AN: Hello, everyone! I'm baaaack!

For those of you that aren't on my Facebook page, I have been in a little bit of a funk lately. Work is really tough at the moment and it feels as though we are all feeling the effects of what months of Distant Learning has had on our students and on our own psyche. This year has been rough and my creativity has been shot. One more week left before I start my Summer Holiday and hopefully have more time and energy to write!

This chapter was written pretty quickly and I wanted to get it out ASAP, so my pre-readers Noles and Melissa haven't even read it! Sorry, girls! CoppertopJ helped me out with the major spelling/language errors, but now you know if it doesn't flow as perfectly as usual.

My Reluctant Heart

As soon as the question has left my lips, I can physically feel nerves rising up within him. It's clear that he's embarrassed about something, but isn't able to find the words to describe it. Edward takes a deep breath as his vibrant eyes trace the lines of my face slowly as though he's trying to buy himself some time. I don't push him, but his injuries look painful and I desperately need him to be more open with me, so I wait. Luckily it doesn't take too long.

"I got in a fight with Jake," he reveals vaguely in a rough voice that sends a thrill down my spine.

For some reason, the thought of my mate fighting his Beta makes my wolf wag her tail with excitement and an unexplainable pleasure bubbles up inside of me. I've always been one to not condone violence, yet here I am. In less than 24 hours I've threatened the life of another person and I'm thrilled about the fact that my mate is battered and beaten after participating in what appears to be somewhat of a brawl. Who am I?

I don't have time to think much of it, because I'm quickly distracted by the fact that Edward hasn't told me everything. Holding his gaze, I try to convey that I want him to be honest with me, but it doesn't take long for him to avert his gaze. I can feel disappointment rise inside of me, however, I'm quickly able to prevent it from rising when I realize that Edward just needs a little bit of time.

Giving him a moment, I take my time by studying his handsome profile and do my best to search out every cut and bruise I can find on his light skin. The wounds are in different stages of healing and I realize that the fight must have taken place several hours ago. His injured lip looks to be the worst, but there appears to be a nasty looking cut hidden under a bandaid on his eyebrow. At least someone was able to patch him up and give him some medical attention. A surge of jealousy builds as I realize that I wish I had been the one to help him after his fight, but I do my best to push it away. Wanting to give him some comfort and soothe him, I decide to lift my hand to the back of his neck and begin playing with the soft hairs that I find there. Pleasure bubbles up inside of him and I feel him relax against my touch. He tightens his hold on me and sighs before turning his expressive eyes back in my direction. The determination I find there makes me incredibly happy. He's ready to talk.

"When you told me what had happened to you. I got so angry, Bella. I couldn't even see straight, let alone respond to your questions about Jessica," he begins, his green eyes filled with regret as they burn into mine with an intensity that makes my heart skip a beat in my chest. Although it is painful to think back on my own emotional state when he didn't answer my question, I do realize that he has a point. Perhaps I'd expected too much from him.

"I want to kill him, Bella. Everything in me is urging me to get my ass down to Arizona and seek him out, just to rip his body apart limb by limb," his voice is hard and I can feel his entire body vibrate beneath me as his eyes briefly change color to the now familiar electric green.

Lifting my other hand to his cheek, I gently begin to stroke my fingers across his high cheekbones and rugged chin. He calms down slightly, but I can still feel a lot of anger inside of him. Soon, I understand why.

"Since there was no way for me to take my anger out on the motherfucker who hurt you, I went after the person that should have protected you."

Edward's tone is unforgiving, the expression on his face reveals his lust for revenge. Deep inside of him I can feel how his wolf is pacing back and forth, agitated and ready to jump to the surface at a moment's notice. I consider his words for a moment and then suddenly a chill of fear runs through me because it dawns on me who Edward must have gone after.

"My father," I whisper, fear clear in my voice.

It isn't a question, but a statement. Edward holds my gaze. His expression is hard; revealing nothing, but I already know that I've guessed correctly. I can feel it. He doesn't regret his actions, however he remembers how I reacted when my father was injured in his fight with Carlisle. My throat goes tight with worry, but I try to stay calm. A flash of regret and shame crosses Edward's face and a warm, comforting hand suddenly cups my cheek and holds me steady as he leans forward.

"He's okay," he assures me and I breathe out a sigh of relief, but Edward quickly continues.

"I did attack him," he admits unapologetically while holding my gaze.

Apparently he isn't ashamed by the fact that he attacked my father. In fact, it looks as though he wants nothing more than to teach my father a lesson. I swallow heavily.

"Jake managed to pull me off of Charlie before things got too heated and Leah was able to redirect some of my anger before knocking some sense into my thick skull," he reveals with a sad smile.

I release a deep sigh of relief at the knowledge that my father was OK. Edward and I maintain eye contact for several seconds. Our eyes hold something of an unspoken conversation as our bodies sink into one another. Soon Edward leans forward and gently touches his forehead to mine.

"I wish I could have protected you," Edward whispers almost brokenly as his warm breath tickles my skin.

I'm surprised when I'm actually able to feel the true extent of his pain. It's so much worse than the cuts and bruises on his skin and my heart breaks for him. Closing my eyes I hone on those emotions and force myself to acknowledge just how deep and strong his emotions already are for me. Edward is wearing his heart on his sleeve, showing how much he loves me without actually saying the words. It's terrifying and wonderful all at the same time and I don't know how to deal with it. I've become so used to being alone that when someone actually comes around and wants to be with me… to love me… I do what I can to push them away. Deep shame flares up inside of me and I can feel tears burn in my eyes. If the imprint hadn't happened I'd probably have kicked him to the curb and never allowed him to get this close to me, but right now it's like I don't have a choice. We are bound together and because of that I'm forced to acknowledge and deal with some very painful facts about myself and issues that I've only ever ran away from.

"Oh, baby, I'm sorry," Edward tells me softly, clearly reacting to my emotions, as he pulls me into a tight hug, turning me so that I'm straddling him.

The warmth of his body feels so good against mine and I quickly tuck my head into his neck breathing in his rich scent. Our bond sings with delight over our increased physical contact and I can actually feel how it is also reacting to the fact that we are slowly growing closer emotionally as well. Feeling the soothing comfort of my mate makes me think about how dependent on him I've already become. Yes, I am terrified of acknowledging my emotions and opening myself up to love, but I'm even more terrified of losing him. A desperate need to bind him to me surges up inside of me, like an itch I'm unable to reach.

"I got you, Bella, and I won't ever let you go," he continues, rubbing his hands up and down my back in comfort.

I can feel the vibrations of his voice against my chest, without even realizing it I've moved so that my lips are hovering right above my mark on his neck. Joining my sudden urge to bind my mate to me, is a wave of possessiveness so strong that it completely takes over my every single thought and movement. I won't lose him. He's mine. Sticking out my tongue, I carefully lick the rugged edges of my mark. Edward's voice hitches and a loud moan echoes through the room just as his hips react on instinct by flexing against mine. I can feel how my actions have taken him by surprise, but he is allowing the sudden change of events to play its course.

A strange impatience expands in my gut and I quickly continue my efforts and begin leaving wet kisses around his mark. I can feel his sharp intakes of breath, the increasing thuds of his heart beats and the way his blood begins to sing to me beneath his skin. I feel as though I'm on something. His taste makes me feel as though I'm on the top of the world, nearing a high that no drug on earth can even come close to. Gently, I suck Edward's skin into my mouth and he immediately reacts by digging his hands into my ass, pushing me against his increasingly hardening erection. I can't help but moan in return and quickly renew my efforts.

"Jesus, Bella. We need to talk."

The open desire in his voice and the not so subtle thrusts of his hips against mine, completely contradicts his words. I suck harder. The pleasure I feel building inside of both of us is quickly taking over every single thought and action. Nothing else matters. The feel of him against me as I bind him even tighter to me.

I can't lose him. I need him. I lo-.

My wolf rises to the surface as I feel the tingle of my fangs extending. The sensation reminds me very much of what it feels like just before a sneeze. I hesitate for a second as I hover above the area where I'm about to dip my teeth into his soft skin and then the world abruptly shifts. Before I know what is going on, my back is pushed against the soft cushions and Edward towers above me, holding me down with a strong grip around my wrists. The excitement I feel when his electric eyes meet mine and I see how his fangs have also extended, causes my entire body to tremble. His firm, ironclad grip around my wrists makes it impossible for me to move, but the intent only increases my lust for him. My wolf loves this dominating side of him and she quickly bares our neck to him.

Edward's eyes respond immediately and are drawn to his mark that is now clearly on display. I can't help but whimper in anticipation, my body feels feverish and tense and I know that the only thing that will ease my discomfort is the taste of his blood. I hold my breath when he finally leans forward. Sure that we are seconds away from getting what we both want, I run my tongue over my dry lips, impatiently waiting for him to move even closer. Tilting my head back, I bare my neck even more, showing him that I want this; I want him to bite me so that we can renew our bond. I need him to do this. In the corner of my eye, I can see his nose flares when he pauses just a few inches away.

"Please, Edward," I beg, my voice shaking with need.

"We need to talk, Bella," he bites out, but I can hear the hesitation in his voice and I can see how desperately he wants this as well.

"We will, but right now-," my voice breaks. "Please."

Luckily, my pleas are heard, because in the next second, his head drops and his teeth slash through my skin like butter. The sudden pain is quickly replaced by pleasure so powerful I almost forget to do the same. Luckily, a surge of possessiveness flows through me and I quickly latch onto his neck. The euphoria I feel as his blood hits my tongue is like a glimpse of heaven. This is the first time we've blood bonded without having sex, but I'm surprised by the fact that the pleasure that follows is just as powerful. I can feel Edward's heartbeats mirror my own, his emotions join mine and how I can almost feel his presence in my mind. It's almost as though we are one.

I have no idea how long we hold onto the connection, but when we finally release our hold it is done at the exact same time. Edward's body falls heavily against mine and I can feel how spent and relaxed he feels. I'm dealing with the exact same reaction, so I can't do anything other than simply lay back and enjoy the delicious weight of him covering my body. Luckily, he regains some of his awareness before I'm completely crushed beneath him. He moves to the side, lazily moving us so that he is reclined on the couch and I'm safely tucked into his side with half of my body draped across his. Relaxing my cheek against his broad chest, I close my eyes and take a moment to bask in this incredible sensation of utter peace.

After a short while, Edward tucks a finger under my chin and lifts my head up so that he can kiss me. The gentle touch of his lips against mine feels so good and we both linger for an extra moment, simply basking in this extremely intimate moment where nothing else matters but us. When I pull back, my eyelids feel heavy as though I've just had a long nap. Forcing them open, I trail them lovingly across the beautiful face of my mate and my breath immediately catches.

"Your injuries are gone!" I exclaim in surprise.

Edward's eyebrow furrows and he quickly lifts a hand to inspect the area where he had that nasty cut on his bottom lip. Shock and surprise spreads across his face as he realizes the truth behind my words. He's completely healed! I can feel his confusion mix with my own. Unable to stop myself, I begin touching his face as well. Soon, my fingers aren't enough and I lean forward and gently leave a trail of soft kisses in those areas where I remember seeing ugly bruises and nasty cuts. I send a prayer of thanks to whoever it is that is listening.

If my blood was able to heal Edward, I am grateful. So incredibly grateful. I don't even care to consider why or how it was even possible. I soon feel passion and desire rise within him as my kisses increase with intensity and it doesn't take long for his lips to find mine again. However, this time hot desire explodes between us as our tongues join together in a sensual, synchronized dance. When we finally break apart, we are both breathing heavily and our cheeks are flushed, our bodies trembling with need. However, we both know that we need to talk and we are determined to do so before we allow our lust to take over.

"I'm going to go by the hospital later and talk to Jessica," Edward begins in a husky voice and I feel as though I've been drenched by an enormous bucket of cold ice-water.

My stomach immediately sinks with disappointment and I feel my insecurities rise. Edward must be able to feel the change in me, because he quickly tightens his hold around me and forces my eyes to his.

"You asked me why she tried to come between us, even after our imprint," he pauses, his eyes burning into mine as he makes sure that I'm not trying to pull away from him.

"I told you that Jessica means nothing to me, and I meant that. You are the only woman I want and you are the first and last woman I will ever have any kind of relationship with. You are my mate, Bella, my soul's other half. My future."

My heart skips a beat at the intensity of his gaze as he speaks and I can feel my wolf nudge me to keep my head held high and not to shrink away from this conversation. It's almost as though she's telling me to not be a pussy and listen to what Edward has to say. He's finally answering my question and I need to be strong enough to deal with his response.

"However, after talking with Leah, I realize that I wasn't as clear with Jessica as I should have been. I need to clarify a few things with her and make sure that she understands that she and I are over and that there can never be anything between us ever again."

We both appear to be holding our breath.

"I'm sorry I didn't do it sooner, but I truly didn't realize that she might still have expectations. Make no mistake, I belong to you, baby and I simply want to make sure that Jessica realizes that," his emerald eyes pierce into mine with an intensity that makes my heart pound.

I don't like the idea of him going to talk to another woman without me and my wolf absolutely hates the idea, but rationally, I can understand his reasoning. I'm distracted when a wolfish smile spreads across Edward's pink lips.

"Now, I don't think any member of the Pack has any doubts about that fact after you almost threw Jessica off a cliff," he chuckles and I can't help but smile, "but she needs to hear it from me. Hopefully, that will stop her efforts."

I consider his words for a moment and soon exhale a deep breath of relief. I realize that although I don't want him near Jessica, him being willing to do this is exactly what I've needed from him. By setting the record straight with Jessica he is giving me the confirmation I need of his dedication and devotion to me as his mate. By including me in his thought process and plans, I don't feel as though I'm left in the dark any more. I would prefer to be there when he talks to Jessica, but I realize that this is something he needs to do on his own.

Nodding my head in agreement, I'm quickly pulled back into yet another passionate embrace and I throw myself into it freely, feeling as though a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders and a wall between us has crumbled. I feel even closer to him somehow. In absolutely no time at all, Edward has pulled me up top as he reclines, surrendering to my every touch. He had been in control when we renewed our blood bond, but now he clearly wants me to hold the reins. Although I'm the one calling the shots, his hands are everywhere as we both move against one another, our bodies desperately trying to get as close to one another as physically possible.

I've relieved him of his shirt and am working on the buttons of his jeans when Edward suddenly sits up, expertly pushing my bra down as he hitches my t-shirt up to my neck and begins to devour my breasts. A wanton moan falls from my lips just as the front door slams open. Both Edward and I freeze.

"Jesus Christ! MY EYES!" a shrill female voice shouts as though she's in acute physical pain.

Edward groans in displeasure and throws the back of his head against the couch in defeat as I quickly try to pull my bra and t-shirt into place before turning to our intruder.

"Leah, if you hadn't already noticed, we are busy," Edward harshly throws in my cousin's direction and I quickly send him a scolding look.

Leah immediately turns, her eyes blazing as she takes an almost threatening step towards Edward. Glancing down she shudders in open disgust before looking my way.

"Bella, could you… dismount, please? It's distracting," she asks surprisingly polite, before throwing herself down into one of the adjacent chairs as she sends Edward a look. She isn't going anywhere.

I do as I've been told and usher Edward to sit up and make room. Edward grumbles for a moment, but soon complies to my wishes. He quickly wraps an arm around my shoulders and pulls me to him, doing nothing to hide the evidence of his arousal. I quickly pass him his t-shirt as Leah pretends to vomit. When Edward reluctantly pulls his shirt back on I have to bite back a grin. I love the almost brother-sister relationship that Leah and Edward have.

"I'm glad to see that you've made up and whatever, but Bella and I apparently have to go dress shopping for the Mating Ceremony in Port Angeles today," she groans as though this might be her absolute worst nightmare.

"I know. Alice said she'd be by in a few hours," I reply and Leah openly cringes.

Edward's fingers are distracting as they lightly draw shapes on my upper arm.

"Well, apparently shopping for the perfect dress takes precedence over every one of our plans. Esme had to push the appointment up. We need to leave as soon as possible," Leah conveys and I can't help but feel a little disappointed.

I don't want to leave Edward, especially not now when I feel as though we've made somewhat of a breakthrough. Our connection is begging for us to stay together and I can already feel how much I'll miss him when I leave.

"I need to get back to my apartment in PA anyways for school tomorrow, so I told Alice you'd ride with me. She went to pick up some of the other girls," Leah continues, but I'm unable to really pay much attention to what she's saying.

Edward tightens his hold on me and pulls me even closer. I can feel that he doesn't like the idea of me leaving either. I try to come up with some kind of argument for not leaving just yet, but without my truck I know I don't have a choice. I need to buy a new car ASAP so that I won't always be dependent on other people driving me where I need to go.

"How about I meet up with you in Port Angeles later and we go out?" Edward asks softly, clearly trying to make this easier for us both.

"Like a date?" I raise one eyebrow as I glance in his direction. Immediately his lips lift into a heart stopping half smile and a wave of happiness flows through me.

"Yeah," he replies softly and gently brushes his nose against mine playfully.

I hold his tender gaze for a second before nodding my head in agreement. I'd love to go out with him. Our first date. I feel a giggle build as I think about how backward we're doing this. We are basically living together and we haven't even been on a first date yet! Before I can comment on it, Edward suddenly covers my lips with his and a thrill of excitement shoots through me. As soon as his lips touch mine, it's as though we are both thrust back into that bubble of desire and it doesn't take long before Edward deepens the kiss. We are both forced apart, however, when we are hit by a soft pillow. Glancing in her direction I see Leah is ready for yet another attack, holding two more pillows in her hands. I roll my eyes and can feel Edward's aggravation build inside of him.

"Bye Edward!" Leah says with a mischievous smile.

Edward and I slowly get to our feet and a look of absolute victory crosses Leah's face.

"Remind me to drop in on you at the most inopportune moments after you've just mated," Edward throws in Leah's direction as he buttons his jeans, but she simply waves him off.

Cupping my face between his strong hands he tenderly brushes his thumbs over my cheeks before leaving an achingly soft kiss on my lips.

"I will see you later," he whispers and I can feel anticipation rise at his promise.

Edward Cullen is taking me out for a date and that makes me react like a giddy school girl, but I can't find it in me to care. I am so excited about this and I can see that he is too. After a final nuzzle of his nose against mine, Edward reluctantly stands up and begins to walk away. My eyes follow him as he saunters his way towards the exit the cottage, pausing there he turns and send me a wink filled with so much promise that I feel my heart skip a beat. His confidence makes me weak in the knees and I have to force myself not to sigh like some love-drunk teenager as my eyes follow him for as long as I can. Just as the door closes behind him, Leah gets to her feet and laughs at me teasingly.

"Let's get your head out of those pink clouds, Cuz. We have to get going."