Chapter Thirty-Four: Battle Birthday and Blowing Off Steam

"He's gone mad with power I tell you, mad!" James shouted in frustration as they walked to class. Several Abraeselt students giggled as they passed them and James' face grew red. Sirius was relieved people weren't giggling at him but he did feel a bit bad for his friend.

Only a bit though, since the fool, who was proving he knew nothing about women, thought that it would be a good idea to pin down a student and complete all the dares on her to just be done with it. The result had been James sounding and looking like a mad man and a very unhappy fifth-year girl telling all her friends about the 'Potter freak'.

"I don't disagree," Sirius mused, glad James was taking this whole being the laughing stock of the Abraeselts in stride. He'd even jokingly said that at least he had Digores's opinions yet to mess up. In fact, James weirdly seemed to be enjoying it.

"He could at least tell us what he's going to do with the cloak."

Sirius nodded vehemently. It was frustrating that Remus had just made a few comments about not knowing what he'd do with it when it was clear he did.

At least Sirius' birthday had been a reprieve, well earned he believed. Sure Sirius loved all his gifts and the small party, which he had wanted to be small, just the Marauders. Regulus had also met up, talked to him for his birthday even giving him a present. It had been going well between them even if his brother had handed him the letter from his mother that she had made him promise to give him 'if Sirius began behaving'.

Sirius had, of course, had ripped it up without opening it but Regulus had kept quiet and they had ended up playing several games of gobstones and laughing like old times. In fact that had almost been the best part of his special day. He also really appreciated the Potters sending him a big box of candy and Mrs. Potter's homemade fudge recipe for his birthday, but that also made him feel sort of bad due to the absence of anything from his parents.

Then again the best part might have been the champion tryouts had been on his birthday meaning they got to watch older students duel epically for several hours and then have another banquet served in honor of the guests, but which had felt like a personal birthday banquet for him.

But what really had been the best gift had indeed been Remus' gift, well the other one besides the nicely knitted Gryffindor sweater. Remus had decided to lift the 'no acting out in class rule' he had tasked them with, and after two whole agonizing days of not causing even a little trouble in class, it had come not a moment too soon.

Sure, it led to several detentions, on his birthday no less! Still, it had been so worth it and felt so good especially when he had caused Lily's spell, altered by his own wand work, to turn her pencil not into a worm as they were supposed to, but instead into a bird that had shat all over the class.

He had obtained a week of detentions from his irritate head of house, but the bird, he had named Fido, had pooped on the head of a particularly stuck up Ravenclaw, making it all the more worth it. Sirius was disappointed when Fido had turned back into a pencil, but as James had solemnly pointed out 'Fido had done his duty well'.

That had caused them to laugh so hard that McGonnagal gave James detention as well, perhaps thinking he had been in on it, only they were both too amused to care. Even Remus had to hide a smirk behind his hand, a smirk that may have led to Lily being frustrated with him, still another perk. It truly had been a magical birthday and Sirius now had a stock of supplies that would serve them well in the war against the girls, which he had declared would take place today, not that the girls knew that. But since he and James still had a whole week of promising not to act out in class it was necessary to do it now.

James was on the same page with him, even if his chivalrous crap made him a bit hesitant to blow off steam by pranking the girls. Still they both really needed to, Sirius especially, since he had realized too late not acting out in class applied to DADA as well, which meant he actually had to listen to their professor's nonsense on respecting dark creatures.

"Oi, we have another visitor today," James whispered as they entered the class. More than one visitor since several older students, fourth years, from the other schools were in the back of the class. All the students had been given open invitations to join in on classes but considering their schools weren't as academically rigorous as Hogwarts few didn't give up after the first few lessons. Sirius wished the fourth years weren't with the second years, although he did like showing off how much better he was than them since it made the teachers even stricter than usual when the other school's students were shadowing. They had to make a 'good impression' as their professors kept reminding them.

Sirius grinned at Lisa who was a very pretty Abraeselt student but she just rolled her eyes at him. Despite only being as good as the second year Hogwart students the Abraeselts could give Lily a run for her money with their eye rolls and sassy hair flips. Sirius had chosen Lisa to ask out to the dance, one of his dares, and was grateful it hadn't resulted in a similar fate to James'.

Still, he was sure he wasn't 'just being cocky' as James would have him believe, and that Lisa had been eyeing him more and more lately. Beside her stood Arja, a serious boy who was the younger brother of the Digores's champion. Because of this everyone wanted to be his friend but he had only befriended the Slytherins, more specifically Severus, the two really hit it off. So of course Sirius loathed him.

"Now everyone take your seats. Today is a special class."

Sirius did so wishing he could goof off in class. He chanced a glance at Remus who looked very pale all of sudden, and gave a mocking impression of Arja to James who snickered appreciatively. He expected Remus to catch him at it, to shake his head with the mild disapproval he had when Sirius toed the line on his promise, but he didn't seem to notice. Sirius tried to think back to lunch and if Remus had eaten anything only they still had weeks until the end of the month and Remus' disappearance, but something was certainly up with him.

"Alright everyone I'd like to introduce Mr. Howells who is an expert on nocturnal creatures."

"Hello everyone nice to meet you."

Mr. Howells was a boring looking man. Average build and height and there wasn't anything even remarkably interesting about him at all. He droned on, at least it sounded like that to Sirius, about nocturnal patterns and how that had to do with wizards defending themselves against creatures.

He was alright, Sirius supposed, but he had grown used to being wary of any guest Professor Corbyn brought in, not wanting to be caught dead actually liking a dark creature.

By the end of the class, Sirius had to admit the man was sort of interesting. He had a sense of humor that he could appreciate and better yet he was just a human expert of the topic.

"Now Mr. Howells will be visiting us a few more times to discuss some other topics later in the year. Everyone, please give him a round of applause."

They did, even the Slytherins found the unassuming man interesting to some degree. Anyone who could make a lecture on the proper incantations to use when trying to decide what a dark creature was, based on its feces, warranted some respect.

Sirius had forgotten Remus looked pale and he must have not eaten since he ran into one of the desks on the way out tipping it over and sprawling himself on the floor, like the clutz he could sometimes be.

"Careful mate."

James who was closer helped Remus up who certainly seemed peckish.

"No harm done. Are you alright Mr. Lupin?" Professor Corbyn asked, looking concerned. Sirius saw that Mr. Howell was looking at Remus strangely but his friend nodded mumbling an apology and they all left quickly.

"What's wrong Remus?" Sirius asked, surprised to find his friend shaking.

"Are you getting sick?" James asked, still grasping Remus' arm to keep him upright. He placed a hand to his forehead. "Yeah, you have a fever."

"Trying to get out of pranking the girls are you?" Sirius teased but Remus didn't respond, seemingly dazed. "Let's take him to Madam Pomfrey."

"I'll take him, you two have to get everything ready," Peter explained, letting Remus drape his arm around his squat shoulders. Sirius wondered if Peter could actually get Remus to the hospital ward as their now clearly sick feeling friend was leaning heavily on Peter who wasn't exactly...strong. But Sirius figured it would be alright, mostly because he didn't want to delay the fun pranks any longer.

"Alright, thanks Peter good luck. Feel better Remus," James called and the four friends headed their two separate ways.

"You think this is him disappearing again?" James asked, confused after they walked in silence for a bit.

"No, I think this is different. He probably just caught a cold or something, he gets sick a lot."

"Yeah….but well he seemed fine before class," James mused and Sirius realized he had a point. Remus had seemed fine before class, then again he was good at hiding when he felt sick.

"He could have been faking you know how he is."

"Or it just came on fast. One time I had the stomach flu mate, and let me tell you it came fast and strong out of nowhere."

Sirius laughed, elbowing James.

"Gross."

"Not as gross as the potion that made me feel better. Yuck."

"Maybe we can use that against the girls."

"Diarrhea absolutely not Sirius that…"

"No you berk, potions."

James gave him a blank look and as Sirius explained his genius, his friend burst into laughter, finally catching on.

"They won't know what hit them."

...

"They won't know what hit them!" Dorcas laughed, bouncing a ball idly off the wall as Lily finished the last line of her essay on the International Warlock Convention of 1289.

"Yes, but we have to let them strike first," Lily explained to her friends who had been dying to unleash their meticulous plans on the boys since she had first told them about Sirius' warning.

"Why not!" Marlene whined, flopped down on her bed reading an issue of Witches Weekly.

"Because we're the mature ones. When they attack first it will be in self-defense," Lily reminded them patiently, Dorcas snorting in amusement.

"If the boys think we're mature they have another thing coming."

Lily found herself smiling more than a little looking forward to this. It was so obvious Sirius and James thought they were going to win, in fact, they probably thought she and her friends would sissy out in a few days. But between the four of them, they were confident the ones who would be begging for mercy would be the boys.

Afterall they were far superior to annoying stupid boys.

"We're gonna make them cry for their mommies though I'm pretty sure James already does that, he's such a momma's boy," Dorcas teased and Lily smiled fondly since James was a momma's boy and it really was quite sweet.

"Remember to be nice to Remus."

"Yeah, yeah we'll be nice to your booooyfriend Lily," Marlene chortled and Lily felt her cheeks grow warm.

"He is NOT my boyfriend!" she retorted defensively which just caused her infuriating friends to laugh at her.

"Whatever you say…," Dorcas said appeasingly but she was grinning wickedly.

"Look he's just….he's neutral," Lily pointed out impatiently.

She'd been through this several times. It's not like she could tell her friends that Remus had already been through enough turmoil and didn't at all deserve the discomfort, to straight-up humiliation, they'd be dosing out to the other boys.

"If you think he's going to stay neutral you have another thing coming."

Lily sighed heavily figuring they were right. She couldn't understand why Remus was so loyal to his roommates, they probably wouldn't even accept him, though she hoped desperately for his case they would.

Still, things had been pleasant and Remus had relaxed around her after about a week of awkwardness. He had explained to her the clever way he had gotten his roommates to pay for drugging him and Lily was impressed both by Remus, and that Sirius and James were actually managing to control themselves during class.

She went red remembering Sirius' birthday, Remus had most definitely been laughing that day even though he swore otherwise.

She huffed to herself in irritation rolling up her scroll. Yes, she figured Remus would side with the boys which was a pity since he could have made a convenient spy. Well, Severus was sure convinced he was a spy and was just faking being nice, she let out an even heavier sigh getting a questioning look from Marlene.

If Lily understood Remus at all she understood Severus even less.

Most of the time things were fine, he and Remus had even reached a sort of friendly almost friendship with her prompting. But other days Severus seemed to wake up with storm clouds in his dark eyes and everything she said was dumb. She had made the mistake of telling him about the prank war which must be starting soon since Sirius and James were predictable at times, and she knew they'd be starting the prank war any day now since they couldn't pull pranks in class.

Severus, whose mood she had foolishly failed to pick up on ahead of time, had told her sharply she was being dumb and childish. He had yelled at her telling her there was a war happening and while people died defending their belief she was trading petty pranks with Potter and Black, he had sounded so outraged it was almost funny.

It would have been funny if he hadn't been so very cross over it, each day he seemed to grow more withdrawn and serious. She had figured out one of her dear friends' secrets and that had turned out alright but now she had to contend with her other dear friend's secrets. And unlike Remus, Severus had no qualms about being mean to hide them.

Because something was going on with him and she was sure it had something to with the Slytherins he hung out with, especially Malfoy who seemed to be his best friend now. It was all very odd. She had wanted to confront him on which side he was on in the war, but she was too nervous about what his answer would be.

Then again, if he really was on Voldemort's side he certainly wouldn't be friends with her of all people, a Muggle-born, so that thought comforted her and kept her ceaselessly trying to get through to him.

"Lily, she's zoning out again. Happens everytime we mention Remus yet she insists they aren't dating. LILY!"

She jolted looking at Marlene who looked at her with amusement.

"Yes?"

"You're strangling your scroll to death. You best put it in your pack before you blur all your hard work."

"Oh, thanks, Marlene."

"What were you thinking about anyway?" Dorcas asked with her usual detached interest as if she didn't care if Lily answered at all. Lily quite appreciated this about her chill friend although she was beginning to wonder if Dorcas was more nosy than she led people to believe.

"Oh, just how the first prank will make it clear to the boys that we aren't messing around!"