Chapter 33
Mina woke up suddenly, but had to lie down again due to the strong dizziness.
She noted that she was piped to a machine and had an artificial vent attached.
-'the fuck?
She removed all that mess of tubes and tried to get out of bed, but lost her balance.
Before she could fall to the ground, she noticed someone catch her in time.
-I see you woke up. You've been sleeping a long time - it was Law, who sounded happy.
-What the hell happened...?
-You've been in a coma for two months. Since you are fucking unable to listen to me, you obviously almost bled to death. Also, you have an extremely rare blood type, the S (RH-). We were lucky that Black Leg-also had your blood type, otherwise you would have died.
Mina made a mental note to thank the Mugiwara cook later. She tried to get up, but her legs didn't respond.
-Don't even try, you opened your head and lost too much blood, so you will have to be in therapy for a long time before you can walk again.
Mina sighed.
-Where are the others?
-Sabo-ya and Dragon-ya have been deciding for several weeks a new organization so that there is peace between all countries. I also understand that they have given you amnesty, so they have forgiven your pre-war crimes.
Mina saw she was inside the Polar Tang.
-I want to go home...
-Are you stupid? Now that you have woken up, you will be in therapy for months, so you will stay here with us. Also, what home? Weren't you homeless?
True, she was homeless. Dressrosa was not an option, and Baltigo was destroyed.
"Maybe it's a good idea to stay with them ..."
Mina tried to pick up the chopsticks correctly to eat, but she still didn't have enough skill with her left hand, so they fell all the time.
After her twentieth attempt, the girl finally sighed annoyed and stared at the food.
All the pirates watched her with sorrow. It was really hard to see her in such a deplorable state. Until a few days ago, she still couldn't even move, but after several weeks of rehabilitation she had managed to get up, although she was clumsy.
Koala and Sabo went to visit her almost every week. Apparently, both weren't as badly injured as her, so they were hardly in rehab for a few weeks while she was still in a coma.
-Give them to me - she heard Law say to her as he removed her chopsticks and placed her fingers correctly.
-Don't force yourself, it's normal for it to cost you - he said with apparent indifference while continued eating
Mina looked at the surgeon askance and smiled slightly.
That man had been with her every single day since she woke up.
"Well, he's my doctor, it's logical" she told herself as shook any other thought from her head.
She tried to pick up the chopsticks again with her left hand, but dropped them again.
Desperate, she simply closed her eyes and raised her head as sighed.
"Ah shit. This is so annoying."
-Here - she heard Law say to her as he shoved the food into her mouth - At this rate, you will finish eating at night, I'd better feed you.
Mina giggled.
-You look like a hosewife~
-Shut up - he answered annoyed.
The rest of the crew looked at them with a drop of sweat behind their heads.
"Just marry already..."
Ikkaku looked at Mina, who was in the control room of the submarine looking at the window through which the ocean could be seen.
She saw her sigh.
When no one was with her, Mina simply stared at one random point for hours without saying anything.
-Mina-san... - Ikkaku approached carefully, so as not to scare her, but she did it anyways - What are you doing?
-Oh, Ikkaku - Mina smiled at the other woman in that submarine - I just like looking at the ocean.
Ikkaku looked at Mina's depressed gaze.
The first time she met her, Ikkaku hated Mina for being the woman his captain had chosen. She was beautiful with that gorgeous long white hair slightly pink. And those beautiful purple eyes and thick lashes.
"The captain only looks at her because of her appearance" is what she said to herself.
However, when she saw her as revolutionary, Ikkaku couldn't help but think she was kinda cool.
And after the war, as her head opened, Law had to shave her head in order to operate her, so right now she still had short hair, and not her beautiful long one.
Mina observed that Ikkaku was still looking at her.
-You know - she said with a sad smile - I look like when I was a teenager.
-Seriously? Did you have short hair?
-Not by choice. I was a kind of military slave, so we were all forced to wear shaved hair. I let my hair grow when I entered the Revolutionary Army to cover my face and not be recognized.
-Damn, that's so angsty...
Mina laughed.
-Well, I admit that short hair is much easier to manage. I don't have to comb it in the morning, fufufu.
Ikkaku looked at her with a little tenderness. Despite being in that deplorable state, Mina seemed to have a good personality and never complained about anything. But still, Ikkaku knew Mina was depressed. Really depressed.
"I guess that's why the captain likes you so much..."
-Ikkaku-ya? Mina-ya? - Law called them - What are you doing here? Bepo is going in, so you better get out so he can work.
Both women nodded. Ikkaku helped Mina up as she was still clumsy.
-Thanks ~
Ikkaku blushed. She didn't smile too much, but when she did, Mina was quite pretty.
-And what the hell are you doing here? - Law asked the revolutionary - How many times have I told you that you should rest or else you will never recover?
She just giggled.
Ikkaku saw how, despite appearing annoyed, Law looked at the revolutionary with a loving gaze that she had never seen in him.
"I guess he didn't just like you for how you looked..."
Im-sama laughed again as he held Mjosgrad's head.
-It's all your fault. If I had never met you, right now I would be alive.
Mina woke up from that nightmare.
...
Every night the same shit. The same kind of nightmares that reminded her that it was all her fault. How she had been unable to protect Mjosgard.
Mina began to tremble as she curled up.
"It's not my fault, he didn't die because of me"
But the voices in her head told her just the opposite.
Every night the same. Mina was tired of those voices that tormented her in the dark.
When she looked in the mirror, she could see all the people she had killed throughout her life. And she could see Mjosgard blaming her for his misfortune.
"You're guilty. They beheaded me because I tried to protect you"
"You're pathetic. Why don't you die? At least you will keep him company"
-SHUT UP! IT'S NOT MY FAULT! Please... stop...
That scream woke Law, who was sleeping with her.
-But what the hell...?
He watched as Mina was trembling and delusional again.
-Oi - he shook her to wake her up - It's just a dream. It's not real. Wake up.
Suddenly, she woke up from her paranoia again.
Law notice that she had tears in her eyes and her breathing was shaky, so he decided to hold her tight.
-I know you think it's real, but it's not.
Mina had been diagnosed with a strong post-traumatic stress syndrome, so she used to have very strong paranoia quite often.
And that was something that even Ope Ope No Mi could not cure. Law also had post-traumatic stress for many years because of Flevance's extermination and Cora-san's death. What's more, even from time to time he kept having nightmares.
-You'll be fine.
But obviously she wasn't.
Although she was physically improving, it was evident that her head wasn't okey.
-I heard that you still have nightmares - Sabo said a couple of days later, when he went to visit her as he used to do - If it is any consolation, I have them too.
-I don't know what to do... I just... I'm tired...
Sabo hugged her.
-I know how you feel, because I'm the same. Now that it's all over, you need another reason to keep living.
-You gave it to me a reason.
-But it's not enough anymore. You need to find a new reason on your own.
Mina froze.
-I don't have anything.
-I know. Everyone in the Revolutionary Army feels the same way. Some of us have been there all our lives and now we don't know what to do. But you have to keep going and find new dreams.
-Do you have any?
Sabo smiled sadly.
-I'm trying to find one - he sighed - I must do it for Luffy... and for me.
Mina looked at Sabo.
-Sometimes... I feel like I want to go away. Where no one can reach me. Where no one can see me.
-Then do it. If you need to go, then just go.
-I can't - she shook her head - I don't want to hurt Law and the rest. They have helped me so much ... it would be being ungrateful.
Sabo smiled and messed up her hair.
-Dumb kid. Don't think about the rest or you will never be happy. If you think you need to be alone for a while, do it. And if he gets mad, then it's his business not to understand it!
Mina smiled.
-Your advices are shitty ones.
Sabo giggled.
Mina entered Law's cabin, where she saw the surgeon sleeping still sitting at his desk with a pile of books around him.
She saw that man who had helped her so much during those 6 months. The man she liked the most.
¿Liked? Well, that was still confusing for her. It was more, but she didn't wanted to admited.
She couldn't help but touch his sleeping face, which made Law smile unconsciously.
-Law.
-Hm?
-Thanks for everything. I don't know what I would have done without you.
-I didn't do it for you, silly woman...
Mina giggled.
-Then why did you do it, silly man?
-Because I want you to be by my side.
That made her feel terribly guilty. She swallowed hard.
-I want you to be happy, Law.
-I already am. You make me happy.
-I can't make you happy, Law. I'm broken inside. If you just take care of me, then I'm just one more patient, and I don't want to be a patient - she stroked his face gently - I want to make you happy, but I can't do it like that.
Law growled.
She knelt down and looked at him while feeling great sadness.
-I'll come back when I find a reason to move on. When I am no longer a burden for you, for all of you.
Law didn't answer this time.
Mina smiled as she felt like she was going to cry, though she held back her tears.
-Will you wait for me?
-Silly woman.
That made her laugh a little. She got up and kissed him.
-Please don't hate me, I'll be back.
Law got up when he noticed a ray of sunlight hitting his face.
He looked at his watch and saw that it was already noon.
-Shit, I slept too much.
He got up from his chair and went to the kitchen. All his nakamas looked at him uncomfortably.
-C-Captain ... - Shachi greeted
After Penguin served him the food, Law realized that someone was missing.
-And Mina-ya? Is she sleeping or something?
They all looked at each other, not sure what to say.
Finally, Bepo handed a piece of paper to his captain.
-What is this?
-Better read it...
Law read that note while drinking, but immediately spit everything out.
-What the fuck!? Is this for real!?
Basically, it was a farewell letter saying she would be back soon.
-Is this some kind of prank or something?
They all cocked their heads.
Law then recalled the conversation last night.
-Shit... It wasn't a fucking dream!
Huge anxiety washed over him.
"It's not possible, you can't be doing this to me..."
Law read that note again with a few words. He closed his eyes and sighed.
-Fuck