Chapter 20: Guy Talk

As the water dripping down his hair, he couldn't help but be reminded of the rain he had ran through with Mina. His mind then carried on to remembering sitting on the bus with her, they locked eyes and he had become unaware of anything else, just those eyes. She didn't react to him, even as she whispered his name, even as he moved in closer. He cut the thought short before it changed from memory to fantasy by lifting his head and getting the full blast of shower water onto his face instead.

He couldn't seem to shake the thought; it had popped up continuously ever since he and Mina had parted ways on Saturday after their day out. He understood it to some extent. Mina was a pretty girl and he had been alone with her, while the thought sent him into a deep blush, it was only natural that he had imagined what it might be like to kiss her. But what he didn't understand was the part of him that resisted it. The part of him that played it off after the sun light hit him. That convinced him he shouldn't mention it, to instead keep quiet and pretend that it never happened. That demanded he not play out how he really wanted that memory to end.

Something about it was wrong. He felt it instinctively. It was a feeling he didn't like but knew he had to trust. He just had to make sure he figured it out before the weekend, when he was going out with her again.

He stopped getting distracted and quickly finished his shower, his body twinging in pain as he moved about, washing himself. He had gone at it pretty hard today, remembering that he had failed his exam after all. There was no time to be slacking off. Not when he had promised to work many times harder than anyone else. There was still so much ground between him and everyone else in the class that the idea of slacking off was just unthinkable. He had to get it done and remind himself what he was doing, why he was here and where he is headed. There wasn't time for him to be getting so distracted.

As he began to dry himself off, he remembered another distraction he was going to have to consider. Mina's demand. They had texted each other a few times throughout the day as they both had to catch up on his homework having worked and played all day yesterday. He wasn't sure why he didn't suggest they do it together, but then she hadn't either. Then out of the blue she had shot a message with her demand attached, born out of the boredom that was schoolwork. She wanted a surprise that she was enjoy. That was all. It was so simple and yet so difficult for him to think of. He had blown his best move with the stadium as that was one hundred and ten percent Mina. Now he needed to think up something else. Still, as forfeits went, he couldn't really complain, in fact if anything it was kind of a fun challenge for him to think about. After all, he had already given her two surprises in the necklace and the stadium, what was another one?

Finishing drying himself off he put on some clothes and headed back to his room for a quick pit stop, dropping off his towel and toiletries then heading downstairs to fix up some dinner. He entered the main kitchen area walking in on Kirishima, Iida and Todoroki.

"…that's when I thought to myself, there's just no other way to go about it!" Kirishima declared enthusiastically. Currently he and Iida seemed to be in the process of cooking something while Todoroki sat patiently waiting on one of the stools, listening with his usual neutral expression. Iida was stood over the stove, keeping an eye on whatever it was he was cooking, one hand on his chin as he seemed to be considering what Kirishima was saying, he noticed Midoriya enter and turned raising a hand in greeting

"Ah, good evening Midoriya-kun!" he called, drawing attention of the other two to his presence.

"Good evening" he replied with a raised hand of his own "What are you guys talking about?" he asked. Kirishima seemed to light up.

"I was just telling Iida about what I've learned by teaming up with Todoroki in our battle against you and Tokoyami!" he answered with an energised fist raised, as though he were seizing something before him.

"Ah, yeah, that sure was an intense battle" Midoriya chuckled, recalling it. Iida fixed the position of his glasses.

"What happened in this bout?" he inquired looking between the other three boys.

"Basically, Midoriya kept him and Tokoyami mobile while they used dark shadow to sniff us out then attack. We had to apprehend them while causing minimal damage, pretty tough for us two" he pointed with a thumb toward himself, twisting his wrist to then indicate Todoroki too.

"I see" Iida considered thoughtfully, his hand returning to his chin "Indeed that condition locks down Todoroki-kun's overwhelming power and forces you to control your movements, limiting them too I suspect" Kirishima nodded.

"If only you knew, normally I'd just smash everything down to find them"

"But if you did that in the real world that would cause casualties" Iida cautioned.

"Yeah, I guess, so this training was super useful, it was just really hard too. Even would we cornered them Midoriya was crazy tough to subdue!" he grinned, with a nod toward Midoriya "But me and Todoroki were tougher!"

"With Todoroki-kun's flames it was difficult to cover Tokoyami-kun, and then you in your hardened mode to deal with… I'm not sure I could take you in a straight fight anyway. I'd probably have to take a leaf out of Bakugo's book and try to outlast you. Which I couldn't do with Todoroki-kun cutting off our retreat with ice." Midoriya finished with a sigh while smiling.

"But yeah, it really shown me that I need to work on training myself even harder to keep up with everyone. I'm still such a long way off of Crimson Riot that there's no way I can afford to let up now!" Kirishima added, dishing his food onto a plate.

"It's indeed splendid to have an idol you wish to emulate. It helps you clearly see the road before you and leaves you the problem of simply walking it, as difficult a task as just this is." Iida commented, thinking of his brother.

"It's also important to stay true to that path" he added, as his couldn't help but recall that he had not confronted with the reality following his brother's encounter with that villain.

"Yeah, that's why I figure I need to up my game after Midoriya gave me both the run around and then a heck of a fight after we managed to corner him. He's a hell of a fighter!" Kirishima praised, with a glance back toward Midoriya. "I figure I gotta put in more time strengthening my body and quirk for now as my primary goal"

"While strategy might also be a worthwhile consideration, I don't think you can go wrong with focusing on your strength as a hero." Iida agreed.

"I'm not sure it's that simple" Todoroki spoke up, causing all eyes to fall on him as he seemed to look through the counter. "I think that focusing on just your strength probably isn't the best way to go about it and will cause you to lose sight of other ideals you have"

A silence followed; the normally quiet Todoroki mostly just kept his opinions to himself. Midoriya couldn't even recall the last time he had contradicted someone. It was probably in that alleyway with Iida and himself.

"What makes you say that, Todoroki-kun?" Iida puzzled, breaking the silence but unable to understand Todoroki's meaning.

Todoroki considered how best to explain himself. He wasn't the articulate type who could quickly and easily convey his meaning, especially if it had emotions involved, which was unavoidable when any topic skirted his father. This one hit dead on too. He couldn't count all the times he saw his father, covered in sweat, alone in his gym. He had sought strength all his life. He had found it, that much was certain, but it also looked to Shoto like that was all he had found.

"I think it's important to stay properly orientated. I spend most of my time until recently just chasing strength and didn't realise how alike I was becoming to someone I hated." He looked up toward Midoriya "It started back at the sports festival, thanks to you"

Midoriya shuffled on the spot, unsure of how he was supposed to respond to that. Todoroki looking back down in thought and continued on

"It was after I reconnected with my mother that I started to see that as much as I have goals I want to reach. I have things I want to avoid as well. For me, I needed grounding to something to avoid that"

Iida nodded and related the sentiment to his own dark encounter with the Hero Killer. He had become consumed by vengeance and in doing so had totally lost sight of becoming like his brother, an upstanding hero. No upstanding hero would be so consumed by vengeance. Subconsciously he rubbed his shoulder where he had been stabled. That was why he wasn't getting himself fully healed until he was sure that he had learned the lesson that so desperately needed learning.

"That makes sense." He thought aloud "While it's important to have a vision of your goal, it's equally important to have a vision on what you need to avoid becoming"

"Yeah, something like that" Todoroki agreed, moving toward the kitchen units as Kirishima finally finished with his own food and moved to one of the nearby tables to eat from.

"So, what? You're saying that I gotta have two visions then?" Kirishima asked as he began to eat.

"Sort of. It's like having an idea of what you want but also the idea of where it can go wrong and you end up with a situation you never want to be in" Iida explained as he adjusted his glasses, a habit had a tendency of doing when he was thinking.

"Right. Something that makes sure that you are doing everything for the right reasons, then?" Kirishima posed.

"Yeah, that's exactly it." Iida agreed with an affirmative nod.

As the conversation unfolded Midoriya couldn't help but relate so much of it to his own recent experiences. It made sense that his classmates were going through the same struggles but at the same time they had always felt so personal that it was surprising all the same to hear them talk about it. He wished they would keep going, wondering if they too were struggling to find the right balance in their lives right now, especially after moving into the dorms.

"Midoriya-kun? Are you alright?" Iida inquired, studying his expression from across the room.

"Oh, y-yeah." Midoriya muttered "Just odd hearing you guys talk about something I was thinking about recently. I guess" he admitted. Iida smiled at hearing this.

"I suppose it's going to happen that we are each questioning the fundamentals like this. Especially at such a turbulent time" he reassured. He had his own fair share of doubts since moving into the dorms about the future, both his own and in the greater scheme of things. Even so, he took pride in being the class rep and he would guide his classmates as best as he was able.

"Say, you guys ever struggle with balancing everything?" Midoriya ventured, deciding that surely there was no harm in just asking the question outright.

"Absolutely. I have gone through several failed schedules since moving in. Each time the balance is disrupted by events or classmates or just sheer inconvenience at my own ineptitude at planning. I am on my 6th calendar and it's finally looking like this one will stick" He droned on. Midoriya chuckled and held up his hands

"I mean, like the right balance in like, how we were saying?" he rephrased.

"Oh" Iida nodded. Then shook his head "Not really, no. Not since Hosu."

"I-I see. That's good" was all Midoriya could think to comment.

"Oh, for fucks sake!" A familiar roar came from the door as Bakugo waltzed in "You're not still trying to get your shit together are you?" he hissed. Midoriya turned uneasily and Iida straighten up and regarded his classmate harshly.

"Bakugo! This is not acceptable language!"

"Can it!" Bakugo retorted harshly, immediately claiming the space as Iida was just finishing up.

"Midoriya was waiting next" Iida insisted. Bakugo grunted and leered up at the taller boy, glanced over at Midoriya then back to Iida

"No way am I sitting through his drivel" he dismissed and continued.

"It's fine. We were talking anyway" Midoriya said, before Iida could respond. He was just killing time anyway.

"Midoriya? Are you sure?" Iida asked, glancing between the two, uncertainly.

"Yeah, it's fine" Midoriya insisted as Bakugo continued without so much as a second look.

"Anyway, what were you saying?" Iida asked as he came and sat beside Midoriya and across from Kirishima.

"Oh nothing. Just, it feels lately like somethings out of sorts with me. When you guys started talking about the balance it just felt like that was resonating or something" he did his best to explain. Iida listened as he ate, not taking his eyes off Midoriya for more than a moment at a time.

"Like, what exactly?" Kirishima pipped up.

"That's it, I'm not really sure. Like something is holding me back, I guess?" he struggled to explain.

"Holding you back? Like physically?" Kirishima pressed, confused as his own personal experience with Midoriya recently did not reflect this.

"No…" Midoriya dismissed.

"Mentally?" Iida suggested.

"I guess so, sort of" Midoriya conceded. As he thought of it, he realised it was more emotional than intellectual, but he didn't want to admit something quite that specific. Especially not around Bakugo.

Bakugo growled. His version of a groan as he was in earshot of their conversation.

"Is it something you can just ignore?" Kirishima supposed, then taking in another mouthful of food.

"I've been trying but it seems to mess with me anyway, just stuff coming to mind unexpectedly. Distracting me from what I'm doing." He recalled that scene coming to mind several times in such a short period of time.

"Then it something you can work out?" Iida advised.

"Not as such, it's not like it's a problem in that sense or anything" Midoriya rested his head in his hand as he relaxed on the table in thought.

Bakugo growled in the background again.

This time Iida turned toward him.

"Bakugo-kun! If you aren't going to help, would you please be quiet!" he demanded. Bakugo snapped around and shot him a glare.

"Sure, I got a solution for ya" he drawled, he snatched a post it note off the fridge, kept there for food labels until people worked out just not to touch it if it wasn't yours, and then then accompanying pen and scribbled something down. He crumbled it up and threw it across the room at Midoriya, chucking the pen aside.

"Give that to the hero support course for your suit and you're good to go" he sneered.

Midoriya regarded the note that had bounced off of his head and realised he probably shouldn't open it. Against his better judgement he peeled it open. He signed, re-crumpled it and pocketed it for the trash later.

"What did it say?" Kirishima asked, interested.

"Nothing helpful, no doubt!" Iida declared loud enough for Bakugo to hear clearly.

"Yeah, but, what did it say?" Kirishima persisted. Midoriya sighed

"Two testicles" Midoriya muttered quietly. Iida gasped in outrage while Kirishima choked on his food and laughed.

What followed was Iida yelling across the room at Bakugo but being drown out by Kirishima who howled with laughter. Midoriya sighed and realised that unless he wanted to get really personal and specific, he was going to have to figure it out on his own. He stood to leave.

"I'll come back later" he told Iida.

"Are you sure? We can still discuss the issue if you need to" Iida insisted

"Thanks, but I think maybe it's one of those things I have to figure out by myself" he assured his friend. While Bakugo certainly didn't help matters, the truth was he wasn't getting anywhere before either.

"I understand. Well, if you need help, I am always available" Iida added with a smile.

"Me too, and sorry. I just wasn't expecting that" Kirishima breathed, pink in the face still.

"Thanks again, and don't worry about it" Midoriya called as he got up and left the room. As he rounded the stairs he hear someone call him.

"Deku!" It was Bakugo. He eyes dropped and he sighed.

"What is it?" he called, turning. Bakugo stood some feet away, hands in his pockets, looking off the the side.

"You got the same problem as she did"

Midoriya blinked. She?

"Do you mean Mina?" he frowned in bewilderment. The how and when running through his mind.

"She had the same look, same problem, same shit." He grumbled, then looked at Midoriya directly "you two better to sort that crap out"

Midoriya blinked again. What was going on here?

"What do you mean?" he was dumbfounded. Was Bakugo screwing with him or actually trying to help?

"I mean get your fucking shit straight!" he roared, turning in annoyance "It pissed me off that she was actually that strong yet that crap at sorting it out. Don't you fuckin' dare go getting soft on me because you don't got the balls to do what you gotta do" he began walking away.

"What?" Midoriya stammered "What!?" he called after Bakugo.

"I don't know or care what!" He snapped back "That's your problem. Don't make it mine, or I'll give you a goddamn problem!" with that he continued, rounded the corner back into the kitchen.

Midoriya was lost at what just happened. He could only guess that was Bakugo's actual attempt at giving helpful advice. After their one on one battle he had become less hostile, but this was getting weird. What did he mean she had the same problem? When would they have ever even spoken?

He shook his head and begun to make his way back to his room, instead thinking of what Todoroki had been talking about. That had really resonated with him, but he couldn't exactly explain why. It caused him to think of his conversation with All Might, as though there were somehow related in a way he couldn't quite understand.

He must have been talking about his father when he was talking about being like someone and not orientated. It was easy enough to see why you wouldn't want to end up like Endeavour, even if he was the number two hero. His reputation, from what Midoriya could see, was entirely accurate to who the man was.

Not like All Might at all. All Might was the perfect hero after all. Midoriya had been set on that path since day one. As he learned more about All Might's true history there were certain things he did want to avoid. Getting organs destroyed was one. Perhaps the only one. Everything else about his life was pretty okay, wasn't it?

"No" a small yet powerful voice insisted. He knew instinctively what this thought was. It was the same part of him that was interfering with his thoughts on Mina and reliving that memory.

Why 'no'? He wondered to himself. He stepped inside his room and recounted everything he knew about All Might, looking for some detail he had been overlooking. He just couldn't think of it.

"What am I missing?" he muttered to himself. What possible connected was there between an aspect of All Might and some action that prevented him from so much as imagining what could have happened?

"The reason is simple…" All Might's voice echoed in his mind. That line was familiar. Something he had said recently… As he thought back on it and recalled that line and what followed the pieces began to fall into place.

He knew now why he shouldn't have tried to kiss her. It was so obvious. How had it taken him this long to reach such a simple answer?