I was right when I thought I wouldn't have slept at all tonight. And with me, half the camp kept awake.
When the sunrise arrived, Charles, Sadie and I were ready to leave.
We're heading to this place Charles knows. It's a little muddy village in Lagras populated by some curious folks. They're not many and we should be able to deal with them. In the meantime, the others will move the wagons.
If I described Shady Belle as barely livable, this place seems we came here with Dutch to take our revenge on Bronte it was at night and the situation didn't seem so critic, but in the morning the wetness of the air rises the temperature and makes me sweat copiously.
We get down our horses and follow a little path which winds between the trees that deep their thick roots in the stagnant water, until we see a group of shabby shacks. Idling among them there are five or six men as shabby and dirty as the buildings are, if not worse.
"Alright, we take those on the left. Charles, you deal with the ones on the right" whispers Sadie.
I nod to agree with her.
We move low and quiet rounding the big house, when we notice something interesting.
"Look, it's a trapdoor. We can use it to get them from the back" suggests Sadie.
We climb through it and follow the house perimeter until we find a door and get inside. There are blankets and clothes on the floor, but no people. From the indoor, we reach the front of the house and peek outside from the broken planks.
"We have a good cover from here. We should start shooting" I say.
"You're right" she answers and takes her gun.
She gives me no time to take mine. She kicks the door and starts shooting at the men. Classic Sadie.
The residents, taken by surprise, have no chance to react and, also thanks to Charles who kills them silently while we catch their attention, we are able to finish them in a few minutes.
When we're done, we throw the bodies in the water to dispose of them and start to re-arrange the camp for when the others will arrive.
We sit on the steps of the big house, as soon as we finish.
"What about Hosea and Lenny's bodies?" I ask.
Every time my mind has a little rest, I can't help thinking about them.
"You think we'll be able to take them back and bury them?" I add when I feel their eyes on me.
"We can try. But… I don't know where we could find them" replies Sadie.
"They will be at the police station in Saint Denis. They take there the bodies before they bring them to the morgue" replies Charles.
"I know where it is. It's a very external part of the city, next to the factories. It shouldn't be hard to get there without alert the law" I say.
"You think it's a good idea? Go back in the city after what happened?" asks Sadie.
"We have to. We can't leave them there" I reply.
"And we'll go at night. So we have more chances not to be seen" adds Charles.
"What about John?" I ask.
"One thing at a time. We still don't know where he is. We'll try to find something about him too" answers Charles.
I nod and look at him in the eyes, feeling immediately better.
I know he'll do everything that's possible. I trust him.
When the others arrive we set the camp and then we all eat something. While we are all around the campfire, I move my eyes on each of my companions and I suddenly realize something.
"Where's Molly?" I ask to no-one in particular.
"Who knows. She disappeared a little after you left for the bank robbery" answers Miss Grimshaw.
"Trelawny too, he left last night, when he thought no-one would have noticed him" adds Mary Beth.
Well, I would expect that from Trelawny, but Molly… why has she left? And before everything happened.
Sadie, Charles and I tell the others about the idea to rescue Hosea and Lenny's bodies. They agree and reverend Swanson even tells us about a good place where we could bury them: it's in the surroundings of Lakay, but on a dryer and steadier ground than the swamps.
"We'll go tonight. I think it's better to do that as soon as possible" I say.
"Then go to sleep. You and Charles. You both haven't rested last night" replies Abigail.
I nod, but I already know I won't be able to do that.
When we're done with the lunch, Charles and I head inside the big house, where all of us will sleep. I chose to put my things in a little space on the floor between Abigail and Jack and Mary Beth. Charles sleeps opposite to me.
I sit on my blanket lying my back against the wooden wall. I feel tired, but I can't sleep. I can't close my eyes without seeing it again. I can't rest my mind without think about it.
It's the same thing that happened when my family died: I had to keep busy so not to think. But when that happened I had someone I could blame, I had a revenge to plan that helped me not to see my family bodies in my dreams.
Now… who can I blame? The Pinkertons? Of course but… I can't plan a revenge on them. It would be suicide. And when I'll close my eyes, Hosea's body will hunt me, together with Lenny's, Kieran's and even Sean's.
Maybe I have fallen asleep and what I've seen was a dream, or maybe I've just been lying down with my eyes closed and imagined it.
When Charles calls me, I sit up and look outside.
It's dark. Everybody else is in the room next the one where we sleep, seated down or sleeping on a hammock, like Uncle for example.
"Are you sure you don't want me to come with you?" asks Sadie.
"We can handle it" I answer before following Charles outside.
"It's raining" I remark as soon as I step out.
"Good, it will hide us. Come, let's take a wagon, it will be easier for carrying the bodies" Charles replies.
We tide the horses to the wagon, hang a lighted lantern on it and leave, following the little muddy path that heads south.
In the coolness of the night, I can feel the heat of Charles' body against mine and it gives me a little relief from the shivers the rain is causing me.
I turn my head to glance at his profile and reach out a hand to take his arm. He looks back at me and I smile while the raindrops fall on our faces.
Then, I suddenly remember something.
"What were you about to tell me that day? You remember? You acted kinda strange all day and then you told me something about Micah and that he was right. Right about what?" I ask.
He shakes his head and looks away.
"Never mind" he murmurs.
"Come on! Don't be shy" I insist pushing him a little with my shoulder.
"It doesn't matter" he replies.
I keep staring at him. He doesn't seem embarrassed, so maybe he doesn't want to tell me not because he's shy, but because is something that might worry me.
"Please, don't hide things to me" I say with a serious tone.
He sighs and glances at me for a second before focusing again on the road.
"Do you remember what Micah said?" he asks.
"He insulted you" I answer.
"Yeah but… his exact words."
I think about it.
Why is this so important for him?
"He said something like: 'his half black and half redskin'" I reply.
"He said 'I still can't understand how you can like someone like him'."
"Yeah it's the same. Why you care?" I ask.
"Cause he's right. How can you like me? I'm a half-blood, I have nothing to give you and I'm an outlaw. You deserve better, you should live a better life, away from…"
I raise a hand and cover his mouth forcing him to look at me.
He's dark eyes shine at the red light of the lantern.
"Listen… first of all, it was me who decided to live this life. Second… I don't care what you are, where you come from or anything else. I like you for how you are and you are the best man I've ever know. Third, if you ever, ever listen again to what Micah says, I swear, I'll hurt you."
When I finish, I remove my hand from his mouth.
He keeps staring at me and I instinctively give him a little kiss on the cheek.
He sighs, nods and focuses again on the road.
We reach the outskirts of Saint Denis in silence. Charles turns off the lantern when we're almost at the police station and we get off the wagon moving silently towards the backyard. There is a wall that surrounds it and an iron gate I think they use to move the bodies from there to the city graveyard, or the morgue.
"We can go inside, but how will we make the bodies get out from here?" whispers Charles.
I try to think about something while I look at the big gate and the high wall.
Then…
"If there is something Hosea taught me, is that a little performance sometimes can help" I say smiling.
I take my knife from the belt and place is near my left eyebrow.
"Whoah! What are you doing?" asks Charles grabbing my arm to stop me.
"I'll make them think someone attacked me and I'll stole the gate keys" I explain.
"Why you have to cut yourself?"
"You want to punch me?" I ask sarcastic.
He stares at me for a little before letting me go.
I push the blade on my forehead and feel a deep sting and something warm and fluid flowing down my cheek.
"Do I look attacked?" I joke.
Then, I take the belt with the weapons and leave it to Charles before turning my back at him and head to the front door.
"You should be running" he advises me.
"You're right" I say and start to speed up.
I reach the door, push it roughly, go inside and get to the man seated behind the table. I try to give him the most desperate expression I can make while I pant.
"I…. I have… please, please…"
He stands up and gets closer.
I keep panting while he makes me sit on the chair. When I finally can speak again, I tell him someone tried to stole my bag, I reacted and he took out a knife hitting me on my forehead.
He immediately offers to help me and leaves me alone to get some water.
As soon as I can't see him anymore, I look around for the keys. They are on a hook on the wall.
I grab them and run outside again.
"I guess we don't have much time before he realizes the keys are gone" I say to Charles when I go back.
It takes us a little to find the right one.
The bodies are on a cart and when I set my eyes on them, I feel a lump on my throat that doesn't make me breathe.
Charles loads them on our wagon, I close the gate and leave the keys on the lock.
We head back to camp.
There, we'll wait until dawn and then we'll move the bodies to the place Swanson told us about.
As we drive silently my mind goes to Arthur, Dutch, Bill, Javier and Micah.
Where would they be by now? Where's that boat leading them? It must be awful to be at see with a weather like this.
When we get to Lakay we cover the back of the wagon so not to leave the bodies under the water and get inside to dry and warm ourselves.
"What happened to you?" asks a worried Abigail looking at my forehead as soon as I enter the house.
"It was a diversion. It's not as bad as it looks" I answers touching it slightly.
She takes a rug and some water and cleans the cut.
At dawn we all get on the wagons and reach the established place. Reverend Swanson and Charles dig the two holes helped by Sadie and me and so we bury them.
Some people say something to remember them. Some cry. I keep my eyes down, unsure of what to feel.
I didn't know them very well, but I was starting to consider them like some sort of family. Lenny was always kind with me, just like a little brother. Hosea… I think he was a father for a lot of people at the camp and he was a good man.
I'll miss them.
"Hi Karen, Tilly" I greet the two girls.
They greet me in turn and I sit next to them.
They're washing some clothes. Karen has a half empty bottle next to her.
"How are you?" I ask them looking first at the bottle and then at Karen's face.
"Well, I guess we're good" answers Tilly.
Karen limits to a nod.
"There's something I can do for you?" I ask again.
They shake their heads.
Karen's been drinking since we buried Hosea an Lenny two days ago. She truly didn't separated herself from the bottle and the other girls and I are a little worried.
"Look, Sadie's back" says Tilly looking at the distance.
I stand up and go towards her as she gets down her horse.
"So, what's new?" I ask.
Abigail reaches us running.
"They sent him to Sisika. For now they're uncertain between forced labour or the hanging. But they don't reckon it will come to that" she adds when Abigail gasps.
This morning we sent Sadie in the city to find out something about John. No-one knows she's part of the gang and she wasn't with us at the robbery, so she's the only one of the group who can't be recognized.
"We'll find a way to get him out of there, I promise. We just need more men, so we're obliged to wait for Dutch and the others to come back" I say.
Abigail nods.
"What about the other thing?" I ask to Sadie.
"I left the letter at the post office. The house is still free, too, and I haven't seen lawmen in the surroundings" Sadie answers.
She also checked Shady Belle to see if someone moved there or if the Pinkertons settled some kind of trap. Apparently, they've not.
Moreover, she gave me the good idea of writing a letter that she left both at the post office in Saint Denis and Shady Belle. This way, when the others will come back and look for us, eventually they'll find the letter and understand where we're camped now.
"And also… Pinkertons disappeared from the city, just like they're not interested in us anymore" she adds with a thoughtful expression.
"That's odd" I say.
"No, it's not. I thought about it. They have John and they know we'll try rescue him. They're just waiting for us to do it to catch us" replies Sadie.
"Or maybe they're really just interested in Dutch and when they found out he took the boat, they stopped looking for him" says Abigail with a concerned voice.
I look at her.
I know she's scared that we won't be able to save John, even if she will never admit it.
I exchange a look with Sadie before talking.
"Yeah, I guess that's why" I say to reassure her.