my mom is in the hospital. the last thing she said to me was a spiteful suicide threat. i have no idea what i'm writing. i can't sleep. i feel like shit. i have no idea what i am doing. i spent needless hours researching needless things. it is 1 am
Resentment and energy curled along the inside of the stone walls slithering, writhing, all around the inside of the stone castle. Jin Ling really had just been running to get away but also hearing the rumors in town had piqued his curiosity.
If he came back having slain something that would ease the tensions of the inevitable reunion had been one of his thoughts. The other was that the further he got to it the structure and once inside was a feeling circling in his head. One that said, "Yes this is where I need to be."
Something must be wrong with him because his body is shaking. "Fairy? Fairy, where are you?"
He's shivering. His teeth won't stop clattering and his hands ache like they're swollen. The joints ache when he moved them even slightly. It's loud. It's so loud and he can't focus. "Fairy! Fairy something is wrong here."
He's trying to move out but he's struggling because there is a pain. A loud and shattering pain forcing him to the ground gasping and slinking from the dark is a hollow-eyed bear. In the other end, he sees the large panther slipping in the shadows. All of them are thin things. Thin empty things drooling.
Jin Ling tries to move but that pain and fear. He feels bloated and the shivering won't stop and his mouth is rattling so much he tastes blood.
Blood.
Blood…
His nails push out of the bed of skin as thicker claws push out and the clothes, he's wearing are too tight. He can't breathe in this! The itch in his skin as tries to worm his way out of the cold sweat slopping down his body as he sees more animals curling out of the dark.
Eyes blown.
"So young. And yet so plump and ripe."
Shaking
Rattling
Everything in him feels wrong and he can't think.
"New meat"
Jin Ling tastes blood and a roiling turn of hunger in the pit of his belly. His mind growing foggy as he struggles to focus past the fear, the hunger, and the pain turning in his marrow.
"Oh my, this is unexpected." He catches as his vision turns spotty. The voice is familiar but he can't place it, "Well I am not one to turn down a gift when it presents itself."
There's a pressure on his chest. Jin Ling keeps trying to focus and see but among the darkness and coupled with the pain it's all just black spots and uncertainty. But he knows there is an agonizing hell that blazes through as something slides into his chest.
Blood. There's more blood pouring but now it's not in his mouth. It's on his shirt and- and-
Jin Ling's body swelled and shifted on the floor as golden fur sprouted thick and the wound closed to form new muscle. The body expanding and cracking with a sizzle as the flesh bubbled and popped into a new form. Those delicate hands that held a bow with skill thick and awkward paws and those teeth large and ferocious.
A Shishi… Well, fates do fond themselves to have a sense of irony. Nei Huaisang wiped the blood away from his saber. When his little spies told him of what was happening it seemed like a good opportunity to claim another piece on the board. Besides, he served Jin Guangyao, and having Jin Ling under his influence was really just a little middleman in between it all. Nothing against his rules.
Besides, if it was so important than he should have claimed Jin Ling sooner. "Not like I'll keep him longer than I have to. Just enough to push things along further. "
Nei Huaisang really never expected this. For all Jin Guangyao's snake venom and treachery, he did seem to love Jin Ling. He cared. He saw enough and heard enough of the madness running in that head to know he had a good future planned for Jin Ling.
Or at least a good in the eyes of someone who fancied themselves a god.
He can't imagine this was part of that grand plan. Well, an element of chaos is an inherently needed part of anything one makes a road map for because something inevitably must go wrong. How much and how destructive depends on the flexibility of the one writing the map.
The beasts inside looked at him eagerly. "Back in your corners. Back. You do not eat this one."
Ah, it would be such a headache to have to fix this. A waste of his time really because then he'll have to stand around and pretend he cares how they reconstruct everything when he could just simply leave it to trusted disciples and be at peace.
"And I had a new collection of poems I wanted to read as well. Oh, Jin Ling, you are always such a pain even if you are adorable." He set his hand along the furred chest muttering his orders and instructions.
Telling Jin Ling what he needed and wanted him to do to further push along Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji. He hears talking in the distance and the voice and tone strike a familiar chord. Ah, time to hide already. That black dog of Jin Ling's barking at him as he Nei Huaisang waves his fan telling them to shoo.
"Come now. Shoo. Shoo!" In response, the thing tries to bite him and he's forced to retreat in full. It's only once he's gone he realizes he dropped his fan. "Aww, and that was my favorite too."
Come now, I am much more mature then to get mad over a lost fan.
Who is he even kidding? Petty or not he wants to get even with that dog for this.
But he keeps walking and focuses on preparing to potentially see an old friend. "Being a mastermind in the background is far too tiring how does Meng Yao do it?"
So rumors of a man-eating castle sure were interesting and the walking corpses that fled at the sight of Wei Wuxian and the maze array truly piqued his interest. Then there was Jin Ling's do being there to which Wei Wuxian said and quote:
No. No. No. No no no no! Fuck No.
And lastly, a profound world-altering statement of.
No.
But out of familial love and because it's what they have to do they find the stone castle and don't throw the dog off the nearest cliff. Yes, Jin Ling will be upset if the dog disappears but also that's one less horrifying dog in Wei Wuxian's life.
Trauma is a two-way street here.
Now, of course, they don't do anything and they do find the entrance blown open in the nearly seamless walls of the stone castles. No Jin Ling still though. Even with the noise of yelling spirits wailing endless noise as they enter there isn't trace of Jin Ling. But in the corners, Wei Wuxian spots them.
Beasts. Large ferocious animals that are skin and bone that look at them with hungry eyes and open mouths. Yet, do not strike. Not them. They strike each other and wounds litter the bodies showing a constant battle. Blood drips on the ground and coffins line and present themselves filled with sabers, not bodies.
Wei Wuxian certainly has questions about that but also where is Jin Ling? Why is the boy not here? "Jin Ling couldn't have gone far otherwise his dog wouldn't be here. So where is he?"
It's not a big space. Not at all so he must be somewhere. In the corner to his surprise is a Shishi laying on its side and missing the trademark ball or cub. An unorthodox position especially all considering, "Who puts a Shishi indoors? Lan Zhan, can you see anything about it?"
He stopped Lan Wangji as he pulled out his guqin, "Not with that. Can you tell if they're like you?"
"How?"
Wei Wuxian blinked because it seemed absurd to him that Lan Wangji wouldn't have figured out how to see it. The only reason he isn't doing it himself is he lacks all the resentment and power he'd built and harnessed in his old body that would let him read the flows of qi and see where and how cultivation was developing. It came with the changes as naturally as breathing. It came as anything that is how the world functions and operates should.
"You really can't just see it? Truly?"
Lan Wangji looks at him, eyes narrowed. "And what is it I should be seeing Mo-Gongzi? I asked for your help only because you told me you in particular had knowledge about this."
Unspoken was the phrase, 'That's the only reason I have tolerated you" on Lan Wangji's lips as he stared.
"Gosh. This will be hard to explain," Wei Wuxian cupped his chin, "I mean it's very similar to how all the spirits in here are yelling. How it's noisy. The spiritual noise is loud because I am looking at it from an angle of resentment. You should be able to see the qi and the state of cultivation in creatures if you concentrate. It's like… I guess the best way to say a smoke that pours from them."
"Like an aura but not quite. More a way to tell how much power is being burned and given off in the core. It's not something people who are still fully human can see though. It's a sight you pick up in the in-between."
Wei Wuxian points at the Shishi and all the other animals in the room, "Now, can you see it? If you focus on them do you catch traces." It's important he can because this was one of the reasons he truly did need to drag Lan Wangji to work with him under a lie.
Lan Wangji's eyes widened the more he gazed, "They glow from within."
"So it is that spell at play."
It still doesn't explain the missing- and then he spots the tattered fabric underneath the Shishi. The discarded bow and the sword that's all too familiar. No. No. No! Wei Wuxian plants a hand and the relief when he realizes the golden metallic glimmer is not solid. There's fur and body heat.
"Jin Ling? Jin Ling look at me. Jin Ling if you can remember anything please let me know."
The Shishi gives a groan when Wei Wuxian lifts his head up. "Jin Ling?" He's not responsive- they're not. "Help me get him out. Now."
And while he doesn't mean for it to be an order it is, so near instantly Lan Wangji is helping him take Jin Ling down the mountain to an inn. Something trips him along the way, an ornate fan of clearly fine craftsmanship.
Interesting.
Once in the inn with proper lighting, he can take in the thick golden and copper mane and the large paws. It had been hard to sneak such a large creature inside but they managed and he'd told Lan Wangji he needed to get new robes while he attempted to fix this.
Jin Ling, what happened to you?
On the chest is a small mark black and red staining the beauty of the Shishi hide. Feeling in and around the core he can tell there is a problem of instability. That the normal growth has been pushed and pulled in what one might call enhancement but really stands out as a corruption. Something has been twisting and hurting the inside of Jin Ling's qi and meridians.
It's not a curse. No this isn't malevolent, but that makes it far worse. To reverse this… Wei Wuxian pulls out the vile of Rabbit blood and hopes it will be enough before clicking his teeth in dismay and drawing his own. The smell making Jin Ling's nose flare but not enough for a frenzy- good. The pattern is drawn as he reaches out focuses and pulls along the energy in Jin Ling's core till he touches that spot. That broken aspect.
He just needs to swallow it. Swallow what's there and Jin Ling will return to normal.
I can't let the transformation complete in there.
As long as it's not finished and Wei Wuxian can pull in that part of Jin Ling's soul he can reverse this.
For now
He pulls and pulls at the hunger and malice sticking along inside the body. He yanks and yanks for it come free before finally something snaps and gives in and unravels.
The black slipping into him just as the body slowly creaks back into a young teen. It stings and rattles inside and this will have consequences later but it will be fine. He just needs to expel it before anything can take root.
It's only seconds later the door opens and Lan Wangji comes holding out a robe. "How?"
"Funny thing about this spell is it's very focused on energy pulling and pushing in the body." Though on Jin Ling's chest that small mark like an old scar bothers him. It's not like the bite mark on his collarbone.
No, that's from Jiang Cheng. This is something else. Though he has a suspicion. "So you extracted the flaw that caused this."
"Yes. And if you're wondering, no I can't do the same to you," Because Wei Wuxian cursed him in the first place. With great care, he redresses his nephew and brushes back a strand of hair. Lan Wangji is staring at him again. "What?"
"You remind me of someone I once knew. I find it very strange."
"Well, given how much you seem to dislike me I guess you must have rather hated them as well."
As always he expects silence. What he gets is something else.
"No."
Lan Wangji you can't just say things like that with such a firm tone. He might get the wrong idea.
In case you are wondering... the Shishi is the name for Lion Dogs or Stone Lions. These while primarily made of stone were at times cast in bronze or iron hence the Wei wondering if this was a statue thing. All of my choices are made for puns and should really tell you what everyone else is if you look at this from a mythology point of way. The biggest pun is overall gonna be NHS and none of you are gonna get it but me