Chapter Thirty-Two
"So she's on her way here, now?" Penelope and Morgan had just walked into the BAU, having arrived back from the UK to news that Emily was currently in the air, following them across the Atlantic. JJ nodded. Morgan set down his carry on bag on top of his suitcase, parking himself on the edge of his desk. "Her mom's really sick, huh?"
"She had a heart attack." JJ said, solemnly. "I've been in touch with the hospital at Emily's request, told them to keep me updated. I'm going to meet her at the airport when she arrives and take her straight there. I already called Rossi, since he and Crystall are away this weekend. He said Emily's welcome to one of his guest rooms, so she at least has somewhere to stay without having to get a hotel."
"Well, I never thought I'd be sad to see my little pussycat." Garcia's face was one of shock and sadness. "But, Elizabeth, is she going to be okay?"
JJ splayed her hands in a gesture of helplessness. "All they could tell me was what they told Em. She had a heart attack and was admitted last night. She's been asking for Emily. They don't know much more, although they're monitoring her, obviously."
"Monitoring who?" Hotch had appeared from his office, and was staring down at a file in his hand. JJ looked from Penelope, to Hotch, to Morgan, and back to her boss, uncertain of what to say.
"Emily's on her way over, Hotch." Morgan cleared up. The Unit chief lifted his head, the file in his hands all but forgotten. "Her mom's sick. Heart attack. She's at Mary Washington, so Em's on her way to see her. Should be here in a couple of hours."
"I'm going to pick her up and take her there." JJ repeated her earlier statement. Hotch barely blinked, he just nodded.
"Give her and Elizabeth my best, please." He said, shortly, before continuing on his path straight out of the office, to wherever he was going with that file.
"Give her my best?" Penelope repeated, incredulously. JJ gave a helpless shrug and Morgan ran a hand over his face, exasperated by his boss, exhausted by the journey and concerned for Emily. He sat a moment longer, then vaulted to his feet, jogging in the same direction Hotch had headed. Anderson was on his way into the bullpen and Morgan caught the door as it swung shut behind him.
"Hotch!" He called down the corridor. His boss was already waiting at the elevator, and Morgan caught up to him just as the doors swung open.
"Morgan, I have a meeting." Hotch said, stepping into the lift. Morgan made the split decision and joined him.
"She texted you, man." He said, catching his breath. "She said she text you when she landed, just like you asked. She said you never text her back. And now you're sending her your 'best'? What is going on with you two?"
Knowing it was none of his business, and that Hotch would have no problem telling him so, Morgan expected the older man to round on him, to give him a piece of his mind, to tell him to stay out of it. Instead, Hotch was staring at him, frowning, almost confused. Then he reached into the pocket of his blazer, taking out his new phone. He unlocked it and Morgan watched as he scrolled through his messages. Even from a foot away, Morgan could see the red exclamation mark beside the message he pulled up.
Not Delivered.
"Dammit." Hotch muttered under his breath, slipping the phone back into his pocket. The bell dinged and the elevator's doors slip open. Hotch cast a glance back at him. "Thank you, Morgan."
Morgan wasn't entirely sure what he was being thanked for, as he watched Hotch leave.
The flight was the longest Emily had ever taken. She commandeered the Interpol plane, but even then, the flight seemed to take much longer than getting to the states usually did. She called JJ again from the air, just to check in, but the blonde had no updates for her. Then she called Rossi.
"Hey, bambina," His voice was sombre on the other end of the line, and Emily knew JJ had beaten her to it. "I already told JJ you can have the house for the weekend. You're welcome to the guest room for as long as you need it, of course. Crystall and I are in Vegas for the weekend, though, so feel free to come and go as you please-"
"Thanks, Rossi." She interrupted him, grateful but agitated and on edge. "Is Hotch working this weekend?"
"When is he ever not working?" Rossi made a good point, but Emily was reassured nonetheless. The last thing she needed this weekend was an awkward confrontation. If Hotch was working, she knew to stay away from the office and then she wouldn't even have to see him. He wouldn't even have to know she was visiting. She would be back in the UK before Hotch ever knew anything different. Back with Isla, who had turned up to her empty apartment with Indian from Emily's favourite restaurant, and had left her three voicemails since that Emily couldn't bring herself to listen to. They would all be supportive and heartfelt and 'don't worry about me' and Emily couldn't stand it. She couldn't stand it because ever since she'd gotten the call about her mother, ever since she'd made up her mind to fly back to Virginia, the only thing Emily could think of was that he was there. That, for the first time in six months, they would be in the same place, at the same time. So, no, she couldn't see him.
"You make a good point." She replied, without missing a beat. "Okay. I just wanted to say thank you, for letting me stay at the house."
"Anytime, you know you're always welcome, bambina." The softness in his voice made Emily wish he was sitting beside her on the plane, just so she had someone to hug, someone who would take charge and let her not be the responsible one for a while. She thanked him again, quietly, and hung up.
Below her, the Atlantic. Miles and miles of endless blue. Guilt gnawed at her, and Emily didn't know if it was guilt towards Isla or guilt towards her mother, who should be the reason she was so focused on getting to Virginia. She checked her phone again, but JJ had said she would call the moment she heard news about Elizabeth, so Emily knew there was nothing for her to be updated about.
She might die, though. A little voice in her head said. Your mother might finally kick it. Haven't you been asking for that, for years?
No. Emily shook her head, black curls waving around her face. No. Years ago, yes, she and Elizabeth had a tumultuous relationship, at the best of times. They had both grown up since then, Emily liked to believe. Elizabeth had never liked children, not even her own child. She had been a figure, a shadow, a ghost in Emily's young life for so many years that by the time Emily was old enough that Elizabeth finally took notice, it was, mostly, too late. Emily laughed in the face of the rules Elizabeth tried to put down for her. She balked at the plans Elizabeth laid out for her future, as if her absentee mother had any right to do so at all. She resented her postings, those that dragged Emily from one end of the world to the other. Nothing, it seemed, had changed much. Elizabeth was still dragging her across the world.
When her phone rang, Emily pressed it to her ear without checking the caller i.d
"JJ?"
"It's me."
Six months of radio silence hit Emily like a truck. Her words stuck in her throat, her chest squeezed. His voice...she hadn't heard it for six months. The last time she heard it, he had been saying goodbye. I'm over it. I'm over him.
"Hotch. Hi." She said, shortly. "I'm waiting for a call, I can't really-"
"I did text you." She halted, waiting for him to continue, shocked by the statement, confused by the insistence and angry that he thought it was an appropriate time to bring it up. "I got your text, the one about you landing safely. I text you right back. I thought you were ignoring me," She listened, intently, bemused by the entire situation. "I didn't want to overstep, I wanted to let you move on with your life, if that's what you wanted. But I checked today and that message I sent to you never delivered. I don't know what happened. Bad cell reception? I don't know." He sounded as relieved as she felt. "I thought you'd cut me out."
"Yeah," She spoke, finally. "Yeah, I thought the same."
"Stupid." Hotch laughed down the phone. "So, what do you think? Can I see you this weekend?"
"No." She spoke far too quickly, and the silence on the other end of the line told her it wasn't the answer he'd thought he would get. "I mean, I-uh, I'm going to be with my mom. I'm not here for a social visit, you know, Hotch? Maybe next time I'm back."
"Sure." He said, shortly. "Sure. Please give me best to your mom, Emily." The phone clicked off before she could reply and Emily took it from her ear, staring at it for a moment. She pressed it to her forehead, then dropped it into the seat beside her.
"We will never work, Hotch." She muttered, to herself. "We just won't."
"JJ!" Emily practically ran into the blonde's outstretched arms, and JJ clamped them around her tightly. She let her stay there long enough for Emily to compose herself; the tears that had been threatening since she'd said goodbye to Penelope and Morgan earlier, plus the exhaustion from the days worth of travel, made it impossible for her to speak for a moment. So JJ just hugged her, and gave her the moment. "Thank you."
Whatever she was thanking her for, whether it was the hug, or picking her up from the airport, or arranging everything with Rossi, JJ didn't care. It was so good to have Emily back that she didn't care.
"It's so good to see you." She said, when Emily finally pulled back from her. "I just wish it was under better circumstances." Emily nodded, agreeing. "I've not heard from the hospital so as far as I know, your mom is still stable. Did you want to head there straight away?"
"Are you sure?" Emily asked, "It's getting dark out - don't you have to head home? Aren't you guys working a case?"
"Will is fine with Henry and we're off duty for the weekend. Two weeks furlough for the whole team." She rolled her eyes. "It's mandatory, these days. We get it every six months."
"Where was that when I was here?" Emily joked, grabbing the handle of her suitcase and following JJ to the short-stay car park. JJ smiled at her, grateful for her friend back, and wishing it was permanent.
The drive wasn't long, close to half an hour, and Emily chewed her nails the whole time. Truthfully, she would have liked to light up a cigarette, but didn't think JJ would appreciate that in her FBI issued SUV, so she restrained herself. She could smoke later, when she got back to Rossi's. She knew where he kept the good cubans.
Elizabeth looked frail. She was asleep when Emily walked in, JJ a couple of paces behind her. It had only been six months, but Emily could see the difference in her mother. She was pale, thin, her skin pulled tight over her cheekbones, making them more prominent than ever. JJ picked up the chart from the end of the bed and ran her eyes over it.
"Her vitals are all good." She said, softly. Emily nodded, moving to sit in the chair beside Elizabeth's bed. She wanted to reach out and take her hand, but at the same time, a part of her was terrified, terrified of what she would see if Elizabeth woke up. Terrified of the fear Elizabeth would find in her face.
"I've never seen her so...human." It felt so foolish to say out loud, but Elizabeth had always been such an unearthly figure. Always so out of reach, out of touch. The power she exuded had touched everyone around her, including her daughter. Now, she looked weak. Emily felt JJ's hand on her shoulder, and felt a rush of affection towards her friend. "Thank you for being here."
"Of course. I'm going to get you a coffee. I'll be right back."
Passing a doctor on her way in, JJ glanced from Emily, to her mother, then disappeared down the corridor to find a machine. Emily got to her feet and took the hand that was offered by the doctor.
"Miss Prentiss, I assume?" She said, and Emily, in no mood to correct her, simply nodded. "I'm Doctor Louise Maddison, we spoke on the phone."
"Of course," Emily acknowledged, nodding. "Thank you for calling me."
"Your mother is doing well. We've not had any startling test results since she came in to us. It looks as though the heart attack was definitely stress related, because the scans we've done show that your mothers heart is very healthy, for a woman her age, otherwise. So, I'm prescribing some anti-anxiety medication, Beta Blockers, to keep her blood pressure down and hopefully decrease the incidents of abnormal heart rhythm. For now, I think that's all we can do, but we'll continue to monitor her for a few days, just to make sure. And, after that, she'll require regular check ups."
Emily nodded, hearing but not really taking in the information. It sounded like good news, and from the expression on the doctor's face, Emily could see that it was. She sank back into the chair, exhaustion taking over her in her state of relief.
"Thank you, doctor." She repeated, "Thank you very much."
She reached out, taking her mother's hand in her own, and this time, she couldn't stop the tears.
It was several hours later when JJ convinced Emily she needed to get some sleep. Emily agreed, knowing she wouldn't be able to, and let JJ drive her back to Rossi's. The blonde gave her the emergency key that was kept in the office, as well as the keys to Rossi's SUV, should she need to go anywhere, like back to the hospital.
"I'll come over tomorrow, if that's okay? Or I can meet you at the hospital?" Truthfully, JJ had no idea how long Emily would be staying. She assumed it wouldn't be too long, now they knew that Elizabeth was going to be okay, and she knew Emily had someone waiting for her in London. She smiled. "We need a real catch up while you're here. You need to tell me all about Isla."
Isla.
Inside the house, Emily checked the time. It would be the early hours of the morning, now, in London. Isla would be fast asleep. Sighing, Emily set her bag down on the floor and leaned against the front door. She felt equally exhausted and wide awake, all at the same time. It had been the strangest of days, and all of Emily's adrenaline was racing. She headed directly for the antique box in the lounge that she knew Rossi always kept stocked with cigars. Heading outside before she lit it, the garden around lit up, motion sensors detecting her movement up on the deck. The pool glistened in the artificial light. Putting the cigar to her lips, Emily took a long, deep drag and closed her eyes, enjoying the familiar, mechanical motion that came to her easily and without effort. Her neck twinged, the pain of her flight finally catching up with her, and Emily put her hands on the rail, stretching her back out. That only seemed to make it worse. Straightening up, the cool waters of the swimming pool looked ever more enticing with the growing pain in her back.
Stepping out of her shoes, Emily made her way down the steps towards the pool. Her dress, she unzipped from the back, stepping out of it on her way down. When she sank into the water, she closed her eyes and let her head fall back against the side, careful to keep the hand holding the cigar out of the way.
"Emily?"
The cigar fell from her fingers and Emily got a lungful of water. The voice, unexpected and unwelcome, shocked her and Emily found herself choking. A splash nearby, and then a body right beside her, holding her up and patting her back. When she could breath again, she looked up with accusing eyes at Hotch.
"What the hell are you doing here?" She asked, slapping at his arm. He had jumped into the pool still wearing his suit, like an idiot, she noted. That was actually kind of sweet. But stupid. "I told you I didn't want to see you this weekend."
"I know. I decided that wasn't just your choice to make." He raked his dark, soaked hair back from his forehead.
"Oh, so you decided to break into Rossi's house and stalk me, instead?" Emily reached around him, grabbing the now floating and saturated cigar from the top of the pool and throwing it onto the side. "That was a cuban, Hotch! Rossi will kill me if he finds out I wasted it." She whined.
"Stop it, Emily," Hotch caught her wrists with his own and Emily felt the cool tiles of the pool against the small of her back, suddenly all too aware of how see through her white underwear had turned, as a result of her deciding to go swimming in them. It was perfectly fine when she was alone, but now Hotch was staring at her, and he had hold of her wrists, and every thought in her head seemed to revolve around him. "I got a new phone. My old phone fell out of my pocket that night we...that night in your apartment. I couldn't bring myself to come back upstairs, to say goodbye to you all over again. So I got a new one. I wasn't ignoring you. I wasn't trying to cut you out. I thought you were doing that to me, actually. See? It's a misunderstanding."
Emily blinked. "You...you got a new one?" She stared, momentarily perplexed by him, and then burst out laughing. "Hotch," She gasped, in between the laughter, "That's the stupidest-why wouldn't you just come back upstairs and get your phone?"
His tongue was in her mouth before Emily had the change to protest and it was like she'd been kissing him for years. He released her wrists, his arms moving to wrap around her back, and Emily's hands found their way into his hair. Hotch lifted her, though it took little effort in the water, and Emily wrapped her legs around his waist. Even in the water, she could feel his desire for her grow. Emily moaned into his mouth as she felt him hard against her core.
Eyes snapping open, Emily shoved at his chest.
"Hotch, stop. Stop. I can't."