I changed, and went downstairs, to the home gym in the basement and took my frustration out on the equipment there.

It had been a while since I'd trained, and I let myself get lost, going too hard on my body in an attempt to clear my mind.

I came back upstairs hours later, and was surprised to find that it was nearly nightfall.

I took a much needed shower, then pulled on my sleep pants and went into the kitchen to find food.

I found Rey. There was a bowl of pasta and a glass of wine on the countertop in front of her, and she didn't look up or acknowledge me when I walked in.

I reached up and grabbed a glass out of the cabinet, then walked over to the sink and turned on the faucet to fill it with water from the tap.

"That looks good." I said to Rey, then drained my glass and filled it again.

"It is." She replied curtly and took another bite.

I moved closer, and leaned against the counter. "What is it?"

She shrugged. "I don't remember what they called it." She twirled her fork around, then held it up, offering it to me.

I watched her as I leaned forward and let her feed me the sampling of her dinner.

It was a mushroom alfredo with spinach. And, it was absolutely amazing.

I asked the service droid for a serving, and they went to work, filling the kitchen with the sizzle and boil of the preparations, as well as the smell of cooking garlic and herbs.

I took my plate from them when it was done and stood several feet from Rey as we both ate in tense silence.

I wanted to talk with her. I wanted her to tell me that she'd missed me. I wanted to forget about this morning and hold her, kiss her, laugh with her. But, I was afraid that talking would just start another fight, and she was obviously still upset.

Was I willing to be the one to apologize first?

Well, I wasn't willing to continue dinner like this, so I took a breath. "Rey,"

She turned her wine glass up, drained it, and put it and her empty plate into the sink.

"'Night." She said, as she walked by me. She went to her room and shut the door, and my heart sank when I heard the lock click.

Not because I couldn't get in, but because she didn't want me with her.

I finished my dinner, and went to bed alone.

oOo

The Bond tugged at my chest so forcefully I bolted upright, coming fully awake. A cold terror settled into my gut, and I knew that feeling all too well.

"Rey." I breathed, and flung off the covers.

I ran to her door, and found it to be locked when I tried to turn the handle. I grunted in frustration and flicked my fingers, hearing the lock slide back.

The room was dark and cool when I stumbled in, and Rey started awake.

"Ben?" She said, her voice thick with sleep.

I went to her, and took her face in both of my hands. "Are you ok?" I demanded.

She pushed herself up. "I'm fine." So, why had the Bond pulled me to her? Why did I feel, no, I knew, deep in the marrow of my bones I knew that my mate was in danger.

In the dim light, I could see that her forehead was creased with confusion. "What's wrong?" She demanded. "Did you have a nightmare?"

I shook my head. "No." I pulled away, looking her over for any signs of injury, when I heard the front door to the house fly open. I instinctively moved to put myself in front of Rey.

"Ben?" C called urgently.

"What is going on?" Rey asked from behind me, but I went into the hall without answering her.

C ran to me. "You have to go." She panted. "Now."

"Why?" Rey insisted, coming out of her room to stand next to me.

C looked at her. "I was notified that a First Order ship requested permission to land."

The room faded as the Force buzzed around me, and I listened, really listened. I reached out, opening a part of myself that had been closed off for months.

"Who could have found us so quickly?" Rey asked.

"My Knights." I answered, sensing them in the Force. "They tracked my Force signature." It was stronger now that it was Bonded, and had led them to me like a fucking beacon.

"I have a ship ready for you." C cut in. "You have to go!" She turned toward the door.

"No." Rey said, and C and I both turned to look at her. "We don't have to go." She looked up at me. "We have to fight."

"Fight?" C echoed.

The Bond roared at me. Protect her. I had to protect her. I had to get her off of this planet. I had to get her to safety.

"Fight with what?" C demanded. "We don't know how many there are. We dont know what weaponry they have."

Rey looked down and I fought an urge to go to her.

Protect.

"I can't fight with you because that would mean war with the First Order, and millions of innocent people, of my people will die." C explained.

Get her off of this planet.

"Your best bet of survival is to run." My cousin looked at me for back up. "Ben. Tell her."

Get her to safety.

"Tell her that she cant fight." C begged. "Tell her to get on the ship."

I knew that she was right. When hadnt C been right? She'd saved our asses, had taken us in, had protected us. And, these weren't just any men. These were my men. My knights. I'd trained them.

And, I knew exactly how dangerous they were.

"No." I said, though it physically pained me to force the word out.

Rey's head snapped up, her eyes wide.

"No?" C gasped.

I shook my head, keeping my gaze locked on Rey's. "She's not my padawan, I am not her master." I said, my voice strained. "She is not my subject, I do not command her."

My throat ached with the effort it took to speak.

"She doesn't need me to protect her." I said, looking over at C, who was fuming.

Rey didn't need a protector, or a defender. She didn't want someone to make her decisions for her. And, up until now, I'd done a fine job of fucking everything up trying to do exactly that. I had to trust her. I had to, or this, us, we weren't going to work.

"You're going to get you and your mate killed!" C yelled. "And, I can't save you this time."

"I know " I confessed in a shaky voice. I stepped forward toward Rey, hoping she couldn't hear the screaming protests of the Bond, and stood in front of her. "Where do you need me?" I asked, awaiting orders, and watched a smile light her face.

oOo

Author's note: I wrote 5 different versions of this chapter, and they were all vastly different. ultimately, I decided that Ben needed to come to the realization that he has to respect Rey enough to make her own decision, as Chewie, and C have previously told him.