Chapter Twenty Five: Peace?
Was this what peace felt like?
When the word spread the next morning, everyone had varying reactions, but one sentiment was clear: crisis was averted.
But at what cost?
The two Konoha Elders had merely brushed off the issue as one that Shisui and Itachi should have undertaken as shinobis of Konoha, while Hiruzen disagreed with both of them. Hiruzen felt the same shock, the same sadness in his heart, even if he knew the news was coming. He constantly blamed himself for allowing this to happen under his term. If Minato was still here…
To say the Hyuga were pleased would be a lie. To say the Hyuga were sad, well they were not. The majority of the Hyuga remained apathetic towards the entire situation, as the clan never particularly liked the Uchiha clan to begin with. Still, they understood the political implications of the loss of the Uchiha clan. In the eyes of the other nations, Konoha was considered to be weakened. So the Hyuga began to train their shinobis even harder, to prepare for another attack.
Like they did for every major event, the Nara, Akimichi, and Yamanaka clan gathered together to pay their respects to their fallen Uchiha comrades. Though the Uchiha clan as a whole did not gain their respect, they each paid their respects to the few Uchihas that had gotten along with the rest of the village. For the young Uchihas that had been among their peers in the Academy or on their genin teams.
The Anbu spent the night clearing away the bodies, scrubbing away the blood from the structures as much as possible to restore it to its former glory. Yet the Uchiha compound felt like a complete ghost town, with occasional gusts of wind sweeping the leaves through the compound.
The other clans remained quiet about the entire situation. For those who wept for the fallen clan, they did so in silence.
The civilians didn't know what to think. The more disgruntled of the civilians kept their view that the Uchiha clan deserved what had befallen them. Others felt sorry for the innocent Uchihas caught in the fray. Others extended their sympathies to the two remaining Uchihas in the village. All of them remained blissfully ignorant of why the Uchiha clan even had to fall in the first place.
Izumi had taken the news the hardest, even more than Sasuke. Perhaps Sasuke's young mind couldn't really comprehend what happened aside from being told that his entire family was dead and that he wasn't allowed to return to the compound. When Sasuke asked about his brother, it was Izumi who told him through tears that Itachi was the killer.
Izumi proceeded to spend the next couple of hours hugging Sasuke tightly while she sobbed her eyes out. Akemi and Momo settled themselves around Izumi and Sasuke, offering them silent comfort.
The only other person to find out the truth was Kakashi, who took the news wordlessly. And proceeded to rant about how stupid Itachi and Shisui had been to keep the news to themselves. And how selfish for them to decide to keep Kakashi and Rin out of the loop.
But he understood why. He just wished it didn't have to turn out this way.
The following weeks were busy. From attending the funeral for the Uchihas - most clans sent the main family to pay their respects - to taking on more missions to compensate for their loss of numbers. Genin teams were shuffled around and combined to complete the three man cell where there were two. The Anbu took over acting as the police force once more, although most of them hated doing it.
All of the jonins in the village received a newly issued copy of the bingo book. No one had to open it to figure out who was added in there under the missing nin section. Kakashi merely shoved it into his weapons pouch, while Rin sealed hers away in one of her many storage scrolls.
Rin moved out of her apartment, cleaning up the place for Izumi and Sasuke to live in. Officially, Izumi became Sasuke's new guardian, but it was clear the two didn't interact much. While Izumi went on her missions, Sasuke was either out training or spending time with Naruto. In just a few months, Sasuke would be enrolled in the Academy, thus spending even less time at home.
Neither of them wanted to step foot into the Uchiha compound again. Kakashi and Rin had been sent to retrieve their belongings for them. Though she didn't voice it aloud, Rin knew the event traumatized Izumi to the point of unlocking her Mangekyo Sharingan. Kakashi told Izumi to come find him if she ever wanted to learn how to wield it.
She didn't bother to give him a response.
It pained Rin to see one of her best friends retreat back into her shell. She wouldn't open up, not to anyone, not even at the offering of dango. In fact, Izumi knocked away Rin's offering of dango the first time she tried, claiming that she didn't want anything associated with "that man."
Temporarily, Rin crashed at Kakashi's place until she got a place sorted out. Yet it didn't matter all that much because the two of them were rarely home, being sent on back to back missions.
Hiruzen tried to assign new squad members to Team Ro, but Kakashi rejected the notion, claiming that just the two of them would be just fine. And they were, as Kakashi and Rin continued to carry on Team Ro's 99% success rate.
Neither of them spoke all that much on their missions, as when they did, it would remind them once more of their comrade's absence. All of the formations, plans, and combos they made as Team Ro were thrown out and between the two of them, they started from scratch to compensate for their absences.
With mission after mission, they didn't have time to think. And that was just how they wanted it.
Soon, it became abundantly clear that darkness was slowly overtaking their hearts.
A Year Later
Gai plopped down in the seat across from Kurenai, Asuma, and Izumi in the dango shop. The latter had finally overcome her mild depression and reverted back to her usual self, much to Kurenai's relief. Though at times a nightmare would invade her dreams to haunt her and remind her of the Uchiha Massacre, Izumi soldiered through it and found her way out of the darkness. It had been thanks to the three friends that had taken her in as part of their group, as well as her former genin teammates.
Even Sasuke's presence had an effect on her. With the burden of being the guardian of a young boy, Izumi quickly realized that she needed to be a good role model for him when dark thoughts began to pervade Sasuke's mind. Izumi hoped that she was successfully able to chase all thoughts of revenge out of his mind and even solicited Naruto to stay at their place more often than not. With Naruto present, Sasuke would be too busy arguing with him to think about hunting down his brother.
It had gotten to the point where the blonde boy practically lived at their own place, after his caretaker refused to house him any further on the account that he was old enough to take care of himself now that he was at the Academy.
Sasuke had achieved his dream of entering the Academy, as did Naruto, but it felt empty. Empty when Sasuke and Naruto were the only two who didn't have their parents pick them up after the ceremony. Empty when Sasuke hoped to see his brother come, but remembered that Itachi was an S rank missing nin. Empty when Naruto hoped to see Rin and Kakashi there, but they haven't appeared at all. It had been over a year since Naruto had seen them at all.
But the two of them had each other and Izumi. Their uncanny friendship, although Sasuke would be pressed to admit it, kept them going through any obstacle.
While Izumi managed to pull herself out of the darkness, it seemed that Kakashi and Rin were on the fast track to spiralling down it. They had seen the signs in Kakashi when his father committed suicide, but Team Minato had rooted him in. They had seen the signs when Obito first died, but they had Minato and Kushina to root them in. They had seen the signs when Rin almost died, but Rin had rooted him in. They had seen the signs again when Kushina and Minato died, but they had Itachi and Shisui to root them in.
And the signs were appearing once more. But this time, there was no one around to ground them to reality. Not when they constantly pushed away anyone who cared.
Gai had been the first to complain that Kakashi didn't bother to agree to his challenges. The rare times that Kakashi was in the village and even rarer the times that Gai found him, Kakashi flat out rejected his challenges without hearing him out.
The last time that happened was back when they were ten years old. Over time, Kakashi had gradually warmed up to Gai and eventually started to accept his friendship and rivalry that came along with it. Nowadays, Kakashi would just try every trick in the book to avoid Gai, often abusing Rin's sensory skills to avoid the overbearing man. Or Kakashi would make up excuses as to why he didn't want to participate in the challenge. Or he would divert Gai's attention by proposing a simple game of rock-paper-scissors.
Not flat out say no before one word could leave Gai's mouth.
Asuma had a different story. "There's that cold look in his eyes again, like the one he used to have when he just entered the Anbu. I ran into him in the streets a couple of times and I tried to get his attention, but he just looks at me blankly and continues to walk away."
According to Asuma, who heard the information from his father, Kakashi and Rin continued to request for S rank mission after mission.
"I saw them once," Asuma told them. "When my dad is going over the mission details with them, they don't even bat an eye. One of their missions was to assassinate an S class missing nin and they didn't even seem to be a bit fazed. The two of them have completed all of the S class missions that the village has to offer."
"Is that normal?" Kurenai questioned. "I know they used to go on suicide missions all the time, but that was when they were a four man team. Three man team at their least."
Asuma shrugged. "My old man wanted to assign other members to Kakashi's squad, but he rejected it."
All that Kurenai and Izumi had to share was that Rin was nowhere to be seen. Either she wasn't in the village, or she was drowning herself at the hospital.
"The hospital staff has come to me to express their concerns about Rin," Izumi said. "She's always pulling double shifts, even after missions. And she looks so tired all the time, like she's about to fall over any minute."
"And Naruto complains all the time about them not going to visit him," Izumi continued. "I think the last time was a bit before that night happened."
Different stories, same sentiments. The two of them were ignoring everyone.
"They're going to get themselves killed," Kurenai said. "No matter how infallible the two think they are. I'm worried that something will happen to them before they realize it."
The four of them found themselves at the Hokage's office, catching Hiruzen as he had been standing by the window, staring out at Konoha. The four of them plead their case to the Hokage, citing that it wasn't healthy for them to remain in the Anbu any further.
The Hokage looked conflicted.
"Even if I forcibly discharge them, they won't let it go easily. I'm afraid of what other methods they will use to help themselves cope."
"Going on suicide missions after suicide missions isn't coping, Hokage sama," Izumi protested. "They're only twenty two! Besides Sasuke, they're the only family that I have left and I don't want to lose them too."
No one else wanted to lose them either.
"Perhaps another team," Kurenai suggested. "Their teammates have pulled them out of the darkness before, so maybe another team will help."
"A genin team then?" Hiruzen thoughtfully stroked his beard. "That is if they accept the burdens of being a jonin leader."
While the Hokage may agree with them, it seemed that there wasn't a suitable solution which wouldn't backfire on them.
"Then allow me to join the Anbu, Hokage sama!" Gai declared. "I believe I can pull my eternal rival out of the darkness!"
Before Hiruzen had the opportunity to gently inform Gai that his personality wasn't suited to be in the Anbu Black Ops - he didn't think Kakashi nor Rin were also suitable due to their kind hearts - the Anbu Commander rushed into the Hokage's office. In all of his years as Hokage, and during Minato's term as well, Hiruzen had never seen Wolf so flustered.
Without caring that there were non Anbu members present, Wolf proceeded to blurt out the information, while thrusting two pieces of paper at the Hokage.
"Hatake and Nohara submitted their resignations to me this morning!"
While Wolf was more concerned that two of his best Anbu operatives had resigned - the man was secretly hoping that Kakashi would take over his position as commander as he recently hit the ten year mark in service - the others were more relieved that Kakashi and Rin had seen the light. Hiruzen's eyes scanned their resignation letter, which contained nothing more than the usual pleasantries of serving under the Hokage and their wishes to be reinstated as part of the regular jonin forces.
No reason was mentioned for their resignation.
Hiruzen handed the two letters back to Wolf. "See to it that it gets processed and filed away. As of today, Team Ro is disbanded and Kakashi and Rin are to be placed back on the active mission roster."
Wolf didn't argue and teleported out of the room to do as the Hokage had asked.
Kakashi's ten year run in the Anbu was certainly impressive and Rin's six years weren't easily accumulated, but Hiruzen was glad that they had taken the matter into their own hands. The two of them were still young, still full of so much potential to lose themselves in the darkness that loomed over the Anbu.
"Looks like they're back."
This particular mission marked the one thousandth one completed under the status of Team Ro. While Kakashi nor Rin themselves had gone on all one thousand missions, each mission that they executed as Anbu, whether by themselves, in pairs, or as a full team, all counted towards their record. Between the four of them, they had racked up one thousand completed missions to their team name.
And that was when Rin began to wonder if it was time to quit.
With at least a tenth of those one thousand completed missions being marked as S ranked and a good third considered A ranked, it was a miracle that they were still alive. It was a miracle that their sanities were still partly intact.
Being in the Anbu was relentless. Even on days without missions, they still took on surveillance duty around the village. Even at times that were considered to be their breaks, they could still be called in at any time for an emergency. It felt like they had barely any time to breathe before they were being whisked away to complete their next task.
Only three days out of the week did Rin sleep in an actual bed, if not less. They were away from home so much that Rin hadn't even bothered to find a new apartment, not after moving out from her place. Even a year later, there were still some boxes piled up in the corner of Kakashi's apartment, still left unopened.
Seven days a week, one hundred and sixty eight hours in a week and Rin felt like she was working over one hundred of those hours. The only times that she had to rest were to sleep and to eat, and even then that was debatable. Was it really resting when they were perched on top of tree branches, attempting to sleep but also be on their guard for an unexpected ambush? Was it really resting when they ate food pills in the cold as they waited for their target to appear?
To put it simply, Rin was tired. Rin wanted - no, needed - a change, but she didn't want to ditch Kakashi in the Anbu by himself. Not when she knew the two of them were the only ones anchoring each other to reality.
As the client of their last mission told them, they were only twenty two. They still had a whole life ahead of them, if they didn't dwell on a shinobi's lower than average lifespan. If they didn't dwell on the fact that their careers as a shinobi typically ended between the ages of thirty to thirty five, save for the few, who take up important mantles in various departments of Konoha.
Yet neither of them really could imagine their life as a simple civilian.
At the same time, Rin's medical knowledge told her that they would be forced to become civilians by the age of twenty five if they didn't quit their current lifestyle of taking on high adrenaline, injury prone, suicide missions, one after another.
"I'm thinking about resigning from the Anbu," Rin stated out of the blue to Kakashi, who was sprawled all over his couch, flipping through the pages of a book that explained the theories of jutsu creation.
Kakashi raised an eyebrow. "Oh?"
"You know we can't go on like this forever and I think we've been stupid and selfish for long enough."
"You're right," Kakashi said, nodding. "In retrospect, the decisions that we made in the past year are pretty stupid. It's not like they're dead, just...with a bit of their reputation smeared."
What an understatement. Rin resisted the urge to let out a sarcastic chortle.
"Not just that," Rin admitted. "But I think this incident has made me realize that Konoha isn't all that innocent like I thought it was. I suppose that I was naive to think that Konoha wouldn't make their own shinobis to kill their own, to spread fake information to manipulate the public…"
"Ah. Let's resign then."
Kakashi had understood what Rin was trying to say because a small part of him felt the same way. Even if the Sandaime had mostly good intentions and kept the village's safety at the forefront of his mind, how could they really trust him? Were they going to be asked to assassinate Itachi and Shisui if word arrived that they had killed a Konoha shinobi regardless of the reason? Were they going to be asked to turn on their own, just like the villagers turned on his father, then the Uchiha clan? Neither of them wanted to stay in the Anbu long enough to find out.
And neither of them could forget that they were still living on borrowed peace.
But maybe, just maybe, the willingness to become the village's scapegoat was the epitome of what it meant to be a shinobi. To protect the village from the shadows is the mark of a true shinobi, as Shisui once said.
Perhaps for once, the two of them just wanted a chance to be selfish. A chance to experience what the rest of the world had to offer. A chance to amend the broken friendships and make up for all of the lost time. A chance to accomplish their own goals and dreams.
A chance to properly live.
A/N: Hi again!
Forgive me for forgetting to update last week; sadly, it's finals week :/.
Anyways, I've already written a good chunk of part 2 but I'm not sure how I feel about it lol. There's a couple of subplots that I never addressed, so I couldn't really end it at the last chapter, could I? :) Plus, my favorite chapter of the entire story is coming up in 2 chapters, so I'm super excited to share that one with you guys.
From here on out, there's going to be time skips but I won't necessarily mention "a year later" or so. I think you'll be able to figure it out based on how old Naruto/Sasuke are. And we are approaching the start of canon, but events won't necessarily follow canon. :) Any predictions on what will be changed?
Next chapter is called A Shinobi's Guide on How to Live a Proper Life.
Sorry for the boring chapter, but thanks so much for reading! You guys keep inspiring me to write more. :) I will diligently write once finals are over, I promise! Until next time!
-MM