestler with his contract in our hands," Stephanie said and Jeff grinned slyly.
"I love the idea of you being in control," he said to his wife and he kissed her roughly on the mouth.
Bayley fanned herself, "Cool off Jeff you're making me hot, I haven't been this excited since I saw Seth in Hayworth's dorm," she said excitedly.
"Seth isn't going to admit that he's been lying all this time, what are you going to do when he denies it all?" Jeff asked Stephanie and Bayley.
"Bayley will let him know that her original offer is still on the table; if he sleeps with Bayley we'll take back everything we said and admit that we were lying about the whole thing," Stephanie said.
"So what about Chyna? Don't you think he should go to prison for trying to kill her?" Jeff said and Stephanie shook her head.
"No, I don't care what happens to Chyna. She got her life back that's good enough for her, Seth is no good to us in prison. We want him to be out and about so we can make money off of him," Stephanie said.
"And so I can sleep with him whenever I want," Bayley said and Jeff nodded.
"So what about Sasha? She's in love with him, how are you going to get them to break up?" Jeff asked and Stephanie and Bayley laughed.
"That's the easiest part of all of this. The minute Sasha realises the Truth about what happened that night in New York, she'll see Seth for the murderous, lying bastard that he is and she won't want anything to do with him. Then she'll marry some Hollywood hotshot and all will be right with the world," Bayley said and Jeff nodded impressed.
"And then you'll marry that murderous, lying bastard instead?" he asked Bayley and the Black Hearted One shrugged.
"Marry Seth? Sure, if he can make it out of the bedroom in one piece," Bayley said darkly. "Revenge is so sweet,"
"Oh you have no idea," Stephanie said. "After everything DX has put my family through I am going to take back what belongs to me and DX are going to be ashamed and embarrassed when they find out that the guy they love so much is nothing but a criminal,"
Jeff thought deeply for a moment, "Do you know why he killed Chyna?" he asked Stephanie and he Billion Dollar Princess fell silent. "Steph, do you know or not?"
"Let's just focus on getting what we do know out in the open," she said but Jeff wasn't happy with her response and he pressed her for more information.
Finally Stephanie couldn't take anymore interrogation and she decided to answer the question, "Okay but if I tell you why he did it, you have to promise me you won't tell anyone," she said and Jeff furrowed his brow.
"Who am I gonna tell? You guys are my whole family I don't talk to anyone else, so why did he kill Chyna?" Jeff asked Steph.
"Because...um, wow I can't even get the words out," Stephanie said and Bayley looked at the time.
"Guys the service is almost over we need to go back inside now," she said.
"It can wait, let's go," Stephanie said and they went back inside the church just as Pastor MacKenzie was about the say the closing prayer.
As the troublesome threesome headed back into the sanctuary Chyna approached Pastor MacKenzie and asked him if she could say something to the church.
"Of course," Pastor MacKenzie said with a warm smile and he took his seat while Joanie faced the entire congregation.
"Hi everyone my name is Joanie Laurer Helmsley, most of you will know me as Chyna. What you might not all know is that earlier this year I was dead," she started and Stephanie gasped.
"Oh no she's gonna steal our thunder by telling everyone the Truth before we had a chance to!" Stephanie grimaced. "Jeff stop her!"
"Calm down or we're gonna get thrown out again," Jeff said as the peacekeepers zoned in on them again.
"Everyone thought me coming back was a miracle and it was but there was a reason I died that night in New York and before Stephanie and Bayley can use this an as opportunity to create even more trouble for everyone, I thought since we're all in God's house together this morning, now would be the best time to come clean," Joanie looked at Hunter, "Babe, I have a confession to make,"
Everyone turned and looked at Hunter as Chyna found the strength to make her Superstar confession.
"Finally," Trish said and Randy nodded, "This has been a long time coming,"
"Babe can this wait? I just got a text from the Pentagon, they're holding Miss Alexander and they want to see me, Sasha and Roman and they want us to bring Blinky, Summer and Justice with us," Hunter said.
"Yeah it can totally wait," Chyna said heading back to her seat, "I'll come with you maybe its better I tell you on the way,"
"No tell him now, tell Hunter the Truth Joanie or I will!" Bayley said.
"Pipe down young lady," Pastor MacKenzie said.
"Look Hunter I know how much everyone here means to you," Joanie said.
"Even us?" a random church congregant said.
"Yes if you're a fan of mine I'm a fan of yours," Hunter said and a "Triple H!" chant started in the church.
"Everyone chanting this man's name needs to get on the altar right now!" Miss Glee said and the loud congregant quieted down much to Seth and MacKenzie's amusement.
"I love Miss Glee," Seth said and Sasha frowned.
"Who's Miss Glee?" she asked Seth and he pointed to the lady in the big white hat. "How do you know her?"
"She's a friend of mine, I'll introduce you to her after Joanie's made her confession to Hunter," Seth said.
"Hunter if you want me to tell everyone right now I will but it can wait, just tell me what you want me to do," Chyna said.
"Okay tell everyone but make it quick, I got a feeling this trip to the Pentagon is gonna have a lot of security clearance," Hunter said and Chyna headed back to the altar and took a deep breath.
It was time for Chyna to make her Superstar confession and tell the Truth about what happened that night in New York.
Find out what Chyna's confession is in the next episode of ATM: The Bonehead and the Brain – Rage in the City.