Chapter Thirty-Two: Harry

Harry awoke to an empty bed.

Has he left?

Was he taken?

Harry leapt out of bed in a panic, checking the empty bathroom before rushing out to the main part of the apartment.

'Draco?!' he couldn't stop the fear from filling his voice.

No, I won't lose him again. I wanted to do better, I wanted to protect him this time!

Finally, Harry found Draco in the sitting area. Draco had just lifted his hands to grip his hair violently. Harry seriously thought Draco was going to pull his hair clean away from his scalp.

'Draco?' Harry asked. But Draco didn't look up – Harry wasn't sure if Draco even heard him. Tears slid down Draco's cheeks, thick and fast. Harry made his way carefully towards Draco, not wanting to surprise him. But Draco's expression had Harry's heart twisting painfully.

Slowly. Don't scare him, it won't help anyone.

Harry jumped when Draco fell to his knees, curling in on himself with a raw, anguished cry.

'Draco?!' Harry couldn't stop the surprised call. But still, Draco didn't seem to hear him. Harry stood in front of Draco and took a deep breath.

'Draco Malfoy.' Harry used the voice he reserved for when he was in his Dom headspace. He was pleased to see Draco freeze and his shoulders relax. But he still didn't look at Harry.

'Draco.' Harry said, more tenderness in his voice now, as he knelt in Draco's line of sight. He breathed in sharply when he noticed Draco's fingernails were digging into his forearm, drawing blood. 'Stop that.' He ordered, doing his best to find that fine line where he gave an unquestionable order but wasn't too harsh.

Draco did as Harry said, relaxing his arms and resting them on his thighs. Draco kept his eyes lowered though, and Harry was dying to see them.

Come on Draco, you can pull yourself out of this. You're safe here, with me.

'Draco.' Harry tried, but Draco had withdrawn into himself again, not hearing Harry. 'Draco, what's wrong?'

Draco heard Harry that time – he frowned in confusion, clearly thinking it over.

He's overthinking it.

But Harry waited for Draco to speak, allowing time for Draco's thoughts to catch up.

'I'm fine.' Draco eventually whispered. Harry exhaled deeply through his nose and shook his head.

'Draco, you clearly aren't fine.' Harry spoke softly and reached one hand out to cup Draco's face.

Draco flinched.

Harry's heart shattered.

Oh, Draco.

In the silence that followed, with neither of them moving, Harry noticed Draco's hands were twitching towards his forearm again.

Fuck. I hate this.

'Draco.' Harry said. Draco finally looked up, but he still didn't look directly at Harry.

Harry's heart broke a little more.

'What do you need from me, Draco?' Harry spoke firmly, trying to hide his own emotions.

'Make me hurt. Make it stop.' Draco pleaded, his watery eyes finally meeting Harry's. They were so full of pain, Harry wanted nothing more than to wrap Draco in a thick blanket and lock him away where only Harry could get to him.

I just want you safe, Draco.

Harry had to fight to keep his expression neutral. This wasn't about him right now - this was about what Draco needed.

It didn't matter that Harry didn't fully understand why Draco needed this, in particular.

As long as it works, and it helps bring Draco back to being himself.

But Harry couldn't stop himself from kissing Draco's forehead tenderly. He knew Draco didn't need that right now, but he knew some part of Draco would understand why Harry needed to be gentle first.

'I'm sorry that this happened to you, Draco.' Harry whispered, afraid if his voice rose any louder, Draco would notice how much this hurt Harry.

This isn't for you. You need to be strong for Draco.

Harry stood, gazing down at Draco. 'You are not to stand, until I say otherwise. Do you understand?'

Draco nodded eagerly.

Fucking Zabini did this to him. I will destroy that bastard.

Harry forced himself to focus on his task at hand.

'As a general rule, you need to answer when I ask you a question. Do you understand me?'

'Yes, Sir!' Draco gasped.

'Good. So, do you understand you are to stay on your knees?'

'Yes, Sir.'

'Good boy. Now, follow me. Do keep up.' Harry said, turning and making his way back to the bedroom. Harry could hear the slight pattering of Draco following on hands and knees.

Once they were both in the bedroom Harry instructed Draco to lie face down on the bed. Draco was still only wearing the boxers he wore to bed the night before.

Perfect body…

Harry shook his head to keep himself focused, and rummaged under the bed. There he found some rope, a paddle and spider gag.

I'm not sure how far Draco wants me to take this.

I'm not sure how much he needs from me.

Harry made sure to place the spider gag on the bedside table loudly. Draco's eyes jerked towards the sound, biting his lip when he saw the toy.

'Yes or no?' Harry asked.

'Yes. Please.' Draco groaned. Harry nodded once, trying to ignore his growing erection at Draco's words.

'But first.' Harry held up the paddle and rope in Draco's line of sight. Draco visibly began to pant and nod his head enthusiastically.

'Please.' He begged.

Quickly and efficiently Harry tied Draco's wrists to the bed. He grabbed the pillows from the top of the bed and placed them under Draco's hips, forcing his arse into the air.

Perfect arse.

Harry allowed himself a few moments to rub his hand over Draco's arse. When Draco began to squirm and grumble, Harry lifted his hand and spanked him firmly, once.

Draco mewled (Harry didn't have another word to describe the noise that came out of Draco's perfect throat) and stilled.

'Good boy,' Harry praised, his hand lifting to spank the other arse cheek. Draco seemed to be pushing his hips up even higher.

Fucking perfect boy.

Deftly, Harry used his wand to tie Draco's ankles to the bed, sending out a quick prayer of thanks that he had magic.

So much faster and neater than having to do it the muggle way.

With extreme care and patience, Harry ran the paddle the length of Draco's body. He held it, flat side down, against Draco's arse cheeks, and watched as Draco tried, and failed, not to squirm in anticipation.

'Please.' Draco moaned desperately.

'Twenty should do it, don't you think?' Harry asked, almost carelessly. Draco gave an impatient groan, that was almost a growl, in response.

Harry felt the rest of the world fall away with every solid landing of the paddle on Draco's perfect behind and thighs. Nothing mattered except for him and Draco.

He allowed himself to take his time, keeping a close eye on Draco's body language and responses. He experimented with speed, watching to see what Draco reacted to most.

'Twenty.' He announced. Draco seemed to sag in disappointment, especially when Harry untied the ropes that had been holding Draco down.

'Stand when you can.' Harry said, placing the paddle on the bedside table and picking up the spider gag. When he turned, he found Draco already standing and waiting expectantly. He tried not to show his surprise, and then forced himself not to stare at Draco's perfect hard on.

'Are your arms and legs feeling OK?' Harry asked, running his hands over Draco's shoulders. Draco shivered delicately and briefly closed his eyes.

'They feel fine, Sir.' Draco said, his voice low and husky.

'I'm glad.' Harry said and held up the spider gag questioningly. Draco immediately dropped to his knees; his mouth open expectantly.

'Please.' Draco begged. Before Harry put the gag on Draco's perfect face, he leant forward and whispered into Draco's ear.

'Remember, if I find out you lied to me about how your body is, I will not be happy.' He pulled back and met Draco's gaze. Draco's eyes were slightly glazed over, but he nodded twice.

'Yes, Sir. I promise I'm not lying.' Draco murmured. Harry gave Draco and crooked grin – not unlike the self-satisfied smirks he used to give Draco in their seventh year – and put on the gag.