Emma watched as the guy- Robin!- sat down at the bar. He opened his mouth, undoubtedly to order a drink, but then he realized who he was looking at, and the only thing he got out was a faint: "uhh..."
Regina's expression quickly changed from horrified to disgusted as she looked at Robin. She was still standing behind the counter, so her belly wasn't visible.
Emma had the strongest urge to go up there, snatch Regina and then nope the fuck out of there. But it wouldn't look too good if she did that. She couldn't just snatch Regina away right in the middle of her shift. She could end up getting her fired. Emma was unsure of what to do when she saw Regina and Robin look at each other like two animals unsure of whether to attack or flee. There was a moment of silence where it actually looked like Regina was about to loose it and give Robin a piece of her mind, but then she spoke. Her voice was dangerously calm as she said: "Hello, Robin. Long time no see. How's Marian doing these days? I've had the pleasure of meeting her. Several times."
"Uhh..." Robin stuttered.
"I figured you'd had found a different bar to go to, but what do you know," Regina continued completely dryly. "What do you want? To drink?"
"I, uhm..."
"We don't have that," Regina snipped. "I suggest you make up your mind quickly. You only have an hour before we close."
Emma rose from her chair and walked up to the bar. Sat down on one of the tall barstools close to where Robin was sitting. This situation could explode at any given moment, and Emma wanted to be ready for that. She wanted to be close by so she could rescue Regina if that would be required. Or possibly punch Robin in the face. Or both.
"Whiskey," Robin spluttered. "A whiskey."
"Right." Regina turned her head and called into the backroom: "Melania! ¿Puedes venir y darle un whisky a este tipo? Tengo otros clientes."
A tall girl, roughly the same age as Regina but with bleached blonde hair emerged from the backroom. She shot Robin a look, and when he was occupied with his phone, she lowly muttered to Regina: "¿Es ese el gilipollas?"
Robin clearly wasn't that fluent in Spanish. Otherwise he'd probably have picked up on that. Or maybe he was just too stupid to realize that Melania had just insulted him.
"Sí," Regina mumbled just as lowly, and Emma watched as Melania patted her shoulder and said: "No te preocupes, lo manejaré." She turned her attention to Robin and asked rather unfriendly: "whiskey?"
"Yeah," Robin said and looked like he found her to be exceptionally rude.
Meanwhile, Regina took the opportunity to slither away from him. She was almost pressing herself against the long desk as she went, clearly doing whatever she could to keep her bulging belly hidden from his eyes.
"Are you okay?" Emma asked quietly, leaning in and pretending to be the customer Regina was busy with.
"No," Regina said shortly. "This is going to explode sooner rather than later. I can't stay hidden behind the counter all night!"
Unfortunately, she had a point about that. She couldn't stay with her belly out of sight. That was impossible. But right now, there weren't any new customers coming in, so she could linger behind the counter for a little longer. Robin got his whiskey and began sipping from it. Emma immediately hated him. She had done that a long time, but now when she finally added a face to the name, the hate swirling within her became even stronger. She hated everything about him. His dirty blonde hair. His unshaven scruff. The way he sipped whiskey. And the way he looked at Regina and then quickly looked away again as though HE was uncomfortable. Emma grit her teeth not to scream at him. He had absolutely no right to be uncomfortable. He was the one who had acted like a massive asshole. A massive asshole who was still wearing his wedding ring, Emma noted. So he and Marian were still together. How lovely.
Regina shifted behind the bar and looked like she wanted the floor to open up and swallow her whole. Emma reached out and patted her hand. Maybe they could be so exceptionally lucky, Robin would finish his whiskey and get out of here before Regina had to leave her place behind the counter.
But there was no such luck. Of course there wasn't. Another customer stepped in. A woman with greying hair. Emma recognized her from the other nights. She was a regular. And an impatient one too. The kind of customer who always made a fuss if she wasn't served immediately. And unfortunately the kind of customer who always requested 'Roni'. Because she was the waitress who was the quickest to mix a drink. Emma's heart sank when she saw the woman gesture towards Regina from her position in the far corner of the bar. Regina shook her head a little and looked oddly prepared for battle as she stepped out from behind the counter and over to the woman to take her order.
Emma watched as Robin followed Regina's walk from behind the counter and over to the woman in the corner. She observed as his eyes landed on the way her rounded belly pushed her black top out. And then he choked on his whiskey. Completely and utterly. He hacked and spluttered and coughed. So he wasn't a complete idiot. Good to know. Melania threw a napkin across the counter to him so he could mop up his spilled drink, and he did. And Emma noted that his hands seemed to tremble a little. Regina on the other hand was a complete ice queen as she took the woman's usual order. She completely ignored Robin's existence and continued to be a very professional waitress who smiled at her customer and nodded when she asked her something. Then she turned around and walked back up to the counter. She ducked down and found several bottles. Then she began to mix and shake. Her hands were not trembling.
"You're... You're..." Robin was clearly struggling with his words. Emma glared at him.
"What am I, Robin?" Regina asked tiredly as she poured liquid into a glass. She popped a lid on the glass and shook it.
"You're..." he rubbed a hand over his forehead. "Shit!"
Regina send him a look that undoubtedly would have made him go up in flames if she'd had magical abilities. Emma opened her mouth to say something to her, but Regina silenced with her a look and a slight headshake.
"How... How far along are you?!" Robin croaked.
Regina ignored him and continued to mix the drink. When she was done, she elegantly sashayed back to the woman. She gave her the drink accompanied by her usual sweet smile and bubbly comment. One could only admire her grace. Meanwhile, Robin was sitting and shifting on his chair. His eyes kept darting back and forward between Regina and the door, and for each time he glanced at the door, Emma thought less and less of him. But even though running away would be a coward's way out of the pickle, Emma sort of wished that he would. That would be one way to be rid of him. Maybe he would just run away and never he heard from again. What a fucking luxury that would be!
But unfortunately, he was still sitting tight when Regina came back behind the bar. He leaned forward slightly, and Emma didn't like it one bit. It looked like he was trying to intimidate her or something.
"I asked you a question," he hissed. "How far along are you?!"
"I suggest you keep it down!" Emma warned and glared at him. She didn't give two shits about the way he gave her a surprised look suggesting that she was an interfering stranger. She was not, and she was definitely more than willing to play this game!
Regina shot him a look so dangerous, Emma would have run for the hills if she had been in Robin's shoes. "I don't have anything to say to you, Robin," she said coldly. "Absolutely nothing at all. In fact I'm working. So unless you're about to pay for that-" she nodded towards his whiskey. "You don't have any reason to talk to me."
"Any reason-" Robin spluttered again. "It looks to me like I have PLENTY of reason to talk to you! He gestured wildly towards Regina's swelling belly.
"Be careful!" Emma growled in warning.
Robin's head whipped around, and he looked at her. "Sorry, but who exactly are you?!"
"Regina's girlfriend," Emma said simply.
"Girlfriend?!" Robin repeated, now looking as though he was faced with an unbearable challenge. He rubbed a hand over his stubbly cheek and looked back at Regina. "Wait, so you're-"
"I'm WORKING," Regina interrupted. "That's what I am. And I am NOT about to have some ridiculous private confrontation with you at my work, so I suggest you-"
"I am not about to just up and leave!" Robin snapped. "Not when you're walking around all..." he didn't finish the sentence. He just kept staring and staring at Regina's belly as though he was trying to burn a hole in it.
"Fine," Regina said dryly. "Then you'll have to stay until my shift ends in about an hour. You'll get exactly two minutes to say whatever it is you have a sudden urge to say, and then I'm done. Got it?"
Robin didn't seem overly satisfied with that, but he didn't protest. His new strategy was apparently to sit and stare at Regina's swelling belly, and Emma noted that Regina protectively placed a hand on her belly.
"Why don't you find something else to look at?" Emma suggested with ice cold politeness. She wasn't about to get herself kicked out for threatening Robin.
And it actually worked. After having glared at Emma for a moment, and achieving nothing in doing so, Robin turned his attention back to his drink. Emma could see that he had paled considerably since stepping inside the bar, and to her, it looked like he was desperately trying to do the math so to speak.
Emma took a large swig of her sangria. It didn't taste of anything anymore. Maybe because she had lost all interest in drinking it. Her main focus was Regina. She couldn't take her eyes off of her as Regina walked around in the bar and tended to the other customers. She too looked rather pale. Maybe even nauseous. Like she had been in the beginning of this pregnancy. Emma growled quietly. If this rattled her so much, she ended up getting sick... Emma would never forgive Robin!
Regina kept on going, though. Kept mixing and serving drinks. But the smile was gone, and it was obvious that her hands were doing all the work. She looked like she was miles and miles away. Her shoulders were tight. Drawn up to her ears almost. Her jaw was set, and she had a very determined look in her eyes. A look that more than said 'fight me!'. She was ready for battle.
Emma narrowed her eyes as she looked at Robin again. Was that how this was gonna end? With a battle? Well, if that was the case, Robin would be the one to loose that battle! A hundred percent. Seriously, Emma was more than ready to either kick Robin in the teeth or break his nose if he started anything. Who knows, maybe he'd even look better with a broken nose. He gave Emma the "ickies". And not just because he'd been with Regina. It was his energy. She had no problem with picturing him sitting in a bar and hitting on waitresses ten years younger than himself. How old was he even? Thirty two? Thirty three? Definitely older than Regina. By far.
Emma looked away from him. Looked at the place where Regina had been a moment ago. But now she wasn't there anymore. While Emma had been busy glaring at Robin, she had slipped away, and Emma looked around in bewilderment. Until Melania leaned forward and murmured: "baño".
"Right. Got it. Thanks," Emma said, hastily standing from the tall barstool and slipping behind the counter and through the door that lead to the staff's bathroom. Normally, the guests weren't allowed back here, but Emma chose to believe that she would meet no one with authority to kick her out. And if she did, there was a fair chance she would resist it. Right now her main focus was to find Regina.
It didn't take long before she was standing in front of the door to the staff's bathroom. She knocked gently on the door once.
"¡Saldré en un minuto!"
"It's just me, honey," Emma said softly. "Can I come in?"
The locked clicked once, and Emma wiggled inside the tiny bathroom. Regina was standing in front of the sink. Dry-eyed and with her eyes tightly closed as though she was trying to poof herself away from the bathroom and the bar. And Robin. She looked up and glanced at Emma in the mirror. "I don't think you're supposed to be in here, querida."
"You know me. I'm a rebel," Emma said lightly. She was hoping that the lame joke could make Regina chuckle, but tonight she didn't even manage to knock a smile off Regina. She didn't look like she was about to cry. She just looked...done. Drained. "Are you okay?" Emma asked gently.
"Do I look okay to you?!" Regina snapped.
Emma recoiled at the sudden harshness and took a step backwards as though Regina was a scared animal.
"Oh god, I'm sorry!" Regina said and cupped a hand over her mouth. "Emma, I'm-I'm- I'm sorry! I shouldn't have snapped at you! Will you accept my apology?"
"Depends on how you're delivering it," Emma joked and opened her arms. "Come here, honey."
Regina released a deep sigh as she willingly stepped closer. Emma immediately enveloped the younger woman in her arms. Held her tight without saying anything.
"Of all the bars in all of Madrid..." Regina mumbled a bit muddled against Emma's shoulder. "Why does he choose to come into mine?!"
"I don't know," Emma said gently and rubbed Regina's back in slow circles. "Maybe he didn't think you'd be here? Maybe he's been here while you've been in Storybrooke?" she hugged Regina as tightly as she could without squashing her belly. "But it doesn't really matter, does it? The bottom line is that he's here and that he's upsetting you."
Regina laughed grimly. "I'm not upset. I'm pissed! He looks at me like he's EMBARASSED. Like I'm some kind of... puta."
"Okay, I know what that means, and I will not have you call yourself that!" Emma growled. "Nor will I let him look at you like that! I swear to god, I'll punch him in the face before he gets the chance to-"
"You're good at that," Regina interrupted and chuckled. "I saw you punch Neal in the face."
"You sure did. And I won't be above doing the same to Robin," Emma assured. "I'm sure it'll feel just as good."
"I'm sure it will," Regina croaked out another laugh but then grew serious again as she said: "have you noticed that he hasn't called me by name at all? I'm telling you, he can't remember my name."
Emma made another growling sound. She had in fact noticed that Robin hadn't once used Regina's name when he had spoken to her.
"Why am I so unlucky?" Regina groaned with her forehead pressed against Emma's shoulder. "First my mother walking in and finding the prenatal vitamins and now Robin walking into the bar where I'm working! Why am I always going through some kind of streak of bad luck?!"
"I don't know, honey," Emma said softly and rubbed Regina's back again. "It isn't fair." And it really, really wasn't. It was so utterly unfair that fate seemed to be targeting Regina again and again.
"Urgh, I feel sorry for myself," Regina acknowledged with a slight sight and rolled her eyes as she lifted her head from Emma's shoulder. "And I had promised myself to be a big girl about this..." she cleared her throat, walked over to the mirror where she gave herself a throughout inspection. She fluffed up her hair and reached within the little clutch she'd brought with her into the bathroom. She fished a lipstick out of the clutch and applied more of that red shade to her lips.
"You look awesome," Emma told her.
Regina smiled but then deflated. "I don't feel awesome."
"I know you don't, but you are. Lipstick or no lipstick. He can't bring you down!"
"At least not unless I let him," Regina meekly joked. "And lets be honest... in my fragile state, that could easily happen."
"My offer about punching him in the nose still stands."
Now Regina chuckled as she slipped the lipstick back in the clutch. Then she gave her swelling belly something that couldn't be anything but a fond caress. "You know what, kid? I don't think he was pleased to see you..."
Emma couldn't help but laugh. Because that was obviously what Regina wanted her to do, but also because she found that to be so incredibly cute. Regina rubbing her belly and calling the baby 'kid'.
Regina sighed and straightened her posture as she glanced back towards the door. "Do you think that there's any chance he'll be gone when I come back?"
"Honestly? Not really," Emma said softly. "But say the word and I'll grab him by the collar and throw him out on the street..."
Regina chuckled warmly once more. "No, querida. No, I think it's better that he and I say what needs to be said. I have a couple of things I'd like to tell him, and I can imagine he feels the same way..." she rubbed her belly again. "Two minutes. That's all he gets."
"Two minutes," Emma nodded.
Regina tilted her head and looked at Emma with her big, cocoa-colored eyes. "You'll stay though, right? I don't think I want to be alone with him-"
"The hell are you talking about," Emma interrupted and practically huffed. "Of course I'll fucking stay!"
"Good."
Now Emma was the one to tilt her head. "Did you think that I was planning on waiting outside or something?"
"Not really," Regina said quickly. "But I realize how uncomfortable this must be for you too, querida."
Emma scoffed. "I daresay it's more uncomfortable for you, Regina. Don't you worry about me. I'll be fine. I'm just worried about YOU..."
"I can handle Robin," Regina said firmly and joked: "rather him than his wife, right?"
"Nope, still not a fan of her either," Emma said tightly and winced as the image of Marian slapping Regina across the face popped up in her head.
As though she knew what Emma was thinking about, Regina absentmindedly rubbed her cheek. "Well, I better get back. My break is over. Well, technically it ended two minutes ago, but..."
"You ready to get out of here?" Emma asked softly.
"No. But I can't very well stay in the bathroom forever," Regina dryly replied. "Come on..."
They left the bathroom and headed back into the bar. Unfortunately, Robin was still sitting on the barstool where they left him. Someone had graced him with a second whiskey, and he was glaring a bit at them. Like he was afraid that Regina would have snuck out of the back. Which Regina never would have done. She wasn't a coward like Robin. She continued to ignore him completely as she tended to the other customers who had come in in the meantime.
Emma sat down in the chair next to Robin. Just to keep an eye on him. He clearly had a hard time keeping his eyes to himself. He kept staring at Regina. Staring at her belly. With a rather frantic look in his eyes. Emma scoffed quietly into her sangria. Maybe the douchebag was trying to convince himself that this couldn't be happening. That was completely innocent and had no part of at all. Well, guess what, buddy? You had, Emma thought to herself. Robin wasn't paying much attention to her. He was far busier staring at Regina, so Emma pretty much had free rein to observe him. He was actually a pretty tough nut to crack. Or maybe he was simply too dumb to form any thoughts. Why was he even here? Shouldn't he be home playing devoted husband to his wife? And picture perfect daddy to his child?
Emma suddenly felt a little sick upon remembering that Robin actually had a child. An adorable child, according to Regina. A boy. A little brown-eyed boy with curls. Before she could stop herself, Emma imagined Regina with a brown-eyed, curly-haired child. Boy or girl? She wasn't sure. And before she could make up her mind about it, she reminded herself of what was real and what wasn't. It wouldn't be Regina's child. It would be Alessandra and Sofía's child. Of course. That was how it was supposed to be. Emma had just gotten sidetracked there for a moment. That was all. It was no big deal. She took another sip of her sangria and winced a little bit. It had become a bit... dull. Not that much taste in it anymore. But she had no intention of ordering one more. She'd already had two, and she wasn't interested in getting drunk. Unlike Robin. He was taking large swigs of his whiskey. Maybe he was hoping to get completely shit-faced before talking to Regina. Emma couldn't decide whether that was a good or bad thing. Would he be less of an asshole if he was drunk?
Emma glanced back at Regina. She shook her head a little and rolled her eyes. Of course. She had seen Robin drunk before, and she clearly wasn't impressed at all. Her hand wandered up and settled on her belly again. She clearly didn't like the way Robin was staring at it. And Robin didn't like seeing her touching her belly. Emma saw how he cringed, and she was immediately overwhelmed with a persistent urge to punch him in the face. She had to look away from him...
One hour later, the bar closed, leaving Regina with the job of shutting it down for the night. Wiping the tables and counter down. Putting away the glasses and sweeping the floor if required.
Emma sat tight and waited as the other bar-guests slowly got up and left. Robin followed her example. He wasn't drinking whiskey anymore. Instead he was sitting leaned back on the barstool with his arms folded across his chest. Like a bored teenager. Emma could have murdered him right on the spot.
Regina kept on being professional as she said goodnight to the guests leaving. She called a taxi for one or two of them, that was all routine, but as soon as the last guest had left closed the door behind him, her attitude changed from sweet and professional to fight-mode. She left her spot behind the bar, came round it and folded her arms across her chest as she looked at Robin. Somehow the gesture only made her belly seem even more round and prominent. "So," she said and raised an eyebrow. "Is there something you'd like to say now? You've got two minutes. It's late and I'm tired."
"You're PREGNANT!" Robin spluttered.
Emma released a long sigh and turned her eyes to the ceiling. Of all the things in all the world, this was what Robin chose to go with.
"Am I?" Regina said, voice dripping with sarcasm. "Gosh, I never would have noticed if you hadn't told me. Congratulations. Your vision works perfectly."
Emma suffocated her amusement. That was her girl right there. All sassy and perfect.
"But- I... how?!" Robin kept spluttering and rubbed his unshaven jaw roughly.
"Seriously?" Emma scoffed.
"Well, jeez, Robin," Regina said irritated. "We had sex. I got pregnant. You do know biology, right? Or do I have to explain how things works?"
"But you were on the pill!" Robin protested, cheeks coloring with anger as Regina openly insulted his intelligence.
Regina raised an eyebrow. "Was I really? Did you actually ask me that? Because I don't think you did..."
Robin said nothing. He had definitely NOT asked Regina whether she was on the pill or not.
"Nice job, buddy," Emma interjected with a roll of her eyes.
Robin's head whipped around, and his blue eyes narrowed as he looked at Emma. "I don't think I caught your name?"
"That's because I didn't give it," Emma told him. "Emma. Emma Swan."
"Emma Swan," Robin repeated. "And do you mind explaining to me why you're a part of this? Seeing that your 'girlfriend' cheated on you."
"I met Regina after the whole thing with you happened, you son of a-" Emma stopped herself before she ended up calling him something really rude. "So no, Regina has NOT cheated on me. At all. Because she's not at all like you..."
Robin ignored that and looked back at Regina. "Regina?" he repeated. "But your name is Roni. You told me so!"
"No," Regina sighed. "You read that off the nametag I was wearing that night. But as we started chatting, I actually told you that Roni is a pet name, and that Regina is my real name. I'm surprised you can't remember it since you said it a lot that night..."
"Okay!" Robin snapped. "So I might have forgotten some details, alright? I was drunk. And so were you!"
"Have you heard me deny that I was?" Regina said plainly.
Robin's jaw opened and closed, but he didn't say anything.
Regina laughed humorlessly. "You were too drunk to remember my name afterwards, and yet you seem to clearly remember me telling you that I was on birth control!" she shook her head and made her dark curls bounce. "I mean, come on, Robin, why do you think I told you to wear a fucking condom?!" she shook her head again. "I get your surprise. Believe me, I do. I was as surprised as you are when I found out. I was under the impression that condoms were pretty safe, but I guess it must have leaked or ruptured or whatever..."
Robin's paleness had suddenly reached a state where Emma could have been concerned about him, had he been less of an asshole. He rubbed a hand over his unshaven jaw again. "The condom..." he said weakly.
"Yes?" Regina said tightly. "What about it, Robin?"
He looked anywhere but at her. Clearly had trouble with looking her in the eyes.
"What about the condom, Robin?" Regina snapped and her eyes flashed dangerously. "Is this the part where you tell me that you felt it break but chose to do nothing or-"
"I wasn't wearing one," Robin interrupted. He was ash-faced and still looking at the table.
Emma opened her mouth to say something loud and fast, but she wasn't capable of forming words right now. Her mind went totally blank as she watched Regina sway slightly and then grab on to the edge of the bar desk. "W-what?" she said. Almost whispering at first, but then her voice grew in volume. "What?!" she snapped. "But I ASKED you to wear a condom!"
"I didn't have one on me at the time, damnit!" Robin exclaimed and threw his hands in the air, knocking over his glass of whiskey in the process. "And I probably would have been too drunk to put it on anyway!"
"So instead you pretended?!" Regina bellowed. "You tricked me into having unprotected sex?!"
"I thought you were on birth control!"
"So, why the hell didn't it occur to you to actually ASK me instead of just assuming?!"
"I don't know!" Robin snapped. "I wasn't thinking, okay!"
"At least not with your head," Emma interrupted and glared furiously at Robin. "God, you are such an asshole!"
Before Robin could get the chance to say something for himself, Regina cut him off by asking: "are you clean? Or should I be worrying about sexual transmitted diseases on top everything else?!"
"I'm clean!" Robin snapped.
"How long has it been since you were tested?" Regina continued tonelessly.
"I get tested regularly!" Robin hissed.
"Well, thank god for that," Regina said sardonically. "Nice to see that you at least take some sort of responsibility-"
"What about you?!" Robin interrupted and glared at Regina. "Anything I need to worry about? I mean, I doubt it's the first time you've-"
"I would strongly suggest you don't finish that sentence, buddy!" Emma interrupted and stood from the barstool. Her hands had curled into fists, and she was more than prepared to send Robin flying across the room.
"I get tested regularly too," Regina said almost sweetly. "You've got nothing to worry about."
"Apart from the obvious, you mean!" Robin said and glared at Regina's swelling belly.
Regina's hand immediately flew up to protectively rest on the bump. "That's not something you need to worry about either."
Robin scoffed as he glanced from Regina to Emma. "So what, you're gonna play happy family or something?" before either of them could get the chance to answer that, he continued: "why didn't you just... you know..." he rubbed his jaw harshly once more. "There are ways to deal with these kind of things! You could have-"
"¿Me estás tomando el pelo?!" Regina exclaimed, almost shrieking.
Both Emma and Robin recoiled. Emma because what Robin had said was completely outrageous, and Robin most likely because Regina was yelling.
"Wow," Emma said dryly and felt her jaw tighten as she looked at Robin. "You're a real Robin Hood, aren't you?"
Robin didn't react to that. He kept looking at Regina as he said: "so, exactly what is your plan? I have a family, you know! A code I live by, and I have no intention of breaking that code-"
"As I said, a real Robin Hood," Emma said tightly and felt a bizarre urge to laugh because Robin was so utterly ridiculous.
"And where was that code when you slept with me?" Regina asked dully. "When you said you were using a condom when you actually weren't?"
Robin opened and closed his mouth repeatedly, but didn't say anything.
"Yes, I'm well aware you have a wife," Regina continued, still completely dully. "I've met her. Several times. Lovely woman. I was especially fond of her when she smacked me in the face!"
"You're gonna raise this child on your own then?" Robin continued, ignoring Regina's remark. "MY child..."
"No," Regina said. "The baby will be raised by a perfectly wonderful couple with plenty of love to give and all that it takes to care for a child."
Emma could have sworn she saw the hand on Regina's belly trembling a little.
"You're giving it up?" Robin said, eyebrows raising towards his hairline, and arms folding across his chest.
"I'm giving the baby its best chance at having a happy, carefree life!" Regina hissed. "With parents who can provide for him or her in every way possible. That does sound like a very good decision, doesn't it?"
Robin opened and closed her mouth, but nothing happened. After a moment, he regained the ability to speak. "Maybe the child could... I don't know-" he interrupted himself and drummed his fingers against the desk. "Maybe it could-"
"What?" Regina sneered. "Stay with you and Marian? Is that what you're about to suggest?"
"Well, it's my child too, isn't it?" Robin snapped. "And one family can be just as good as another, can't it?! I mean, if the child stays with me, it would at least be with its father-"
"You have GOT to be fucking kidding me!" Emma hissed.
"What she said," Regina dryly nodded. "If you think that I would let this baby stay with a woman unhinged enough to stalk a girl, or a man so 'family-orientated' he has little qualms with 'forgetting' that he has a wife and son back home just because he'd rather hit on a waitress, and furthermore trick someone into having unprotected sex... Then you have another thing coming!" she took another step towards Robin, eyes blazing, and chest puffed up. "You will never come anywhere near this baby! Not as long as I'm around!" she took a shaky breath. "And your two minutes were up a minute ago. Now get out of here and leave me alone!"
"Fine!" Robin bellowed and stood from the barstool so suddenly, it ended up on the floor with a loud bang. "Do as you please!" he half-yelled, clearly getting angry now that Regina had rejected his 'generous' offer. "But don't ever be a bother to me or my wife!"
"The only one who has been a bother is your wife!" Emma interjected. "She's the one who's being acting like a crazy stalker!"
Robin ignored that and kept looking at Regina. Sneering and jaw tightening when looking at Regina's swelling belly. "I should take this further," he groused. "Your claim isn't worth much! I saw you that night! You were flirting with other customers too! Who knows, maybe you made a mistake, or something! That baby probably isn't even mine! Maybe you just have trouble remembering who you slept wi-"
"¡MALDITO GILIPOLLAS!" Regina yelled, and suddenly things were happening very quickly. One minute Robin was standing and spewing venom at Regina, and the next he was interrupted by a sharp and loud almost cracking sound. He stumbled backwards while grabbing his right cheek. That was when it occurred to Emma that Regina had just slapped him across the face. Hard.
"What the hell is wrong with you?!" Robin bellowed, taking a step towards Regina, and towering above her. He was at least a head taller than she was. "You insane little-"
"Hey!" Emma hissed, immediately placing herself between Regina and Robin and poking said asshole hard in the chest with the tip of her index finger. "You back off right now, buddy! You're threatening a pregnant woman right now, and that's usually the kind of stuff that makes people call the police. And right now, I'm people, so..." Emma let the rest of the sentence hang in the air. She wasn't the least bit afraid of Robin. And being the daughter of a sheriff, her dad had insisted that she took self-defense lessons. Right now those lessons came in handy. Always aim for the eye-socket or crotch. Heel palm strike. Good to aim at either the nose or throat. Never underestimate the power of a solid elbow in the ribs. Yes, Emma was fully prepared to physically fight this asshole if she needed to. She glared at Robin. He glared back. Neither of them said anything. Emma's pose radiated 'what's it gonna be?', while Robin held onto his anger. At least for another ten seconds or so. The message and threat about the police seemingly went through loud and clear. He turned around and marched out of the bar with obnoxiously and unnecessarily loud footsteps. The glass in the door rattled as he slammed it shut behind him.
"Congratulations, you made the right choice," Emma growled loudly and turned around.
Regina was still standing behind her. Her face looked like it had been drained of color and she was clutching a beer bottle in her right hand. She too had been ready to attack, it would seem. Emma felt sick when thinking about if this had happened when Regina was alone in the bar...
"Well, that was ugly," Regina said hoarsely. Her bottom lip trembled slightly.
"Yeah," Emma nodded and looked at the bottle in Regina's hand. "You wanna put that down now?"
"Oh," Regina said a bit surprised. "Yeah, sure." She dumped the empty bottle on the desk. "I pretty much just went for the first thing I could find."
Emma gently grasped Regina's elbows. She didn't like the ghostly white color in Regina's cheeks one bit. "Sit," she said half-sternly as she guided Regina to the nearest chair.
"I'm fine."
"I believe you. Now sit."
Regina sat down and released the whoosh of air Emma suspected she had been holding for far too long. "Well, that was baby daddy," she said dryly. "Charming man, isn't he?"
"That is not even funny," Emma growled.
"No, it's not," Regina quietly agreed. "We had unprotected sex. I told him to wear a condom and he didn't. And I was too drunk to pick up on it..."
"That is so not the main issue here at all!" Emma said firmly. "You asked him to wear a condom and he didn't and tricked you into believing that he had. THAT'S the issue, and absolutely nothing else!"
Regina looked at the table in front of her. "I was not flirting with any other customers that night," she whispered and when she looked up her eyes were glistening with unshed tears. "That's not how I am at all! I was flirting with him because he flirted with me! That's what happened-"
"Regina, stop," Emma said softly and grasped her chin. "He was just spewing venom. I KNOW the real story, okay? You don't have to explain anything to me."
"Why didn't he just ask me if I was on birth control?!" Regina said exasperated. "Maybe he was drunk, but not THAT drunk for Christ's sake! He could have put two and two together and figured out that there was a risk of knocking me up when he didn't use protection!" she pressed a palm against a forehead. "And WHY was he so good at making it sound like this was all my fault?!" she sighed deeply. "Always the villain. Even when I'm not." She scolded her features into something that was supposed to be a smile. "But at least I got the chance to slap him in the face. I've fantasized about that many times."
"It was a damn good slap," Emma praised and chuckled softly. "Did it feel good?"
"Not as good as I had hoped," Regina sighed, fingers circling her growing belly. "I hope that this won't be a problem. The thing he said about wanting the baby to live with him..."
"That was just an idiotic guy's half-assed attempt at owning up to his responsibility," Emma said quickly. "You could literally see that he didn't mean any of it. So much for his 'code'!" Emma had her own ideas about where Robin could stick that code!
Regina nodded a bit and glanced out of the window. "You don't suppose... You don't think he could still be out there, right?"
"No!" Emma said quickly and firmly. "I heard tires squealing after he'd left. Believe me, he's gone." But what if he came back? What if he showed up one night when Regina was alone in the bar? No. Emma refused to believe that that was even a possibility.
"You're right," Regina said, interrupting Emma's train of thoughts. "I heard that car too. I'm just being silly." She stood from the chair and attempted to bend down so she could pick up the chair Robin had knocked over, but Emma was faster than her. "Let's get back to your place," she suggested once the chair was taken care of.
"But I have to take care of things here," Regina pointed out. "Wipe the tables, and-"
"I'll do it. Don't move," Emma warned and grinned a little when she finally managed to coax a little smile out of Regina.
Regina didn't move an inch as Emma 'flew around' in the bar like an effective little tornado. She wiped the tables, swept the floors and scrubbed the glasses.
"Now I feel guilty," Regina said. "You're literally doing my job, querida."
"Yep, and I'm happy to do it too," Emma smiled. "You had a rough night. You deserve a break."
Regina smiled for a split second but then her expression grew resigned. "I am so sick of causing drama all the time!"
"You didn't cause any drama, beautiful girl. He did."
"Sí, but it was because of me, was it not?" Regina snipped. Her expression softened as she placed a palm on her growing belly. "And because of this. It all comes down to Blueberry."
Emma abandoned the last glass she had been in the middle of cleaning. She walked over to Regina and cupped her cheeks. "You've just defended Blueberry like a motherfucking badass!" she said it because she knew it would make Regina laugh, and it did, but Emma was much more busy thinking about what Regina had said to Robin. 'You will never come anywhere near this baby! Not as long as I'm around!'. Yes, it was said in the heat of the moment, no doubt of it, but... it was spoken like a... Like a mother. There was no other way to describe it, really. Emma swallowed hard and quickly smiled at Regina to hide what was going on in her mind.
"Should we head back now?" Regina asked softly. "This place looks pretty spotless to me."
"Yeah, let's call it a night," Emma nodded. "I think we could both need to crash."
"And I have a very hot date with a bag of chips," Regina joked.
"Oh? That so?" Emma chuckled as she draped an arm around Regina. "Can I be a part of that too?"
"Sure," Regina half-laughed. "I'm sure the chips won't get jealous."
"Happy to hear it, beautiful girl. Happy to hear it."
Emma and Regina left the bar. Emma had her arm draped around Regina's shoulder. Because it was a cute thing to do, but also because she quickly could pull Regina behind her in case Robin was still lurking outside. He wasn't though. The street were full of happy, slightly drunk people, but Robin was not one of them, and Regina looked pretty relieved once done scanning the crowd. "I must have been more drunk that night than what I first thought," she said and scrunched up her nose. "I mean, what was I even thinking? He was absolutely terrible!"
"We all do slightly weird things when we're drunk," Emma soothed. "Hell, I once gave Neal a lap dance because I had too much tequila... I still think about that a lot."
Regina actually spluttered at that. "You gave him a lap dance?! Seriously?"
"Yep," Emma said gravely. "Afraid so."
Regina laughed heartedly. "Well, I hope he appreciated it. I know I certainly would."
Emma caught the metaphorical ball thrown at her. "If you're really lucky... I might give you one someday."
"Be still my beating heart," Regina groaned. "And my poor, overloaded system."
Emma laughed and gave Regina's shoulder a soft little squeeze. "One day, beautiful girl. But for now... chips?"
"Chips," Regina agreed and jokingly licked her lips.
And back to Regina's apartment they went. Where Regina was reunited with her bag of chips. She propped her feet up, leaned back on the couch and declared that she was 'so over this night'.
Emma silently agreed with her. She too was a hundred percent over Robin Locksley and his unfathomable stupidity.
Regina laughed when Emma told her this. "Wonderfully put, querida," she praised and stuffed a handful of chips inside her mouth.
"Thanks," Emma chuckled, feeling overwhelmed with tenderness as she looked at her girlfriend. On the verge of tears a moment ago, and now happily eating chips like it was nobody's business. Regina bounced back quickly, and thank god for that. But still, Emma hoped that this would be the last time Regina would need to bounce back from anything. And like Regina, she hoped to hell that Robin wouldn't turn out to be a problem in the future...
To Be Continued...
Spanish translations:
Melania! ¿Puedes venir y darle un whisky a este tipo? Tengo otros clientes= Melania! Can you come over and give this guy a whiskey? I have other clients.
¿Es ese el gilipollas?= Is that the asshole?
No te preocupes, lo manejaré= Don't worry, I'll handle it.
Baño= Bathroom.
¡Saldré en un minuto!= I'll be out in a minute!
Puta= Whore.
¿Me estás tomando el pelo?!= Are you kidding me?!
¡MALDITO GILIPOLLAS!= DAMN ASSHOLE!