Chapter 21: A Hard Decision

Did you ever have that feeling of foreboding? Like something was about to happen and you didn't know say how you knew, but you did. It had started this morning, just after she had turned up to class and sat down. As she turned to talk to Tsu-chan about her weekend Midoriya caught her eye as he was looking over at her. She grinned a flicked up a hand in a still wave when she noticed his uneasy expression directed toward her. He forced a smile and returned the gesture, but that look had stuck in her mind all day.

"Was he having second thoughts on our going out again?" She kept thinking. She knew it was a leap, but she didn't exactly have a list of reasons why Midoriya had ever looked that way before. He'd never once looked at her like that and it made her feel really uneasy. The expression all but wrote the words doubt, worry and regret on his face. Had she been pushing too hard? Asking too much too early, without considering his feelings. What if he was the shy and quiet Midoriya only because he preferred being on his own most of the time? He was social because he was kind and a good teammate because he had to be for his own dreams. It's not like any of that was farfetched. Especially with how powerful he actually was, he had the ability to make anything happen, there was never any actual reason to assume differently when she thought of it now.

As the day continued, she managed to come up with a second plausible theory after her repeatedly telling herself that she was reading too much into it and she had to stop it. It could be to do with the exam, right? He was so worried that time she asked him to be her partner that he forgot about her he bought her a necklace. So, who knows how he would react to their failing the test?

Except that wasn't it. He had never looked at her like that before and he had felt guilty about letting her down before, twice that she knew of even if they were both mostly in his own head.

Tsu tapped her on her shoulder

"Mina-chan?" she called, concerned "Are you alright?" As Mina turned and forced a smile, she realised the bell had already rung, the class dismissed for lunch break and she had been continuing to stare down at her book.

"Y-yeah, I'm all good. Just one of those mornings" she said dismissively. Asui lay a finger near her mouth as per her usual thinking expression as she tilted her head.

"Kero, one of what mornings?" She repeated in question. Mina chuckled nervously and shrugged.

"Hey Mina-chan!" Toru chirped arriving at her desk "Tsu-chan!" she added cheerily with the arms on her uniform raising in an invisible greeting.

"Ready for some lunch?"

"That sounds like a good idea" Asui nodded in agreement. She was a little taken aback, concerned even, by the energetic Mina's sudden lack of spirit. Despite her being defeated in her own exam, she had managed to pass overall due to her efforts in both her physical exams as well as her surprisingly high score on her written exam. She ought to ask about that too once Mina was seeming to be more herself. In any case, she didn't have a reason to be so upset in relation to the assignment.

Together the girls headed down to the cafeteria with Toru carrying the conversation, naturally it was about the examination she had done on the Saturday, and her seemingly epic fight against Kirishima, whom she was able to outlast and eventually bring down as a result of her training. She had then located Mina and Ochaco duking it out just in time to see Mina throw the knockout punch, before collapsing herself due to what seemed to be sheer exhausting. An epic fight indeed, Asui thought, thankful her own exams hadn't been quite so dramatic.

She listened intently for some key information that might explain Mina's current state, but nothing sounded as though it could be the culprit from anything Toru had mentioned.

"So, how was your date?" Toru bubbled. Asui's whipped around as Mina snapped to attention as though an electric current had just run through her.

"It wasn't a date!" she stammered in panic, waving her hands about.

"Date?" Asui repeated. Now that was unusual, Mina hadn't even mentioned this. Mina, of all people.

"Okay… how was your totally not a date, date?" she teased, latching onto Mina playfully.

"Ugh, it really wasn't…" Mina continued to insist, then looking up shyly at Asui "Me and Midoriya just hit the town is all, you know to blow off some steam and stuff"

She spoke quietly, not at all how Asui had ever envisioned Mina talking about a date she might have gone on. Apparently, it really wasn't a date, but what might be was the answer to the riddle of her dampened spirits. She felt a temptation to tease her friend too, and she might have too, were Mina acting as her usual self. Better to tread carefully instead.

"That's a good idea after the stress of the exams, kero. Did it work?" She inquired carefully wording her question so as to neither imply nor deny whether it was a date or not, right now that hardly mattered by then, this was the first she was hearing of it.

"Yeah, it was actually really awesome" Mina smiled, brightening. "We ate some food then he took me to the Round One Stadium, we had a competition over loads of different games, bowling, table tennis and a bunch of other stuff! The winner, me obvs, got to make a demand too!" her voice becoming more energised with each word. Asui was happy to hear her friend's usual spark reignite but was equal parts puzzled by just what had deflated her so to begin with.

"Did you make him dance with your demand?" Toru giggled

"Didn't have to, they had a dance game in the arcade!" The two girls began laughing at a joke Asui didn't quite understand, though it was probably based on poor Midoriya-chan's lack of grace on the dance floor. She smiled along, contented to see Mina perking back up.

Shortly thereafter they got their food and ate it as Mina regaled her friends with her individual victories and defeats at the stadium. As Asui listened in, smiling, laughing and asking for details where Mina seemed eager to jump ahead to the conclusion, she began to see it in her friend. It may well not have been a date, but the way she spoke about him it seemed clear as day to Asui that Mina might well have wanted it to be. She had fallen for Midoriya. Pretty hard too if she could tell from just this one conversation. She could only hope that the expression earlier had nothing to do with this happiness her friend had found. If it did go south, then from the little experience Asui had with romance, it would cut a deep wound that would not heal easily. But, Midoriya-chan wouldn't do that, would he?

Mina felt herself feel so much better as talked through her own weekend. She was reminded that they did have a fantastic time, she and him both. There was nothing fake about it and so she knew she could trust that. She didn't know what that look at been about, but she had overthought it, rather than get so worked up she had better ask him if everything was alright. If he was troubled, she wanted to help in anyway that she could, she wanted to be there for him, as it felt he had been for her lately. After all, they were friends now and what were friends for if not to help each other in their times of need. Even in silent need.

Her spirits were lifted for the remainder of the day. She was able to focus on her classes again and put her newfound confidence in her academic ability to work, occasionally treating herself to a brief wonder at just what surprise Midoriya might prepare for her. She felt herself grinning like an idiot and her body warming in delight as she imagined various scenarios before pulling herself back down to earth before Aizawa noticed her mentally goofing off. A week felt far too long to have to wait until the next time. She ought to ask him about doing another study session one of the weeknights.

As the class was dismissed for the day, she packed up her bags and turned to locate Toru, they often walked back to the dorms together. She came face to face with Midoriya instead. That look was back. She felt a flicker of fear. She shoved it away, reminding herself that she was being ridiculous.

"H-hey, Izuku" she smiled, some nerves creeping into her voice despite herself "How are you doing?" she managed in a much brighter tone.

"Hey Mina" he replied cautiously, as if guarded "I'm alright, I just wondered if we could talk later?"

"Sure, nothing too serious I hope" Mina responded cheerily, trying to keep it light.

"Um…well" he muttered, averting his eyes "Let's meet outside the dorm at say around four?"

Mina felt a chill in her chest. Was she just being negative again?

"Um, yeah, sure" she agreed. Her positivity fading. He looked at her with that almost fearful expression, nodded then left, not looking back.

The chill turned into a numbness, a stillness. She didn't know what to think now. She had just about convinced herself she had been thinking about it all wrong but now it just seemed so clear that he was going to tell her something she didn't want to hear. Without thinking about it, she turned and begun to walk back to the dorms, alone. Her mind holding onto that look of his. That expression she had never seen before today. She couldn't even say she had seen it on anyone in real life before. Just when the madness had ended! Why was there always something, just when things were going so well too. It felt like the universe had turned on her. Pointed to her and said

"Ah, there you are. A happy, contended person. I've been looking for you"

"No" she pushed the thought. It didn't budge. She couldn't let herself think so negatively all the time! It was ridiculous, he hadn't even said anything else and here she was automatically assuming that it was going to be him cancelling their day together.

Her mind froze as this thought tried to cross it, unnoticed.

She hurried along, wanting nothing more than to collapse on her bed and remind herself that this was all just in her head.

It was hard to believe that just the other day she was so sure he had been about to kiss her. Wait, that's right, how did that fit in with all of this? How do you go from a moment like that to…?

"Wait, wait, wait. Was it possible that this is what he is feeling guilty about?" she asked herself. Maybe she was just clinging to it like a drowning woman to a lifebuoy, but it did fit! Of course she wouldn't have seen that expression on his face before, it wasn't a situation they had ever been in, nor one she could imagine he had found himself in before based on how shy he had always been around her, especially when she initiated physical contact.

For now, she would tell herself that this is what the conversation was going to be about. At least if that were true, all she would have to worry about is an awkward apology or something days before she planned to confess to him anyway.

At last she made it to the sanctuary that was her room. She busied herself by sorting out her books, removing her homework and setting aside on her desk, putting what she didn't need away and bagging what she would need tomorrow that wasn't already on her desk. She got changed out of her uniform and into her casuals. Normally she might go for a run around now, burn off some excess energy, always doubly helpful when it was anxious energy like it was right now, in spades at that. She glanced at the time; it was already just minutes to go. She felt her legs turn to jelly, wanting to give underneath her, planting her on the ground, as if to say, 'stay here, you'll be safe if you just stay here'.

She couldn't do that, however much the idea appealed to her. She would just have woman up. Whatever it was she could deal with it. She looked at herself in the mirror. That's right. She was Ashido Mina. Hero. She had already decided to put her heart on the line for Midoriya. Whatever happened it at least couldn't be any worse than that and, hey, who knows? It might not even be all that bad, Midoriya was pretty weird in how conscientious he was and how he acted on it all the time. She couldn't know what it could be any more than she could have predicted anything else he had surprised her with.

At that thought, her eyes settled on the necklace around her neck in her reflection. Not a day had gone by yet were she hadn't worn it. To her, this was a token of their friendship and how he cared for how she felt. Wearing it had given her a sense of comfort and happiness that someone did care about her. Glancing back up at the clock as it creeped ever closer to the time, she turned and left her room, ready to be done with whatever the day had planned for her.

She already saw him sat out there as she came down the last set of stairs, from which you could see out front. She practised smiling as she walked, determined to keep herself from acting the depressing way her brain had been responding all day. Hope for the best, she instructed herself.

"Hey, Izuku!" she called in her best cheery voice. He had been staring ahead, apparently in a world of his own, then turned to her slowly with a small smile flickering on his lips as she saw her.

"Hey Mina, thanks for agreeing to meet me like this" he got to his feet.

"Of course, we're partners, right?" she chirped, forcing it. He seemed to twitch a little at that comment.

"Ah, y-yeah, well a-about that" he muttered. Her heart clenched in her chest. "That's kind what I wanted to talk to you about" She swallowed and did her best to seem confused, as though she hadn't given it all days' worth of thought.

"Oh? What do you mean?" she asked, successful keeping her voice steady. He looked away and down, his fist clenching by his side.

"Sh-shall we sit?" he asked, gesturing to where he had been sat before, the last bench on the end of the patio at the front of the dorms.

"Sure" she agreed, following him and sitting apart from him so she could be turned toward him without being too close. He sat too and faced her as much as the bench would allow.

"Mina…" he began, then turning his eyes back toward her "I've been doing some th-thinking lately, a-about our…" he trailed off, words seeming to fail him.

Mina could feel her heart sinking in her chest. No matter how you looked at it, this wasn't looking good for her.

"I-I mean to say, about our day out" he corrected himself shakily.

"Which one, the one gone or coming up?" she asked, sounding more in control than she felt. That was a blessing at least.

"Um, the one coming up…" he began, his eyes going every which way, settling on her again each time as though he were having major problems keeping eye contact, his face uncomfortable, panicky looking and flushed.

"Izuku" she called, calmly "I'm not sure what you are trying to say, so why don't you start at the beginning?" she suggested, surprised that she managed to make it through that so smoothly. She just hoped that he got to the point quickly as she was starting to lose her composure.

"R-right" he nodded. For a moment he just sat there thinking, so deep in thought she wondered if she would have to prompt him to speak. "I need to apologise to you, Mina" he suddenly said, sounding certain again as he looked up at her and locked eyes with her, holding it this time.

"Why?" she breathed, her control slipping now, her fingers trembling as she held her hand in the other.

"For the bus… I didn't mean to… I wouldn't do that" he managed without looking away again. Mina wanted to ask why not or tell him she wouldn't have minded but knew her throat was at risky of betraying her if she spoke now, her words could easily become a sob.

"I've been thinking lately about who I want to become and what I am going to have to do to achieve it." now he looked aside, but not out of nerves, like he was recalling his past. "I've been set on a path I have to see through, I have to train all the time, to push myself harder than anyone."

Mina nodded, knowing what was coming. He didn't have time for… distractions.

"And then we partnered up. I had a lot of fun, much more than I have had in… such a long time. It was great and I am so thankful to you for picking me and for the memories we have made together. But it also raised the question in me, was I doing all that I could be?" he shook his head "At some point I think I lost sight on my goal and what that really meant"

Mina brushed her eye, demanding herself to keep it together as she listened to him talking. Thinking to herself, that she could have her melt down after he was done and gone.

"Luckily I have some fantastic friends and mentor who were able to show me where I was going wrong." He looked up at her again, a small but sure smile on his lips "I don't know how to do something without committing to it. I guess you could say that I'm just not really wired that way."

"I understand" she croaked, forcing a smile. He blinked and looked at her with a slightly confused expression.

"I guess what I am trying to say is; I'm really sorry about what happened on the bus. I wouldn't ever do that" he spoke so sincerely, which made it that much harder for Mina to hear it.

"Wouldn't ever" her mind echoed as the words formed a knife and punctured her heart.

"That's why I needed to talk to you. I want to correct my path and do things the only way I know how."

"Here it comes" she despaired

"So, Mina, w-would it be p-possible for us to not go out… not as friends… but as a d-date?" He stammered. A pause passed between them.

"What?" she blurted out, all her raging emotions instantly frozen in an inner flash freeze by that last word he spoke.

"I-I'm sorry, I guess th-this is kinda coming out of nowhere still…" he considered, looking aside, his face growing steadily in colour.

Mina couldn't speak, she couldn't even think. Had she heard that correctly? No way she could have, right?

"All the while I was chasing after All Might, wanting to mimic him, emulate him. Even after learning he has his own circumstances as well; I didn't see it. It was only thanks to some of the guys it clicked. I want to be like All Might, but I don't want to be All Might. There are… things I want that he didn't. L-like… the way I feel when I'm with you." He spoke quietly, hesitantly but there was no mistaking his honestly and resolve.

"S-so, you want go out on a…date?" she managed, her voice low and monotonous, still in complete shock to being blindsided by this.

"Yeah, that's what I really want, Mina-chan" he nodded, forcing himself to maintain eye contact, despite now practically glowing.

"Oh" was all she could manage as the ice began to thaw inside her, melting away the chaotic storm that had been billowing within her head just moments before.

"I r-realise this is out of the blue and th-that you are… well you and I'm just m-me. Even so, if you feel how I d-do…" he broke eye contact, his body turning front facing, his posture slacking a little as he looked down at the patio.

"Okay" she managed, the thaw becoming warmth, heat even. He snapped up and gaped at her.

"O-okay?" he repeated. Mina nodded, her plain expression breaking like a collapsing damn, a smile pouring out all over her face, her forbidden tears glistening her eyes momentarily for a wholly different reason now.

"Yeah, okay" she breathed as she let loose a laugh of relief. Midoriya's face exploded into a delighted smile, which caused Mina's to, somehow, grow even more.

"Really!?" he gasped, standing up and covering his, mouth, nose and cheeks with his cupped hands.

"Really" she confirmed, leaning back stretching her shoulders back, as she had spent the last few minutes hunched over, contented to just watch him and soak in her relief, happiness, shock and million other emotions that now begun to crescendo within her.

"Okay then… well, then I guess I'll make some plans and l-let you know?" he asked, bursting with energy. The ice was well and truly gone now. She felt her heart pounding in her chest, her body felt hot, her cheeks burned but none of it mattered. All that mattered was this moment. This feeling.

"I look forward to it!" she gushed, unable to turn down the levels of her unmitigated joy. It was all she could do not the pounce on the boy and hug the stuffing out of him, so she restrained herself by keeping herself sat down, her smile her only outlet for the billion terawatts of happiness that was surging within her.

"Okay!" he grinned. "Th-then" he started, beginning to move on when something occurred to her.

"W-wait!" she called, standing herself. He turned to her in question

"I don't understand something" she started, closing the short distance between them "Why did you say… you would never…?" she couldn't ask without her blush intensifying but that had been a potent blow when he had said it, but it hadn't meant what she had assumed it did. So, the question begged, what did it mean?

Midoriya looked at her, puzzled for a moment until it clicked, he turned his gaze away for a moment, before settling back on her.

"I-I would never take your first k-kiss without…intended it to mean something more." He murmured shyly "Plus, we weren't in the last light of the setting sun" he smiled. Mina's eyes grew wider as she gasped in surprise

"Y-you remember that!?" she squeaked, embarrassed at that little anecdote coming back like this. His shy expression gave way for his warm smile again as he looked down on her uncharacteristically timid response.

"I never forgot it." he grinned, turning and leaving before his adrenaline gave in to his nerves and he became a gibbering mess. Leaving Mina to realise he had been thinking about her first kiss to which she squeaked again.