A/n Wow I haven't updated this since like November sorry about that :( — but here's a new chapter hope you like it :)
And I can't find the article I read a while ago on children born out of wedlock but the reason why Amara's is a big deal to her is I believe that the article said children born out of wedlock were frowned upon more in the 1960s. Please correct me if I'm wrong though, sadly I cannot find the article.
I had never known my father. My mother raised me on her own. My grandparents supplied a suitable sum of money, enough to cover babysitting fees and supplies while my mother worked. Other than that my grandparents didn't want anything to do with me; perhaps it was because the situation circulating my father, it was a touchy subject that my mom almost never talked about.
The one time she did mention it was after a long day waitressing at a local diner. I caught her crying over a wrinkled photo of her wearing a simple shift dress with a small bow dangling from the center of its front neckline. Her arms were thrown over the back of a dark-haired lanky man who leaned up against a bar counter for stabilization. I had asked and gotten confirmation that it was my father yet seconds later my mother had folded the photo up and stuffed it into a pocket.
I'd asked if he was like us; magic. My mother reluctantly answered he wasn't.
The next day I had told Severus what I found out and he took it in stride; there wasn't any bigotry or judgement in his eyes. Even though I hadn't really talked to Severus in a while, I hoped that there was a sensible reason behind all this. That when I found him his eyes would hold that same look and our bond would be unbroken.
First I checked the Common Room, shouting his name at the bottom of the stairwell leading up to the boys dormitories. The only response I got was an irritated fifth-year who told me to 'piss off' for waking him up. Severus wasn't in the Grand Hall, the courtyard, nor any of the classrooms I checked. The thought that he might have wandered out of the castle in search of a spot to watch the fireworks came to mind, and I cautiously slipped through a door and into the night.
A meow startled me causing my heart to jump into my throat. I froze on the viaduct, my eyes snapping down to a small figure hardly discernible in the dark. I squinted. "Louis?" Another meow. The tension in me disappeared and I fell to my knees to scoop up the cat. "Are you following me?" I shook my head disapprovingly, continuing my search. "I know I'm out past curfew, but if I get caught you shouldn't have to get in trouble too." Louis bumped his head into my chin, the rumble from his purr alleviating some of the negative feelings weighing down my chest.
"Yes I know. We're in this together."
The pathway I was walking on ended at a stairway leading to the grounds. With haste, I descended it.
Louis abruptly began to squirm and to avoid getting clawed I dumped him on the ground. At a loss, I watched as he sprinted off into darkness. My lips pressed together, staring at the spot where I'd seen him melting into the shadows.
I drew my wand. "Lumos."
A pale light erupted from the tip of my wand. I could see a few paces in front of me, see the outline of the pathway I trudged on. I didn't dare increase the brightness of the spell in case a professor saw the speck of light floating in the night.
I'd made it around to the docks. The moonlight allowed me to see a figure sitting on the edge, their legs dangling over, feet skimming the water. An animal, a cat, circled leisurely around the stranger.
That had to be him.
My feet began walking, then developed into a jog as a tightness welled up inside my chest. I was afraid of what was going to happen. I didn't want to confront Severus and risk losing our friendship.
The sound of my feet hitting the dock alerted Severus, and he turned sharply in my direction. I slowed to a stop, and we stared at each other. I cleared my throat, breaking the silence. Severus then turned his back to me and for a second I lost my confidence, then I decided it was best to just get it over with.
I said in one breath, "Mulciber called me a bastard and he said you told him which would make no sense since you said you'd never tell anyone."
Severus grunted, but no words.
I hiked my brows, his nonchalant attitude stirring a fire in me. I mimicked the noise he made. "That's it? Mm? Are you daft? Why did you tell Mulciber something private like that? Friends don't do that!"
"Because, Amara," Severus snapped, startling me by turning around abruptly. "Mulciber says if you're not a pureblood you don't belong. And you're not which means," He paused, brows furrowing as if he was debating whether to continue. Seconds later he hardened his stare having settled his inner turmoil. "you don't belong."
I diverted my gaze, shocked. Bitterly I said, "Since when did you start buying into Mulciber's ideology?"
"I don't have to buy into it, I agree with what he says."
My face twitched, bearing an inscrutable expression. My lips pressed tightly together as a humility and a nauseating betrayal choked me. I had been naive to believe that Severus would be the same after sticking to Mulciber's side like glue, absorbing his preachings that anyone unlike them were to be viewed in contempt; Severus eventually took the words in as his own.
"Fine. If that's what you think." The quiet whisper came accompanied with a weak shrug and I turned on my heel stalking back the way I came.
When I reached the door to the winding stairway leading up to the viaduct I had to pause and catch my breath. My head rested against the cool stone the walls were erected from and the only sound was the thrumming of my heart.
Our friendship was over. Lost — to the lack of effort I put in and to the boy-club he had so adamantly been trying to fit in on.
A softness brushed against my legs and through moist eyes I glanced down to see Louis. I cracked a smile, rubbing at my runny nose. "Come on, we better get going before we're caught."