It's been a while, I know. I'm sorry for the 4-year hiatus, I graduated high school and college within that time, and have continued my education even further.

I just want to mention that I started this in 2013, 7 years ago, I was the age of 13/14. What I wrote was not the best. I had plenty of typos and used words that I wish I didn't. Also some of the sentence structures… just isn't it. When I last wrote it was 2016. I really wanted to put more time and effort into my writing, but I've had some things happen that pushed that back.

While I cannot promise a set schedule for updates, I can make a promise I will continue to have typos and strangely worded sentences. I still enjoy writing and want to continue this in any spare time I have.

Thank you for anyone who started this with me and for anyone that is reading it now.

[Alex's POV]

Fireworks exploded in my mind, as the sensation filled my body whole with warmth and excitement I have never felt before

I cannot believe I did it.

I actually kissed Kaoru.

As I opened my eyes, I was met with a look of bewilderment and indisposition. Kaoru was quick to his feet, as his pupils raced around my face as if asking me 'why'.

I reached my hand out toward him.

"Kaoru, I-" I was all I could get out before he bolted out the door, the sound of it slamming shut after him was enough to tell me he wouldn't hear anything else. "I can explain," I whispered.

I laid in the bed, silent as I let it all register in my mind. For something that was supposed to bring me comfort, I only feel pain.

"It hurts. My body, my heart, it all hurts." I whimpered to myself as I pulled my injured arm back to my side. The waves of rejection rushing violently through my veins.

You should've told him before that you were a girl, maybe then you would've had a chance.

But you lied to him about who you are.

You just shouldn't have kissed him at all.

He never felt anything towards you.

You are an idiot to think anyone would like you.

He probably thinks you're disgusting.

He hates you.

He never wants to see you again.

You can never go back to normal.

You cannot be 'friends' ever again.

You messed it up.

You messed it up.

You messed it up.

My thoughts just kept replaying like a broken record, digging deeper into the already gaping wound in my heart. I could feel my eyes fill with tears, the physical pain did not matter as much as the emotional one.

As if the world was mocking me, a loud rain started pouring from the skies, hiding any light from the moon that shone through moments before.

"Daddy, I'm hurting. Help me, daddy." I wept for my father, the only person I could have ever looked up to, "What do I do daddy? It hurts too much. I don't know what to do. Tell me, what do I do?" I pleaded to the emptiness of the room as tears rolled down my face.

Suddenly the lights in the room went dark and a large strike of lightning cut across my view out of the window, followed by a few more. Then, the loud rumbling of thunder took over the room, concealing the sounds of my cries.

A small light started inching from under the door, and eventually, the door opened, revealing Kyoya with a candlestick. He walked in slowly and closed the door behind him. He walked over to place the candle down on the desk and then turned to take a seat in the chair across the room, leaning back and closing his eyes when he got comfortable.

"You can go to your room," I said weakly. Kyoya quickly sat up to the sound of my voice.

"I thought you were still asleep." He got up and started walking over. "Are you in pain? Do I need to call the doctor again?" He said in alarm the moment he made eye contact with me and watched a tear roll down my cheek.

"…No… I'm fine." I said before I started crying harder.

"What is hurting you? Is it your arms? Your legs? Tell me where!" Kyoya grabbed for his phone and started to dial a number.

"It's my heart," I spoke meekly.

"You're heart?" Kyoya paused. "What do you mean your heart? Like how does it hurt?" He probed as he grabbed at my new pill bottles.

"He… He rejected me." I cried out. Kyoya closed his phone and put my bottles down before sitting beside me. He silently removed my wig and begin to pet my hair and used his other hand to hold mine.

That was the last thing I remember before falling asleep.

Thank you again for waiting and reaching this chapter. I know it was shorter but I think I might have to start writing shorter chapters so I can keep putting stuff out. I don't know yet if I will continue with short chapters but this one felt right to end it here.

I truly love this story and want to see it to completion.

Until next time,

~Colorfulshadowz~