Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars or any of the recognisable characters of the franchise. This story is purely for entertainment.

Chapter 32

Poe was sitting opposite Ben. He could see that Ben, despite the remarkable recovery speed, was still weak but apparently, he refused to stay in bed. They came back to Cantonica only 3 days ago. And today when he went to visit Ben in the Canton Medical Clinic, he learnt that on his own request Ben was moved to the nearby hotel.

He was relieved that Quan decided stay in the same hotel with Ben but came over immediately to check up on them both. Poe could hardly believe that Temini was nowhere around as he became almost inseparable with Quan. The boy loved listening about different plants and their properties that the medic was researching. He wasn't however surprised when Ben's first question when he entered was about Rey.

Poe shook his head. The relationship between those two was the weirdest thing he had ever witnessed. As soon as Rey regained her consciousness on Ahch-To, she asked about Ben and she didn't leave Ben's side until they were really worried about her. Especially that Chewbacca's death shook her to the core. But the moment poor Ben woke up and said her name, she slapped him hard across his face and left the room. She had never visited him after that. Poe tried to talk to her but she claimed she didn't want to see that manipulative and egocentric monster (meaning Ben) ever again!

'Is it still about your agreement with Larma?' – Poe couldn't believe Rey would still be making so much fuss about it.

'I think so…' – Ben sighed.

'Man, you messed up.' – Poe finally said.

'I know…but I wouldn't change it even if I could. She was safer this way. That's all that matters…. still I don't understand how she found out?'

Poe felt a pang of guilt. He was so glad that Ben respected his promise about not reading his mind. He cleared his voice. – 'Women…who can understand…'

Quan interrupted. – 'Just listen to yourselves. You two are ridiculous. I warned you Ben that something like this may happen so now, deal with it. She loves you. She will forgive you….some day.'

Quan started chuckling. Poe looked at him surprised. He had not seen him so amused and…happy?...yes, happy since he lost his family.

Ben looked as if he was stunned as well. – 'She loves me?' – He repeated after a while looking from Poe to Quan and back.

'You have to ask? Of course, she does. She even said it. I heard it…that day when we thought you died. It was actually heart wrenching to watch her angst.' – Poe knew he would never be able to forget that day.

Quan's mouths twisted with disdain. – 'I told you med droids are useless. No one wanted to listen.'

'How was a droid to know that Ben could come back to life like that?' – Poe tried to reason.

'Exactly my point. A droid doesn't know Ben or the Force at all. They don't treat anyone in a personal and holistic way. There is more to us then just bones and cells. But it's all cases and technology to them.' – Quan was on his favourite subject now.

Poe started wondering when he became this talkative.

'I think we need to leave this discussion for some other time. It's too heavy of a topic for today. Do you fancy a drink? I have a day off.' – Quan wasn't a big fan of their drinking sessions and Poe winked at Ben as he saw the medic almost hectically leaving the room. He could see that Quan's leg wasn't completely healed yet.

Ben seemed to be out of his deep thoughts because he smiled at him. – 'Why you keep trying to poison your body this way is beyond me. I thought I proved to you that this stuff just doesn't work on me.'

Poe looked at him innocently. – 'My friend, I didn't say anything about alcohol. I meant…tea…or something... You're still officially recovering from serious injuries after all.' – He smirked.

'I thought we were not friends.' – Ben retorted in a flippantly manner, visibly enjoying their banter.

'I dare to differ.' – Poe could see Ben was surprised by his honesty and sudden change of tone. He owed Ben.

Ben struggled trying to keep it light. – 'Since when?'

Poe looked Ben straight in the eye. – 'Since I pointed my gun at you…back then on the bridge…and I realised I wouldn't be able to use it.'

...

Poe was his friend and Rey loved him! She loved him! The truth was slowly sinking in, overtaking his whole being and resonating with his own feelings - feelings that he kept supressed…feelings he should still try to control…for her sake. He was restless. He waited for a moment when he was finally alone and left the hotel.

The sun was slowly ending its daily journey and was now rushing to be welcomed by the friendly embrace of the horizon. But he could barely see anything around him.

He was unsuccessfully reaching out to Rey through the force quite often during the time when she was avoiding him. Either he was so weak that she found it so easy to block him out or she was so strong now after the stunt they did together on Ahch-To. Whatever the reason he couldn't get through to her. Maybe it was better this way… He actually should let it go. Let her go.

But those words…She loved him. He walked slowly, his head and face hidden under the hood as he didn't want to draw any attention to himself. He kept reaching out, pushed forward, driven by those three words. His search was more determined now. He acted more on an instinct. His steps were directed by some urgency that was now growing in him with every step he took. She loved him! He left the buzz of the city behind him and the Force seemed to draw him to a grassy hill just outside it…It seemed to push him forward until he could see the fallen tree trunk and her slender body restfully leaning against it. She was seating with her knees crossed, enjoying the touch of the last golden rays of the setting sun dancing playfully on her face.

He had seen her doing the same thing on Dantooine. He was jealous she knew how to enjoy little things. He was jealous of the sun…that it could caress her face like that. He could watch her like this for eternity and was almost angry when she stirred and opened her eyes to look directly at him.

'What do you want Ben?' – She slowly stood up.

He was standing just few steps away from her. What did he want? That was a very good question. He was afraid of what he really wanted. He didn't deserve it.

'What do you want?' – She repeated tiredly and opened up her mind.

And then he understood. She knew what he wanted and she was ready to give it to him. She was tired of his refusal to face the truth, exhausted to see his struggle.

'I want YOU!' – He burst out, not wanting to see in her the same anguish that tormented him.

Saying it out loud set him free. He closed the space between them and encircled her with his arms. This is where she belonged. He drew her face towards his and claimed her lips hungrily and she responded immediately. He could feel her arms grasping his waist and desperately drawing him nearer. The warmth, her warmth seemed to spread out into his all being – almost drowning him.

And yet, he wanted and needed more. He greedily claimed every part of her mouth until he couldn't breathe anymore. He had to slow down, reluctantly his lips departed from hers. He cupped her face with his hands. She was looking at him with such trust. The corners of her lips rose up spreading apart in a gentle smile. Her lips were so red and so inviting.

'I want you.' – He repeated. – 'Only you...I love you Rey…more than you can imagine…' – He was tracing the shape of her cheek bones with his thumbs. – 'But this is not going to be easy. There is no straightforward happily ever after for me...with me. At some point I will have to stand a trial, pay for my sins…I don't want you to suffer…you don't deserve going through all of it with me.'

His eyes were willing her to understand what he was saying to her. He was still trying to let her go if she wanted. He was begging her to free herself because he was not strong enough to push her away.

Her face was serious now. – 'It is a right thing to be ready to accept the justice. But if you are eager to do that, you should be also willing to accept forgiveness.'

'Rey…' – His hands fell down. He knew he was losing this fight.

She stubbornly refused his pleas. – 'I belong with you.'