Peter's plan

Chapter 22

"You look like a tomato."

Peter's been weird all morning, but after their little discussion in the 'BR4IN' exhibition, he's a little less weird. MJ's still pretty sure he's hiding something – something other than his spider secret identity, that is. She has it with her. The drawing. She's thinking about giving it to him more and more now, but they're never alone. She folded it in two this morning and slid it in her copy of A Room of One's Own that she still hasn't finished yet. She brought at least three other books with her on this trip, thinking she'd have plenty of time to read, but nope.

Too busy dealing with one particular idiot.

She has no idea what's up with him. She even went as far as asking Ned about it, which is too say. Was that too desperate? She's not sure. She's a little lost, she must admit it. She thought they were making progress, but then he went and kind of avoided her the entire morning or whatever. She's pretty sure now that it has nothing to do with her – or at least not something she does or did in the past. The stupid boy just probably has something to figure out on his own, if she had to guess.

He said it was always great to hang out with her.

She'd been ready to walk away and leave him alone for the rest of the day, and then he'd said that.

She still has a hard time not smiling every time she thinks about it.

What an idiot. (She's not even sure if she's talking about him or herself.)

He deliberately sits next to her during lunch. They don't talk much, but she listens to him rant about Star Wars and the Planetarium with Ned, ignoring Betty's knowing looks from across the table. Her friend ambushes her when she goes to the bathroom after lunch, but to her surprise it's not to tease her again.

"Are you okay?" Betty asks quietly, holding the door open for her.

MJ frowns a little, hesitating as she enters the restroom. "Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" she says after a couple of seconds of silence, and Betty gives her a small smile.

"I don't know, Peter's been acting all weird I thought I would ask."

MJ is almost tempted to quip back that she doesn't care about Peter, but then she figures Betty knows better than this. So she just shrugs, and Betty doesn't insist. MJ's definitely thankful for that. She asks her about Ned while they wash their hands, and watches Betty's eyes light up in the mirror as she talks about how much fun they have together, how sweet and respectful and kind Ned is, and MJ feels a surge of fondness for her friend. "Yeah, Ned is pretty great," she agrees, and Betty nods with a beaming smile.

There's only a few shows in English at the Planetarium, so Mr Harrington makes them all hurry. Peter sits next to her, and they share an armrest. MJ feels really stupid to internally gush about something so little and inconsequential as sharing a stupid armrest but yeah, she is. It's bad. They watch a documentary on the sun, and it's impressive and stunning. She tries not to think too much about the way his arm and shoulder are pressed against hers, because it's just plain distracting. Then she thinks about what would happen if she'd suddenly decide to lace her fingers with his. The thrill she gets just at this thought is almost completely overwhelming, if she's honest with herself.

Oh well.

After that, they walk around an exhibition on the same floor entitled 'The Great Story of the Universe', and she likes Peter's beaming and passionate smile throughout it all. Then they have fun with light games in the next room, and MJ is very tempted to kiss his stupid face at least three times there. It's like it's growing in her chest, overwhelming and fiery and warm, and it scares her a little – but in a good way, she thinks, because she doesn't fight it. Well, she does fight it in the sense that she doesn't kiss his stupid face no matter how much she wants too, but she also doesn't fight it because she accepts it entirely. She wants to kiss him, she really does, and that's okay.

But right now might not be very appropriate, she thinks.

They visit the Argonaut submarine afterwards, and at some point Peter, who's walking behind her, lunges forward to grab her elbow and hold her back. She turns to him, frowning in surprise, and watches as his entire face grows red. "I'm sorry I thought you were about to bump your head," he says very sheepishly, pointing to the low ceiling, and MJ turns to notice the pipe crossing the ceiling that she had not seen and would have probably hit if it weren't for Peter's reflexes.

"Oh, thanks," she breathes out, and Peter lets go of her to scratch the back of his neck with an embarrassed chuckle, bumping his own elbow on the wall in the process. She smirks and he makes a face, and then Flash complains behind Peter because they're blocking the way. MJ ducks her head and they resume their visit of the submarine. She thinks about her drawing tucked safely in her handbag. It feels like it's weighing a hundred pounds right now, for some reason.

They head to the aquarium afterwards, and listen to Zoha passionately talk about oceanography for half an hour. They don't have time for much more after that, so they hurry to the exhibition on Energies and walk around until Mr Harrington tells them it's time to go back to the hotel. They have tickets to get to the top of the Eiffel Tower at 6:30, so they make a quick stop in their rooms to freshen up a little, then they're out again. It's already almost 5:30, they have at least 45 minutes to get there, so Mr Harrington is panicking a little.

The trains are full so once they get to the subway station they have to wait for a little while before being able to all fit in one. MJ is kind of stuck in between Betty and Peter the entire ride, but she doesn't even think once about complaining. They change subway after ten stops, and then they get stuck for almost ten minutes because there's apparently people on the tracks at the next station. Mr Harrington is full on panicking by then, Mr Dell pretending he doesn't know him, and MJ notices that Peter seems a little agitated too.

She's leaning on one of the closed doors, and Peter is standing next to her, half turned away to face his best friend. MJ vaguely hears Ned apparently trying to reassure him over the chatter of the crowded train, and she frowns, wondering what's going on. She gets her answer a couple of minutes later, when Ned speaks a little louder. "Don't worry dude, I'm telling you we'll get there in time."

"Worried you're not gonna get your fill of mind control radiation?" MJ asks, poking him in the side, and Peter turns to look at her. She's leaning on the doors while he is standing, so she actually has to look up to meet his eyes, which is unusual since she's taller than him. They're very close, and she feels her heart jump in her chest for no reason. Then she actually reads his face and raises her eyebrows in surprise. "Wait, you're not worried," she says, narrowing her eyes at him and standing up so they are at the same eye level. "You're nervous."

"I'm not nervous," Peter retorts with a pout, but he's not entirely meeting her eyes. Out of the blue, she imagines what it would feel like to lunge forward and kiss that stupid cute pout of his. Oops.

"You look like a tomato."

"I don't!"

He sounds so offended MJ bites her lip to stifle a snicker, and then he's sighing, still extremely red. She considers the idea of poking his cheek for a second, but doesn't, because what the hell is wrong with her brain today really? It has her mistaken with someone who's actually comfortable touching other people and being flirty and confident and shit. That's not her. She's the snarky loner who messes with people and likes to read.

Oh but maybe that's not entirely true anymore. Or, maybe it's no longer the sole truth about her actually. Maybe now she's also the snarky not that much a loner who messes with people, likes to read and hang out with her friends every now and then, who has a crush the size of the moon on a stupid boy with a secret, and who wants to kiss him on his mouth just a little.

That's a nice summary, she thinks to herself as she stares into Peter's eyes intently. She can definitely live with that. She's not surprised when Peter is the first one to look away, but she is surprised to meet Ned's knowing and smiling face a few seconds later. She pinches her lips and averts her eyes, a little embarrassed without really knowing why.

Finally they make it to the right station, and MJ relishes in breathing the kind of polluted air of the city instead of the damp, suffocating one of the subway. Mr Harrington hurries them to the Eiffel Tower and they barely have time to take in the scenery before they're rushed into security, then a line, a first lift, then a second one, and then they're there. And it's stunning.

It's not as crowded as she thought it would be. She leans into the railing and watches as the French capital stretches as far as the eye can see. She feels Peter stop next to her, and her heart jumps in her chest. She glances at him, and somehow he's very pale, paler than she's ever seen him. If she didn't know better she'd wonder if he's afraid of heights of something.

"Feeling brainwashed yet?" she asks with a smirk, and he actually chuckles at that.

"I don't see a difference," he grins, "but that's kinda the thing though, isn't it? We're not supposed to feel it right?"

"Yeah probably," she admits, and they smile at each other for a second before both looking away at the same time. MJ is very aware of everything at that moment. The wind in her hair, the people walking around her, talking excitedly about the view and taking pictures, the sounds of the city at their feet, the sun in the sky playing hide and seek behind the white clouds. The warmth she's probably imagining emanating from Peter next to her, a warmth she doesn't think she could possibly feel because he's standing too far from her, and yet it's like it's engulfing her, cozy and soothing, and she kind of wants to stay like this forever.

They stand in a comfortable silence for a little while, and when she opens her mouth to say something, he does so at the same time.

"This is really–"

"MJ can I–"

She pinches her lips in amusement and nods to him. "You first."

He chuckles nervously, rubbing the back of his neck, and a stupid surge of affection for him washes over her like a wave. He stammers a little, then shakes his head and takes a deep breath. She can feel her heart pounding in her chest, and she wonders if it's the same for him. It's like her body knows before she even does. "MJ I um, can I... can I talk to you? I mean, alone?"

She thought she had spent enough time imagining this moment to not be surprised if/when it comes around, or at least to know how to react. Obviously that's not the case at all. She cannot even begin to form one single coherent thought that isn't along the line of 'oh my god oh my god oh my god'. She's pretty sure her heart's gone into cardiac arrest, and she has to subtly grip the railing to keep herself grounded because it almost feels like she's falling.

She's not though. She's standing at the top of the Eiffel Tower with Peter Parker who's asking her if he can talk to her alone. That's alright. She's alright. She's not falling at all. That's not falling at all.

That's living.

She can do this. It might be a little scary, but it's also what she wants.

Hopefully Peter doesn't realize how all over the place she feels right now. Everything is fine, she's just casually talking with him. She can do this.

"Sure," she shrugs, and she's very impressed with herself for how normal she sounds. She doesn't feel normal at all. Actually, she doesn't think she's ever been that freaked out in her entire life before. Half of her wants to run away, far far away actually, but no, she's too much of a goner for that, she's even quoting Star Wars in her own head, so that's a lot to say. There's no way back from that.

Peter Parker made his way into her life at the start of this trip when he asked her if she wanted to sit next to him on the plane, and now she cannot – and doesn't want to in any case – get back to her life before that.

And that's definitely okay.

:D