CHAPTER 21

"Hey, guys. How are you all today?"

The past week had flown by - Finn's time was taken up by driving up to Columbus and back almost daily, training for at least 3 hours a day, practising for Glee club and socialising with his family and friends. To make his life slightly easier, his racing team had installed a simulator in his bedroom in Lima to save him going all the way to Columbus just to, in essence, play a more life-like video game. They had even connected it to a headset and microphone so he'd be able to communicate with his team in Columbus.

Before he knew it, he was in the auditorium and those auditioning for the Regionals solo would be getting ready to sing soon.

"So, on my list here, I've got that Rachel, Mercedes, Kurt, Santana, Emily and Finn are all auditioning. Is that right?"

The 6 of them nodded.

"Is there anyone else who wants to audition? Speak now or forever hold your peace." He asked. Nobody spoke. "That's good. Okay, who wants to sing first?"

Rachel jumped to her feet.

"I'll go first!" She exclaimed. Everyone rolled their eyes - even Mr. Schue did.

"OK, go ahead, Rachel."

Rachel ran onto the stage and stood before the stand. Everyone knew exactly what she was going to sing even before the first lyric escaped her lips.

Don't tell me not to live

Just sit and putter

Life's candy and the sun's

A ball of butter

Don't bring around a cloud

To rain on my parade

Don't tell me not to fly

I've simply got to

If someone takes a spill

It's me and not you

Who told you you're allowed

To rain on my parade!

I'll march my band out

I'll beat my drum

And if I'm fanned out

Your turn at bat, sir

At least I didn't fake it

Hat, sir, I guess I didn't make it!

But whether I'm the rose

Of sheer perfection

Or freckle on the nose

Of life's complexion

The cinder or the shiny apple of its eye

I gotta fly once

I gotta try once

Only can die once, right, sir?

Ooh, life is juicy

Juicy, and you'll see

I'm gonna have my bite, sir!

Get ready for me, love

'Cause I'm a "comer"

I simply gotta march

My heart's a drummer

Don't bring around a cloud

To rain on my parade!

I'm gonna live and live now

Get what I want, I know how

One roll for the whole shebang

One throw, that bell will go clang

Eye on the target, and wham

One shot, one gun shot, and bam

Hey, Mister Arnstein, here I am!

I'll march my band out

I will beat my drum

And if I'm fanned out

Your turn at bat, sir

At least I didn't fake it

Hat, sir, I guess I didn't make it

Get ready for me, love

'Cause I'm a "comer"

I simply gotta march

My heart's a drummer

Nobody, no, nobody

Is gonna rain on my parade!

To see the actual song, click:

watch?v=W0ULgXjo4Yo&ab_channel=MusicOfGlee

Or search… 'Don't Rain on my Parade Rachel Berry'

Everyone clapped politely. No one could deny that Rachel had a pretty decent voice. However, her performance was missing something. For lack of a better word, it was lacking 'oomph'. It didn't have the emotion and was pretty lackluster in all fairness.

"Great job, Rachel. Can I just say one thing though? You singing the same song over and over again is getting slightly… boring." Mr. Schue remarked. Everyone gasped. "Look, don't get me wrong, you have a beautiful voice. But the thing is so does everyone else, and their versatility might be the reason they pip you for the solo." He said.

"I can sing another one! Please, let me sing another song!" Rachel begged. Mr. Schue shook his head and sighed.

"Sorry, Rachel. You had your shot. If I let you sing two songs, I'd have to let everyone sing two songs, which I'm not about to do. Please take a seat. Mercedes, if you'd like to go next."

Mercedes nodded, stood up and strutted to the front of the room. She was fairly confident and in keeping with her diva personality, she showed it. Although everyone knew that she was probably going to sing an R'n'B or Soul song, nobody knew exactly what she was going to sing.

"All right, Mercedes. Take it away…" Mr. Schue said.

Oh, she may be weary

Young girls they do get weary

Wearing that same old shaggy dress, yeah yeah

But when she gets weary

Try a little tenderness, yeah yeah

You know she's waiting

Just anticipating

For things that she'll never, never, never, never possess, yeah yeah

But while she's there waiting, without them

Try a little tenderness (that's all you gotta do)

It's not just sentimental, no, no, no

She has her grief and care, yeah yeah yeah

But the soft words, they are spoke so gentle, yeah

It makes it easier, easier to bear, yeah

You won't regret it, no, no

Some girls they don't forget it

Love is their only happiness, yeah

But it's all so easy

All you gotta do is try, try a little tenderness, yeah

All you gotta do is, man, hold her where you want her

Squeeze her, don't tease her, never leave her

Get to her, try, try

Just try a little tenderness, ooh yeah yeah yeah

You got to know how to love her, man, you'll be surprised, man

You've got to squeeze her, don't tease her, never leave

You've got to hold her and rub her softly

Try a little tenderness, ooh yeah yeah yeah

You've got to rub her gentle man, all you gotta do, no no

You've got to love her, squeeze her, don't tease her

Gotta try nah nah nah, try

Try a little tenderness, yeah, watch her groove

You've gotta to know what to do, man

Take this advice

To hear the actual song, click:

watch?v=RRbR_aC_ptY&ab_channel=Jo%C3%A3oSilva

Or search… 'Try a Little Tenderness Glee'

It was an amazing performance, much better than Rachel's for sure. Mercedes had combined soul and jazz with emotion and created a lethal combination. She was definitely one of the favourites to get the solo and she knew it too.

"Wow, Mercedes! Just wow!" Mr. Schue exclaimed after the song. "You've come so far in the past three years! It's incredible."

"Thanks, Mr. Schue. I couldn't have done it without you." Mercedes replied.

"Could I just give you one piece of constructive criticism, as one of your biggest fans?" He asked. Mercedes nodded. "I just think… you're too stationary, Mercedes." He said. "We need a soloist who's comfortable moving around, and is not just standing and singing in one place. You don't have to be a dancer like Mike, but a bit more than a 'park and bark' would be great for future performances."

Mercedes nodded. She had heard that feedback before and used to just brush it off, but if that was what would cost her Nationals, she should probably take heed.

"OK, great job Mercedes. Next up is Kurt. good luck, buddy." Mr. Schue said. Kurt nodded and approached the stage. Kurt

Some people can get a thrill

Knitting sweaters and sitting still.

That's okay for some people

Who don't know they're alive.

Some people can thrive and bloom

Living life in the living room.

That's perfect for some people

Of one hundred and five.

But I at least gotta try

When I think of all the sights that I gotta see

And all the places I gotta play,

All the things that I gotta be at.

Come on, papa, what do you say?

Some people can be content

Playing bingo and paying rent.

That's peachy for some people,

For some hum-drum people to be,

But some people ain't me!

I had a dream,

A wonderful dream, papa,

All about June in the Orpheum circuit.

Gimme a chance and I know I can work it.

I had a dream.

Just as real as can be, papa.

There I was in Mr. Orpheum's office

And he was saying to me, "Rose,

Get yourselves some new orchestrations,

New routines and red velvet curtains.

Get a feathered hat for the baby;

Photographs in front of the theatre.

Get an agent and in jig time

You'll be being booked in the big time."

Oh, what a dream.

A wonderful dream, papa.

And all that I need is eighty-eight bucks, papa.

That's what he said, papa.

Only eighty-eight bucks.

Papa

You ain't gettin' eighty-eight cents from me, Rose.

Rose

Well, I'll get it someplace else! But I'll get it! And get my kids out!

Goodbye to blueberry pie.

Good riddance to all the socials I had to go to,

All the lodges I had to play,

All the shriners I said hello to.

Hey, L.A., I'm comin' your way!

Some people sit on their butts;

Got the dream, yeah, but not the guts.

That's living for some people,

For some hum-drum people I suppose.

Well, they can stay and rot!

But not Rose!

To hear the actual song, click:

watch?v=Uj3PXL2SHgI&ab_channel=BryanO%27loughlin

Or search… 'Some People Kurt Hummel'

Everyone clapped at the end of the song. Although he had done a great job, for some reason, it wasn't up to the caliber of his usually stellar performances.

"Great job, buddy." Mr. Schue said. "Um… look, I loved the performance but can I please give you some feedback, again, just as a caring fan?"

"Sure." Kurt replied nervously.

"Um… so you know how that song was sung with great fanfare by Broadway legends such as Merman, LaPone, Bernadette. Those are some awfully big shoes to fill and I just think… I'm not quite sure you've done that. Maybe next time, pick a slightly less well-used song and use your energy into making an absolute unique cover?"

Kurt nodded but his insides were in turmoil. With that feedback, he surely wasn't getting the solo. Up in the stands, Finn turned to Emily, who was sitting next to him.

"Did you understand a word of what he just said? Because for me, it was like he was speaking Japanese."

Emily giggled.

"Hey! At least I know I'm not the only one." She responded. Finn snorted, and the two of them both turned their attention back to the stage, where Santana was getting ready to perform.

"So, Santana, what are you singing for us today?" Mr. Schue asked.

"I'll be singing Amy Whinehouse's Back To Black."

Mr. Schue whistled in shock and interest.

"Wow. Big song. Iconic song. Take it away, Santana."

He left no time to regret

Kept his dick wet

With his same old safe bet

Me and my head high

And my tears dry

Get on without my guy

You went back to what you knew

So far removed from all that we went through

And I tread a troubled track

My odds are stacked

I'll go back to black

We only said goodbye with words

I died a hundred times

You go back to her

And I go back to...

I go back to us

I love you much

It's not enough

You love blow and I love puff

And life is like a pipe

And I'm a tiny penny rolling up the walls inside

We only said goodbye with words

I died a hundred times

You go back to her

And I go back to...

We only said goodbye with words

I died a hundred times

You go back to her

And I go back to...

Black, black, black, black, black, black, black

I go back to...

I go back to...

We only said goodbye with words

I died a hundred times

You go back to her

And I go back to...

We only said goodbye with words

I died a hundred times

You go back to her

And I go back to black

To hear the actual song, click:

watch?v=Btjdpj_Vr1s

Or search… 'Back to Black Glee'

At the end of the song, everyone cheered. It was an amazing performance from Santana and it was probably her best performance in the Glee club.

"Wow, Santana. That was amazing." Mr. Schue said. "Three years ago, when you joined this club, you joined as a back up singer to Quinn. Now, you're truly grown into your skin and you're an incredible singer. We're going to take a quick break before we hear from Finn and Emily but you two have got your work cut out for you because these performances have all been fantastic so far!"