A/N: Here I am with yet a new chapter! I'm sorry if there are readers who are following other stories of mine and are waiting for updates, but when inspiration strikes, I take advantage of it.

I need to take a second to address you guys on this. I don't know what you were/are expecting of this fic, but it was implied that it was Sasuke/Naruto, Itachi/Sasuke and Naruto/Kiba, so unavoidably these ships (and others) are going to happen, one way or another.

What I mean is, maybe the ending will not lean towards what's been expected from the fic. As many of you might know, I write more driven by the characters than by my plans, so many things change with time and plot. This being said, I think that, if you are reading this because of the Sasuke/Naruto relationship exclusively, you might find yourself frustrated by this story for a while, and I strongly advise you to stop reading.

"Assuming We…" was the second fanfiction I ever wrote, so it's precious to me. I lost my drive towards it because some readers didn't seem to understand where I was headed with it, even though it was kind of obvious from the start. Because of petty demands and negative reviews, I didn't write for over 5 years and almost dropped this story for good.

This isn't so much about ships as it is about emotional awareness. There are controversial themes all around, but all of you already knew that.

The ending may or may not be obvious depending on what you're here for.

At this point, considering how few reviews I have, I believe I'm only writing it for a select few of you, and as long as you guys are reading and liking it for what it is, I am happy.

Please don't leave bad reviews, nor make demands just because things aren't going your way. This fanfiction will go the way I want it to, so if anyone isn't happy about the turn of events, I suggest you stop reading.

For those of you who are enjoying it, thank you for your support and I hope I will be able to surprise you all with how things will unfold.

As always, a huge thank you to you all for reading and for trusting my work! Thank you to Tofukuga from Tumblr who is a constant source of inspiration and keeps my drive going, and to my beautiful beta MistyMi who does such a wonderful job and is so amazingly supportive!

WARNING: ITACHI/SASUKE, SEXUAL SITUATIONS, INCEST. PLEASE DON'T READ IF IT'S NOT YOUR CUP OF TEA!

Chapter Twenty

Sasuke's POV

After the rather conflicting conversation between Itachi and I, the atmosphere had felt lighter, but the tension hadn't eased, which wasn't surprising. We had cleared the air about a few things and had been honest with each other to a hurtful point, which forced us both to be aware of ourselves and of how things had been twisted from the very start.

We had both been playing this game all along, even if subconsciously so, back and forth testing, teasing and forcing the other out of their comfort zone. Before, I had been so adamant in pushing my brother away, thinking that I was trying to accomplish something when, in the end, it had all been a silent call for attention. No matter how disgusted and upset I had been at myself for wanting him like this, I had still wanted him to not only see me, but to see me the same way I saw him. Through my erratic thoughts and feelings, I had still carried a flame of hope inside me that he would want me, too.

I was genuinely frustrated at myself for my actions in regard to Naruto – he didn't deserve it. I should've known myself better, and I should've known Itachi would see right through me and eventually accuse me of using him. Then again, Itachi had been the one to fuel things between us by opening the doors for us so, in his own way, he had been as manipulative as me.

I hadn't lied when I said I was in love with Naruto though, and oddly enough, beside Itachi, this became clearer. I understood how lucky I was to have him - a faithful friend and lover I could rely on, and someone who gave his everything and accepted me without judgement. I wish I could be the type of humble person who would say that he was too good for someone as unbalanced as me, and yet, Naruto had become too precious for me to let go of. I didn't want to lose what I had built with him, of that much I was sure.

The more I thought about it the more I realized I was a terrible person, and greedy in ways I had never considered before all of this.

Was this the true nature of 'love'? Us human beings becoming twisted, selfish and reckless in our hopeless need to be loved and desired unconditionally above everyone else while, in the middle of all of this, allowing ourselves the luxury of being mindlessly possessive?

I had no idea what to or what to expect from my future with either Naruto or Itachi. It wasn't a question of how I felt for either of them or how they felt about me. One would think that with my brother and I sharing the same feelings the choice would be obvious for me, but truth was, we didn't know how to make it work; if it was possible for us to work together like that or even if things would end up getting too messy and fucked up at some point. Clearly it wasn't a sexual attraction issue either, but the walls were set high between us. There was Naruto, age difference issues, moral issues, uncertainty about what the future would look like and Itachi's own stupid and conflicting thoughts on how to deal with me.

All I knew was that not giving it a try with Itachi now was not an option anymore. Even if it didn't last, I would take whatever I could and hope that it wouldn't break us beyond repair.

In the end, the lifelong love I'd had for Itachi as a brother and as a person had been joined by this new emotional and sexual rawness that was breathtaking, and I knew he loved me just as much - if not more - and in other ways I could barely begin to comprehend. Sharing intimacy with him had only managed to open my eyes to something that would not change between us.

Our walk back to the apartment was spent in solemn silence as we found ourselves already surrounded by the colors of the night. We had managed to finish our food back at the coffee shop, so when Itachi asked if I wanted to get anything special for dinner I refused because I was sure I wouldn't be able to eat much for the rest of the day anyway.

Once we were home, Itachi announced that he had some emails to reply to and the script to revise for the next day. I took that as a hint for me to give him some space, so I went to my room to change into some sleeping clothes and text Naruto to tell him everything was okay. I didn't feel like calling him just yet considering all the stuff that had happened already and all the stuff that I had yet to process.

Things had already been heavy and emotional enough for one day, so I did all of this slowly. I didn't want my presence to be overbearing for my brother. I understood that I needed to tread carefully around him to be where he wanted me to be, with him, whatever that was.

To my surprise, though, as I walked inside the living room I found Itachi sitting on the sofa with his laptop over his legs, some papers on the cushions next to his thigh. I noticed he'd already changed his clothes, too, to a black pair of sweatpants and a dark green, tight fitting sweater. His gaze acknowledged my arrival before his eyes rolled down again to the screen.

I observed this relaxed version of him for a while, the casualness in his demeanor and appearance something familiar and heartwarming to me. I wondered how long it had been since I had allowed myself to just look at him without feeling like a horrible person.

"Can I keep you company?" I asked.

"You don't need to ask," my brother said easily as he typed something down.

At his permission, I made my way towards him and sat down on the sofa, crossing my legs Indian style. "You should get a TV," I commented, placing my cellphone on the seat beside me next to his papers. "No normal human being lives without one nowadays."

"I will get one for you if you ever come live with me," he said, imperturbable. "Until then, I am fine with my books and my sound system."

I couldn't help but snort. "You're like an old man," I mocked. Then, I looked down at the papers resting between us, picking them up. It looked like a script. "Is this for the movie you're in?"

"Hm."

I turned the first page of the script and quickly read through the premise. It seemed like a serious story, about yakuza, love, and vengeance, and Itachi played the villain, who also happened to be the main character.

Curious to see what kind of role he was playing; I wasted a few minutes reading through the script.

"'Nao, you betrayed me,'" I recited solemnly while reading a line from a dialogue on page fifteen where Itachi's character murdered the man who had adopted him and taught him everything. "'After everything our family has done for you, after we took you in when your parents threw you away… my son… how could you…'"

"'Don't waste your breath, old man,'" Itachi recited back, his eyes still trained on his laptop, his voice having fallen to a dark, fearsome tone that had me quirking up my eyebrows. He was uttering every single word in the dialogue by heart. "'I will make sure your life's hard work won't go to waste. This family will thrive under my leadership. I will do all the things you were never capable of.'"

He looked at me from the corner of his eye, looking smug. "Keep going."

I flipped a few more pages, skipping ahead. "'Boss, we can't use her,'" I read out loud another random line. "'She's too young, what would the mistress say…'"

"'I don't recall asking for your input, useless vermin,'" Itachi cut, imposingly. "'Keep that insolent attitude and you will wish your punishment were a cut finger.'"

Lowering the script, I made a face at him, torn between awe and envy. "Have you memorized just your part, or do you actually know this whole thing by heart?"

Itachi actually glanced at me again, smiling openly this time. "Care to find out?"

I couldn't help but roll my eyes. I already knew the answer, it was no use making a fool out of myself. "Never mind."

Itachi all but smirked slightly before silently proceeding with whatever it was that he was doing on his laptop. With a sigh, I changed my position so I was laying on my back on the sofa, the top of my head connecting with his thigh, the script over my chest. Looking up at the tall ceiling, I tried to relax. Itachi enjoyed this type of quiet ambience, I thought, and I had gotten used to it from spending time with him, so it didn't bother me. He sometimes had the radio on, which was also nice.

However, it was just the quiet sound of our breathings then and the gentle tap of his fingers on the keyboard and I couldn't help but remember that, just a few hours previously I'd experienced the quickest orgasm of my life in that same place.

Feeling a sudden shiver run through my body I tried to push the memory away and not think how Itachi had gone from an almost innocent kiss to full on throwing himself at me without restraint.

I wondered if I had that much impact on him or if he had just been taken by surprise because it had been our first kiss and we had both wanted it that bad without realizing it.

Even if we had already kissed after that... would he react if I made a move now?

Itachi was always so composed, so calm. Knowing I had made him lose his shit was weirdly fascinating.

I took a deep breath and placed a wrist over my eyes. Moral grounds, he had said. He wanted me to change the way he saw me so we could be on the same level and I didn't know what that meant, neither would he tell me. At this point, he was seeing me as an overly excited kid, impulsive and childish, innocent, but at the same time, he had alluded to seeing me as a man as well, something desirable that he wanted and that made him lose track of himself. These two things clashed in his mind in ways that I couldn't reach, but it was my job to put a stop to it. How, I would have to learn.

Did Itachi want me to be a man, or did he fear that I'd lose that innocence he had so been keen on protecting? I suspected both were probably correct.

Right now, all I knew was that I was pretty emotionally drained. Thinking about Itachi and me forced my body to react without my consent and it only got worse because he was right there.

If it had been Naruto sitting where Itachi was, all I had to do was glance at him a certain way and we'd take care of this matter easily, no second thoughts and no complications.

It was fucking hard being in the same space as Itachi at this point and not wanting something. I could only pray that this was temporary because it was all new - that it wouldn't be like this all the time.

There was no way I was going to openly tell my brother I wanted his attention though, even if I felt that he would notice at some point.

"Were you ever diagnosed with a photographic memory?" I asked, to take my mind off my boner. "When you were being considered this fantastic genius at school and all that."

"I don't think so, no," Itachi replied, sounding thoughtful, and even the way his voice reverberated softly in the room seemed to go straight to the indecent part of my brain. "I think I simply have an ability to retain information well. You do, too."

"Yeah, but I still study my ass off."

"So did I," he refuted easily. I felt a gentle brush of knuckles against my forehead and had to will myself not to shudder. "And I still do. It's not like I look at scripts once and automatically memorize it all, neither do I miraculously know how to approach characters and scenes. It takes studying and method; a lot of research, as well."

That touch that I had once been so fearful to receive felt blissful.

I removed my wrist from my eyes but kept them closed. As if on cue, those same knuckles brushed a delicate path down the curve of my nose, then lower until they stopped at my lips. Instinctively, I kissed them.

"Is it lonely, doing this all by yourself?" I questioned, in a whisper.

Itachi was silent then, but after a few seconds he turned his hand downwards so the fingertips of his index and middle fingers were touching my lips in a feathered-like caress. "I only feel lonely when I think about you," he said, smoothly. "Other than yours, I don't really feel like I lack company in my daily life."

"Hm" I muttered, feeling a pleasant warmth running through my body before parting my lips to languidly mouth at the digits against them for a bit. "You always say these sorts of well-chosen things to cause an impact, don't you?"

"Well-chosen words can be more powerful than reckless actions," he replied. I couldn't see him, but I knew he was watching me. Lightly, his fingers pinched my upper lip playfully. "Although, reckless actions can be irreversibly impactful, too."

I opened my eyes and tilted my head backwards so I could look back into his own observant ones. Unblinkingly, I bit on his middle finger before the tip of my tongue darted out to offer it a small, yet provocative lick.

Itachi's calm face didn't change, but his eyes narrowed down at me. "Someone's in a feisty mood" he noted, as expected, even as his eyes left mine to watch my mouth now, his fingertips rubbing almost sensually against my lips, openly inviting me to do more.

He was obviously aware that I was pushing him, but I couldn't help but wonder why he was indulging my actions and whether his choice of initiating contact had been purely out of innocent affection or if it had been intent on riling me up from the start. Maybe he had known, from something in my voice or my demeanor, that I was already in that certain type of mood. Itachi had always been overly aware of everything I did like that.

"Whose fault do you think that is?" I asked, grabbing his hand with both of mine to keep it in place, one of my thumbs rubbing on the inside of his wrist. "You act all nonchalant but you're teasing me."

Itachi smirked slightly. "Am I now?"

Even as he said this, his middle finger eased its way inside my mouth. That alone did things to me that I couldn't ignore, and all I could do was happily oblige, closing my lips around the digit and sucking, my tongue running wetly, languidly over its length. Beneath my fingertips, goosebumps appeared on the skin of his wrist, letting me know he enjoyed this type of thing.

Slender fingers rested against the sides of my face as he teasingly seemed to thrust his middle one in a curious exploration of the interior of my mouth, the digit rubbing against my tongue as he did so. If I had been uncomfortable before, I knew I was fully hard now, and the fact that he was willingly indulging me wasn't helping.

Itachi's eyes were trained on me, his expression unchangeable, yet his breath was a slightest bit faster than before, which pleased me immensely. By now, I knew this to be a sign of his obvious interest.

I made the finger slide out of my mouth and started to slowly run my tongue across the palm of his hand, that I still held firmly. His pulse quickened.

"Sasuke," Itachi said, his voice even but sinfully low. "Behave yourself."

"I can't," I muttered, nuzzling my nose on the wet spots I had just licked, realizing I sounded needy but not really caring when he was clearly being affected by it.

For a few seconds, there was silence as our eyes locked, and I kept kissing his hand provocatively, Itachi watching without saying a word, but we could both feel that the atmosphere around us had changed, the air having gotten heavier and hotter.

I vaguely wondered what was going through his mind and hoped that he wouldn't push me away after having come this far. After our conversation I still didn't know where we were at and what his boundaries were, what was acceptable in his mind and what wasn't. We had already kissed and orgasmed together, and apparently we had both been more than fine with it but Itachi's mind worked in such strange ways that I hoped it wouldn't be what would hold him back now.

To my elation, Itachi used his free hand to close the lid of his laptop, gently tugging the hand I was holding free from my grasp before picking up the script still resting on top of my chest. Inquisitively, I tilted my head further backwards to see what he was doing and noticed that he was placing both things down on the floor.

Fuck, yes, I thought, knowing I was maybe a little too excited but not really caring.

This was all I needed to turn on my stomach and get on my hands and knees. I didn't need him to say anything because I easily crawled my way on top of him, immediately straddling his legs, and even if that hadn't been his initial idea he allowed it as he leaned back on the sofa, silently watching my every move. I briefly looked down between us and confirmed that I wasn't the only one worked up since there was an obvious hard on tenting his pants. I bit down on my lower lip at the thought, Itachi attentively gauging my expression.

I felt his hands coming to rest on my hips as both of mine clenched around the fabric of the sweater over his chest. We exchanged a meaningful look, his beautiful eyes carefully observant before his chin tilted upwards as I leaned down, our mouths meeting with an acquired ease as I caught his lower lip between my own and sucked it gently. Itachi opened his mouth just the slightest bit as his tongue flicked out to touch my upper lip and I took the chance to gently suck on the alluring tip now before kissing him fully. Briefly, the thought that this was my first time initiating a kiss between us crossed my mind. I wondered if he had noticed it.

It was so unbelievably easy, too.

Careful hands pulled my sweater up until they were touching skin, first at the end of my spine, then appreciatively sliding upwards to feel the contours of my back and I all but released a wanton moan against him, feeling that familiar dizziness clouding my head. It was the first time, to my recollection, that he touched me so directly like that, which made me extra sensitive to him. His hands were soft, yet strong, and he caressed me in a calculated way that I wasn't used to. Wantonly, I arched my body into his touch as those exploring hands moved to my sides, grabbing me a little underneath my armpits. I could tell he was taking in as much as I was, fingertips memorizing every trace of skin they found with such devotion I felt like I was melting.

It didn't seem possible that this felt so stupidly good.

Our tongues slowly slid against each other as I felt Itachi pulling me closer against him, so I uncurled my fingers from the fabric on his chest and put my arms around his neck instead, hugging him and letting my ass drop so I was sitting on his legs. There was a moment when I felt my breath catch as our clothed erections came into contact and our chests were fully pressed against each other. Shamelessly, I released a groan and rolled my hips a bit for some friction, slowly but implicitly. My actions made Itachi inhale deeply through his nose and his fingers curl so his nails were digging possessively on my skin. I had to break the kiss because I couldn't breathe anymore.

Gasping a little, I locked eyes with his inquisitive ones. Itachi seemed to be breathing hard too, and I couldn't help but notice how sensual he looked with his lips wet from kissing.

What a weird thing to think, I considered, vaguely surprised at myself. We had already kissed and touched, rutted together, and just now was I realizing that he looked ridiculously fuckable?

I did not just think that.

That was the person I had fallen so helplessly in love with, and there he was, under me, giving me free access.

I became aware that my hands were shaking, my cheeks unbelievably hot.

My desire for him suffocated me suddenly. I couldn't even take control of my body properly and it was a scary thought.

As if reading my mind, Itachi smiled mischievously, leaning forward to mouth at my neck, effectively making me forget everything to instead close my eyes and relish. God, why was he so good with his mouth?

I blindly felt around his head until I found the band holding his messy ponytail together and, just like a few hours previously, I made it slide from his hair, reopening my eyes to almost drunkenly watching as dark strands cascaded over his shoulders and over my hands.

"Do you have a thing for my hair?" Itachi whispered, a little breathlessly, kissing along my Adam's apple.

"Maybe," I admitted, running the fingers of both hands easily through those beautiful strands, mentally agreeing that the sight was rather fascinating. He did have beautiful hair, strong but sleek, somehow so smooth and fluid when it was loose like this. These were kinks of mine I had never noticed before, but then again, before this I had been so afraid of even thinking about these types of situations with him to consider anything at all.

Letting go of his hair, my hands came down to his waist. I impatiently tugged at his sweater. "Off. Now."

The demand made him quirk an amused eyebrow upwards at me, but he complied, lifting his arms up so I could remove the offending piece of clothing from him and throw it to the side.

Looking at his toned body I felt my mouth watering helplessly and my heartbeat skyrocket. There was something animalistically beautiful in the way his hair fell messily over his chest and contrasted against pale skin - so much so that I became momentarily dazed. I found him so fucking attractive I was rendered speechless.

Looking at him as a lover was completely different from looking at him as a brother, and it was shocking to me how easy it was to go from one concept to the other.

"Are you cold?" I absently asked in a whisper.

"I'm fine," he assured me, his hands on both my thighs now, massaging them firmly in slow back and forth movements, thumbs occasionally sliding over my groins.

Fascinated, I placed both hands on his chest, feeling the firm muscles of his pecks beneath my fingers. Holding my breath, I couldn't resist the urge to brush the tips of my fingers over the pinkish, hard nipples, loving how he allowed himself to sigh gently in pleasure. My eyes hungrily traced every contour of his neckline, the smooth muscles in his arms, his well-defined abs. For a moment, I felt my chest tightening in pure desire and all I wanted was to feel every bit of his body as I could without restraint, yet the thought was somehow intimidating.

"My eyes are up here," Itachi teased softly, making me jolt. His index finger tilted my chin upwards, so I was looking into his eyes instead. "Let me see you, too."

Eyes fixed on mine, there wasn't a trace of a smile on his face now. His hands sneaked under my clothes in a feathered-like touch while they traced a curious path up my chest, warm palms brushing over my own pebbled nipples. The sensation made me hiss as I automatically ventured a new, more insinuating thrust of my hips against him, my fingers tightening around the muscles of his shoulders. Itachi took a sharp intake of breath. I clenched my teeth so as to not moan as I felt a small pinch being delivered to both buds, my cock twitching painfully in the confines of my clothes at that.

With a groan, I removed my own sweatshirt and threw it to the side, feeling my muscles tremble with anticipation and frustration as my heated skin was hit by the mild temperature in the room - a contrast to how hot his hands on me were. I had to take a breath and look away because his eyes, curious and ravenous were on me the whole time, taking in every single thing I did, shamelessly appreciating every bit of me as I had done to him, as if my body was the most fascinating thing he had ever seen. I could almost hear his lascivious thoughts form his expression alone, and it made me burn all over.

And then there was a hand somewhere on my collarbone and I realized Itachi was touching something I hadn't even noticed was there - the Yin and Yang necklace Naruto had gotten for me on his birthday that I always wore and had forgotten to take off.

Despite my suddenly rampant thoughts, when Itachi spoke, it wasn't to ask about the necklace.

"What's wrong?" Itachi asked, gently instead even as his hands came to rest on the sides of my neck in a calm, yet firm manner that screamed of possessiveness and almost had me moaning again my libido escalating with every passing second.

For someone who had been so completely out of control at lunchtime, he seemed infuriatingly composed at this point. He was so perfectly calculating it was both arousing and aggravating. Itachi thought he had complete control now, did he?

Fucking hypocrite, I thought, my mind quickly running through our conversation at the coffee shop. Moral grounds? Yeah, right.

Fuck this.

Inhaling sharply through my nose, I looked deep into his eyes resolutely, one of my hands curling around the silky hairs at the back of his head again. Without warning, I pulled at his hair roughly to tug his head back in one swift move. "I want you to stop screwing around and touch me like you fucking mean it," I snapped, leaning in so our mouths were a breath away from touching, my voice coming out surprisingly demanding. His eyes widened the slightest bit as his pupils dilated in a flash of something feral. His fingers tightened almost threateningly around my neck, thumbs pressing ever so slightly on my carotids, but I was too far gone in my own yearning to feel intimidated.

"Is that what you want?" he breathed out, challengingly. Our naked chests had come into contact and the feel of his skin against mine made every part of me painfully aware of everything about him in a primal way - his scent, the rigidness of his body, the heat between us and the hardness of our cocks squeezed together.

I couldn't even think rationally anymore as ventured a few provocative thrusts of my hips, his expectant and evaluating eyes stuck to mine as I made my free hand sneak between our bodies to trail down his abs before I hooked my fingers on the elastic band of both his pants and underwear teasingly. My teeth scrapped at his lower lip first before giving it a rough tug and letting go. "What do you think?"

Itachi's mouth came forward to capture mine then igniting both our senses at once as sobriety went to hell.

Fuck, yes.

I parted my lips more so he could hungrily thrust his tongue inside as we kissed lewdly for a while, our rapid breaths colliding as the temperature between us seemed to skyrocket.

Single handedly, I somehow managed to pull his pants down as much as possible and finally free his erection from its confines, the action causing it to slap a bit against my abdomen and leave a trail of warm wetness there. Knowing he was so aroused he was fucking leaking was enough to make my own cock pulse with want. I was acutely aware of the scent of his arousal, and it did nothing to soothe me.

We never stopped kissing as I held his cock in my hand, feeling myself burning up further in both excitement and a strange form of embarrassment because damn, he was bigger than I had anticipated. Itachi released a guttural, unfamiliar sound at the contact, his body shivering slightly as I chanced a few experimental pumps, relishing in how slippery he was that made it so easy to touch and, hopefully, please. I was overwhelmed at how vulnerably responsive he was.

Both of his hands let go of my neck to unapologetically sneak inside my pants and grab hold of both my ass cheeks in a firm squeeze. I could feel slender fingers in the crevice of my ass, brushing over my sensitive entrance, and even if it was unintentional (or not) I felt myself tense in anticipation as I sort of wished those fingers would try to explore more. Instead, I found myself gasping as I was being urged forward in one swift motion in a silent demand for more contact, more friction. My heart was wild and constricted in my sexual haze, the sensation of our naked chests touching so intimately maddening, and all I could think of was why was he such a fucking good kisser and tasted and felt so fucking good.

There was a sort of mature masculinity to him that I wasn't used to, and it threw me off balance completely, driving me crazy.

I broke the kiss with a loud suction noise then and tugged his head further backwards, our feral eyes meeting for a second before I leaned down to run my tongue languidly over the column of his neck, the thin sheen of perspiration forming there invading my senses like some heavenly nectar. I used my thumb to rub at the tip of his cock as I jerked it, taking a moment to bury my nose in the junction where his shoulder and neck met to take a deep whiff of his scent, feeling myself going increasingly dizzy with unfulfilled yearning. The pleasurable sounds Itachi made as he breathed were the most amazing thing I'd ever heard, and he was doing it for and because of me.

This was when I vaguely realized he was tugging at my pants, pulling them down and I all but lifted my hips up momentarily to help him, moaning because the simple action of my painfully hard cock bobbing out was enough to almost make me come.

"Let go of my hair, Sasuke," I heard Itachi murmuring seductively yet commandingly against the curve of my neck, even if there was a hint of desperation in his voice that pleased me immensely. "Now."

More because I couldn't think straight than to obey, I released his hair, and it was if with that I had unleashed a wild beast, because I felt his hand circling my leaking cock - and even that was bigger and more engulfing than I was used to - but there was no experimental hesitance in him as he worked it with fast, confident pumps, precum making it all deliciously slippery. I was instantly flooded with pleasure and feverish shivers, my heart swelling with so much longing I could hardly think.

Itachi urgently hugged me in an almost bone-crushing way, his back straightening as leaned forward, mouth colliding against mine again in a ravaging kiss. For a few awkward seconds I had to adjust my legs so instead of being folded under me they could wrap around his waist. It wasn't exactly comfortable, but I didn't care anymore; I just wanted release and I was already so close nothing seemed to matter.

My tongue invaded his mouth with a thirst for him I didn't really know I had until then, and he responded with the same intensity, neither caring about how sloppy or loud our kissing was, both intent on simply feeling and tasting, owning.

Everything was just fucking perfect, from his wanton mouth on me to the feel of his hands, the low sounds he made and how fucking delicious his own skin felt and tasted.

The feel of his hand confidently fisting my cock was amazing and all I could do was savagely thrust against it in an instinctual need for more, fucking it as if my very life depending on it as I tried my best to keep what little focus I had left on jerking him off too, one arm around his shoulders so I could hold on to him for dear life. I couldn't hold back the gasps that left my mouth, and his own low indecent groans didn't help at all.

All I knew was that I was going to come in a matter of seconds, and that I wanted Itachi to come, too – and hard - because of me.

My muscles shivered, legs tightening shakily around him as pleasure threatened to overflow, heat filling me helplessly. It was my turn to break the kiss so I could urgently look down and see our hands working each other's cocks at a fast pace and I almost regretted it because the sight was too unexpectedly hot.

"Urgh… damn it…" I hissed, closing my eyes and throwing my head back, Itachi taking advantage of this to press wet, erratic kisses all over my chest, the nails of his free hand digging into the skin of my back and making me hiss and fuck, that felt mind-blowingly good.

"Tighten your hand more," Itachi suddenly hissed, before mouthing and lapping at an overly sensitive nipple in such a lewd way it would make any experienced person blush, my body shivering openly without my consent. Still, I managed to be mindful of his request as I tightened my fist around his cock and picked up the pace, effectively making him moan in approval - the sound of it too much for me. I hugged him close to me just as I felt him pulsing in my grasp, his teeth sinking down on my nipple roughly, forcing jolts of pain and pleasure to course through my body.

I tried to hold my orgasm in only long enough to feel his seed coating my hand and hitting my stomach before letting myself go as every muscle in me contracted and sheer ecstasy washed over me, my body curling slightly, my head falling so my forehead hit the top of Itachi's head, my nose buried in his hair that smelled so fucking amazing and only eased me through my bliss all the more perfectly. I know I released a few incoherent curses as I fucked my orgasm into his relentless hand, vaguely aware of my seed leaving me in powerful spurts and hitting his body, long having forgotten to be even remotely proper, too lost in that strange world where we connected so frighteningly ideally.

There was a frantic moment where we just rode the high of heavenly climax, our incoherent huffing the only sound that could be heard.

At some point, my cock stopped pulsing and my body felt heavy from post orgasmic bliss, yet Itachi's hand kept pumping it in a considerably slower pace now, almost as if relishing in the feel of it, my cum making it amazingly slippery.

I loved that, and it made me acutely conscious of the fact that my own hand was full of his cum, and I could feel remnants of it on my navel too.

I stilled, shaking slightly from the aftershocks of sex, panting as I nuzzled the top of my brother's head with my nose, humming at the still oddly pleasurable sensation provided to my still very alert cock. "Would you stop?" I mumbled lazily, inhaling sharply, even as my own hand ventured a few languid pumps around his length teasingly. "My inconsiderate ass will assault you again."

Itachi all but made an indistinguishable sound with the back of this throat, his lips gently kissing my breast over where he had so aggressively bitten as if it would magically soothe it - it kind of only made me feel even more sensitized, but surely he knew that. "Did I hurt you?" he asked quietly, voice a mixture of concern and satisfaction.

"It doesn't hurt," I assured him, wondering if he felt some kind of guilt for having gone that far or was feeling smug about it. "I'm not exactly new at this, you know."

Itachi finally released my cock, and I took that as a sign that I should stop teasing, too. Leaning back a little, I looked down at him just as he was tilting his head up so we could look at each other. "You don't need to remind me of that," my brother said evenly, his voice having gone back to its usual composed tone.

Itachi's expression as his eyes watched my features was one I could only perceive as carefully loving and lustful, yet openly studious. I brought my lips close to his so our mouths were merely brushing lightly against each other. Our bodies were still wonderfully close, more than they had ever been in fact, and that thought alone brought me an unfaltering sense of joy. "I will do so as many times as I have to so you can stop thinking I'm some delicate doll you're afraid to break," I countered, my cum coated hand coming up to touch one of his breasts in a meaningful squeeze, uncaring if I was smudging it. "Still, you have to explain to me what your moral grounds are exactly because you clearly can't hold back for shit."

I could feel his annoyance at my accusation, yet, a possessive hand travelled up and down my spine as Itachi's tongue flicked out to run over the seam of my lips.

"You're like an animal in heat," he muttered, his own cum coated hand coming to grab mine over his chest. Slowly, like I had done at the coffee shop not too long ago, he intertwined our fingers. "I unfortunately feel like one too when we're together like this."

I was a little taken aback at how easy it was for us to be dirty like this together. Maybe we shared the same sort of indecent kinks.

"Because you love me so much you have no control?" I whispered, smirking slightly before mouthing lightly at his lips. "Too bad it isn't just 'love', huh?"

The way Itachi's body tensed and his cock twitched against me as it seemed to lengthen gave me the answer I needed, and fuck me, there was something really hot about knowing he was so easily affected by me. That he could recover so fast was also a dizzying thought, but then again, I felt like my own moment of post-orgasmic calm was quickly being replaced by another wave of unforgiving lust.

It was overwhelming to feel, and overwhelming to consider.

There was no denying how mindlessly attracted we were to each other, and I hoped Itachi could understand that his 'moral values' could not fight against that - I wouldn't let him. Not now that I had him exactly where I - apparently - had always wanted him.

"'Love' should always come before 'sex'," Itachi said, nibbling on my jaw before pressing slow kissed up my cheeks.

"I always thought both things should come hand in hand for any relationship to work," I commented, with a sigh because, God, nothing had the right to feel this good, over and over again.

I was fascinated by the way his fingers slowly caressed mine through our slippery fluids, now mixed together in a disgustingly ideal way, and couldn't help but wonder what kind of lover Itachi was, who liked to bite and felt comfortable with cumplay, if this interaction was any indication. I wasn't any different, I supposed, because I enjoyed all of it, too-

"I didn't think our 'love' would be this raw," Itachi whispered in my ear. "It's difficult to wrap my mind around it even if it is thoroughly enticing."

I could tell I was going to have a hard time going soft if the way my body heated up at his words was any indication. But then again, Itachi's tongue doing amazing things to the lobe of my ear didn't seem to want to allow me to quiet down at all.

"So, who's exactly being dragged along by their impulses?" I huffed, my voice coming out shaky now as chills of newfound arousal ran through me. "Is it that bad that we don't really know what we're doing?"

"I'm not sure I want to find out." Itachi seemed to be breathing hard again. "For now, I just…"

I silenced him by grabbing his face in my free hand and kissing him hard, by now knowing that we were already so all over the place that it would be enough to ignite everything all over again.

Itachi's dirty hand let go of mine, and I was only slightly surprised when he grabbed for my thighs and stood, easily carrying me up with him. I had the right mind to tighten my legs closer around his waist and hug his shoulders for leverage. I couldn't believe he was strong enough to fucking carry me like I was made of fucking cotton but damn, that did things to me and I did hope he would take advantage of that many, many more times.

I could all but laugh disbelievingly before capturing his mouth again.

In a daze of hormonal frenzy and frantic happiness, I let all thoughts and worries leave my mind as we made our way to his bedroom.

That night was the first where I felt so devastatingly free and in love I felt like if I had to die, I'd gladly go as a happy man.

Itachi's POV

Dinner had been completely forgotten and I hadn't picked up the script once to look at it. A few of my emails were still open, waiting for replies I had not been able to provide.

It was already near midnight and I had yet to feel sleep willing to claim me. Sasuke and I would have to get up in four hours to get ready for our flight to Osaka, only to then take the one hour commute to Kyoto, where I would be filming the movie scenes for a few days.

My uneasy mind still could not fully acknowledge all the things Sasuke and I had done, several times over, and he had just gotten there, not even twelve hours previously.

Propped up on an elbow, I looked down at Sasuke's slumbering face in the dim moonlight that filtered through the window of my room. On his back with a hand over his stomach, his face was slightly turned to me and he slept so soundlessly I couldn't help but hover a finger in front of his nose to make sure he was breathing properly - a habit I had since he'd been a baby.

Confirming that he was in fact breathing, I then gently brushed a few strands of his fringe away from his closed eyes, my eyes roaming over the simple, yet handsome contours of his face. Sasuke did have the most fascinating type of beauty I had ever seen, so effortlessly flawless one couldn't help but be drawn to it. Certainly, in a few years he would be quite the stunning adult.

Observing him like this forced several inscrutable emotions to course through me.

Despite myself, I considered if this emotional and mental chaos I felt was what it meant to be 'in love'.

Just seeing him like this made my chest burn. It had been so long since the last time he had slept in my bed that it almost felt unreal to have him there now, so comfortable in my sheets, so willingly wearing my clothes that were a little too big, even if he wasn't exactly small.

Not for the first time I wondered how it was possible to go from nothing to end up like this when just a few months previously he would look as if he wanted to crawl out of his skin the moment I so much as reached out to touch him.

My love for that individual had always been controlled, something I understood and accepted, one way or another, regardless of being aware of its true nature or not. Having him emotionally and physically distanced from me had been painful but easy to handle - at least I didn't have to think about how I felt or how he felt and whether it was right or wrong. I didn't have to consider if my jealousy and my longing belonged to a dark spectrum that we shouldn't approach.

Fundamentally, Sasuke's actions when pushing me away and unknowingly hurting me had been valid, and a part of me had resigned to accepting it. After all, he hadn't known how I felt in the first place.

Still, unconsciously, he had thrummed the right notes in me, and I had all but danced to his music, every instinct I had awakening to his song. This marveled, yet angered me. Not knowing who exactly was to blame for our situation angered me.

All my life I had prepared myself to be his brother, and that was the undeniable truth. Even if I understood that my longing for him went beyond familiar, I hadn't once allowed myself to want him differently, or even think about him in such ways because I was so devoted and protective of him I need to keep him safe - even from me - and unblemished.

Perhaps I hadn't done it correctly, so eager had I been in providing everything for him and making sure he understood my affections. Perhaps my love had been too demanding, even in a brotherly context and had, unintentionally, called out to him.

I could only berate myself. Was I the one to blame for the way Sasuke's feelings for me had progressed?

Regardless, being aware of them had lured me in. I should've been the one to create a new sort of safe distance between us, try to placate him and understand him, but instead I had willingly invaded his space and made it so we could, eventually, come down to this.

How does one turn away from the one thing they love the most?

Indeed, I had opened the gates to my own personal hell.

Sasuke was highly intelligent, but also strongly driven by his emotions and his impulses. I was aware that being in love with me, his brother, wasn't easy to accept and that his feelings had caused him a lot of pain for several reasons. I couldn't blame him for trying to hurt me when he was so scared of me, yet so desperate to be seen so I could at least comprehend him and forgive him for not wanting me close.

It's not as if I didn't know this, so why was I so angry at him?

Sasuke was far from being perfect, but he was so in my eyes. That he would go so far as to use someone else to forget about me horrified me. His attitude had been unforgiving, and he hadn't even noticed it.

I never wanted Sasuke to become that type of person because of me. He claimed to love me, but what was 'love' to him in such a situation? What did he expect to come out of our 'love'?

And how could he claim to 'be in love' with someone else at the same time?

I felt like I couldn't understand him at all. I was appalled, yet impressed at these sides of Sasuke that I hadn't yet known.

To me, 'love' had always been a set of straight lines that led me to Sasuke, Shisui and my family, all those paths clear, unchanging. Then, my 'love' path to Sasuke had split into millions of other lines that I had never considered before and had yet to walk through. That unsettled me.

I was highly disturbed by the fact that I didn't know what this new form of 'love' for Sasuke looked like. I had deluded myself into believing I knew what I was dealing with and yet, that frustration, jealousy and possessiveness, the fear, the longing - all of it had hit me with a force I hadn't expected, and I was rendered powerless before it.

My selflessness turned into selfishness.

Not having control over the events unfolding before me was not a feeling I was comfortable with.

I knew that what Sasuke and I were doing was a taboo. I knew he was underage, even if already in an age of consent. These were things that I was acutely aware of and that I knew I should be held accountable for. No matter how strong my feelings were, I was supposed to be the better man. I genuinely thought I could act as such.

Sasuke and I would solve things between us quietly, slowly deciding how to act around each other and where it might lead us. That's what I had thought. My level of attraction had been high, but I had predicted that, considering our blood relation, things would be hesitant for a while.

However, all my assumptions were shattered the moment my lips touched his. I knew I was attracted, but I didn't know it would manifest itself the way it did, neither did I expect that Sasuke - after talking about his own self-disgust - would be so willing to tear down walls and give himself so easily.

Like a poorly contained tide, all the doors I had shut in my mind and body burst open and everything I had no idea I'd been holding back poured out of me, flooding my senses and clouding my mind. There was nothing I could do but let it all wash over the both of us.

A part of me wondered if this had been as surprising to Sasuke as it was for me. I should've seen it coming, though, considering how tense things had been between us.

My lack of control upset me greatly. I was supposed to keep things in check - I was the responsible adult.

It had been far too easy to let go, to want, and to hope. But this was me being frivolous. Sasuke was young, passionate and eager to be with someone he wanted, his mind filled with dreams, his body responsive to every ounce of affection I had for him. But was this deliverance completely sane? Did he understand the implications?

It seemed so simple to him, yet, he said he was in love with someone else and had reservations about certain things between us in public. Of course, I would never do anything to openly show the nature of our relationship, but his paranoia did nothing to make me feel at ease. Sasuke had, at some point, made up for the weakness, but it wasn't enough.

What was he expecting from this? How was he planning on handling it in the future?

It was still so soon to be thinking about these things, but things were progressing fast, as well.

As I leaned down to press a small kiss to my sleeping brother's forehead, my eyes fell shut as I recalled the several heated interactions we had shared. I almost shuddered.

'Love' was a much more complicated concept than what I had initially though.

I had been with several partners in my life, most them that had ended up in penetrative sex, and yet, I couldn't think of a single one that had felt as powerful and helpless as I felt when with Sasuke.

The thought alone was haunting.

Releasing a sigh, I grabbed my cell phone before quietly getting out of bed and leaving the room, closing the door behind me.

I made my way to the kitchen, closing the door as well once I was inside, leaving the lights off. As I made my way to the tall glass doors that led to the balcony, I searched for Shisui's phone number and made the call.

Leaning against the glass ai looked down at the sparkling horizon filled with lights, the view managing to barely soothe my troubled soul.

"'Tachi!" Shisui greeted me soon after, and I felt relieved listening to his cheerful voice, even if I knew he would pick up my call - he always did.

"Shisui," I greeted back, in a low voice. "I'm sorry for bothering you at this hour."

"Oh, shut up," he dismissed easily. "It's not like you to call so late, so I presume you have something serious to talk about?"

My throat constricted as much as my chest at that and I had to take a moment to swallow because my voice seemed to have gotten stuck. Even these sorts of reactions on my part were a novelty to me and I was not pleased.

"Let me guess; this is about Sasuke," Shisui said, reading my silence perceptively. "Did things go wrong?"

I cleared my throat, to try and relax it somehow. "It didn't go wrong," I managed to utter. "It went… in a surprising direction."

"Whoa, don't tell me you two fucked?!"

In spite of myself, I felt my body tensing and my face heating up at my cousin's bluntness. "It didn't go that far, thankfully," I said, again, closing my eyes at the memory, torn between fondness and frustration at how my body reacted to it. "Things did happen, though."

"But that's good news, isn't it?" Shisui asked, sounding genuinely excited on my behalf. "You confirmed your suspicions and you guys sorted things out, how great is that?"

"Well, in fact…"

Taking a deep breath, I briefly told him about my conversations with Sasuke and, leaving the details aside, how we got involved - several times - and Shisui, as expected, patiently listened without interrupting.

"Through all of this, he says he's in love with Naruto," I finished, even though I had already mentioned it before, looking down at my bare feet.

Shisui made a thoughtful sound with the back of his throat. "I don't see why that upsets you so much?" he said, conversationally. "Didn't you say Sasuke started dating him because of you?"

"That has nothing to do with what I just said," I replied, with a frown.

"Sasuke likes Naruto, that's just a big deal in your own head; it's got nothing to do with how he feels about you, neither does it mean he's not being honest," Shisui said, as if silently calling me an idiot. "You've probably been in love with him since he was born, and you still took other lovers. Do you love him any less for that?"

I brought a hand to my mouth and took a sharp intake of breath. "That's not the issue," I muttered.

"Then what is?"

"He's a sack of hormones, Shisui!" I threw, burying my face in my hand, exhaustion making me lean my head against the glass. "He's completely lost in this situation happening between us. Life with me as a lover will not be simple, and he thinks he understands but he doesn't; he's just getting carried away because it's all new, but he's reckless. What's going to happen after it fades?"

"You're scared that he's immature just because he gets hot and bothered around you," Shisui stated, straight to the point. "Come on, 'Tachi, he's seventeen and in love with you! You guys are sexually and emotionally compatible, he feels that, so what did you expect; for him to quietly sit still around you?"

I bit down on my lower lip because this knowledge was something that was still eerie to me - that my brother and I collided so magnificently in intimate matters - and it did things to my body I had no control over.

"He's ruthless," I confessed, willing my body to stop feeling the impending sparks of desire from igniting. "He is capable of turning the tables against me in ways I didn't expect."

"How is that working out for you?"

Shisui knew me all too well and sometimes, because he had chosen to lead such a carefree life, I tended to forget that he was probably the most intelligent man I had ever known - even more so than myself.

"It does things to me." I sighed, frustrated that my lower parts were already responding to thoughts of Sasuke's feisty attitude. "I want to eat him alive. It scares me."

"Why does it scare you?"

"I have no control," I snapped, rubbing my face before lowering my hand so I could look out the glass doors again. "I should be able to. He shouldn't be able to manipulate me the way he does and yet, after one day I'm already a helpless mess. I don't like feeling this way. He's a child, and my brother. We shouldn't be doing these things."

"He's not a child," Shisui huffed. "Sasuke is a very intelligent young man, Itachi, and even if he is more impulsive than you, he knows what he's doing. He makes you tick because you have exposed yourself and your desire for him, so he takes advantage of that." He seemed to smile. "It doesn't have to be a bad thing, you know. You love him, so it's only normal that you have no control over your emotions and that's fine."

"It's not fine," I countered. "I always have control over everything."

"Well, you knew 'love', but you didn't know what loving him romantically would be like." Shisui chuckled. "You're completely virgin to romantic love, my friend."

I was silent for a few seconds, considering my friend's words. Put simply, that was very accurate - I had never been romantically involved with anyone, neither did I ever feel the slightest bit inclined to try it with anyone. To be honest, I had never felt chemistry with anyone on the same level I did with Sasuke, least of all to the point of wanting to initiate a relationship with them.

"I was certain I had the basics figured out," I replied, honestly, because I did know the dynamics in theory, but when it came to the practical part, applied to me it was all very different.

"No-one does; that's not possible, least of all when two people are clearly hot for each other."

I rolled my eyes at him impatiently. "Don't be crude about it," I admonished, making a face even if I knew there was really no smooth way to put it. "When he realizes how this will end he will choose the easiest path. I wonder if giving in truly is the right thing to do for the both of us. I feel like I'm drowning already. And here I told him that he was the one who…"

"Itachi, I need you to listen to me now," Shisui interrupted, now with serious emphasis. "Don't do this to yourself. You two love each other regardless of blood ties or age, which, by the way is only a five year gap."

I sighed again, exasperated. "Shisui…"

"You don't have to be the bigger man in this," he cut, almost as if admonishing me, and I could only press my lips tight together. "Do you know how many people would kill to have what you two are having right now?"

I did know. Nothing in my life had ever felt like this. But then again, the type of relationship Sasuke and I always had as brothers had been unique and highly envied by others. I had never thought that our love for each other could grow further and engulf us like this, not in this particular way.

"You can't be scared of loving him just because you're afraid to lose him, or because you think it's not morally or socially acceptable. You can't predict what's going to happen, so don't think that you have to take matters in your own hands just so you can have complete control. "

"I can't…"

"Don't do this to him," he insisted, and this made me tense. "Don't make assumptions about him, and more importantly, don't decide for yourself what you think is best for him; you know it didn't go well in the past."

He was right, of course. My way of always wanting to plan everything for Sasuke had often upset him and caused us to end up fighting, even if Sasuke always forgave me because he knew I had his best interests at heart.

"I don't want to think about things this way," I confessed, pushing a strand of my loose hair away from my face by tucking it behind my ear. "I didn't know it was possible to feel even more content with him than I already did with us as brothers, yet this is a whole new concept. But if I go too deep, then what will happen?" I wet my lips, my own words making me feel even more uneasy. "It's unreasonable how much I don't want to give him away to someone else, even if I know it would be the most sensible thing to do. I didn't know it would feel like this, this… untamable force that I didn't know could possess me like this."

If it hadn't been Shisui, I would not have voiced these things at all, instead keeping them to myself to never be uttered, but he was my best friend, and there was no-one else I could - or would - ever turn to with a troubled mind.

"You lived your whole life thinking about him." There was a trace of a condescending smile in Shisui's voice now. "Everything you did, everything you achieved, your apartment, your schedule. everything you do you keep him in the back of your mind, and yet, through all of this, you knew that he might not act according to your plans, that he might not even want to be beside you like you always wanted. You never even expected that the two of you would ever come to where you are now."

Momentarily I closed my eyes. "I know."

"Then take the chance and enjoy it!" He said, as if it was obvious."Have him to yourself! Have fun, fuck, do whatever you want. It's not like you have to plan ahead. You don't need to decide on how to work things out right now, you know he wants to graduate at his current school. Stop making a fuss, geez."

It was easy for Shisui to say, I thought, hugging myself with an arm. For him, it was easy to go with the flow and think about everything else afterwards, but that wasn't something I ever did, nor something I ever wanted to do. I was a man who meticulously planned ahead, measuring everything, calculating all the possible actions and their several consequences and outcomes before deciding on which route to take, certain that it was the right one.

Impulsiveness and recklessness were things I simply did not do. I don't think I ever did until this whole issue with Sasuke had started, and my body seemed to have miraculously forgotten to keep up with my mind.

Still, I couldn't help but smile at Shisui's carefree advice. "You always make things sound so simple," I muttered.

I wished that I could be that simple too, and do as he said without feeling angry at myself. I hated the uncertainty of not being able to see beyond what was presented to me. I hated not being able to take control and know what to do, where I was headed or how.

"And you always think too much," he replied, with a chuckle before pausing. "Learn what it feels like to love him like this. You've always been exceptionally rational, so be rational now and go for practicality. It's precisely because Sasuke's young that you need to give him time to understand what he wants, Itachi."

"I don't know how I'll feel if he decides he doesn't want me."

"Is all of this because of Naruto?" Shisui groaned in exasperation. "Because Naruto exists, you think Sasuke isn't invested in you? You see him as a threat? Even though Sasuke used him to get to you? Are you serious right now?"

"You don't know Sasuke like I do," I reminded him, rubbing at the back of my neck tiredly. "He's popular but doesn't have many friends. For him to so easily admit his feelings for that boy means Naruto got through to him, one way or another. He does care for him."

"Itachi, you two may not have fucked yet, but he's having sex with you when he went so far with Naruto because he didn't want to even think about wanting you! If you feel the weight of him being your brother and you still crossed the line because you're in love, don't you think that's the same for him?"

"Or maybe he's so overwhelmed by being with me and infatuated by the thought of a forbidden affair that he can't think straight," I snapped. "When he realizes what this is and the future it has he'll go back to him in a heartbeat. "

"Uchiha Itachi, you can't possibly mean that when you know how much he has adored you his whole life!" Shisui gasped, reproachfully, instantly filling me with guilt. "This has nothing to do with Naruto! You're not exactly in a position to make demands when you opened the door so Sasuke could see he was reciprocated! He may have poked you, but you chose to go for it and mess up his relationship with blondie."

Again, Shisui knew exactly where to step on and I wasn't happy about it regardless of how right he was.

"Sasuke is in his right to love someone else, but that doesn't overlap how he feels about you. If you love him, you'll have to understand that."

I took a sharp intake of breath through my nose, feeling that constricting pain in my chest again. "I don't love anyone else, so I can't logically find my mind in a position to understand," I defended.

"You will if you have to take action," Shisui warned, sounding slightly annoyed at me, and I couldn't blame him. I knew I was being irrational. "You can't just expect Sasuke to express his feelings all by himself, Itachi, and give you all the proof of love that you want. You need to fight for him too, because there's not enough sex in this world that will make up for someone's selfishness."

"What are you saying?"

"Look, just… take things one step at the time, okay? Although, you're definitely a hundred steps ahead already," he joked, to lighten up the mood that had gotten considerably heavy. "Work with things as they go, see where it leads the both of you and then take charge of how to proceed. For now, just enjoy all the stuff you've already arranged for his time with you and live a little. Eat him alive if you must. From what you've told me I think he'd happily accept it."

Once more, Shisui hit the nail, but I still found myself feeling uncomfortable. "Don't say shameless things like that about him."

"I'm sure your perception of him is a lot dirtier than anything I've said so far."

"Stop being so perceptive; I'm not happy with myself."

"You don't say. I couldn't tell at all from this conversation."

I huffed at the sarcasm. "He's too young to be so eager."

"You're a demanding lover, I sincerely doubt you're disappointed that he gets your juices going just the right way." Shisui laughed. "Honestly, you sick fuck; stop being a prude and just admit that you're happy that it's him the person who finally gets your gears going. You're simply angry because you're loving it and you want to be moralistic about it, but you can't. It's alright to think with your dick before your head once in a while."

I found myself feeling slightly envious of Shisui's genius before being viciously assaulted by a wave of unwelcomed lust then as my whole body shook with awareness of how true that was. I had to lean away from the window to try and gain some balance because I suddenly felt dazed.

That indecent man had no shame, I thought, feeling my muscles tensing with arousal and acknowledgement. "It was nice talking to you Shisui," I said, keeping my voice neutral and composed, thinking that it was better for my sanity if we didn't talk about this any further.

"Yeah, yeah I hit a nerve, now go jerk off or something. Better yet, ask Sasuke to give you a hand." Shisui teased, easily picking up on my blatant dismissal. "Don't forget what I told you, though. Promise?"

"I'll try," I replied, honestly. "Thank you for listening to me."

"You can call anytime."

I hung up, staring at the screen of my cell phone unblinkingly. It's not like Shisui had told me anything I wasn't knowledgeable of, but it had still felt relieving to express my fears and emotions out loud. More importantly, it had been comforting knowing that at least someone other than Sasuke and myself supported that madness.

I mentally did a quick re-play of my conversation with my cousin, musing that it never ceased to impress me how astonishingly well he could read me. We had been best of friends since babies, and he was the person who had seen me grow in ways others hadn't so, even more than Sasuke himself, Shisui knew sides of me no-one else did.

There was no lie to any of his words, though. No matter what I said, there was no doubt that Sasuke's effect on me both baffled and made me feel ecstatic. A part of me admonished me for looking at him - my own brother - in such a lewd way, but another part was hopelessly enchanted and seduced by the reckless fire in him.

For someone who had never felt such intense possessive love before, it was more than clear to me that we fit perfectly. My mind said that I should do something to placate that fire of his and keep him safe in a world where things wouldn't be so complicated, but my heart and my body urged me to set him ablaze and see how far he would burn, how much of me he could consume and how much of himself he would give.

I absently bit down on a thumb to distract myself from my heated thoughts.

I think, at least about this, there was only so much that Shisui could understand in his advocate words in favor of fighting for the beauty of love, no matter what its shape was.

Wasn't Shisui just being hypocritical when he had never truly fought for his own 'love'? Still, perhaps I was the one to blame for that since I hadn't given him many openings in that regard. I was a busy man and our relationship was good enough being uncomplicated as it was. Considering my feelings for Shisui had always been something that, much like my feelings for Sasuke, wasn't something I had ever entertained for several reasons. Some types of love were better off remaining easygoing and unburdened.

I sighed, feeling slightly guilty for making Shisui listen to my own hypocritical conflicts.

He's a truly remarkable man, though, I thought, feeling my chest warm with fondness.

Even if I had prepared myself to never have Sasuke, I had not prepared myself to have him and then lose him, nor to want him so much that I wanted all of his attention and love to myself.

If given the choice, I would have chosen him to love and want him all over again, no hesitation and no remorse. My own morals did only go so far. What kind of person did that make me?

It was selfish indeed. I had accused Sasuke of being selfish and unmindful, but I was no better. Not when I knew I could easily steal Sasuke away from the world we knew and give up everything if he told me that was what he wanted.

Were we both so sane and so mindful of everything as Shisui thought? Was mindlessly indulging out of suppressed love the right thing to do?

And then what? Would Sasuke's love for me have the same weight against Naruto's heartwarming, carefree and safe love?

In the end, there were no answers to any of it and I knew that such a thing was, for me, unacceptable regardless of Shisui's advice to not overthink it. At some point, my mind would break.

Perhaps that was what I feared the most.

TBC…

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